Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

It was another one of caines dumb adventures.

Jax found himself stuck in a tall stone tower, for some reason wearing a fluffy pink dress on, and one of those princess hats that looked like dunce caps.

The room had an, albeit, very comfortable bed, small window, and nothing else. Outside the window was a cloudy blue sky and not much else. Though he could, and would, complain about the lack of action, he did enjoy the bed for whatever it was worth.

(And yes he did try to escape using the window, but embarrassingly the dress Caine shoved him in was far to poofy to fit though, something that was obviously intentional, and not soon after the broken glass had respawned)

Caine had recently been doing more and more adventures closer together, then making them rate the ones they liked more. So having the time to rest wasn’t the worst thing in the world.

Still after he took a (well deserved) nap it got a bit boring.

It was almost a relief when he heard tapping on the small window in the room.

So of course he dramatically made his way to it, finding himself face to face with gangle, who somehow still had her happy mask on. she seemed to recoil at the sight of him.

Jax opened up the window.

“I’ve uhh come to save you” she said nervously climbing in. Jax looked out the window, noticing that she was on her own

“What took you so long!” Jax rolls his eyes.

“The uh… dragon”

Never mind being stuck in this tower was the worst thing in the world! You’re telling him he had to miss out on this groups attempts to fight a dragon, that’d be comedy gold.

Jax still laughed out loud “and how did that go?”

Gangle looks nervously out the window, where a dragon flew by, and some screams where heard “they’re still working on it”

“Well then my ‘knight’, what’s your plan of getting out of here” he said the word knight in the most over dramatic manner possible.

She was quiet for a moment, looking back out the window. “I was hoping Caine put in stairs or something”

“Gee that’s so smart” he rolled his eyes “because I surely wouldn’t have seen stairs before someone came and saved me”

She gave him a weird look.

He was expecting some sort of response to his sarcasm (hopefully a ‘oh- uhm- yeah, but uhm’ and him go ‘you’re feeling dumb now huh?’ or at least something funny). But then a sinking feeling came, so he turned around and saw a staircase that most definitely wasn’t there before.

“Caine sucks.” He was hoping he’d have to throw gangle out a window to escape or something, but now he just looks like a fool.

Gangle and him make their way towards the stone spiral staircase, though strangely it was heading up, which doesn’t seem like it would help for getting to the ground from a tall tower, but Jax didn’t make any comment, just wanting to see how this could all play out.

He glanced at gangle, but she said nothing.

A footsteps was heard, and he stopped in his tracks, gangle followed suit. He then peered around the corner, and saw two medieval looking guards, he retreated. And gangle looks had him, somewhat nervous.

“What is it?” She spoke quietly.

“Guards” he shrugged “don’t worry I have a plan.”

She tilted her head, confused. Before he quickly grabbed her by the waist??? The ribbon waist??? It was more like grabbing a snake by the middle of it.

With her in hand he sprinted up to the guards, to then swing her around to wack them, her happy mask breaking in the process.

After both guards were thoroughly wacked, he let go of her, as her mask (face???) hit the ground it let out a little glass noise, but her sad mask didn’t seem to break so easily. Strange, but he guessed Caine would have no idea what to put under there.

“Jax…” she complained, deflated. He didn’t get what the big deal was, he always breaks her happy mask, you’d think she’d come to expect it!

“What? I got the guards?”

She paused, and stood like she was going to say something, before slumping over, and not bothering to respond to him. “Alright.” She mumbled, before walking up more stairs.

Geez Caine really should’ve made it an escalator, sure it wouldn’t have been time appropriate, but it would’ve been so much easier.

Eventually they reach the roof of the tower, which feels like it achieved nothing in helping them get down.

“Guess we have to jump! Ladies first!” Jax grinned.

“Wait” she mumbled.

Jax did not like the sound of that.

“These clouds kinda look like stairs… a little” she walks to the opposite side of the roof, crouching town to touch the clouds, that admittedly were somewhat stair shaped. “It’s solid”

Jax shrugged with a grin “alright then walk on it”

She looked nervous, before touching the cloud again. “Uhm yeah okay.” It was kinda funny to watch, she hesitated before putting her leg (leg ribbon??? What even do you call those body parts??) onto the cloud, before stomping on it to again make sure it was solid.

Much to jax’s displeasure, she was able to stand on it perfectly fine.

She started walking up higher, and Jax followed.

Maybe he should push her off? Where are they even going anyways?

Maybe when they get to the top he will. but he can’t deny his vague interest in whatever Caine put up there for them (or at least for Jax, after all it’s a part of the tower Caine trapped him specifically in.)

“So, anything funny happened well I was gone” Jax asked.

“No not really” she mumbled.

“Geez speak up” Jax rolled his eyes “c’mon I’m sure something had to have happened!”

“Uhm… they kept calling you a princess, that we had to save.” Her voice started off loud but got quieter as she trailed on.

“Not funny.” He said plainly. Though it did explain the dress.

“Uhm…. Ragatha caught on fire”

Jax sighs, dreamily “if only I was there”

Gangle frowns. Even more so that is.

Eventually they reach the top, which is a flat level of cloud. Jax looks down, you can’t see the ground from here, would DEFINITELY be too bad if he ‘accidentally’ shoved gangle off the side.

Then he looks up and sees a bright red door contrasting the blue.

It says exit, and has a simple icon of a stickman leaving. Strange Caine would make them come all the way up here to return to under them.

Gangle pauses as she looks at this. Jax, regretfully, put his pushing plan on hold.

“I guess this is… how we get down?” She says, sounding very unsure of herself. Jax would roll his eyes and go ‘yeah smart stuff where else would it take us’ but he can’t seem to say anything in this moment.

It definitely seemed out of place.

“Well what are you waiting for cry baby, let’s go in” Jax says, making no effort to move himself.

Gangle nods, walking forward and opening the door.

On the other side is nothing. Well more accurately a black wall, void, portal, thing?? She pauses “maybe this isn’t apart of the adventure” she says, unsure “maybe we should walk back down?”

“I’m not walking on any more stairs.” He says deadpan “as long as there’s not another adventure on the side of that door I think we’ll be fine”

She nods.

“Well scary cat?? Go in” he pushes her, and she disappears, there’s only one thing for him to do, he walks in as well.

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Oh.

His eyes open. The first thing he noticed was a shift in his body, his limbs felt just a smidge thicker, his height, just a bit shorter, his bunny ears were gone for sure, he had hair touching the back of his neck, and he looked down to see his arms where now a realistic skin tone rather then purple.

Oh. Did they??? Leave?????

He was hit with a sudden metal image, of himself, or more so how he looked as a human. How he looked now. And at that moment he realized that he looked embarrassing.

His hair was shaggy and hadn’t been cut in forever, but most criminally of all, it was also, very poorly, dyed purple. He looked like a walking stereotype (aka zooble), of course he remembers the only reason for said dyed hair was because his boss was majorly against it, it was an act of rebellion!! But on first glance it just made him look like a hypocrite.

Not to mention what was he wearing? A purple shirt (with a band he never heard of) with pink overalls? Why did he own that? Why was it the exact outfit he had on in the circus, or did Caine somehow base his looks off of what he was wearing?

He sat there for a moment. Letting everything sink in. The cold from the ground he was sitting on, he felt strange. More solid? More real? Is that what being real feels like. It almost felt as if he’s never felt like this before, like gravity’s weighing down on him.

“Jax?” Oh god it’s gangle. She’s here too, and worst of all she sees him! How embarrassing.

He smiles and turns to her. It’s strange. She looks exactly how he would’ve pictured her, it weirdly enough looks just like gangle despite looking nothing like her. Uncanny. And of course she’s wearing red too. Guess Caine did make them based on their outfits.

“Heya ribbons, guess that didn’t take us to the dragon huh?” He stands up, stretching, he just feels off.

She looks around. The building there in is obviously abandoned, there’s old computers everywhere, and it’s pretty dark and dusty. He vaguely remembers this place.

“Did we? Did we escape?!!” Gangle proclaims, panicky.

“Uh” he looks around “kinda seems like it”

“How?!!”

How was he supposed to know?!! “Walking through that door. I guess pomni wasn’t insane after all”

She looked at him like he was the insane one. And yeah this was pretty wild. But it’s what’s happening!! It seems pretty straight forward.

“Wait Pomni- the others” she looks around before grabbing the closest computer, and shaking it “we have to get them out”

“Okay genius you’re going to break it” Jax point out, somewhat concerned. Yeah they should let the others out or whatever. But who’s to say there even in that computer? Who’s to say they even can “the things off anyways”

Gangle pauses, taking a breath in, and a breath out “yes. You’re right.” She sighs. “This is just so…. Sudden” she sets the computer down. “We still need to help them

“Hey maybe they’ll find the way out on their own!” Jax shrugs.

“Maybe……” she mumbles.

“Well, we should probably head out, before, you know, the building collapse’s or something” Jax says.

“Wait!” She calls out. Looking from side to side.

To his credit, Jax does wait.

“Is that… all?”

What does that mean “uh? Yeah, I mean look around” he gestures around “it’s kinda done.”

“But-…. Yeah…. What’s your name?” She then asks.

Jax was going to roll his eyes and braid her for knowing he shouldn’t know that before a name suddenly appeared in his brain “Andy.” It came to him as easily as his appearance, as if someone had shoved that name into his brain “ew what am I 50? I don’t care keep calling me Jax” who would willingly go by Andy?

“I think… Maggie?”

“Like from the Simpsons? C’mon gangles way better” Jax rolls his eyes. They finally remember the one thing they had lost, and it turns out it sucked anyways, as is the way of life!

“You’re just saying that because you picked it out” she mumbles.

He chuckles to himself “what it fits you.”

“I guess it’s more creative…”

Strange, you’d think they’d both be clinging onto their newfound memory, but honestly all of this felt pretty anticlimactic.

“Well” Jax shrugs “uhh see you” he smiles and walks away. Gangle doesn’t stop him.

So that’s that!! He makes his way out of the abandoned building with ease, he looks onto the street, and just like with his name his mind reminds him of where exactly to go.

Straight the street, take a right, cross the road, pass up the coffee shop, take a left, continue straight. For a moment it felt like he never left, like he should’ve forgotten it, but he still made it to his house.

Well it was his parents house… yeah he still lives with his parents, laugh it up, he works retail. He actually wants you know, a real job, but to do that you have to pay up student loans (buy to win scam or something like that.)

He doesn’t even know what he was planning on being, if there even was any real plan? He didn’t want to be some dumb loser basement dweller, but he hated the thought of every job there is.

He takes a breath in, then out before opening the door, and walking to his room.

At least he’s out of that stupid circus.

His house is just as he remembers it, one of two photos of him, photos of his parents, some bland furniture.

He opens his room and it’s empty. Not entirely, He has a bed, a desk, a computer, a window, a rug, and a curled up nerdy poster on the floor, of some band he liked in middle school. But that’s about it.

It was a far cry from his room, or any room, in the digital world. The darkness made it look more bare, more desaturated.

Maybe this was all a dream, or maybe the circus was, but now he feels tired, maybe this time a little more then emotionally.

So he lays down on his bed, which feels stiffer than before, and goes to sleep.

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Any chance of this being a dream is pushed under the rug by now. Because he wakes up in his room, not the digital one, his real life room. He almost smiles, genuinely.

He didn’t think too hard about it, it was late before, and it all seemed so… unreal. But this is all so strange. A exit door coming out of no where and taking them back to the real world? Kaufmo would’ve never let them live it down.

He would’ve loved being right, being back here. So would…. Eh it doesn’t matter, now he’s suck with the crybaby!

And the others are still trapped, but why should he help them? They scream ‘don’t treat us like we’re stupid Jax’ they can’t get mad at him for doing just that!!!

He’ll come back for them in a week… maybe two weeks, maybe never! Maybe they’ll all get out on their own. But shouldn’t he enjoy this time right now?! Live in the moment?!!!

He has no clue how much time has passed anyways, he doesn’t have his phone on him, he hasn’t had a phone in forever, he just didn’t think about it.

He gets up, not knowing the time. Walking out of him room.

“Andy sweetie could you run up to the store before work?” a voice makes him jump, for a moment he doesn’t recognize it, nor the woman in front of him, but his mind then screams at him ‘mom!!!’

Oh. Right, yeah that’s her, he supposes. Just like the name thing it feels anticlimactic, like he knows this is her, but it’s been so long it doesn’t feel like he knows her anymore.

“I love the outfit, so feminine, the shirt design isn’t the best, but glad to see you finally trying something better” she grins at him. He had forgotten he had fallen asleep in the clothes he was wearing before “Oh the next thing we know you’ll be back in dresses again!”

The irony was not lost on him.

Most of his family was like this, all smiles, and backhanded compliments, he hated people like that. Just one sentence into his grand reunion and these people are already worse than ragatha!

He doesn’t humor her with a response. But it does give him an easy out (going to work) and answer his question of how long he was gone (not long enough!).

“In your dreams” he rolled his eyes.

“Anne haven’t I taught you better than this, and don’t roll your eyes you look childish. Dear.”

A pause “I’m going to get ready for work” is all he ended up saying. Though he had a storm of insults swelling up in his mind, he bit his tongue.

This was real or something. He could get kicked out, and die alone, a loser on the streets, unlike in the digital world, where they were stuck with him.

“Please don’t go to the store in your uniform, you’ll look like a slob” she calls out.

He leaves to his room. Fine. As he scouts through his closet to bring out any clothes that are slightly unsaturated, pink and purple was fine, but that’s the only thing he’s worn for who knows how long! Well in this world it seems like it was an hour or so, but to him it felt like years… years no body else remembers.

Or maybe it was a dream. Maybe his loser coworkers slipped him some edibles and he had the craziest hallucination of his life before slipping away back to his house and sleeping it off! God he sounds like pomni saying it was all a dream.

He shakes his head. Why is he thinking of her?! Why is he thinking anything that has to do with that place!! He’s gone, it’s not real, and even if it was it doesn’t matter, it’s fine!! He’s back to normal now. Just some guy, who has to do adult stuff, like taxes.

He stares at a black shirt. Is that really what he wants to wear? Yeah sure everything was super bright before (in that place that probably didn’t even exist it’s fine, don’t think about it.) but this will make him look emo? Dyed hair? All black, he’d look better in the outfit he was in before.

He then looked at a button up light blue shirt. It was kinda nice? But then it made him look like a corporate fool, which would overjoy his mom (and probably his boss too. Not that she’ll see it)

Who knew picking out clothes was so hard!!! He was just going up to the store!

He picks out a plain green shirt and some easy to put on sweat pants. Sure! Who cares! He was going to change out of it for his uniform soon anyways.

So as quickly as he can he runs up to Walmart with their shopping list and gets all the stuff they need, and gets home.

And man it’s hot outside. He forgot weather was really a thing, but that’s an insane thing to say out loud so he kept it to himself.

After taking way too long to put all the things away (he didn’t remember where anything went?? Why keep bread in the fridge anyways???), and finding the his schedule on his desk (realizing that he has to leave much sooner then he thought).

He returned to his room, to get changed into his McDonald’s uniform (that looked far too similar to his Spudsys one).

Without so much as a goodbye he rushed to get out of there.

Only to go back to a slower pace once he was outside. It’s not like he WANTED to go to work, it’s not like he wanted to stay home either.

His boss is just like his mom (and the rest of his family), if he remembers right. Got super snappy about the dyed hair, uptight about authority and professionalism, smiley and ‘secretly’ hates him.

It’s kinda a lose lose? Isn’t it? Jeez that sucks! He doesn’t even know how much money he saved from this crappy job, but he regrets not caring about it much before. He was always fine with just living in it, silently judging everyone, and not caring too much about changing because he was so used to it. Go to work go home go to bed.

Now he knows the true joy of life, getting to throw someone like that in a deep fryer! Running like a wolf to violently rip an ncp to pieces, stealing keys, using people’s fear against them. All well no one can stop him.

Yeah sure he wanted to go back to the real world. But now it’s boring. And he never wanted to be one of those basement dweller gamers or whatever, but now he kinda regrets not owning any type of shooter game, ripping someone to pieces with no repercussions, plus his family would hate it. He has a computer, but if he tried to play anything he’s sure it would blow himself up.

What’s a man to do without any entertainment!

Work. He guessed.

Like the Spudsys adventure but for the rest of his life. Going home to ragatha but worse 2.0 or something.

Such a sucky way to think about things, isn’t he supposed to be happy he’s out of that circus now? In a way he is.

He pauses looking down the street. It is a bit nice to know everything’s real now, to know there’s an end in sight. And to stop endlessly wondering if being free was even possible.

And why’s he complaining?! He’s great at going with the flow? Staying in a dumb circus all his life would be super pointless, he’s better than all of these losers anyways! He’ll become a lawyer or something, that’d be funny (but too many rules!), he’ll figure it out!!!

So with his, charming, grin, he opens up the glass doors to his dumb McDonald’s, he’s too good for this place, but hey he’ll get out eventually!!! Just…. Work!

Work….

He walks in, going behind the counter to the break room to meet someone in the same (horrible looking) uniform as him.

“Yo Andy, you’re early”

Ewwwwwwwwwwwwwww. Andy??? Gross is that what he’s going to be called for the rest of his life.

“Jax” he mumbles.

“Huh…?” The coworker looks confused.

“Just call em Jax, I’m not 50”

The coworker looks at him strangely, though Jax felt like he was pretty straight forward.

“Alright man, Jacks it is”

“Jax”

“Jax…. Right, sorry dude” the guy says. Jax doesn’t recognize his face, but why would he? He doesn’t remember his name either. “Anyways Ms. Melpo acting real weird, I’d stay clear of her” the guy says.

Ms. Melpo was most likely his boss, though why anyone would make others use ‘Ms.’ For them in a fast food setting is beyond him.

“Weird?” He grins “weird how?” He’ll take anything he can get, he can’t do physical violence (or too much emotional ones without fear of getting fired) but it would be wrong to believe that means Jax is going to give up entirely.

“She’s uh… not talking much, or smiling much” he shrugged “I don’t know what’s gotten into her” the guy looks around “it’s kinda nicer to be honest? But still I feel like she’s going to snap”

He nods. Mind swirling with thoughts on how to make that happen, this is going to be fun he just knows it!

“Well let’s get out there” the guy says.

He follows him out and to the kitchen, going to the stove.

Yep.

Sure was a stove. Behind him being frozen pattys, the ice cream machine, deep firers, and whatnot, he remembered making these.

“What did you do on your day off” his coworker asked.

Going to an abandoned building and getting sucked into a digital world for a few seconds that felt like years was probably not the correct answer.

So he grinned “Probably more than you” it wasn’t mean if it was true!

Still his coworker frowned, not knowing the added context. “Alright.” Sounding only slightly annoyed, jeez no fun.

That’s when he heard the cashier begin to ring someone up, he leaned over to get a view of some older guy, with a crappy looking patriot shirt yelling about not messing up his order.

Jax rolls his eyes “I hate that guy” he then looked at his coworker. Expecting some sort of reaction to saying that so close to earshot.

Instead he got higher pitch a voice behind him.

“Jax…?” wait… wasn’t that?

“Morning Ms. Melpo” his coworker says, forcing a smile, while shooting him a glare “we’re just making that uhhh-“ he looks around “Big Mac!” Jax purposely ignore him.

Because no way.

There’s no way…

He turns, but it wasn’t all in his mind, his boss…. Is gangle?

Her names Maggie Melpo????? Jeez he thought he got a dumb name!!!!

“Jax?” She says again, speaking louder when she sees him fully. Her voice isn’t the overall cheery one like at spudys, instead it’s sad and tired sounding.

“Yeah….” He sighs, matching her voice for sounding tired for sure.

“Uhm yeah.” The coworker looks between them “he’s working today”

“Oh yes of course” she mumbles “it’s uh… good to see you”

This really was like that adventure!

It was not good to see gangle. (Was it though?? All he could think about was the digital circus now he was back, yeah there’s like 2 other people he would’ve wanted to come back with him more then gangle (one that’s long gone, and maybe pomni? She seemed chill) but in total there’s only like 5 people, so beggars can’t be choosers! He can’t deny it’s kinda nice to have someone else here remember the whole deal too. Not that he’d ever EVER tell her that.)

He glared at her. “Sure.”

She chuckles softly. The audacity. Before walking off to leave.

“Dude” the guy looks concerned at him. Jeez does this mean he’s expected to follow gangles instructions now? Gross. “Youre lucky she let you get away with that, don’t test it”

He rolls his eyes.

It’s going to be a long day isn’t it?

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A morning rush comes in, and leaves just as quickly. He does the job, not willingly, but there’s not too much else he can do. Now he lays his head resting against the counter. His coworker non stop talking to him about some nerd movies he couldn’t care less about.

Footsteps come from behind them, but jax couldn’t care enough to look up.

“Working hard or hardly working” gangle then said, sounding like she was trying her best of smile but on the verge of tears.

His coworker pauses “sorry miss” he then grabbed a rag “just uhh cleaning with jax while the rush died down. Right jax?”

Jax wanted this man dead. (Not really, but he wanted to be able to stab them repeatedly) jax makes no effort to move, still leaning on the counter.

“Alright…” she trails off, still awkwardly standing in place “you don’t uhm…. You don’t have too stop talking”

Jeez can’t gangle be good for one thing! The last thing jax wants is to rambled at by this guy.

“Or do something…” she mumbles, more directed at him than his coworker.

“The place empty anyways! What’s there to do?”

His coworker shakes his head repeatedly, which was honestly pretty funny to see.

Gangle frowns “you could help Rowan clean up” she suggested.

He glared at her, she seemed sappy now, but he remembered how she was before on that adventure.

He sighs “FINE!” And snatches up some rag and wets it before repeatedly rubbing the counter “there. Cleaning.”

It’s quiet.

His coworker (Rowan he guesses) seems very annoyed at him. This is what he was waiting for, finally some entertainment.

Gangle just stares at him, looking like she wants to say something but is unsure if she should.

“What is it?” He test the water.

Quiet, then she mumbles “Maybe you can actually clean instead of pretending to”

He rolls his eyes, with a smile “alright then what do you want me to clean”

“Well- I- just the counters, all of them”

Jax looked like he was pretending to think. “Hmm I don’t know, I think I have a better idea” he says before leaping out and trying to put the rag on gangles face instead.

“JAX!!”

“I wonder how many cleaning chemicals where in that water I dipped it in” he ‘thinks’ aloud “maybe it’ll melt your face” he chuckles reaching his arm further to try and catch her.

She runs away, and he’s swift to chase after, she swats his hand away when it comes to close “aww wow, you hurt me gangle” he says dramatically, still trying to reach her face “c’mon crybaby it’s just water” he laughs. Almost reaching her face “well maybe, only one way to find out!!!”

She slaps his hand again but harder, the rag flies out “JAX! I should have you fired for his”

His face falls. Right. That’s something she could do.

“Ughhh” he groans out, before leaning on the counter “that sucks” he then points at her “you suck, you’re boring”

She giggles?!!! Has the audacity to mock a man when he’s down?!!!

“Well” she smiles “the counter won’t clean itself!” Before walking away.

He takes the rag.

Rowan walks by him, very clearly concerned “why’d you call her gangle?”

Jax wants this guy dead.

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The rest of the day sucked, he found his schedule (he doesn’t work tomorrow ‘yay’) and he couldn’t even feel joy as he clocked out, because now he has to go home. To nothing.

Still, ready to get away from Rowan’s rants about marvel he makes his way out the doors as fast as he can, and walks down the street to his home.

He opens the door to his house as quickly and quietly as he can, and speeds off to his empty room, in this boring empty house. He lays down. Before remembering he needs to eat now or something? So uneventfully he makes his way down the the kitchen, grabs and eats a snack, then goes back to his room. And lays on his bed. And goes to sleep.

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In the morning he expects dumb circus background music, and bright colors, and most importantly of all people he can mock and tease.

But instead he’s alone in a blank room. With basically no one. Given his life back, his name back, his body back. And here he is. Lying down, like an idiot.

It’s so quiet, and it’s too dull.

He gets up and stretches. Before stopping and sitting there for a second. Motionless.

He was thinking about things to do. As he normally does in the morning, but nothing seemed fun. He could go to the store, but why?? He already did yesterday. He could look for better jobs on his computer, or collages, but no one WANTS to do that stuff. He could find a crappy browser game to take out his violence, but it would kill his computer. And even leaving this room he’d have to deal with the other people here. People he can’t mess with, not to any great scale at least.

Though… there is someone he can mess with.

Checking the schedule again gangle is working today, maybe she’d want a visitor huh? Better than sitting here doing nothing (and probably better than her sitting at work doing nothing as well!!) win win!

He opens his closet to pick out some tee shirt and dress pants. Despite the struggle to pick out an outfit it was kinda nice to have a choice!

As swiftly as he can he makes his way outside. Walking through the neighborhood, with houses filled of people he never bothered to talk too. Then passed office buildings and stores that he never bothered to go into before. From the looks of it it some nerd shop and tattoo place.

He vaguely remembers the building being there on the walk to work, but he’s never been inside. He’s not interested in going in, it’s just… interesting. The things he’s never cared about, that he thought would always be there.

He thinks about going in, just for pure curiosity, just the knowledge that one day he may never have the chance. But he doesn’t, and instead continues to make his way to the crappy McDonald’s.

The bell rings as he opens the door. And just as he expects there’s no customers.

Not that he can blame any of them, it’s in the worst location, next to the abandoned mall and abandoned office building. No one’s coming this way. It’s also the weird middle ground of not breakfast or lunch (and don’t come at him with that ‘brunch’ stuff. No ones going to McDonald’s for brunch), and there’s a body of a dead roach by the door that’s been there since he started working here. And there’s a much nicer McDonald’s about 10 minutes away (not that any McDonald’s can be considered nice.)

Gangle looks at him. Before making her way to the counter, looking around.

“Jax why are you here? oh wait- did you want to order something?“ Gangle asks him.

“Nope!” He pops the ‘p’.

“You don’t work today?” She states, tilting her head.

“I know” he shrugs.

“So you came to… visit me?” Geez she really flatters herself.

Jax rolls his eyes “call it what you want it, I just wanted to talk”

She looks around, as if scared to get caught (as if she’s not the manger.) she takes a step to the side, to move a bit closer “But I’m at work-“

Jax wildly gestures around “doing nothing! so…” he sighs “what are we going to do about the other?”

“The others?! I didn’t think you cared about them”

“And I still don’t. But I know you’d get all whiney about it, and with us working together and all I don’t want to deal with that” he crosses his arms “so you’re going to have to come up with a plan or something”

“Well… I don’t know anything about computers? Maybe we should get someone?”

“Like they’d believe us?”

She pauses “then we… lie to them???”

“Ooo alright, now you’re talking my language” he smiles.

She seems to get more nervous at that.

“Well maybe… uhm…. Just a little one” she says “we should go back to the building maybe? Before deciding anything, we may be able to find the headset”

Jax shrugs “sounds good to me”

“Alright!”

Great!

…

“Alright…..?” Gangle looks at jax, “is that all… or will you still…. Stay here”

Does she want to get rid of him that bad? Or maybe she’s trying to make sure he doesn’t leave? He chuckles at the thought, before an idea comes to mind “Wow gangle, if you wanna spend so much time with me why don’t I just stay over at your place?”

“What- that’s not what I said!!” Gangle says quickly with wide eyes. But that’s not what Jax heard!!!!

“Ehhh think about it ribbons, we’ll never have enough time in this crap hole to make a true plan, if we’re already going to hang out after work we might as well share a space”

“….??????” Gangle looks at him, looks away, then looks back at him.

“You live with your parents or something” he teases with a smile.

“No…? Jax do you… want to live in my house?” She tilts her head again, like a dog? Or maybe she got it from an anime thing.

“What” he chuckles “nah, I just thought, since you clearly wanna hang out with me so much” he grins “I’m fine with whatever… though, would be funnier to spend more time with you”

She gives him a weird look, like he said something strange. Which he didn’t. Why is she looking at him like that “you want… to hang out with me”

“Because it’s funny making fun of you”

She continues to look at him weirdly, he don’t say anything weird?!!! What does she think he means??? He’s not acting strange, he just wants to see funny things happen to people, and gangle just so happens to be people!!

“You know what, sure. But… uhh… I’ll need to come up with some house rules” gangle said his least favorite word.

“RULES?! Gangle you’re going to make me abstract I swear!” He says clearly overdramatic, before realizing that’s not really a thing anymore “you’re killing me here”

She smiles at him “well alright” she shrugs “I get off at 6 so come find me in the parking lot if you want, and I’ll tell you what I’ve come up with”

Fine. Jax will play nice to these ‘rules’ or whatever. It will be nice to wake up to a familiar face, it gives him something to do (and luckily gangles the most fun to tease out of all those colorful characters).

He should probably go home and pack.

.

.

.

The cars outside his house is gone, meaning his parents must be at work now.

With a bit of a sigh of relief he tries to make his way outside. But the door is locked.

He has to make his way to the side of the house, and struggle to open his window to sneak inside.

He goes inside and shuts the window, before moving to turn on the fan, Jeez was it always this hot in the real world?

He opens his closet to get a big backpack, before scavenging the house for his stuff. He still has no clue where his phone is, but packs his computer and charger, as well as shampoos, toothbrush’s, regular brushes, and all that boring stuff. He sees a bag, and pauses, before getting out his wallet but most importantly a key to this house, in case it all goes wrong, or he forgets something or whatever.

He opens his drawer to pull out the pants of his choosing, he thinks about bring the pink overalls, but decides against it, he spent so much time wearing it, might as well make the most out of not having to wear it.

He opens his closet to pack as many shirts as he can stuff in his bag, before realizing that half of his shirts are tacky ‘professional’ looking shirts, or a black tee shirt.

He reluctantly makes his way back to the drawers and grabs the pink overalls. Most of the pants he picked were black, and he’d rather die than have someone think emo, or goth, or whatever.

Moving back to the closet he takes out one shirt after another. But then he caught a glint of a poofy pink fabric near the edge of the closet, he had to lean inside and push back the fabric shoe shelf to see it in full.

It was a pink dress, puffy, and it looked welly made.

It looked like the one he had on for that adventure.

he definitely didn’t own this before? For a moment he suspected that maybe he mom bought it for him without his knowledge, but it looked to ‘renfair’ for her taste. And too expensive too.

He should’ve left it, but it felt so out of place, so regretfully he yanked it off the hanger and shoved it in the bag.

He zipped up the backpack. It was fair bigger then it looked, if you’d told him that many things where in it he wouldn’t believe you.

He lounges around, double checks, and triple checks to make sure he doesn’t miss anything. And eats some food as he waits for the time to pass

He makes sure to tape a coin on the bottom of the sink before he leaves.

And eventually it becomes 5:30 and he starts to make the walk to his place of employment.

Of course not once did he question weither or not he really wanted to do this until he reached the parking lot and stood next to, where he thought, was her car (it was the only one covered in anime stickers).

Only then did he start to slightly regret not thinking this through a bit more. Yeah it was his idea, and his ideas are always great (9 times out of 10 is still an always). But there’s still that tiny chance that this is a bad idea, not for any doing of him, but gangle.

She was looking at him weirdly before. He honestly didn’t want to know what she was thinking of him in that moment. It could be some dumb rule he has to follow that’ll ruin his life.

But if all goes wrong he still has the key to his parents place. An easy out.

Gangle walks out of the doors.

Chapter Text

She looks at him. Giving that weird look again, as Jax has to tell himself he has everything all under control.

“I’m guessing this is your car” he grins.

“…yeah” she mumbles, getting out her keys.

“Figured you where the only one working here with a shadow the hedgehog magnet”

She frowns. Opening up the driver door “I came up with some house rules”

Jax opens the passenger door, and gets in the car. “Alright”

She turns the car on, and begins to pull out. “First things first no pranks, no making fun of me, and we have to split rent”

Annoying.

“You can have the guest room”

“Guessing it doesn’t get much use” Jax grins.

“Jax” she warned.

“You said no making fun of, not no teasing, c’mon that’s just teasing” he smiles.

She shoots him a glare.

“You can’t ask me to give up my personality, that’s cruel”

She sighs “alright… I think that’s it, no uhhh… eating my food, or breaking my stuff or anything like that. Caines not here to replace it anymore so you know… I’ll make more rules if I need too”

“More rules?!” Without even telling him first? It’ll definitely make finding loopholes more difficult.

“Only if I need too, just don’t give me a reason to and you’ll be fine”

Easier said than done.

The house looked fine from the outside, one story, pretty small, it matched all the houses next to it. White with a bright red door.

“I’ll make a copy of the key for you” gangle says, putting her hand in her purse.

“This key?” He grins and lifts up said key, which he had sneakily snatched when they were walking up to the door.

Her eyes goes wide as she pats her purse and looks around “how-“ she sighs “what did I say about pranks…”

“That’s not a prank ribbons! Just a tease, a light joke” he smiles and unlocks the door for her, she snatched her keys back, then walked inside.

He followed suit, locking the door behind him, she turned on the light.

And what he saw….

Was VERY funny. “Oooo-“

“-don’t!!” She immediately shoots back at him.

“It’s a LOT of figures gangle” he smirks “I wonder if you’ve-“

“LEAVE”

“Geez nevermind ribbons, show me where my room is” Jax shakes his head.

The living room was small, and pretty colorful, nothing like his house, there was the usuals, couch, tv, a shelf, but it was the amount of anime figures on the shelf that made him laugh. He turns his head to see a poster for another anime thing that he’s never heard of, he chuckles to himself. This was already a wonderful choice.

She walks down the hall and points at a door, he walks up and opens it without waiting for her to do so.

It’s seems like the plainest room in the house, which isn’t that out of place for a guest room (he didn’t want anime memorabilia watching him sleep anyways!).

Still the blankets were a pinkish purple type color, and there was a matching bedside table, the curtains were a purpleish blue. And on the wall was a full length mirror with a flowery rim that looked like it was right out of a child’s room.

It was all brightly colored and cutesy, not overly so, but way more than his room, and all of his parents house.

It wasn’t as saturated as the circus had been, but he didn’t notice him start to slightly miss having more colorful rooms until he walked into gangles house.

“Looks like a children’s room” he smirked at her.

“Well it’s yours now, you can unpack and get settled” she said “have you eaten anything yet”

He had for lunch, but that’s was a while ago at this point. So he shook his head.

“I’ll order take out, pizza good?”

It was fine, he nodded, then took off his backpack to put it up against the bed frame. Gangle had closed the door behind her.

He opened the bag, and started to put away the clothes, hanging up the shirts in the closet, and putting the rest in the drawers near the bottom of the empty guest closet- his closet now he guesses.

It’s just for however long he decides to stay here.

He can’t help but wonder if his parents wonder where he is. They probably think he’s working today. Or maybe they’ll think he’s all cooped up in his room. He wonders how long it would take.

He sits on the bed, it feels a little bit softer then his was.

It feels strange, he wondered about his parents before, when he first joined the circus. He would spend hours wondering where everyone thought he was, if they noticed he was gone, if his boss was mad he didn’t show up for work, if his mom missed him. He wondered about people whose names he’d forgotten, who he takes too once or twice, if they’d remember he existed and would feel confused by his absence, maybe even sad.

Then time passed by, and he was in the circus for longer and longer. And eventually it kinda wore off. He couldnt remember the faces of his coworkers, the names of the people he had gone to school with, or the cashier of the store right next to his house. He hated his boss, and his parents.

And more time passed, and he stopped caring. He didn’t even think about it.

Now he’s back, and there was no grand reunion, no one noticed, they weren’t even given the choice of noticing.

And he bearly cares. He could never see his parents again, his old coworkers, friends from school. And he wouldn’t bat an eye.

He likes being in the real world better, obviously, they all wanted an exit door. But now something that before caused him so much distress, something that should cause him at least a little discomfort. He doesn’t care about.

But leaving gangle.

…

He laughs.

He couldn’t really care if gangles here or not! He just likes her here better than not? Just because she’s funny to poke fun at!! Just because he’s spent what felt like a year give a lot, or take a lot, with her in the same environment it just feels weird without her!

He guesses there would’ve been no way his boss could’ve gotten mad at him, even if the time passed!

Should an employee and boss be roommates, definitely not, does he care? Definitely not!!!

It is funny to think that if all that time really did pass and they lost their jobs gangle and him would’ve probably never put together that she was his manager. Hey maybe it would’ve been better that way-!!!

Still it’s not that bad.

He smiles and lays down.

It’s not bad at all! He’s got a place, a job, someone he knows, who’s funny and he can mess with.

And to think for a moment he almost was missing the circus?! Him?!!! That thing??? C’mon! Non of it was real, and it was trapping them the whole time. It does feel better to be free.

A knock on the- his(!) door.

“Come in!!!” He sings out.

Gangle steps in “pizzas here, I didn’t know what you want so I just got cheese.”

“Didn’t even bother to ask! Wow, what a rude host” he stands up and shakes his head, following her out to the kitchen.

“Unless you wanted to pay extra for toppings stop complaining”

She shows him where the plates are and gets ranch out of the fridge.

Honestly the pizza doesn’t smell half bad!

“I’m going to watch tv well I eat… uhm if you want to join me or something”

“Sure! Why not” sitting off to the side while gangle watches tv doesn’t seem like the most fun experience.

They make their way to her couch, it has a blue cover, and definitely looks worn.

She reaches for the remote “I missed watching shows, anything you miss?”

“Me? Nah… not really, I don’t care for tv much” he shrugs.

“Really? You don’t have a favorite show?” She asks.

“I’m not a nerd like you, I’m not like… in ‘fandoms’ or whatever. I watched breaking bad I guess, the office? Just whatever was on tv” he points at her, accusatory.

“Hmm that’s too bad, I was going to let you pick out something” she lightly smiles at him “but since you don’t care I’ll just-“

“No no!! Wait let me pick out something” he says, starting to lean over to try to grab the remote.

But she moves it away “I thought you said you didn’t care” she smiles. oh!!! She knows what she’s doing!!

“Let me at it, I’ll put on saw” he grins. Making another wild move to grab the remote.

“No!!!” She moves the remote away from his hand “not while we’re eating!!!”

She clicks on the remote, still avoiding his hand trying to grab it, then she clicks on something and throws the remote to the other side of the couch.

“There!!”

He was met with cheery music, and singing in what he assumes is Japanese, looking at the screen plays overly cute visuals, as the title reveals a show called ‘squid girl’.

“You did not just make this what we’re watching” he rolls his eyes.

“If you really don’t care I think I should get first picks!” She smiles at him. “It’s a cute show! I think you’ll like it”

“Well it’s definitely cute.” He says in a somewhat sarcastic tone. As for liking it, he doubts it.

He sits and watches the episode

Eating his pizza, it’s off, he noticed this with all of the food, but this is the one time he really stopped to think about it.

It’s almost the same as the food in the circus, just the flavor is a little more saturated, and the texture is a little softer and more googey. It was so similar, but just different enough for him to notice.

“She’s mean, like you” gangle smiles, gesturing to the tv, pointing at the blue haired girl.

The character did seem a bit mean, but in a more childish manner, he felt like this was meant to be an insult. So instead he said “she’s funny like me too” with a smile.

“Oh so you think the shows funny” she said immediately, she was definitely planning that.

Dang it.

“Tch, it’s funny how bad it is”

Gangle gave him another weird look, as if she didn’t believe him, and yeah, alright it wasn’t the best come back, but he’ll think of something better soon enough!!!

Soon enough the episode and food is done, he throws his plate in the sink, and heads off to his new room to go to sleep.

.

.

.

He wakes up with the sun on his eyes, the room somehow seems more saturated then it was yesterday, still nothing could beat the digital circus.

And suddenly his mind rushes with ways to mess with gangle, and it’s a tad nice to know he now can do all those things.

He gets up with ease, and leaves the room, expecting to see gangle on the couch watching some crappy show, instead he was met with a cat on the couch (not watching anything obviously.)

Gangle didn’t tell him about a cat, but honestly it fit her well to have one. He approached it, and it continued to sit there.

“Hey” he said, pretty normally, he never really understood baby talking to animals, it mostly just made a fool out of people.

The cat looked at him, and meowed. It then continued to stare at him, not doing much else.

Clearly they’re not as scared as gangle, so he approaches, the closer he gets the cat stands up, and does a big stretch, then leaned forward to nuzzle against his hand.

Strange, he always assumed all cats were scared, or mean. But this one didn’t seem like either.

Petting the cat he found it had a red collar on, with a tag that said ‘mamas boy’ on it.

He laughed. So Gangle is the ‘furbaby’ type of person huh? That makes even more sense.

Truth be told he didn’t care to hang out with the cat, so instead he took a quick glance around the house, though gangle wasn’t in the kitchen or the hall.

Which meant one thing. She was in her room.

Jax could guess what door was hers, it was the only room she hadn’t shown him. So he goes up to it and knocks, he’s evil, not heartless!

Not a second later “oh! Come on” he hears gangles nervous voice shout.

So he opens the door. She’s sitting on her bed, sketchbook in her arms.

But of course that is not the very first thing Jax noticed, because this room makes the guest room feel professional. Of course the first thing he noticed was the sonic the hedgehog blankets. He couldn’t even stop himself from laughing.

The rest of the room was filled up with shelves and with even more anime figures then he could dream of (he recognized one as the girl from that show she put on yesterday, and recognized a few others from video games.) there was a desk with a blue chair- and on closer look the chair is ALSO sonic branded. She has LED lights on her wall, and a mountain of plushies on the bed beside her.

Overall the rooms pretty tidy (for an anime fan).

He stood there for a while chuckling to himself.

“Jax…..????????”

“Sorry gangle” he laughed, definitely NOT sorry. He tried to finish his sentence, but he exploded in another laughing fit.

“Alright it’s not that funny.” She mumbles.

He wipes a fake tear from his eyes “it kinda is” he walks in.

“Is there something you wanted…?” She asks.

“Nah, just wanted to see how my favorite crybaby was doing”

She gave him that strange look again.

“Saw the ‘mamas boy’” he grinned.

Her face went red “oh yeah Artemis….. you’re ok with having a cat right?… I kinda forgot to tell you…”

“Yeah it’s fine, that just means I’ll blame stuff on the cat when I knock things over”

Gangle sighs “oh god I don’t need two of them…”

Jax laughs, despite the ‘mama boy’s friendly demeanor it seems he still caved to the cat urge to knock stuff down. This will be so much fun “by the way what type of name is Artemis? It an anime thing”

Gangle paused. “Sailer moon…” that checked out, but he thought that show had a black cat… named something else.

But what did he know! Looking around the room Jax was very sure that gangle knew more about that this stuff than him.

“Uhm…. The WiFis been down… or just slow, here, so I’m just drawing”

“Oh really? Didn’t even notice, guess that’s cause I don’t spend all of my life online” he teased.

She frowned.

“What are you drawing??” He asked.

“You can’t rip it”

“I didn’t say I was going to rip it ribbons, I said what are you drawing?” He rolled his eyes, just because he always does the worst doesn’t mean you should expect the worst from him! Wow he’s hurt!!! (Not really of course).

“Uhm….” She looks down at the drawing, before moving the sketch pad to show him.

It’s a character he doesn’t recognize, in a typical anime style.

Honestly he’s not even surprised at this point.

He chuckles, but this time more for show then genuine. “Alright nerd, anyways I was thinking after work we could go back to the building”

She nods.

.

.

.

The rest of the day was pretty uneventful, getting ready for work, tiding up his new room, it was kinda nice to be driven to work by gangle though (even if it meant he had to come in a little earlier, normally it takes him around 30 minutes to walk there, so it’s not that bad of a situation).

And work was… quite. Luckily for him Rowan wasn’t there today, some other kid, probably a high schooler, who seemed too nervous to not be on task. He thinks they purposely took a long time to clean so they’d have more things to do, and look like they’re doing work. But it doesn’t really matter anymore.

Gangles just as, if not maybe more nervous then them at the moment. (Which honestly is a surprising relief, he did NOT need another spudsys incident).

Which for most of the day left him alone at the register, gangle was emailing ‘important people’ or something, so there wasn’t much to do.

Eventually the end of gangles shift came and they both walked back to her car.

Stepping inside “should we stop home first or…?”

“Nah, let’s get this out of the way” Jax said, she nodded.

The office building wasn’t that far from their work, it only took a few minutes and they arrived.

Getting out of the car, and hopping the (very small) fence, they were back in. Easy as that.

The place was dirty, and mostly empty, there were rooms like mazes, some with desks and computers, but most of the computers had cracks on them, one even shattered on the floor. There was fallen down chairs, tables in half.

Eventually they reached the room they both remembered. A perfectly in shape computer, table, and chair, albeit a bit dusty.

There was no headset anymore.

Gangle approached it, looking around the computer “there has to be an on button…. Something we missed?”

Jax walked closer too. There was a little light on the bottom, it was red, but pressing it nothing happened. It seemed to be just a light indicating that it was off. Which was very unhelpful, they could tell it was off.

There was a box next to it, the source of the computer, but still no buttons, not in the front, on the side, even on the top. There was a vent looking thing on it. But nothing to turn it on.

“Maybe we need to open it up?” He suggested.

“What if it breaks it? Then what would happen to everyone?”

He hated that it was a good question. When they were trapped in there where they one storm away from being deleted? Of the table crashing down just like all the others and breaking the digital circus?

“It’s a game right? There’s got to be a disk in there for it?”

Gangle looks at it “I know people can… or should uhm… be able to transfer vr games to regular pc… do you think that would still suck them in the circus or”

It felt like it wouldn’t? After all people made the game right? Someone had to have made Caine, and it’s not like you could control anything once inside there. Unless they imported him from something else and that person abstracted.

It was hard to say. “There’s only one way to find out?” He shrugged. “Let’s take it”

“Wait- we don’t know what unplugging it will do!!” She says.

And it maybe would’ve been a good concern. But the computer wasn’t plugged. It didn’t even have a wire. He looked all around that box the only thing on it was a vent looking thing, and the other a light.

“There’s no plug smart stuff” he rolled his eyes.

“Are we… sure we have the right computer?”

Jax was pretty sure. He remembers this is the exact place they appeared outside, that this was the place the headset was, sitting on the desk that he tried on.

And most of all he’d hope this is the right place. Because every other computer is shattered to bits.

He just shrugged.

Gangle looks around, in thought. She’s probably thinking the same thing (or jax is giving her too much credit).

She then moves her hands around the computer “at least help me carry it”

“Nah you’re strong you got this” he grins.

“Jax…”

He laughs, giving her a hand with the computer, it’s not as heavy as he thought it would be.

They bring it as carefully as they can out to the car and put it in the back seat.

With that they drive back home.

Opening up the door they carried the computer into the house, setting it on the nearest table.

“I hope they’re okay” gangle mumbles.

“I don’t think just moving it’s going to break it” he said. He wasn’t an expert or anything, but it’s in the same condition it was when they got out, it’s just less likely to crumble into dirt now.

So with not much else to say they both go off on their own to go into their rooms. Feeling pretty tired, he opens his door, and plops down on his bed.

They’ll find some loser to emulate the game or whatever it’s called. Then they’ll use that same loser or find some other nerd to program in a message for everyone, make a deal with Caine, or go behind his back. Maybe the exit asset is somewhere they can reach. After all if Caine can edit the digital world, why can’t they?

Someone had to have made the game in the first place.

A thought crossed his mind.

And he closed his eyes harder, trying to banish it.

But still, he HAS to wonder.

What would happen if an abstraction was pushed through the exit doors.

if no time had truly passed… are their body’s somewhere, would they wake up like him and gangle. He didn’t want to get his hopes up, but he really couldn’t see why not?! It’s not like they’re dead, they couldn’t die in the circus, it was a whole thing there!

Maybe their minds would be corrupted, maybe they’re too far gone, they’d be a husk of what they where before.

It was pointless to think about. But still he couldn’t help it.

He didn’t get much sleep that night.

.

.

.

He awoke to knocking at his door.

“Ugh…. Come in” he opened his eyes, before shutting them again, geez the windows light was RIGHT in his eye.

He opened his eyes again as he heard the door open.

Then came in gangle, bright eyed, soft smile, with neat hair, wearing a cropped anime shirt, and a skirt.

“Geez why are you up so early???” He asked, not only was she up, but fully dressed and ready for the day? He swears they all normally wake up at the same time (Caine didn’t like sleeping in).

“I uh couldn’t really sleep” she says “but I found a place to take a look at the computer!” She smiles.

Okay so not only did she LOOK ready for the day, she was ready. He feels lazy now! What a show off.

He sits up, “alright”

“I was going to head back there with the computer maybe… I thought you’d like to go with”

“Yeah yeah, gotta make sure you’re not dooming everyone and everything” he said “let me get ready”

She closed the door. And he got on his classic plain teeshirt with pants look.

He then exited the room and met up with gangle (not before giving the ‘mamas boy’ a little pet.) they took the computer into the car and gangle drove to whatever place she was talking about.

Jax recognized the outside of it, it was the building that he passed when he walked to work, the nerd shop.

He didn’t want to be caught dead in there, but from the window (having a bunch of retro video games, old tech, anime, toys) he can’t deny it does seem like the type of place that would have people who know how to do stuff with old games.

“Of course this is the place you pick” Jax said.

“If it works it works” she sounded a bit unsure, but still they got out of the car, old computer in hands.

Jax uses his back to open the door as they shuffle in.

Immediately an employee (who was wearing a shirt with some old video game character he may recognize (he thinks it’s crash bandicoot? Or star fox, he doesn’t know their names) instead of a uniform) walks by them and takes the computer. Jax has to assume this is the guy gangle was talking about before who could help them out.

“Wow! Quite an old computer” they said “and the games inside?” They asked.

“Yep!!” Gangle smiled, though still saying it somewhat nervously.

They set it down “And you get it out by….?” They looked around the computer, clearly running into the same issue.

“If we knew we wouldn’t have brought it here” Jax says.

“Right…”

“It was uhh… gift… by-“

“My great grandpa” Jax then says dramaticlly “big nerd that guy, he made a game, we’re nerds too so we wanna see what it’s all about, right ribbons?”

She looks nervous. But the employee just laughs, clearly missing his sarcasm “hey no worries, we’re all nerds here”

“I can tell-“ Jax said.

“Anyways! We need to get the game out without uh… ruining it” she cut him off, how sad! It was just getting fun.

“You mentioned it being vr too? I have a headset in the back, so you two could try-“

“No thanks—!!!” “Nope.” both gangle and Jax immediately said at the same time.

“Alright…” they said “just get it on the pc then”

“Yeah! That’s good”

“Well it will take a while to get it out, and transfer it all, come back in a week I’d say and I’ll update you”

“Alright” gangle smiles.

So then… that’s it.

With that they make their way out of the store. Jax walking a little faster not wanting to be caught around this junk.

Gangle sighs when they reach outside.

And Jax kinda gets it, he likes not having to worry about it. But leaving all that in one persons hands, without knowing what they’re going to do is… strange.

He could care less if that person misses their warning and gets sucked into the circus, even if they accidentally delete Caine, or something. And he’s not worried about the others either, but like, he doesn’t care for them, he wouldn’t even argue about hating them, still he guesses he doesn’t want them to die… or something.

And if there’s a chance an abstraction could be brought back….

All of it was dumb to think about. He can’t control if this guy gangle gave the computer too kills everyone!

What happens happens, or whatever.

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He and gangle went to work later that day. Today was busy, why he couldn’t tell. But they were both pretty wiped when they got back home, ate something small and went to sleep.

.

Gangle had to open the next morning and Jax, not wanting to continue to walk to work, woke up at the crack of dawn to go with her.

No happily of course, but the time passed by quicker then he thought it would’ve. He didn’t talk to gangle much that day (though Rowan wouldn’t leave him alone).

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The next day came and went, and so did the next. Work taking up most of their time, and every conversation with them was something like ‘how’d you sleep’ or ‘time for work’ ‘what do you want for dinner’. Jax of course tried to make the small talk more interesting, but it was pretty hard to do when they both had task after task at work.

It seemed like the next day was going to be the same, they woke up, work did its thing, and then went home.

They made dinner, watching an episode of that dumb anime gangle made them (she still wouldn’t let him get the remote).

That’s when they realized they both closed tomorrow, and got in pretty late too.

“I guess we could stay up” she had said. Normally after the boring episode they’d head right off to bed.

“And do what? Play dolls.” He smiles “ah shoot we can’t” he says sarcastically “because someone refuses to take them out of the box”

She pouts “they’re collectors items”

“So you didn’t get your sonic figures from the toy section of target?” He smirks.

“Some of them are from toys-r-us” she says, as if that’s not more ridiculous. “And I own a few of the jazwares ones”

“…and that means??” Jax asks.

She crumbles into herself “well… they work with uh… jakks pacific now… so they don’t make those ones anymore” sounding more embarrassed as she speaks “the black knight one I own goes for around 100$ and that’s outside of the box”

“Geez… I forgot there’s a bunch of nerds out there” he sighs. The worlds more doomed then he thought.

“But uhm… I was going to play animal crossing”

“Ugh you would, got any first person shooters?” He asked, yeah he was no basement dweller, but forgive a man for missing a little light hearted violence! “You know, call of duty, fortnight, metal gear solid… the other ones??” Of course he was somewhat serious on wanting to play a more action packed game, he very obviously picked games that only dude bro type people played, just to see how gangle would react.

“…I have metal gear solid” oh.

That was so much more interesting.

He laughed “really? What you play league of legends too? Are you a Redditor? Don’t answer that I’m scared you’ll say yes” he laughs.

“Well mgs-“

“Don’t say ‘m’’g’’s’ you’ll sound like an even bigger nerd” he for sure thought people only type that because their lazy! Next thing he’ll know is people saying lol in real life or fnaf or whatever. Makes them sound like a snob!… wait do people do that???

“It’s a fun game” she says, somewhat sternly “it’s- well why don’t we just play it” she gives him a light smile.

Which he can tell immediately means that this game is nothing like he’s imagining it. (He didn’t know anything about ‘mgs’ (or really any video game) other than it was a game where you shoot people and there’s like war or something?).

He never really played any video game. He always thought he was above it, but that’s just because the only thing he really saw online was ‘cringe fandoms’ and his mom always acted like it was the scum of the earth. Thinking about it she would hate him doing this, which did kinda make him wanna try it (though thats the reason he wanted to put that headset on, and that didn’t really end well).

Gangle stands up to put the disk in her PlayStation, and turn it on, taking a controller she logs in and picks the first metal gear solid game.

“Wow, the graphics are somehow worse than the circus” he smiles.

“Oh hush, it’s from the 90s”

Jax didn’t know 3D games were that old. Honestly that thought seems stupid now, but he didn’t know much about them.

“I guess no one from the 90s knows what humans look like… hey you’re from the ‘99 right? That explains a lot”

She paused “what does that even mean…?”

He doesn’t elaborate. Whatever she thinks in her head is a worse insult then then it really is (what it really was in fact was him just saying words, and trying to imply an insulting meaning to them through tone alone).

They played through a lot of the game, with gangle showing him the controls and letting him shoot all the people he wanted.

He’d hear gangle laugh as the main character kept giving him calls that where just ‘this is a stealth game, try not to get caught!!’ While he’d immediately ignore it and shoot everyone in the room down (and then die.)

A few things he realized about the game is that it was far less serious then he thought, and weirdly anti-war despite how cool it makes it look (how was he supposed to know there was a pacifist route gangle-! He thought that was just an undertale thing?!).

Eventually the time came (around 2am) where gangle said “alright we should call it a night”

“You’re no fun” Jax poked at her, though honestly he was pretty tired. Caine always had a set bed time and wake up time for them (even if it wasn’t directly said). He’d dim the circus and close down most of it at one time, and expect them to get up bright and early the next day…

Well it was early here that he was used to waking up, but time wasn’t really a thing in the circus. The only way for it to be late was for them to get tired and have the lights dim. But according to how this sleep schedule affected him in the real world he started getting tired at 8 (8??? 8 is so early Caine- why would he do that??) and wake up around 5 (which is also so early, what is wrong with that ai).

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Days came and went, and it wasn’t long until a week passed. They had a good thing going. They’d get up, go to work, eat, watch that show (that Jax DEFINITELY wasn’t getting invested in, seriously!!!) and play some metal gear solid (which only got more and more ridiculous)

It eventually lead to them standing outside of the nerd shop.

Chapter Text

They walked into the nerd shop.

A week had passed and they were ready to do a check up on what was happening with the computer, to see if they could at least try to free everyone.

Jax didn’t know if it was just him, but it felt somewhat tense walking into the doors. Normally Jax is pretty good at going with the flow of the situation, but he guesses these are people’s lives and that’s just… not that fun.

Of course he’d never say any of this aloud, but gangle seems like she’s already thinking the same thing.

They both walk in, the store was about the same as Jax remembers it. Figures, comic books, old video games. None of it really interested him, but he did find himself recognizing a bit more then he ever would have before, a poster of solid snake, a box with a squid girl figure inside, and a lot of characters he didn’t know the names of but recognize from the memorabilia of them in gangles house.

Kinda made him feel like a nerd. Not that any one in this shop would care.

They looks around, and eventually find the employee they talked to before.

“Oh good” he heard gangle mumbles once she laid her eyes on them.

“What? Worried they’d take the computer and run?”

“Or get sucked in…” she said.

Well clearly they didn’t. So there was no use thinking about it.

They make their way over.

“Oh! There you two are, you’ve come for the update?” The employee says, with a classic customer service grin.

“What do you think?” Jax immediately responded with.

“I’d say yes” the employee said “so we ended up finding the disk you two where talking about” they go under the counter, and grab something “here”

They lift up a plain looking disk, on the top is ‘test 1 c&a’ written in some type of marker. Jax didn’t know what he expected (he did kinda know, he expected a brightly colored disk with Cain on the front that said in big bubble letters ‘THE AMAZING DIGITAL CIRCUS’ or something cheesy like that).

“We couldn’t get it working on our laptop, or any of the pc’s here” the employee explains “I think it only works on older computers, but the one you brought in is busted.” That’s one way to put it “we were able to get some of the files, there’s definitely a game on here, but it did not like more modern technology” yeah they already knew that.

“So… what’s next?” Gangle asked.

“We’re going to try Linda’s old computer, and see what we can about the coding language it uses, we should be able to find a way to test it out without a headset” they said “after that we’ll maybe try to see why it’s not pairing well with newer computers, it really depends on how it goes”

“Thank you for all this” gangle smiles.

“Well don’t thank me yet, I’m just as interested as you, but a little warning it may take a while”

Jax shrugs “as long as it happens eventually we’ll be fine”

Gangle tenses up “but uh you know maybe not too long”

“Don’t worry we’ll all be alive to see it” the employee smiles.

“That’s what you think” Jax mumbles with a smile.

The employee laughs. “Anyways is there anything else I can help you with?” Geez this dude really can’t tell when they’re being insulted can they? Yeah technically Jax didn’t say anything straight up threatening, but still they act like Jax is like them…. Joking about being like them. When really the joke should be that he’s like them?

Eh whatever, no use in dwelling on it.

“Nah I think that’s it-“ Jax tries to say before getting interrupted.

“I might take a look around” gangle says. Of course she would say that! And she’s got the car so it’s not like Jax can just leave (plus it’s hot outside.) “but I don’t think we need anything else” she adds.

“Alrighty! Stop by if you need anything”

“You are not making us stay here” Jax then says to her. She starts to walk to another section of the store.

“Just for a little bit” she smiles. Oh. She knows what she’s doing. Ugh!!! “Hey do you want this”

She points at the aforementioned squid girl figure.

“And… why would I want that?” He asks.

“I thought you seemed to like that show”

“I’d rather die” he immediately says.

And she… laughs??? Why is she laughing??? What’s funny? He didn’t say anything funny???? What does she know???

“Alright then” she says after giggling.

What a weird interaction….?

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More weeks pass. They were a little worried at first, gangle more visibly so, that the updates from that store was few and far between. But eventually the worry started to fade out. Not because they got any grand update but just because it was a lot of ‘it’s going to take a lot of time’ responses.

And a lot of time, it definitely was taking.

As for gangle and Jax. They where mostly at work. A lot of work.

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One random day at work

Rowan was standing off to the side rambling about too much things to keep up with. First it was about Halloween costumes (they close that day, and what is 5? Who cares) and then about the newest star wars movie, Rowan hated it apparently.

“I just can’t believe they’d do that to….” His voice didn’t trail off, but to Jax it sure sounded like it did. He honestly couldn’t care less about it. It was just a diffrent genre of nerd. Though he guesses he thought about that for metal gear solid and it was definitely… not that. “…. But the new sonic game was pretty good”

“You know gangle likes that stuff” he said, half just because of the human urge to go ‘oh hey I know that thing because of another thing I know’ and to try to get this guy off his back and onto gangles back.

Rowan face darkened “oh uhh… that’s cool but…” He then gave a concerned look for a moment “maybe you shouldn’t uhh call her that…”

“Nah she likes it” he smiles.

He knew Rowan wasn’t the biggest fan of gangle. Neither was that one teen that worked, but to be fair no one likes their boss. It just was almost funny to see Rowan get so strange about it.

He looks back and forth “you uh… sure man?”

“Hey gangle!!!” He then shouted.

Rowan’s face grew concerned “wait-“

She popped her head in, looking a bit annoyed “Jax? What is it”

“Well forgive me for trying to include you, what do you think of the new sonic game?” He asked, innocently enough.

She gave him an odd look, before smiling somewhat, and walking in further. “The shadow generations one or the one about to come out?”

“I didn’t know you could play games from the future” Jax teased.

“Well, I thought the game was good” she then said.

“Here that Rowan” he grinned.

He nodded, awkwardly “yep… that’s cool, I uh, also really liked it” he then looked around, for anything to do, anything to grab, to probably try to make it look like he was doing work.

She looked at him “you know what I’ll make you play it Jax”

“Wait what?” There was no way gangle was going to make him play a SONIC game of all things!

“You should man, it’s pretty good” Rowan said, now having grabbed a broom.

“Okay let’s finish, what’d you call it? Mgs first” Jax rolled his eyes.

“Oh I love metal gear” Rowan smiled.

Oh god, now he had to deal with two nerds!
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One night, after a long shift of work. He laid in bed, watching his room get darker with the time that passed. Thinking about how he scared Rowan again with gangle.

It was funny.

That gangle of all people could scare someone…

Well.

He supposed he hated the thought of going back to his old boss before he found out she was gangle… she must’ve acted like how she did at spudsys. That was so long ago at this point but it did…

His mind immediately thought ‘she changed’ and he had to stop himself from laughing out loud, what is he an ‘I can fix him girl’?

Gangle probably is, that must be why she agrees to hang out with him huh?

His mind couldn’t help but go back to the days they’ve spent together though. Yeah more often than not she’s mumbling and speaking almost on the verge of tears. But she’s been smiling a lot more. And laughing.

Always with the laughing.

It’s like she knows something, something he doesn’t.

She’s trying to get him to enjoy all the things she likes with her. What to mock him for it? He can’t deny some of its working. It’s entertaining to say the least. And that’s what he wanted from this whole thing.

Geez it’s dumb to imagine he was so close to missing the circus. From all these late night thoughts it almost feels like that place made them worse people. It allowed them to do whatever they wanted. It was freeing, very freeing. But… if it was good they’d always want to stay there forever, and if it was good he wouldn’t be happy right now.

There were pros and cons to both of course. But it’s like saw or something (which gangle finally allowed him to put on for them) bad situation makes them appreciate life more? And a lot of violence? Eh something like that.

Maybe these were all ramblings from him.maybe he should fear gangle or something dumb when he looks at her. But their…..

It doesn’t matter.

He forces his eyes closed, and begs his brain to go to sleep until it finally does.

.

.

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Soon enough even more time passed. All pretty mundane.

On one of their days off they sat on the couch, as they normally do.

Finally watching the finale cutscene of the first metal gear solid. Both laughing their but off about some dumb joke.

The whole game was ridiculous. Every bit of it. From cutscenes that last way too long, to characters talking nothing like real people, and the main character seemingly not knowing anything that’s going on.

“So…” gangle smiles softly “did you like it?”

“Pfft” jax rolls his eyes “it was horrible”

“Really?” She tilts her head “you where laughing a lot”

“Yeah, of course” he says “you saw what was going on”

“So… your entertainment was entertaining?” She says.

He paused “well yeah, but like” he trailed off. Trying to get his thoughts in order. He did have fun playing it, and listening to the absurd cutscenes. But it wasn’t good? It was a nerdy video game with bad writing, it was just… fun. But he guesses it is meant to be a fun game. It wouldn’t have been a fun game without it going off the deep end. So how does he explain that and still keep his dignity.

“Do you wanna play the next one?” She asks.

“Pfft sure whatever” sue him! The game was fun!

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.

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Jax was leaning on the counter at work, not doing much of anything when the phone rang.

It made him jump ever so slightly, not that no one EVER called them, but like… c’mon who calls McDonald’s?

With a groan he picked up the phone “Petrichorville McDonald’s, this is jax how can I help you?”

“…Andy…?”

He paused. Oh yeah. He knew that voice.

“You know you really need to be more polite over the phone, I can’t imagine you’re leaving a good impression to these customers, if your manager-“

“What do you want mom” he lowered his voice, yeah the room was empty, but that’s also means you could hear a pen drop (or more accurately, GANGLE could hear a pen drop).

“Now now honey, don’t run out of the house then sass me, I thought I taught you better.” She didn’t, that’s what jax wanted to say. But he bit his tongue. “I can forgive thanksgiving. But were you really planning on missing Christmas with your mother?” She asks.

It’s… past thanksgiving? It’s December- he hadn’t even realized. He knew that Halloween had passed (gangle and him drove home quite late that night, and they still saw a few people in costumes out). And now thinking about they like in a place where there’s only one temperature (and it’s hot).

But he didn’t remember what they did on thanksgiving? They had most likely spent it like a normal day off. (Staying in there room and then playing metal gear for some time).

“Uhm…. Yeah” he mumbled. The words should’ve come easily to him (the thought sure did). But something about talking back to her made his stomach hurt. There was no reason it should’ve, maybe it was just out of habit.

“…” the silence was “Anne- i mean Andy hun. You’re being rude” he could hear the distain in her voice “how could you ever try to hurt your mother like this. Leaving and then disrespecting me. Like you’re trying to give me a heart attack”

His hand hovered over the hang up button. He was 22, a grown adult, and he was getting shamed by his mom. Screw the guy who words at the nerd shop, Jax must’ve won the award of the biggest man child in the world.

“Now I expect us to share a Christmas, or else I will show up to your… place of employment and we will continue this chat” he hated her. he’s always hated her. He hated her tone, her voice. The way she spoke like she was downplaying every bad thing that happened, every bad thing she did. She spoke like she thought she was the nicest person in the world, like she was above everyone. “You know I don’t want to do that honey. I shouldn’t even be seen in that place. And your manager seems so nice, I would hate to cause trouble for her”

….

Jax rolled his eyes, thankful he was on the phone. Though a little smile popped up “yeah you know what, okay. We’ll have Christmas together, and since you like my manager so much I’ll bring her along too! The more the merrier right?”

“Anne please, pettiness is unflattering”

“Pettiness??” He put on an innocent voice through his smirk “that’s rude mom, I thought you liked her” he could hear her mouth open “anyways!!! I’ll bring her over on Christmas Day!! Maybe we can get breakfast together huh? Sounds good bye!”

Though he doesn’t have an exact plan set out into motion he knows this will be fun.

“Gangle!!” He calls out.

After a moment gangle shuffles out “yes jax?”

“We’re going to my moms on Christmas”

She gives him a weird look “and I’m going too….?”

“Yes”

“….okay….?” She looks around “should I-…. Uh bring my family or….?”

“No.”

“Yeah…” she mumbles “I honestly don’t even know where they are…” she then says. Concerning, but none of his concern.

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The day was Christmas Eve. It was dark out, he sat with gangle on the couch, watching a channel playing some Christmas movie he’s never seen. and you bet jax had a plan.

He glances down at a brightly colored box he had snuck from his room. Before turning to gangle, who didn’t seem too interested in the movie.

“You know I got you something” he smirks, before lifting up and giving gangle the neatly wrapped box, it even has a red bow on the top made from red ribbon!

“Oh…” she looks at it, and looks at him. “I’ll open it” she nervously unwraps the cardboard box. Still hesitant she takes some sissors and opens it.

She looks inside and takes out a tee shirt, it’s black, and in white font says ‘single ❌ taken ❌ gamer ✅’

She looks at it emotionless “you know” she starts “I also got you something” she gets up, and goes to the hallways and into her room, she comes out with a box (it looks to be just the box it arrived in).

Jax was going to ask why, but there’s very little point in his mind, he tears open the box with his bear hands, before pulling out a black tee shirt, it says, in bold white font ‘I paused my game to be here’ with an image of a controller on it.

Jax laughs, loudly, a little too loudly. He didn’t even mean too! He’d love to complain about gangle getting him a shirt he’s never going to wear, but he can’t even, eventually when his laughing dies down he goes “alright gangle, I’ll give you this, that was pretty funny”

She laughs with him.

“I’m going to make a hot chocolate” she then says “do you want any?”

“You bet” he smirks.

She leaves to go off into the kitchen. It’s not long until she walks out, handing him a cup.

“Uhm…..” gangle looked nervous, “Jax?”

He raised an eyebrow “what?”

“Uhm…. Rowan uhhh…..”

Jax immediately did not care. “Alright I’m gone-“

“Got dinner reservations, and he didn’t uh-“ she immediately said to interrupt him from leaving “his date flaked out, he asked if we wanted to go instead”

“Go to dinner with Rowan, I would rather die”

“Not with him” she sighs “it’s just for two people… us two…. Tomorrow night”

Intriguing “…what place”

“I uh… don’t know, I’ll have to see what address he wrote down, but it seems fancy”

Jax thinks “well alright”

“I hope it doesn’t get in the way of time with your mom” She then says.

“Nah that just means we have an out plan in case she tries to force us to stay” he smiles.

“Is that a… thing that will happen????” She sounds worried.

“Only one way to find out” he sings out.

She takes a sip of her hot chocolate.

She then moves her head to look up at the tv, the only thing glowing in the room, giving it a warm orange-ish glow. A jolly Christmas sounding song came from said tv, and echoed around the room.

“After I moved I never really celebrated Christmas” gangle then says “not that I remember”

Jax had always. He thinks he liked it as a kid. But he didn’t know, every celebration day had gone practically the same, they all seemed to merge together in his mind (he’s sure being stuck in the circus didn’t help with that). Normally he’d just do whatever his mom wanted and end the day feeling worse than if it was a regular day.

He didn’t say any of this aloud of course.

“But Christmas eves were a lot like this when I was with them… hot chocolate with a movie in the background, staying up late… you know” she pauses “I can’t get any service or wifi to text any of them though”

“Prim set up for this to become a horror movie” jax grins.

“Oh don’t say that” she pouts “I guess I miss it I think…. I’m not sure.” She sinks into herself.

“So? What call them on the work phone then, trust me I’m my family had no problems with that” he somewhat laughed.

“I don’t think-…” she somewhat smiles “that that’s a good idea…? Or allowed…. And I don’t think they’d pick up” she mumbles. “It’s…. Always weird I was gone so long, I always just assumed they’d all have forgotten me by now…” she then says. “But I… I’m the one that can’t remember what they look like”

“Yeah…” he immediately said, he’s sure he had that same thought before “sucks to be you”

She laughs “like your one to talk! Your memories perfect??!”

“Yep! Always have been, always will be!” He grins. She smiles at him, clearly not believing him.

“But it’s kinda nice, I guess. To have somewhere here.” She smiles, before taking another sip out of her hot chocolate.

“You know” jax starts with a smile “you could just say you like having ME here”

“Ehhh” she then says, before giggling.

“Fine then! I like having SOMEONE here as well” he shakes his head “you’ll never know who”

She laughs “guess it’s a mystery”

The show wraps up, and he looks at the time, almost midnight “we should probably be heading off to bed”

“Oh wow… yeah” she then looks off to the side “you know when I was a kid I used to have a uh… sleepover in my siblings room on Christmas Eve”

“You wanna have a sleepover?” Jax couldn’t stop the amusement from entering his voice (he wouldn’t have stop it either).

“I uh don’t know… maybe….” She mumbles.

“Tch fine, but I’m not sleeping on the floor!” He grins.

“You have a queen size bed” she looks at him.

He pauses “yeah, I know”

She sighs, before walking to the door of his room.

“Too scared to let yourself in” he teases, then she, unexpectedly, takes the door knob and opens it. Obviously to spite him (and yeah him saying that was basically an invitation inside, but still it was a more bold move then he was used to with gangle.

She gives him a small smile in the hallway before walking in. And then immediately playing down on his bed.

“Hey-???!” He says, entering the room “what did I just say”

“I didn’t say you had to sleep on the floor” she grins, as if she had done nothing wrong (it was very much so a page out of his book).

Fine two can play at that game. Jax walks forward and then lays down on his bed saying “alright” like it was a challenge.

Still he purposely laid on the furthest side of the bed.

He gave her one last glare; but her eyes were already closed. He’s never had a sleepover but he felt like this wasn’t how you go about it. Still he closed his eyes too.

And waited

And waited

And waited

And slept.
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He woke up bright and early. And of course, the first thing he realized was that he was back to back with gangle.

Geez okay

He honestly didn’t really know what he was expecting. But it was DEFINITELY not this.

He really thought they’d laugh it off and go ‘that’s a good one’ and then either do something or return to their own respective rooms, or that there was some sort of joke???

“Jax…” the soft voice came from behind him, he felt gangle shuffle slightly.

He frowned, his throat went dry. This is embarrassing, his face felt warm, and that’s when he realized…

This was the joke.

He suppressed a groan, remembering gangles smiles and small laughs, her teasing tone before he got in bed. He was waiting for a grand punchline! For her to laugh ‘just kidding almost got you’ but instead she entirely got him, just without telling him.

She was trying to embarrass him, honestly he could almost appreciate the method! It had regretfully made him blush more, because he’s an idiot that fell for it!!

“Yeah….” He had responded, very coolly, as if it didn’t effect him at all. Was he shaking??

His stomach turned. She mocked him, she hadn’t backed down out of it.

“You uh…. Okay?” she sits up. He doesn’t look at her. But he feels her glare. He hears the bed creak, and feels the shuffling, he try’s to turn his head into the blankets.

No one makes a fool out of him!

She laughs. Very softly. He can’t help but glance at her, and she looks away. “Jaxxy boy!!” She giggles while singing it out “what’s wrong~?” She muffling her laughs.

Yeah… embarrassing.

Hey wait?! Why is he embarrassed anyways???? She slept in the same bed as him too??? This isn’t like the maid dress she made a fool out of both of them, and no one else is even here??? They just ruined both of their reputation to what?? Each other??? No one will no??

So he sits up, coolly, chill. “Nothing” he shrugs, and plants a wide grin on his face “are you projecting”

Her grin falters. And she tilts her head “what? No-“ that’s when he sees the faintest pink on her face, score. “Let’s just get ready for the breakfast-“ she shoves the blankets off her, trying to scoot forward to leave the bed. Trying to end this interaction.

Jax smiles, he’s got this in the bag now, he places a hand on her shoulder “Aw you’re blushing, now why is that” he pokes.

She pauses, looks at him, the gently moves his hand off her shoulder, smiles and says “I just think it’s cute when you’re embarrassed”

He blinks.

She then gets off the bed, and leaves the room, grinning ear to ear.

Oh….

She got him.

Chapter Text

Jax must’ve sat there dumbly for a half an hour, but eventually he got up, got ready, and escaped the confines of his room.

He finds gangle in the kitchen

“Did you get me something else…?” She looks up at him.

And in front of her jax saw what she was talking about, two, brightly colored boxes in front of the table. It was pretty hard to miss, seeing as they were both as big as the table. One labeled jax, the other gangle, both had a ‘from Santa’ written on them.

“No.”

It had not been him, he already bought her the shirt.

Which meant it had to have been gangle. After all it SAID ‘jax’ and ‘gangle’ and everyone else would’ve called them by their other names.

She looks at him, for a long while “if you say so….” She sounds like she doesn’t believe him, but Jax knows better what she’s capable of, tricking him into long cons to embarrass him! So it had to have been her that bought and wrapped these (though she hadn’t wrapped the other gift??).

The alternative… well nothing he could think of was possible, the only other person who would maybe call them that is Rowan, and he doesn’t have a key.

“I guess I’ll… open it then” she looked at him.

“Uh sure….? Like you don’t know already what’s in there” he rolled his eyes.

“I don’t…???” She did sound confused. And she stared at him for long, before smiling softly. So… she did get the presents? Why she got herself a present he didn’t know. But this was some weird con she was planning.

She opened it and it was.

“A bike…???” She tilted her head at this (over acting much!! She’s so faking!!). Inside was a red bike.

So he moves forward and tore the wrapping paper off his.

“Oh…. Another bike??” She seemed confused. Inside was a purple bike. Why she bought them he didn’t know? Yeah he didn’t know how to drive, but why buy both of them a bike? How much did this cost???

“Why….?” He asked.

She shrugged “I uh…. Don’t know, is this a joke or…?” She was really acting genuinely. But he reminded himself it had to have been her that got this, because who else????

“Okay… uhm should we head to my moms place”

“Oh yeah!!” She then said, tearing her eyes off the two bikes. “I guess we can uh… put these in the garage…. Unless you wanna bike there…?”

“I’ve never owned a bike before” he said, instead of saying the full truth, which is that he doesn’t know how to ride a bike. Because why would he ever need that skill!!

She sighs “that’s good, I’ve only ever had a scooter”

“The nerd skateboard.” He commented.

“I-… yeah actually a bit” she mumbled.

Still… why would she buy them a bike.

They moved the two bikes into the garage and then shortly after found themselves in gangles car.

“So… where does she live.”

“Oh yeah, uh not too far I’ll give you directions”

The car ride was short and pretty boring, and it wasn’t long until they reached the house he had left.

It had actually been a while since he was last here. He wasn’t keeping count but he could’ve sworn they arrived back to the real world somewhere around June…

Maybe it wasn’t that long ago? It didn’t feel right. Though their days were rushed and full of work so maybe that’s why the time flew by. It’s strange.

They exited the car.

“This is the right place right…?” She asks.

“You don’t trust me?” He grins.

“No.”

He almost laughed, dies Christmas make gangle feisty, because it sure does seem like it. This is even better for him though, it’ll make breakfast more entertaining.

She holds up her hand to knock.

“Nah I got a key” jax grins, holding it up. She knocks anyways.

jax pockets the key.

The door opens with a gentle creak. “Come in! Come in” his mom says in a soft voice “it’s so nice to see you ann, and… and you must be the manger”

“Ms. Melpo!” Jax grins.

“Right… and your first name is?” She smiles.

Gangle moves but jax taps her hand and shoots her a look. Gangle, luckily, doesn’t respond.

“I think she’s just Ms. Melpo mom” he grins harder.

“Right, Ms. Melpo, you are awfully young” she looks gangle up and down “if we are being so formal why don’t you call me Mrs. lagomorph”

There was no way that’s his last name. Oh god is that his last name??? Nevermind his name is just as bad (if not worse) than Maggie melpo.

Gangle gives a short nod. “Thanks Mrs. Lagomorph” she mumbles. His mom looks at her, then looks back ahead, not saying anything. The door is shut behind them, then locked.

“Now your father and I spent some time making breakfast, he sadly could not join us, but that’s just mean more time with me right?” she smiles.

“Thanks m’am” gangle says shortly.

“Now you two, please, sit down. I can get the food” she smiles, Jax knows that’s code for she didn’t cook all the food, and doesn’t want them to see the bag of premade biscuits or whatever she’s hiding.

“Your mom seems nice” gangle said to him. He doesn’t respond.

She walks back in the room, with two plates she puts in front of them “eat up” she grins, and comes back with her own plate. Sitting down at the head of the table.

She looks at him, taking a bite out of her food “so. How is” she glances at him “at work…?”

“Oh, he’s uh, good” gangle mumbles, taking a bite out of the food, she smiles “he’s helpful”

Honestly he HAS BEEN pretty helpful recently! Yeah MOST of the time is spent doing nothing, but that’s can’t be helped when the place is pretty nothing. When it’s busy he’s been making burgers and like taking orders, all that jazz.

(Sure most of it is the bare minimum out of fear gangle will kick him out if he pisses her off to much (and or losing his job or something)). But he’s glad gangle seems to appreciate his honesty hard work! Hes been very good recently (that or she’s saying that to get his mom off her back, but it’s both a win win to him!).

“Great” his mom smiles. “I wouldn’t want anything less” she looks at gangle “and what are your plans after this”

“We’ll me and jax where planning on getting dinner”

She looks at her, then at him.

“Jax….? C’mon anne that’s not a real name”

“Wow gangle you hear that? I have no name, yet I must scream” he says dramatically.

She giggles “I didn’t know you read books, isn’t that a nerd thing?”

“I- I can read??? And no!! That’s a smart person thing”

“And nerds are….?”

Okay…. Fair. But he only goes after those video game, and comic, and anime whatnot nerds, just referencing a popular book isn’t a nerd thing unless it’s like lord of the rings!

His mom is glaring at both of them. “Well.” She takes a breath in and then out “am I invited to dinner?”

“No-“ jax says immediately.

“We got reservations from someone who isn’t going anymore, it’s only for two people, sorry” gangle slightly interrupting him.

“You know I don’t think it’s really professional to have a manger and associate hanging out like this” she then looks at him “well I guess it’s alright, I trust you won’t stay in that dirty place for long, I won’t tell if you don’t” she laughs “though that being said I think you should tell me where you’ve… ran off too honey”

That had very little to do with dinner.

The exaggerate way she spoke hurt his ears. Too smiley, and obviously planning something

“Roommates with gangle” he gestures at her.

Her face drops slightly

“What? Shouldn’t I be growing up more, exploring the world, getting out” he grins.

“Of course honey” she smiles “but you’re still so young, I just” she looks at gangle “don’t want you getting in with the wrong crowds, and I don’t like that you left so unexpectedly”

Did she… not like gangle? What did she think was going on. He kinda got that, when they first arrived, (having gangles only name for her be a Ms. Or the nonsense of gangle, he knew his mom would hate that) but still he can’t help but wonder what’s happening in her mind

“Both of you are just so young, and I know you Anne, you’re confused, and still figuring everything out. You need to not make rash decisions, come and talk with me though about them, I swear you hate talking to me. And know you’re just making a lot of choices, Andy was fine, but jax. It just feels like you’re getting too… reckless”

That’s when jax made a strange revelation.

He had to cast the thought out of his head for a moment. He thought the name Anne was just a ‘cute little nickname’ or whatever crap, but he’s starting to think… it may have been like… his deadname???? That’s dumb, and he knows that dumb, but he remembers when he first ran into her she corrected herself and now she’s being all weird about it.

He didn’t remember whatever his original name was (he honestly couldn’t care less). But he did not want to accept a world where his name was Anne and he picked Andy??? What is he? 50 years old AND the most stereotypical trans tv character?! Step over zooble new guys in town.

Yeah it was disrespectful, maybe that’s what he should’ve been focused on more, but he kinda just felt used to it from her, what’s the point in trying anyways. It made a pit in his stomach but he didn’t care enough to correct her.

Still the names thing felt the most off. Like he doesn’t know himself, because why in the world would he pick Andy?? And why pick a name so similar to his other name, he swears that’s a trope, and it just didn’t feel.

Real… or right. Or him.

This whole deal is messing with his head.

“So what’s gangle going to do to me then huh” he crossed his arms

“Know I didn’t say… melpo was a bad influence, just that I don’t think you know what you’re doing-“

“Okay then if you know what I’m doing so we’ll tell me. What am I doing”

At this point gangle was huddled in on herself.

“I made THIS WHOLE MEAL FOR YOU! And this is how you treat me?! THIS ALWAYS HAPPENS, you’re always just… looking for ways to hurt me! And BRINGING HER” his mom takes a breath, almost sounding like she’s going to hyperventilate from anger alone. And then a pause “Look I’m sorry… just let me talk to you, just one on one, okay?”

“Whatever you want to say say it here”

She shoots another glare at gangle, then shifts to recompose herself, with a light smile “right, of course. Ms. Melpo, it is?… she seems lovely of course. I’m just worried about certain aspects of her. And I do not want to watch you give away your life for some…” she tries to smile harder “albeit lovely, girl”

Jax doesn’t really know what she thinks is happening, but watching her get really upset about it is honestly much funnier.

“Yes she is lovely” he says with a smile. And watches her face fall.

“Yes” his mom says deadpan “but you only listen to the parts you want to hear of course, know honey, you will return to the house. You understand why this is”

“I don’t” he shrugs.

“Do I need to reexplain myself”

“I think you do” he smiles at her.

“I didn’t raise you to be this childish”

Gangle looks as if she’s eaten something sour, and looks at him, then his mom.

“Well I think we better go… because of…. Uh the reservations….?” Gangle then buts in (very unsure of herself).

“The dinner reservations?” His mom glares at her “OH! Like you don’t know what I’m talking about” she then shoots her glare at Jax. Then stands up suddenly “she’s lying to take you away from me.” She points at gangle. Jax raises an eyebrow. “And letting you dress… like that, and talk like this, and- dying hair, and give you ideas-“ she cut herself off in anger.

He looked down at his outfit, a normal tee-shirt and pants, what in the world is she even talking about. He’s never seen her break this extreme, yeah she’s said MUCH worse things, but exploded with someone else around.

“Yeah I think we better head off the to reservations” Jax stands up. Everyone knowing full well their dinner reservations weren’t at 11am.

His mom falls to her knees.

A sniffle “wait….come on…” his moms on the ground, she shifts, to look up at him, tears in her eyes “Ann-andy, c’mon, don’t leave, I love you…. Jax, c’mon honey” she sniffles again, a tear rolls down “I support you, no matter what you think I always do, I’ll keep you safe” she sniffs “ill keep you out of trouble, I… I need you here honey….” She sniffs again “I’m sorry for yelling, I swear, don’t leave….”

“Let’s go gangle.” Jax then says.

She nods briefly

She stands up, and they made their way to the door, jax reached out to open it, though right as he did he noticed gangle tumble back.

He turned around to he his mom had her arm in a tight clamp, slightly sitting up, and had yanked gangle down, her face right up in her ear, lips moving. But it was too quiet for jax to hear.

He was frozen for a moment. Yeah sure she’s gotten a little intense over the years, but she never been so openly hostile towards someone else with no perception of her. She was passive aggressive, complained about most people behind their backs, and always had the fakest tones and smiled to look like someone who should be well respected.

But she never used to engage in any behavior that would obviously make her look bad.

It didn’t matter how she changed though, what matters is how she’s acting now. Which is gross and weird.

He didn’t know why she seemed to hate gangle, but he was quick to snap back in reality, shoot her a glare, and help gangle up, push her outside. Give a quick “bye see you never” slam the door and begin to walk to the car.

He glances back at gangle, growing and looking at the ground. Before looking up at him, and walking to the car and getting in.

She looks back to the front door, probably to make sure his mom wouldn’t try to run out at them. And she just sat there for a moment in the car.

“Uhm… why…. Did you uh… invite me…?” Gangle mumbles.

Which honestly was a fair question. He kinda just thought it would be funny. The drama, the sass, that sort of deal.

And maybe he didn’t want to deal with it alone sure, there wasn’t really a getting out of it, unless he wanted to go through everything and try to get her banned from McDonald’s or something.

(He knows he could’ve asked gangle to not let her in or kick her out, but honestly he doesn’t think she’d believe him with it, smiles seem to win over so many people. At least she’s probably have to kick her out now if she tried anything.) but who knows! Maybe not!

“Funny” jax shrugs.

She looks at him like he’s insane.

He makes a show to roll his eyes “well I guess it could’ve ended up funnier, but you weren’t giving me too much to work with” and he shrugs.

She doesn’t respond, just looks at him. Gives him a soft nod, and turns the key to start the car, then drives off.

The rest of the car ride is quiet, and she unlocks the door and walks inside to the house wordlessly.

The door is shut and she looks at him “I’m uh… going to go in my room now…” she then ducks out of there and heads to her room, shutting the door.

He couldn’t get a read on her.

Beside him he heard a meow, looking down he saw exactly what he expected “what do you want?”

Almost surprisingly the cat meowed again, almost like he was responding to him.

Jax sighed, he guessed he was doing this now, he walked closer to the cat, and the cat immediately took off, and jumped to the couch, then sat down, and meowed again.

“Fine” he went up to the cat, and sat on the couch next to them. “So….?”

The cat jumped in his lap, pushing their head onto his stomach, and purring so much it was the only thing he could hear.

He pet the cat, as he nuzzled the hand, trying to get him to pet his cheeks.

“Not such a mamas boy anymore huh” Jax chuckled “mad at gangle for closing her door? She’s so mean isn’t she” he then says. Of course the cat doesn’t respond (not that he really expected him too of course), but continued to purr as Jax pet him.

That’s when, as if to prove him wrong, gangles door opened.

Her eyes immediately went to the couch, him and the cat (the cat looked directly at her as well). He saw her face light up.

“Awww Artemis likes you” she then said.

“Yeah” Jax responds “we’re plotting together, I’m teaching him to scratch your face on command, c’mon attack!!” He says to her then the cat, of course the cat does not attack, but continues to purr and get pet.

Gangle laughs. “He’d never, he’s innocent” she walks over, and puts her hand out, the cat immediately pulls away from Jax to instead stick his face in gangles hand. Betrayal.

“It’s a long con” Jax then says.

She laughs a bit. Sitting next to him on the couch.

“…so” she then starts. And Jax can’t help but think he doesn’t want to hear where this is going.

Maybe it’s the glare he shoots at her, or his face darkens or something. Because she looks away, then smiles.

“I think I have an idea on what to wear to dinner” she very obviously changes the subject to what she was going to talk about before.

“Oh?” He asks “and what’s that”

“I just think… maybe it would be nice to wear the shirt you got me” she smiles, and Jax lets out a small laugh “only if you wear yours” she quickly adds on.

His laugh dies down. Of course that’s how she’s playing this!! Embarrass himself and have the funniest moment in history happen. Or don’t and be boring.

He looks up at her and smiles “you know what, yeah that sounds like a good idea”

She smiles at him, letting out a chuckle or two. Before looking away. She pets the cat again.

“So….” Oh god not this again. “Your mom huh?” She then says. Clearly this had been the real thing she had wanted to talk about.

“Yep!” He says, trying to end that conversation there.

Sadly it doesn’t “she’s uh… mean”

“Wow really? I couldn’t tell” he rolls his eyes.

She frowns.

“C’mon lighten up ribbons, it’s not that deep” he says with maybe a little more intensity in his voice than he wanted, he looks off to the side.

She’s almost pouting “I just mean like… all of that was…” she trails off “messed up…?” She says quietly.

“And? What am I supposed to do about it”

She looks at him. Doesn’t say anything and just really looks at him.

He’s starting to feel uncomfortable. “Listen if you’re going to say something just say it.” He glares at her. He hates it when people hide things, and if she wants to like kick him out or is angry or whatever she’s thinking the last thing he wants her to do is smile and not say any of it and have it bubble up and explode at him.

She looks at the ground “well… I don’t really know how to say it… or what I’m thinking… I guess…” she taps her hand “you don’t think we’ll have to deal with her again, do you?”

“As long as you kick her from McDonald’s I think we’re fine” he rolls his eyes, he doesn’t even know why he just does.

She nods. “I’ll be sure to do that…”

After an awkward ping of silence she reaches for the remote to turn the tv on, playing some Christmas movie.

She looks over to him, but doesn’t say anything. When he looks back at her she pets the ‘mamas boy’ probably to try to hide the fact that she’s staring.

She sits next to him the whole time but doesn’t say a word. He doesn’t really understand what she’s trying to get at.

They sit there longer than he probably would’ve liked, but whatever, it was Christmas. They could do whatever they wanted.

It was however getting quite late (5pm in-fact, time passed by so much quicker now).

Gangle stood up “I think I’m going to get ready now”

Jax nodded, giving one last pet to the cat he also stood up.

He headed back to his room, deciding what to wear, trying to figure out the perfect pants before realizing if he was really going to wear a stupid gamer tee shirt why bother trying to look fancy.

He was ready pretty quickly, getting freshened up, brushing hair, it was all whatever. Gangle had probably taken twice as long to get ready (but honestly that wasn’t saying much seeing as he didn’t take long at all).

She then returned to his room, she had very light make up on her face and some jewelry, honestly he could’ve laughed then and there, because even though the rest of her looked fit to go to some fancy restaurant, she still stuck to her word and wore the dumb ‘single taken gamer’ shirt he’d given her.

He had never imagined her wearing the shirt when he bought it (maybe to sleep or something just not to waste it, but it was horrid to wear in public), nevertheless do this. And honestly it made him feel so dumb, but it was kinda okay because at least he knew that he was taking gangle down with him.

“Ready to go”

“You know it” he replied.

With that they headed out to the car.

She turned on the car, pulled out, and began to drive.

The place wasn’t too far away, and it was clear by the look of it was fancy, and kinda packed (probably from it being the only place open on Christmas).

A breeze hit them as they walked out, and it seemed to be getting dark already as they head in.

Gangle showed them the reservations and they were quickly seated.

Jax tried to hide a laugh from the sight alone of gangle dressed up in an absurdly fancy place wearing that shirt, and she smiled at him. Maybe Getting the same amusement.

He then looked down at the menu, and picked whatever thing was the cheapest (he knew they had to be splitting the bill.)

“Jax” gangle then said, and she was sounding serious again “your mom uh… she said some pretty bad things to uh… me??? About… I mean about both of us, but uh… mostly you”

He felt an urge of annoyance go through him, he wished she’d just let this all go, instead he smiled. Fine he’ll hear it out “alright then spill, whats the gossip then” he said dramatically, hey maybe it will be funny.

“I uh…. It uh…” gangle, clearly insecure or something sunk into herself. “I just wanted to say I uh… support…. Uhm you… I mean it was bad I mean she, I don’t think I should… uhm” gangle looked around, and was mumbling “she kinda threatened you… and me to uh… bring you back as…” she sunk into her chair. Jax could assume what she said, clearly gangle did not want to repeat it.

So instead he make a show to look nonchalant, with a smile “c’mon gangle I’ve got stupid purple hair and you probably write fanfiction, I’m more surprised she didn’t call us slurs”

She glared at him, before it softened and she looked away “I just… don’t understand how you’re so…” she gestured at him.

“What do you want me to say?! Oh boo-hoo my mom sucks, anyone with half a brain can tell that!” He felt anger raise up in his body, what did she want from him? And she knows, he knew she would eventually, but still this all sucks. He knows what, nothing he can do to stop it.

She pouts “that’s not what I mean.”

“She’s gone now right? I’d rather laugh it off then let her bother me like she wants to”

Gangle does that head tilt again. Before looking down at her menu, then looking up “well… I guess it’s a little funny….? In retrospect…. Because of how wrong she was?”

Anger fizzled out of him as fast as it came too him “yeah that’s the spirit” he then said.

She gave him a half smile. “I mean if she was trying to pretend to like me she wasnt doing a good job, I don’t even know what I did”

“It was the Ms. Melpo thing I’d guess!” Jax then adds “did you see her face fall when I told her to call you that, she probably viewed it as disrespectful because she’s older then you”

Gangle giggles a little “I don’t understand being that pent up about a last name”

That when Jax laughed “it was either that or call you ‘gangle’” he imagines her thoughts, not wanting to show the respect in calling her Ms. But not wanting to say the absurdity that is ‘gangle’ “I was halfway hoping she would!”

“She really was something, she kept having to readjust herself, like that would somehow convince me she wasnt being mean”

Jax laughs at that “I could’ve sworn she was better at hiding all that, I guess you really riled her up”

“By what? Existing?!” She smiled.

“the worst crime of all!” Jax laughed.

She had laughed as well.

“Though she totally thought we were dating” Jax then said.

Gangles face dropped. And Jax had laughed at her reaction, there he goes!! Getting her back for what happened on Christmas Eve.

Her face was bright red “w-what??!!”

Jax laughed even louder “did you hear how she talked about you?? ‘Influencing me’, ‘wasting my life for a girl’, c’mon gangle it was SO obvious”

Gangle then laughs too “oh no!!! You’re right” she giggles out. “Ewww” she laughs.

Jax puts on an extremely fake pout “what? You don’t want to be the Otacon to my solid snake” he says dramatically.

That causes gangle to laugh harder.

They continued to poke jabs at his mom, how she was throwing a ‘tantrum’, or making big deals out of nothing, or acting like gangle was some high school degenerate that was going to give Jax drugs (or ‘worst of all, turn him gay!’).

Eventually the waitress came by and they had ordered and gotten their food, still erupting in fits of giggles about some new joke they had against her. Jax had felt like anger or frustration hadn’t even existed in the first place. Instead switched with laughter and dumb jokes.

Eventually the conversation switched, to hobbies.

Honestly Jax hadn’t really done much of anything before the circus, he mostly just worked, studied, and judged people (all things he still doesn’t! But he’s definitely diversified a bit!).

Gangle, on the other hand, seemed to have at least started every hobby in the world.

“Skateboarding?!” Jax laughs.

She nods, embarrassed “I was really young- and really bad at it” she gives a small laugh “I fell once and never tried again”

“So? How about now, what’s your favorite thing to do”

“Well… Probably draw my ocs, and make them stories… I always wanted to make a comic” she smiles “A webcomic…” she then adds.

“But you never did”

She shakes her head.

“Geez, giving up on your dreams huh?” He shakes his head dramatically.

“Well I never had time-… and energy. It just felt…” she takes a bit out of her food, then her eyes light up and she smiles “you know me and you should work on something together.”

He paused in his track.

“Huh? What???”

“Yeah, like make characters and a comic” she smiles.

“Yeah…. No? Not doing it” he immediately says.

Yet her smile doesn’t fade “why not?”

“Can’t draw” he says.

“Can’t or won’t” she then says, he doesn’t see the difference.

“Won’t then, if you’re going to be all philosophical or whatever about it”

She laughs “alright then, you don’t need to draw, but you could help come up with a story”

He looks at her “c’mon, really?”

“You always put ideas in the suggestion box, what’s the difference”

“Well that’s not a story, that was just an… activity” he shrugs.

“Putting characters into a situation is the same as planning a situation for us isn’t it?”

He didn’t feel like that was right, but… you know what “pffft sure, I’ll help” he grins “but you bet I’m going to make our characters go through hell”

She laughs “like I won’t?”

Right, she’s most likely a fanfic writer, none of these characters will be safe.

Chapter Text

Gangle and Jax stood outside the nerd shop once more. It had been a while since they last been here.

A few months at least, they had meant to come sooner but were so busy with work by the time they were off the place was closed, and the shop was too busy on their days off, so they just kept putting it off and putting it off.

Jax knows that gangle called them a month or so ago, from the sounds of it not much had changed.

This was the only moment the employee came back to them that they were free and Jax and gangle was as well.

Jax gave a glance at gangle before they walked inside. She seemed… off.

Visibly. Normally she’s at least slightly smiling, or frowning, but now her face seemed like it was in a perfectly straight line. She looked dead ahead too. She didn’t seem nervous, if she was her eyes would flicker around, or overly sad, then she’d be looking at the ground, but she didn’t seem happy

Then she would be looking at him.

There are only a few people in the store, Jax doesn’t pay them much mind. He’s quick to recognize the same employee that they gave the computer to behind the cash register.

They lock eyes for a moment and the employee smiles and waves at them, as if they can’t see them. Jax glances at gangle again with a smirk, ready to say some snide remark, but gangle just stares forward, straight faced.

For a moment Jax mind goes blank, he feels like even if he said anything in this moment gangle wouldn’t hear it. It’s not fun that way, so instead they both wordlessly walk up to the register.

The employees grinning from ear to ear “it barely works!!” They start talking the moment Jax and gangle come close. “But we did get the application to open”

Gangle slowly tilts her head, but still her expression doesn’t change and she doesn’t say a word. A tad uncomfortable with the silence he says “so?? What happened?? What did you see” he glances again at gangle, who doesn’t react.

“I know it will seem small” already a bad start “but it just opening up in the first place is huge!!”

“Yeah but what did you see??” Jax asks.

“Not much… the widow opened up on the old computer, and it was super laggy once I tried to look around, and nothing rendered, it was just like… a floor, walls, and some boxes. A lot of gray” the employee laughs nervously “but!! Proving that the game CAN work is enough reason to keep going! And will hopefully make things a LOT easier!!”

Jax didn’t know how much he believed that. He looks at gangle, no reaction. He looks again at the employee “great.” He sounded very obviously sarcastic, and the employee face slightly fell.

“Thank you” he heard gangle speak beside him, immediately Jax’s eyes turned to her “but I don’t think we need you to look through it anymore”

Jax blinked.

What.

“WHAT??” He shouted, but FORGIVE HIM! What in the world could gangle be talking about?? “What do you mean?? Of course keep looking into it”

The employee looked a little uncomfortable

“Well I understand if you want the disk back” the employee started “I can’t lie I’m curious myself about what this games about, and I know Jenna and- my coworkers, are all as well. I’ll give up the search if you really want, but I really don’t mind”

“Yeah! Gangle they don’t mind!!” Jax glares at her “I don’t know what that’s all about but I’m interested in the game too, keep at it” he then says.

“I mean… yeah.” Gangle mumbles.

What’s up with her?

.

.

.

Ever since Christmas Day gangle had made sure to kick his mom out of their workplace, they have a banned customer list and she’s the only name on there.

They haven’t yet had a problem, she tried to call the store not too long after the whole thing but no one picked up. And so far she seems to be in a ‘you’ll come crying back to me’ type of mood.

Jax stares at the phone in the empty store. And he can’t help but wonder if she’ll try to call again, how long it would take, if she could find out where gangle lives. If she’d even do anything.

Jax can’t help but wonder what she’d act like if he really did disappear for however long he was in the circus for. Would she blow up like she did at gangle, teardown whatever places she thought he could be hiding. Or would she pretend nothing happened, recollect herself and to save her own image say nothing happened. Would she even need to?

He can’t imagine anyone asking her where he is (especially when GANGLE herself was his manager) though he can’t help but wonder…

“Hey Rowan?” He leans back and calls out.

And naturally it isn’t long until his coworker walks out to the front. Looking onward at empty seats, clean tables and generally no one around except for them.

“Yeah man?” He looks around “you need help with something?” He definitely seems confused.

“No. I was just wondering, if me and gangle, let’s say, disappeared one day, just ‘poof’ we were gone, what would you think?” He gives himself a slight smile as he says this, a playful tone. Hoping to cover up how truly curious he is.

Rowan looks around, concerned “I uh… you guys planning on eloping or something??”

“What??? Ew no???”

He looks even more concerned “like if you guys… died…?”

“I didn’t say ‘died’ like- more supernaturally or something” Jax rolls his eyes, looking away.

“Oh… would other people remember you, or would there be traces of you, or would they disappear too”

“They’d still be there, it’s just us, if we vanished! No death, no moving, just one day we’re there the next gone! all our stuff is still there and everything!” Jax explains, beginning to get frustrated.

“Uhm well I guess I would feel confused…? And sad?? I mean that is kinda like dying ain’t it?”

“No cause we’re not dead”

“But how am I supposed to know that…? In this situation”

Jax pauses “yeah” he guessed it was fair enough.

“I would find it weird if BOTH of you vanished” Rowan says.

“Okay” Jax looks away, he pauses, it was somewhat an answer. And Rowan stands awkwardly behind him “and lets say that you get sucked into like a video game right”

“What…??? Is this still in the disappearing world or….??”

“No no, new hypothetical”

Rowan nods unsure.

“You get like stuck in a new world that is in a video game, with npc’s, and adventures”

“-kinda like an isekai”

No-

wait- no-!

Jax stopped in his speech. It wasn’t- he guessed maybe a little- but he refuses to think that he’s in a weird isekai plot.

“No, no nevermind”

.

.

.

It was gangles turn to make dinner (which mostly consisted of putting a bag in the microwave of something, and putting a pan in the oven of something else and then putting them together on their plate).

Jax paced from side to side in the living room.

Thinking.

Mostly about what happened in the nerd shop, and how could he not!!!

Gangle just… gave up like that? Is that what she was doing?? Did she no longer trust those employees? That shop? Or does she not care about freeing the others anymore.

He looks behind the wall, and sees her in the kitchen, waiting for the oven or microwave to beep. He could go up to her and ask.

But he doesn’t.

If it was so important she would be telling him! Wouldn’t she? He’s not going to beg for information, if she wants to be all secretive and whatnot he’ll let her! It’s not his fault she’s probably hiding something important.

He goes back to pacing around the living room.

He doesn’t like the other circus members, that’s a thought he repeated a LOT in his head, but he didn’t want them to stay there. Nobody should want that! It sucks!! He can be mean but not evil.

Gangle on the other hand. Well imagining her being evil is laughable…

Although, she was kinda intimidating at spudsys, but that’s was just her mask… thing? Or it was stress, eh it’s whatever! That’s what it is!

Because he can’t imagine a world or a reason for gangle to give up on trying to save the others.

He shakes his head, then gangle calls him for dinner.

He begans to walk around the wall dividing the living room and kitchen.

He then entered in the room which was in between the kitchen and the living room, on the furthest side of the house, away from the two other rooms. It was small, and had a fireplace, and a little table in the middle. Surrounding it was a lot of collectibles, just like the rest of the house. He hadn’t really been in this room before.

He never really had a reason too. But right off in the corner of it was a door. Thinking back on it gangle never showed him this door, but it was thinner than the others, it must’ve been some closet or something.

He stared at it for more time than he would’ve liked. Before shaking his head, and walking away to join gangle for dinner.

.

.

.

It was dark outside. Jax laid down in his bed, staring at the window.

It must’ve been pasted 10, though Jax didn’t know the exact time, it had been getting darker sooner recently, and he just… couldn’t sleep.

He knew gangle was already in bed, she has to open tomorrow, which of course means he has to get up early, but he didn’t really care, he can sleep in the back until the start of his shift.

He doesn’t think he could sleep if he tried.

He closed his eyes and waited. But nothing happened. Horrible questions came in his mind, like what the others looked like… like what ribbit would’ve looked like.

It sucked.

He ended up opening his eyes and looking down. He couldn’t see his body (of course not, it’s almost pitch black), just barely the outline of his hand as he brought it up to his face.

A very human hand. Gone were his cartoonish gloves and purple 3D modeled arms. They had now been gone for a long time. Still he couldn’t help but feel like he hadn’t noticed it.

The change was almost seamless, yeah there was small differences, gravity pushed harder, and physics were realistic of course, he had hair now.

But looking at himself, and gangle, it almost felt natural, as if that’s exactly how they would’ve looked as humans based on their models.

In his head getting everyone back would be this grand moment, but in his head escaping in general was going to be this grand moment. But he can’t help but wonder if everything will be anticlimactic…

That’s still no reason not to save them, of course. So why was gangle insisting it?

He sat up. He wouldn’t be able to sleep like this.

That’s when he decided to take a walk, putting on the neatest (and easiest) shoes he could, and taking a key for the house with him he leaves his room and approaches the front door.

Gangle is still probably dead asleep, and the only one who seems to have noticed him leaving is the ‘mamas boy’. Who gave him a short meow, and demanded to be pet before Jax left for the walk.

He didn’t know where he was going, instead he followed his old route to work, he knew if by heart.

On his way there he passed by the nerd shop, it stood out like a sore thumb. One light was on in the back of the shop, and he couldn’t help but slow down as he approached it.

Looking closer at the door he noticed all the posters on it, some showing up multiple times. Anime club, art club, bee club(?), and one for a watch buying website. Paired with a cartoonish image (most of which were bees) and bright font for all of them.

He didn’t bother with trying to open the door, instead moving to the side to look inside the big windows.

He didn’t manage to see much of anything. Just a vague light, and a shadow moving past.

Then the door opened.

“Oh! Hey man!! What are you doing out here” it was that employee.

“I could ask you the same thing”

The employee smiled halfway “I work here, I closed tonight”

He guess that made sense.

“I was just about to leave, me and Jen tried uh working the game after close but we got nothing new”

Jax just nodded. He wasn’t really expecting them to get anything, he wasn’t even really sure why he had stopped when he reached the shop. It all felt strange.

“You still want us to look into that game right”

He nodded. He did, he actually really did. Still he couldn’t find it in himself to say anything, not when he knows gangle had disagreed.

“Alrighty!” The employee spoke far too enthusiastically.

A pause

“You need something?” The employee then said.

“No not really” Jax crossed his arms.

“Why are you out here anyways?” They smiled “you never answered”

“None of your-…” Jax paused, then smiled “hey, you wanna see where we found that game”

“Your uh… great grandpas house…?”

“No no- it was… the place he worked at” Jax shrugged, hoping it was a convening enough lie “c&a” he saw the signs for it everywhere.

“You wanna take me to an abandoned building??” The employee asked. And did Jax??? Did he really? Sure, maybe they’ll trip and fall or something he doesn’t know it’s late “your girlfriend okay with that?”

What.

“She not- we’re roommates!!!”

“Oh sorry, I didn’t mean to assume”

“Should be sorry” Jax mumbled “you wanna go or not”

“Well it’s uh…. Weird ask” they look around “nah you know what sure, as long as it’s not too far, I don’t wanna miss bee club tomorrow”

Fine. Sure whatever. That’s a thing.

They began to walk, Jax leading and the employee following “so… your g- roommate, she uh… okay?”

“Why wouldn’t she be.” Jax mumbled. He knew why they were asking.

“Not a fan of your great grandpa huh?” They smile.

“No. I don’t know what’s up.” Jax then says “she probably just don’t trust you” he puts on a smile.

“Aw dang” somehow the employee still smiles, annoying. “I’m treating it the best I can, I know I’m not going the fastest”

“Yeah yeah, I believe you” Jax didn’t know if he really did or not. But the response wasn’t funny enough for him to want to hear whatever the employee had to say. “I do have a question” Jax then said “a hypothetical one of course”

“Oh?”

“If you were like… sucked into a video game, forever no escape” he starts

“Like a isekai?”

….

“Sure.” He then says. “Like an isekai. But the game isn’t some fantasy slop, it’s like… like a virtual world with other people and stuff or something.“

“That’s cool”

“But you’re stuck there forever” Jax says “you can’t die, you… I don’t know, it’s a whole thing!! How would you feel I guess”

“Oh. Uhh I don’t know” the guy starts “I mean it’s kinda cool to be stuck in game, but I wouldn’t miss my friends, especially my sister, she’s the best. You know she-“

“Alright” Jax cuts him off. Mostly because he doesn’t really care to hear him out. But secondly because “we’re here”

“Oh sweet! Anyways my sister, I’m not sure what I would do without her. You know when we were young we were so close. She’s older and she moved to the city” they walked in the building while the employee rambled on “and she came back so changed, ragged I’d say, but I remembered the small town life we always used to love. And when I gave her that bike and showed her the true meaning of Christmas she was so much happier”

“…okay???” Jax then says “uhm this is the place”

“Wow… looks very destroyed”

“Yeah.”

The employee does look around for a while, picking at wires, but everything looks to damaged to take.

“You have a bike?”

“….” He did “yeah… but I can’t ride it”

“I’ll teach you! Your uhm… gosh I don’t think I know your guys’s names, uh your roommate I can teach her too if she has one”

She does. But suddenly Jax feels a little uneasy.

And bored. Very bored.

“Uh yeah maybe one day or something. Anyways it’s getting late, so… let’s kick it”

“Alright!” The employee smiles.

.

He ended up walking back to gangles place, then he fell asleep.

.

.

.

The next days were a lot like the days before.
A lot of work. Late nights, video games. Oven made dinners. And sometimes they would spread out a bunch of paper and she’d doodle character concepts well he came up with ideas of the worst situations to put them in.

But those were all fleeting moments, and in reality there wasn’t too much time to do all they wanted.

Still gangle had smiled, and laughed at a dumb line for metal gear solid (the bisexual vampire got them good). She drew like she did before, but sometimes he’d look at her. And her smile would fade into nothing. Sometimes when she laughed too loudly she’d cut herself off, and barely speak for the rest of the night.

And still the time passed.

.

.

.

But one day after work.

Jax had walked into the hallway to head back to his room, and heard a sound he was somewhat familiar with.

Gangle, crying. Inside her room.

It had stopped him in his tracks. Even though he was quite used to hearing her on the verge of tears and sniffling, full on sobbing was much more rare than you’d think.

They all had their moments in the circus.

Still, crystal clear he could hear the sobs of gangle, despite the door in the way.

He thought about walking off, going into his room and pretending he couldn’t hear it. But he just couldn’t, a dumb part of his head screamed ‘what about the entertainment, don’t you want to see the funny reason why the crybaby is crying’ (a dumber part of his brain thinks ‘what if she abstracts, you could prevent it’).

It’s funny right? He opens the door. He’s just… doing this to be funny or something.

She looks up at him, wordless.

He takes note that she doesn’t seem embarrassed, it makes sense, seeing as her nickname is crybaby. But still it’s strange to him.

“Hey jax…” she mumbles. Sketchbook in her clutch, and tears streaming down her cheeks. She’s been talking in sadder ways before, or mumbling, but every other time in this world he’s heard her talk there’s always been SOMETHING else there. A tinge of a tone that’s a little happier than normal.

Not now. His brain is violently slapped with memories of the circus, of how she sounded the moment after he’d break her comedy mask (he doesn’t want to think about this.)

“Yeah…” oh god he’s the embarrassed one? When did he get so pathetic! He’s not even the one crying “you-” he started then stopped. what was he meant to ask??? What would be funny, he was so bad at this!

Jax decided to abandon what little thought he had, and stopped talking. Instead pushing the door back, so it was cracked, but still not fully closed, and walking forward “what’s up” he sat next to her on the bed.

She tilted her sketchbook away from him. Looking down at it. Then up at him. Before tilting it back, so he could get a glimpse of it.

It was a clearly unfinished group drawing, zooble was front and center, kinger off to the side, to the other side of them was just a sketch, a circle and vague outline of a body and a dress, clearly going to be ragatha.

“I didn’t want to forget them…” she mumbles.

He nods slightly. Looking at the drawing.

He just felt…. Weird.

“I miss…” she puts her head down “drawing with zooble… and… ragathas kindness even if…. And kinger-…” she sniffs trying to say more but words clearly failing.

He doesn’t know what to say. He doesn’t have any real good memories with them. Ragathas ‘niceness’ always seemed like a cover. Zooble hated them and was no fun to be around, linger wouldn’t remember them all anyways so what’s the point in trying to remember him, and pomni… well she seemed cool.

None of this stuff was new. He messed with them, he teased them, pestered them. He didn’t HATE them but the bar wasn’t high.

But of course he wanted them back. And here, he lost sleep over it. And gangle seemed too as well so why did she want to stop the search…?

He continued looking at the drawing.

Everything did seem off. The world seemed strange without ragatha yelling at him, or him trying to poke at zooble, or slowly getting along with pomni, or even kingers screaming.

He wanted them to be free. Of course he did he’s not heartless!

But in a way he guesses… it’s not just the ‘being mean but not evil’ thing, but he kinda missed them too?? They felt real… they still feel like the most real part of his life. That and gangle of course.

He doesn’t know what’s wrong with the rest of the world, his mom is like ragatha but worse, more fake, and Rowan feels like… nothing? And he doesn’t even know the name of any other person.

It has to be his memory, but he does feel the most connected to these people he barely even likes.

… he guesses he likes gangle now, so maybe he’s being to harsh on them. But… it’s whatever.

He looks back at her.

“Well… we’re working on getting them out.” He somewhat spits it out, maybe it is to try to reassure her (though he doesn’t know how much he trusts that nerd guy, much like everyone else (who isn’t gangle) he doesn’t feel much about them.) or maybe he has said it to shame her because of her trying to get them to stop.

She looks down at the drawing.

“I don’t think… they’re coming back” she mumbles.

He shoots her a glare.

“They…. When we were gone” she struggled to speak, tears falling down her cheek “no time passed in this world… if they came back… wouldn’t no time have passed?”

Jax froze.

He looked down at her bed.

That does make sense.

“Maybe they were there then… or came a second later, or even earlier. Maybe they’re already out and we just missed them”

She doesn’t respond.

“I mean we walked out the door together so of course we showed up together!” He then says “who’s to say it’s not just a little off, we left pretty soon after right…??”

Gangle looks down.

“And- we’ll know if that whole ‘looking into the game thing’ works out, we’ll see them, we have too.”

She doesn’t say anything, just looking at her drawing.

He guesses it’s kinda unlikely that they would have shown up before or after them without them realizing anything at all.

“Maybe… maybe you’re right… we don’t know how the exist door worked… maybe they got out” she then says. She sounds less hopeful. And jax feels less hopeful.

“It’s dumb, of course they’d escape… if we were able too. And pomni would have like hawk eyes for an exist you know” jax says.

She smiles lightly. She still doesn’t seem convinced though.

He doesn’t think he is either.

And even if they did get out… he doesn’t think they would’ve….

Ugh! This sucks, this is all dumb, why can’t they just trust that they probably got out, it’s not like jax needs to see them again, he just wants to know they’re fine, but he can’t know that until he sees them.

It all sucks.

And he’s sure they wouldn’t have tried to shove an abstraction through the door, that’s a dumb idea, how would they even have tried that. Even If they did make it through.

His face is wet. Great, now he’s crying. He’s shaking too, and he hates it. He hates that he can’t just let it go, that his mind is running wild. That he somewhat cares for those people, that he just can’t seem to care or really remember anyone outside of the circus. And that he can’t stop himself or control his body at all, and for getting hope in the first place. They’re back right? Why can’t it be as simple as that.

He looks at gangle, and she’s smiling at him.

He doesn’t know what that means.

And he hates it.

“Thank you jax” she mumbles.

He doesn’t respond. Even if he knew the perfect words to say he doesn’t think he could will his mouth open to say it.

“It feels nice… not to be sad alone” she says.

His shaking toned done.

He didn’t understand why, why gangle didn’t think less of him, or why they couldn’t go back to just… well pretending everything was okay… the thing he hated ragatha for.

He was doing it himself, in a way, pretending he wasn’t sad by covering it in anger and hate, pretending he couldn’t like someone to not get close.

He tried to be open, and ‘real’ but he had to make the excuse of it being funny to even go in here.

So he tilted over, to lean on her shoulder “yeah… don’t mention it” he says.

She smiles, then hugs him.

And weirdly enough.

Everything was okay.

Chapter Text

Both gangle and Jax sat in the middle of gangles room, on the floor, with paper thrown about (mamas boy sitting on one of them.) and markers, pencils and an assortment of drawing supplies everywhere.

Jax had two poorly drawn characters on his sheet of paper. He scribbled one out with a red pen, chuckling under his breath.

He shows off the crude drawing to gangle, explaining in depth the plan to violently kill off the characters he scribbled out. Her eyes surprisingly light up, as she reaches for another piece of paper and draws the quickest sketch of the main guy at a graveyard. Explaining that that could be how the character meets the magical cat other character (that of course being gangles idea).

So far their story is about some immortal person that people die around all the time! Just enough violence to keep Jax satisfied, and just enough angst for the crybaby.

They had, surprisingly, got a lot done for the comic (or whatever it was meant to be) so far. His out of left field ideas actually worked quite well with gangles more slice of life and emotional storytelling. With him going ‘then they get guns and have to fight a lake monster, and the main one gets their head cut in half’ and her somehow making that a ‘world building’ moment, it was actually kinda fun?!

Not that he would say that aloud (though he’d be surprised if gangle couldn’t tell). It did feel a bit like the suggestion box, at least on his end, but no one ended up getting mad at him for putting them into horrible (and VERY funny) situations. So it was nice or something.

“So…” gangle then starts “who should they end up with”

Romance! Boring- “i don’t know… Gemma or something” he shrugs.

“Gemma gets beheaded in the medieval arc”

“Ah right” he smiles at the memory.

“You know I’ve been thinking a lot about this” she starts taking as she grabs a sketchbook “and I think a love triangle between the main character, Emmabeth, and Tarro, could work out really well”

Of course, a classic love triangle, the whole comic was drama, bloodshed, and romance at this point! Though he couldn’t deny it was a bit fun.

He had ended up seeing where she was coming from, a best friend, and a rival, it was pretty standard dynamics.

Gangle shows him her sketchbook as she flips through it, depicting different scenes of each of the characters, and how a romance would work between them.

Gangle then flips the next page quicker then Jax could see “NEVERMIND THAT ONE-“

Jax smirks “Ooo! Well now I gotta know!!” He reaches forward. She immediately moves the book (and herself a bit) back.

“Nope- it’s not- it’s not important, that was all- all” she laughs nervously.

“If it’s anything like that anime girl one-“

“WAIT- you- it’s not!!! It’s nothing-!!!” She panics, not noticing Jax had already snatched the door out of her hands in her panic.

“Now let’s see!!” He grins, quickly flipping the pages (but still doing it gently, he doesn’t want to get rid of the work they’ve done or something). Until he reaches the page she skipped passed.

It wasnt really a surprise (for a freak like her it may even be a little toned down then what she’d normally draw). Just a vaguely suggestive pose of two of the background characters they had made for their project.

Though looking into it “oh hey” he laughs “she’s the one that kinda looks like you” he shows off the drawing to gangle (more to gloat that he got the sketch book, he knows gangle knew she’s the one who drew it).

He recognized the character, they had been making a bunch of background guys, this one had died in the beginning, and he thought it looked like gangles self insert (she didn’t really see it until she looked in a mirror then back at the drawing) he even joked they should name the character Maggie.

…which means-

Looking closer at the drawing he then recognized the other figure, after the making of that background character he had made his own, a character that vaguely looked like him (he had horribly drawn it next to gangles character, saying that he was Andy, then laughed before saying they were the best of friends).

This drawing of the character ‘Andy’ probably looked nothing like his crappy doodle, but he can’t deny looking closer it did look a bit like how he looks know.

He gives gangle a glance, she’s bright red “the guy kinda looks like me” he smiles wider “something you’re not telling me” he teases.

She snatches the book out of his hand “NO- NOTHING- I think I’m done for the day”

“Awww you’re no fun” he laughs.

.

.

Jax watched the clock pointlessly, it ticked once, then twice, then three times.

It was not an abnormal occurrence, he tapped his finger on the counter a few times to the ticks.

He’d be getting off his shift soon, Rowan was here, scrubbing some table, his eyes wondered over there.

“It would be nice if you helped” Rowan then said. “I swear you’re lucky melpo likes you”

“Seriously? When’s the last time you got in trouble”

“Well I wouldn’t because- well… I do… my job I guess….” Rowan then trails off “huh… I guess we’re all lucky melpo likes you then”

“What’s that supposed to mean” Jax smiles somewhat.

“She has definitely…. Chilled since… whatever happened with you two”

Jax pauses. “I guess so” he shrugs, “I’m just better like that”

Rowan rolls their eyes, but they seem more playful then anything “how’d all this happen anyways” he glances around “I won’t tell”

“We got really into metal gear solid”

Rowan laughed immediately after “dude I know that’s not what did it”

Honestly, Jax doesn’t really care to try and explain the circus to Rowan (of course there’s the obvious of Rowan won’t believe him) but he couldn’t really care. That kinda what he learned from his late night hang out with that one employee he doesn’t know the name of.

Yeah he’s not throwing Rowan in the deep fryer, but he doesn’t feel a deep enough connection to even try to unpack all of that. Rowan, that one employee, all the customers that come in, even his mom. They all feel like… nothing.

Gangle is the same… or maybe he hopes gangle is the same, maybe hope is the wrong word, what would it be? Projecting?

Maybe something like that, he sees her talking with coworkers and people who come in, and employees, but they never hang out with any of them. Maybe it’s a weird circus thing, but he has a sinking feeling she couldn’t care less about them just like him.

The only people in his dreams are the ones from the circus.

“Ahh well! Seems like it’s time to clock out!!!” Jax grins.

He turns around, heads to the back room and grabs his things, then exits.

He rushes past the counter.

“Hey uh… Jax?” Rowan speaks.

“Yeah?” Jax’s asks.

“Do you like it here?” Rowan tilts his head, kinda like how gangle does.

“At McDonald’s? No?” Jax rolls his eyes, and gives a glance at the dead cockroach on the floor.

“No no” Rowan then says. Jax stands in place for a moment. “In…. The uh… this world”

Jax pauses. Before laughing slightly “what? I-“ he shuts it. Before laughing again “what…?”

“Jax you ready to go!!?” He hears gangles voice, and it’s like a breath of fresh air.

“Yeah!! Meet you outside”

Jax gives one last weird look to Rowan. Before leaving.

.

.

.

It was dinner time again, he had made something tonight. (Which, much like gangle, just consisted of his microwaving premade meals and putting frozen food in the oven, they both work at McDonald’s don’t expect much from them- okay!).

It was rice with some vegetables and chicken in it. Nothing fancy, nothing bad though.

He had finished making the food and placing it on plates when gangle had walked in, he had went up to greet her, and gestured at the bowls he had made.

He then opened up the fridge to grab a soda, looking at gangle (who now held both of the bowls in her hand) he grabbed another one her her.

He places the sodas on the table in the spots they’d sit when they don’t watch tv, before sitting down in his chair.

Gangle walks up to him awkwardly, “so… Jax….”

He glanced at her “yeah?”

She gets out two bowls for them, and scoots one over to his side. “I…. Saw you had a uh…”

His glare hardened, she sat down.

“A dress in your closet, it uh looked like-“ SHE SAW THAT?????

“WHY WERE YOU LOOKING THROUGH MY STUFF” he yelled. Breach of privacy much! Huh????

She jumped in her seat “I- I didn’t mean too- i- it was an accident-“

“HOW?!!!! DO YOU ‘ACCIDENTALLY’ SNOOP AROUND AT MY CLOTHES????????” Forgive him for being freaked out at this!!!

She sinks into herself, sweating. “I was in your room looking for you earlier and your closet was open that’s all—“ she says panicked.

He sighs, really loudly. He doesn’t think he fully believes her (though he may have left the closet door open?).

And to be fair that is exactly something he would do, (snoop in others room that is) but that’s just it. HE would do that, not gangle?!! But it’s whatever. It’s so WHATEVER. It’s chill.

It’s chill.

There was a long pause of silence.

“So…. What’s that about” she finally seems comfortable in talking, she seems like she wants to say more, but holds her tongue.

“I didn’t remember owning it, but it was in my old place, I don’t know. Maybe it’s like important or something” he shrugged. It wasn’t a big deal, he will make gangle believe that, he wasn’t even sure why he brought it!! It didn’t mean anything.

“It kinda looked like your medieval outfit.”

He nodded “yeah…” he was hoping that it was just his imagination. He really has no clue why he had it in the first place. He didn’t remember most of the clothes he had or why he bought it, it just… seemed like nothing anyone would get him (obviously it was nothing he’d buy either).

“So….” She trails off “…are you uhm… going to wear it”

He glared at her “what? Is this like an anime kink or something???”

“W-what??? No—-“ she stammered out. He was actually joking when he asked that, but she was so obviously lying he felt like he must’ve been dead on.

So of course he laughed “what? you own a figure of me too?” He smirks at her, before slyly taking a bite of the food (and it wasn’t bad for a microwave meal!!!).

“NOOO”

“Is that why you put me in that maid dress~” he laughs.

Her face is bright red “no- well-… no!!!”

“Not making a convincing case for yourself~” he grins.

“Forget I said anything…” she mumbled, Jax certainly will not forgot.

.

.

.

Was Jax REALLY going to do this?

After dinner he had returned to his room. He now sat on his bed, staring daggers at the closet door.

Because he wasn’t. He just wasn’t… right…??!!!

It was a dumb idea from a dumb conversation. But still it would be funny? Maybe it would get his mind off of… other things too.

He gets up, walking to the closet, not yet making a choice he opens up the closet door. Just to look at the dress, just to make sure it’s real.

And it is. Taunting him from the edge of the closet. Jax is starting to doubt gangles words that she accidentally saw it, it’s packed tight in the corner. Yeah maybe she did somehow see it from afar but it’s far more likely that she was snooping.

What for? He wouldn’t know. He allows himself to chuckle, thinking that maybe gangle was hoping to find something like this.

He then thought about Christmas, the night of Christmas Eve more specifically. She got him good, (just thinking of that night leaves a pit of embarrassment in his stomach) maybe this could get her back?

He would’ve done this in the circus, he wouldn’t have even hesitated. He’d have one thought that it was funny and he’d already be out there mocking her or something. What changed (his body, of course is the right answer, but accepting that felt like saying his body was important, too important for his liking).

So trying to clear his mind of any thought, he snatched the dress from off the hanger and put it on. (‘It will be funny’ echos through his mind).

Once the dress is on he doesn’t look down, the feeling of it flowing is somewhat familiar still vaguely uncomfortable. He makes his way to his door, and reaches out for the doorknob. Trying to imagine what gangles face will be. (Funny. It will be funny.)

As he does the dress swings by and graces his legs, and for a moment he stands there, holding the doorknob, but making no movement.

His face is wet.

Oh god. That’s embarrassing, his hand shakes, as he quickly pulls it back, instead locking the door, then stepping back from it all together.

That’s dumb. He knows it, still he looks ahead at the shaking hand before him. It’s really dumb, but something in him is scared.

Then a pit forms in his stomach, and his throat gets dry, and he shakes harder as rage consumes him. He takes another step back, legs running into the end of his bed, so he sits down.

He shoves his hand down on the bed, pushing it in the mattress to try to stop the pathetic shaking.

It’s a dress. It’s clothes. Fabric. And here he is getting all worked up over fabric.

But of course it’s not the pink lacy fabric that scares him, it’s going out there. Where gangle is. Because he KNOWS if he goes out there and she makes some dumb comment about it, if he hears anything about a ‘finally’ or a ‘back to normal’ or whatever slop, he’s going to rush back into this room, tear this dress up, and never wear anything pink, pick a flowers , or even make eye contact with a dress again.

And truthfully he doesn’t want that. That case is just as bad as trying to force him into feminine things, well to him it is.

Because it’s always about control, it’s always ‘you have to be a girl’ then when it finally gets through he’s not, it’s ’then you have to be the perfect depiction of a man’ isn’t it?! Everyone wants to control him, to make him do what they want. Trying to force him in a role that doesn’t fit or make comments when he just wants to try something. Why can’t he just try something?!

He’s always had to do something. Had to be something. Always for someone else. No wonder he went so off the rails in the circus. A place with no consequence where he was himself and people could see him as that.

He just hates this. All of it. Being told what to do, what to be, it feels like a lose lose. Like one piece of fabric could destroy his whole sense of self.

Gangle wasn’t making him do this. He knew that, she had asked him too, yeah, but there was no way she would’ve expected him to actually do it. He could just as easily take off the dress and never tell her or even think of this again.

But no one controlled him. He should be able to do whatever he wants to hesitation. So he wipes his face, unlocks the door. And goes outside his room.

.

The look on gangles face was priceless, and to be fair it WAS pretty funny.

She was as bright red as her ribbons were. And had stopped in the middle of her sentence and instead just stared at him for a second.

“I- uhm…” she gulped (and boy did Jax had to contain an evil crackle) “do you want to play uh…metal gear?”

“sounds great” he grins. He felt so strange, why had he even been scared in the first place?.

She nods wordlessly.

She stares at him for a moment. “What’s wrong gangle?” He takes a few steps closer “you seem pretty speechless”

“N-nothing” the classic stutter. She then moves around, as if to make up for her stillness, clumsily trying to grasp for the remote control.

He moves closer to sit next to her on the couch, making sure to sit a little bit closer then he would normally sit (honestly its not hard too, the dress was big and puffy enough on its own.).

She takes a glance at him, and somehow her face becomes more red. She leans forward to grab the controller for the PlayStation.

“So uhm…” she clicked her account and selected the game. “What changed your mind…?”

Jax makes a show to tilt his head (like she normally does) “whatever are you taking about” he grins.

“The uhh… dress, you know you didn’t have to wear it”

“There something wrong with me wearing it?” Jax test the waters.

“NO- no- absolutely not—“ she laughs nervously. Looking at the tv, then back at him.

Her eyes wonder around, she’s clearly in thought.

It’s when her face changes that Jax knows he had to be worried, she suddenly gets a more confident smile “I think it looks really nice on you” she seems to stare daggers into him, looking for a reaction.

Jax, however, knows her tricks! He won’t let her tease him about this “I know” he smiles.

She scoots closer, drats. Fighting fire with fire. (Why did he think the word ‘drats’????).

She just smiles, as the game finally loads she starts to control snake (it’s ‘naked snake’ now (or big boss but ‘naked snake’ is SO much funnier) they’re on the third game. (It was Jax’s favorite because you could eat basically anything).

“You’re pretty” gangle then said. So quickly he almost missed it. She didn’t even look away from the tv screen.

And of course, he was caught off guard that’s all!! (He froze, and probably made a face exactly like gangles when he had first came out into the living room).

She knows what she’s doing that’s for sure. Fight back- that’s what he needs to do!!

“Prettier then you?” He grinned, like it meant nothing to him, like her words had no effect. He wasn’t embarrassed!!! Or flustered or whatever mushy stuff!! She’ll never get the last laugh.

She then looks at him (WAY TOO CONFIDENT-) she looks him up and down (his face is definitely red, and he KNOWS she knows that now-)

“Hmm I don’t know”

“W-what?!!!!”

Her grin only grows. Of course-

“Give me a twirl first then I’ll decide” she had a devious look on her face.

There’s no way he was going to fall into whatever trap she was planning though.

“I would” he says dramatically “but then I would have to move away from you” he smiles, looking closely into her expression.

She smiles harder (a bit more nervous too) but clearly is trying to make it seem like it’s not a big deal.

“I’ll get closer then” and she is definitely a woman of her word. As she shifts to be even closer to him, then moves one of her legs to be up on his.

“Wait is that a rat”

“…huh???” Gangle looks at him, then the ground, before finally looking at the tv, in the game a medium size rat was running about. (Her face changing into a knowing expression).

Jax immediately moves closer to try to take the controller out of her hand “I wanna eat it!!”

She chuckles softly, before just handing him the controller.

In the game he takes the gun, aims and shoots. Then picks up the rat in his animal cage, before going in the menu and eating it. (Then calling one of the characters in game who told him rat facts and acted very grossed out about snake eating it).

Honestly it was the best part of the game.

He had the controls and ran around, slowly progressing the story, and shooting guys and whatnot.

Looking to the side gangle did seem distracted. (Success!!) she was staring at him more then the tv.

“Take a photo it will last longer” he smiles.

“I don’t have a camera” she then says.

“Then draw me” he winks “I know you already do” that seemed to be the right thing to say, because her confident act immediately dropped and she was left a blushing mess.

“I- I don’t- not like” she looks to the side. Clearly thinking on what to say.

“C’mon gangle, draw me like one of your anime girls” he puts a hand on his head dramatically.

“I-“ she continues to blush. Before taking the controller out of his hand, “shut it” she mumbles. Embarrassed.

Oh yeah. He won.

.

They continued to play the game until late.

.

.

Jax woke up, it must’ve been anywhere around 2-4 in the morning.

The tv was still on, with solid snake standing in some room he doesn’t really remember, background sounds still playing.

Gangles in a weird mix of a laying down and sitting up position, his arms are around her, and he’s laying with his head in her chest. She’s dead asleep.

Her arms are lightly around him too.

Oh.

That’s embarrassing.

His heart skips a beat. But it’s strange, because he doesn’t feel hurt (emotionally, physically is another story, the couch isn’t the most comfortable and the big lacy dress is NOT something one really wants to sleep in).

The dress. The snuggling, it was all a lot, but somehow not too much, not in this moment.

He wouldn’t necessarily say he liked the dress, and he’s not really planning on incorporating anything like it into his normal outfits. But it’s not the worst. It’s a different feeling to how he felt about it before at least.

Wearing a dress, doing anything that could be considered feminine, it all left a pit in his stomach, because he knew what would happen if he let it play out.

He liked the color pink and suddenly it’s ’wow finally growing out of it’ or something like that. It felt like letting the others win. Probably why his clothes were so plain and boring in real life (or looked emo). Because he couldn’t do anything without putting his image at risk, without putting his sense of self at risk.

In the circus it didn’t matter he was purple, or wearing pink. Or really anything he did. The world have no consequences, not really at least, nobody knew anything about him to bother him with it. (And honestly he’s sure none of them would, zoobles a walking stereotype and none of them cared… but still he didn’t have to worry. Though they all seem like ‘nice’ people he knows they could’ve still thought differently of him if they knew, even if it was in their minds, it would still be different.)

They all didn’t question who he was because why would they. He gives a glance at gangle, he’s sure she knows, but even now gangle acts like she doesn’t question who he is… it seems that’s why at least.

It’s dumb. He knows it is, and it’s scary, and it’s dumb that it’s scary to him. But it felt a little nice to do something scary, even if he didn’t like it, and still feel like himself.

He still felt like him. Just wearing different clothes.

Geez it’s weird. But it is kinda nice to have the option right? To feel like something like this won’t crumble him to pieces… he was worried it would, he kinda thought it would, and it’s gangle that helped that weirdly enough.

Funnily enough, as much as he joked about her ‘cross dressing kink’ or whatever it is it was kinda nice? No not nice, it was weird as hell to him, and funny as hell too. But it fit in with the, him being him. Just-

Gangle views him how he views him.

Everyone in his life wants to control him, wants him to be what they think he is, what they think he should be.

And he wants to break free of that control, go wild, spite them, but he’s scared. Of proving them right in their control. Of becoming what they want. Or of becoming what they think he is. And not just in gender but distancing himself from losers, acting like he’s so above people to do what? Prove he’s better? Push them away? And refusing to do anything that could be fun if it meant it could make them think they won.

It was nice to have to option to just… he doesn’t know, exist? Not overthink it?

He didn’t know.

He looks up at her sleeping face. It looks dumb.

This whole thing is dumb and stupid.

And he’s thinking some dumb and mushy thoughts and he’s SURE that the only reason why he’s thinking like this is because it’s 3-ish in the morning and he’s tired.

He’s also very comfortable, in a strange, uncomfortable way.

He doesn’t want to move.

So he doesn’t. And instead closes his eyes, and forces himself to sleep.

.

.

.

He must’ve woken up an hour or so later, because it was still dark. Much darker than it was before.

The ps4 had turned off. Leaving only a back screen with a ‘hdmi 1, no connection’ message on it.

He was in the same position, embarrassingly cuddled close to gangle on the couch. And only then did he realize something strange, something he never would have if he wasn’t so close to her.

She didn’t smell like anything.

He knew what her shampoo smelled like (strawberry’s) he had accidentally used it one time in the shower. He had seen perfume on the counter in the bathroom. And even if she had never touched it he knows that people normally just… have a smell to them.

But she was strangely unscented. And he thinks he is too (that one is a bit harder to determine).

He can’t remember what people normally smell like, Caine hadn’t really made anything have a smell unless he deemed it necessary (like the food they ate). But he did remember vaguely that people were supposed to smell like SOMETHING.

Then a dim flash of white appeared, he quickly turned his head to see the source.

And it was the door he had looked at before. The one that must’ve been a closet (because what else could it be?).

The whole thing felt like a horror movie. Like a nightmare. Still he just had to know what made that flash.

Maybe it was a lightening storm outside? And that was the backdoor (it seems like the most reasonable answer, but it didn’t look like a backdoor). Maybe it was a closet with a low battery flashlight still in it.

Maybe it was something funny. He halfway smiled at the thought. Right? It had to be something funny that’s all, and that’s why he has to check up on it.

He slowly shifts his way out of gangles grasp. He was going to the door, he was going to open it, and inside would be some bodypillow, or another scandalous sketchbook, or maybe a raccoon or something. Then he’d tease gangles about it in the morning.

it was something funny.

Well, there was only one way to find out.

He approaches the door. He reaches his hand out to hold the knob, then the tv flicks on.

He immediately turns his head, “this is an emergency broadcast alert. An evacuation warning has been issued in your area. Remain
vigilant of any threats and be ready to evacuate. Gather loved ones, pets, and supplies.” A voice spoke on the television. He stepped away from the door.

The tv had the same message written out on a black background, as the voice continued to speak

“Local authorities in your area have reported an outbreak of an unknown illness from killer bees causing violent attacks.”

He stares at the tv for a second. Looking at the still sleeping gangle on the couch. Should he wake her up? Should they get the cat and leave.

He turns back and looks at the door. Unthinkingly reaching his hand out to open it again.

The voice on the tv gets louder “the infected are not alive. If you or a love one show symptoms of a fever, with a heavy smell of rot. Leave them behind”

What is happening?

He should leave right? Or maybe this is a prank? A hijack? He should wake up gangle.

Then another flash, he sees the white light in the crack of the door.

He just has to check.

“LEAVE NOW! LEAVE NOW!“ the tv chants the moment his hand reaches the door.

He starts to turn the knob.

“Also Santa’s real if you even care”

He opened the door.

That’s when he saw it, the endless void of white, he leaned forward, hand clutched to the door side. He saw the walls of the house he was in. He even saw the circle of the nighttime skybox incasing it.

The tv quiet down, instead it played a low beeping noise. But he couldn’t care less.

The taste of food? Was that really what it had tasted like, or was it just a little bit different to make them believe it. The temperature, was that a thing Caine was always able to do? Their body’s- their models, because that’s what they truly are. Did they even look like this?

Of course they didn’t smell. Of course he had this stupid dress in his closet, and of course Caine would make killer bees start a zombie apocalypse or whatever the tv was trying to tell him at the moment.

Of course it was all too good to be true.

He was at the edge of the world, so far out there was nothing left but void.

Then Jax took a step back.

And closed the door.

Chapter Text

Jax stayed there for a moment staring at the closed door.

The tv beeped in the background, demanding his attention. He didn’t give it. No how could he.

He must’ve been standing there a while. He heard shuffling on the couch, and a groan come from gangle, slightly muffled by the tv.

“Gangle?” Jax asks, not trying to be too loud, but not quite enough to not wake her up.

“H-huh… Jax what’s…” her voice is quite, he turns to look at the couch and sees her looking around, before they look eyes.

She seems tired. And concerned. She blinks once or twice before facing the tv. Her eyes seem to widen.

“The-“ she looks at him “do- we need… to go???” She fumbles trying to get up out of the couch “where’s Artemis”

“Could you come over here” he speaks mindlessly. Not moving, he feels like he’s not breathing… maybe he isn’t breathing.

She gives him a weird look. Nodding slightly before moving to where he is.

She looks at him, slightly concerned, perhaps the worry he feels is leaking out of his words. But for a moment, he can’t help but imagine that everything’s in his head. The void. The door, even the tv.

It’s all not real it can’t be (yeah that’s the problem).

“Could you say a curse word for me”

She smiles, expression still worried “what?” She laughs out, but it’s clear she’s nervous.

“Just- anything, any curse word, could you just say one….?”

A pause

“Uhm… yeah?” She still smiles, but she’s clearly worried why he asked. He would’ve thought it was funny, that she immediately assumed something would go wrong. But this time it might.

She opens her mouth, but instead of any real word coming out a cartoonish ‘bonk’ sound placed. Covering her mouth for a second is a black bar, with Caines smug face on it. Her eyes grew wide and she covered her mouth.

They stood there for a second, in silence.

“Oh.” Is all she said.

Then back to silence. How long they were standing there Jax didn’t know, it felt like hours. Just the endless beeping for evacuation on the tv, and them. Standing there. Quiet.

Then in the distance a snapping sound was heard.

And suddenly the beeping was replaced with silly background music, and the light of the tv turned to blinding bright colorful lights, their house to an endlessly big circus tent and a checker style floor, and simple cartoonish objects that defied physics.

his hair was gone. And he was a little thinner than possible, and he was purple. He felt bunny ears on the top of his head switch.

And gangle was back to a mask and ribbons.

“Hello my rambunctious real people!!!! How was the adventure?!!” The booming voice of Caine shouted at them “do you think it was better, or worse than the medieval one?”

“They went on another adventure?” He heard ragatha ask. Her voice. It was her voice, still as nervous, and smile-y as ever

“Yes!! You see, I’ve implanted a new shinny-er mechanic! The world I sent them too has a prolonged clock! So a minute there is around 0.00001 seconds here!!”

“Oh gosh…. How long were you two gone for?” Ragatha asks, concern filling her voice (to him it still sounds fake. But at the moment it feels like the least of his issues.)

“Well it’s been around 5 seconds since they’ve walked through that door! So around a year!!”

Jax doesn’t respond, how could he? Maybe this was a dream. God now he’s sounding like pomni.

“Are you two… uh okay?” Speaking of pomni, now she’s talking to them.

“I see you’re speechless! No worries, I would be too! You see I found a special discarded code that let me use COPYRIGHTED MATERIAL! I couldn’t get ‘WiFi’ but most shows and games are downloaded in my bank to learn off of! Now I can show you those shows!!”

Jax didn’t care how Caine got tv to work. Or why that explains why every website was down, and his phone was conveniently lost.  Because the switch was just so sudden. Everything-

Gone.

Fake.

“I hate that I had to cut that adventure short! But I loved seeing what fun you two had in it! You seemed to love the shows and games, but more or less than the dragon??” Caine asks.

All his words feel like white noise (he notes gangle doesn’t talk either, he would know if she did, he thinks he could hear her voice if he tried.)

“Now… it did make me very happy to see you stay with the names you have here, even though I do think I did such nice work with your names and… wait where are you going?”

Jax wordlessly walks back to his room. He still remembers where it is. Of course, though a part of him wishes he forgot.

“WAIT DID YOU LIKE THE ADVENTURE” Caine shouts out behind him “YOU DID RIGHT??? ON A SCALE OF ONE TO TEN-“ his voice fades as Jax continues to walk.

He finds the door, with a 2d plaque of his face on it.

He opens it. Enters, and closes it.

The room is brightly colored, highly saturated. And the layout is different than his room. The mirror less childish. And the whole thing felt…

He walks up to the bed, and it’s soft. Unlike how the guest room had been (the bed wasn’t bad, but it was firmer than this).

Still he crumbled down on the bed.

Looking down he was back in the pink overalls (of course dumb*PLINK*, of course! He would’ve NEVER owned pink overalls in real life. That should’ve been his first hint).

And cursing. God. Cursing.

If he was zooble he would’ve immediately realized the world was fake (even if he was pomni or ragatha he would’ve  too). Just so happens him and crybaby curse the least, of course they do. Of course that’s how it played out.

And the dress. God the dress. He KNEW he wouldn’t have had that. He KNEW it. He knew his mom wouldn’t have got it for him, and he knew it was the same one from the adventure, and still he just ignored it (what else was he to do though?!!! What else?!!!).

He shoved his head into his pillow (still unnaturally soft). He puts all the pressure he can into sticking his head in there (so much that it hurts). But it doesn’t matter.

It all doesn’t matter.

Because caine is the one making it hurt. And caine was the one who changed food just enough for him to notice it (but not to make it taste more like real food). And caine is the one who put that stupid name in his head. And his mom.

Caine was the one making her say all of those things.

Who knows if she even acted like that?! Who knows if she even looked like that?!! Who knows if Rowan existed, or if that employee did!

… and gangle and him played right into his hand. They didn’t question what happened to them they just… did the adventure.

He must be the dumbest person in the world. Gangle must be thinking that. There were endless points in time he could’ve suspected this was fake and he blew it.

He was so obsessed with ‘getting’ gangle they hadn’t realized caine was the one with the last laugh (the worst part is caine didn’t even know it. At least gangle would smile and get this glint in her eye before she says something that breaks him… at least she’d do it in a fun way.)

But know it’s all over.

Now he’s back just like this.

And now everything’s back to normal right? Whatever normal is here. There’s no way it can’t be. He has to just… do what he had always been doing. No more tv dinners, or metal gear solid, or late night jokes.

It’s over. It was fake.

The whole thing meant nothing. Everything was just lines on a screen. Code meant to pretend to mean anything. No wonder gangle was the only thing that felt real, she was.

And of course he can’t help but wonder if caine had anything to do with that either. Caine was able to put stuff in his brain. Able to make him know the way home, his ‘name’, his ‘job’ (of *BLOINK*ing course gangle wasn’t his boss?!! That’s so convenient-!!). Who is he to say what’s real and what’s caine trying to make a good story. Caine trying to make drama.

….there was no hope for him.

There was no hope for any of them to escape. Of course there wasn’t. Who knows how much time had really passed, who knows if they could really live in the real world anymore. Maybe their body’s are rotting outside.

And most of all there was no hope for the abstractions in the basement.

.

.

.

The door creaks. He wants to yell, to scream. But he doesn’t. How could he. (It might be gangle)

“Jax…” it’s not.

He doesn’t bother to get up. Or to move in any way.

The lights flick on, and it’s too bright. All of it. He shoves his face deeper in the pillow, trying to block it out.

If he closes his eyes he can pretend the bed is a little bit firmer, he can pretend the ‘mamas boy’ is laying on his bed dead asleep. And he can pretend gangles coming in here to get him up for dinner.

He hears the lights flick off “oh sorry” but gangles not here, and they’re not at home.

Instead it’s ragatha approaching him, probably because no one else was willing to.

“So a year…? Huh?” She awkwardly speaks, he hears her getting closer to the bed “you two were really gone that long?” There’s slight concern in her voice. But he doesn’t take that directed at him (she must be worried it will happen to her.)

So he doesn’t respond.

“Yeah…” she then says “I guess I’d be a little out of it too” he can hear her smile and he wants to repeatedly slam his head in a wall.

Wait he doesn’t need to do that. He can hurt her,  because it doesn’t matter, he could stab her repeatedly and have her never die.

Because the world’s fake….

He makes no effort to move.

“Was the world uhm… bad?” She tries to ask.

It wasn’t. It was the pure opposite. But he’s never going to tell her that.

“Right right” she mumbles to herself, sounding less and less sure. “Uhm Caine said he’s give us a tv… something about uh…. Metal… solid” she chuckles “I don’t know what it means but he said you’d like it”

Of course. Of course he knew all of that, all the late nights with gangle, the laughing about a dumb joke. (Of course he’d tell the others too.)

Ragatha laughs nervously “yeah I get it… now’s probably not the time…” there is then a pause “we’re worried about you…” ragatha then says.

He doesn’t believe it for a second. If they were then ragatha wouldn’t be here because someone else would’ve already volunteered first.

“How’s gangle” he asks quietly, head still stuffed in his pillow.

“O-oh!!!” He hears the smile in her voice “gangle!! She’s uhm- well she’s good” ragatha says, too quickly.

Jax doesn’t respond. Because he knows what that means, she’s bad. Now thinking about it ragathas not the greatest of liars (if his mom really had acted like that then ragathas no were close to similar… still doesn’t mean he has to like her).

“She’s um… well she’s like you”

“So. Not good” he mutters.

“Yeah… I guess not good” she then says.

Another pause.

“Do you want to talk about it”

He didn’t. Not really. He tried to shake his head, but even that was done will little effort.

He could feel her gaze on him, but she said nothing. It had stayed like that for a while. Until he heard her footsteps, walking away, opening the door. Then shutting it.

And he laid in bed, in the dark.

Waiting for the door to open again.

But it didn’t.

.

.

.

The lights turned on in his room, caine must’ve done it, to spite him Jax turns to his side to hide his head in blankets and pillows.

He strained his ears for a second, to try to hear something. Anything. But it seems like the room was empty other than him.

Jax doesn’t think he could get up if he tried, his heads spinning and he just feels so empty (the worst part is caines making that happen, he can’t feel sick, or ill or anything here, he’s not really here. Caines making it happen).

Caine had said that he couldn’t control their minds. But he KNEW it wasn’t true. How? Jax wasn’t a vegan, yet still in that one bar he had been able to make words come out of jax’s mouth.

Maybe Caine couldn’t go in their brain and control what he thinks, but he’s at least able to make him say things he doesn’t want, and put pictures and words in his mind that Jax assumed where his own (like he name, like his appearance, and his directions ‘home’ and to his ‘job’.)

He closed his eyes harder, as he felt the world moving around him, the sound of silly background music faded into his ears.

He felt like he was going to vomit. He was standing up now, in the middle of the main room (caine must’ve snapped him there)

“There you are my little resting rapscallion!!!!  Now that we’re all here we can begin the adventure!!”

Jax looks around, everyone’s looking at him awkwardly (except for kinger of course, who is off in his own little world).

But… “where’s gangle?”

Caine pauses, before… frowning??? (The closest someone with teeth as a head can get to frowning anyways) “she’s didn’t want to see my GREAT and marvelous new idea-!!! I think she’s still in shock from how good the last adventure was”

Jax glared up at him. Though he always talked in the most overdramatic voice in the world he knew that caine thought he was right. “Yeah no. Im going back to my room” he turned and started to walk away, before being lifted up into the air in place by caine.

“Now now!!! I know the last adventure was a plethora of excitement! But we can’t have TWO people miss out on an adventure!!! Now that’d just be silly!!” Caine smiles, and snaps his hand, making a portal “now have fun in the pirate ship!!!” Before throwing Jax into said portal.

Immediately he was tossed into a scene of the most stereotypical pirates, all with swords and fighting off even more stereotypical looking pirates. (Most of which were made up of random shapes, some looked like teddy bears, and the others were familiar npcs from past adventures.)

(He halfway hoped that Caine would reuse Rowan, or ‘his mom’ as a npc so he could stab them repeatedly.) but he couldn’t move. Normally he would’ve loved the violent scene, and grabbed a sword and went after his own teammates.

It’s who he is.

Because that’s who he is now, that’s all he’s ever been.

He was never the guy in that house, petting the mamas boy, playing cringy games, and laughing about them. He was always a tall purple cartoon rabbit. Nothing realistic about him, nothing serious.

He was never the person who laid his head on gangles shoulder while they cried from their missing friends.

He was never human.

The whole time he had been here. And now it’s back to the same. What’s a year in this place anyways. What’s 2 years, or what’s so many years he can’t remember!

He takes a sword and remembers who he is.

Not Andy or whatever dumb name dumb Caine wanted him to live in that (perfect) life!

Jax.

And Jax’s life involved putting on a playful smile and grabbing a sword to swat at ragatha! turning to the camera (or the reader) and chuckling as he massacres everything!!

After all dear reader, didn’t you read the forth chapter?

“she’s most likely a fanfic writer, none of these characters will be safe.”

And all of them just so happen to be characters (in a fanfic no less, wow embarrassing!!).

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So Jax takes the sword, with a smile inflating most of his faces. And he doesn’t think about gangle (other then breaking her happy mask) or the mamas boy (because he wasn’t real) or any other dumb sappy thing he could think of.

And he laughs.

And laughs.

Until that’s the only thing he could hear, and he hunts the others.

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“Jax!!!!” Ragatha screams at him. They’re now in the main hall, right after the adventure.

He doesn’t even care “what you got in the way of my sword!” He smiles.

(Out of the corner of his eye he sees gangle walk in).

He trips her, but no happy mask breaks on the floor, she must’ve not put in on because the glass tears are already dripping from her eyes “whoops! Sorry ribbons seems like you ran into my foot!” He smiles.

She looks up at him.

“Anyways! I gotta rest for tomorrow” he takes a step back “I’ve got big plans~” he chuckles “and a LOT of centipedes” he pretends to mumble under his breath.

“Well… I guess you’re fully back to normal” he hears ragatha mumble.

He wants to leap at her, to bite, to kick. But he doesn’t, instead he smiles and shrugs and walks to his room.

And stays there.

And stays there….

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The next adventure was Wild West. Cowboys and all!!

“THIS IS MY BAR NOW!!” He screams, pointing a gun at zoobles face (the gun looked as if it was made of cardboard, the whole Wild West did).

“It’s actually a tavern” one of the npcs spoke before Jax had shot it in the face. The rest of the npcs run out from the bar, with silly video game like ragdoll physics.

“NOW GET ON OUT!!”

Zooble keeps pouring a drink to the point it’s overflowing. “Ughhh” they then walk out from behind the counter, slowly and sluggishly “*BOINK* you” they attempt to flip him off but that too is covered by a censer bar.

Jax laughs as zooble leaves

Now he has the whole place to himself!

Now he has the whole place… alone.

What to do now? He didn’t really know? He could run after zooble, ask himself why he ever gave them the chance to run away and just shoot them. He could find ragatha, or gangle, or pomni, maybe kingers doing something interesting.

But he can’t find it in himself to move… he doesn’t need them to entertain him. He doesn’t need them for anything!!! He never ACTUALLY missed them… he wouldn’t do that.

He taps the gun against the counter (both of which still look like cardboard). He looks down at the gun.

The bullets (despite what they look like) would most definitely hurt. It would be funny. Make them all constantly feel pain in a fake world where they’ll never die. That’s what he wants right? That’s what he wanted?

This is all for the better. They were never going to escape it would be embarrassing if he forever role-played with gangle someone who did.

He taps the gun against the counter again.

The bar (sorry- TAVERN) doors start to swing back and forth, til gangle walks in.

He puts a smile on his face. And holds the gun up pointing at her.

“Heya ribbons”

She doesn’t say a word (he can’t ignore it, she hates him. He knows she does. They just did everything they did because everything was a mess. None of that was because of real feelings, and none of it was even real. He doesn’t care. He can’t, he won’t pretend too. Everything is back to normal. To what it was)

Gangle walks up to him.

“Wow not even a hello, geez I better shoot you for that one!” He grins harder.

Her expression is in a flat line, and without a falter she walks closer to him.

“Listen, I don’t know what you’re doing but you’re not like… going to act weird about that whole thing before” he gives a chuckle “geez it was all embarrassing!” He looks off to the side.

Still she walks forward.

“Okay then be like that!! I’m not in the wrong you know!! This is how everything is, that’s just how this place works, if you don’t wanna adapt that FINE but let me do… what are you doing??” At this point he feels kinda nervous (kinda shaky, god he’s been shaking a lot, it’s nothing to worry about… it’s nothing.)

Gangle is right next to him, blank face, and she confidently reaches out to hold his arm in place.

His eyes flick (what the hell is she doing??) she then takes the gun out of his hand.

Well he should’ve seen this coming (he SHOULDVE stopped it, he’s better than this. HE knows this place better than her. He’s adapted, this is where he THRIVES.)

She takes the gun. Then a glint goes in her eyes as she dramatically pulls it back, and flicks it around her finger, putting it in her hand, then flicking it around her finger again, then throwing it to the other hand, then spinning it, then throwing it back to the other hand around the finger and… wait.

She smiles “revolver ocelot” she mumbles with a giggle.

Jax is silent for a moment.

Before a dumbly loud laugh overtakes him.

It was a thing they had made fun of. In metal gear solid, one of the characters would do silly gun tricks constantly.

Jax stops laughing.

Because that’s not him anymore (because that him was fake.)

“You’re so dumb.”

“Nope, just you” she smiles.

“What-! No!!! If I’m dumb I’m dragging you down with me!!”

She giggles.

Like nothing he says affects her anymore (because she knows what buttons to push now.)

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Gangles sitting in the corner drawing something (he has to wonder if it’s the guys they made, would gangle even still want to do that comic anymore? He doesn’t. That’s not him anymore, it was fake.)

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There doing a pet salon adventure, a cat that looked a lot like the mamas boy came in. (He left for most of the adventure, and pretended he had been fighting squirrels.)

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Gangles not looking at him anymore.

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Jax can’t leave his room today. Caine hasn’t snapped him away and he just can’t leave the bed in his empty room. He just can’t.

The door opened, the footsteps sounded light (like ribbons.)

“Jax…” gangles voice is soft. (‘Finally’ he wants to scream, but he doesn’t. Because that’s not who he is.)

“Yeah…” he mumbles.

He sits up, but doesn’t turn to face her.

The rooms dark, he can tell light is flowing in from the open door. But then the door creaks and the light fades.

He hears her sniffle behind him. His frown deepens. He snaps his head the other way, so she couldn’t see him if he tried.

All of this, escaping, then getting put right back here.….

He’s crying again. And it sucks. Because of course it does. Because of course. Just because whatever! (He hate that she’s in here now, he waited for her to come in here, but now she’s here and he hates it. Why can’t he stop crying?!)

of course this would happen. Of course it would happen to them.

He thought he could accept he could never go back. But now…

The bed shifts lightly, and he knows she’s sitting on it next to him.

“What do you want-“ he mumbles. His voice rough (god he’s a mess). so much for pretending he wasn’t crying.

She doesn’t respond.

“It was all fake anyways… none of it matters anymore” he tries his best to keep his words emotionless. But still the sadness and spite bleed through them and he feels so hopeless. He can’t tell the obvious and he can’t stop tears from falling down his face.

“Yeah… I know” gangle then says. Another pause passes “I should’ve known”

He understands that. He guesses in a way they were both in that together.

“I really should’ve” gangle then says “I mean it’s… I never should have believed for one minute you’d name yourself Andy”

A surprise cackle exits Jax’s mouth.  His face still covered in tears, and he looks back at gangle and she’s smiling. “You’re-“ he chuckles “you’re so right-“ he continues a wet laugh “my name- he made me believe my name was ANNE- and I decided to call myself ANDY?? Who would do it” his smile came naturally (too naturally for his liking, but it was still a smile.)

Suddenly gangles eyes widen “ohhh that’s what she was doing?!!”

“He put my name as Andy lagomorph-“ Jax laughs out.

“I wasn’t going to… but isn’t that the uh… name for a bunny or something” she then mumbles out.

“Oh my god you’re so right- wait- does Maggie melpo mean anything?!” He then asks. (Why is she making it so easy to talk about).

“Melpo is one of the uhm theater type masks names…. I uh think…?”

“God of *ting*ing course it is”

He smiled at her, but still something in him sank. Who knows whatever tricks Caine might unknowingly pull on them. How much of their mind is real. And how long they’ll all last. (And just talking to her, just laughing over what was… well it wasn’t going to magically fix all his issues.)

He doesn’t know how long he can do this.

He just doesn’t know.

He doesn’t think he has much longer.  (She won’t like him for much longer either.)

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