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The summer heat lulls the usually bustling town to sleep. The streets are normally covered with people – singing, chatting, going about their day. The sun pushes everyone inside, and with them the liveliness – but not for long. Once the sun starts inching downwards, the temperature dropping to a bearable degree, Vivid Street comes back to life. People eagerly hang out outside, and the familiar sound of chatter over live music breathes life into previously quiet streets.
An is no exception – while they remained inside Weekend Garage for practice, as Akito complained that moving spots only wastes time, she insisted on walking Kohane back home. Dad wanted to drive her back, but An quickly objected, and she received Kohane's grateful smile in return. It's a sight she never gets tired of seeing.
Right now, they stroll through the busy streets, soaking in the atmosphere; summer vacation freed up schedules of all teens, so there's plenty of young voices wanting their song to be heard. Of course, the locals don't let them hog all the glory. An can make out a few familiar voices, echoing around the alleyways, mixing with cheers and laughter. It always warms her heart, seeing the smiling, excited faces of her town.
She and Kohane take a right, slowly making their way towards Kohane's home. With the leisurely pace, it'll be a good while before they make it there. The sun is already almost done setting, the last yellow hues giving way to deep blue.
Kohane had told her once, on their camping trip, that her hair looks just like the night sky, and that she likes to look at it in place of the actual night sky in the city, where it's covered with artificial light.
An remembers that moment clearly. She recalls how soft Kohane's voice was, how the cicadas and other bugs played their buzzing melodies. She remembers Kohane's face, cradled by the moonlight, and how it danced across her features when she spoke, when she smiled at her. Most of all, An remembers how her heart squeezed up with the need to say something, to confess, to kiss her face just like the moon was in the moment. But she didn't, and she won't listen to such urges, can't give in.
It's especially hard in moments like these; when An is pulled out of her thoughts by Kohane pausing. Instead, she dives into a side alley and takes An with her.
“An-chan, look! I haven't seen them here before. Let's listen to them, even for one song,” Kohane asks, her smile lit up and highlighted with neon pink from the sign she's standing under. The color suits her, but in An's opinion, she looks great in every shade.
“Of course, Kohane!” An pulls her close to her side. From here, she can smell Kohane's perfume: sweet, floral and peachy. It fits her painfully well, accentuates her softness and sweetness. An wonders, briefly, if her lips are as soft and sweet too.
With Kohane distracted by the performer, An allows herself to bask in Kohane's closeness, to study her soft features covered in neon. She loves walking with Kohane, spending time with her and seeing how her face changes every time.
She doesn't like, however, how Kohane's face drops once the performer finishes their song. She starts to walk away, and when An sends her a questioning look, she only sighs.
“I need to be home soon. We can't stay any longer.” Her pouty face is adorable, but An can't stand seeing her sad, so instead, she grabs Kohane's hand.
“Let's come back here tomorrow. We'll convince Akito to let us leave a little earlier, and find them again, hm?” An starts to swing their hands as they walk away.
“Hehe. I'd like to see you successfully convince Shinonome-kun to let us leave practice early,” Kohane giggles, and An can only smile at her own victory.
“Don't worry, I have a secret weapon,” She leans in close to Kohane's ear. Her hair smells nice, too. “It's called “pancakes on the house”,” She whispers.
Kohane's delighted laughter is her only response. An revels in the sound, lets it wash over her.
“I'm not sure your secret weapon is strong enough,” Kohane replies, still giggly, “And I like practicing with everyone better, anyway. But thank you.” Kohane's pearly smile stretches her lips wide, puts dimples in her cheeks. An never wanted to kiss a face more.
“Anything for my partner!” An pulls her in closer. Their arms brush against each other, sending sparks underneath An's skin. She wants Kohane in her life, forever, even if that is just a selfish fantasy.
Eventually, Kohane will find a lover, and as she spends more time with that person, she'll have less time for An. Slowly, they'll drift apart, until ultimately, Kohane leaves.
And An knows, deep down, that she could never be that person.
An annoying voice in her head, one that sounds suspiciously like Akito, scolds her and tells her that confessing wouldn't end badly, that Kohane could love her back. That a simple sentence could solve her problems.
But it's not that easy, is it?
Confessing is final, a permanent shift in their dynamic. And while it could shift for the better as they start dating, the word “partner” gaining a new meaning – it could change for the worse if Kohane rejects her. They'd grow awkward, distant, and Kohane would leave.
An wouldn't be able to handle the heartbreak.
She'd do anything to keep Kohane at her side, and the risk that confessing brings with it is too big. If Kohane is going to leave, it better be later than sooner. An isn't going to chase her away with her own feelings.
Kohane nudges her gently, and guided by her, An looks up; they've long since left Vivid Street, having now arrived at the much darker residential district where Kohane's house is. Above them, the moon hangs in the sky, now visible without the taller buildings obscuring it.
It's crescent face stares at An and her twisted feelings, and she wants it to look away.
“Tonight is really nice, I wasn't expecting that we'd be able to see the moon. The forecast said it'd be raining all night.” Kohane comments, looking up. An can't stay mad at the moon when it curves just like Kohane's pigtails do.
“We must be lucky then, hm?” An squeezes Kohane's hand. “We should probably hurry in case the rain clouds come. But the moon is beautiful, isn't it?”
Next to her, Kohane pauses. An looks over at her, worried that something's wrong. But Kohane is just looking at her, a weird mix of hope and confusion on her face.
“Don't you agree?” She asks, uncertain. Did she do something wrong?
“Ah, sorry. I just misunderstood something.” Kohane's face falls, and she takes her hand away. Her step hurries, and An quickly catches up to her.
The air turns heavy and tense between them. An doesn't know what she did wrong, but she does know that she just ensured that Kohane will leave sooner rather than later.
She curses the moon's crescent, curved into a cruel smile.
Once they're in front of the Azusawa residence, Kohane offers her a small goodbye before hurrying inside. An is left behind at front of the gate, alone to figure out the storm in her head.
What did she do wrong?
The question echoes around her mind, drowning out the sounds of the city as An slowly makes her way back home. She doesn't know how to fix this, how to face Kohane tomorrow morning and spend the whole day with her for practice.
Maybe she should try to talk to someone about it.
She stops to take her phone out of her pocket. She quickly unlocks it and starts to look through her contacts, scrolling through the list until she finds someone she could talk to.
Her finger hovers above Akito's contact. Despite being an idiot, he's extremely good at recognizing how someone is truly feeling at any moment, to a degree that terrifies her a little. Maybe he'd know what made Kohane run away from her.
She swipes to open their message log and begins typing.
The stupid one
>you up?
She looks anxiously at her screen, waiting for him to reply.
The ugly one
yea<
need smth<
The stupid one
>yes
>come to vivid street
>im omw back to dads from kohanes
>i need to talk to you
>i think i fucked up
She shifts her weight from one foot to another, waiting for him to say something. She needs someone to talk to, and she's not sure if anyone else would be able to help her.
The ugly one
alr<
see u soon<
A weight lifts off her shoulders with those two messages. She pockets her phone and continues to slowly trudge along the route she's taken many times before. A route she might not get to take again.
She can feel the moon on her back, curled into a mocking smile on the sky.
She's grateful to duck into alleyways surrounded by taller buildings. From here, the moon can't see her. She wonders how long it'll take Akito to show up; his presence would be a distraction, a comfort.
She makes it to the outskirts of Vivid Street when she spots a familiar figure running towards her. She waves to him, and after maybe half a minute longer Akito is finally in front of her.
She takes a good look at him and bursts out laughing. His hair is sticking up oddly from a hairband that he probably wore at home, there's cream smudged on his cheek and most of all, his tee is on backwards. She watches Akito pull out his phone and check himself out in the screen; her laughter melts into hysterics, knees buckling under her, as he ducks into the nearest street with red cheeks. It's heartwarming, really, that he rushed to her aid like this.
He comes back out into view after maybe a minute. His shirt is on properly, and his hair and face are in order. He rolls his eyes and offers her a hand, which she accepts. It's a comforting warmth, and as her laughter dies down, it helps keep the breakdown at bay. Akito pulls her to her feet and starts to lead her somewhere. At first, she's not sure what destination he has in mind, but a few familiar streets later she recognizes it as the way to their park. It should be empty at this hour, and An appreciates the concern for her privacy.
Akito doesn't talk while he's leading her to the park. He's very blunt and to the point, and she assumes he'll start talking once he knows what's up. An isn't sure if she's grateful for this or not; while their footsteps and the city aren't enough to fully drown out her mind, she's not sure she could handle idle chit-chat either.
At least his hand hasn't left hers; while she normally wouldn't allow this to go on for so long, not with Akito (and she's sure he wouldn't normally hold hands with her either), right now his warm and worn palm is the only thing keeping her from spiralling. Her crisis can wait until they're at the park.
Finally, the familiar gate is in front of them. Akito opens it for them, then steps inside. While An expects him to lead her to their usual practice bench, he takes a turn for the playground instead. They stop in front of the swings, where Akito finally lets go of her hand. She giggles a little when she sees him sit down on one of the swings.
“Really?” She asks, walking over to the other swing and sitting down.
“Really.” He sounds a little annoyed, and a little exasperated. An takes it as a victory. “Me and Ena used to play on the swings a lot.”
Oh. That's not what she expected to hear. She files that tidbit of information away in her mind, to tease him about it later. Although, she understands why he said it, and it does make her feel a little better about the conversation they're about to have. “That's nice.”
“Yeah.” Akito swings himself a little, his feet barely leaving the ground. An does the same. She has to admit, it is a little fun.
“Ready to tell me what happened?” He asks. An can feel his eyes on herself, curious and piercing. She's tempted to curl away.
“I don't know,” She says, gripping the chains of the swing tighter, “I don't get it. One moment we're talking like normal, and then she suddenly starts acting weird.” She looks up, her eyes meeting the moon. Her swings bring her a little closer to it, so she stills.
“What were you talkin’ bout?” Akito continues to swing, unbothered by the mocking crescent he keeps getting closer to.
“The weather!” She bursts out, “We were talking about the fucking weather. And she started it, too, and I don't know what I said to make her mad!” She feels something hot fall down her cheek. The tear's arch curves like the one hanging above her, and she angrily wipes it off.
“What was the conversation about exactly?” Next to her, Akito stills. His tone is low and warm and comforting; it’s a sharp contrast with the chill of the barely-present moonlight and the cold neons of the city.
“She was surprised to see the moon in the sky, said that it's nice and also something about rain during the night,” An says, spits out her frustrations along with the words, “I told her that we should hurry, but agreed with her that the moon is pretty. And that’s it. She started acting weird after that.” She kicks away from the ground, pushes some of her energy into the dirt. It makes her feel marginally better.
“An,” Akito starts, slow and careful. She looks at him, hoping to receive her revelation. “What exactly did you say to Kohane about the moon? Tell me the precise wording. 's important, promise.”
An frowns at him, but obliges. “I said something like “But the moon is beautiful tonight, isn't it?”. Why does that matter?”
Akito sighs, a long, exhausted sound. Then, he looks up to the moon, as if in prayer. “That phrase has a secret meaning. Tellin' someone that “The moon is beautiful, isn't it?” is an indirect love confession.”
No.
That can't be true.
He has to be joking, right?
She laughs, curling down to her knees. This has to be a joke, because she couldn't have ruined her chance with the girl of her dreams with an accidental confession. That's not possible.
“That's a funny joke,” She comments in between giggling breaths.
“I'm not joking, An.” He sounds serious, and so empathetic, An can only slide off her swing onto her knees and sob.
She's done for.
Kohane's reaction makes sense now. She pulled away and hurried home. She was disgusted, must've been. Why else would she run off? An's hand itches for Kohane's soft palm in hers. She knows that was the last time they held hands.
Would Kohane be able to look her in the eye now?
Would An be able to look at Kohane at all?
She scared off her partner, her friend, her crush with a confession that wasn't even intended. She's never felt more pathetic in her life.
She feels something warm settle around her, and a fresh, citrus fragrance envelops her. She looks up to find Akito crouched in front of her, his hoodie draped around her shoulders. He silently pulls her into a hug; An fists her hands in his shirt and sobs into his chest. One of his hands leaves her back, only to settle on her head instead and begin to gently pet her. It's soothing, and it reminds her of what Nagi used to do to comfort her.
She needs to speak, she needs to say something, but all that leaves her mouth are muffled cries. Akito remains by her side, a steady rock against the tides, dancing however the moon pleases.
Slowly, her eyes dry out. Once she feels like she's ready, she pulls away from him.
She takes a deep breath to steady herself. “What do I do?” She croaks out, wiping tears off her cheeks.
“Do you love her?” Akito asks, making her choke; she coughs a little as he slaps her back. What a ridiculous question.
“Obviously!” She defends, then pauses. Maybe she should say something more, if the purpose of this is to talk things through. “I love her a lot. Not only as a friend or a singing partner, but also romantically. She pushes me forward, and is so kind, and adorable, too. It's hard not to.” An can't help the way her tone softens when she talks about Kohane. “But she doesn't love me back.”
“And why not?” Akito starts rubbing circles into her back. “To me, it seems like you're both head over heels for each other.”
An frowns a little at that last comment, punching Akito's chest. “Hey!” He only lets out a small laugh, more of an amused exhale. “And she doesn't. She ran off once I accidentally confessed. She probably hates me.” The thought makes her eyes well up with tears again, which she furiously blinks away.
“Did she run away without a word?” Akito continues his soothing movements, and An thinks back to that moment.
“Well, she took her hand away from mine and hurried towards her house,” An starts, “But she did say she misunderstood me. After I said it.”
Akito hums, “She must know the meanin' of the phrase, then. I'm surprised you didn't.”
“And how do you know it? I've seen your notebooks, covered in lyrics and doodles. You certainly don't know it from literature class.” An fires back, suspicious. If she plays her cards right, she might get another interesting fact about Akito to weaponize later.
“One of my mangas had a romance subplot,” Akito huffs out. An doesn't believe that that's the whole truth. “Anyway, don't change the topic. She probably thought you were confessin' to her, and was disappointed when you weren't.”
“Are you sure? What if she's disgusted by me?” An winces when her voice cracks on the second half of the sentence. It's a terrifying thought.
“Why would she hate you?” Akito asks. An is about to tell him off for asking stupid questions, but before she can, he speaks again. “D'ya really think she'd hate you for being gay? For being into someone you spend all your free time with, even if that someone is herself?”
An shrinks a little, because Akito's right. Kohane is too kind to hate her for that, and An shouldn't be thinking like this.
“Sorry,” She mumbles out, ashamed.
“‘s okay.” Akito takes her chin, forces her to look into his warm, but fierce eyes. “Listen. Think this through, ‘kay? You don't have to act right now, but ya better make up sooner than later. Even if she doesn't love you back, which I doubt, at least explain the misunderstanding. Leavin' things like this will make it worse.”
“Okay,” She nods weakly in his hold.
Akito lets go of her and stands up. He reaches out a hand, again, which she accepts, again.
“C'mon, we should start gettin’ home. You need some sleep after that.” He pulls her to her feet, but doesn't let go of her hand just yet. “Anythin’ else you wanna talk about?”
An thinks for a moment, then shakes her head. She doesn't think there's much else to say, the only thing she needs to do is get over herself and act.
“Thanks, Akito.” The words don't come easy to her, never really did; they usually express gratitude in different ways. But right now, she needs Akito to know how much he's helped her.
Akito, predictably, rubs his neck and looks away. “Don't worry ‘bout it.”
He looks back to give her a small, encouraging smile – the corner of his mouth lifts in that same way she used to find annoying, back when they first met. Now, she smiles back at him, even if she's still uncertain, she feels a lot better.
Their nice little moment gets ruined by the rain.
An hasn't even realized when the moon got covered up by the clouds. Next to her, Akito lets out a very colorful string of words. She can't help but laugh.
“Keep the hoodie. I'll run home. See ya tomorrow.” With that, Akito turns around and takes off.
“Bye!” She calls behind him, zipping up the hoodie and pulling up the hood. It's soft and warm, and it keeps her company as she hurries home.
Her footsteps echo around the empty streets in tandem with the thoughts circling her mind.
Despite the clouds, she can still feel the moon's chilling smile on her back.
♡
Kohane's heart keeps up the instrumental beat even after the music stops.
She doesn't feel the best, after yesterday; it's obvious in her singing. She's asked to redo this song again and again, hoping to get it right.
It still doesn't sound like it should.
Why are her stupid feelings getting in the way?
She's getting worked up over nothing, quite literally; An's words from yesterday meant nothing, were nothing more but an accident.
Deep down, she knows that's why it hurts so bad.
The entire time, from morning until now, they've been stealing glances at each other; one would catch the other staring, and the awkwardness would only grow. It's almost palpable, a thick wall between them.
Kohane finds herself wanting to punch it.
The words never come to her, locked away in her mind. All the “Do-you-really”s and “Did-you-mean-it”s circle round and round, like a carousel of mockery.
“D'ya wanna continue?” Akito suddenly asks, startling her a little.
“It's quite late, we ended up practising longer than we planned. I think I should start heading back now,” Aoyagi answers first, after checking his watch.
“Crap! Dad asked me to help out at the cafe, sorry, I gotta run.” An answers next, fumbling to grab all of her things. It's charming, and Kohane hates herself for thinking so.
It's that same charm that made her fall in love with An.
But An doesn't love her back. Even if yesterday's confession was accidental, she hasn't said anything to explain herself. Surely she knew what she was saying, right?
“Oi, Kohane,” Shinonome startles her again. She really needs to get herself together and stop zoning out. “Want me to walk ya back?”
“Please,” She offers him a grateful smile, “My parents will be happy to know you're the one walking me home.” As much as her parents like An, they always worry about her walking back to Weekend Garage alone.
At least that problem has solved itself now. An isn't going to walk her anywhere anymore.
Akito huffs out a laugh. “They're only ever happy to see me if I'm your guard at that moment.”
“That's not true!” Kohane protests.
“You are very scary, Akito,” Toya adds on, “And Azusawa, didn't you say your dad called Akito a “guard dog” at one point?”
“Wh– When'd that happen?” Akito sputters.
“A–Ah, it was a while back now! Nothing to worry about, Shinonome-kun. My parents love you.” Kohane starts to gather her things, hoping she salvaged her parents’ reputation in Shinonome's eyes.
“Come to think of it,” Toya continues, amused, “You are kind of like a guard dog. You always walk in front of us when we're moving through a crowded area, and you always do so with a scowl on your face.”
Kohane looks over her shoulder just in time to see Akito's face go red. She giggles despite herself and the fact that Aoyagi isn't exactly helping her situation.
“And you always are on high alert, too!” An adds on, and Kohane looks over to see her lingering in the gate. “If you had dog ears, I bet they’d be standing up all the time!”
Kohane can't help but laugh, and she feels a bit better when Toya joins in with her.
“Stop talkin’ nonsense. Don't you have a dad to help out?” Akito frowns. “Where'd ya even get the idea from?”
“Ha, wouldn't you like to know!” An's self-satisfied smirk makes Kohane's heart squeeze a little. Kohane would love to squeeze it back, until it stops doing these things. “And I'm going, bye bye!” She offers them a wave before rushing off.
Kohane can't help but watch her figure get smaller, until she disappears from the horizon once she takes a right. Her eyes remain trained on the spot where An just disappeared from her vision.
“I’ll be going now, too. Goodbye, Akito, Azusawa.” Toya offers them a wave of his own, and it takes Kohane a few seconds to wave back.
“Let's get goin’,” Akito says next to her. She nods, and after glancing around the park to confirm they haven't left anything behind, they start to walk towards her house.
For some reason, every step feels harder than the previous one. She has to put all of her energy into not stumbling, and it's not like she has a lot of it in reserve after their practice session. All of that for nothing, as she couldn't even improve.
“Everythin’ alright?” Shinonome asks, startling her.
“Ah, I'm fine. Just a little tired,” She responds. Her words couldn't be further from the truth, but she needs to move on instead of crying over herself.
She feels Akito's eyes on her, studying her carefully. After a moment, he stops walking and takes off his backpack. Kohane stops to send him a questioning look, especially when he puts the backpack on in front of himself, then crouches down.
“C'mon, I'll carry you,” He offers, “Ya seem tired, and if you collapse when walkin’ with me, your parents will kill me.”
Kohane stares blankly at Shinonome for a few moments, before his words finally get processed by her sluggish brain.
“Are you sure? Won't I be too heavy?” She asks, looking between Akito and her feet.
“Nah, ‘s fine. I've done push-ups with Toya sittin’ on my back, I can give ya a piggyback ride, no problem.” Akito motions forwards with his head, and hesitantly, Kohane gets on his back.
“You've done push-ups with Aoyagi-kun sitting on your back? That's amazing,” Kohane praises as Akito stands up and resumes walking towards her place. “Will you show me sometime?”
“Sure.” Shinonome turns his head to look at her. “So, what's been buggin’ you?”
Of course, Akito sees right through her. It's to be expected from him, but she just needs to move on past her feelings, not worry about them.
“It's stupid,” She starts, letting her head drop onto Shinonome's shoulder, “An-chan confessed to me yesterday, on accident. She didn't even know she was doing it,” She sighs, “And now everything’s weird.” She feels a little lighter, now. The gentle swaying up and down with Shinonome's steps also helps her remain calm.
“Were you hopin’ she was serious?” Shinonome asks. His bluntness startles her a little, even if she knows that's how he usually is.
Kohane nods, resigned. “I don't know what to do now. She found out what it meant, because she's been weird all practice, but I don't know whether I should hope for something or prepare for the worst,” She admits. She wants to believe An will confess to her properly, but would she really love her back?
For a moment, Akito is silent. Kohane takes that time to look around them, finding that they're already in the residential district. Above her, the moon curves into a pitiful smile, suited for her miserable situation.
“Maybe she needs some time?” He finally says, and Kohane looks back at him. “Maybe she realized she accidentally confessed to her crush, and needs a few days to recover from being such a loser,” Akito chuckles to himself, and Kohane lightly kicks his side.
“Don't be mean to An-chan,” She chides, because despite her current crisis, she won't let Akito get away with this.
“She won't even know I said that?” Akito shakes his head, his fluffy locks tickling her. Her face scrunches up and she pulls away. “But I mean it. Give her a few days, and I'm sure she'll talk to you. She cares about ya a lot, so findin’ out what she accidentally said probably shook her a bit.”
“But what if she doesn't?” Kohane can't help but ask. She doesn't want to stay like this forever, standing on her tiptoes on the sharp peak of the crescent moon, forever uncertain.
“Then you go talk to her,” Akito says, as if that was so simple. “And if ya don't, then I'll have to intervene, because this will only continue to affect our team.”
Kohane can't help but giggle at Shinonome's tone, so similar to a mother telling her arguing children to make up.
“What's so funny?” He asks, his face creasing into a confused frown.
“Nothing,” Kohane replies, still giggly, “I promise to talk to An-chan, Mom,” She continues to laugh, even though in the back of her mind she remembers that An was the first one to call Akito that.
“Oi!” Shinonome calls out, his voice annoyed but still fond.
He lets go of one of her legs, making her yelp, and steals her cap off her head to put it on his instead. Then, he reaches out to ruffle her hair, and she dodges, but her enthusiasm only makes him stumble. He barely catches his balance in time, grabbing her leg again and patting it apologetically.
“Sorry. Almost dropped ya.” Akito sounds genuinely guilty, and it makes her feel bad, especially when he's been so helpful and kind this evening.
“It's okay. I’m sorry too, I made you lose balance.” Akito starts to shake his head, so she takes her hat back and ruffles his hair instead.
Her rough ruffling quickly turns into gentle petting, because his hair is so soft and fluffy and he doesn't normally let any of them touch it. Right now, she's in a position she can't waste.
“Kohane.” He tries to sound exasperated, but she can tell that he's enjoying it too. “Stop that.”
“Are you sure you want me to?” She asks, and he gives her a resigned sigh in response.
“Anyway, I'm sure ya will be fine. You matter too much to each other to break apart over this.” Akito turns his head to look at her, and Kohane nods.
“Thanks, Shinonome-kun.” She drops her hands to put her head back onto his shoulder, and after a few more minutes, they're in front of her house.
She can see two worried shadows in her kitchen window, backlit by the light. She waves at her parents, who wave back.
“Take care, Kohane,” Akito says as he places her back on the ground. She holds onto him for a moment, to make sure she won't fall over, then lets go.
“Be careful on your way back.” She opens her gate and hesitates. “And thank you, again.”
“Ah, ‘s nothin’.” Akito scratches the back of his neck. “See ya.”
“Good night!” She calls behind him, closes the gate and heads towards her front door.
The moonlight walks her to it, the moon's crescent a gentlemanly smile. Kohane can't help but find the curve of it a fake expression.
♡
An scrubs the glass in her hand. There's a spot on it, and she's going to remove it. And she's not going to think about Kohane while she does it, because she needs to continue to help out at Weekend Garage.
Her mind, of course, refuses to listen.
Today's practice was tense and awkward. She kept messing up, not sounding how she wanted, and Kohane was too. Akito was constantly looking between the two of them, and Toya also noticed something was up.
It would be easier if she knew how to fix this mess.
Even if Akito is right, and Kohane wanted her to confess, how does she even begin the conversation now?
“Hi Kohane, sorry I gave you false hope on accident back when I was walking you home. By the way, I do love you, sorry for the confusion.”
Absolutely ridiculous. An can't do something like that, she needs to make up for what she did and do something nice for Kohane.
“You're gonna make a hole in the glass if you keep going at it.” An startles when she hears Dad's amused voice. She quickly puts down the glass she was wiping and picks up a different one.
“Sorry! I totally zoned out,” She apologizes, and hurries to catch up on all the glasses she's yet to wipe. She hasn't realized before how big the pile has gotten.
“Why don't we swap for a while? You know what to do at the counter,” Dad offers.
Normally, she would jump at the chance to not do the washing, but right now, she needs time to think. Having to deal with customers and small talk is the exact opposite of what she wants right now.
“Is something up?” Dad asks, standing next to her to take a good look at her.
“I just need to think through some things,” She answers, hoping he won't pry into her vague response. She doesn't need a conversation about her disastrous love life with her dad, and especially not while she's polishing glasses.
“Do you wanna talk about it?” He offers, because of course he does.
An shakes her head. “Already talked to Akito. I can figure this out on my own.”
They both fall silent, for a moment. The only sound can be heard from the cafe, where voices mix with clinking glasses in a familiar beat. Despite that, the noise feels overwhelming.
“You're free for tonight. Go take a walk, clear your head, and figure out whatever you need to.” Dad takes the rag out of her hands and pulls her into a brief hug.
“Are you sure? I can stay and keep washing,” She hates washing the dishes, but she'd feel bad if she left Dad alone to deal with the cafe, all because of her situation.
“It's fine. Go before I change my mind,” He chuckles, pushing her lightly towards the back door.
An checks her pockets for her phone and keys, then takes off her apron and hangs it on its hanger. After that, she's quick to give Dad a “Thanks!” before rushing out the back door.
The street outside the cafe is much quieter. Of course, there's plenty of people around, but their voices and laughter don't grate on her ears as much.
She looks up, driven by an impulse to do so. The moon hangs high in the sky, towering over the building. Its crescent smile calls out to her in curiosity and smugness. She's going to change its expression even if it takes force to do so.
Despite her gloomy mood, she has to admit the night is lovely; the air is warm and perfectly pleasant. She can't help but wish Kohane was with her.
Maybe that's what she should do. Invite Kohane on a walk, if the weather stays nice, talk to her someplace familiar, following familiar steps.
But doing something they don't normally do might make it easier to talk about something they don't normally talk about. She could throw together a nice night picnic, take her to a park they don't visit often and confess there.
Why is this so hard?
She lets out a frustrated sigh, taking a look around her. The city pays her no mind, too wrapped up in its own business. Perhaps, it's for the best.
She's tempted to ask someone for advice. Except she's not sure how much Toya knows about romance, since the poor guy grew up under a rock and reads exclusively mystery novels, and she doesn't want to bother Akito again, who will already not let her live down the fact that he helped her with Kohane. Asking him for confession advice will only make him worse.
She can feel the moon's smile on her, bitter and forced.
She weaves her way through a crowd, temporarily shielded from the cold moonlight. Would Kohane prefer a grand gesture or something small and private? Should An take her somewhere they've never been, or stick to familiar locations?
Despite being partners with Kohane for so long, she suddenly feels like she doesn't know her at all.
The realization makes her flinch, every muscle in her body seizing with the force of it. She's always been close to Kohane, but somehow, someway, they're suddenly far apart. She distantly remembers, through a heavy fog, that in her physics class the teacher mentioned that the sun is roughly 150 million kilometers away from the moon. The distance seems appropriate for how far she feels from Kohane.
How to tell someone so important about such an intimate feeling?
She wants the moment to be perfect and meaningful, but she doesn't know how to create it, what to include, what to avoid.
"Hey, An-chan!" She hears a familiar voice, and she whips around to see the kindergarten teacher. "Where'd you lose your partner?"
Ah. What an unfortunate question.
"We practiced until it was really late, so Akito is walking her back instead," She replies. It's not the full truth, but their situation is too complex to explain to someone right now.
"And you're skipping work, hm?" She walks over to her, joining her on her walk.
"Dad let me go early." An looks between the crowd and her, unsure how much she should say.
"Does that have anything to do with your frowny face?" A finger pokes her cheek, then lifts it up.
"Yeah. Sorry, I'm trying to think over something. We can catch up some other day?" An offers, because she's not in the mood, but she also feels awful about not wanting to chat.
"Of course." An feels a hand take hers. "And whatever you're thinking about, I'm sure you'll figure it out." She receives a brilliant smile, so warm against the cold moonlight, and after that, the kindergarten teacher leaves.
An watches her weave through the crowd for a moment, hand still lingering with warmth, before she resumes her step.
It feels nice, to have someone encourage her blindly. An has always loved this street, this community with her whole heart; and they welcomed Kohane with open hearts, too.
Maybe she doesn't need to go any further than the street where they met, the street they stroll around, chatting about anything and everything, the street where An fell in love. Something tells her that if Kohane does love her, it started on this street, too. It's both their homes.
With her mind made up, she changes course back for the cafe. She's not sure how exactly she'll say what she needs to, but she's sure that she'll succeed in the moment.
The moon watches as she heads back, its curved smile calm and self-assured.
♡
The air is different.
Kohane isn't sure what changed between yesterday and today, but something between her and An feels dissimilar to the night before. The wall between them has shifted on An's side; Kohane wonders if it's for the better.
Whatever it is, their teammates can feel it too. Aoyagi keeps looking between them with curiosity, while Shinonome sent her a grin and a knowing nod. An's going to talk to her, and whatever comes of her words will be final.
Kohane can only accept her fate, waiting until practice finishes. They've still got a little left, and anxiety starts to slowly crawl up her body, from the tips of her toes, all the way through her nervous system up until it can make itself at home in her brain.
Akito turns off the music far too soon, and earns himself her questioning stare. Out of the corner of her eye, she sees Toya and An with similar expressions.
"We're endin' early. You two," He uses the mic he's holding to gesture between her and An, "Go figure out whatever the hell has been goin' on with you. I can almost touch the tension." He returns to packing up their equipment, while all she can do is stare in shock.
"Are you okay? Are you sure you're still Akito?" An asks, voicing Kohane's own concerns.
"I'll be better once you two start singin' like you did two days ago. Go before I change my mind." He sounds exasperated, but fondness lingers in his voice. Kohane is both thankful that the wall will be broken sooner and scared of the confrontation.
"Thanks?" An flails her arms uselessly, before she starts gathering her stuff, confusion still obvious on her face.
Kohane continues to stare at Shinonome for a moment longer, before she starts to pack her things too. Out of the corner of her eye, she sees Aoyagi say something to Akito, which makes him turn away and rub his neck.
A part of her wants to linger, to pack as slowly as she can to prolong the time when everything between her and An is the same. If everything shifts for the worse, those would be the last moments of normalcy they get.
The rest of her wants to rip the bandaid off as soon as possible, for better or for worse. She wants to take An's hand, a familiar weight in her own, and beg her to end the uncertainty between them, to break the wall that grew with one sentence.
In the end, neither of those things happen. She packs as normal, and so does An; Akito is quick to leave them behind, pulling Toya with him. Kohane stands with her backpack on her shoulders, the bag unfittingly light for how heavy she feels with the anticipation and anxiety. She looks over at An, and she feels a little better when her golden eyes reflect the nervousness buzzing underneath her skin.
"Wanna take a walk?" An offers, reaching her hand out. Kohane, after a moment, accepts the offer.
An's hand is the same as it was two nights ago; warm, comfortable and familiar. It's almost funny, how much can change in such a short timespan, and how despite that, some thing will stay the same.
An doesn't say anything, at first. Kohane recognizes the streets they pass through as the way back to Vivid Street, and she feels her nerves settle a little at the realization. It's a familiar environment, and if need be, she knows the way back home from there.
Kohane spares a glance around the city as they walk. The neon lights are just as they were when they walked underneath them the last time; a mesmerizing kaleidoscope. Above her, the moon is arched in curiosity, its pale face watching closely to see how the night unfolds.
They make it to the outskirts of Vivid Street in silence. Kohane's worried, and a single look at An's face makes it clear how nervous the other girl is. Kohane can't help but squeeze her hand lightly in reassurance, earning herself a smile, a small and shocked one, but a smile nonetheless.
Laughter and music reach her ears, and she's surprised to find the sounds different than usual; a look around confirms that these are not the sounds of a street performance, but a building deeper in the street is hosting an event. A birthday, a wedding, or something else entirely; she's not sure what, but the music is more relaxed and slower than what can be usually heard around here. She thinks she can see a couple people outside, dressed all elegant. Whatever conversation they're having is muted by the music and clinking sounds from inside.
Suddenly, she's spun around; she looks back at An, who is now holding both her hands in hers, a daring, nervous smile on her face.
"Wanna dance?" She asks with a steady voice.
Kohane nods, mouth suddenly dry. An accepts her silent agreement and begins to sway them with the music. Kohane starts to relax, even as An spins her around, then ducks under Kohane's arm to twirl herself, too. Slowly, she starts to add in her own steps, and An easily accommodates. She's no longer following An's lead, and instead, they're on equal footing.
Once the song changes, so does their dance; with the music much more energetic, they spin each other around, their feet tapping out the same rhythm that resounds around them. When Kohane stumbles, her foot landing wrong on the pavement, An catches her before she can fall.
They're so close, closer than they've ever been before. From here, Kohane can see little light spots in An's eyes, stars like the ones in her hair. An's hair falls around her face, a night sky curtain carrying the faint scent of mint and coffee. Her heart is going to jump out of her chest.
"Kohane," An starts, looking into her eyes with purpose, "The moon is beautiful tonight, isn't it?"
Kohane searches An's face for any sign of dishonesty. An's brows are a little furrowed in determination, but her expression is otherwise soft.
Out of the corner of her eye, she sees the nightly curtain sway with the breeze. She looks away from the stars and toward the golden, blazing sun hidden in An's eyes. Like a moth to a flame, she can't help but bring herself closer to the light.
Above them, the moon's crescent is a knowing, joyful smile.