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Magnus’ life was officially falling apart. Yes, this was a declaration that Magnus had been known to make on a regular basis, but this time seemed more serious. Well, not serious enough that he wasn’t going to down a few drinks and assume his problems would go away, but pretty damn close. After drinking in his apartment—a generally sad affair—he’d come out to the bar hoping that he’d be able to find someone to make all his problems go away instead, but there didn’t seem to be much promise in the crowd milling around.
Without anyone to distract him, Magnus fell back to plan A and made his way up to the counter. It wasn’t a large bar, just big enough to have a decent dance floor, but not crazy enough to really be considered a club—by Magnus’ standards at least.
Magnus had been in this strange bar/club place for all of ten minutes and he was already liking it. The music was loud enough to feel like a second heartbeat, but not loud enough that Magnus felt like he’d leave with a hearing aid. The lights were low, but not so low that you could go home with someone before realizing what they looked like.
He would have been delighted to find this new haunt, had his life not been—as previously mentioned—in shambles.
“You look like you need a drink.”
For once, the voice didn’t come from a sleazy guy next to him who was clearly just thinking that buying Magnus a drink was the same thing as buying a ticket into his pants, it came from the other side of the bar.
Magnus just groaned, taking one of the barstools and resting his head on the cool counter.
“Or you’ve already had one?”
“Nope,” Magnus said, too loudly, “well yes, but I definitely need a drink.” The drinks he’d had before coming had made him tipsy, but there was no way that Magnus was going to make it through the night without getting hammered.
“Alright then. Any preference?”
“Something that will make me forget my mistakes.”
“I’ll give it my best shot.” A pun, Magnus was impressed.
Barely a heartbeat had passed before there was the soft clink of a glass being placed just near Magnus’ head. He lifted said head off the counter to take the shot and nearly spat it out.
As it turned out, the voice belonged to the hottest bartender Magnus had ever had the privilege to lay eyes on. Quite possibly the hottest human that Magnus had ever had the privilege to lay eyes on.
The bartender turned away, not noticing Magnus’ turmoil and also probably trying to do his job, so Magnus took that chance to shamelessly ogle him.
He was tall, probably not taller than Magnus, but still tall enough that when he stood they would be almost eye to eye. He was muscular enough that Magnus’ mouth watered watching the muscles shift under his black t-shirt. The t-shirt he that matched his hair and made his skin look like porcelain.
“This is the best bar ever,” Magnus mumbled under his breath.
“Is that helping you forget your mistakes?” Magnus’ hot bartender asked, turning back to Magnus, his blue eyes—the most wonderful blue eyes—crinkling as he smiled.
“Something is,” Magnus said, barely aware that he was even speaking. He downed the drink, slightly in the hope that this would impress the very attractive man who’d made it. “But I’m beginning to wonder if I should face up to my mistakes—”
“People usually say that after they’ve had too many drinks,” the bartender smiled, running a cloth over the counter. Magnus shrugged, but took the next drink that the bartender placed in front of him.
“Maybe I’m just being mature.”
“What exactly are these mistakes you need to face up to?”
“I can’t tell you,” Magnus said sorrowfully, “for then this blossoming friendship would be shot in the face like an innocent deer and I would not have even learned your name.”
“My name is Alec.”
“Magnus.”
He held out a shaky hand and Alec shook it, flashing Magnus a grin that was all pearly white teeth and bright blue eyes. Magnus was starting to feel a little lightheaded and he was certain that it wasn’t the alcohol. Well, almost certain.
“I still probably shouldn’t tell you,” Magnus sighed, “I’m sure you get people coming in all the time and confessing shit to you. Isn’t that just part of being a bartender? You could probably blackmail the entire city of New York if you wanted.”
“Actually, it doesn’t happen that often.”
“In that case, give me one more drink and I will tell you my tale.”
Alec laughed and nodded, trading Magnus’ empty glass for a full one. Magnus wasn’t entirely sure what Alec had been making for him, but it was delicious. Just enough alcohol to burn down his throat, but with a kind of fruity aftertaste that Magnus could get addicted to very quickly. He downed the next one, to Alec’s raised eyebrow, and cleared his throat.
“I am bisexual.”
There was a pause. “Congrats?” Alec offered, unsure as to whether or not Magnus was waiting for a reaction. Magnus wasn’t sure either.
“Thank you. So my girlfriend and I got into a very big fight,” Magnus was pretty sure that he was starting to slur, “because she was cheating on me—” Alec made a hissing noise, a perfect audience for Magnus’ story of betrayal. “—I know. So even though we’re technically broken up, I wanted my revenge—”
“Oh no.”
“Oh yes.”
“What did you do?” There were probably other people that wanted drinks, but Magnus seemed to have Alec’s full attention and it was causing a blush to creep up his neck.
“I may or may not have had sex with her ex-boyfriend’s brother.”
“Damn.”
“Well,” Magnus sighed, “it would make more sense if you knew me better. Either of us better I suppose. I graduated university,” Magnus counted on his fingers, “two years ago. Camille’s been a friend of mine since freshman year and when we first met she was dating her high school sweetheart, a gentleman by the name of Ralf. Camille is a year older than me and Ralf was a few years older than her. He has a brother named Woolsey who’s a year younger than me. Ralf and Camille broke up because he wanted to be in the army or something and so she was devastated. She and I became closer because she found that she didn’t have a lot of friends after being obsessed with Ralf for so long—well, obsessed isn’t quite right, they were genuinely in love I think.” Magnus was distantly aware that he was probably making the story hard to follow, but the alcohol had loosened his tongue and he was finding it hard to stop. “There was also a whole debacle with Alexei—a mutual friend of me and Camille, but sworn enemy of the brothers—but that’s not as important. Woolsey and I have always been friends, but then I went to him after the breakup and things just kind of...happened.”
“Does Camille know?”
Alec clearly had impressive skill in the realm of following an unravelling train of thought. Magnus groaned and pulled his phone out of pocket, sliding it across the counter and letting Alec read the texts that he’d just received.
Ragnor: Your idiocy is about to bite you in the ass.
Alexei: i let something slip to Camille… and she’s kind of mad
Alexei: and by kind of i mean she’s on her way to murder you
Alexei: and by something i mean i told her you and woolsey fucked
Catarina: if you’re sad drinking, I’m not coming to save you. Ragnor’s on duty tonight.
Alec let out a low whistle, but couldn’t help but snicker at the most recent text.
“Cat loves me,” Magnus insisted, “she just likes to pretend like I make her angry.” He gave Alec a lopsided smile.
—
Magnus woke up the next morning with absolute certainty that his head had been carved open the night before. He groaned and rolled over.
Only to fall off of Ragnor’s couch and end up face down on his friend’s carpet.
“If you throw up on that, I’m going to kill you.”
Ragnor’s voice came from somewhere off to Magnus’ right and he was just going to assume that he was in kitchen. He replied to Ragnor with an unintelligible moan, hoping that it appropriately conveyed the headache that Magnus was enduring.
After a few moments, Magnus scraped himself up off of the floor and stumbled into the kitchen. Ragnor was there, leaning against the counter by the stove with a cup of coffee. He offered a similar cup to Magnus, who flinched, shook his head and swallowed down the vomit that threatened to rise when he smelled the eggs that Ragnor was cooking.
“C’mon Magnus,” Ragnor sighed, “the faster you have some coffee and eat something, the faster you’ll feel better—”
“No,” Magnus huffed, throwing himself down at the kitchen table, “the faster I’ll vomit on your floor. I feel like my head is going to fall open, like you know when Zeus had Athena she like popped out of his face?”
“That’s not even a good description of what happened, and I’m seriously regretting letting you take that one Greek Mythology course at University.”
“The professor was so hot and you know it.”
“Are you ever going to eat or?”
“I could eat but I’m going to vomit?” Magnus mimicked Ragnor’s tone back to him.
Ragnor sighed again, sounding like the parent dealing with a stubborn toddler. For a teacher, Ragnor had very little patience. But all the same, he put both coffee and food in front of Magnus and didn’t push anymore.
“How did I even get home last night?”
“Huh?”
“Like how did you know to come and get me, did I call you? I have literally no memory of—”
“The bartender using your phone to call me and say that he was growing worried about your general safety?”
“Wait,” Magnus held up a hand, “are you telling me that the very very cute bartender phoned you?”
“Uh,” Ragnor paused, “he had black hair?” He offered. It was a crime that Ragnor would pretend like he couldn’t tell that Alec was a god amongst mortals, but Magnus would let it slide just this once.
“Just fuck me up,” Magnus mumbled, laying his head down next to the plate of eggs, “seriously. He was the cutest and I completely embarrassed myself. I couldn’t stop complaining about the Camille thing and even when we were talking about other things I was probably a hot mess.”
“He seemed to like you,” Ragnor offered again, sounding almost pitying.
“Fucking brilliant.”
—
“I’m surprised that Camille didn’t kill you.”
Magnus blinked in surprise. Despite having made a terrible fool of himself the week before, when Malcolm had demanded they go out for drinks, Magnus had suggested the same bar. And, in typical Malcolm fashion, Magnus was alone within ten minutes of arriving.
“I’m surprised you remembered,” Magnus admitted, smiling back at Alec.
Alec was still looking very cute behind the bar, cleaning glasses and sporting the same all black look that Magnus was beginning to think was mandatory bartender attire. He shrugged and looked down, though his smile didn’t waver. “It’s not every day that cute strangers come in and spend most of the night confessing their problems.”
“It’s not?” Magnus’ mind was on the brink of exploding—he thinks I’m cute.
“Only a few days a week,” Alec teased.
Magnus snorted. “I’m glad to know that I spiced things up for you a little.”
“Do you always come and drink alone?”
“I’m not alone—” Magnus looked around, still unable to catch even a glimpse of Malcolm. “Well,” he ran a hand through his hair sheepishly, “I wasn’t when I got here.”
Alec laughed and put a drink in front of Magnus. “So, what’s the update on your life, still falling apart? Did your girlfriend come after you? Did you face up to your mistakes?”
“Kind of? I got faced and then my mistakes came after me with a vengeance.”
Alec laughed. “Tell me more.”
—
It quickly became a ritual of sorts. Magnus came and spilled everything to Alec over a few drinks. Slowly, Alec began to offer information back, little snippets about his life.
Magnus would have said they became almost friends, though he wanted them to be more than friends. The only problem in Magnus’ way seemed to be that he wasn’t entirely sure if Alec was gay or if he was just convincing himself Alec was flirting back. Magnus had been prone to this kind of delusion before and he really didn’t want a repeat.
“So,” Alec said as Magnus approached the bar, “what happened this week?”
It usually started this way, Magnus would give Alec the weekly update of gossipy goodness and then they’d move on to other things. Their conversation would diverge and digress until it was utterly random. That was when Magnus enjoyed it the most.
“I actually didn’t really do anything this week,” Magnus admitted.
“Why are you here if not to confess all your sins?”
“Maybe I just wanted to see you,” Magnus mumbled, catching a glimpse of Alec’s blush in the low light of the bar.
Alec shook his head, “that would be silly. Almost as silly as me just wanting you to come here so I could see you again.”
“Just ridiculous.”
—
And so, week in and week out, Magnus came back. Sometimes he drank and sometimes he didn’t. Sometimes he’d tell Alec the stories of his life, sometimes Alec would tell him stories, and other times they would talk non-sensical circles until one of them had to leave.
Catarina thought the whole thing was ridiculous.
“You’re in love with a guy,” she said slowly, like she was trying to puzzle her way through, “but you’re not together, you’ve never been together and you only see him once a week when you go to the bar where he works.”
“I never said I was in love with him—”
“You didn’t have to,” Cat rolled her eyes. “Magnus, I know you and I know that you have some pretty damning feelings for this guy—”
“—and sometimes I see him twice a week.” Magnus had quickly worked out the days that Alec worked and sometimes came by the bar again a different day so that they would ‘accidentally’ talk for a little while.
“Don’t you think that you should man up and ask him out? Don’t you think it’s crazy to keep doing this like you’re not falling for the guy?”
“I know that I’m crazy, but I don’t think that changes anything—”
“Oh for the love of god,” Catarina sighed, “I think you should just make a move. If you wait, you’re only going to be more hurt if he doesn’t return your feelings.”
Magnus tapped a finger against his chin, trying to look somewhere that wasn’t his friend. Of course, then he was subjecting his eyes to her questionable decor skills. Her living room wasn’t ugly per say, but it wasn’t what Magnus would have done with the space.
“Are you ignoring me to just stare at the walls instead?”
“Kind of.”
Catarina huffed. “Fine, I give up then. But you can’t come crying to me when you break your own heart because you refuse to just talk to him. I get that you like him but—”
“No,” Magnus said suddenly, “I really don’t think that you get it. I like him so much so quickly that it’s confusing. Normally I do this the other way around, I kiss people and then I fall for them. I’ve never even touched him and I’m basically a goner—”
“Well in that case,” Catarina smiled slightly, “when he does touch you, you’re probably going to melt.” This was her way of calling a truce and Magnus knew it, this was Catarina for ‘I’m backing down, I’ll let you play this one out.’ Magnus grinned back.
“I’ll be a human puddle.”
“I want to make a pun about your name and a puddle.”
“But?”
“I can’t think of anything.”
“Oh no. Give it some time, it will come to you….I’ll just wait until you think of something”
—
There was someone sitting in his chair.
Well, barstool.
Well, unofficial barstool.
But all the same, Magnus arrived at the bar only to find that there was already someone there talking to Alec. Someone attractive and blonde. Magnus was just about to turn around and pretend like nothing had ever happened, but then Alec caught his eye and smiled, waving him over.
“Magnus,” Alec said happily. Magnus revelled in the way that his name sounded on Alec’s lips.
The blonde guy ran his eyes over Magnus. He didn’t seem very impressed, but he did seem very interested. There was something in his gaze that said This? This is Magnus?
Alec saw him watching and his enthusiasm dimmed a little. He looked almost worried and embarrassed.
“Uh, Magnus,” Alec said, gesturing at the blonde person, “this is my brother Jace.” Magnus nodded. Jace had come up a couple times in conversation, only ever briefly and usually in the context of being a best friend and irritating sibling. Magnus was a bit thrown by the lack of familial resemblance, but he wasn’t going to judge.
Jace seemed to sense the question without Magnus ever asking it. “I’m adopted,” he smiled, but not in the soft, easy way that Alec smiled, but more a predatory, hungry look of someone that liked fights—and liked winning fights. “Hence why I look this good and Alec looks like he’s never been outside.”
“I have too been outside.”
“You’re basically a hermit—“
“That’s not even slightly true.”
“It’s like the tiniest bit true.”
When Alec sighed and gave in, Jace shifted his attention away from his brother and towards Magnus. “So you’re—”
“Jace,” Alec said slowly, “say something that will embarrass either of us and I will phone Clary and tell her all about the time that we went to the Grand Canyon.”
Magnus couldn’t quite remember who Clary was or how she fit into Alec’s stories, but the look on Jace’s face said that she was important. And that whatever happened at the Grand Canyon should never be mentioned again. His eyes wide, but his smile still cunning, Jace pretended to lock his lips.
Alec turned at the request for more drinks at the other end of the bar and Jace’s golden eyes met Magnus’ again.
“So, you’re Magnus?”
“Yeah? Why?”
Jace shrugged, glancing at Alec to make sure he wasn’t listening before answering. “He talks about you constantly. I’m not sure what I was expecting, but you’re not it.”
“He talks about me?”
“Yes,” Jace frowned and Magnus realized that what he’d thought was a kind of aggressive look was actually more of a protective one. “Don’t break his heart okay?” Jace said at length.
“And if he breaks mine?” Magnus couldn’t help the question that slipped past his lips, but Jace’s eyes lit up.
“I have a feeling that Isabelle would love you.”
Their sister, that Magnus could remember. He raised an eyebrow and Jace sighed, taking a sip of his drink. “I know very little about make up, but I know enough to know that yours is very good, and I know very little about clothes, but you seem to have the tight, flashy vibe she enjoys.”
“I don't think I'm really interested.”
“I figured. But I figured you’d want to know that you’ll have the favour of the in-laws at first sight—well, our parents might be a little harder to sway with your collection of sequinned shirts.” He smiled over the rim of his glass as Magnus tried to disguise his surprise. Jace hummed for a moment and then shook his head as though clearing it. “I have work in the morning, so it’s probably about time that I turn in.”
“You never answered my question,” Magnus said, “what if Alec is the one to break my heart?”
“He won’t.”
And with that, Alec’s brother gave him one last calculating smile, downed the rest of his drink and walked out the door, mumbling something in Alec’s ear as he walked by. Alec smiled and Magnus could feel his heart in his chest, could feel every single beat and was aware of every one of his breaths. There were times when Magnus felt like he was immortal, standing still while the rest of the world spun, but also dashing about as the rest of the world grew and collapsed around him. He felt entirely disconnected from the people around him, they were all problems and times that would pass.
Looking at Alec made Magnus feel like he was part of the world. He didn’t want this to pass, he didn’t want this to fade. He wanted to be in the moment, wanted to watch time slip through his hands like water. He wanted to destroy the world and replant it with Alec by his side.
It was terrifying.
“You okay?” Alec asked, his voice teasing.
“Get me a drink and then we’ll see.”
Magnus’ head spun as Alec laughed.
—
It would be another two weeks before Magnus gave in.
Despite Jace’s prompting and the constant nagging in the back of Magnus’ mind that told him this would be just as nice in a coffee shop or in his apartment, Magnus put it off and continued to flirt from the other side of the bar. Somehow crossing the bridge and allowing them to stand side by side on even footing would break what they had so fragilely built.
The day that Magnus surrendered seemed to be the day that the fates decided enough was enough, they could not let this continue. He was running the conversation over in his mind, all the things that he could say to Alec, all the things that Alec might say back. It was the kind of disorienting imagining that made Ragnor nervous—Magnus tended to block the world out as he did this and it had resulted in a handful of scenarios when Ragnor had been worried Magnus was comatose and one accident with Magnus almost walking in front of a taxi that could have ended poorly—but Magnus couldn’t stop and by the time he’d gotten to the curb in front of the building he’d planned out eleven entirely separate interactions they could have.
But just as Magnus was walking up to the door, Alec was walking away from it.
This was not one of the eleven.
“I know that there’s not much point in being here if I’m not, but it seems a little early to turn in, don’t you think?”
Alec started at the sound of Magnus’ voice, but he sighed and looked almost apologetic. “It is, but I got a different shift this week and so now I’m done earlier than usual. I kind of messed up our weekly meeting thing.” He rubbed a hand over the back of his neck and the gesture that Magnus had thought to be overused and almost fake was suddenly adorable and endearing.
“We don’t always have to meet over a series of shots and my attempts at a love life, you know.” Magnus gave Alec a tentative smile, hoping in some way that Alec would return it. “We could always, you know, schedule a meeting time during the day.”
“I can’t—“ Alec sucked a breath in and Magnus prepared himself for the worst. Boyfriend? Secretly straight with a girlfriend? Gloriously bi with a girlfriend? Pansexual with an awesome non-binary partner who could totally kick Magnus’ ass? “—I’m a vampire.”
“Huh?”
“You know, one of the undead? I can’t go out during the day—“
“You’re totally messing with me.”
“One hundred percent.”
“I have changed my mind, we can’t hang out in the day because you are a filthy liar and I don’t think that I’m ever going to be able to trust after such a heinous betrayal—“
Magnus was known among his friends for being able to monologue for hours, to drag out a gag like this until it was irritating and beyond the point of comprehension. Ragnor and Raphael had been trading notes for years on the most effective way to shut Magnus up. Well, Alec had found it and apparently the answer was to kiss him.
It took less than a heartbeat before Magnus was kissing Alec back and turning into a human puddle, just like Catarina said he would. Alec’s hand was cold, but it cradled Magnus’ jaw almost delicately. His lips were soft and Magnus could feel every inch of his skin sparking like the live end of a wire. He’d had flings and relationships and loves, he’d fallen in and out of love almost as many times as he’d fallen down the stairs texting—Ragnor would never stop giving him shit for that—but it hadn’t felt like this.
This was fairy tale level stuff, the kind of connection that made Magnus’ knees weak and the entire world seemed to fade into nothing but background noise for the heartbeat that their lips touched. He wanted to twine his hands in Alec’s hair, to pull him forward by the hips and never let him go. Magnus had spent months watching Alec across the bar, thinking of his lips and his arms and the way that he laughed. This felt like worlds colliding, like a change in Magnus’ solar system that could never be undone.
When Alec pulled away all that Magnus could see that the colour of his eyes. His cheeks were flushed and he was smiling, the kind of shy nervous smile that made Magnus want to ravish him all over again.
“That was, uh,” Magnus cursed himself for being so eloquent, but Alec seemed to be at the same loss for words.
“Would it be completely awful if I said that I’d been wanting to do that since the first time you came in?” Magnus’ internal voice was screaming nonstop and Magnus couldn’t form a coherent thought over the noise.
“No, I’ve been dying to get my hands on you,” Magnus blushed, hoping that he hadn’t been too hideously blunt. “I was beginning to worry that you didn’t feel the same. I mean we talked all the time but there never seemed to be a gap where it would be natural to ask you out and not just creepy. Also you were working and I didn’t really want to put you in an awkward position—“
“By just being like ‘hey I think you’re super cute and we should go out sometime.”
“Yeah. Well, are you super cute? Like are you sure? That sounds a little ambitious to me.”
“Hey, I think you’re super cute and we should go out sometime.”
Magnus’ face was on fire. “I’d like that.” He was distantly aware that they were standing fairly close to one another, but couldn’t really be bothered to step away. He didn’t really want to. “This might sound really ‘I’m going to murder you’-esque, but I do know a really awesome twenty four hour diner a few blocks away?”
“That sounds great,” Alec smiled, “I’m guessing you didn’t want a drink before we go?”
Magnus poked Alec’s chest, unable to break the smile off of his face. “I’ll take this one for the road.”
“Are you trying to make some kind of joke about me being a drink?” Alec raised an eyebrow and laughed a little. Magnus could feel the blush on his cheeks, but poked Alec’s chest again.
“Like a tall drink of water.”
“What?”
“Never mind. It wasn’t that funny anyways, we might as well just go back to kissing and pretend this never happened.”
“Fair enough.”
“By the way, somewhere down the road remind me to thank Camille for all this, without her none of this could have ever happened you know.”
“Doesn’t she kind of want to kill you?”
“Oh she definitely threatened to gouge my eyes out if she ever saw me again, but I was thinking more just a really, really lovely card.”
“Some flowers?”
“That would be nice.”