Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

“Imogen you have nothing to worry about” A soothing voice calls out through the apartment. “You’re gonna be great! The kids are gonna love you!” 

Fearne Calloway emerges from the hall and sits down on the couch next to her roommate, Imogen Temult. 

Imogen was starting a new job today, and to say she was nervous was an understatement. She was going to be a school librarian at the elementary school down the street. Imogen was already assured by her principal that she was allowed to wear her headphones in case the classes get too loud, but she was nervous. 

She hadn’t had a job in a few years. Since before everything got too loud. 

Imogen was always sensitive to sound, but it was only recently that it started to become unbearable for her to be in a loud room. It would send her straight into a meltdown. 

Since Imogen was always fond of books, Fearne had suggested she go to library school. Working in a library was mostly quiet, and then Imogen would be around books all day. 

“What if I lose my voice, Fearne?” Imogen asks quietly. 

Fearne sighs and turns to Imogen, so her whole body is facing her. She holds her hands out for her roommate to take, and when she does, Fearne squeezes reassuringly. 

“Mr. Bell said you would have a TA right? To help you check the books in and stuff?” 

Imogen nods. 

“He said her name is Jester. She's apparently very…bubbly.” 

Fearne chuckles. 

“You like bubbly. You're friends with me, right?” 

Imogen shrugs. 

“I guess. Bubbliness could come in handy if I don’t have my voice though. She could help me teach the lessons.” 

“There you go! You’re gonna be a rockstar. And on days that I’m not subbing, I’ll come hang out with you. Can I pick out your first day outfit?”  Fearne squeals as she asks.

Imogen chuckles and nods. 

“Okay. But only out of my closet. I’m not wearing any of your clothes to work.” She insists.

Fearne pouts and groans. 

“Ugh, okay. One day I’ll get you in my clothes, Temult. Do me a favor? Order us whatever you want for dinner. My treat.” She replies, tossing her phone at Imogen before disappearing into the purple hair girl’s room. 

Imogen pushes up her glasses and orders dinner, before laying back on the couch and practicing her breathing. Mister, Fearne’s dog, jumps on the couch with her, nudging Imogen’s hand to pet him. 

“Hey, buddy. Did you hear my stress? Good boy.” She gives him all the pets he deserves and then some. Mister is a retired service dog that Fearne adopted a few years back. He’s off duty, but still provides service to Fearne and Imogen all on his own. 

Tomorrow was going to be fine. 

——————————

The outfit Fearne picked out was actually very cute. Some plaid dress pants and a cute flowy blouse. She even braided Imogen’s hair back to keep it off her neck. Fearne was very thoughtful that way, always thinking of ways to help Imogen as much as she can. Imogen tries her best to help Fearne just as much, but she has more trouble figuring out if Fearne is upset unless her roommate is actually crying.

The best thing about Fearne being a permanent substitute was that no one needed a sub on the first day of school. So Fearne gets to hang out in the library with Imogen all day. That got rid of a good amount of first day jitters, however Imogen was still nervous. 

She smiled politely at people as she talked towards the library, and once she got there, she was met by a girl with blue hair, smiling widely at her.

“Hello! I am Jester! It is very nice to meet you!” The girl, Jester, exclaims. 

Bubbly .

“Uh…H-Hi Jester. I’m Imogen.” 

Jester waves, rocking back and forth on her heels. She turns towards the rest of the library and holds her arms out. 

“So, this is the library! Can I give you a tour?” 

Imogen nods. 

“Sure. Have you worked here long?” She asks. 

Jester nods. 

“Well, this is my fifth year in the Jrusar school district, but I’ve been at this school for three. To be honest, I don’t really have to work because my mom is quite famous so I have a lot of money. But it can get really boring when all of your friends work and you don’t. So my best friend Beau, she’s one of the gym teachers here, got me this job! Anyway, let's start over here.” Imogen blinks before following her, still processing everything she said.

“These are the picture books, the chapter books are on the other side, and here!” Jester points to a board and tables. “This is where most of the lessons you teach will happen! The kids are going to love you! They’ll think your hair is sooooo cool!” 

Imogen’s cheeks heat up and she nods. 

“Uhm, before the kids come, I just want to let you know something about me.” 

Jester smiles kindly at her, before sitting down on top of one of the tables. She crosses her legs and looks at Imogen giving her full attention. 

“With…With the teaching. I, uh, I just want you to know that sometimes I may not be able to speak. If it’s too loud or much , you might have to take over.” Imogen explains. 

Jester listens, thinks for a few moments, and then nods. 

“Okay! Maybe in the mornings we can go over the lesson plans together in case that happens?” She suggests.

Imogen lets out a sigh, her mouth forming a smile. 

“Yeah. That works great.” 

——————————

“Where is my bestie?” Fearne calls out as she enters the library. 

A chorus of students shush her. 

“Miss Temult says you have to be quiet in the library!” One first grader says. 

Imogen chuckles at the look on Fearne’s face. Fearne definitely didn’t realize Imogen had a class here. 

“I was just testing you all! You think Miss Calloway would break the number one library rule?” Fearne responds, hopping up on the desk Imogen was sitting at. She leans over and whispers into her roommate's ear. 

“You have my braces in your office?” 

Imogen nods. “Are you okay?” 

Fearne brushes her off. 

“CP acting up today, got some pain. You mind if I grab ‘em?” 

“Go ahead.” Fearne squeezes Imogen’s shoulder and heads inside to put her foot braces on. 

“Miss Temult?” Another student raises her hand and calls out at the same time. 

“Yes, darlin?” 

“Do you and Miss Calloway dye your hair?” 

Imogen can’t help but let out a laugh. It’s true, seeing Imogen and Fearne next to each other with their purple and green hair probably looks strange. Kids can’t help but be curious.

“That’s a secret we’ll never tell!” Fearne says, now walking out, braces on, and sitting back on the desk. 

“What are those Miss Calloway?” 

First graders have a LOT of questions.

“Well, I have something called cerebral palsy. It affects how I move. Sometimes my legs don’t do what I want them to, or they can hurt. So I wear these to help.” 

The class nods. When finally no one has any questions, Imogen continues the lesson until the teacher comes to pick the class up. The first graders all wave goodbye and leave with their teacher. 

Imogen sits back in her chair and looks around on her desk, which is somehow already a mess. 

“What are you looking for, Gen?” Fearne asks.

“My headphones. I need…I need some quiet.” Imogen replies, her looking becoming more frantic. 

“I found them! Here you go, Imogen!” Jester says, lowering her volume immediately as she sees Imogen flinch. She hands her the noise cancelling headphones and Imogen immediately puts them on, sighing as it already gets quieter. 

“Why don’t you go sit in the office until your next class comes? I’ll help Jes finish checking in the books.” Fearne suggests. Imogen nods and moves to the office, laying on the couch in there. 

Fearne turns to Jester and motions to the computer. 

“Shall we?” 

Jester smiles. 

“Of course!”

The two make their way through the books and finish before the next class comes. Fearne puts her feet up on the chair next to her and looks at Jester. 

“So give me the details, Jes. Who’s hot in this school?” 

Jester gasps and clasps her hands together. 

“Oh you guys HAVE to meet the art teacher. She’s scary hot.” 

“Scary hot?” Imogen asks as she leaves the office. 

Jester nods. 

“Her name’s Laudna. I’ll introduce you guys at lunch!”

Chapter Text

A few classes later, Imogen is absolutely fried. She knew the job was going to be difficult. She just doesn’t think she made the connection of just how drained she could get. By the time her lunch hour came, she was almost completely asleep on the couch in her office. The lights were off, her headphones on, and she almost wanted to lock the door to the whole library, but she knew that would make a poor impression. 

“Gen, you gotta eat something, hun.” Fearne says as she walks in. 

Imogen whimpers and shakes her head. She’s so tired . 

“I know, I know. Come here, sit up. I brought it to you.” 

Fearne helps Imogen sit up and hands her a smoothie. Imogen takes a deep breath and takes a few sips, trying her best to get it down. 

“Do you have your voice? Should I find Jester?” Fearne asks, making sure to keep her voice down. 

Imogen takes out her phone and opens up her text to speech. She types for a few seconds and then holds the phone up. 

“ Voice is gone. Let’s wait until after lunch before talking to Jester. I have some time until the next class .” The robotic voice says. 

Imogen sets her alarm to vibrate, lays back down and her eyes flutter shut. 

Fearne squeezes Imogen’s hand, stands and heads to the faculty room for lunch. 

——————————

Jester is sitting there when Fearne arrives. Her gaze immediately goes to the woman Jester is sitting with. The woman has long jet-black hair, but has one white streak going through it. Her hair is tied half up with pencils stuck through the bun. Her skin is so pale it’s almost white, but the rest of her features are very dark and sharp. 

She’s gorgeous. 

“Hi Fearne! Come sit!” Jester exclaims. 

Fearne takes a seat, very slyly putting her feet up on the chair next to her to ease some of the strain. 

“Is Imogen coming? I wanted to introduce you both!” 

Fearne sighs and shakes her head. 

“Not today. She’s recovering right now. Hopefully will be back up and ready for her next class” She explains. 

Jester pouts a bit, but nods understandingly. 

“She’s…recovering?” The mystery woman asks. 

Jester gasps.

“Where are my manners? Fearne Calloway, this is Laudna Bradbury. She teaches art here!” She introduces.  

Fearne shakes Laudna’s hand. 

“Well now I know what you mean by scary hot, Jes.” 

Laudna chuckles. 

“Why thank you, Miss Calloway.” 

Jester turns back to Fearne. 

“So I’m guessing she’s sleeping right now? Should I go back and see if she needs help?” She asks. 

Fearne shakes her head as she pulls out her own lunch, barely picking at the fruit she packed. 

“She’s sleeping. She’s nonverbal but she told me with her app that she wants to wait until a little before her next class. She went over the lesson plans with you, right? I could always help too. I'm not placed anywhere today.”  She explains. 

Jester nods and continues to eat her muffin. 

“Who are you two talking about?” Laudna asks. 

Fearne jumps a bit, honestly forgetting that Laudna is even there. 

“Imogen, the librarian. She’s my roommate and she’s just…having a hard time right now.” She explains as vaguely as possible. It’s not Fearne’s place to explain any further. 

Laudna nods, but doesn’t say anything else. She stands and throws out the rest of her lunch and gathers her things. 

“Well, it was nice to meet you, Fearne. I’ll see you later, Jester.” She bids her farewell and leaves. 

——————————

Imogen’s alarm buzzes on her chest, waking her up. She takes a deep breath. Her head feels less heavy than it did before, which is good, but she doesn’t want to take her headphones off just yet. She figures while Jester and Fearne are still at lunch, she could do some inventory in silence so she doesn’t fall behind. 

She sets the computer to mute and gets started scanning barcodes. Her head jolts up as she hears the library door open, knowing that it wasn’t time for her next class yet. 

A very tall, very beautiful woman walks into the library. 

Imogen has never seen anyone like her before. 

“Hi, darling. We haven’t met yet.” Oh wow her accent is hot. 

She speaks in a slight British accent, something very rare here in Drusar. Imogen could say the same about her own accent, having moved from a small town in Kentucky called Gelvaan. 

“My name is Launda. I teach art here. I know your TA pretty well.” 

Imogen nods, not being able to take her eyes off of Laudna. She quickly starts typing on her computer, pulling up a text to speech website. 

“ Hello. Sorry I wish I could talk myself but it is not in the cards right now .” The robotic voice replies. 

It’s embarrassing, not being able to talk sometimes. Sure, Imogen has come a long way and has figured out ways to communicate without her voice, but she can’t help but feel uncomfortable sometimes when she has to use one of those strategies.

Laudna doesn’t seem to mind, listening intently as the robotic voice speaks, and smiles softly when it finishes. 

“Don’t worry, darling. I can use my imagination to try and figure out what your voice sounds like. Are you listening to music? I’m sorry if I am interrupting.” 

Imogen quickly shakes her head, reaching up and almost taking her headphones off, but decides against it. She still needs them, embarrassed or not.  

“ No. No music playing. They are to help with noise. ” 

“Oh, I see. Even the library can get too loud sometimes. It makes sense to need that buffer.” Laudna supports. 

Imogen lets out a sigh, happy she didn’t need to explain further. 

“Well, I hope you are well enough to join us for lunch tomorrow, Imogen. And if the faculty room is too loud, we can always hang out in here. Whatever is most comfortable. Have a good day now, darling.” 

And then she leaves. 

Imogen puts down her scanner and sits at her desk chair. 

What just happened? 

——————————

“We did it, baby! First day done!” Fearne calls out as she and Imogen get through the front door of their apartment. 

Luckily, Imogen was able to finish out her day strong. After Laudna left, Imogen had more time in silence and was able to recoup enough for her voice to come back. Jester was with her more for those classes than the others, but she didn’t overstep or make Imogen feel like she couldn’t do it. 

Now that the day is over, Imogen is so happy to be home. She quietly goes into her room, changes into her pajamas, and brings her weighted blanket out to the couch. 

“Is Ash coming over tonight?” Imogen asks quietly as she wraps the blanket around herself. 

Fearne comes and sits next to her. 

“They don’t have to if you want a quiet night.” 

Imogen shakes her head. She really gets along with Ashton, Fearne’s partner. They’re a tough person, but they have a secret soft spot for the people they love. 

“No, it’s okay. Tell them to bring dinner?” She asks as she gets more comfortable on the couch with Mister. Fearne types on her phone and places it down on the table. 

“They’re down to bring food. Oh, I don’t think I told you. I met one of the other teachers today and she was so hot. She teaches art.”

Imogen can feel the heat rise on her cheeks. 

“What’s that look?” Fearne asks.

“What look?” 

“Don’t ‘What look?’ me, Tumult.” 

“That’s not fair. You know I don’t know what my face is doing.”

“Your eyes got all wide and your cheeks are burning red.”

Imogen sighs. 

“I met her too. She’s really pretty. And very understanding.” She admits. 

Fearne tilts her head to the side. 

“When did you meet her?” 

Imogen explains to Fearne everything that happened when Laudna paid her a visit. She tightens the blanket around herself, petting Mister as he makes himself comfortable on her lap.  

“Hello teachers I have brought Imogen’s favorite!” Ashton calls out as he enters the apartment.

“Hi, babe.” Fearne says, kissing them quickly. “Guess what?” 

“What?” 

“Gen’s got a new crush!” 

Chapter Text

“Yo, Imogen, you really know how to pick ‘em.” Ashton calls out as they and Fearne look at Laudna’s picture on the school website. 

“I did not pick anyone. And it is not a crush! I barely know her!” Imogen replies, pouting when all Ashton and Fearne do in reply is chuckle. 

Ashton drops down on the couch and playfully throws an arm around Imogen’s shoulder. 

“How did the rest of the first day go? As scary as you thought?” They ask. 

Imogen shrugs, resting her head on her friend’s shoulder. 

“The kids were all super sweet. They complimented my hair.” 

“Because your hair is awesome! Not that I’m biased or anything.” Ashton replies, running a hand through his own purple hair. Imogen chuckles at that.

She sits quietly for a few moments, trying to gather her thoughts. It wasn’t really all that scary. Jester was super understanding and helpful when Imogen was nonverbal. It made her feel confident that Jester could take over should the need ever arise. 

“Wasn’t scary. I lost my voice halfway through the day, though.” She admits. 

Ashton leans over to look at her. 

“How was that?”

Imogen shrugged.

“Fine. Locked myself in my office during lunch with the lights off and my headphones.”

“The nonverbal Imogen special, yes.” 

Imogen laughs and shoves Ashton playfully with her shoulder. At this point, Fearne sits down next to them with plates of food.

“She tell you how the kids love her? Heard one of them say they might like library class this year.” Fearne interjects.

Imogen can feel the heat rise back up.

“Hell yeah, Gen! Put the fun back in library!” 

——————————

The first two weeks of school had come and gone pretty fast. Imogen got the hang of her new schedule, and had pretty much all of her students’ names memorized by now.

She was slowly starting to be able to handle getting through the day without shutting herself away. As each day went by, she was lasting longer and longer before needing to take a break. That's progress. Hopefully by October she’ll be able to get through the whole day. If not, at least she has Jester, who never seems bothered when Imogen goes over the lesson plans with her. 

She's had a few more interactions with Laudna, though very brief and none of which included Imogen speaking. The art teacher always tends to come in when Imogen’s voice is gone. 

Today, though, she and her friends were going to eat lunch together. It was Laudna’s idea initially to gather in the library, since it would be quieter and more comfortable for Imogen. So when Fearne came to her to carry the message, Imogen felt so happy to be thought of so carefully that she agreed. 

She just had to get through the morning without going nonverbal. 

It sounded easy enough, but it was Thursday and Thursday was kindergarten day. 

Imogen decided to have a stem bin day to avoid too many kids coming up and screaming questions at her. 

She decided to put out a bunch of bins full of stem toys on each table and had the groups rotate. In order to keep the volume low, she put up a website that shushed the class if they got too loud. The kids took it so seriously. It was a lot of fun. 

Today was also the day where one of her favorite students came to library class. Now Imogen knows she shouldn’t play favorites, but there is just something about Gwen. She’s very timid, doesn’t really talk to any other kids. She also comes with her own TA, who looks timid in her own ways. The woman is tall and lanky, bright red hair and constantly has different flowers drawn on her arms, some in her own style, and some in a messy, childlike style, most likely Gwen’s. 

Imogen knows from Fearne that the TA’s name is Keyleth, or Miss K to the students. 

Today during stem bin time, Gwen comes over to Imogen’s desk. 

“Hi, Gwen. You alright?” 

Gwen nods and looks at what Imogen is doing. 

“I’m just checking books in, wanna help?” 

“Yes please!” 

Keyleth takes a seat behind the two of them, not saying much, just keeping an eye on Gwen and she helps Imogen check the books in. 

“Okay, now that we’re all done, do you want a head start at picking your next book while the others are busy? The isles will be empty.” Imogen suggests. 

Gwen looks to Keyleth, who shrugs and nods.

“That sound good, Gwen?” 

Gwen turns back to Imogen and nods.

“Do you have any scary books?”

——————————

By the time lunch arrives, Imogen is perfectly fine. She has her voice, and her appetite, and is ready to socialize. 

“I will go grab my lunch from the fridge. Be right back!” Jester calls out as she leaves.

Just as she’s leaving, Laudna walks in. 

“Hello, darling. How’s your day going?” 

“Hi, Laudna. It’s good.” 

Laudna’s face brightens as she hears Imogen’s voice for the first time. 

“She speaks!” 

Imogen chuckles. 

“She does. Sorry it took so long. It’s not really in my control.” She admits. 

Laudna sits down next to Imogen. They’re not super close, but close enough that Imogen’s cheeks heat up. 

“Could I ask how come that happens? Or is it too personal?” Laudna asks as she unwraps her lunch. 

Imogen’s head snaps up at this. She thinks for a few moments about what she wants to say and whether or not she should go into a lot of detail or not. But Laudna is her coworker, she’s going to be working with her all year and potentially longer. And if they’re going to be friends, friends should understand each other. 

“I, uhm…I’m autistic. And, uh, sometimes a lot of noise can overwhelm me to the point where I can’t speak. It sometimes happens in big crowds too.” She explains.

Laudna sits there, listening patiently as Imogen explains. She nods a few times and then speaks up.

“Thank you for explaining. I know it’s not the same but sometimes I need to use a cane to walk. I have something called Ehlers-Danlos syndrome and it affects my joints. We all have our thing and we do what we can to get through the day.” 

Imogen smiles at this revelation. 

“Yeah. Do you keep a cane in your room just in case?” 

Laudna nods. 

“I even have a retractable one in my bag.” She says and pulls it out, shaking it and opening it up. 

Imogen gasps and laughs. 

“That’s cool! I…uhm…I keep my noise canceling headphones in my office. The ones you saw when we first met. I have a work pair and home pair, just in case I need them.” 

Laudna nods.

“It’s sort of nice to talk about this stuff. I’m guessing Bell gave you Jester to help out with teaching?” 

Imogen nods. 

“Yeah. Hasn’t happened yet, but it’s nice to know there’s a solution. Plus she’s really nice.” 

As if on cue, the library doors swing open. 

“Alright ladies, let's get our lunch on!” Fearne calls out as she and Jester come into the library. 

She throws herself down on the couch next to Imogen and hands her roommate a water bottle. 

“Drink that. You don’t drink enough.” 

Imogen scoffs. 

“Yes I do!” 

“Mhm. Sure.” 

Chapter Text

BWAH

BWAH

BWAH

…

BWAH 

BWAH

BWAH

Imogen is jolted awake by the brutally loud sound of her apartment building’s fire alarm. Her hands immediately fly to her ears to help with the pain.

BWAH

BWAH

BWAH

Why is it going off? Is there a fire in the building? 

Her door swings open to reveal Ashton in his boxers and a large t-shirt. In his hand, Imogen’s noise cancelling headphones sit, and they immediately rush over to her to help her put them on. 

“Come on, we gotta go. Fearne is putting her braces on in the living room.” 

Imogen whines, her eyes screwing shut. 

BWAH

BWAH

BWAH

She can’t move. It’s too much. 

“I know it’s hard, Gen, but this can be real so we have to go. Do you need me to help you? Yes or no?” Ashton asks, holding up one hand for yes and the other for no. 

Imogen touches the ‘yes’ hand and Ashton immediately hoists her up. They meet Fearne in the living room, who luckily just finished securing her leg braces and they all head downstairs and outside, joining the rest of the people in their building. Ashton puts Imogen down, but still keeps his arms around her as she hides her face in his chest. 

Everyone is yelling, and, seeing that there is no actual fire, shouting expletives at the apartment manager. 

BWAH 

BWAH

BWAH

Why is the alarm still going off?  

Imogen screams and tucks her head into Ashton’s neck. 

It’s too much .

Each blare of the alarm stabs Imogen’s ears, even with the headphones. Fearne comes behind her and Imogen immediately moves to hug her instead. Fearne starts running her fingers through Imogen’s hair as Ashton heads over to the firefighter who arrived at the scene. 

Fearne moves them over to a bench that is a bit farther from all of the chaos. Once they were sitting, Imogen rested her head on Fearne’s shoulder. She flutters her eyes shut, trying to avoid looking at all of the lights coming from the fire trucks and street lights. 

“Excuse me, darling. Is your friend okay? Does she need help?” 

Fearne looks up to see a brunette woman in a blue night robe approaching. She turns Imogen away from the woman, but smiles politely. 

“She’s okay. She got a bit caught off guard by all of this and is a bit overwhelmed.” She explains. 

“It’s a bit loud out here, right? My husband is with our daughter right now. Gwen doesn’t like a lot of noise either.”

Imogen’s ears perk up at the name mentioned by the woman. She looks up from Fearne’s shoulder and looks at the woman. 

“ G-W-E-N ?” Imogen finger spells in sign language to the woman.  

The woman nods. 

“I hate for now to be the time we meet, but you are Miss Temult, right?” She asks. 

Imogen hesitantly nods. This is definitely not how she wanted to meet any of her student’s parents, nevermind a student she has a strong bond with. 

“ I-M-O-G-E-N ” She signs. 

The woman nods. “Imogen.” She repeats. “My name is Vex’ahlia de Rolo. My daughter speaks very highly of you, Miss Temult. She’ll wake up very excited on Thursdays because she has library.” 

Imogen smiles shyly. 

“And you must be Miss Calloway, right? The substitute?” Vex’ahlia asks Fearne. 

Fearne nods. 

“It’s nice to meet you, Mrs. de Rolo.” 

Vex’ahlia bows her head slightly, turning the opposite direction once she hears a megaphone. 

“False alarm, folks! The alarm got tripped accidentally. You all are free to head back inside, have a good night!” The apartment building manager calls out. The large group of residents all start yelling again and Imogen turns away from all of the noise.

“Well, have a nice night ladies. Got school tomorrow, right?” 

“Goodnight.” Fearne responds as Imogen waves. 

“Alright, ladies. Manager gave us some coupons for the Chinese takeout place down the road for the inconvenience. We ready to get back to bed? The accessible elevator will be usable now, we’ll beat the crowd.” Ashton says as they approach their girlfriend and friend. 

Imogen takes a deep breath and nods, before standing up and heading back to their apartment with her friends. 

When she gets into bed, she’s worried about how she’ll wake up for work the next day. 

——————————

She was right to be worried. As soon as Imogen woke up, she knew today was going to be extra difficult. Even the vibration from her quietest alarm was too loud. She flinches as she reaches over to turn the alarm off. Reaching over to her nightstand, she places her headphones over her ears. 

Her head is pounding. 

A knock sounds on her door, as Fearne pokes her head in. 

“Hey, hun. How are we doing?” She asks quietly. 

Imogen holds up a thumbs down. 

Fearne sighs as she moves over to her roommates bed. She gets in and looks at Imogen. 

“You going to work?” She asks. 

Imogen holds a thumbs up. 

“Okay. Do you want me to text Jes?” 

Imogen thinks for a moment and then replies. 

Yes. Need help today . She signs. 

Fearne nods, kissing Imogen’s head. 

“Whatever you need, Gen. I picked out your outfit last night, it’s on the ironing board. Take your time, it’s still early.” 

Fearne is so good. Imogen met her when they were in their early twenties, in one of their courses at university. Fearne had been very friendly and kind to Imogen, who was a bit more quiet. They got along very well, having similar interests in animals and dyeing their hair. 

The more they got to know each other, the more protective Fearne got of Imogen. Fearne was two years older than her and had once told her she was like the younger sister Fearne always wanted. Once Imogen told her about her autism, Fearne did whatever she could to help her friend out when she was struggling.

Imogen didn’t know what she’d do without her. 

——————————

Usually, Imogen waited until she got to the library to put her headphones on but today was a different story. As she walked through the hall, she kept her eyes on the ground, to avoid making eye contact with any colleagues she didn’t know very well. Fearne joined her after checking in with the office about where she was going to be today. 

“Okay, Gen, I’m in first grade for the morning while Pike is in a meeting, but my day is free after lunch. I’ll come in and hang in here, okay?” She asks. 

Imogen sighs and nods, happy that she’ll have her support for at least some of the day. When she gets to the library, luckily Jester is already there, sitting at their table that they use to go over the plans for the day. 

Jester smiles and waves quietly, which Imogen returns as she walks by to put her stuff down in the office. The plan was for Jester to run the classes, while Imogen focused on checking in the books. Jester was completely down for the plan, asking clarifying questions and assured Imogen that it was totally okay and that she didn’t mind. 

The first class came in, and Imogen already knew that getting through the day was going to be hard. 

“Miss Lavorre! Why isn’t Miss Temult teaching us today?” One student asks. It was an innocent question, nothing against Jester, just curiosity. 

Jester looks at Imogen, who shrugs in return. 

“Miss Temult has a headache so she just needs some quiet, so I’m teaching today!” 

A small smile forms on Imogen’s face. What Jester said wasn’t too revealing of Imogen’s business, it got the point across, and that was that. To the students, Imogen just had a headache. That was all they needed to know, for now. She isn’t sure if she ever would share with her students about her autism, but for now, the answer is no. 

At lunch time, Jester leaves Imogen to herself to lay in the office and heads to the faculty room. 

“Imogen, darling, are you in here?” She hears from the entrance. 

Laudna.

The art teacher in question pokes her head in the office and smiles when she sees Imogen. 

“How are you?” She asks. 

Imogen shakes her head in response. 

“Oh, I’m sorry to hear that darling. Is there anything I can do to help?” 

Imogen shrugs and sits up, patting the spot next to her on the couch. Laudna hesitates, but sits down next to her. 

Sitting this close, Imogen is able to really see all of the features on Laudna’s face. She has a few wrinkles, some crows feet at her eyes and a few lines on her forehead. Imogen knows Laudna is older than her, but she isn’t sure how old exactly. Her hair is very long, around waist length, and there is always a pencil stuck in it for safekeeping. 

Looking back up, she sees Laudna’s eyes. They are so dark they’re almost black, and they are looking right back at Imogen. 

As they make eye contact, Imogen feels her chest begin to feel different. Instead of the heavy feeling she had before, it felt like the weight was lifted off. 

“You know, I admire you a lot. It takes a lot of courage to continuously do something that is difficult for you every day.” Laudna explains. 

Imogen shrugs in response, scratching at her arms. 

She likes working in the library, and she enjoys working with kids. She shouldn’t let anything else affect that. 

“ Thank you. ” She signs. 

Laudna smiles in response. 

“I didn’t know you signed. That must come in handy.” 

After a few minutes of sitting in silence, just looking at each other, Laudna decides to sign something back to her. 

She points at Imogen and then signs.

“ Beautiful .”

Chapter Text

“She called you WHAT?” Fearne exclaims. 

A chorus of third grade “SHH”’s answer her. 

Imogen groaned. The whole point of whispering was to make sure no one hears. A rule Fearne quite frequently forgets. 

“Can someone remind Miss Calloway the number one rule in the library?” Imogen asks the class. A bunch of hands fly into the air. Most of them are waving frantically, but one lays straight in the air, simply waiting to be called on. 

“Yes, Vesper.” 

“You are not allowed to yell in the library. Miss Temult says it disturbs the peace.” The young girl with striking white hair explains. 

“Very good. Go on back to your reading, darlings.” 

The rest of the class goes back to their independent reading. 

“Okay, first of all, rude for making me get shown up by an eight year old.” Fearne starts, rolling her eyes at Imogen’s smirk. She’s speaking much quieter now. 

“Second of all, spill!” She continues. 

Imogen shrugs and continues checking in books. 

“There isn’t much to spill.” 

Fearne huffs and sits down in the rolling seat next to Imogen. 

“Okay, what happened before then?” 

“Of course it is the one time Fearne and I aren’t in here eating lunch, something exciting happens!” Jester whispers. 

Imogen groans and puts her head down, feeling the heat on her cheeks already. 

“Shetoldmesheadmiresme.” She mumbles into her arms. 

“I’m sorry, what was that?” Fearne asks, tapping Imogen on the shoulder and motioning her to sit up. Imogen’s face feels like it’s on fire. 

As if saved by the bell, Mr. Grass comes in to pick up his class. He’s older than Imogen, but still remains young at heart, sporting a short ponytail with some blue streaks in his hair. His wheelchair has some blue and yellow designs on it. Imogen has heard he is a very popular teacher because of his positive attitude. 

The class immediately lines up for him and they make their way out of the library. 

Damn, Imogen thought. No escape now. 

She looks up from her lap and immediately sees Fearne and Jester looking at her. 

“Alright, fine. Let me at least grab my squishy so I don't rip my hands apart while all of this attention is on me.” 

She heads into the office and grabs her favorite purple lightning bolt stress ball. When she returns, she holds it in her lap and takes a breath. 

“So yesterday, when I was…all…out of sorts. She…uhm…Laudna came in during lunch. When she found out that I was still at work even though I was having a bad…off day, she told me she admired me and that I…uh…I had courage for doing things that are…difficult for me.” She starts, taking a deep breath.

“Obviously, I didn’t…you know…have my voice, so I signed ‘thank you’. Apparently she knows sign, I don’t…I don’t know why. But, uh, we kinda just sat and enjoyed each other’s company for a few minutes, and then she pointed at me and signed ‘beautiful’. Thats, uh, thats it.” 

Her nails are digging into her stress ball. If there’s one thing Imogen hates, it’s attention. Which is funny because she works in a school. But attention from kids is different from attention from adults. 

Fearne and Jester are still just looking at her, and Imogen’s skin starts to itch. 

“Well say something already!” She says. 

Jester smiles and puts her hands on her cheeks. 

“Can I be your maid of honor?” 

Imogen swears her eyes are gonna pop out of their sockets.

“Wh-What?” 

Jester squeals. “You two are SO into each other, it's adorable.” 

Imogen immediately starts shaking her head. 

“St-Stop it. We…We barely know each other don’t…already start planning a w…wedding.” 

Did Imogen miss something? Sure, it was sweet that Laudna called her beautiful but it’s not like anyone asked anyone out. For all she knew it was a friendly compliment. And is Laudna even into girls? What if Imogen’s crush is just one way? 

“Jes, take it down a notch.” Fearne cuts in, laying a comforting hand on Imogen. 

Jester looks at Imogen and gasps. 

“Sorry! Beau always tells me I get too excited! I’m working on it!” She apologizes, clasping her fingers together and squeezing. 

“It’s…It’s okay. Who’s Beau?” 

Jester gasps again, her smile returning.

“Only like my best friend in the whole world! She is one of the gym teachers here! She and her wife Yasha got me this job.” 

“Oh yes, I remember you telling me that. Do they have the same lunch as us?” 

Jester shakes her head.

“Ugh, I wish! You would really get along with Yasha. She’s soft spoken, like you can be sometimes.”

Imogen chuckles, knowing Jester probably means that Yasha is also autistic, but decides to ignore it because that’s not her business. 

The three of them look up when the library door opens, seeing Laudna walking in. 

“Hello, ladies. Imogen, darling, I brought you something.” She says, pulling a piece of paper out of her bag. 

“Wh-What is it?” Imogen asks.

Laudna unfolds the paper and lays it out on the table. It is a drawing, clearly done by a younger student, of a girl with purple hair, holding a book. The drawing is holding something in her other hand too, but Imogen can’t make it out.

“Is that…me?” She asks. 

Laudna nods. 

“I had kindergarten draw a picture of someone they look up to. Gwen de Rolo drew you, darling.” 

Imogen gasps quietly. Gwen looks up to her? 

“But…but why would she…” She starts. 

Laudna places her hand on Imogen’s wrist, bringing Imogen’s attention to her. 

“She said you and she are the same.” 

Imogen smiles. She knows Gwen is also on the spectrum because she read her IEP in the beginning of the year. Gwen struggles a lot and is even an elopement risk, hence why she has Keyleth with her. Back when Imogen was in school in Kentucky, she had similar issues, but instead of ‘elopement risk’ she was simply called a ‘runner’ or the ‘problem kid’. 

She's happy special education has made a lot of progress since she was in school.  

“Do you know what this is? In my other hand?” 

“Your headphones.” 

Fearne wraps her arms around Imogen from the side, giving her a quick squeeze. Which is beyond helpful because Imogen feels like she isn’t even on the planet right now. 

“That’s so sweet, Gen. I told you the kids were gonna love you.” Fearne tells her. 

Imogen nods a bunch of times. 

“That’s so nice.” 

——————————

Later that day, Fearne had to cover a class and Jester decided to eat lunch in the faculty room, which just left Imogen and Laudna in the library.

“So now that the two conversation hogs aren’t here, tell me about yourself darling.” Laudna asks, taking a bite of her salad.

Imogen thinks for a few moments, having no clue what to say. 

Tell me about yourself. 

Tell you what about myself? 

What exactly do you want to know?

“I, uhm. Can you, maybe, ask me a question. That’s, uhm, a lot to pinpoint what to say.” She asks quietly. She hates asking for clarification.

“Oh yea, of course. Sorry, Imogen. Okay let’s start with, where are you from?” Laudna rephrases no question. 

“Uhm, Gelvaan. Kentucky.” 

“That explains the accent. Southern girl.” 

“What…What about you?” 

Laudna’s eyes widen and a smile appears on her face. It doesn’t look like a full smile, though. Maybe a half? 

“Well, for a while, I lived in a small town called Whitestone overseas. Things changed when I was in my early twenties though. But now I’m here!” She explains, and even Imogen knows not to press any further. 

She nods quietly, trying to think of her own question. 

“Do you…have any pets?” She asks, and smiles when Laudna gasps and her smile fills up her whole face.

“Yes! I have two pet rats, Pate and Sashimi! Can I show you pictures?” Laudna asks her.

The way Laudna speaks is so animated, in the best way. She speaks with her whole body, and her voice is so…musical. 

Imogen hums and nods, trying not to let her nerves show as Laudna moves to sit next to her so she can show her pictures. 

“The long and skinny one is Sashimi, she is the youngest. The little short and stout one is Pate, he was my best friend when I moved here and didn’t know anyone.” Laudna explains, swiping through many pictures of the rats. 

“They’re so cute!” Imogen says, and she’s serious. Laudna’s rats are a little funny looking, but in the most endearing way possible. 

Laudna lets out a real laugh in excitement and then she turns to Imogen.

“Do you have any pets?” 

Imogen nods, then shakes her head, then nods again. 

“Well, I live with Fearne, and she has a dog. His name is Mister and he is a retired service dog. He is a sweetheart. He always cuddles real close when I’m having a hard time at home.” She explains.

“He sounds like a very good boy.” Laudna replies.

Talking with Laudna is very easy, Imogen realizes. She likes that. 

“How old are you?” Imogen blurts out, then her eyes widen and she gasps. “Don’t answer that! I’m sorry that was rude!” 

“It’s alright darling. I’m forty three. How old are you?” 

“Twenty eight. Sorry that question just came out.” Imogen answers, embarrassed.

Laudna shrugs it off and takes another bite of her lunch. 

“Age is just a number. I don’t really think it matters much once you pass 25.” She admits. 

“Really? What about for dating?” Imogen asks, again her filter escaping her.

“How do you figure?” Laudna asks, tilting her head at the question. Her neck cracks, causing them both to laugh at the noise. 

“Well, I don’t know much about dating, but some people think big age gaps and stuff matter a whole lot.” Imogen explains. 

Laudna shrugs again, nodding along.

“Not to me. I love the person, not how old they are or what gender they are. As long as they are above eighteen that is. But even eighteen might be a stretch so probably twenty one.” Laudna rambles on, realizing what she was saying. But Imogen honestly zoned out after she heard one thing.

Or what gender they are. 

Does that mean?

“What…What do you mean ‘or what gender they are’?” Imogen asks, interrupting Laudna’s rambling. 

“Oh, I’m bisexual. I don’t really mind.” 

Bisexual. 

Laudna is bisexual. 

“Oh.” 

Oh? Imogen you can do better than that. 

Her mouth closes and opens a few times, and she’s trying to find what words to say next without completely making a fool of herself. 

Laudna deflates in front of her, getting ready to leave. 

“I, uhm, I’m sorry if I made you uncomfortable Imogen. I can lea-“

“No! I’m gay!” Imogen blurts out. 

So much for not making a fool out of herself. 

Laudna relaxes and sits back down. 

“Oh thank goodness! You worried me, darling.” 

“Sorry I short circuited.” 

They both immediately start laughing and it feels like the air is lighter. At least for Imogen. Knowing Laudna could be interested is so relieving. 

After they calmed down, Laudna simply stared at Imogen for a few moments. Imogen wished she had a better grip on facial expressions for moments like this. 

“Why are ya’ lookin’ at me like that?” She asks. 

Laudna moves to sit a bit closer to her. Now they’re so close their legs are touching. 

“Why did you short circuit when I said that?” She asks, her voice low. 

Her voice sounds like velvet. 

“No, uh, no reason.” 

Imogen is shit at lying when she's flustered. 

“You know, I meant it when I said you're beautiful, darling.” Laudna says, reaching up to tuck a stray piece of hair behind Imogen’s ear. 

If she could actually set herself on fire, Imogen would actually be doing that at this moment. She HAS to be beet red right now. 

“Th-Thank you. You are too” She replies, her eyes drifting down to Laudna’s lips. 

Is Laudna leaning in? 

Is this actually going to happen? 

“Imogen! Fjord looked so dreamy in the faculty room!” 

The two women jump away from each other as Jester barges in, squealing and shouting. Imogen’s hands fly to cover her ears, shocked by the loud volume when she and Laudna have been speaking so softly to each other. 

Laudna’s hand rests on her arm and she hands Imogen her headphones, which she immediately puts on. 

Jester skips over to them and sits down. 

“Sorry! Volume! I’ll fix it.” Jester apologizes.

Imogen just nods in return, taking breaths. 

At this point, the library door opens again and it’s the next class coming in, so Laudna stands and smiles softly at Imogen. 

“I’ll see you later, darling.” 

And then she’s gone. 

Jester looks where Laudna heads then back to Imogen.

“What did I miss?”

Chapter Text

There’s an old box in her attic, where she’s not allowed to go. 

She’s been told many times not to go up there, but her daddy isn’t home. He’s at work, like he always is. 

And it’s quiet in the attic. That’s why she went up there the first time.

But then she found the box. It was such a pretty box, too. It was covered in purple gems that would shimmer in the light. It reminded her of the crystal that was left to her from her mother. She was drawn to it. 

When she opened it for the first time, she gasped when she saw a picture of her mother. She had no idea what her mother looked like, her daddy told her she was just a baby when her mother left. Now she’s ten years old, seeing her for the first time. 

No wonder her daddy doesn’t look at her for too long. She looks just like her mama. 

She runs her finger over the photo, then puts it to her side and keeps looking through the box. There’s a bunch of papers that look real official, but that’s boring so she keeps looking. She finds a necklace, a gold chain with a purple lightning bolt. 

It’s so pretty. It’s her favorite color, too. She can’t help but put it on. 

There’s a bunch more pictures in the box. Some of her mother and father, some of her mother and some lady she’s never met, and some of just her mama. When she reaches the bottom, she smiles when she sees it. 

A photo of her and her mother.

She didn’t think one of these existed. She’s so little in the picture, her mama holding her. Maybe this was when she was born, she barely has any hair. 

She’s interrupted by the attic door slamming open. 

“What are you doin’? You know you’re not allowed up here, Imogen!” Her daddy started screaming, really loud. 

Her hands immediately cover her ears. Why is he yelling so loud? It hurts!

“You need to listen to me when I talk to you, Imogen. Covering your ears don’t cover up that you’re in trouble. Clean this up and then come downstairs, understood?” 

Imogen sniffs and nods, cleaning up the box, but secretly putting the picture of her and her mama in her pocket. 

When she goes downstairs, her daddy is sitting at the kitchen table, his head in his hands. 

“Imogen, I really need you to listen to me when I talk to you. Covering your ears is very disrespectful. ” 

“ ‘m sorry, Daddy. The noise hurts.” 

“Don’t say that, darlin’. You gotta get used to it. There’s a lot of noise in the world. People aren’t going to jump through hoops for you.” 

People aren’t going to jump through hoops for you.

People aren’t going to jump through hoops for you.

People aren’t going to jump through hoops for you.

People aren’t going to jump through hoops for you.

People - 

Imogen sits up in bed, her chest heaving. Mister is barking at her door, scratching, trying to get in. 

Fearne opens the door, letting Mister jump on Imogen’s bed to help her calm. Fearne follows, sitting down next to her and wrapping her arm around Imogen. Imogen bursts into tears, trying her best to control her breathing.

“It’s okay. You’re here in our apartment. Mister is here, I’m here. Ash is down the hall. We love you, we care about your well-being. You are not a burden.” Fearne tells her, running her fingers through Imogen’s long purple locks. Mister sits in Imogen’s lap, and the pressure he puts on her helps. She puts her hands on the dog, trying to focus on the texture of his fur on her fingers. 

When she finally calms down, she rests her head on her roommate's shoulder. Fearne kisses her head and gives her a squeeze. 

“How are you doing, hun?” 

“B-Better.” 

“Good. Take your time, don’t push yourself, okay?” 

Imogen nods, her eyes fluttering shut as she just focuses on taking deep breaths. 

“If you want to talk, you know I’m here, but if you don’t that is completely okay. You’re in control here.” Fearne tells her, reaching to Imogen’s nightstand to grab a hairbrush. She starts brushing Imogen’s hair, which honestly feels so nice. They sit in silence as Fearne braids her hair. Imogen’s hair is so long that even the braid comes to her mid back. She doesn’t like getting her hair cut. 

“It was just my dad.” 

“I’m so glad I’ve never met him. I would start swinging immediately.” 

That got a laugh out of Imogen. 

“He tried his best, Fearne. Didn’t want me to be treated any differently.” 

“He let you struggle until you were fifteen before finally allowing you to go to the doctor to get diagnosed. Gen, you deserved better than that.” Fearne explains, then continues before Imogen can disagree. “Doesn’t matter anymore. You’re with us now. And you will never wonder what love feels like again, alright?” 

Imogen sighs and nods. 

“Thanks, Fearne.” 

“Of course.” 

——————————

Another day, another dollar.

When Imogen gets out of Fearne’s car, she smiles as she notices the leaves have started to change. Fall is starting to set in as they head into mid October. Even though she had a nightmare last night, she still feels relatively ready for the day to begin. After they sign in, Fearne goes to get her assignment for the day and Imogen heads to grab her key. 

A woman is standing in front of the mailboxes, where Imogen’s key is. She’s very strong, her muscles showing since she was wearing a tank top. Her hair is short, buzzed on the sides and the top is pulled into a bun. She seems like she has abs for days . Next to her is another woman, much taller than her. Her black hair is long, pulled half back to show some white, and it looks like there are little braids throughout. She’s never seen them before, or maybe she has at faculty meetings, but Imogen usually just keeps her eyes down during those so she doesn’t accidentally make eye contact with anyone. 

They seem to be having a moment with each other, very focused on each other rather than the world around them. Imogen doesn’t want to interrupt, but she needs to get her key. They both look really strong, and Imogen kind of feels intimidated. 

“Good morning, Imogen!” She hears, causing her to look behind her. Jester skips up to her happily, stopping in front and smiling. 

“Good morning, Jester.” 

“Oh, Beau! Yasha! This is Imogen! The librarian!” Jester squeals, skipping over to the two women and motioning towards Imogen. Imogen smiles shyly.

The shorter woman, Beau based on Jester’s past descriptions, looks Imogen up and down, then whispers to the taller woman, Yasha. Imogen can’t help but feel anxious at this.

What could she be saying?

“I’m Beau, this is my wife Yasha. We’re gym teachers.” Beau says, short and simple. 

“I am so happy you all are finally meeting! Imogen doesn’t talk much, but I’m glad you were here!” Jester says. 

Imogen clears her throat, slightly rocking back and forth on her heels. 

“My, uh, my key.” Imogen mumbles. 

Beau’s brows furrow, leaning closer to Imogen, and Imogen hopes she doesn’t ask her to repeat herself, she’s uncomfortable enough. A hand on the small of her back pulls her out of the conversation as she turns to see Laudna’s smiling face. 

“Good morning, darling. Have you grabbed your key yet?” She asks her. Imogen shakes her head and Laudna walks towards the mailboxes, grabs her own keys, and turns towards Beau and Yasha. 

“Excuse me, may I just get to Imogen’s mailbox to grab her key? You are in front of it.” She asks.

Beau immediately moves away. “Oh shit, sorry Imogen. Didn’t realize.” She says, moving closer to Yasha. 

Imogen's face burns as Laudna hands her her key. 

“It’s okay. ‘T was nice meeting y’all.” She says, smiling shyly and turns to leave with Laudna. As they walk away, she hears Yasha say something to Beau. 

“You’re right, Beau. She is really cute.” 

Imogen is going to pretend she didn’t hear that. 

“How was your night, darling?” Laudna asks as they walk down the hall. 

Imogen shrugs. 

“Fearne’s partner Ashton came over for dinner, which was nice. But I had a nightmare, which wasn’t nice.” She reveals. 

Laudna’s hand appears on her lower back again. 

This is new. 

“I’m sorry to hear that, darling. Do you have nightmares often?” Laudna asks, giving Imogen her rapt attention. 

Imogen nods. “Yeah, uh, since college.” 

Laudna sighs and the hand on Imogen’s back moves up and down. It’s really comforting. 

“Well, I know when I have them, the thing that helps me calm down is to drink a glass of water.” Laudna suggests. 

A smile grows on Imogen’s face. It’s really sweet that Laudna is trying to help her. 

“Thanks, Laudna, I’ll try that.” 

“Can I walk you to the library?” Laudna asks. 

“That would be nice.” 

They walk together in a comfortable silence until they reach the library at the end of the building. They walk in together and Imogen puts her stuff down before turning back to Laudna. Laudna is just looking back at her, a small smile on her face. 

“What are ya smiling at?” Imogen asks. 

Laudna shrugs, and bites her lip. 

“All I’m thinking about right now, darling, is finishing what Jester interrupted. Would that be alright?” Laudna asks. 

Imogen’s eyes widen. 

Wait what?  

“You mean -” 

“Can I kiss you, Imogen?” 

Holy shit. 

Imogen nods a bunch. 

“Try your words, darling. I just want to make sure you are completely comfortable.” 

Imogen nods and clenches and relaxes her hands. 

“Y-Yes.” 

And then Laudna finally closes the space between them.

Chapter Text

Holy shit.

Holyyyyy shit.

Laudna is a great kisser.

When Laudna pulls away from her, she reaches up and tucks a strand of hair out of Imogen’s face. 

“Was that alright, darling?” 

Imogen nods, starting to rock back and forth. She can’t fight the smile forming on her face. 

Say something, Imogen . 

“I…uhm…”

Her hand starts to rhythmically tap her thigh.

Come on . 

“I…like you a lot, Laudna.” She finally says. 

Laudna’s pale cheeks start to redden. Imogen thinks her own face must be fire truck status by now. She watches as Laudna reaches up and scratches the back of her head, fumbling with the clip that’s in her hair. 

“Darling, I can’t even find the words to tell you how happy that makes me.” She replies. 

That makes her happy. 

She's happy, but does she also like me? 

She’s gotta because she kissed me. That means Laudna likes me, right? 

Imogen’s hand starts tapping a bit harder, trying to wrap her head around the thoughts she's having. 

“Hey, darling.” Laudna’s musical voice interrupts Imogen’s loud thoughts. She carefully takes Imogen’s hand, running her thumb over the back of it. 

“What’s going on in your beautiful head, hmm?” Laudna asks. 

“You…uh…’m sorry this might sound dumb.” Imogen starts, eyes focusing on Laudna’s hand in hers. 

“Never.” Laudna reassures her. 

Imogen takes a deep breath, then nods. 

“You said it makes you happy…but…uhm…do you like me too?” She asks, feeling stupid for even asking, but she needs to make sure she understands. 

Laudna’s smile disappears and her eyes widen. 

“Oh, I’m sorry, Imogen. Yes, I do very much like you. I apologize that I was not clear.” She apologizes, kissing the top of Imogen’s head. 

Imogen sighs in relief. 

“Oh thank god,” She says, hugging Laudna, whose hands come up and run through her hair. 

“Would you like to have a date with me?” Laudna asks. 

“Sure. What would you like to do?” 

“Well…perhaps I could cook for you? What is your favorite food?” Laudna asks. 

Imogen thinks about it. 

“Hmm. I’m not sure…funny enough I think I need to ask Fearne because she does the cooking at home. But…that's real sweet you wanna cook for me. I like that idea.” She explains. 

They pull apart from the hug when the library door opens. Fearne and Jester waltz in and even Imogen can understand the looks on their faces. 

“You two snoops were looking, weren’t you?” She asks. 

Jester starts squealing and jumping up and down. Laudna’s hands come to cover Imogen’s ears, and Imogen almost melts at how thoughtful that was. 

“Fearne, do you know what Imogen’s favorite food is?” Laudna asks, removing her hands from Imogen’s ears when Jester finally stops squealing. 

“Mac and cheese. When we were in college it was all she’d eat if we went to one of the dining halls.” Fearne explains. 

Imogen sits down at her desk, bringing Laudna with her, who sits in Jester’s chair. 

“That dining hall had so much vegan food. Which is fine and all but it just wasn't for me.” She explains.

Fearne starts laughing, sitting at another chair at the desk. 

“Don’t put anything green in front of her, Laudna. She won’t touch anything else on the plate.” 

Imogen’s face burns at how true it is. She turns to Laudna, who just has a smile on her face. 

“No greens, got it. Oh don’t look at me like that, darling, it’s fine,” She says, tapping Imogen’s nose. 

When the bell rings for the students to come in, Laudna bids her farewell and returns to her art room, since she has a class first thing. Imogen looks at her two (idiots) friends and already knows she's in for it. 

“Can y’all spare me until I've had my coffee?” 

“Absolutely not.” 

—————————-

The week goes by quickly, albeit Imogen was a bit distracted throughout. She kept thinking about the fact that she has a date with Laudna. She’s excited, but very nervous at the same time. Imogen doesn’t have that much experience with dating. She’s had a few crushes, but there have only been a few dates here and there. The girls she went on dates with usually didn’t call her back after the first date. She was never told why, and never asked because she was too uncomfortable with confrontation to do so. Fearne would assure Imogen that those girls were bitches and it had nothing to do with Imogen, but it was hard for Imogen to believe. 

She knew a date with her was different from dates with most people. Imogen is aware of her differences. She knows that most college girls want to go to parties or bars, but Imogen hates crowds. She tends to avoid them so she could avoid getting overstimulated and having a meltdown. That’s what worked for her, and that’s okay. It’s also okay that people want something different than her. 

Needless to say, Imogen hasn’t had the best of luck in dating. 

Laudna knows Imogen, though. She didn’t meet her on a dating site or in class. She works with her, and was friends with her first. Laudna knows about Imogen’s autism. She knows and doesn’t treat Imogen any differently. Laudna even helps her if she needs it. 

So it’ll be fine. It will be good, in fact. 

“Gen? You good?” Fearne asks.

Imogen looks up in confusion.

“Hmm?” 

“You’re stimming a little more today. Is something bothering you?” 

Imogen finally realizes that she’s been flapping her hands at her sides and clenches her fists. 

“You don’t need to stop, hun. Just wanted to know if you need to talk?” Fearne asks, carefully unclenching Imogen’s hands. 

“I…I don’t really know.” Imogen admits.

“Is it about Laudna?” Fearne asks. 

Imogen sighs and nods, sitting down on her bed. She moves to the side to make room for Fearne, who sits next to her. 

“Look, you know I would absolutely destroy anyone who hurt you. That’s a promise.” Fearne says, completely serious and Imogen can’t help but laugh because she knows it’s true. 

“But to be honest, Gen. Laudna doesn’t seem like those other bitches. She seems genuine.” 

Imogen nods. 

“I think that’s part of why I’m nervous. I don’t want to mess it up if I’m too much.” 

Fearne wraps her arm around Imogen, giving her a squeeze.

“You, Imogen Temult, are never too much. Anyone who thinks that did not deserve you to begin with. Understood?” She tells her. 

Imogen sighs and nods. She realizes she might have to be upfront with Laudna about this, because she's read that communication is important in relationships. This seems like

something she should communicate.

“Thanks, Fearne. Do you…uhm…is it alright if I ask Laudna to come over?”

Fearne starts wiggling her eyebrows. 

“Not for that you perv!” Imogen exclaims, her hands coming up to her face in shock.

Fearne immediately starts laughing and kisses Imogen’s head. 

“Hey, never say never! Of course, Laudna can come over. I’ll make sure Ash keeps their shirt on while she’s here.” 

Imogen nods and takes out her phone. 

Imogen : Hi Laudna. Would you like to come over?

Laudna : Sure, darling. What time?

Imogen : In an hour? 

Laudna : Sounds good. Just send me your address. See you soon

“Okay. She’ll be here in an hour.” 

“Proud of you.” 

————————— 

Laudna sends her a quick text that she is there so Imogen could buzz her in. That’s one of the bonuses of living in an apartment, you get a bit of a warning when your guests arrive before they are actually at your door. Imogen spends the time it takes Laudna to get to their floor taking deep breaths, assuring herself that it’s Laudna and Laudna has always made Imogen smile. 

By the time the knocking on the door starts, Imogen feels ready. She opens the door and… wow . 

Laudna looks gorgeous. 

She isn’t in her normal school clothing. She’s wearing a long black skirt and what looks like a corset. Her hair is pulled up in a bun and secured with a gold clip. She looks amazing.

“Hi, darling.” Laudna says.

Imogen stands there, brain short circuiting. 

“Imogen, are you quite alright?” 

“Y-You look so pretty.” Imogen blurts, cheeks heating. 

Laudna chuckles and kisses Imogen’s forehead. 

“Thank you, darling. You do as well. May I come in?” Laudna asks, and Imogen gasps before moving out of the way, silently cursing herself for acting like a fool. 

Mister trots in and heads up to Laudna, sniffing her and assessing her. Fearne always told Imogen that dogs are good judges of character, and if Mister likes Laudna, then Laudna has good character. Imogen could see that already, but it’s nice to have Mister there to confirm. 

After a few seconds, Mister starts licking Laudna’s hand and nudging it for her to pet him, which she gladly does. 

“Is this the sweetheart who helps you at home?” Laudna asks.

Imogen nods.

“This is Mister, technically a retired service dog but he doesn’t ever stop working. His choice, though. He won’t fetch a ball but he’ll get Fearne’s leg braces if he thinks she needs them.” She explains. 

Laudna pets him some more.

“Well you just like to help people, then. What a good boy.” 

Mister happily licks Laudna’s face and rushes over to the master bedroom door when Ashton comes out. 

“Hey! You must be Laudna. Love the whole goth vibe you got going on. It really suits you.” Ashton says, holding their hand out to shake, which Laudna does. 

“And your punk vibe suits you. I am assuming you are Ashton, yes? Fearne’s partner?” 

Ashton adjusts his vest and nods. Imogen smiles. It took a long time for Fearne and Ashton to acknowledge that they were in a relationship. They hooked up a bunch while seeing other people but would always end the night in one’s apartment, usually Fearne’s since she likes to be there if Imogen has a nightmare. 

Eventually they started to get upset if the other was late, or wondered who it was they were seeing before finishing the night in their bed. It was a loud, heated argument that finally ended with them realizing that they weren’t just friends with benefits. That was two years ago and they’ve been monogomas ever since. Now they’ve been teasing each other that Ashton is at their apartment more than his, and Imogen wonders when he’ll bite the bullet and just move in. 

She’s been in her head for a few minutes, only coming back when Ashton and Mister leave the living room, leaving Laudna and Imogen alone. 

“Did you want to talk, darling?” Laudna asks. 

Imogen nods.

“My room is over here. Can we talk in there?” 

Laudna agrees and they head in. They both sit on the side of the bed, Imogen’s eyes in her lap. She starts rubbing her hands together, trying to figure out how to start what she wants to say.

“Darling, whatever it is, I just want you to know that you’re safe to talk about it. You can tell me anything.” Laudna tells her. 

Safe.

She’s safe. 

Imogen takes a deep breath and nods. 

“I…Going on dates with me is not like…the same as going on dates with others. I…uh…I can’t handle a lot of public spaces. We wouldn’t get to go to…like…bars or things like that unless there’s outside seating. Concerts…anything like that. I mean…I have my headphones but even then sometimes it’s too much. I…uh…I just want you to know about that now so I don’t mess anything up by having a meltdown.” She starts to explain. 

Laudna nods as she listens, her thumb running over the back of Imogen’s hand as she speaks. 

“Darling, none of those things matter to me. I know you. I care for you. We could do anything and I wouldn’t mind because I’d be with you. Alright?” Laudna explains. 

Imogen nods, still not looking up. Laudna tilts her head, thinking before speaking up again. 

“Come here.” Laudna says, slipping her shoes off and laying down on Imogen’s bed, opening her arms. Imogen hesitates, but lays down, her head on Laudna’s chest. Her heartbeat is very slow, it’s kind of relaxing. She can actually feel herself starting to calm down listening to it. 

“Do you want to watch something?” Laudna asks. 

Imogen nods, grabbing her remote and handing it to Laudna. 

“What do you like to watch?” Imogen asks. 

Laudna smiles. 

“There’s this cool show I’ve been watching, can I show it to you?” 

“Mhm.” 

They laid in Imogen’s bed for the rest of the night watching Laudna’s show, which ended up being about redecorating houses. Imogen actually ends up falling asleep a few hours in, and is woken up by some talking. She keeps her eyes shut as she listens. 

“...Seriously, though. If you hurt her, I will not hesitate.” 

Chapter Text

The day started out pretty normal. Today was parent-teacher conferences and since Imogen is the librarian, she didn’t have much on her schedule. She got to have a nice conversation with Mrs. de Rolo about her five children, including Gwen and Vesper, but other than that her schedule was clear. 

Jester was helping some of the other teachers with making copies to keep herself busy, since Imogen assured her that she didn’t need any help. That left Fearne and Imogen hanging out in the library. 

“You and Laudna seemed pretty comfy in your room the other night. Are you ready to talk about it?” Fearne brings up. 

Imogen can feel her blush grow but shrugs. 

“I don’t understand it much. Most people are too much for me to have so close. With her…I don’t know. The best way I can think about it is with music, so bear with me.” Fearne nods, her face completely neutral. Well maybe not neutral, but there doesn’t look like any teasing facial expressions that Imogen can tell. 

“Imagine you're walking around hearing a bunch of songs all at once. But they’re all off tune.” 

Fearne cringes and Imogen nods. 

“Exactly. A lot of people I first meet are like that. Their voices are too loud or they’ll bump into me when I’m overstimulated and I’ll feel like I’m gonna die. You and Ashton aren’t like that, but it took some time to get there. But Laudna…none of that stuff happened with her from the start. It’s weird. I’m still learning about myself every day and I’m tryin’ to figure out what that could mean.” Imogen continues to explain. 

“I get it. How did your date go? You were so sleepy after I didn’t want to overwhelm you.” Fearne asks.

Imogen shrugs again. 

“I think it went well. We’ve been texting a lot and she walked me to the library again this morning. Maybe that’s a good sign?” 

Fearne smiles softly and Imogen realizes how off Fearne has been since this morning. She’s calm and quiet, even if she’s making conversation. Imogen takes a second to really look at Fearne. She looks paler than usual. 

As if Fearne’s body knew it was being watched, Fearne let out a cough. It did not sound good. 

“Holy shit, are you sick?” Imogen gasps, leaning over to feel Fearne’s head. Her roommate leans back to try to avoid Imogen’s hand but to no avail as another cough takes over. 

Her head is hot.

“Fearne! You have a fever! How long have you not been feeling well?” Imogen asks, grabbing her phone. 

“A few days…” Fearne admits and Imogen wants to scream.

“You know a fever can go south fast with you. Why did you hide this?” 

Fearne shrugs.

“I don’t want to go to the hospital.” Fearne mumbles, and Imogen can really see how much she doesn’t feel well. She sighs and wraps her arms around Fearne, squeezing and shushing her as Fearne starts to cry. 

“It’s so annoying that I have to go every time I get sick.” Fearne says.

People who have Cerebral palsy are more susceptible to getting respiratory illnesses and infections, so since Fearne was a little kid, she's had to go to the emergency room whenever she has a fever to prevent the sickness from taking a turn. Imogen has gone with her a bunch of times from college to now, and today is no different. 

“I’m gonna call Bell, and tell him we have an emergency. Would you like to call Ashton and explain why he hasn’t been over in a few days or would you like me to do that?” Imogen asks. 

Fearne always steps up to the plate when Imogen needs help. Imogen always does the same. It’s how they work. 

Fearne coughs again and points to Imogen, who gets to work. 

—————————— 

They made it to the hospital and had Fearne checked in for monitoring. Fearne knew all of the doctors and nurses by name and started chatting them up, trying to downplay how sick she felt, but Imogen could see right through it. 

A half hour later, her phone begins to buzz a few times. She recognizes the vibration pattern as the tone she set for Laudna, so she immediately pulls her phone out. 

Laudna : Is everything alright, darling? I heard you and Fearne had an emergency. 

Imogen : Hi - Fearne is in the hospital. Not serious right now but we have to take precautions because of her cp

Laudna : That sounds awfully stressful. I hope she gets better. How are you? 

Imogen smiles, her already anxious heartbeat quickening. 

Imogen : It’s loud here, but I’m alright. Waiting for her to get settled so I can see her.  

Her phone buzzes again but before she could read the message the doctor tells her she can see Fearne. Ashton shows up about an hour later, sitting down next to Imogen as Fearne was sleeping. He sighed and put his arm around Imogen, who finally relaxed now that a trusted person was there. 

“She’s stubborn, huh?” Ashton asks. 

Imogen nods. 

“Hid it so she didn’t have to come here. I’m mad at myself that I didn’t notice.” She reveals. 

Ashton shakes his head, taking his arm back and taking Fearne’s hand in his. 

“Don’t be. She’s sneaky. She always tries to get away with things. I just wish that didn't include her own health.” They explain. 

Imogen sighs and nods, her hands starting to flap. Ashton watches and reaches into his pocket. 

“Can I show you somethin?” He asks. 

“Yeah.” 

Ashton takes the item out of his pocket, a small box. Imogen’s eyes widen.

“Is that?” 

Ashton nods. 

“I’ve had this for a year. A whole year. Haven't popped the question yet.” They explain. 

Imogen’s eyebrows furrow. 

“But why?”

Ashton shrugs. 

“I had it before we were even exclusive with only each other. I just had that feeling.” 

Imogen gasps, lightly shoving Ashton with her shoulder. 

“Well get on with it already! What are you waiting for?” 

Ashton laughs and opens the box, revealing the ring. 

“You know, when I went into the jewelry store, I wasn’t even looking for the ring. I went in to see if I could find a new earring to wear to some holiday party at Nana Morri’s. But I saw this ring in the display and I immediately paused. It was so… her . Even when I asked the jeweler to see it, I wasn’t expecting to buy it. But you see these green stones? They were the exact color of her eyes. So I knew, that this was the ring and she was the girl.” They keep explaining.

Imogen’s smile grew as she listened. 

“Why are you telling me all this now?” 

“Well when I got your call that she was in the hospital, I got this sick feeling in my stomach. Even though we’ve been here so many times with her. I was so, and still am, worried about her. And I realized that it’s time. So I know you’re not her dad, but you are the closest and most dear person in her life. I wanted to ask for your permission.” 

His face was beat red now. But Imogen’s smile was wide. 

She quickly nods her head. 

“Of course! Come here.” She says and hugs him tight. 

Ashton lets out a sigh of relief and starts to laugh. 

“Well shit. Now I gotta figure out how to ask her.” They say, running his free hand through his hair. 

“You just did, you big goof.” Fearne cuts in hoarsely. Ashton and Imogen both immediately look up to see Fearne awake, staring at them with tears streaming down her face. 

Ashton immediately gets up and sits on the side of the hospital bed, reaching over to wipe the tears off of Fearne’s face. She starts to laugh, taking his hand in hers. 

“They’re just gonna keep coming, babe. So…can I see this ring?” She asks. 

Ashton laughs and holds it up to her, and Fearne gasps. Imogen understands, the ring is absolutely gorgeous. Ashton takes the ring out of the box and holds it up to Fearne.

“I’m gonna say the words now, are you ready?” 

Fearne nods.

“Will you marry me, Fearne Calloway?” 

Tears flood down Fearne’s face as she nods even faster. 

“I don’t care if I’m sick, I'm kissing you.” She replies and immediately kisses him.

Imogen congratulates them and quietly excuses herself. She needs to get away from all of the beeping and didn’t want to interrupt their moment. She takes the elevator down to the lobby, holding her hands over her ears for a quick moment of quiet before moving them away when the elevator reaches the floor. 

When the elevator door opens, Laudna is standing there. Imogen gasps before her smile takes over and she hugs the woman. 

“What are you doing here?” She asks. Laudna’s fingers come up and run through Imogen’s hair and it feels so calming.  

“I brought your headphones. You said it’s loud here and I saw you left them on your desk.” 

Tears start to form in Imogen’s eyes at just how thoughtful that was and she tilts her head up to kiss Laudna. Their height difference made kissing Laudna a little difficult, but nothing that going on her tiptoes can’t fix. 

When they separate, Laudna hands Imogen her headphones, which she happily puts on. Imogen takes Laudna’s hand and they walk outside to sit on a bench. 

“Ashton proposed a few minutes ago. Asked me for my blessin’ ” Imogen tells her. Laudna gasps and claps her hands together. 

“That’s lovely! Oh I’m so excited for them!” 

Imogen nods and rests her head on Laudna’s shoulder. Laudna adjusts, wrapping her arm around Imogen. 

“I have to admit, I was quite worried about you when you weren’t at school, darling. It’s not the same without you.” Laudna reveals, kissing Imogen’s head. 

Imogen thinks back to what Ashton told her about his feelings for Fearne. He really knew they were serious when he was really worried about her. Could it be similar for Laudna? 

“You know I’ve been to the hospital with Fearne so many times, you’d think I’d be used to it by now? But I never am. I hate seeing her in that bed.” She explains. 

“Well she’s like your sister. You worry because you love her.” Laudna replies. 

Imogen nods. 

“Be…Be my girlfriend?” 

Laudna smiles and cups Imogen’s cheek with her hand. 

“Of course, darling. I’d love to.” She says, kissing Imogen.

Chapter Text

“Gen? It’s 6:30 are you getting up?” Fearne asks as she walks into Imogen’s room. Imogen winces as even Fearne’s whispering is hurting her ears. 

Her head hurts. It’s like it has a heartbeat of its own. She hears Fearne’s footsteps come closer and instinctually moves over. Fearne gets in her bed and wraps her arms around Imogen. 

“What is it, hun?” Fearne asks her. The kindness in her voice is all it takes for Imogen to start crying. Her head hurts. Her voice is for sure gone, but she hasn’t even tried because her throat is so sore that she doesn’t want to risk it. 

“Can you tell me what color you are?” Fearne asks her, handing Imogen her phone.

When Imogen was first officially diagnosed with autism, she was put into the special education classroom. She didn’t learn a lot there, since she was only there for one period a day and took general education classes the rest of the day. Since Imogen was on grade level academically, she mainly worked with the behavior consultant about how to manage her brain and body. One thing she learned about that stuck with her are the zones of regulation. She learned about the association of colors and feelings and it helped when her brain was screaming and not working with the rest of her body. When she started to get closer to Fearne, she realized that she might have to inform Fearne about the zones of regulation just in case Imogen was nonverbal or having a meltdown. As time went on they decided to pair the zones with emojis when Imogen needed to give more details. 

“ Blue. ” She signs, then types an emoji that looks sick to clarify, then gives the phone back.  

Fearne puts the phone down and puts her hand on Imogen’s forehead and sighs. 

“I got you sick, didn’t I?” She asks. 

“ Think. Yes. ” Imogen signs weakly.

She can’t even get up, nevermind go to work. She has to call in. She hasn’t called in all year. The closest she’s come to it was when she and Fearne had to leave early last week. But miss a whole day? How will she know everything that needs to get done will get done? Will she look unprofessional for not going in? Has it been long enough into the year that she doesn’t seem flaky for calling out already?

“Gen, come back to me. Get out of your head.” Fearne tells her, pulling the weighted blanket onto Imogen from the side of the bed. The pressure helps ground her a bit. She’s still completely dysregulated, but the blanket is helping. 

Fearne grabs her phone from the nightstand. “I’m gonna open the app for you to put in sick. You’re not going in, right?” She double checks. Imogen nods, sniffing back her tears. She’s trying to stop crying, but she doesn’t have much control over herself right now. 

Fearne helps her put in sick, and gives her a kiss on the head. 

“Alright. You’re all set, and it looks like I’m your sub. Are your lesson plans in your drive?” 

Imogen takes a deep breath and nods, grateful that Fearne is her substitute. Fearne hangs out in the library whenever she isn’t assigned to a class so she knows how Imogen runs the place. 

“Okay, so it’s going to be all good, Gen. Make sure you get some rest, okay? I’ll send Mister in when I leave and Ash will probably drop you off some food. Just focus on getting back to your green zone.” 

Imogen nods, clenching and unclenching her fists, trying to find some sense of control with herself. Her crying has finally stopped, and now her body is even more exhausted. 

“Do you want me to tell Laudna when I get there?” Fearne asks. 

Imogen nods. That’s the hard thing about dating your coworker. When you don’t go to work, they can’t come and help you feel better because they’re where you’re supposed to be. The pounding in her head persists, and Imogen puts her palms to her eyes, pushing slightly to try to ease the pain. 

“Hey, try not to do that, okay? I’m gonna leave soon, so I’ll turn your light off and that might help your head. I’ll see you when I get home, Gen.” Fearne says, softly taking Imogen’s hands from her eyes. As she promised, she sent Mister into the room when she left and the dog jumped up on the bed laying down with Imogen. Imogen gives him some pets and then pulls the weighted blanket higher, finally closing her eyes and eventually falling back to sleep.
 

——————————

When Laudna gets out of her car at school, she looks around for Fearne’s car. She was ready to walk Imogen to the library as she did every morning, but only Fearne got out of the car. 

Where is Imogen?

Laudna’s brows furrow and she walks over to Fearne, who smiles softly at her. Fearne herself looks very tired, and a bit preoccupied. 

“Hey, Laudna.” Fearne greets her. 

“Good morning, Fearne. Where is Imogen?” She asks. She doesn’t want Fearne to think that she’s only talking to her for Imogen, but her nerves get the best of her. 

“She’s not coming in today. I may have gotten her sick and she gets very dysregulated when she’s sick.” Fearne explains. 

Oh dear, poor Imogen. Being sick can’t be easy for her . 

“Is there anything I can do?” Laudna asks. 

At this point they walked into the school, signed in, and started to head to the library, where Fearne was taking over for Imogen. Laudna followed, grateful this isn’t a day where she had a class first thing, so she was able to sit in the library with Fearne and Jester. 

Once Fearne puts her stuff down she joins Laudna at one of the couches, Jester sitting with them. 

“I hate when she’s sick, you know? Honestly it’s probably a similar feeling to how she feels when I’m sick, except she usually doesn’t have to go to the hospital.” Fearne tells them. 

“Usually?” Jester asks.

Fearne sighs, and Laudna can tell she’s worried about exposing Imogen’s vulnerabilities. 

“Look, guys. We’ve all become good friends this year and I know you guys are good but…just don’t talk about this to anyone outside our group, okay?” Fearne finally says, and Laudna sees just how serious she is. She knows Fearne is incredibly protective of Imogen. The two of them have been like sisters for years, they’re the closest person to family each has. Laudna’s new to their lives, so it’s very understandable that Fearne still has her big sister claws out. 

“Of course, I would never dream of sharing her business. It’s not mine to tell.” She replies, and Jester nods in agreement. 

Jester has actually been very quiet during this whole exchange, which shows how seriously she’s taking it. She actually seems like she really understands, as if she is familiar with the situation.  

“Of course. I promise I will never talk about it to anyone, not even the Traveler!” 

Fearne sighs, stays quiet for a few moments, then sits up. 

“A few years ago, when we first started living together, we hadn’t yet figured out what helps Imogen when she’s dysregulated. We didn’t even know the term ‘dysregulated’ existed. When she was in school, the behavior consultant didn’t really use terms like that.” Fearne starts, reaching back to tie her hair into a high bun. 

“When she would have a meltdown, she used to scratch herself so hard it would make her bleed. But it was like she could barely feel it until the meltdown was over. Sometimes it would be so bad we’d have to go to the hospital to get them cleaned and covered.” She continues.

“She’s come a long way since then. Now we have a system set and besides extreme sounds nothing really gets her so dysregulated, but when she’s sick her senses get somehow even more heightened. I think she’ll be okay today, but I always worry about her. She’s like my little sister and we’re pretty much all each other’s got. So I just get nervous when she’s sick.” 

Laudna takes this information in and stores it in the back of her mind. Even though Fearne said Imogen has come a long way, Laudna knows that behavior can possibly come back. She wants to be prepared just in case she’s with Imogen if it does. 

“Imogen is very strong, very capable.” Laudna starts. Fearne looks up from her lap. “I’d like to think you played a large role in that.” 

Fearne smiles softly and nods. 

“We helped each other.” She replies, then stands. “Excuse me, I just need to remind Ashton to go to the apartment around lunch to check on her.” 

——————————

Imogen woke to a small knock on her bedroom door. She groans because it took her so long to fall asleep. She then pauses, realizing that Fearne is at work, so who is at the door? Mister sits up from his spot next to her, but seeing that he doesn’t bark, Imogen knows it's someone familiar. The door opens and Ashton pops his head in, giving her a small smile and wave. 

“Hey Gen, how’s it going?” He whispers.  

Imogen thinks about it. How is she feeling right now? She looks at her zones sheet that she keeps on her nightstand. She coughs, her head feeling heavy. Ashton walks over and sits down on the edge of her bed, taking a look at the zones. 

“Oh, I see, okay. What color do you think you’re the closest to right now?” They ask. 

Her headache is making it harder to figure out how to pinpoint her emotions. She tries to concentrate on the rest of her body. It’s not really working. She’s starting to get frustrated now. Her skin is starting to itch and all she wants is to scratch, but she scratches Mister instead.

She whines, wishing it was easier to figure herself out. 

She points at blue, then at yellow. She added in the yellow from earlier because she can tell that she’s starting to get upset and needs help before it gets to red. 

“Blue…sick right?” Ashton clarifies, to which Imogen nods. 

“Okay, yellow. What do you need to help with yellow?” They ask. 

Imogen and Ashton get along really well. They seem to understand her. But one setback they have is the fact that Ashton does not know sign. They want to learn, but there hasn’t been time. 

Imogen starts to stim, her hands starting to flap. It helps, even if only a little, and Imogen can think a bit about what she needs. Her weighted blanket isn't putting enough pressure on her. She needs more. She grabs her phone and types what she needs. 

‘ Hug ’

Ashton smiles. 

“Hell yeah. Scootch over.” 

Imogen lets them in and immediately grabs onto him. Ashton gives her a tight squeeze and Imogen sighs as it is helping . Ashton on one side and Mister on the other helps her feel safe. Her eyes flutter shut. 

“Okay, Gen. Before you sleep, I’m gonna let you know that we’re gonna try to eat lunch soon. Do you want to sleep before or after?” 

Imogen opens her eyes and whines again. 

She’s glad Ashton is giving her the plan but she’s comfortable and doesn’t want to move to get her phone again to type her answer. 

As if Ashton can read her mind, he speaks up again. “Tap my arm once for now and twice for after a nap.” 

Imogen taps twice and closes her eyes again, slipping into sleep not long after. When she eventually manages to wake up again, Ashton gives her some broth to try to eat. It tasted good and the warmth helped her fall back to sleep again. 

——————————

Laudna takes a deep breath as she stands before Imogen’s apartment door. She’s not one to just show up places unannounced, but Imogen has not been answering her phone. Fearne told her Imogen was most likely sleeping all day, but Laudna still worried about her girlfriend. She wanted to make sure she was alright. 

“Laudna?” She hears behind her. Fearne walks up with a coffee and her work bag, looking like she just got home. 

“Hello, Fearne.” 

Fearne looks her up and down. Laudna assumes she’s trying to figure out why she’s there. 

“You want to see her?” Fearne asks, a small smile appearing on her face. 

Laudna nods. 

“I worry. Even if I know she’s with you and Ashton. I just…” 

“Want to see for yourself?” Fearne finishes for her. Laudna sighs and nods again. 

Fearne’s smile grows to full size, and she unlocks the door. She walks in and turns back to Laudna. 

“Do you want tea?” Fearne asks, and Laudna takes that as an invitation to come in. She nods and enters the apartment, taking a seat on the couch at Fearne’s suggestion. The tea is helping Laudna relax a bit, luckily. The last thing she wants is to be stressed when seeing her sick girlfriend. She knows that Imogen just has a cold, but Laudna just wants to be with her and help her feel better. 

“Better?” Fearne asks.

Laudna nods. 

“Much better, thank you Fearne.” 

“I understand how you feel. I wish I could say it gets better but you’re too good to lie to.” Fearne says, causing them both to laugh. 

They continue to quietly talk for a few moments as Laudna finishes her tea, but their conversation is interrupted by loud screaming.

Imogen . 

Laudna and Fearne immediately get up and rush to Imogen’s room. When they open the door, they see Imogen pressed against the wall on her bed, her hands pressed against her eyes. Mister is trying his best to nudge her arms away from her face, but Imogen isn’t letting him. Ashton is moving a bunch of fragile things away from Imogen’s reach. 

“What happened?” Fearne asks. 

Ashton shrugs.

“I think she had a nightmare, she woke up screaming. I was able to get her to put her headphones on but she won’t let me near her.” He whispers back. 

Laudna’s heart breaks as she can see Imogen’s chest heave as she cries. All she wants is to help her. Not knowing if it’ll make things worse, she starts to move towards her girlfriend. 

“Imogen, darling. It’s Laudna.” She says, slowly making her way onto the bed. Mister looks at her, unsure, but eventually moves to the other side of Imogen to let Laudna in. 

“Darling, can you take your hands down? Your eyes might hurt if you keep doing that.” 

Imogen’s heaving pauses, but her hands remain. Laudna looks back at Fearne and Ashton, who both nod to her. Laudna makes it to Imogen, and decides to just sit down next to her. 

“I’m right here, darling. You’re not alone. I’m going to leave my hand right here if you want to squeeze it. It might feel better than pressing on your eyes. Whenever you’re ready.” Laudna is shocked she’s able to keep her voice steady. The last thing she wants is to cause more harm than help. 

They just sit there for a few moments. Laudna holding her hand out and taking her own deep breaths. She eventually realises that Imogen is copying her breathing, so she keeps it going. 

Around fifteen minutes later, one of Imogen’s hands comes down from her face. She hesitantly takes Laudna’s offered hand and squeezes. Laudna doesn’t say anything, but offers a supporting smile. Imogen’s eyes open slowly and she just looks at Laudna for a few moments, takes a deep breath, and then lowers her other hand. 

‘ Thank you, ’ She signs. 

Laudna nods in response, signing back ‘ Of course ’. 

A very small smile appears on her girlfriend, and Imogen rests her head on Launda’s shoulder. Laudna kisses her head, and looks back to the doorway. Fearne and Ashton seemed to have left, Laudna doesn’t know when. She likes to think they trusted her to help Imogen. 

Her thoughts are interrupted by Imogen coughing. 

“Would you like to lay down again, darling?” Laudna asks. Imogen huffs and nods. 

‘ Dream. Bad .’ Her girlfriend signs. 

Laudna points to herself, signs, ‘ Here. Protect .’, then points back to Imogen. Sign is a bit different than speaking, so Laudna hopes Imogen gets what she’s trying to say. 

Imogen nods, then lays back in bed, holding her arms out for Laudna to join, which she gladly does. 

Laudna thinks Imogen falls asleep immediately, but after a few moments, she sees her girlfriend sign one more word. 

‘ Tether .’  

Chapter Text

“Imogen, darling. Can you wake up for me?” Laudna asks, running her fingers through Imogen’s hair. 

Imogen hums as she stirs awake, sitting up a bit. Laudna’s arm remains around her, and Imogen smiles softly. 

“H-Hi.” Imogen whispers. 

“Hello. How are you doing?” 

Imogen shrugs, stretching a bit. She feels better, not one hundred percent, but definitely better. Her voice was back, which was good, but she didn’t want to risk it by talking a lot. 

“Okay.” 

“Are you hungry? Ashton says you haven’t eaten.” 

Imogen shrugs again, turning her head to really look at Laudna for the first time today. Her girlfriend looked beautiful. Her hair was pulled up in a bun, with a clip to hold it together. The clip was black, blending in with Laudna’s hair, but it had a gold chain hanging from it, which stuck out. Laudna had on gold earrings to match and Imogen noticed just how many piercings Laudna had in each ear. 

Without even realizing what she was doing, she reached up and ran her fingers over the earrings, counting the piercings in her head. Six piercings in her right ear, four in her left. Imogen didn’t even have one piercing. Her father never brought her to get them done and when she was old enough to go herself, her sensory struggles were too much to bear. 

Laudna pulls her arm back to sign to Imogen. 

‘Darling’

Imogen’s eyes move back to Laudna’s.

“Hmm?” She asks, focusing again. 

“Let’s get you some food, alright? Would you like to eat in here or in the living room?” Laudna asks, holding up one finger on each hand just in case Imogen didn’t want to respond verbally. 

Imogen thinks for a moment, then picks the ‘living room’ finger. She’s spent all day in bed, maybe she can spend some time in the living room. Her hands clutch her weighted blanket, knowing she wants to bring it. She sits up and finally stands up, gathering her weighted blanket around her. Laudna follows, helps her get settled on the couch and heads to the kitchen. Fearne and Ashton were hanging in the living room at this time, and Fearne smiles at her roommate. 

‘Little sister. Hi.’ Fearne signs. 

Fearne knows very little sign. She knows some basic terms like ‘help’, ‘done’, ‘want’, ‘need, and of course ‘love’. However, she wanted to learn how to sign ‘little sister’ because that’s her term of endearment for Imogen. Imogen had a good cry after Fearne told her that. 

Imogen smiles and waves. She notices that they’re playing a video game, and points to a controller wanting to play. 

“Sure, here you go, Gen.” Ashton replies, handing her the controller. Imogen plays a few rounds of the game with them before Laudna comes out of the kitchen. It’s then when the delicious smell registers and her stomach starts growling. Laudna sits on the couch, handing Imogen a bowl of macaroni and cheese. Imogen squeals and gives Laudna a grateful kiss and immediately digs in. 

Turns out she was very hungry. She just didn’t know until she smelled the food. 

——————————

After a long, relaxing weekend of recovery, Imogen was ready and excited to go back to work on Monday. Luckily she got sick on a Friday, so she only had to miss one day of work. 

She woke up extra early, excited to eat her breakfast and pick out her outfit. When she leaves her room, Fearne is sitting on the couch, drinking her coffee with Mister next to her, chewing on a bone. Imogen sits next to her and starts tapping on Fearne’s leg a bunch of times. 

“Good morning, Gen. How are you this morning?” 

Imogen nods her head a bunch of times. 

“Good. Excited to go back to work. Can you braid my hair today?” She asks. Her hair is very long. She loves it. She also loves when Fearne braids it because it’s out of her face. Fearne laughs and nods.

“Eat something for breakfast and I’ll braid it when you’re done.” 

Imogen nods and grabs a bar and a glass of water. She takes a few bites, not even hungry really, but knowing she should eat. The water helps get the food down, but she gets through half of the bar before throwing it out. She returns to the living room and sits on the ground in front of Fearne, ready for her hair to be done. 

One hair braiding session later, Fearne and Imogen got in the car and headed to work. 

Laudna met them in the parking lot and Imogen happily kissed her good morning. 

“Oh! Hello, darling. In a good mood, I see?” Her girlfriend asks, taking her hand. 

Imogen nods. 

“I hate missing work. I’m happy to be back.” She says, squeezing Laudna’s hand, rising on her toes a bit. When they head inside, Imogen quietly waves at the secretaries, who all smile in return. Fearne informs Imogen that she’ll be in the gym today if she needs her and Imogen nods. Laudna grabs both of their keys and they head down to the library together. 

Jester was already there when they arrived, joined by Beau. The gym teacher looked a bit off, her usual tough exterior seemed a bit wilted. Her shoulders slumped and her head was in her hands. Jester was whispering to her, and her hands were wrapped around Beau’s wrists. Was she squeezing?

Jester looks up at Laudna and Imogen and her eyes widen. She leans forward and whispers something to Beau. This time it was loud enough for Imogen to hear. 

“Maybe she can help, Beau.” 

Beau takes a deep breath and nods. Jester whispers one more thing and then stands, heading over to them. 

“Imogen, can you help us for a minute?” Jester asks. 

Laudna squeezes Imogen’s hand and nods encouragingly. Her girlfriend heads into the office, giving them space and privacy. 

Imogen follows Jester over to Beau, and she sits down in front of her. As soon as she does, she sees the gym teacher fold even more into herself. Beau’s short hair looks very tightly tied back, almost painfully so. Her hands press against her forehead and Imogen’s sure it will leave a mark. Her eyes are squeezed shut.

“Hi, Beau. It’s…It’s Imogen.” 

“I don’t need any help. I can handle myself.” Beau bites out, then lets out a shaky breath that says quite the opposite. 

“I know, you don’t need anything. But if you want, I can try to help you handle yourself.” Imogen offers. 

Beau remains quiet. 

Imogen thinks about what she has observed about Beau. She's tough. She has this overly confident, ‘fuck this’ vibe to her. She’s always with her wife, Yasha. 

Wait, didn't Fearne say she was in the gym today? 

“You know, my friend Fearne told me she was subbing in the gym today. Is Yasha out today?” Imogen asks. 

Beau’s squeezing pauses for a split second. 

“She has meetings at the high school all day.” Beau mutters. 

Imogen nods, even if she knows Beau can’t see her through her hands. 

“Ohhhh okay. I know I sometimes struggle when I can’t see one of my favorite people. It feels very…wrong, right?” 

Beau lets out a laugh, which is confusing for Imogen, but she doesn’t say anything. She wants to see what happens next. 

“Yeah…that’s exactly right.” Beau admits, her hands coming slightly down. 

“Hey, you know what? I think I have something you might like. Is it alright if I go get it?” Imogen asks. Beau nods and Jester replaces Imogen, and Imogen watches as Jester continues squeezing Beau’s wrists. 

She walks into the office to see Laudna drawing on a piece of printer paper. Her arm is covering the drawing, so Imogen can’t peek, but she smiles at the sight. 

“Hello, darling. How is Beauregard?”

Imogen holds up her hand and gives the ‘so-so’ motion. 

“Do you know where my bag of sensory stuff is?” She asks. Laudna points to a purple bag in the corner of the room. 

“You’re great.” Imogen thanks, gives Laudna a quick kiss and grabs the bag, heading back out. 

She switches spots with Jester again, sitting down in front of Beau. 

“In the beginning of the year, I had to bring this bag with me to keep in my office. Fearne and I bought a bunch of stuff for me to use in case I need them at work.” She starts to explain, then opens the bag to show Beau the sensory tools. 

The bag was full of stuff. Imogen and Fearne were worried about not having the right tool so they ordered a bunch of things that Imogen knew she liked or was willing to try. 

“I tend to like pressure when I feel wrong. It helps me feel grounded, more…connected to the world. So, I have a weighted blanket in my office and at home. But Fearne and I also got these.” She says, pulling out two wristbands. 

“Well I tried them, but I learned that having this around my wrists makes me a bit anxious. But I see you like the feeling of pressure on your wrists, am I right?”

Beau eyes the wristbands suspiciously, before nodding slightly. 

“Jessie or Yasha usually help with it. When I’m working out at home I wrap them with work out tape.” 

Imogen holds them out to Beau, who looks at Jester, then takes them. She puts them on her wrists and rolls her wrists around, adjusting.

“They look like normal wristbands.” Beau observes. 

Imogen nods. 

“Yeah. To anyone else it would just look like workout gear.” 

Beau nods and lets that laugh out again. Imogen’s still not entirely sure how to decipher it, but she knows that the first one meant she did something right. Hopefully this one means the same. She thinks yes because Beau finally meets her eye. 

“Hey…uh, thanks. I’m sorry for how I spoke to you.” 

Imogen shrugs. 

“We all do what we can.” She simply replies. 

Beau nods, leaning back in the chair. She looks at Jester, who smiles and nods at her. Beau sighs in reply, leaning up to tug a bit at her hair. 

“I’m…uh…we’re the same.” Beau finally says. 

We’re both autistic. Imogen corrects in her head. She knew about Yasha, she wasn’t expecting Beau as well. 

Imogen nods. 

“How long have you known?” 

Beau shrugs.

“Early twenties. My parents weren't…too fond of making me stick out even more than I already did. Put me in martial arts to try to…fix what wasn’t typical. Got buff, but still autistic.” Beau explains, trying for a joke at the end.

Imogen laughs a bit.

“My dad didn’t want me to be different either. Wouldn’t let me get help until I was in high school. Sorry yours never let you.” 

Beau shrugs. 

“Fuck them. Got out when I could. Just trying to learn how to let myself be…me, I guess.” She says. 

Jester wraps her arms around Beau from behind, resting her head on Beau’s shoulder. 

“Who you are is amazing, Beau.” She says. Beau leans her head to lean against Jester's, and Imogen sees Jester’s eyes shut. A small smile appears on Jester’s face…and a blush?

Not important right now.

Chapter Text

Jester decided to walk with Beau back to the gym, which Imogen didn't argue with. She watched as Jester spoke animatedly to Beau, but keeping her volume down all the same. 

When they left, Imogen met Laudna back in the office. Laudna was still drawing, laughing a bit to herself. Imogen watched her for a moment, seeing how into her drawing Laudna was. 

“Hi, honey.” Imogen greets, and Laudna looks up at her with a grin.

“Come look, darling.” 

Imogen pulls a chair next to her girlfriend, smiling when she sees the drawing. It’s Laudna’s two rats, Pâté and Sashimi. Pâté is wearing a top hat and bow tie and Sashimi is donning a gown. Laudna drew what looks to be a spotlight on the two rats, and they seem to be slow dancing. 

It’s incredibly well drawn. Imogen is amazed. 

“Oh I love it. They look so dapper!” Imogen squeals. 

She watches as Laudna’s grin grows and her girlfriend’s eyes widen and a laugh is let out. 

“I had a dream that they got to go to a ball! I couldn’t stop thinking about it so I had to draw it! I’m sorry I blocked it from you when you came in but I wanted it to be a surprise!” Laudna explains, talking very fast and animated.  

Imogen leans down and kisses her cheek. 

“It was worth the wait. You should hang it over their cages.” 

Laudna gasps.

“That’s brilliant!” She exclaims, taking Imogen’s hand and squeezing. 

Imogen can’t help but smile. 

She thinks about how Jester described Laudna when Imogen first started at the school. She called Laudna ‘scary hot’. Imogen kind of understood the ‘scary’ part. Laudna wore a lot of black, and she had very dark features for someone with very pale skin.  

But Imogen didn’t find Laudna scary at all. 

She doesn’t think she’s met someone quite like Laudna. Someone who is undoubtedly themself no matter what anyone thinks. 

Laudna is goofy and artistic, her voice is like music to Imogen. She is incredibly understanding, no matter what. She’s strong, coming to school even when she has to use her cane. 

She's just… 

Laudna’s everything.

And Imogen couldn’t be more grateful to call her her girlfriend. 

There’s a word floating around in her brain. A very important word. One that Imogen is not quite ready to give attention to because that would overwhelm her.  

“What’s going on in your head, darling?” Laudna asks, reaching up and cupping Imogen’s face. 

Not wanting to accidentally expose her feelings before being ready to, Imogen changes the subject. 

“Have you worked with Beau and Jester for a long time?” She asks. 

Laudna’s head tilts, and Imogen realizes that that question might have thrown her off. Sometimes Imogen gets lost in her own thoughts and just starts talking as if everyone knows what she’s thinking about. 

“Well, Beauregard and I started working here the same year. We didn’t talk much until Jester started working here maybe three years ago? Jester introduced us but we still don’t have many conversations unless Jester is there.” Laudna explains. “Why do you ask?” 

Imogen shrugs. 

“I don’t know. I noticed something when Beau was in here. Jester acts differently when Beau is around.” 

Laudna laughs a bit, which is confusing to Imogen. As if immediately noticing, Laudna gives her a reassuring kiss. 

“Sorry darling, I’m not laughing at you. I’m just laughing because Jester is incredibly obvious to everyone except Beauregard and Yasha.” She admits. 

“That’s got to be hard, to have feelings for someone who is married.” Imogen replies, grabbing her own piece of paper and starting to doodle. 

Imogen doesn’t know what she would have done if Laudna was in a relationship when they met, nevermind married. 

“To be honest, darling. I’m not sure if Jester even realizes she likes Beauregard.”  

Imogen looks up from her doodling at this. 

“What do you mean?” 

“She might not realize that her feelings are more than friendship. That happens a lot, especially with girls who fall for their friends.”

Imogen hums. 

She didn’t have many friends growing up, so she never fell for one. Fearne was her first really close friend, but they had a sisterly relationship. Imogen knew very early on that she likes girls, but her only dating experience was through casual dating. 

Sure, she was friends with Laudna before they were together, but as soon as Imogen saw her she knew she had feelings for Laudna. 

She hopes Jester knows she could confide in Imogen if she needs to. 

——————————

Laudna: Hello darling. Would you like to come to my house today?

“Fearne?” Imogen knocks on her roommate's door. The text she received from Laudna this morning had her feeling a little anxious. 

“Come on in, Gen.” Fearne calls out and Imogen heads into the room. Her roommate was still in bed, sorting one of her many collections. Seeing Imogen, Fearne moves her items away and makes room for her roommate in her bed. 

Imogen hops in and takes a few minutes to look around Fearne’s room. There are little trinkets everywhere. Fearne loves to collect things, from statues to pressed flowers. She’s not as neat as Imogen, but her room isn’t messy either. It looks lived in, in comparison to Imogen keeping her own room very clean. 

“What happened, hun?” Fearne asks calmly. Imogen can tell that Fearne doesn’t want to rush her, which she’s grateful for. 

“Laudna invited me to her place today.” Imogen says, slowly clenching and unclenching her fists. 

Fearne smiles, wrapping her arm around Imogen. 

“That’s good, isn’t it?” 

Imogen nods a bunch of times, still clenching her fists. 

“Yes. I’m just nervous because it’s unfamiliar.” 

She’s happy she’s able to pinpoint exactly what part of this situation is making her anxious. Sometimes her anxiety is so much that she isn’t able to figure it out until it’s passed. 

“I get that. Maybe we should pack your bag with some things that help you in case you get overwhelmed. Would that help?” Fearne suggests. 

Imogen thinks for a few moments, then nods. 

“Yes. Thank you.”

Imogen: Hi, honey. Sure, what time?

Laudna: Oh good! How about 2? You can finally meet the rats!

Imogen laughs at this text. If she had to admit, she is very excited to meet the rats. 

She looks up to see Fearne watching her, a small smile on her face. It’s a smile she’s seen before, but she’s not sure why it’s there in this instance. 

“Why are you smilin’ at me like that?” She asks. 

Fearne shrugs. 

“You look happy. I’m proud of you.” Her roommate simply replies, then gets out of bed. She motions Imogen to follow and they pack Imogen’s backpack with some fidgets and a bottle of water. 

Imogen doesn’t respond when Fearne tells her. Fearne makes sure to tell Imogen she’s proud of her whenever she can. Imogen’s still not quite used to it, but it doesn’t send her into a crying mess any more. 

Once the bag is packed, Fearne turns back towards her roommate. 

“Can I pick your outfit?” 

——————————

“Hello, darling. Come on in!” Laudna greets Imogen with a kiss.

Imogen feels the heat in her cheeks as she enters Laudna’s house. 

Laudna lived in a townhouse downtown. On the outside, the building looked old. Some of the brickwork was faded and chipped and the windows had air conditioners in them, likely because the building was too old to have central air. 

There were a bunch of little things that Imogen could see Laudna added. One of the windows on the upper floor was stained glass. The door had roses on it. The landscaping was eery yet colorful.

It was very Laudna. 

As Imogen steps inside, she takes a look around to see that the inside is also very Laudna. 

There were a bunch of items that Imogen assumes Laudna bought at antique shops. There were candles everywhere, incense sticks, and things that added Laudna’s own creepy flair to the place. 

When Imogen turns back to her girlfriend, she notices Laudna is using one of her crutches to help her stand. It was the type that rested around your arm and had a spot for your hand to grip. Almost like a mix between a crutch and a cane. 

“Are you okay?” Imogen asks. 

Laudna shrugs. 

“I’m alright, darling. Just need a bit of extra help to move today.” She reassured Imogen. 

Imogen nods slightly, squeezing the fidget keychain on her bag, then kisses Laudna’s cheek. 

“Want to sit down?” She asks. 

She watches Laudna’s brows relax. Maybe Laudna didn’t want to suggest it? 

“Of course, let’s go upstairs. That’s where the rats are and my television is.”