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After being with Rafayel for a few months you've noticed a few interesting things about him. For example, he can't seem to leave you alone.
He takes a lot of long baths and always tries to bribe you to join him in - which you usually do because his scented bath bombs smell really good and you need relaxation as badly as air. Work is hard, chores are a bother, people are annoying and you feel under the weather... Yet it fades into nothing when Rafayel brushes your hair and blow-dries it for you while humming a soft melody under his breath.
It's those little gestures, you think, that make you fall deeper into the reveries of him.
Rafayel holds your hand like he'd give up heaven just to make you stay by his side and touches you like he doesn't want you to be away from him; not even for a second. He stares at you like you're the most breathtaking masterpiece he's ever seen in his art gallery, and kisses you like you're love personified.
Because - no matter how bad you might feel about yourself, drowning in the never ending insecurities and sinking deep in the constant worries that keep you up at night - Rafayel loves you. With your so-called flaws and dramatic mental breakdowns. When you poke at him and tease him for being a silly fishie.
He loves you even during the times when you start to feel like the most unloveable being in the whole world because nobody else gives a damn about you and you feel like your life is doomed.
So Rafayel shows it in countless ways, both silent and loudly open. He spends his free time with you and tells you he’ll miss you so badly when you have to go to work. His hand lingers on your cheek when he kisses you goodbye, his thumb brushing against your cheek. It’s soft, tender; as if letting go of you physically hurts.
Perhaps, this is one of the reasons why you think that what Rafayel likes the most is being skin to skin with you.
Sometimes - when it gets a bit too intense - he ends up pretending he’s too tired after a date just so you let him crash at your place for the night.
That’s how you ended up here; wrapped in his body and the messy sheets.
“Mmmm, baby... Don't get up, it's too early.” Rafayel mumbles, words slurring together into a half-needy, half-sleepy whine.
With a small smile tugging at the corners of your lips, you observe him quietly. You don't say anything as his arms wrap around your bare waist, pulling your sore body closer to his chest. His lips brush against the nape of your neck, then, with a raspy whisper that asks you to stay.
His eyelashes flutter against his cheeks, looses strands of his hair brushing against your nose. It tickles.
You squirm a bit but it’s futile. Rafayel doesn’t want you to move.
You're not even sure if he plans to allow you to step out of the bed at all when his arm remains in the same place - draped over your waist, trapping you as close as possible to his own body. You can almost count all of the touch points between the two of you - from the tip of his nose grazing against your cheek, down where his heartbeat is tangled with yours to the way his fingers tap against your exposed thigh. The rhythm is slow and steady; calming, almost.
And yet, you can’t help but shiver when you feel the way his fingertips touch your skin. Once. Twice. And again, and again...
A breath hitches in the back of your throat when you hear Rafayel let out a small content hum that feels like a tremor against your skin.
Normally, you'd probably tease him - just a little bit; to see his ears blush and get all defensive like is not doing what he is doing - for being so openly clingy with you. You do it partially because you enjoy seeing the tips of his ears end up colored in the prettiest. It's not that you dislike it; quite the opposite, actually.
It’s just you’re used to people around you being so serious and adult-like, always keeping their emotions well hidden as if showing a genuine smile and being kind to others without having a hidden interest in gaining something out of the situation is impossible to do. Almost everyone wears a mask and pretends to be someone they are supposed to be - not someone they want to be.
Living in a world that works like that… Honestly, it's painful and full od stress. Luck seems to never be on your side, too, so–
“My sweet girlfriend whom I love a lot.” Rafayel drag out the sentence before sending a playful glare your way. “Stop. Thinking. Too. Much.”
Each word ends being punctuated with the press of his lips against your cheek. You chuckle, startled by the sudden display of affection that contrasts with his nagging.
Usually, you'd press kisses all over his skin, too. Right now, however, you don’t have any energy for your usual bickering.
Frankly speaking, your muscles are still sore after last night and your head is pounding when you try to move it to lie more comfortably on the bed.
Well, you're the one to blame for that. After all, you were too busy whispering Rafayel's name over and over again like a prayer to fall asleep.
Being with him that night was so intense you think you can still feel his kisses lingering on your skin, hot and molten. His touch was greedy, all-consuming.
And yet, you can't help but think you still want more.
You can blame Rafayel for being too good for you, too irresistible. But you know your own selfish desires are at fault, too - you are the one who's unable to erase the burning sensations from the depths of your memories, after all.
Right. Maybe it's truly Rafayel's fault.
After all, he's the one who makes you feel that way; as if a part of him is imprinted somewhere in your soul and now, you're left longing for a piece of him.
“Yeah yeah, okay. I'm not overthinking, I swear.” you let out a heavy sigh, your eyelids fluttering shut.
Thinking straight when Rafayel is so close seems almost impossible.
You try to do so - you swear you do.
It's just your brain is constantly filled with the images of being stuffed full by him, of his hips rolling against yours slowly until you’re drowning in his affection. With your hands in his hair and his lips against yours, it felt almost like you're made of each other. Again and again, each brush of his fingers caused you to fall into the sweet temptation of wanting him more.
Not that you're complaining, though. Being in Rafayel's arms feels nice, even if it makes you unable to get up and do anything productive.
Perhaps, after spending so much time with him, it's his attitude that rubs off on you. That must be why you're becoming so greedy when it comes to him.
With a weary exhale, you lean back a little. From this perspective, you can see the expression on Rafayel's face that - much to your frustration - is as nonchalant as ever, only small flickers of emotions swirl in his eyes.
Since you two started dating, Rafayel has shown you countless sides of him, and while you used to think you know him like the back of your hand back then, now you’re not so sure. You’re still learning him by heart, slowly uncovering his heart - and he does, too. You’re showing him parts of yourself you’ve never dared to expose to anyone else; because you know he will adore you all the same, nonetheless, no matter how wretched and ruined you might think your demons are.
You shake your head, hoping it can clear your mind.
“Rafayel, you're such a bad influence on me.” you flick his forehead, lightly and playfully. There’s a pout on your lips but your eyes are glimmering in the warm sunlight. “You silly fishie.”
Your words are a mix of cheekiness and innocence, something that never fails to catch Rafayel off guard.
With a smirk tugging on your lips, you watch Rafayel's eyes widen ever so slightly in surprise. An emotion akin to the mix of fondness and mischief sparkles in them for a split second before disappearing.
Then, suddenly, Rafayel moves.
A gasp escapes your lips when he tangles his limbs with yours, adjusting his position. You try to squirm your way out– only to feel something hard and heavy press between your thighs.
Blood rushes to your cheeks along with a fresh wave of emotions.
You clear your throat before speaking up again; “See? You're very dangerous. You make me want to stay in bed all day instead of getting up and doing important stuff.” you huff. “Work and finishing the documents filled with reports won't solve itself, you know.”
You hear Rafayel mutter the word ‘boring’ under his breath. It's followed by a heavy sigh and then, him nuzzling his face closer against your pulse. It spikes up when his breath flutters over the sensitive skin on your neck.
Perhaps, you should have expected he would have this effect over you.
“Is it really a bad influence if it feels so good though?” Rafayel asks, his head tilting to take a peek at your face.
You suck in a breath - whether because of his words or the way he stares at you like he knows exactly what you’re thinking and can see right through your little play pretend, you’re not sure. You can’t think straight when his scent is engulfing you and his warmth seeps into your very bones.
“That's not the point.” you whine. “What I mean is that you’re a bad influence because of you I don't get any work done. I should focus on my work first. Those reports are very serious and important. I mean it.”
You glance at Rafayel only to watch his fingers trace meaningless shapes all over the exposed skin of your stomach.
He hums lazily in response. It sounds almost like he's not really listening to you, too focused on how soft and pliant your body feels underneath his touch. How much it makes his fingertips itch with the sheer desire to make you burn with the same need he feels for you.
So why - how - could he possibly pay attention to what you're saying now?
You know better than that, though.
You know Rafayel well enough to be aware that he always pays attention to you. Every little detail, no matter how insignificant it might be for you, seems to mean the world to him - because you do.
When you're working, he keeps his eyes on you. When you're asleep, his hand is holding yours. When you look for him in the gallery, you're always finding him watching you from across the room.
It's only when the topic of going out of bed or bath comes up that Rafayel suddenly acts disinterested.
Right now is no different.
“It's very, very important to rest to gain some power, right?” Rafayel shrugs with an ease that makes you want to bonk his head. Or kiss him stupid. “Besides, it's not like we have to do nothing while sitting here.”
“Yeah, speaking about that - Thomas told me to remind you to finish the paintings since apparently you're deadly sick.” you hum lazily, running your hand through his hair.
“I am–!” Rafayel blurts out. “I mean, I was dying without you here. And I would be dying if you didn’t agree that I can stay the night here after our date.”
You raise an eyebrow at his rambling. “Oh yeah?”
“Yeah, totally. I'm telling the whole truth.”
A sigh lingers on the tip of your tongue. You know that Rafayel is just being dramatic - there's no way he would feel that bad only because you were not by his side, right?
Nonetheless, the tone of his voice - whiny yet silky in its huskiness - lures you in; like a siren song. It makes you weak, your resolve crumbling with every glance at Rafayel. Maybe it’s that oddly endearing pout on his lips or the way his whole face softened in a way that makes your heart lurch violently against your ribs and is your undoing.
But maybe, just maybe, it’s solely Rafayel who's affecting you so much.
“Do you know how badly I needed you? And you were so, so cruel. Leaving me on my own when all I could think about was you and…” his voice trails off, the tapping of his fingers slowing down.
You can feel the tension lingering in the air between you, nevertheless, tinted with desire so intense it's almost tangible. The silence seems to only amplify the lingering hunger and causes your earlier frustration to crumble into something completely different.
Somehow, you find yourself wanting to press your lips against his and just make him stop persuading you so well without even trying. You need him to help you stop thinking so much. You just want to kiss him until you can’t focus on anything but him–
“Anyway,” Rafayel clears his throat, the tips of his ears tinted red as if he can read your mind; “painting is not what I meant when I said we have stuff to do.”
“Hm? What else?” you ask right away, your expression conflicted.
His eyes flicker down to the expanse of your exposed stomach. You swallow forcefully.
Before you know it, his body is pressing closer to yours on the bed.
“I don't know. For example, I could kiss you for a bit.” he whispers, cupping your cheek with his free hand.
Your nose scrunches when he leans in ever so slightly. “Raf.”
“What? Watching you is like taking inspiration from you - and that's almost like painting. Being with you leads me to creating, either way.” Rafayel pauses for a moment, his eyes flickering up to meet your narrowed gaze. A corner of his lips curls up into a smirk. “When I kiss you and touch you, and look at you… it's all a part of the creative process, too.”
You bite down on your bottom lip, resisting the urge to give in and kiss him senseless.
“Is it really taking inspiration or are you just getting better at coming up with pretty sounding excuses just to stay in the bed with me for as long as possible?” you ask with feigned nonchalance.
“I'm telling the truth this time. Scout's honor.” Rafayel places his hand over his chest, right where his heart and the mark of the bond the two of you share are. When your brows furrow, he sighs. “If you don't believe me, I can show you what I see in you and what inspires me about it.”
Slowly, his hand trails up your thigh, his fingers gliding over your skin with a gentleness that's at odds with the urgency of his words and the hidden you can sense lingering in the air. Rafayel leans in to nuzzle his face against where your pulse flutters the most vividly. Then, he presses a tender open-mouthed kiss onto your neck.
“You have a mole here.” Rafayel mutters as he absentmindedly presses his lips against the place he's been pointing out. “Oh, and another one here. I like them a lot, you know.”
You swallow, your body tense with an overwhelming amount of need when you feel him mouthing at your throat. He moves downwards, awfully slowly allowing his lips to graze against your collarbone. You feel his kisses trail down between your breasts, his teeth nipping at the sensitive skin until your body trembles.
“So warm. I like it, too.”
Your eyes flutter shut, your chest heaving with each breath. Whether it's your reaction to his words or actions, you're not quite sure.
Rafayel doesn’t stop, though, allowing his fingers to linger on your breasts. His fingers circle softly against your sensitive nipples as he whispers quietly; “So soft and pretty.”
His mouth slides down to your stomach, and you feel him leave more and more kisses all over your flesh.
It has happened countless times before - in his bedroom and yours, in the bathroom and in his car after going back from your date night on the beach - and yet, it still feels novel. Exciting.
“Raf, stop staring. It's embarrassing.” you mumble, feeling the warm blush creep its way onto your cheeks.
“I don't think I will.” he shrugs back with an ease.
Gently, he interlocks your pinkies together, his gaze fixed on you. For a long moment, he stays like that - quiet and unmoving while simply staring at you. His gaze holds so much adoration you're not sure what to do with it.
“Right. This is…” his thumb slides across the curve of your jaw, tracing slow lazy circles right under your ear. “That's actually a very biteable spot.” Rafayel whispers, his desire for you almost a tangible thing.
For some reason, though, it feels like he's toying with you - just teasing you in the best and most excruciating way possible. And yet, you can't help but want more, addicted to him and the way he makes you feel when his lips press against your skin ever so tenderly.
“Rafayel.” you squirm, your cheeks slightly warm now. Your fingers curl against his nape, brushing against loose strands of his hair. Faintly, you feel his lips curl up against the curve of your jaw. “Don't tease me.”
Rafayel lifts his head up and stares at you through the half-lidded eyes.
A shiver runs down your spine.
Although he's silent, words aren't needed. Not when you can see him studying every inch of your face like you're everything he's ever wanted and more. Like this love he has for you is strong enough to make oceans dry and leave a mark that could last countless lifetimes deep inside your soul.
Rafayel needs you, you realize while holding your breath. All of you.
Little does he know you're in too deep as well.
You've fallen for him so hard that you're not even sure if you would be ever able to find your way out. You'd walk straight into temptation's loving arms if it meant he'd kiss you once again.
Now, too, you'd dive headfirst and lose yourself in Rafayel. Because you need something, anything - and each lazy kiss or messy press of his hips against yours underneath the covers makes you more and more desperate.
You let out a quiet whine.
Almost right away, you think you faintly hear Rafayel calling you cute and pretty under his breath. Before you can react though, he speaks up again.
“My favorite thing about you, however…” Rafayel's voice trails off, his eyes sliding down over your body and then, going back up until he stops at your face.
For a moment, he remains quiet. In the space between your breaths, you remain still while he's studying your expressions with so much care and precision that you wonder if he wants to see right through you. Who knows; perhaps, he's already able to do that.
Your throat feels awfully dry all of the sudden.
“Do you know what it is?” his voice comes out in a breathy whisper this time. Your lips part to respond to him–
Rafayel kisses you.
it's sudden, overwhelmingly so. But you can't think about it when he kisses you like you belong right here - in his arms, tangled in the bedsheets, with his body pressed so tightly against yours that you can't even tell anymore where he starts and you end.
Although you know Rafayel uses the same old method on you again, you fall for it, anyway. You're aware he's coaxing you to bend right into his wishes and give in the way he wants you to because he needs you. In his arms, with your lips moving against his and his hips pressing harder against yours - faster, deeper - in a way that makes your body arch into his.
So when desperation starts melting into his kisses, you don’t stop him.
Rafayel keeps you flush against his body while his other hand reaches out to cup your cheek to angle your head, tilting it back ever so slightly. The kiss deepens then, causing you to arch further into him. His tongue slides against your bottom lip, soothing the stink of his teeth grazing and tugging against the flesh.
You gasp, overwhelmed; but he continues to kiss you, his hunger for you growing more and more with each passing moment.
Rafayel always touches you like he wants to devour you. Like he can't get enough until his name is etched in the deepest parts of your soul. Like he wants to melt all your rational thoughts away so all that remains is a sheer yearning nothing can quell.
Every touch feels like a promise, every kiss like a brand. He's drowning in you, losing himself in this moment while trying to find a way to make you drown in the ocean of passion together with him.
A shiver runs down your spine when you feel Rafayel's fingertips moving across your skin, tracing the curves of your bare body as if he wants to learn it by heart once again–
Until all you'll be able to remember will be the sound of his name lingering forever on the tip of your tongue.
“It's okay.” Rafayel hums when he pulls away for a second, his words a faint tremor against your swollen lips. “Just let me just take care of you, yeah?”
Your lips part to say something, anything - what exactly, you're not quite sure. It's hard to talk and think when Rafayel is so…
You groan in frustration.
Damn Rafayel and his pretty distracting face.
With your eyes closed, you faintly hear him laugh. Slowly, his thumb brushes against the corner of your mouth.
“I think you love the way I love you.”
His words hang in the air, the sound almost like a confession. You've heard it countless times before but your heart flutters, nonetheless.
“Do I?” you pout at him playfully, your arms looped around his neck. Your question is breathy, brittle; and when Rafayel chuckles along with you the moment you pull him just a bit closer in the way that tells you he can see right through your teasing.
“Don't you, baby?”
Warmth seeps from the tips of Rafayel's fingers right into your skin; and then, even further - right into your heart. You're sure, then, that he's the one for you.
"Hm…" you hum thoughtfully while mouthing at his cheek, your teeth grazing against the flushed skin. "Well, you are quite sweet. It's nice, actually. Makes me a bit hungry.”
Rafayel smirks, his eyes sharpening as he watches your lips move off his cheek. You lean back.
“So…” you inhale slowly, observing the way his Adam's apple bobs when he swallows. Loose strands of his eyes fall into his eyes; it takes everything in you not to brush them away. “Maybe I just love you.” you finish in a whisper.
Your hand cups his cheek, thumb caressing his cheek gently– and then, Rafayel kisses you again.
In the blink of an eye, he's deepening the kiss and moving his body right into the space between your thighs. The sudden closure makes you gasp but you pull him closer all the same, unable to fight against the waves of unyielding desire that radiates off Rafayel.
Who are you to say no to him when you want him just as badly, anyway?