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Alastor and Lucifer were, by no one's definition, friends. Them living under the same roof had made their already obvious hatred of one another just worse, and they couldn't even be around each other without an argument starting.
It's not like Charlie hadn't tried to fix things between them. She had really tried to convince them to learn to be civil with one another, and that they could talk their differences out. That hadn't worked.
For the most part, they stayed separate, in part because they didn't want to upset Charlie even more with their bickering. But it was mostly because they couldn't even stand the sight of each other, and both figured that their free time was much better used without being next to their least favorite person in their respective existences.
But unfortunately, even if they were always seated at opposite ends of the dinner table and stayed on specific schedules for when one or the other would be in the lobby, there were times when they would be together. It was bad enough when there were people around, people that served as a buffer since they had too much ego to seem like they cared all that much in front of others, but when they were alone together, it was a different story.
As time went on, Alastor did try to avoid such meetings. He figured that, if he didn't pay the king the attention that he thought that he so desperately wanted, maybe Lucifer would finally realize that there was no use in trying to get underneath Alastor's skin.
Lucifer didn't learn, and it's not like Alastor was all that successful in not initiating the fights anyways.
At least it had been a week since they last had a big blow up, even though they hadn't seen each other outside of dinner during the course of that week. However, their streak seemed to end when they ran into each other in the middle of the night in the kitchen, each getting a snack.
Both of them were exhausted, Lucifer barely having slept and Alastor not having slept at all. Alastor could hardly even stifle his yawns as he worked his way into the kitchen, not liking that he was up in the first place, and liking the fact that anyone was in there even less.
He shook his head, trying to get rid of the fog in his mind, hoping that maybe the impending doom that he was feeling would go away with it. Not that he would ever be so lucky. He opened the cabinet, trying to ignore Lucifer, praying- if any deity still bothered to hear him- that Lucifer would leave him alone just this once.
But Lucifer soon bumped into him, nearly knocking the deer demon over. He tried to act cool and calm and composed because somehow that was the better option for the night. He didn't react beyond the radio glitching sound that he had involuntarily made.
"Fucking watch it Bambi! Mind your own space!" And that was Lucifer, deciding to stir the pot, the pot that Alastor knew was about to boil over at any given moment.
"Look, it is the middle of the night! I am... it is too late to be arguing right now," he chose his words carefully. He was not desperate enough to admit to something as silly as being tired. What a thought.
Lucifer rolled his eyes, setting the snack bar that he had picked up down on the counter behind him. "What, is the poor little Radio Demon too tired? Or does he finally realize that arguing with me is a waste of his time, because he sucks and I could kill him if I wanted to? Huh? Is he scared?"
Alastor was just getting irritated. He tried to play it off, tried to not let it bother him, because the surge in emotions would only make things worse and he knew that. He knew that. But he couldn't not respond to Lucifer after such an insult. "No, well, maybe yes. Arguing with you is a waste of my time, because it's like trying to argue with a mosquito!" He spun around and gave a condescending pat to Lucifer's head. Which didn't go over well.
The king pulled away, his horns beginning to pop out the top of his head. He wasn't having any of this. He was awfully upset for an argument that he wanted so bad that he started.
"You're such an insolent bitch, you know that? Do you have any new jokes, any new commentary, any new anything beyond just 'oh you're small!' and 'oh you're so annoying!' don't think I haven't heard those before? Why are you even like this?"
However, he was met only with silence from Alastor. He furrowed his eyebrows, having to stop himself before delivering a swift kick to the demon's shin. He looked awfully expressionless, Lucifer thought. Ears down, slightly twitching around towards the back of his head, eyes wide and empty. "Trying to play the quiet game? Oh yeah, well I can do that too!"
Alastor blinked hard. Fuck. Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck. Oh well, he could recover this, even if he had only heard the last bit of what Lucifer had said. It didn't seem like it had lasted that long. "Why must you start arguments if you are only going to get annoyed by them? Save yourself the breath."
"There we go. Always giving in at the last second!" Giving in about what, Alastor couldn't help but wonder. He so wished that he could go back and replay what Lucifer had said. He had to know how to defend himself somehow. "I don't want to start arguments! You're such an annoying freak that I have to!"
"No one has to do anything! You're clearly being driven by your own ego, which has seemingly gotten too big for that tiny little body of yours."
"See what I mean! Same jokes every single time. So unoriginal!" Okay. Short jokes, whatever high horse he's on is about short jokes. Ha. The irony. It was rather amazing to Alastor, but also terrifying even if he didn't want to think about that part of it, how much he could miss in just a few seconds.
Either way, he needed to get back up to his room. It was probably only going to get worse until he actually got some sleep. Lucifer wouldn't be helping.
"Unoriginal? Me? Like you have anything to say about that! Aren't you literally the cause of original sin?" His brain was too fried to be making many actual comebacks, but it did seem to actually strike a nerve with Lucifer. His smile grew. At least he knew where to hit him. "Besides, wasn't sin your only original idea? I've done more in 100 years than you have in your millennia!"
"I am quite literally Lucifer. Everything that you got to do in your life is because I made it possible, I gave you the free will that you used for your stupid sense of fun, which was killing people! So none of it was even your idea! It was mine. If you wanna be unoriginal down here, you have to start acting like the bitches up there!"
Alastor lowered Lucifer's finger, which was raised, pointing towards the sky. "Now now Lucifer, don't get..." his voice trailed off as he spoke.
Lucifer waited for a moment, before interjecting. "Are you even gonna finish that? Whatever. I wish I could undo the whole free will thing just so that I don't have to hear your voice! Maybe in the next Extermination, they'll do all of Hell a favor!" He didn't truly wish to undo free will. And, even if he wouldn't admit it... he wouldn't want to see Alastor dead, either. "Are you even listening to me?"
"I sure am! Which is rather unfortunate. No one in Heaven or Hell seems to find you all that interesting!" He almost made a comment about even his wife not being able to stand him, but he stopped before he continued. He didn't hear the first part of that. He didn't know what he was answering to.
"Everyone finds me interesting. Just because you are too stupid, or maybe too egotistical, or whatever you are- whatever the fuck is wrong with you Alastor- to care about who I am, doesn't mean that the rest of Hell doesn't respect me!" He had lost the battle to control his anger, all of his demon features beginning to show. Alastor didn't seem to react. And that was bothering him.
He stared at him, not just with his usual empty smile, but with empty eyes too. His ears were back again, twitching a bit. His hand was also twitching in front of him, and his radio was crackling and popping all over the place. "Are you even listening to me? You better respect me, Alastor. I am your King!"
Alastor didn't respond. He didn't even budge, or react to Lucifer's intensifying anger in any way. He seemed to say something, but Lucifer couldn't make it out. It was barely above a whisper.
"I said respect me, because I am your fucking King, and you need to listen to me!" Lucifer swatted at Alastor, just across the chest, enough to make him stumble back, but still not respond. "Don't ignore me you..." he shook Alastor by the shoulder as he said that. Still nothing.
Come to think of it, he had never heard Alastor's radio static make such a sound anymore. It was a bit odd and maybe even disconcerting.
"Listen to me- are you fucking listening? Again, you can't just stay silent forever, you're gonna have to talk at some point!" Nothing still. Lucifer stopped shaking him, slapping his hand at his side. "What the fuck are you even looking at?" He turned around, trying to figure it out, but there was nothing that he could see there. "Well, I guess that I'll just have to stand here and wait for you to stop being such a big baby."
He crossed his arms. He tried to look as intimidating as possible, even if he was feeling a bit nervous about the whole thing. Why the fuck was he nervous when this was about Alastor.
After a few seconds, Alastor blinked again, stumbling backwards on shaky legs. He crashed into the cabinet behind him, putting his arms out to brace himself before he fell all the way down and made a bigger spectacle out of himself than he already had. "What was that, Your Highness? You got too boring for me to pay attention to you."
Lucifer could sense the feigned decorum and arrogance from a mile away, but he could also sense the genuine confusion radiating off of Alastor, too. The demon was clearly trying to hold it all together and seem like he had any clue what was going on. "What the fuck was that all about, Alastor?"
The king sounded more serious than Alastor would have liked, all things considered. He didn't quite know how he was going to pull this off, considering that he was still trying to get all of his balance back and figure out everything that had happened. "What do you mean?"
"You know what I mean. That spacey thing you just did, what was it?"
"Spacey thing? Whatever could you mean, sire?" He was forcing his smile the most that he had ever forced it, trying his best to keep his ears up, trying to not seem like he was absolutely exhausted. Because he was.
"You looked like you were seeing a ghost! I was trying to get your attention, and don't say-"
"I was just ignoring you."
"Don't say that you were just ignoring me," he finished his sentence as Alastor interrupted him. Why was he so damn stubborn, and why did he care enough to try to figure out what had happened. "I don't know, I'm an angel, I don't know... common human turned sinner biology but that looked like a stroke or a seizure or something."
Alastor's ears immediately perked up, and his radio glitched again, loud, piercing through Lucifer's ears practically. Seemed like Lucifer had said something that had gotten to Alastor. He tried to calm himself, but it was of no use. "No, I do not know what you are talking about."
Lucifer reached out a hand, Alastor quickly pulling his away. He was not a fan of being touched by anyone. Especially by Lucifer. Especially in such a way that he considered to be demeaning, even if Lucifer was just genuinely trying to help him- which, to Alastor, was demeaning. "Alastor, if you genuinely don't know, you could have literally just had a seizure. You should get that checked out."
"Well I'm fine! No seizures, no need to check me out!" Alastor stepped away from the king but the fallen angel blocked his path almost immediately.
"Have you ever been checked for them? That's what it looked like and... I mean, I wouldn't want that getting in the way of you defending my daughter's hotel!" Lucifer didn't know if he was lying more to Alastor or himself about why he was trying to do anything for him.
But Alastor was too tired for this. He was too something for this, even if he couldn't exactly word it. Maybe because his brain was still trying to figure out what the hell was going on or how the hell to stay standing, or maybe because he just felt another seizure coning on quickly. "Fine! You win! I sometimes have small seizures, but I'm fine, I swear."
"Oh. Is that why I catch you staring off sometimes?" Lucifer was genuinely asking, before taking back his words, putting his hands behind his back with an uncomfortable laugh. "Sorry, that was a bit out of pocket. I mean, you know what I mean! This is like a thing?"
Alastor hated the questioning. Alastor hated the condition. It made him feel weak and unworthy, and Lucifer having admitted to having noticed it before made everything infinitely worse. He didn't respond at first, just made an angry glare, trying to think of the proper words. "Potentially. But I am fine."
"You do know that you don't have to be fine, right? Like. Obviously you're fine," if Lucifer did know one thing, it was how to get to Alastor. They were far more similar than either of them would like to admit. And playing to his ego was the way to go. "But I think denying this problem only makes you look silly!"
"It is not a problem!" Alastor didn't have problems. He was fine. Not that he had much other choice.
He had hid it for so long, and he didn't plan on stopping now. There was no need to seek help. He suddenly felt his head getting a little fuzzy again, but tried to push through it all. Even if it felt like time was slowing down.
"-stor? Alastor, you're doing it again!" Alastor blinked heavily, trying to clear the confusion from his mind. Seriously. He wasn't entirely sure why he cared, but this whole thing was his worst nightmare, and there was absolutely nothing that he could do to stop it. Without accepting help, of course.
"I'm fine, sorry," Lucifer didn't seem to buy the demon's words. He felt something weird in his chest, something that he absolutely would never forgive himself for doing, but he had to do it anyways. He walked up to Alastor, wrapping his arms around the demon, and pulled him into a hug.
Alastor just stood there, his arms awkwardly hovering around Lucifer, definitely not willing to hug him back. He didn't know what to make of this. "Lucifer, what the fuck are you doing?"
"Hugging you, you idiot," Lucifer responded. "It's not weak to be going through this. I know that you are incapable of listening to me, which is awfully weak, in my opinion, but it's okay to not be okay."
The deer demon almost retorted with his classic I'm fine, everything is fine, because I am incapable of not being fine- but he didn't. Lucifer's attempt at getting under his skin was working, damnit, and all he could do was wrap his arms around the king in return.
He wasn't ready to actually admit to needing help. No, not yet. That would take a while. But it was awfully nice to be seen, to be told that he wasn't weak. Maybe one of these days, he would be able to talk to Lucifer about it more. Not today, but maybe, just maybe, someday.