Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

“Samson, calm down, honey.” Mommy told him as he bounces around the kitchen.

But Sam couldn't help it. It was a very exciting day.

Sam continues to lap around the table a couple more times, giggling. He doesn't notice that his mommy had moved from the cabinet to the box on the floor as she put dishes in their new spots and he runs into her legs.

“Oof! Sorry, mommy.” He said as he steps back a little.

“Slow down, Sammy!” She says slowly as she picks up a stack of bowls out of the box.

Sam bounces from foot to foot. “I can’t help it. I’m so excited. When is he going to get here?”

“Honey, I told you five minutes ago. He’ll be here in a few minutes. Why don’t you finish getting ready while you wait.”

“Okay!” Sam yells as he flies out of the room to his bedroom.

Sam had just moved to this new house in Pelican Town from Zuzu City a week ago. He was happy to have a new place to explore but it was very different from Zuzu. 

It was very quiet. He was used to people yelling and cars honking in the streets but the quiet meant that he could hear all the different animal sounds. 

It was very dark. He was used to there always being light, either from the sun or street lights or passing cars, but the darkness meant that he could always see the stars at night. 

It felt like there was nobody here. He was used to there always being people around, either in his apartment building or in stores or on the street, but that just meant that he would be able to meet everyone here in town.

He had already started to meet the other kids in the town. From what his daddy had told him, there were four kids his age that lived here. 

Haley was the first kid his age he met. She lived in the house next door with her older sister and parents. She had been outside when the moving truck had pulled up to Sam’s new house playing with a jump rope. It had rained that morning and Sam noticed she was careful to stay away from the puddles. Sam had talked to her and was very excited to make her his new friend but he wasn’t sure about her being a best friend. She said that she didn’t like jumping in puddles because it would make her dress dirty and Sam loved to jump in puddles.

He met Penny a couple days later. She was sitting under a tree reading a book not too far from his house. As he walked toward her, she had lifted her head, eyes going wide when she noticed him, before ducking down and hiding her face behind her book. “Hi! I’m Sam!” he introduced himself to her but she stayed slouched behind her book. “What are you reading?” Sam had asked. In a very quiet voice she said “Charlotte’s Web”. Sam had talked to her a little more and was very excited to make her his new friend but he wasn’t sure about her being a best friend. She had told him she didn't like to play with trucks, preferring to read, and Sam loved to play with his trucks.

The day after he met Penny, he met Abigail. His mommy had taken him to the store to get groceries and he had noticed her following them, looking at them from between the shelves. Sam decided to play her game. Crouching as low to the floor as he could, he crept around the corner behind Abigail and yelled “BOO!”. She let out a surprised shriek before turning around giggling. Sam had talked to her and was very excited to make her a friend but he wasn’t sure about her being a best friend. She said that she didn't like spiders because they were very scary and Sam loved spiders and bugs and frogs.

But today, his mommy had told him that he would have a playdate with a new friend and all he could think about was meeting him. She had told him his name was Sebastian and he was a few months older than him but they would still be in the same class at school. Sam really hoped that Sebastian would like jumping in puddles; and catching bugs and frogs and spiders; and playing with trucks.

Sam runs to his bedroom in the back of the house. He’s so excited about his new room because it’s a lot bigger than his room in Zuzu. It makes him feel like a big boy too because it’s far away from mommy and daddy’s big room at the front of the house.

Mommy told him he can decorate his room however he wanted. They painted the walls in a light orange and they started putting some of his drawings up on it. He had a shelf that he put some of his favourite toys — a plastic frog, his Spiderman, and a couple of his stuffies — as well as photos of him with his nana and papa, and friends from back in Zuzu.

Sam was mostly ready for the day. He already changed into his swimwear. He put on his favourite blue trunks and a red top that had a yellow puppy on it. His mommy had already put his arm floaties and goggles in the wagon with his beach towel that had dinosaurs on it.

Walking over to his toy box, he begins to dig. He takes out a couple of toy dinosaurs and a few trucks, placing them on the floor beside the box. He digs nearly to the bottom before he finds his orange sand bucket and a couple small plastic shovels.

Just as he starts putting the toys in the bucket, the doorbell rings.

“He’s here!” Sam yells and runs to the door. He pushes past his mom, who was walking to answer, and throws open the front door with a wide grin. He blinks as he looks at a pair of legs then looks up at a woman with red hair.

“Hi! My name is Sam!” He says, bouncing on the balls of his feet.

“Hi Sam!”, the woman smiles. “My name is Robin. And this is my son, Sebastian.”

Sam looks down again as the woman gestures behind her with her hand. Peeking around her legs is a little boy with the same red hair the woman has. His arms are wrapped around her leg as he stares at Sam.

“Hi! My name is Samson but everyone calls me Sam!”, he repeats to the boy. “What’s your name?” Sam, of course, already knows the boy’s name but wanted to be polite.

“Sebastian”, the boy mumbles quietly.

“Hi Robin”, Mommy says, resting a hand on the top of Sam’s head. He turns his head up to look at her as she smiles down at him. She looks back up as she drops a hand on Sam’s shoulder, moving them both away from the door. “Why don’t you come in? I just need to grab the cooler and a couple more towels and we should be all set.”

Robin moves into the living room and Sebastian walks behind her, one arm still around her leg. Sam watches him, trying to get a look at the boy. He eyes Sebastian's shirt, red t-shirt with a green frog that has a white belly.

“I like your shirt! Do you like frogs?” Sebastian only responds with a nod.

“I have a toy frog in my room! Do you want to come see?”

Sebastian looks up at his mom, who nods down at him. “It’s okay, Sebby. You can go with him.”

As soon as Sebastian lets go of his mother’s leg, Sam grabs hold of his hand and leads him down the hall. He lets go as soon as they enter the room and walks to his shelf, turning around to show Sebastian the green frog.

Sam watches as Sebastian’s eyes light up, a large grin spreading across his face. “That looks like a green frog!” Sebastian exclaims excitedly. “See the spots on him and his white belly and his yellow throat! They’re one of my favourites!”

Reaching out, Sam offers the frog to Sebastian. “Here, you can play with this when we go to the beach.” Sebastian beams at him as he takes the frog.

“Sam, get your toys! We’re about to leave!” He hears his mommy call him.

Sam runs over and gathers up the toys he took out of the box, dumping them into his bucket. Sebastian had followed him and looks into the toy box. 

“Can we take this too?” He asks Sam, pulling out a purple plastic spider almost the size of his hand. “Maybe it can be the monster that attacks the sand castle!”

Sam holds out the bucket to let Sebastian drop the spider in, then, grabbing his hand, pulls him towards the door.

It was a nice day to go to the beach. It was hot and there were a few big, fluffy clouds being slowly pushed across the sky by a light breeze. 

Sam hadn’t been to the beach yet. As they cleared the path to it, the first thing he noticed was how big the it was. There was a small building at the far side in front of them, sitting on a pier that hovered over the water. He looked to the left and there was a small cabin. Just beyond that, across a wooden bridge, was another beach that had small, shallow pools on it. 

He was a little sad when he noticed that, even though it was a nice day, there was no one else on the beach except for a man on the pier fishing (Willy, he heard Robin tell Mommy).

Sam and Sebastian were walking in front of their mothers, hand in hand. Sam felt a tug as Sebastian led them to the right, picking a spot near a weird statue sitting at the tree line at the back of the beach. They helped lay out a big blanket for them all to sit on while their moms set up a giant umbrella, then started to take out the various things in the wagon.

“Okay boys,” Mommy said. “What do you want to do first?”

“Do you want to swim first?” Sam asked Sebastian, who nodded.

Sam was happy to learn that Sebastian wasn't a good swimmer, just like him, and they both had to wear arm floaties. Sebastian's had frogs all over while Sam's had sharks. They practiced swimming (with the help of their mothers), splashing as they went.

After that, Sam ran to get his goggles and they both took turns looking for fish. They spotted a lot of shells on the ocean floor and a few jellyfish. They were both surprised when Robin told them that jellyfish are not actually fish.

“But why do they have fish in their name if they're not fish?” Sebastian mumbled to Sam, who nodded in agreement.

After a while in the water, their moms decided it was time for a quick snack. Sam asked Sebastian as many questions as he could think of as they sat on the blanket eating their maple bars, and answered just as many from Sebastian. He learned that Sebastian’s favourite colour was purple and green; his favourite animal, or amphibian as Sebastian had told him, was frogs; he loved when it rained; he loved to colour; his favourite superhero was Spiderman (“me too!” Sam had exclaimed); and he had one little sister named Maru, who was almost four years old.

“Thank you, Mama, for the snack.” Sebastian said to his mother, bringing her the empty container that had held their maple bars.

Their play was paused a little longer as they were coated with more sunscreen before Sebastian turned to Sam with a grin on his face. “Do you want to build a sand castle?”

Sam nodded excitedly and grabs the sand bucket from the wagon. He runs to the ocean, fills the bucket up with water, and runs back. Sebastian had started digging in the sand with one of Sam’s trucks, driving paths into the it to make a hole. “I love this truck!” Sebastian exclaims. “It makes digging really easy!”.

Sam pours the water from his bucket on the sand and they begin to build their castle. They build a large square to form the main part of the castle, taking turns to get water with the bucket to drench the sand. Once that was built, they pack the bucket with the wet sand, tipping it over to form the four corners of the castle. A door is carved into one of the walls and windows are scattered along the others.

Once finished, the boys stand back to admire their work. Sam thinks something was missing.

“We should decorate it!” Sam declares. He looks around and walks away a little to grab a shell laying in the sand. “These would work!”

They spend the next few minutes collecting shells and some colourful sea glass that Sebastian had found before working to decorate the castle. They stick the shells and sea glass along the walls, and use one wall to write out their names – Sebastian writing 'Seb' because he didn't have room to write his full name, which made him a little sad because he had been practicing really hard on his spelling.

Once satisfied, they again stood back to admire their work. Robin had come over as well, camera in hand, to take photos of the castle as well as them standing in front of it.

“I think this is the best castle I've built in my entire life!” Sebastian says happily.

“Me too!” Sam grins, starting to run and jump around it.

He runs a little too close to the hole they had dug to build the corners of the castle and trips on the soft sand around the edges. He falls with a small splash onto the wet sand inside, letting out a small “oof”.

“Are you okay?” Sebastian asks as he runs over.

“Yeah, I'm okay. I just fell into the puddle.” He pulls himself onto is feet, looking down at the mud now covering his legs, arms, and clothes.

Sebastian jumps up and down. “I love puddles!”

“Really?” Sam asks excitedly. “I love them, too! Wait! Let's dig a bigger hole and make a bigger puddle so we can both jump into it!”

Picking up the small, plastic shovels, they both dig a very large hole that would fit both of them. Sebastian runs back to his mother at the blanket to take the empty container that their maple bars had been in and follows Sam to the water. Laughing, they quickly fill up their buckets and run back to the hole, dumping the water. It takes them a couple times to fill up the hole they had dug to their satisfaction but once it was filled, they both jump in, splashing each other thoroughly with the wet, sandy, mud.

They jumped and kicked and splashed the water until all the water seemed to have splashed out, leaving just a wet pit.

“Okay, you two,” Sam’s mom calls out. “Go rinse the mud off in the ocean. It’s time to leave!”

The boys ran to the water, splashing each other to get the mud off. By the time they ran back, Sam’s mom had packed up the toys into the wagon as Sebastian’s mom tugged on the backpack she had brought. They followed their mothers as they walked toward the path that would lead them back to town, hand in hand.

Sam was unusually quiet as they walked. Now that he had met all the children his age in town, he had a big decision to make. He had to decide who would be his best friend. Haley, Penny, and Abigail all seemed very nice but each of them didn’t like something that Sam loved: puddles, trucks, and spiders.

He had liked Haley and thought she could be a good friend but she hadn’t liked jumping in puddles. He and Sebastian had had a lot of fun jumping in the puddle at the beach, getting each other covered in sandy mud.

He had liked Penny and thought she could be a good friend but she didn’t like trucks. Sebastian had said that he loved Sam’s truck because it was good for digging holes.

He had liked Abigail and thought she could be a good friend but she didn’t like spiders. Sam remembered how Sebastian had excitedly pulled out the purple spider from his toy box, wanting to use it for a monster attacking the castle.

By the time they had walked from the beach to the turn in the road that led to Sam’s house, he had made up his mind. Walking a little faster – Sebastian being pulled along with him – he catches up to the wagon and grabs something out of his bucket.

“Here, Sebastian,” Sam holds out the toy frog. “You can keep this. I know you really liked it.”

Sebastian's eyes grew as wide as the grin on his face. “Really? Thank you!”

As their moms turn to each other to say goodbye, Sam pulls Sebastian into a hug.

“You're my new best friend, Sebastian! We're going to have so much fun! I love you!”

Chapter Text

Loud giggles mix with singing as Sam bounces around his room to the music of Chumbawamba. He collapses on his bed at the lyrics “I get knocked down”, jumping up when instructed to “get back up again” before continuing to bounce around the room. The Superman toy in his hand flies through the air as he hops over piles of toys and clothes on his floor.

“Samson!” 

Freezing in place after jumping over his big frog plushie, Sam looks at his mom who has appeared in his doorway. She stares at him while leaning against the doorframe, her arms crossed, one eyebrow raised, and a frown tugging at her mouth.

Exasperated, Jodi sighs, “You’re supposed to be cleaning your room.” Her eyes dart around at the toys and clothes that cover the floor before landing back on Sam.

Sam’s eyes sweep over his floor before looking down at the toy in his hand. He raises it up to show his mother. “I am cleaning, mama!”

Jodi uncrosses her arms, expression softening. “Try to have it clean before lunch, please.” And with that, she turns and leaves back down the hallway.

Sam watches her leave before letting out a sigh. He looks back down at Superman clutched in his fist before walking a few steps, bending down and grabbing a couple more toys off his floor, then throwing them in his open toy box.

By now the song on the radio had switched to a song from one of his favourite movies, Men in Black. He bounces a few steps, singing along every so many words – the lyrics are a little too fast and he hasn't quite figured them out – stopping only to grab a few clothes off his floor before dancing towards his closet to put them in his hamper.

A blinding flash lights up the room followed by a loud boom. Sam runs to his window to look outside but there are no more flashes. He absolutely loves it when it thunderstorms. It has been storming all day, so he's been stuck inside all day. And because he was stuck inside, his mom decided it was the perfect time for him to clean his messy room. He would much rather be outside jumping and playing in puddles than cleaning his room but his mama always tells him it's too dangerous to be outside when there's lightning.

As he watches out his window, looking for frogs so he can tell his best friend Sebastian, he notices a figure walking out from where the old bus stop to Zuzu City is. Nobody ever comes from that path, since it only leads to the old bus stop and the old, rundown farm property just outside of town.

It's raining too hard for him to tell who it is, so he squints a little and waits, hoping to figure it out. From what he could tell, they definitely weren't an adult, just barely tall enough to see over the fence at the end of the vacant property behind his house. Sam also notices that they were not using an umbrella, despite how hard it was raining. 

The figure veers in his direction once they get to the opening in the fence, quickly walking down the path that had been worn in the grass. As the person gets closer, he can just make out a blue hoodie with what looks like a green blob on it, hood pulled up, head down against the sheets of rain pummeling them.

Huh. Sebastian has a hoodie like that, the green blob being a frog that's riding a red skateboard.

The more he watches the figure, wearing the same hoodie and about the same height as Sebastian, the more convinced he is that it is him. Normally Sebastian would call him to ask to visit before walking down the long path from his home on the mountain but he hasn't heard from him. And Sam's pretty sure Robin, Seb's mom, had the same rule as his mother about not going outside when it was thunderstorming.

Another flash lights up the sky as the person walks past the opening in Sam’s backyard fence and continues walking behind his neighbours home. He loses track of the person, the angle of his room blocking them from view.

He runs out of his room and down the hall. He slows when he gets to the livingroom and, making sure his mother is paying attention to the TV show she was watching, walks down the hall towards his parent's room at the side of house. He turns his head to make sure his mother isn’t watching him, ready with the excuse that he was going to the washroom if she asks, then quietly turns into his parent’s bedroom.

He walks to the window in front of the bed and peers outside. The person is nowhere to be found. Sam frowns. Where did they go?

He walks back to the bedroom door, still convinced that it was Sebastian coming to visit him, and waits. He counts to sixty at least five times — he had lost count towards the end, so it was probably five times — waiting for the doorbell to ring or a knock at the door, but neither came.

Curiosity got the best of him. Was it Sebastian? If it was, where was he? Did he get distracted coming to visit him because he found a frog?

OOOH. Maybe he found a frog! Well, Sam wanted to see the frog too!

He ran back to his room and beelined to his closet. He dug through the pile of clothes sitting on the floor until he found his raincoat and rainboots, pulling them on as quickly as he could. He then paused, looking around his room. “There is it!”, he exclaimed when he found his umbrella half hiding under his dresser. 

Lightning flashed again and he froze, looking down at the metal on his umbrella in his hands. His mother had told him he can't use anything with metal in this kind of weather.

Right. Maybe I shouldn’t bring my umbrella, he thinks, dropping it back underneath his dresser.

Okay. Now to get past his mother.

He debated about sneaking out the back door but he didn’t want his mama to be worried if she came to check on him again and he was nowhere to be seen. Taking a deep breath, he walks quickly through the livingroom, opening the front door while yelling, “I’m going to play with Sebby!”. He thought he heard his mother calling out to him but he closed the door quickly behind him.

A quick glace to the right told him Seb wasn't walking down the path towards Cindersap Forest. He shivers in the early autumn air as the cold rain hits his face. Turning left on the path outside his house, he runs past his neighbour Haley’s home. He expected to see Sebastian at the small grassy part across the path talking to a frog but when he got to the end of Haley’s house, Seb was nowhere to be seen.

Confused, he took the cobble path up and around the graveyard, hopping in as many puddles as he could and kicking at newly fallen orange and red leaves.

He stopped to look around when he got to the Mayor's house but Seb was still nowhere to be found. He continued down the path towards the bridge to the beach, looking to the left towards the library but still nothing. So the only spot left to check was the beach.

A flash of lightning and a crack of thunder boomed as he crossed over the old, stone bridge. Pulling the hood of his raincoat tighter against his head, he squinted in the rain, just making out a person walking along the docks furthest to the right of Willy’s Fish Shop.

Sam walks along the wet sand, keeping an eye on the person as they reach the end of the pier and sit down, legs dangling over the edge. Another blinding flash lights up the pier as he reaches it, the loud boom that follows making the old wood tremble slightly under his feet.

“Hey, Sebby,” Sam says as he gets to the end.

Sebastian sniffles, keeping his eyes on the ocean. "Hi, Sammy," he responds quietly.

"Why are you at the beach? It's pouring! And where's your raincoat?"

A shrug is Seb's only response.

Just then a wave hits the posts of the pier, spraying salty water over both of them. It's only then that Sam realizes how strong the wind is, making the waves look angry as they're pushed into the wood.

Reaching down, he grabs Sebastian's arm in a tight grip. "Come sit a little back, Sebby. We're going to get soaked by the water!"

Despite already being completely soaked, Sebastian let's himself be pulled up and moved back halfway down the pier. When Sam stops walking, they both plop down on the wet wood, Sebastian turning away from Willy's shop and facing towards the giant rock in the ocean.

Sam was convinced once that he saw a mermaid on the other side of the rock but Sebastian insisted that there was no such thing and it was probably a seal. Apparently sailors in the old days didn't recognise seals and thought they were mermaids. Sam didn't believe him though. He had seen seals before and they looked nothing like mermaids, so how could a sailor not recognise a seal? Plus, there was a mermaid show at the night market in the winter — not that his mother had let him see it — so of course mermaids were real.

They sat in silence for a while, Sam taking the time to stare at the rock hoping to catch another mermaid (and sadly seeing none), when he remembered—

"Oh! Wasn't today the day you were going to visit your dad? Is he meeting you here?"

Sebastian lets out a small laugh at that. It didn't sound like a happy laugh to Sam. "No. He's not coming."

Sam couldn't help the frown tugging at his lips. "Oh? How come?"

"He said something important came up, said he'd have to take a rain check."

"Rain check?" Sam thought that was a funny thing to say, considering how hard it was raining. He looks up towards the sky. "But it's already raining!" He says, turning a grin towards Seb.

His grin widens as Sebastian let out a giggle. "No! It means not doing something now and saying you'll do it later." The smile drops from Seb's face. "So, I can't spend the next couple weeks at dad's but he's promised we'll do something soon."

"Did he say when?" Sam asked.

"No. It doesn't matter anyway," Seb said, his voice sounding angry. "He's just going to call at the last minute and give some reason that he can't come get me. Again. I just wish he lived closer and was actually around."

Sam bit his lip as he quietly watched him. He didn't like when Sebastian looked sad or angry.

“That's kinda like my daddy. He's not here now either because he's at work in the army and far away." Sam couldn't help it as he started to get sad himself, heart hurting in the way it did sometimes when he remembered where his dad was. "And I don't know when he will be back either."

“No, Sam. It's not the same." Sebastian lets out a deep sigh, lips turned downward, eyebrows drawn inward.

Sam knew it wasn't exactly the same thing, but he knew what it was like to have your father leave for a long period of time, not knowing when the next time you would see him would be. Sam's father, Kent, was in the Ferngill Republic Army and had been deployed to the frontlines six months ago as things with the Gotoro Empire had gotten bad again.

"You're dad is away in the army to protect the Republic," Seb continued. "Mine lives a couple hours away and just works in an office. Your dad wants to be here and always plays with you when he's home. Mine never wants to see me or play with me.”

“But you said that your dad got busy, that's why he couldn't get you this weekend. I'm sure he wants to see you but couldn't.”

“I haven't seen my dad since Winter Star. That was months ago! And it was only for two days. And before that was a weekend last summer. Maybe– maybe if it only happened a couple times… but it's been every time since," Seb looks down at his hands in his lap, before dropping his voice just above a whisper, "I don't think my dad likes me very much.”

“Come on, Sebby. How could he not like you? I bet he really wants to see you but he's really busy.”

"But it's every time, Sammy! If it was a couple times, it would be okay. He always makes fun plans and I get excited, only for him to be busy. This time we were supposed to go to the fair and play games and win fun prizes. Two months ago we were going to go to the zoo but Ben had a baseball thing. The time before that we were going to go to the museum because they had a dinosaur thing with all these old bones but Sarah wanted to have a sleepover that weekend. He always does what his other kids want but not me."

Sebastian turns away from Sam then, staring back out at the water with a sad expression and angrily brushing his cheeks. Sam hadn't realized he was crying, the rain still falling in their faces hiding his tears.

Sam turns his head and watches the waves. He had never met Ben and Sarah, Sebastian's half-siblings, but had heard a lot about them. Ben was really into sports and joined a lot of different teams. Seb's dad apparently went to every game he had. Sarah was put into ballet when she was really young and their dad never missed a recital. She also had a lot of friends, apparently, and had a lot of sleepovers that Sebastian was never invited to.

This wasn't the first time he saw Seb this sad because of his dad. Although he was a very good hider and usually would act like everything was ok, Sam was sure Sebastian was always sad after his dad couldn't come get him. He would sometimes get mad when Sam asked about it.

He had noticed, the last time Seb's dad had told him he couldn't visit because they had to go away for Ben's baseball game, that the photo that Seb kept on his dresser of him and his dad wasn't there any more. Sam didn't want Sebastian to get mad or sad, so he hadn't asked about it. But it hasn't been put back on the dresser since and wasn't anywhere else in the bedroom that Sam noticed.

The reminder made Sam's heart hurt again. Sebastian's words — I don't think my dad likes me very much — playing in his head.

He couldn't imagine not liking Sebastian. He was his best friend! He loved frogs, and playing video games. He was a very good story teller and they would spend hours coming up with stories, usually about sorcerers and knights and princesses and princes. He was really smart when it came to computers and, Sam wasn't entirely sure what it was he did with them, but Sebastian usually making fun things on them.

But not just all that, Seb was kind and nice. He was gentle, taking the time to learn how to nurse injured frogs back to health. He always listened when Sam would talk about something he was interested in, like trying something on the guitar his dad got him before he left or about a trick he wanted to learn on the skateboard if his mom ever let him have one.

So, Sam told him just that, listing out all the reasons why he liked Sebastian and why he was a fun and caring person.

When he was done, Sebastian didn't respond for a while. He just looked at Sam with wide, tearful eyes.

When he did speak, it was in a soft, quiet voice. "Really, Sammy?"

"Of course!" Sam was determined to make his friend feel better, not wanting him to be sad and think bad things about himself. "And— and, you know what? If your dad doesn't want to hang out and play with you then I will! I will always want to play with you!"

Seb wipes his cheeks, despite the rain continuing to mix with his tears, before turning a small smile towards Sam. "Thanks, Sammy."

Sam leans over and pulls Sebastian into a hug. They break apart a few seconds later with a jump, lightning racing across the sky and boom of thunder shanking the pier. Sam had forgotten that they were sitting at the beach in a storm.

Laughing, he gets up on his feet. "Come on, Sebby." He starts, reaching a hand down to help Seb up. "It's probably close to lunchtime. Let's go back to my house."

Hands clasped, Sam leads them both back down the pier. Halfway up the beach, Sam's foot kicks something that had been partially buried in the sand. He walks the few feet it had flown and bent down to exam the shell. It was half of a clam shell, light blue and white, and about the size of his hand.

Picking it up, he holds out his hand, palm up, towards Sebastian. "Here, Sebby. This is for you."

"For me? Thanks!" Sebastian's lips turn up into a grin as he takes it from Sam.

Another flash and boom remind the boys where they are and they make their way back to Sam's home as quickly as they can.

"Mama?" Sam calls out as they walk into the entryway.

"Samson Kent McClain! Where on Earth did you—" Jodi rounds the corner into the livingroom, stopping short as she spots Sebastian, who sneezes as her eyes land on him.

Her voice softening, she says, "Oh, Sebastian. You're soaked through! You're both soaked through! Both of you go change into dry clothes right now."

"Ok, mama." Sam says, taking Seb's hand again and leading him into the bedroom.

Once changed, they both make their way back to the livingroom. Jodi gets off the couch, "have a seat Sebastian. I got your favourite movie ready."

"Okay, Mrs. Jodi," Sebastian sneezes again before taking a seat on the couch.

"Oh, you poor thing. You're going to catch a cold. I'll warm up some pumpkin soup for lunch. Sam, can you help me?"

Sam follows his mother into the kitchen and stands near the entrance, watching as she walks to the freezer. She paws through it until she finds a container of leftover pumpkin soup she had made a week ago.

Sam, still not allowed to use the stove, walks over and opens a lower cabinet, taking out a pot and sets in on top of the stove for his mother.

"Now, Sam", jodi says as she plops the frozen soup into the pot, turning the stove on. "You have to know how worried I was about you. What happened? Where did you go?"

Sam explains everything: watching a figure walking in the rain; realizing it was Sebastian; thinking he was coming to visit before realizing that he wasn't; going out to look for him then finding him on the beach; what Seb had said about his father.

Jodi, for the most part, had stayed quiet while Sam had gone through his story, occasionally letting out an "oh, goodness" or "the poor thing".

"He was just really sad, mama, and I wanted to make him feel better."

"I know, Sammy," Jodi said, pulling him into a hug and rubbing his back. "You're a good friend to him."

Still with his arms wrapped around his mother, he asks, "would it be ok if we have a sleepover?"

"Sure, if Sebby and Robin are ok with it." Jodi pulls back with a smile as Sam begins to bounce with excitement. "I'll give Robin a call."

"Can we build a blanket fort in the livingroom? And watch movies all night? And have some maple bars and hot chocolate later? And—"

"Woah, woah, Sam! Slow down! Why don't you boys go start the fort while I call Seb's mother and finish warming the soup? After lunch you can watch movies and we can decide the rest later." Sam is already out the door before his mom finishes her last sentence.

Sam nearly trips over his feet as he came to a stop in front of the couch. "Sebby! Mom said you can stay for a sleepover!"

Sebastian's eyes widened with excitement. "Really? This'll be so much fun!"

"Mama said we can build a blanket fort while we wait for lunch to be ready." Sam shouts, already running to the closet in the hall to grab as many blankets as he can.

The fort is almost finished by the time Jodi calls them into the kitchen. They eat their soup and the warmed rolls that Jodi had made yesterday, chatting about which movies they were going to watch — "We have to watch the new Spiderman movie, Sammy!", "We can watch that then after we can watch Wumbus!".

As they settle into their fort, ready for a long night of movies and fun, Sebastian suddenly gets up and runs to the hall. When he comes back, he places the clam shell Sam had found beside him.

"Thank you, Sammy. For making me feel better when I was sad about my dad." He says in a quiet, shy voice.

Sam pulls him into a hug. "Of course, Sebby! You're my best friend. I'll always be here to cheer you up! I love you!"

Chapter Text

“Sebastian, that’s enough!”

Sam paused outside the door, hand hovering over the knob. He could just imagine the argument happening inside. He yanked his backpack tighter onto his shoulder, debating if he should go in or wait for a little.

Shifting on his feet, he decides to stay outside the house, waiting. A breeze wrapped around him, making him shiver a little despite the hot late August sun shining down on him. After a few minutes, and hearing no more raised voices, he takes a deep breath and opens the door, bell ringing as per usual as he does.

He was expecting Robin to be in her usual spot at the counter she used for work in the front room but her chair is empty. The rest of the house seems quiet, so Sam toes off his shoes and silently makes his way down to the basement. He hesitates at Sebastian’s door briefly, listening for any noises coming from it, before going inside.

Sebastian is sitting at his desk in front of his computer. Sam catches him wiping his cheek before he clears his throat.

“Hey, Sam.” Sebastian says, voice betraying his emotions, smile not quite reaching his eyes.

“Hey.” Sam says, sitting on the couch just to the left of the door and setting his bag down beside him.

He eyes Sebastian, rubbing the back of his neck. “What’s wrong, Sebby?”

“Nothing. Everything’s fine.” Sebastian's reply is almost immediate. He doesn't meet his gaze.

Sam pauses, biting his lip. He, of course, knows that Sebastian had had an argument with his step-father Demetrius. He also knows not to push Sebastian on telling him what happened. Seb usually will just get more grumpy about it until they have an argument.

Sam sighs quietly and grabs his backpack. “Okay. I brought snacks.” Unzipping the bag, he takes out a large bag of Doritos and another of Cheetos, and a container with his mom’s maple bars in it. He then pulls out another box and holds it up for Sebastian.

“Are you sure about this?”

Sebastian jumps out of his chair, moving around his desk, and taking the box of black hair dye from Sam’s hand. His lips pull into the first genuine smile since Sam came into the room.

“Yes! This is perfect!” He exclaims.

“And you’re sure you’re not going to get into trouble?”

“Whatever. I’m fourteen. I can do what I want with my hair. You know I hate it. And changing it now before we start high school in a couple days is the perfect time to do it!”

Sam is well aware of how much Seb doesn’t like his red hair. It’s one of the multiple things about his features that he has complained about for years. He has always been told that he doesn’t really look like Robin, only inheriting her ears. He otherwise is a spitting image of his father. Most people assumed Seb got his hair from his mom but most people didn’t know that his dad also has red hair. Sam had only ever seen a couple photos of Seb’s dad but even he could notice how much they looked alike.

“Okay.” Sam responds, uncertain. “What do you want to do first?”

Sebastian inspects the box of dye. “Well… from what I read, you’re supposed to keep the dye on for about 30 minutes before you rinse it out. Why don’t we start with this and then we can play games before I wash it out?”

“Yeah, sure. That works.”

Just then the bedroom door opens and Robin walks in carrying a large pizza box. Sebastian jumps as the door opens, hiding the box in his hands behind him. Robin’s eyes narrow slightly at his sudden movement but she doesn’t comment on it.

“Hey boys! Pizza arrived!”

“Thanks, mom.” Sebastian mumbles at the same time Sam exclaims “thanks, Robin!”. Sam moves forward to take the box from her hands.

“So what are you boys up to tonight? Movies? Games?” The grin on her face turns mischievous. “Talking about girls?” Robin adds with a wink.

“Mooom!” Sebastian whines, extending out the word.

“Okay, okay. You guys have fun. I’ll be upstairs if you need anything.” She says as she turns, closing the door behind her as she leaves the room.

Sam hears Seb exhale as he throws the box of hair dye on the desk and collapses onto the couch. “That was close! Maybe we should wait to do that –,” Seb nods towards the box, “later tonight. Once mom goes to bed.”

Sam rolls his eyes at him. “I thought you said you wouldn’t get in trouble.”

A smirk slowly spreads from the corner of Sebastian's lips. “No, I didn’t. I said that I can do whatever I want with my hair. I’m not really sure mom will care but Demetrius will probably freak out.”

Sam thought about it. Sebastian was able to do a lot of things he wanted to do. Robin let him decorate his room however he liked. He was allowed to watch what he wanted and listen to whatever music he was into at the time. He had posters of his favourite bands and games up on the walls. Robin had built him a small, low table recently when he got into Solorian Chronicles. He was allowed to pick his own clothes and she didn’t complain when his colour choice started to move to a darker palette. She even let him get his ears pierced a couple months ago.

Demetrius, on the other hand… yeah, he was probably going to freak. Sam had overheard him tell Robin that she let Sebastian do too much. “He needs to be more grown up” Demetrius would say. "I’m fourteen!” Sebastian would argue back. He complained about Sebastian playing video games or Solorian Chronicles or being on his computer because they weren’t going to do anything for his future. 

“Well, make sure I’m not here in the morning when they find out.”

“Relax. You’re not doing anything.”

For some reason, Sam doesn’t really feel comforted by that. No, he’s not the one dying his hair but he can’t help but feel like he’s going to get in trouble by association. After all, he was the one who picked up the dye from the brand new Joja Mart on his way here.

Suddenly Sebastian jumps off the couch, clapping his hands once. “Okay. New plan. Let’s eat and watch a movie. Then maybe we can play a game for a bit then dye my hair.”

“Yeah, ok. We can do that. What movie did you want to watch?”

Sebastian grins and walks over to the bookshelf he keeps his movies on. He pulls 2 DVDs off the shelf, holding them in front of him so Sam can see. “I just bought these! I knew you would want to watch Wumbus and I also got It Howls in the Rain. We can watch both, if you want. Do you want to do funny first or scary?”

Sam thought about it. On the one hand, he was really excited to see Wumbus. It was his favourite movie. But he wasn’t the biggest fan of scary movies, so maybe he wanted to follow it up with a funny movie? Sebastian’s room didn’t have a window, so it wasn’t like they had to worry about the room not being dark enough to watch It Howls in the Rain during the day.

“We can watch your movie first then Wumbus.”

“Works for me!” Sebastian exclaimed as he moved to his TV to start getting the movie ready. Sam busied himself by dropping the pizza on the small table and pulling it closer to the couch. He then moved over to the mini fridge Seb had and pulled out a Joja Cola for himself and a water for Sebastian.

Before settling onto the couch beside Sam, Seb turned off his bedroom light. The room was completely dark save for the soft purple glow coming from the lava lamp on Seb’s bedside table. Sam starts the movie once Seb sits and they both tuck into the pizza.

“Really? They never find out what it is?” Sam exclaims at the end of It Howls in the Rain.

“The noise kinda sounded like a frog. Like maybe a mix of a couple, like a bullfrog and a pig frog. Plus, it was raining the whole time and frogs love the rain. You watch, at the end of the sequel, a frog will jump out of a bush and they’ll figure it out.”

“That would be such a dumb ending!” Sam says, getting up to switch the movies, putting in Wumbus.

“Maybe it’ll be a giant frog! That would be cool!”

Sam grins as he sits back down beside him. “You and frogs, man," he teases as he leans forward to grab one of the last slices of pizza.

Just as the credits start to roll at the end of Wumbus, there’s a knock at the door, making them both jump.

“Hey, guys!” Robin says as she pushes the door open. “Just checking to see how things are going.”

“We just finished watching Wumbus! It was really good!” Sam says excitedly.

“Well that’s good! Are you guys done with the pizza?” Robin asks. She moves forward to take the empty box when they both nod. “Okay. I'm going to read for a bit before going to bed. It’s already after 10, so don’t stay up too late. Let me know if you need anything.” She says over her shoulder as she walks back out of the room.

Sam starts to turn to Sebastian once the door closes to ask what he wants to do now but Sebastian is already off the couch, walking towards the door to turn the light back on then turning and walking to the desk. He grabs the box of dye with a large grin.

“It’s time!” He says, opening the box and taking out the contents. “Okay, so there’s conditioner – why do I need that? – something labeled A and this one is labeled B and this must be instructions.”

Sam watches as Seb opens the paper packet, watches as gloves drop out onto the desk, and watches as Seb reads. And reads. And reads.

“Are you going to read the whole thing? The instructions can’t be that complicated.”

“Oh, no, they’re not. I just have to put this –” He picks up the tube labeled B “and put it into the other one –” He points to the bottle labeled A “and mix them together. Then put it on my hair, wait 30 minutes, then wash it off. Seems pretty simple.”

Sebastian looks around the room, eyebrows furrowed. “Might as well do this in here. The bathroom down here is white and I’m not doing this in the upstairs one.”

“Is there an old blanket or something you can sit on? I don’t think you want to get black dye on the floor, or the couch, or your desk chair, or –”

“Yes, Sam. I can get a blanket.” Sebastian says with a laugh.

Sam pulls his legs up on the couch, sitting cross-legged, as he watches as Seb leaves the room. He hears the door of the closet in the hall creak open then close before Sebastian walks back into the room. He lays the blanket down on the floor before pausing, tilting his head slightly with pursed lips, and walks back out of the room. Sam starts to wonder what Sebastian had forgotten before he comes back with a tabletop mirror and comb.

“Oh that’s a good idea! I didn’t think of that!” Sam tells him.

“Yeah, I don’t really want to mess this up. At least not the first time. If I mess it up this time, there’ll be pieces of my red hair showing through.”

Sam pushes the Solorian table closer to where Sebastian had set down the blanket. Sebastian sets the mirror on it before his hands start to move towards the bottles to mix them.

“Do you want to wear that shirt, Seb?” Sam asks, realizing Seb is wearing one of his favourite shirts. “I know it’s already black but you probably don’t want to get dye on it.”

“Oh, yeah! You’re right.” Sam watches as Seb moves to his dresser and paws through his shirts. He considers a few shirts before deciding on one, changing out of his band shirt and into an old red shirt with green frogs all over it. Sebastian then looks down at his jeans before sighing and walking to his walk-in closet. When he comes back out, he's wearing an old pair of green sweatpants. He makes his way to the table, settling on the blanket.

Sam smirks at him. “You good? I think this is the most colour I’ve seen you wear in, like, a year”

“Shut up.” Seb mumbles, rolling his eyes. “I didn’t want to get dye on my pants either and I don’t wear these anymore.”

“Well, while you do that, I’m going to play a game.”

As Sebastian starts combing the knots out of his hair, Sam gets up and walks to the TV. He takes out the Wumbus DVD, putting it back in it’s case before walking to the bookshelf. Putting the DVD back first, he then studies the games. He takes out one with a smile, puts it into the console and turns it on, grabbing the wireless controller before sitting back on the couch.

By the time the music starts on the game, Sebastian is done combing his hair. “Oh, nice! Goldeneye! Once I’m done putting this stuff on my hair I’m going to kick your butt!”

“Nope, not this time! I’ve been practicing!”

By the time Sam starts a new game, Sebastian has moved on to mixing the two bottles of the dye. Sam watches him out of the corner of his eye. Concentration spreads across Sebastian’s face as he pours the goo from the tube into the goo in the bottle. He then put the cap back on, shaking it like crazy.

Sam’s attention is pulled back to the game as the sound of gunshots ring out, then the music letting him know his character was killed blares.

Chuckling, Sebastian teases, “I thought you said you were practicing?”

“Shut up! I was watching you mix the dye!”

Sam continues to watch as Seb sets the bottle down, satisfied he mixed it enough. He grabs the plastic gloves that had been folded into the instructions and pulls them on.

“Why are these so big?” Sebastian frowns at his hands, dwarfed by the way too large gloves.

Sam rolls his eyes. “It’s supposed to be for adults, Seb.”

Letting out a sigh, Sebastian looks over the instructions again. “Okay. I think I just put this on my hair now.” His voice sounds hesitant and he was biting his lower lip, and Sam notes that his hand shook ever so slightly as he reached for the bottle.

“You know you don't have to do this, right, Sebby?” Sam says in a quiet voice.

He watches as Sebastian squares his shoulders, sitting straighter from his place on the floor. His brows furrow briefly before a smirk appears on his lips.

“No, I'm doing it.” He says, mind made up.

Without any further hesitation, Sebastian moves the bottle of dye over the top of his head and squeezes. Black goo plops onto his hair and Seb empties almost half of the bottle on his head before he sets it down and begins rubbing the dye into his hair like it was shampoo.

Game completely forgotten, Sam watches as Sebastian pushes the dye through his hair, tip of his tongue sticking out as he concentrates on the edges near his face to make sure the roots are covered.

Sam knew it would be a messy process – it's why he suggested Seb sit on an old blanket and change his clothes – but he didn't really realize how messy it would be. Dye covered Seb's ears and forehead. He watched a glob fall from Seb's bangs, leaving a black streak on his cheek before hitting his shirt and coming to a rest on his pants. He could only imagine what the back of Seb's neck looked like.

As his eyes track another drop that lands on Seb's shirt, he couldn't help but laugh. “You're making such a mess! I think you put too much on! It's a good thing you got that blanket.”

“Yeah, well I'll know for next time,” Seb frowns. He stares at himself in the small mirror, carding his fingers in his hair, lifting strands as he inspects himself. “Okay, I think I got it all. Can you check the back and make sure there's no red?”

Sam moves off the couch, coming around behind Sebastian. He leans in as Sebastian moves his hair around, checking to see if there's any missed spots.

Not seeing any bits of red left, he moves back to the couch. “No, I think you got it all.”

“Ok, cool.” Sebastian walks to his computer, pressing the mouse a few times.

He starts to move to the couch before pausing and throwing a look over his shoulder at his back. “Shit, I shouldn't sit on the couch with this shirt on. It's probably covered in dye.”

He sits back down on the blanket, crossing his legs in front of him and leaning over to pluck a Dorito from the bag on the table. “Now we just need to wait 30 minutes.”

Leaning forward again, Sebastian grabs the game controller off the table, pressing the controls to start the level again.

Sam watches him play for a moment but he can't stop his brain from flicking back to when he had first arrived here earlier. He assumes that Sebastian and Demetrius had gotten into another fight. He also assumes that it was particularly bad since he had caught Seb wiping his cheeks when he walked into the room.

He rubs the back of his neck, trying to figure out if he should ask him about it. Sebastian is the type of person who doesn't like to talk about things, instead bottling them up until he gets sad and quiet.

Turning back to the game, Sam tries to keep his tone light, “so what was up with earlier? I heard Demetrius yelling about something.”

Out of the corner of his eye, he sees Seb's hand still on the controller for a couple seconds, twisting his lips to one side, before continuing his game character along the corridor.

“There was a programming thing I wanted to do but I can't. Whatever. It's fine,” Sebastian huffs out his answer.

Oh shit, Sam thought. Knowing Seb for as long as he did, he knew that he was more upset than he was letting on. The more upset he was about something, the more he would pretend it didn't bother him.

Sam leans forward, taking a couple of Doritos from the bag and popping them in his mouth. “What was the program?”

Sebastian's jaw tightened before he spoke. “It was just a stupid after school thing a couple days a week. It doesn't matter.”

“It was cool enough you wanted to do it after school. Was it going to help with making a game or a website or something?”

Sebastian let's out a sigh, clearly realizing Sam wasn't going to easily let the fight go, and tosses the controller on the table before pulling his knees up to his chest. “It was going to help me learn how to do more advanced stuff, and, yeah, it would have helped me with making a game. Would have helped me with that website I've been working on too.” Sebastian let's out another long sigh and drops his chin to his knee. “Not that it matters though. Demetrius said I can't do it.”

“Why?” Sam asks, tilting his head, eyebrows pulling together a little.

“Because someone has to look after Maru while him and mom are working.” Sebastian says with a mocking tone.

Sebastian pauses for a couple seconds before letting out a groan. “Ugh! I always get stuck watching her! I couldn't go play video games with Abby a few weeks ago because Demetrius was doing whatever he does by the community center and mom was working on something for Marnie. Last week, when you wanted to show that skateboard thing you were working on, I couldn't because they both wanted to go to Grampleton and I got stuck watching her. Even my birthday! Us and Abby were supposed to hang out and watch movies but we couldn't because Demetrius got mom those stupid play tickets in Zuzu.”

Sam remains silent as Sebastian vents, keeping his voice low but angry.

“It's so annoying. Maru just needs to bat her eyes and Demetrius will give her whatever she wants. She builds yet another robot, or even just aces a test, and she gets praised like she's the first person to ever do something like that. I've come home with an A on a test or paper and Demetrius doesn't even look up from his stupid lab work. At the end of last semester, when I came home with A's and B's on my report card, mom just said ‘good job’. Maru did the same thing and they brought her out for a day in Zuzu.”

Sebastian was on his feet now, walking around his room in an aimless pattern, fists moving between being clenched at his sides to being twisted together against his chest.

“She was even allowed to go to that STEM camp a couple months ago and play with robots all day! That same program has coding classes but I couldn't do that because Demetrius didn't want me to ‘play on the computer all day’” Sebastian drops his hands back to his sides after using his fingers for air quotes.

Letting out a deep sigh, he sits on the table. “I'm just so sick of them not caring about what I like or what I do. Why is Maru’s interest in robotics and engineering more important than my interest in coding and programming?”

Sam sat silently for a moment. This wasn't the first time that Sebastian had complained about how Demetrius would compare him to Maru, Seb’s eleven year old half-sister, who spent her time usually tinkering with something, often taking something apart and putting it back together to see how it worked.

Sam always thought it was weird Demetrius didn’t think Sebastian’s interests would help him with what he wanted to do when he was a grown up. Sebastian often talked about wanting to make video games. He really loved, and spent a lot of time, coding things on his computer and had been working on a website for a little while. Being the DM when they played Solorian Chronicles showed how creative he was. Sebastian was so good at coming up with the story and the challenges that they would have to overcome.

To Demetrius though, real work was doing physical experiments in a lab and getting results. Real work was tearing down a computer or robot and putting it back together to see how it worked. Real work was taking a piece of wood and shaping it into something or making something with it.

Real work was not sitting and playing on a computer all day.

"Okay, well…" Sam starts, pausing briefly and biting his bottom lip. "Have you tried showing him? Maybe he would be more interested in it if he saw what it is that you do?"

Sebastian scoffs at him, crossing his arms. "No! He wouldn't care about me working on that website or a game."

"But he would use some type of programming for his work, right? He would have to put all his research stuff somewhere? Does he use something like, I don't know, Excel? You're already good at using the different codes and stuff for that. Maybe you could ask him about what he uses and maybe there could be some code or something you could help him with to make it easier?"

Sebastian gazes in his direction for a moment, not really looking at him as he thought. His eyebrows were furrowed, lips twisted to one side like he was trying to work out a puzzle.

A sharp ringing sounded from Seb's computer, making both boys jump.

Sebastian pops off the table quickly, rushing to the computer to turn it off. "Shit, I kinda forgot about my hair for a second. Now I have to wash this out then blow dry it. I'll be back."

Sam watches Sebastian grab a clean change of jammies then walk out the room to the washroom. He looked at the game controller on the table as he felt a pang of guilt in his chest. He knew he hadn't helped Sebastian with his problem but he wasn't really sure how to fix it, if it could be fixed.

He did genuinely think that if Demetrius sat with him for a little bit, saw what it was that Sebastian was able to do, it would help. The thought of Seb making Demetrius a website for his own research crossed his mind, making him huff out a small laugh.

His smile faded as the guilt tightened when he thought of his own interests, playing the guitar and skateboarding, and how his parents had encouraged them — well, his dad more than his mom, but still. His mom hated when he tried to learn new tricks on his skateboard — well, she mostly hated needing to bring him to Doctor Harvey every time he got a bump, which wasn't super often — but his dad would pause whatever he was doing as he tried a new trick on his board.

He also knew money was tight with the family, so he was sure his parents would say no if he asked for guitar lessons, but that hadn't stopped his mom from buying him a couple music books or getting him some new picks. Sam's favourite had pizza slices on it. And his dad would always stop to listen to him play a few bars of song he was learning.

With a sigh, he leaned forward to grab a couple chips from the bag, popping them in his mouth as he grabbed the controller and started the level again.

It was about 20 minutes later that Sebastian sheepishly came back into the room. "Well?" He asked quietly, tugging at pieces of now-black hair.

"Wow! That's a change!" Sam blurts out, almost immediately kicking himself internally as he watches as Sebastian's face fell a little.

"A bad change?" Sebastian almost sounds defeated, like it was just one more thing against him that he had dared be interested in.

"No!" Sam nearly shouts at him. Lowering his voice a little, he continues, "No, Sebby. It looks really good on you. It looks really cool!"

Sebastian walks to the table, gazing at himself in the hand-held mirror. "Really? Do you think mom and Demetrius will like it?"

"Who cares? Do you like it? You're the one who's going to have to live with it. At least until it fades out." Sam flashes him a large, lopsided smile.

Watching his reflection as he moves pieces of hair around, Seb's lips pull into a wide grin. "Yeah, I think I do really like it!"

"Good!" Sam suddenly jumps off the couch, moving to the bookshelf. Turning back around, he holds up Sebastian's Polaroid camera, a gift from his dad a few years ago. "Come here! We need a picture of this!"

"Sam, no. I don't need to take a photo of this!" Sebastian groans as he protests. Seb never really liked having his picture taken.

"Nope, don't care. We need to document this! The first time you dyed your hair. Smile!"

Sebastian rolls his eyes but still puts on a small smile as Sam presses the button. Within a few seconds, Sam grabs the picture that had popped out, waving it around a little before setting it down on the bookshelf to finish developing.

"Now, come here. We need one together!"

Sebastian groans again. "Sam, you already got a picture!"

"Yeah but we haven't taken one together in forever, so why not now?" He puts on his best please face until Sebastian relents.

"Fine. One more!" He says with a deep sigh, moving to stand next to Sam who holds up the camera in front of them.

"And it better be a nice picture!" Sam frowns at him.

Rolling his eyes again, Seb wraps an arm around Sam's shoulders. "Okay, okay. Just take the picture!"

With a click and a small pause, the photo slides out. Sam, again, gives it a small wave before setting it down on the bookshelf beside the other photo.

"Hey, Sam?" The tone of Sebastian's voice catches Sam's attention. "Thanks. For earlier. With the thing with Demetrius. I think maybe I will see if he would be interested in me showing him programming stuff."

Sam beams at him. "Good! I think it really will help!"

Sam watches as Seb takes a breath, appearing to want to say something else, before he pauses then pulls Sam into a hug. "Thanks," he mumbles again.

"You're my best friend, Sebby! I'll always support you, no matter what! I love you!"

Chapter Text

"Ok, Sam! I'm ready!" Jodi calls loudly.

Sam takes a sharp inhale through his nose, eyes flying open as he's startled awake, before immediately pressing his eyes shut again with a groan as the sun pooling into his bedroom from his window burns them.

He rubs a hand over his face and sighs. Lifting his head a little, he looks over at the clock on his nightstand. 9:45am.

"Samson, hurry up! I'm going to be late!" The pitch in Jodi's voice raises as she calls out.

"Okay, okay!" Sam calls back, voice still low and gravely from sleep. "I'm up! One second!"

It takes him a mere 60 seconds to hop out of bed, grab the sweatpants off his floor and pull them on, and get to the livingroom — which he thinks is pretty good timing, if he says so — before halting to a stop as Jodi levels an irritated glare at him.

"About time! I've been waiting forever!" Shoving his baby brother into his arms, Jodi quickly begins moving towards the front door. Vince watches after her with a scrunched up face, a whimper escaping his lips. "Great, I'm probably going to be late now! I won't be back until later. Call Caroline if you need anything."

Without waiting for Sam to respond, Jodi is out the door, slamming it shut behind her. Sam cringes at the force with which Jodi closes the door behind her. He swears under his breath, low and barely audible.

He warily eyes Vincent, who now watches him back. "It's okay," he says gently, soothingly.

He watches as Vincent's eyes grow wide and bottom lip trembles ever so slightly. "No, no. You're fine. It was just a silly loud noise, you're okay," he coos desperately, bringing out as much baby talk as he can, bouncing gently from side to side.

He watches helplessly as tears begin to pool in Vincent's eyes. "No, please. You're fine, you're —". His pleas fall short with the 4 month old in his arms as Vince lets out an ear-splitting wail.

The sigh he lets out through his nose is sharp as he bites on his bottom lip to stop the frustrated yell from escaping his lips.

For fuck sake! Every Yoba damn time!

Jodi is well aware that Vince is not a fan of loud sounds. He would get upset when Sam would play with his guitar with the amp on; he would scream when the neighbours would, without warning, yell greetings to each other, heard through an open window; He would wail inconsolably when the home phone, of all things, would ring. Sam is almost convinced she slammed the door on purpose, punishment because he wasn't magically out of his room in less than 60 seconds.

Vincent's screams pierce the silence, shattering the air like glass. His small body shakes and heaves, breaths coming in ragged and shallow with the effort. He had already appeared to be affected by the brief tension in the room before Jodi left, so now, with the shock of the abrupt loud noise, Sam knows nothing but time will calm him down when he's in this state.

Despite this, Sam still paces the home with Vince in his arms, bouncing as he goes, softly singing random songs that pop into his head. Every wail, every uneven breath makes Sam's chest tighten knowing there is little he could do but comfort his brother as best he could.

It takes about 45 minutes before the ear-splitting wails calm to just weeps and another 20 minutes before only the occasional whimper and sob come from him. Thankfully, Sam knows that his brother will be beyond exhausted from the whole ordeal and, conveniently, it's now after 11am when he would normally go down for his mid-morning nap.

Moving into Vince's room, Sam turns on the CD player already set up with his favourite lullaby's and grabs a couple books before sitting in the rocking chair in the corner of the room.

"Ok, Vince. It's been quite a morning, huh?" Vincent's wide grey eyes look up at him, stuttering breaths and whimpers still escaping him. "Yeah, I know. But you're ok. Now, let's find out about The Poky Little Puppy."

Vincent's eyes move to the book as Sam works to open it one handed. His hand reaches towards it, making a small whine as he tries to grab the puppies on the page.

"Five little puppies dug a hole under the fence and went for a walk in the wide, wide world."

Sam keeps his voice calm, low, and steady as he reads. He gaze moves between the words on the page and Vincent's face, watching as his eyes droops as he struggles to stay awake. As the story progresses, more of the tension melts from Vince's small body and he curls into Sam with a fist tightening into his shirt.

By the time the story finishes, Vince is sound asleep. Sam continues to rock him for a few more minutes to make sure he wouldn't wake when Sam transfers him to his crib. When it was time, it took a little coaxing to uncurl Vince's fist from his shirt but he manages a successful transfer.

Making his way back to the living room, Sam flops onto the couch with a deep groan, burying his head into a pillow.

It was quiet. Blissfully quiet with the exception of the soft ticking of grandfather clock in the hall and the soothing melody of Twinkle, Twinkle, Little Star coming from the baby monitor on the coffee table.

He ached everywhere. He could pretty much count on his hands how many hours of sleep he had gotten in the last week. He was both starving and nauseous. And he was pretty sure that his head was splitting into two.

I'm never having a fucking kid.

He didn't understand how people did this. His brother Vincent was a little over 4 months old now and, sure he was cute, but man were babies hard.

At least when Vincent had been born in April, Sam was still able to go to school for a break from the seemingly never-ending crying and feeding and diaper changes. His studies had suffered a little and his grades dropped, but he had been able to scrap by with passing grades with the help of his best friend Sebastian. For the first time in his life, school had felt like a relief, a longing break from the chaos that his home had become.

Okay, maybe that was a bit dramatic.

Vincent wasn't that bad of a baby, really. Sure he cried a lot – like, a lot a lot – but it's not like he could use words yet to tell them when he was tired or hungry or wet. To his surprise, it hadn't taken Sam long to figure out what his cries meant. And his mom had been quick to comfort Vince when he did start to cry. Sam mostly helped with feedings and diapers, which he really didn't mind doing. He just didn't realize that a baby would eat and poop as much as Vince did.

It was only so bad now because he was out of school, which meant his mom started to rely on him more and more for Vincent's care. His dad, Kent, had been deployed a month ago to the front lines of the war with the Gotoro Empire, so there were less hands helping with Vince and the household in general.

Despite the lack of help, Jodi had even started going to Caroline's every Tuesday for aerobics, often staying until later in the night gossiping with her and Robin — although Sam can't figure out for the life of him what they could possibly be gossiping about for hours on end. Sam was happy to see his mom back out with her friends. She hadn't gone to aerobics and been around people much for the first three months.

Sam couldn't help but feel bitter about it, though, because it wasn't just Tuesdays. His mother left a few times during the week for Pierre's. Normally she would shop at Joja Mart a couples times a week to pick up groceries or more baby supplies but she's been going more and more to Pierre's, spending a couple hours there. Caroline had recently finished building a tea room just behind their kitchen and Jodi would go over to have tea, again for few hours here and there.

This left Sam to take care of Vincent more times than not, it felt like. Which Sam didn't overly mind, although he also didn't have much of a choice. He knew his mother was struggling with his father being in an active war; having to be, essentially, a single parent to an infant and teenager; and running the household alone.

Sam knew he really shouldn't complain about the situation. He had a roof over his head, food on the table. So what if he didn't have a lot of free time, right now? He had to help his mother.

Besides, he had one more year of high school then he could maybe go to college or university, or get a cool job and an apartment in Zuzu. He was trying to convince his best friends Seb and Abigail to start a band and maybe they could get really good and start playing gigs.

His heart sank a little at the thought of his friends. The last time he had seen Sebastian and Abigail was for his seventeenth birthday a few weeks ago, when they had a sleepover at Seb's watching movies and playing video games. It had been even longer since he had seen his friend Penny. And it's not like they hadn't made plans but something usually came up with his mom and he would have to cancel their hangout to stay home with Vince.

Right on cue, as if Yoba themself heard him, his phone's ding breaks the near silence in the room. If he had to guess, it was Abigail texting him to play the new Journey to the Prairie King game that was released a couple weeks ago. And he would have to tell her no, yet again, because he was watching Vincent.

With a long groan, Sam blindly reaches toward the coffee table, feeling around for his phone, not lifting his face from the pillow it's pressed against. Once his fingers have wrap around it, he moves his head only enough to read the name on the notification. Sebastian.

A large grin stretches across Sam's face and he quickly moves to sit up, swiping his phone open as he does so.

🐸 Sebby 🐸:

~ im bored

~ wanna play a game or watch a movie or something?

Sam feels excitement bubble in his chest for a split second before the bubble pops. He sighs, typing back:

~ cant

~ on Vincent duty today

🐸 Sebby 🐸:

~ again? WTF

~ does your mom even watch her own kid?

~ we havent hung out in weeks

Sam:

~ she has an aerobics class or whatever at Caroline's

~ every Tuesday

~ then they usually spend the rest of the day gossiping with your mom

🐸 Sebby 🐸:

~ when was the last time you even went outside?

Sam frowns. What an odd thing for Sebastian, of all people, to bring up.

~ your one to talk lol

🐸 Sebby 🐸:

~ yeah but I hate outside

~ you like outside

~ you know what, I'll figure out something we can do

Sam rolls his eyes.

~ baby duty, remember?

After no response for a few minutes, Sam types again.

~ seb?

Sam groans, laying back down and pressing his face into the pillow. His chest feels heavy. His mom needs him. His dad told him, before he left, that he would have to step up and be the man of the house. But he missed his friends. He missed doing dumb stuff, teenager stuff.

He checks his phone a few minutes after his last text, lips twisting to the side in mild annoyance. Still no response. He knew that he was being the worst person in the world by not being able to ever hang out with his friends but they could still text with him, he just couldn't go out.

With a deep sigh, he tosses his phone back onto the coffee table, burying his face back into the pillow.

Sam would have sworn that his eyes were only closed for a few seconds when he was startled awake by a knock on the door. Taking a quick peek at the baby monitor and seeing that Vincent was still asleep, he quickly moved off the couch to the door before the person could knock again.

"Hey!" Sebastian says cheerfully as Sam opened the door. A frown pulls at his lips a second later. "You look like shit."

"Thanks, man. Appreciate it." Sam deadpans, moving aside for Seb to step into the home.

As Sebastian scoots by him, Sam mentally curses himself as his eyes flick over him. Try as he might, he really can't help it, it's almost reflexive at this point. Sebastian had traded the black hoodie he nearly always wore for a band t-shirt that, annoyingly, fit him really well. He still wore his typical black skinny jeans with rips in the knees.

Damn, he looks good today, he thinks before mentally kicking himself with a small, nearly inaudible sigh.

Concern spreads across Seb's features as he turns and studies Sam's face. "Dude, have you been sleeping at all? I think I could use your eye bags for luggage."

"Ha ha, funny," Sam says, monotoned. "Umm… I just had a nap, I guess. At least the last 20 or so minutes it took you to get here. Which, by the way — not that I'm not happy to see you — but… you know I'm on Vince duty and he's napping right now."

Sebastian levels him with a lopsided smile, holding up a game cartridge in his hand. "I haven't beaten your ass at Goldeneye in forever. Wanna see how many times I can kill you before Vinny wakes up?"

Narrowing his eyes and smirking at the proposed challenge, Sam replies, "You're on!"

As they move from the entrance to the living room, Sam's stomach lets out a loud growl. "Have you not eaten yet?" Sebastian looks at him in shock.

"Umm, no. Mom had woken me up and shoved Vincent at me so fast, I couldn't make anything. Then Vince started freaking out and that took me over an hour to get him down for a nap…" Sam rubs the back of his neck. "Then I kinda fell asleep, so no."

The concern is back on Sebastian's face before Sam stopped talking. Seb holds out the game for Sam to take. "Okay. Here, you set this up. Pick whichever level and weapons, I'm fine with whatever. I'm going to throw in a frozen pizza."

Sam takes the game and, without another word, Seb walks away into the kitchen. Relief and gratitude wash over him as he realizes just how tired and hungry he actually is. His friends and family often joke about how much he eats, so forgetting to eat concerns even him a little. He briefly wonders if his mother realizes how little he was sleeping or eating but he forcefully pushes the thought out of his head.

Thank Yoba for Seb. He thought with a smile as he readied the game.

By the time Sam had the game ready and is settled on the couch, Sebastian comes around the corner. Sitting down beside Sam, he picks up a controller off the coffee table.

"Pizza's in and I set a timer. Ready for me to kick your ass?" Sebastian smirks at him.

Sam scoffs. "Please! I'm going to kick your ass!"

They play several rounds, pausing only for a break to eat the pizza — which was only a little burnt as the timer had gone off mid-level and neither had heard the ding sound from the livingroom. Thankfully, Sebastian had gloated only a little at beating him each time, even commenting that Sam had almost beat him a couple of the rounds.

As they settled back onto the couch after taking a small break to refresh beverages and use the washroom, a whimper sounds from the baby monitor on the coffee table. Sam's head swivels towards it, shushing Seb as he stares.

"Come on. Turn over and go back to sleep," He mutters.

He holds his breath for a few seconds as more whimpers come from the monitor before a wail breaks the silence.

"Fuck," he sighs, dropping his head.

He starts getting up from the couch to grab Vince but Sebastian places a hand on his thigh to stop him. Sam freezes at the touch, breath hitching in his throat, and he's pretty sure that his heart stopped.

Seb smiles at him as he raises from the couch. "It's ok, I got him."

It takes a couple seconds for Sam's brain to work again, another couple seconds for him to process what Sebastian said. The spot on his thigh where Seb had touched burned hot, which wasn't helping with his concentration.

Once his brain finally catches up, Sam's eyebrows pull together in confusion. "Dude, you hate kids!"

"Yep, I do!" Sebastian says lightheartedly as he rounds the corner into the bedroom.

"But I don't hate you! No, I don't, Vinny!" Sebastian's quiet coos come from the monitor. "You're actually kinda cute. Yes you are! Good morning! Did you have a good nap?"

A warm feeling spreads through Sam's chest as he listens to his best friend talking to his brother, so sweet and gentle.

Sam loved watching Seb with his baby brother. It was so heartwarming yet odd at the same time. Sebastian didn't shy away from his dislike of babies. He would scrunch his face when he was around them, said they made him uncomfortable and he didn't know what to do with them.

But with Vincent, it was like he was a natural. He would talk to him and play with him like Vince was his own brother. Sam assumed it was because Seb had been around Vince since he was born, so he had grown use to him. There haven't been any other babies in Pelican Town for him to be around since his half-sister Maru was a baby.

He's so good with him.

The smile on his face slides away as the thought makes him groan in embarrassment as he covers his face with his hands, letting out a deep sigh.

He had realized his crush on Sebastian a few months ago but refused to acknowledge it further. He even reasoned with himself that they'd been best friends since they were six, it was probably natural for a small crush to develop.

But it was getting harder and harder to just… be normal around him. The impulse to touch him, hug him, kiss him whispered more and more in his ears. And he would do anything he could to hear Sebastian's genuine laugh, even if he had to make himself the butt of the joke.

And it wasn't like Sam would ever act on it. Seb's friendship was way more important to him to ever risk ruining it, especially when he knew that Seb didn't return the same feelings.

Not that Sebastian makes it easy to get over the crush, he thinks, vexed, as his gaze lifts towards the hall as Sebastian comes out of the room with Vincent cuddled in his arms. The sight causes butterflies to flip in Sam's stomach and he quickly averts his eyes as he feels his cheeks heat up.

"Umm… he does smell a little." Sebastian says. "And I think I draw the line at changing him." He turns his attentions back to the baby. "Yes, I do. Sammy will need to change you," He coos at Vincent.

Sam snorts. "I got it." He moves off the couch, reaching out for Vincent. Sebastian chuckles softly as Vince fusses as he's pulled from Seb's arms. As their hands brush during the transfer, Sam can feel his face flush an even deeper red than it was a moment ago, goosebumps moving up his arms like a wave, and he quickly ducks his head.

Way to be a stereotypical teenager, Sam. Touch him in the smallest of ways and start blushing like an idiot. And look at him, he's completely fine. Doesn't even look fazed by you touching his hand. Yoba, stop being so pathetic.

Sam sighs as he sets Vincent down on the change table. In a hushed voice so as to not be overheard by the baby monitor, he playfully scolds his brother, "You're killing me, little dude. You need to stop being cute with him."

Vincent smiles, cooing and babbling up at him in response.

"Oh, you think it's funny? We're bros, man. You're supposed to have my back."

Vincent eyes widen a little as he gazes up at him then starts another string of babbles and small shrieks. Sam finishes the diaper change before going back to the living room, with a brief pause in between to set Vinny in his crib while he washes his hands.

"So, what did you want to do now?" He asks Sebastian. "I can't really do that much with this little guy around."

Seb's lips twist to the side as he watches him, contemplating. Sam can't help but squirm under his gaze, shifting on his feet, willing the butterflies in his stomach to stop flitting around.

"He's got a stroller, right? Seriously, when's the last time you went outside? Why don't we go for a walk?"

"Firstly, love that you're kinda implying that I'm a dog who needs to be walked everyday." Sebastian grins at him. "And secondly, you hate walks and outside and the sun."

Seb rolls his eyes at him. "You are kinda like a dog who needs to be walked. You even go outside and play your game, just to be outside. And I don't hate outside. I'm just not a fan of it." Seb nods his head towards Vincent. "Besides, he'd probably love it. Isn't fresh air good for babies, or something?"

Sam looks down at the baby in his arms. "What do you think, Vinny? Wanna go for a walk outside?"

Vincent lets out a shriek then a few babbles, in a way Sam can only imagine is him happily agreeing to the proposed plan.

"Then it's settled!" Seb gives him a smile as he stands, reaching his hands out for Vince. "I'll take him, you go get changed. I saw the stroller in his room and I'll grab a couple toys, just in case. Oh, does he need sunscreen? And a hat?"

Sam can't help but laugh as he watches as Seb's eyebrows pinch together, biting his lower lip as he looks over Vincent, suddenly seeming to be overwhelmed. "I'll get changed. You just grab the stroller. I'll deal with the rest after."

Warmth blooms through his chest again as they separate and he closes his bedroom door behind him. He presses his back and head against the door before bringing up a hand to run down his face. Oh my Yoba, get it together!

Sam moves away from the door to his dresser. He takes a quick look in the mirror hanging on the wall above it, convinced his face is now permanently red from him blushing so much, frowning as he takes in the flush still colouring his cheeks.

Groaning, he folds his arms atop of the dresser and drops his head on it. You look like a fucking idiot.

He takes a few deep breaths before rummaging through his drawers for a shirt, settling on one of his favourite orange band tees. Walking over to the closet, he grabs a pair of his ripped blue jeans.

As he begins to turn back to his dresser to fix his hair, something on top of his desk catches his eye. He chews on his bottom lip as the stares at them, trying to decide what to do.

Sitting on his desk are three friendship bracelets that he had made the other day, one for himself, Sebastian, and, because he was bored, Vincent — although his mom had been very strict about not putting any kind of jewelry on Vinny yet because he was still too young. He wasn't even sure that he had actually wanted to give Seb's to him. It had been a great distraction from his math homework, though.

He picked up the bracelet, Seb's a twist of black, purple, and green, twirling it on his finger. He pouts as he watches it.

I should just give it to him, he thinks. I mean, I did spend all that time making it. And we are best friends. It doesn't have to mean anything besides that.

Sam turns, facing the dresser, then pauses.

But what if he hates it? What if he thinks it's really stupid? What if he makes fun of me and calls me lame and laughs at me?

Oh my Yoba! His brain continues in an irritated tone. When the fuck has he ever made fun of you for something you made? Hell, even when he does tease you, he never actually means it. Just give him the fucking bracelet.

Sam gives his head a small shake and set his shoulders, determined. He quickly grabs the other bracelet he made for himself off his desk before he could change his mind.

With one final check in the mirror to make sure his hair is relatively in place, Sam walks out of his room. He pauses briefly in the livingroom, immediately noting that Seb and Vince aren't there waiting for him. He rounds the corner back into Vince's room, pausing in the doorway with a smile as Sebastian gently rubs sunscreen over one of Vince's arms.

'Almost ready?"

Sebastian's eyes stay focused on Vince as he picks up his other arm, applying a thick coat of sunscreen. "Almost, just this arm left. I couldn't find a hat, though."

Sam pushes off the doorframe, moving to the dresser and pulling out Vincent's hat. He moves back, leaning close to Sebastian as he puts the hat on Vince's head.

Oh, Seb smells like coconut, Sam notes before immediately straightening and mentally cursing himself as he feels his cheeks flush. Again. At this point, I'm just going to burst into flames next.

"Oh, here. I made you something." Sam holds out the bracelet and Seb reaches out for it as Sam continues. "I made sure to use your favourite colours. It's okay if you don't like it. It's probably stupid," Sam finishes in a rush.

"What? No, Sam, I love it! You made this?" Sebastian twists the bracelet in his hands gently, studying Sam's handiwork.

Sam rubs the back of his neck, letting out the breath he didn't realize he was holding while waiting for Sebastian to respond. "Well, yeah. I got bored the other day doing our math homework." He grins sheepishly. "I made one for you and me. And a small one for Vincent here, even though he's still too little for them."

"Here." Seb holds out one of his hands, using the other to hold out the bracelet for Sam. "Can you put it on me?"

"Really? Yeah, here." Sebastian holds his arm still as Sam ties the bracelet on his wrist.

"Now give me yours and I'll put it on for you," Seb says as he holds out his hand.

A smile tugs at the corners of Sam's mouth as Seb takes the bracelet and ties it around his wrist. Is his face bright red again? More than likely. Did his breathing stop for a moment as Seb's fingers brushed against his skin? Feels like it.

They stand awkwardly for a couple seconds, looking at each other before Sam quietly claps his hands together. "Alright! I think we're ready to go!"

Thirty minutes later, they had made a slow trek towards the community center, walking the path in front of the graveyard and up past the mayor's home. It had been a dry summer and the dirt and grass crunches under their feet. It was still quite hot but there was a nice, light breeze that gently pushed the few leaves that had fallen early across their path.

By the time they had gotten near the saloon, Vincent had started to fuss, not liking being in the stroller for so long. Sebastian nearly made Sam's heart stop when he immediately stopped pushing the stroller and pulled Vince into his arms, and began pointing out random things for him to notice — Dusty, the neighbour boy Alex's dog; a leaf that blew by in the light breeze; a bird that flew past in the sky.

When they got near the bridge to Joja Mart, Sebastian did a dramatic telling of the time, a few years ago, that he and Sam had been using Sam's grandfather's old fishing rod in the lake. When the line got snagged by something, Sam had climbed up onto the parapet of the bridge and pulled with all his might to get the line loose. They both should have realized this was a terrible idea, what with Sam being very clumsy, and that this wouldn't end well.

"And then he fell into the lake!" Sebastian cooed. Vince let out a coo of his own in response. "I know! He didn't get hurt but he was absolutely soaked. And you'll never guess what happened next! A frog jumped out of the lake and smacked him in the face!"

Vince let out a squeal. "I know, it was hilarious. You should have been your brother's face." Sebastian was nearly cackling at the memory.

Sam just rolled his eyes, pouting. "It wasn't that funny, Seb."

They finish making their way to the community center, now sitting on the swings beside it. Seb still firmly holding Vincent, pressing the baby's back to his chest so he can see the world, gently swinging them back and forth. Sam locks the wheels of the stroller before sitting on the swing beside him.

Out of the corner of his eye, he sees Seb turn his head a little in his direction, biting on his lip a little.

"So…" Sebastian starts tentatively before sighing. "I'm just gonna ask and feel free to tell me to fuck off." Sebastian's eyes widen as he looks down. "Oops, Sorry Vinny!" HIs attention turns back to Sam. "What's been going on? This is the first time I've seen you in weeks and every time I've texted you, you were watching Vince. Where has your mom been?" He finishes his question quietly, concern in his tone.

Sam watches his feet very intently as he scuffs them into the dirt beneath him. With the distraction he had today, he had nearly forgotten how his morning had started. How a lot of his mornings have started the last few weeks.

The reminder crashes into him like a bus. He nearly bursts out in laughter — or tears, he's not really sure — as the exhaustion that he had somehow forgotten seeps back into his bones, causing his shoulders to hunch forward and his arms to feel heavy.

He hasn't talked about it, honestly he's not even sure if he can complain. His mom had always done so much for him, he can sacrifice some of his time to watching his baby brother, right? He was the man of the house now, he had responsibilities.

He shrugs, not lifting his gaze from his feet. "Babies are a lot. I'm just helping out."

"Are you? Just helping out, though? Look, maybe I'm wrong, but what does your mom do with him? It literally just seems like you're watching him all the time."

Sam watches Seb with narrowed eyes for a few seconds. "She does everything. She cooks and cleans. Vinny is going through this sleep regression thing, so he doesn't sleep through the night like he was, and mom has been getting up with him. It's just sometimes she needs a bit of a break, so I'll help out."

Sebastian nods, biting his lip. "Are you getting sleep? Look, I mean this in the nicest way, dude, but you look exhausted."

Sam frowns and looks towards the fountain a few meters in front of them. What did Sebastian want him to say? Vincent was only 4 months old, and with their dad deployed, he couldn't leave his mom to take care of him by herself on top of the household.

And sure, she sometimes had a hard time getting out of bed some days between worrying about his dad being deployed to the front lines of an active war and not sleeping at night because of Vincent's sleep regression, so if she was spending more time lately in bed or at Caroline's than she did before, he couldn't exactly complain about that, right?

"… and I know you won't complain about any of it but…", Sebastian continues with a sigh, "I know she's been at Caroline's a lot. Abby's mentioned a few times about how often your mom is there. And never with Vinny, which means he's with you."

"What do you want me to do, Seb?" Sam snaps then winces the next second, rubbing the back of his neck with a groan

Taking a deep breath, he continues more calmly, "Dad's gone, so it's just me and mom. I can't just refuse to help out."

Sam's eyes track as Sebastian licks his lips then begins tapping his fingers lightly on the chain on the swing. "Then call me."

His eyes snap to Seb's, locking for a moment, not quite understanding. "What?"

"Call me. I know I'm not amazing with kids, but when you're left with Vinny for the entire day, like today, let me know and I can come over and help."

He smiles down at Vincent who had started waving his arms around, babbling to himself. "You have to admit, today has been kinda fun. And this dude's pretty cute. Besides, I'd rather you ask for help when you get overwhelmed than, I don't know, running away and just vanishing one day." Sebastian flashes him a lopsided grin.

"Excuse me, I would never just disappear. That would probably be you!" Sam cries in a faux shocked tone, huffing a small laugh through his nose. "And I guess it hasn't been all that bad today."

They fall into silence for a few minutes, Sebastian slowly and gently swinging while holding tightly to Vincent. Sam swings slightly from side to side, watching as a couple birds land in the fountain and begin swimming in circles.

Then call me.

Sebastian's words repeat in his head. If Sam was honest with himself, asking for help was one of the hardest things he could do. He didn't like bothering people, and most things he could figure out on his own. He taught himself to skateboard, he taught himself to play guitar (with some help of the books his mom had bought him). He watched his mom enough that he could confidently prepare Vincent's bottle or change his diaper in record time.

Despite this, he can't help the small smile tugging a corner of his mouth. Sebastian wanting to help with Vincent was a big deal, regardless of what he said. Seb hadn't really been around children since his half-sister Maru was a baby. But even then, she was just three years younger than him, so it's not like he had really taken care of her. Not the way Sam had to take care of Vincent.

Excitement spreads through him as another thought popped in his head, making his heart flutter. This would give you more time with Sebby. Well. That might not be so bad.

The silence between them breaks as Vincent begins to fuss in Sebastian's arms.

Sam lets out a sigh. "We should probably go home. He's probably getting hungry and he should go down for his afternoon nap soon."

Standing, Sam reaches for Vincent, taking him from Seb and settling him into his stroller. They walk towards the incline that would lead them towards Sam's home.

As they walk, Sam knocks his shoulder against Seb's. "Thanks, by the way. For helping out with Vinny. I really appreciate it."

Seb waves a hand towards him dismissively. "Don't mention it, man. I'm here for you."

Sam's chest tightens, not sure if words would express his gratitude. "I mean it! You're my best friend, I really appreciate you. I love ya, dude."

Chapter Text

Sam groans, rubbing a hand over his face.

Reaching over his guitar on his lap, he scratches out another line on the paper of the notebook sitting in front of him.

He leans back against his bed from where he sits on the floor and stares blankly at the wall in front of him. He had been working on this new song for a couple days but the lyrics weren’t vibing with the tune he had already worked out.

Sam drops his head back against his mattress, closing his eyes and taking a deep breath. He had hoped to have the lyrics down by now so that he could show Abigail and Sebastian during their band practice tomorrow.

It still stunned him sometimes that he had managed to convince his best friends to join a band with him a few years ago. Abigail had been relatively easy to talk into joining. She was often taping on things — her thighs, the pool table, Sam's arm or shoulder — so her playing the drums seemed like a good fit. Plus, hitting the drums also helped her to get out some of her stress and tension she had with her parents from time to time.

Sebastian had been much more difficult to talk into joining. Sam thought he would be perfect for keyboard since he had played it in music class in high school and had liked it. But Seb's social anxiety had been a big factor in him refusing to join at first. Thankfully, between Sam and Abigail, as well as Robin who thought it would be good for Seb to get out of the house, he had agreed to join. And Seb really didn't have to worry about his anxiety. They had only booked a couple small, local gigs in the last 3 years.

Using his feet to kick the notebook toward his hand so he didn’t have to move, he lifts the book and reads the lines for the hundredth time. He hums the melody as he rereads the lyrics on the page.

Oh! Wait!

He sits up and places the guitar on the floor beside him. If I change this word and this one… He grabs the pencil beside him and begins crossing out a word here and there, switching them to others that he hopes will fit with the melody better but keep the meaning the same.

He’s about halfway down the page when his phone rings, making him jump. He glances at his phone and—

Huh. Weird. Why’s Robin calling me?

Sam swipes his thumb across the screen and puts it to his ear. “Hey, Robin!”

“Hi, Sammy. Is Sebastian with you?”

Sam immediately sits up straighter at Robin’s tone. Her voice is level, calm. But he's known her since he was little. He could hear the subtle anxiousness that she tried to mask with her usual cheery tone.

“No, he's not with me.” Sam quickly moves the phone away from his ear to check the time. 10:45am. Seb should have started working by now. “What's wrong?”

There's a pause on the other end of the phone. “It's probably nothing, I'm probably overreacting.” Her mask slips a little, voice cracking the tiniest bit as she speaks. “It's just—" small pause, quiet breath. "He went for a drive last night but he's still not back. At first I thought maybe he had gone to the beach because it's raining but his motorcycle’s not in the garage.”

Chills run down Sam's spine at her words, heart beginning to race. Fuck. Where would he be? It wasn't like Sebastian to stay out like this. Sure, he loved to go for late night rides, but to be gone all night was unlike him.

Sam's brain immediately began running over a list of places Sebastian would normally be. His bedroom, working on his motorcycle outside the garage, at the pond near his home, the end of the pier at the beach, outside Sam's house beside the river.

He nearly gasped when realization hit him.

He let out a breath he hadn't realised he was holding. “I think I know where he might be. I'm going to need to borrow your truck, if that's okay.”

He quickly grabs his backpack and threw some water bottles and maple bars in it. If Seb has been gone all night, he hasn't eaten anything. With a quick goodbye to his mom telling her he would be back later, he was out the door, up at the mountain home in record time.

Thankfully the rain had stopped by the time he reached middle of the town square, sun starting to peak through the clouds. Robin met him outside, truck already pulled out of the garage and running for him.

She pulls him into a tight hug as he reached the home, trying but unable to maintain a mask to hide the worry on her face, eyes shining with tears. “Thank you, Sammy.”

He rubs her back as he returns the embrace. “Of course! He's fine, probably just lost track of time.” He says, keeping his tone soft and light, hoping to reassure her.

Within a few minutes, Sam drove the truck through the narrow road leading from Pelican Town to the main road through the mountains. As he turns onto the main road that would lead to Zuzu City, he's surprised at the lack of traffic before remembering that it was Friday. He made just one stop at a coffee shop at a neighbouring town on his way.

He normally loves this drive. Blaring his favourite music while enjoying the sights of shimmering forests, lively farms, and sparkling lakes. This time of year, autumn, was one of his favourites. He, of course, preferred summer but the crisp air coming through the open window blowing through his hair, the hues of oranges, reds, and yellows of the leaves, he loved it nearly as much. Going through the mountain range between Pelican and Zuzu was breathtaking.

Unfortunately, not even the stunning views of the valley could stop the anxiety bubbling in him. His attention was firmly split between the road and Sebastian.

Stop worrying! He's fine.

Sam breathes out a laugh. Easier said than done.

Seb could be hard to read, especially when he got in his head. He pushed everyone away, even Sam, withdrawing into the most negative spaces of his mind. Sometimes he would stay there for a few days, a week, a couple weeks.

It always worried Sam when he got like this. Sebastian had confided in him a few times about the things his mind would tell him but he knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that what he was told was only surface level.

Sebastian had tried to explain it to him before. It wasn't just negative thoughts and feeling sad. It was the loss of everything he enjoyed. Movies, video games, comics, Solarian Chronicles, nothing held his interest, nothing made him happy. It was like all the colour had been sucked out of the world, leaving everything around him dull and muted.

He would forget to eat for a couple days unless someone reminded him, mostly living off coffee and cigarettes. He was always tired but could barely sleep, which was even more concerning given the fact that he didn't have the greatest sleep patterns to begin with.

There was an anxious buzzing filling his chest as Sam slowed the truck as he apporached the lookout, turning into the small parking area and parking beside the only other vehicle, Sebastian's blue motorcycle. He slumped a little in this seat as he looked at Seb's bike, mentally bracing for what he would find once he got to the clearing.

He lets out a calming breath as he gets out of the truck, grabbing the coffee and slinging his backpack over one of his shoulders, and makes his way down the small path through the trees. He pauses just as the trees clear, noting sebastian sitting cross-legged on top of a picnic table, a cloud of smoke rising to the sky.

Sam keeps his footfalls heavy, scuffing against the dirt under his feet, to not startle him. He doesn't say a word as he sits beside Seb on the picnic table. He quickly glances at him, taking in Sebastian's carefully blank expression, eyes unfocused as they stare at Zuzu City on the horizon.

He follows Seb's gaze past the wooden fence at the cliff towards the city in the distance. They sit in quiet for a while, taking in the view before them of the autumn colours, birds flying free, busy highway in the distance.

"How did you find me?" Sebastian doesn't look at him, eyes now focused but still staring ahead as he takes another drag of his cigarette.

"Your mom called me wondering where you were. She was kinda freaked out since you've apparently been gone since yesterday and never came home. You've talked about this place before, so I kinda guessed you'd be here."

Sebastian finally turns towards Sam, expression unreadable, and lets out a small hum in response.

Sam takes a small glance at him before he turns back towards the horizon, nodding once. "I get why you come here. It's really pretty."

"I come here when I want to get away from everything and just… think," Sebastian says. "It's peaceful and calming up here."

They sit in silence for another moment before Sam blows out a breath through his nose, reaching his hand holding the cup of coffee out for Sebastian.

"Want to talk about it?"

There's a short pause before Sebastian takes the cup. "It's stupid. I don't know why my brain gets like this."

His eyes flick towards Sam sheepishly, "thanks for the coffee."

The corner of Sam's mouth tugs upwards as he removes his backpack and begins to open it. "I got more than that."

He takes out two maple bars, handing one to Seb before unwrapping his own and taking a bite of it. He watches Seb pointedly until he does the same.

Satisfied that he at least took a bite of the bar, Sam says, "something got you to come up here yesterday and didn't let you go back. Try me."

Stalling his answer, Sebastian takes another bite of his bar, chewing slowly. At first Sam thinks that he is just finding his words to explain what was going on. Then Seb takes a few gulps of his coffee, pausing between each sip to swirl the liquid in the cup a few times. Sam watches, head tilting slightly as one of his eyebrows raise. Then Sebastian lifts his cigarette to his lips, taking a few pulls and blowing the smoke upwards.

"Seriously?" Sam pouts.

Sam has to restrain from smacking him as Sebastian gives him a smirk. This is supposed to be a serious conversation. Instead he settles for an unimpressed glare, holding it until Seb let out a long sigh.

The air around the turns sombre as Seb looks back towards the horizon, worrying his bottom lip for a moment. "Maru graduated from her nursing program a year early. She's going to be working with Doctor Harvey, starting in a couple weeks. And her and Penny announced they've been dating for a few months."

Sam turns his head away from the view back towards Seb, keeping his expression neutral, silently willing him to continue.

Sebastian gives a small smile that doesn't quite reach his eyes as he looks down at his feet. "See. I told you it was stupid. And bitter. And pathetic. And, of course, mom and Demtrius are absolutely thrilled about having one kid that isn't a complete fuck up failure"

He pauses long enough to take another drag of his cigarette. "You would think that I would be over this. I'm fucking twenty two and crying because of my half-sister. Like, what is wrong with me that I can't be happy for her? Why do I still compare myself to her? Fuck, I'm so pathetic." Seb brings his hands up to his face, pressing his palms into his eyes, barely avoiding his hair with his lit cigarette.

"Ok, but what about you?" Sam asks, lightly tapping his shoulder against Seb's. "You just finished that emergency contract for that big grocery store in Zuzu. You had the checkout button thing working again in a few hours. And I remember you saying how much of a pain in the ass fixing that code was. And I was there when you got the email back from them, they were super impressed with you and would love to work with you again!"

"And they were never heard from again," Seb monotones. "That was over a month ago, Sam. Haven't heard from them since. And they would have more programming stuff then just a button on their website. Besides, one contract ins't graduating university a year early and getting a job almost immediately. And you know mom and Demetrius never gave a shit about my work."

Sebastian takes a final drag of his cigarette before snuffing it out and dropping the butt into the small metal portable ashtray he kept in the pouch of his hoodie. He drops his legs onto the seat of the picnic table and leans forward to cross his arms on his legs. With a deep sigh, he presses his forehead against his arms.

"It's always been so hard not to compare myself to Maru," he says, a little muffled. "I don't think I could ever be convinced she can do anything wrong. I mean, when she decided to go into nursing after being interested in engineering her whole life, it took Demetrius two days before he was fully on board. I've been interested in programming since I can remember and he still thinks I'm just playing on a fucking compter all day."

Sam leans back on his arms as he listens to Sebastian. Seb isn't telling him anything new. He's ranted frustatingly about Demetrius' refusal to even consider what Sebastian does for his career as something valid since he was old enough to use a computer.

Sebastian had even taken his silly advice back then and asked Demetrius if he would like to sit with him to see what he was working on. Apparently, Demetrius had laughed — actually laughed in Seb's face — before simply telling him no and walking to his lab. Sebastian had been absolutely crushed and it had taken Sam a couple weeks to get him to do anything other than go to school and mindlessly play video games.

"I think it's pretty impressive, though," Sam said, looking thoughtfully at the back of Seb's head, forehead still pressed against his arms on this thighs. "You managed to make a career out of something you were interested in when you were a kid. Even Maru isn't doing that. I still can't figure out why she didn't go into engineering."

"Don't know, don't care." Seb let's out another deep sigh. "At least she's doing stuff with her life. I'm just living in my mom's fucking basement, playing on the computer all day. My career is basically at a stand still, I haven't been able to get much done on that game I've been working on. I haven't been in any relationships because I live in the middle of fucking nowhere."

Sam starts to open his mouth, inhaling a breath to speak, but then quickly shuts it. He probably really shouldn't remind him of his brief relationship with Abigail in high school. Not that it had ended badly, they were closer now than they were back then, but because they didn't get together for the right reasons. Everyone had kept trying to push them together until they caved and decided to give it a try. It lasted all of two months and ended when they both realized they were gay.

"My social life is basically non-existent." Seb continues, lifting his head from his lap and gives him a small smile. "No offense."

Sam smiles back at him with a huffed laugh. "None taken. But you know this is temporary. Your work contracts always seem to slow down right before they pick up again. And you've been saving to move. And it only feels like your social life sucks because we live in a small town and there's not a lot going on."

Sam shifts his voice into a soft, teasing tone, praying that he ins't about to stick his foot in his mouth. "Plus your an introvert and don't leave the house much."

He holds his breath waiting for Sebastian to respond. It was always a toss up how Seb would react to teasing, especially during times like these. It could either make things much more worse or, as it was a bit more often than not, the teasing would lift the mood a little. Abigail had once pointed out that it only ever worked when Sam did it. Sam had consciously refused to unpack that information, putting it into a box in his head instead and only using the it as needed.

Sam's heart drops as Sebastian rolls his eyes then levels a glare at him. But, as he looks away, Sam catches as the corners of his mouth twitch up in a small smile. "Not helping, Sam."

Sam starts to open his mouth again, closing it when he decides it probably definitely wouldn't help to remind Seb that he can't compare himself to everyone else, that there's no prize for adulting. He had a similar conversation with Penny when she had confided in him about feeling behind in life, still living at home with her mom, wanting to go to school to be a teacher but not having the funds to do it. Hell, even Sam felt a little trapped with his current situation of working at Joja, taking care of his little brother, still living at home.

"And it's not just Maru," Sebastian was saying when Sam snapped out of his thoughts. "Abs started dating that new farmer and she joined that weird Adventurers Guild and she's finishing up her degree in geology. Alex just started playing for the Zuzu City gridball team. And Leah has been pretty successful at selling her art since I finished her website."

Sebastian pauses again to light another cigarette, taking a long drag as he pulls his legs up to his chest. He speaks next in a grim tone that sends a shiver down Sam's spine, "I just feel like everyone else are living their lives and I'm just standing still, useless as ever. It just feels like… if I just disappeared would it really matter?"

Sam silently watches him as he takes another pull, smoke pluming above them. His heart twisted sharply at Seb's last words. The rest of what Seb had said he's heard before. Not necessarily those exact words but comparing himself to others. But his last words, about him disappearing, that was new. That was insight into his mind that he never let people see.

Sam has to brace himself, hands curling around the edge of the table, to stop himself from lunging over, pulling Seb into his arms, and holding him until he knew that he was cared for, knew that he was loved, knew that he mattered. He had to swallow down the urge to lean in and kiss him, to show him that he was loved, show him he was cared for, show him that he mattered.

Of course, it would be a wildly inappropriate reaction right now. He'd be taking advantage of Sebastian's vulnerability.

Instead, he swallowed thickly. "It would matter to me," he said quietly.

"What?"

"If you just disappeared one day. It would matter to me." Sam looked at him, eyes flicking between Seb's, trying to convey everything in his expression that he was too afraid to say out loud.

"Really?" Seb's voice was small when he responded, almost like he was genuinely surprised.

Turning his body a little so he's more angled toward Sebastian, he places a hand on Seb's arm.

"Yeah, really. Seb, you're my best friend. I've known you since we were six. You know me best out of everyone. You're, like, my person. You're fun, and smart, and caring, and kind. You always create the most fun Solarion Chronicles scenarios. You never get bored of kicking my ass at some video game or at pool. But even when we're not doing stuff, even when we're just hanging at the lake by your house, I love just sitting with you. I don't know what I'd do if you just disappeared. You're important to me, Seb. I just— I just wish I could convince your brain that you don't need to be anything more, that you're enough."

For a moment, neither say anything. Seb's eyes, now appearing a little more shiny than before, flick over his face, like he was searching for something, like he was trying to detect the smallest ounce that Sam was anything but truthful. Sam, in return, held his gaze, keeping his expression as open and honest as he could.

When Seb's eyes flick down to his lips, bitting on his own, Sam thinks his heart might stop beating. His breath hitching in his throat as Seb seems to lean in a fraction of a centimeter.

Then Sebastian clears his throat, bringing a hand up to rub his eyes as he looks back out towards Zuzu City on the horizon. And Sam follows suit, letting out the air in his lungs that he has been holding. He can feel electricity zapping through his veins, making him shiver a little.

"Thanks, Sam." Seb said quietly.

A silence envelopes them. Sam allows himself to lean his shoulder against Seb's, hoping the touch was supportive, comforting. He tries to calm his rapidly beating heart, mentally berating himself for thinking the moment was anything other a comforting one. He had to bite his cheek when Seb leans back against him, letting his head fall on Sam's shoulder.

A few minutes pass before a thought pops in his head as he gazes at Zuzu City ahead of them.

Giving a small nod towards the horizon, he asks, "I know you've been wanting to move to Zuzu for a few years. Have you started to think seriously about it?"

Seb shrugs his shoulder. "I mean, kinda. I've looked online at areas and apartments and stuff. I need to have a plan, need to know what I have to save to get out of here."

Sam's chest tightens at Seb's confirmation about wanting to leave, not that he's really shocked by it. Sebastian had talked on and off about moving to the city for years. He wants to see his friend be happy, of course he does, even if that's in another place, but… he can't help the selfish thought about being left behind. Zuzu city isn't far, only a few hours away, but he wouldn't be able to spontaneously take the walk up the mountain whenever he wanted to see Seb. Or just plan a random meet up somewhere in the village.

"How do you even know you'll like it there?"

Sebastian barks out a laugh. "I guess that's the question, isn't it." Seb moves his head off Sam's shoulder to take another drag from his cigarette. "Is Zuzu better than Pelican? It's gotta be, right? I feel like I'm suffocating in mom's basement, like the walls are slowly closing in and if I don't do something soon they'll crush me."

Sam nods then puts on his best grin, keeping his tone light and cheerful. "What area were you thinking? I don't really know the neighborhoods that well, mostly just what's around the bus stop."

"The neighborhood that I would love to go is called Robin Square."

Sam huffs a laugh. "Cute name. I don't think I know it."

Seb smiles at him. "It's on the other side of the city. Lots of shops and restaurants and bars. I actually got my frog playing a guitar tattoo—" Seb pats his left forearm, "at a studio there. They have a really nice park, too. There's lots of trees along the streets. It doesn't really feel like a city. I mean, it doesn't feel like Pelican Town, either, but ya know…" Seb laughs.

Sam stays quiet for a moment. He wants to be happy for Sebastian, he really does, he really tries. His own thoughts of being left behind shoving their way to the front of his mind.

He didn't mean for the words to come out the way they did. They just tumbled out of his mouth without his permission, more bitter in tone than he would have ever allowed. "Sounds nice."

His eyes stay fixed on the horizon as Seb's head swirls in his direction.

"You could come too." Sebastian's voice is soft, with a hint of something Sam can't quite place.

Sam forces his lips to curl upwards as he meets Seb's gaze. "Nah, that's your thing. Besides, who would look after mom and Vincent while dad's gone? Who would mop the floors at Joja?"

"You don't have to do that forever, Sam. You know you would love living in Zuzu. And I think you would really like this neighbourhood."

Sam bites his lip, head tilting toward the ground but watching Seb from the corner of his eye. "Alright, show me."

Seb laughs again. "You want to go to Zuzu? Like, now?"

"Why not?" Sam shrugs. "You're making it sound really good. Got more emo shit to do this afternoon?" Sam almost immediately winces when the words fall out of his mouth.

Oh my fucking Yoba, you idiot! You did not just say that right now.

Sebastian bursts out in laughter in response to his insensitive slip. Once he settles down, he flashes a genuine smile at Sam, shaking his head a little. "No, nothing planned for the afternoon. Maybe later tonight, though. I'll let you know."

Sam rolls his eyes before jumping off the picnic table, holding a hand out to him. "Let's go. We're taking your motorcycle."

Sebastian opens his mouth to protest but Sam raises his hand to cut him off. "I have the spare helmet." Sam's eyebrows pull together and he moves his outstretched hand to rub the back of his neck. "Actually, Robin had it in the truck when I got to your place earlier. I never even questioned it. Huh. Well, that's convenient." Sam shrugs his shoulders.

He reaches his hand out again, "Coming?"

Seb's gaze drops to his hand, lips twisting to the side for a brief moment, before letting out a deep sigh and taking Sam's hand. It's a short walk back to the parking lot, and a couple minutes for Sam to grab the helmet and shoot Robin a text to let her know what was going on, and they are off to the city.

Sam absolutly loves riding with Sebastian on his motorcycle. He loves the thrill and excitement, the feeling of flying as they swerve down the winding road along the mountain. He loves the rush he gets as the wind whips at his clothes and hair. He loves watching as their surroundings zoom past, mixing into a blur of greens, browns, blues, oranges.

Most of all — and if he was honest as to his suggestion — he loves that he can momentarily drop some of his control, allowing himself to relax against Sebastian. The intimate feeling of being close to him, chest pressed against his back, arms wrapped tightly around his waist. He can close his eyes and pretend this was normal, that this was his, even if only for a moment.

The men settle into a comfortable, mostly silent drive, only having the low, quiet of Sebastian's playlist in their ears from the Bluetooth speakers in their helmets. Sam would occassionally point out a cool looking tree, some cows in a field, a dog in a passing car, but Sebastian for the most part stayed quiet, only letting out a hum of a response.

As they got close to Zuzu, Sebastian hopped from the winding country road to the highway. Sam watched as they circled past the outter neighbourhoods of the city. He could probably count on his hands how many times he had been out this way, past where the town bus would bring them into the city.

Once they entered the city, Sam, as always, was absolutely entranced by the builings and people and noise. He only had small memories of Zuzu from when he lived here as a child and nothing outside the small area around his apartment and the bus stop was recognizable.

His attention shifted as Sebastian navigated the maze of streets, watching as shops and parks and people slowly passed. He couldn't help excitedly pointing out all of the dogs and the occassional cat they saw.

"Did you see that one?" he would point out, not that Sebastian could turn to see it since he was concentrating on the road and other vehicles. "They had four cats on leashes!"

Eventually, Sebastian came to the neighbourhood called Robin Square. To Sam, it looks exactly the same as every other neighbourhood that they had driven through, if not a little more quiet. The main streets of the area seemed to be quite busy, lined with restaurants and stores; while the streets off the main ones were much more quiet, lined with trees.

Sebastian easily finds and parks his motorcycle in a parking garage. They both dismount, stuffing their helmets into a rentable locker, and walk onto a relatively busy street. Sam lets Sebastian lead him, seeming to already be comfortable with the neighbourhood.

Within minutes, Sebastian is already pointing out stores and shops.

"That's the tattoo shop I was telling you about. Highly recommend them, especially Keith for tattoos and Lance for piercings. They're all really friendly." Sam looks at the building as he passes. The brick building didn't really standout much, the white lettering of the shop name stood out against the black covering of the window, otherwise bare except for small pride and trans flags in the corner.

Seb continues to point out other places as they walk, a coffee shop that made the best lattes, a bar that made really good burgers; there was a really cool aquarium a couple streets over that had a big section for frogs; there was even a giant toy store in the neighbouhood that had massive keyboard laid out on the floor that you could jump on to play music.

The more they walk, the more excited Sebastian gets, the more something twists inside Sam, clawing at his chest as he desperately tries to maintain his composure. It wouldn't do for Sebastian to think that he wasn't happy, that he was slowly growing to hate everything about this neighbourhood. This neighbourhood that was trying very easily to take his best friend from him.

Yoba fucking shit, I'm jealous of the fucking city.

He nearly berates himself at his thoughts. Sebastian was his own person. Despite his feelings, Sam didn't own him. If he was completely honest, even if, by some miracle, they were together, Sam still wouldn't stop Sebastian from moving to the city if that was what he really wanted.

So, for the rest of the afternoon, Sam puts a big grin on his face. He forces himself to get as excited as Sebastian does as he points out the park a couple blocks in front of them that has a massive fountain in the center and a small man-made lake that Seb was sure would probably have frogs living in it.

After a while, they turn down arguably one of the most busy streets Sam has ever been down. The whole street seemed to be lined with stores and restaurants, jammed with people flitting around each other in what Sam would describe as co-ordinated chaos. They had to walk incredible close to each other, which wreaked havoc on Sam's nerves as the steady contact between them left him tingling with both a desire to grab on and an immense fear of being rejected if he tried.

After the eigth time their hands brushed against each other — no, Sam was not counting — he decides to swallow his trepadation, taking a deep breath and laced his fingers with Seb's.

Seb immediately looks at him, brows furrowed slightly, expression questionning.

Sam shrugs his shoulders. "You keep hitting me. Figured this would be easier."

Sebastian watches him for another few seconds before squeezing his hand and giving him a lopsided smile.

Before Sam realizes it, they had been walking around the neighbourhood for a few hours. His attention had been equally split between the things that Seb had been pointing out and the hand still clasped in his, not having let go since they were first intertwined together.

The neighbourhood is so huge that they manage to find themselves in a large park on the far side of it. There was a small fair set up in it, taking up half of the park. There were a few rides, food stalls, and game booths. They walk around for a while, pausing for a bit to grab some dinner at a stall, before trying their hand at a few games.

Sam had attempted the ring game, which seemed easy enough, but failed each time to get the rings around the pins.

"Oh, come on! Cheer up!" Sebastian says. "All of these games are rigged anyway. Everyone knows that."

It was Sebastian's turn to pout when he tried, and failed, to pop a balloon with a water gun.

"Stupid rigged games," he muttered. Sam couldn't help but laugh, earning a glare from Seb in response.

After they both fail a couple more games, Sam lets his eyes roam over the other stalls until they fall on one towards the end. He grabs Seb's hand, leading him over.

"I'm going to beat this one!" He exclaims, way more confidentely than he probably should.

"This one? The balloon and dart game? This is one of the most common carnival games to be rigged!" Sebastian whispers at him. "You're wasting your money. Let's pick another one."

Sebastian moves to grab his hand to steer him to another game but Sam twists slightly out of his grasp.

Grinning at him, Sam again confidentely exclaims, "Nope, I'm going to beat this one!"

"Ok. It's your money." Seb rolls his eyes, shaking his head a little.

Sam pays the game operator and takes the three darts handed to him. He moves to a spot in front of the balloons attached to a board a few feet away. Taking in a deep breath then releasing it slowly, he takes aim, moving his forearm once, twice, three times befoe throwing the dart forward. It pierces its target with a sharp pop.

He keeps his expression smug as he glances beside him at Sebastian.

"Lucky shot." Sebastian grumbles.

Okay, you got this. Two more.

Sam takes his stance again, deep breath in then slow breath out. He flicks his hand forward once, twice, three times before releasing the dart at a yellow balloon.

POP!

Sam lets out a sharp laugh. "Lucky shot, huh?" He knocks his shoulder against Sebastian's.

"One more, hotshot." Seb says, crossing his arms.

Sam studies the balloons in front of him for a moment, eyes darting around the colours trying to pick the right one. He places his arm on Seb's shoulder, guiding him to change places with him so he is now standing where Seb was, picking a light blue balloon.

He repeats his ritual that he took with the other two balloons. This time, he brings in a deep breath on the third practice flick of his arm, holding it as he flicks the dart at the balloon.

Sam never understood when people said that time stood still. Until now anyway. He watches the dart fly in the air in slow motion, rotating a little as it went. Even Sebastian and the operator and a couple onlookers seemed to have completely frozen in place. Then—

POP!

"Holy shit!" Sam cries at the same time that Sebastian was wrapping an arm around his waist in a side hug, grinning and exlaiming, "Holy fuck, you did it!"

When they brake apart, the operator, to Sam's amusement, didn't look that as enthused as Sam felt.

"Congrats," he mumbles flately. "Here's your prize."

Sam was a little taken aback when the man nearly shoved a box in his hands. In his defese, didn't they usually get to pick a prize? There was a wall of various sizes of stuffed animals and toys but nothing that would have come in a box. Noticing the frown on Sebastian's face, he figures his assumption was correct but wasn't really in the mood to argue with the operator.

"C'mon, Sam," Sebastian said as he wraps his arm around Sam's waist again, steering him a little further down to make room for the people standing behind them to play.

"So, what's in the box?" He asks, nodding towards Sam's hand. "I figured he was going to let you pick one of those stuffed animals. Bet you'd have picked the unicorn one."

"Actually, I was eyeing the black cat one because it reminded me of you." Sam smirked, earning him a light, playful punch to his arm.

Sam opens the box. Inside contains a necklace, a black chain with a light blue pendant.

"This is the weirdest fucking carnival prize I think I've ever seen." Sam says, confused.

Sebastian lifts the pendant to examine it more. "Holy shit dude, this is a frozen tear! I don't know how rare they are but they're not easy to find. You would have to go down to like, level 40 something in the mines to find one there. And I think Pierre sold them before at his Winter Star booth for, like, 2500g."

"2500g?" Sam repeats incredulously. "There's no way this is real then! Who would give this as a prize at a carnival?"

"Dunno, that guy apparently," Sebastian turns to eye the game operator, whose attention was now firmly on letting his current customer know they lost the game.

Turning back to Sam, he checkes the time on his phone. "It's just after seven. We should probably head back to Pelican."

Sam wants to protest, not wanting to end his night now that he was finally having fun. The carnival had taken his mind off his weird jealousy of Zuzu and he was really enjoying his time with Sebastian.

Not willing to explain why he didn't want to leave yet, and not able to come up with a better excuse right then, Sam agrees to go back.

The ride back to Pelican is cool and dark. They stop briefly at the lookout, just long enough for Sam to mournfully release his hold on Sebastian and get into Robin's truck.

As they pull into the driveway, Sam slows as Sebastian drives his motorcycle into the attached garage and parks the truck in front of it. He takes his time gathering his bag, waiting until Seb walks out of the garage before getting out of the truck.

He takes a step forward towards Sebastian and trips on a loose rock. Not able to catch himself, he puts his arms out to brace for impact, waiting for the ground to meet him. Then —

Nothing.

Sam blinks, heart racing. It takes his brain a couple seconds to register that he's not falling. Another couple seconds to register arms wrapped around him and his head pressed into a chest.

"You okay?" Seb asks.

"Fuck, thanks. I think I tripped on a rock."

It takes him a moment to find his feet and right himself, Sebastian still holding him to keep him steady. Once he's on his feet, he looks at Sebastian and his brain short circuits.

Time freezes for the second time that night as they gaze at each other, faces only a couple inches apart. Electricity shoots down his spine, along his arms and legs, raising the hair on his body as they stare at each other.

Sam's eyes flick around Sebastian's face and down to his lips, watching as Seb licks then sucks in his bottom lip, catching it between his teeth. When he pulls his eyes back up to Seb's, his breath hitches as Seb's eyes flicks down to his own lips.

He's not sure who leans in first, painfully slow, covering the distance between them centimeter by centimeter. His heart beats loudly in his ears as anticipation builds inside. Sam parts his lips slightly, eyes beginning to flutter shut, then—

Working nine to five, what a way to make a livin'

Barely gettin' by, it's like takin' and no givin'

The bubble bursts around them in an instant. The men spring apart like someone had dumped a bucket of ice water over them, jumping away until there's several feet between them. They stare at each other for an eternity — really, a couple seconds — before it's broken by Sebastian looking down at the ground.

Sam fishes in his pocket, pulling out his phone, wishing all kinds of evil to the person who just broke the moment between them.

With a sigh, he swipes his phone. "Hey mom, what's up?"

The conversation lasts only a couple minutes before Sam hangs up.

The tension around Sam is so palpable, he knows if he reached out he's be able to touch it. He watches Sebastian, whose gaze is still firmly planted at his feet, for a moment before letting out a sigh.

"Well, I got to go. Mom wants me back home. I— umm… have a good night, Seb." He gives a small wave, noting that Sebastian had finally looked back up at him with an unreadable expression.

He takes a few steps towards the path to bring him down the mountain before he pauses.

"Actually, hold on a sec." He shrugs his bag from his shoulder, opening it and pulling out the box with the tear drop shaped necklace inside.

He vehemently ignores the burning in his cheeks as he moves back to Sebastian, praying to Yoba that it's too dark out for him to notice how red his face must be.

He holds the box out for him to take. "You love frozen tears. You take it."

Sebastian crosses his arms as he stares at the box. "You're the one who won it. You should keep it."

"I want you to keep it," Sam says quietly, taking a small step forward.

Sebastian lets out a breath. "Okay. Thank you, Sam." Sebastian takes the box carefully in his hands. He lifts his gaze back up, eyes flicking back and forth between Sam's. "And thank you… for earlier. I've been in my head and— just… I really appreciate it."

"Of course, Sebby," Sam replies, using Seb's childhood nickname, "you're my best friend and I love you. I'll always be here whenever you need to be shaken out of your head."

Seb huffs out a laugh, rolling his eyes. "Thanks, dork. Go home."

Knocking his shoulder into Seb's before turning back towards the path, Sam looks over his shoulder, "night, Seb."

Chapter Text

Sebastian couldn't help the bittersweet feeling that tightened in his chest as he looked around his room.

It had been his room since he was five. He shared a bedroom on the main level of the home with his half-sister Maru when they first moved here to Pelican Town when he was three and Maru was about seven months old. His mother had built the house herself over a couple years and hadn't accounted for an extra person, so she had only built two bedrooms.

Sebastian had absolutely hated the arrangement from the very beginning. Why did he have to get stuck having to share a bedroom with Maru? Sebastian hadn't wanted a new sibling. He didn't want to move to Pelican Town. He wanted to stay in Grampleton in his apartment and be with his friends and his granny and grampy.

Now, if Sebastian was being honest, Maru wasn't a bad baby. She hadn't fused very often and she was mostly sleeping through the night. But Sebastian had missed being able to do whatever he wanted in his room. Maru took so many naps that he wasn't allowed to play in his room and wasn't allowed to go into the room to get a new toy when Maru was there.

On Sebastian's fifth birthday, his mom had decided he was big enough for his own room. There was a large room in the basement that was mostly used for storage that she cleared out to make room for him.

Sebastian had been thrilled. He was allowed to paint the room whatever colour he wanted and decorate the walls with his drawings and posters of superheroes and frogs. He even added a few of his friend Abigail's drawings to his wall, too. His furniture and toys didn't take too much space in the big room, so his mom gave him the old couch they had in storage.

It had taken him a while to get used to being in the basement. There was no window in his room, so it was very dark even with the frog nightlight washing the room in a soft green glow. The house creaked and groaned as it settled for the night but to a five year old, he was convinced it was someone walking around.

A few days after his first night in his new room, he had invited Abigail to have a sleepover. They had stayed up much later than they were allowed to, Abby telling ghost stories that she had heard from her uncle. She had Sebastian convinced that his house was haunted and he had refused to sleep alone in his room for a few days after. His mother had to sleep in his room with him to reassure him the house wasn't haunted. He didn't let Abby sleep over for a while after that.

A smile pulls at Sebastian's lips at the memory. Fucking Abby. Such a little shit, even at that age. He chuckles to himself at the thought.

Sebastian's gaze roams over the room, images of the past ghosting in front of his eyes.

There was a burn mark on the floor still from the time that Maru had tried to show him some experiment she was working on that had caught fire. He's pretty sure the blanket they used to put out the small flames was still hidden in his closet, scorch marks and all.

The first time Sam had slept over, they had pushed the couch close to the bed and had made a giant blanket fort. His mom had helped push his tv over and set up his Super Nintendo so they could play games all night. They even got to eat their pizza in the fort.

Sebastian can't help but cringe as his gaze shifts towards his bedroom door, images of his first kiss with Abby appearing in front of his eyes. They were both so nervous and it was so awkward. Thankfully they had both realized they were gay pretty soon after and had become even closer, apart, than ever before.

There was still orange stains on one of the cushions on the couch from the time he worked on a group protect for school with Haley, Sam, and Penny. Sam had brought Cheetos for a snack for everyone and Haley had decided the old, worn out couch would be a perfect napkin to wipe the Cheeto dust off her fingers.

The room held whispers of hysterical laughter from when Abby had sprayed pop from her nose at one of Sam's jokes; incredulous cries from Penny when her character died the one, and only, time they had invited her to play Solarian Chronicles with them; quiet sobs from comforting Alex the time he needed to talk, trusting Sebastian enough by then to come out to him.

His eyes eventually land on the pile of empty boxes sitting in the corner of the room, waiting to be filled with all his possessions. He was waiting for Sam to help him pack but maybe he could get started now.

As he starts to walk over to the boxes, the bell on the main door to the house rings. His heart beat picks up the smallest bit as he listens as the person makes there way across the entrance room that his mother used for her carpentry shop before turning the corner towards the stairs to the basement. He picks up a box, ready to gently fling it at Sam when he enters the room.

The more he listens, however, the more his heart deflates, almost immediately recognizing his sister's footsteps on the stairs before she even gets to his open doorway.

Not that he wasn't happy to see his sister. He and Maru had worked hard at reconciling their relationship. They had grown close over the last couple years and Sebastian genuinely enjoyed spending time with her. It's just that, well, she wasn't Sam.

Maru raises an eyebrow when she turns into the bedroom, eyes flicking up to the box Seb was still holding above his head.

"Hey, Maru," he says as he drops the box at his feet. "I figured it would be Sam." He smirks at her.

She rolls her eyes. "Hey to you, too. Were you planning on pelting your only helper with a box when he came in the room?"

"Of course not!" Sebastian presses a hand over his heart, feigning innocence. "In what world would I do that? No, I was just going to throw the box at his head and see how good his reflexes were."

"Uh huh." Her eyes shift around the room. A high-pitched shriek comes from the carrier on her front and she turns a little to the side. "Okay, okay. Do you see Uncle Seb now?"

"Hello, my princess!" Sebastian coos as he closes the distance between them, leaning down, eyes focused only on his niece.

One of the biggest things Sebastian was going to miss about moving to Zuzu City was his new niece. The last few years had been amazing for Maru and Penny. They were now living together in a small home that Robin had built for them in Cindersap Forest, not far from Leah and Marnie's homes. Penny was still teaching Vincent and Jas while slowly working on getting her teaching degree. A few months after they moved into their home, they had announced that Penny was pregnant. She had given birth to their daughter, Everly, almost three months ago.

He holds his arms out, making grabby hands towards the baby. "Give."

Maru rolls her eyes, grinning as she unclasps the baby carrier so Sebastian can take his niece. She squeals as soon as she's in his arms, immediately beginning to coo at him, telling him a story.

"Oh, yes, I see." He responds to her. "And then what happened?" He asks before Everly continues her story.

Maru watches them, soft smile on her face. "Ya know, if someone had told me a couple of years ago that you would be absolutely smitten and cooing at a baby, I would have called them a fucking liar."

"Hey! I used to do this with Vincent too!" His tone softens, "besides, if someone had told me a lot of things would change over that last couple years, I would have also called them a fucking liar."

After his bout of depression a few years ago, he decided to finally do something about it. He knew it wouldn't go away on it's own and he definitely wasn't coping very well. He had started therapy and, luckily, it had only taken a few tries to get his amazing therapist.

She had helped him with his complicated emotions and given him tools and healthier coping mechanisms. The medication he took helped. It wasn't perfect, he still had bad days, but it was so much better than without them. He even managed to completely quit smoking a year ago, although he still itched for a cigarette every now and then, especially in times like today.

His various relationships even got better. It took a lot of hard work but he had been able to mend things with Maru and his mom and they were now closer than ever. He still clashed from time to time with Demetrius but they had been able to develop a cordial understanding of each other.

Things in his life had brightened.

Maru watches them for a moment before walking a little around the room, taking it in.

"Well, you got a lot done in here. The moving truck will be here in a few hours, right? What on earth are you and Sam going to do with all your free time?" Maru asks, sarcasm dripping from her words.

Sebastian lets out a low groan. He had planned to get a lot of packing done before today but he had been working late the last couple of days trying to get a work contract done before he started the first real time off he had taken since he started his freelance career. As luck would have it, the coding had been a nightmare to make work and what should have taken him a day or two had taken a week.

He glances down at a small pile of stacked boxes beside him. "I got lots packed! See!"

Maru's gaze follows his finger as he points to the three tapped up boxes before sweeping her own arm around the room. "Wow. Good job with the packing!" She huffs out a laugh.

Sebastian playfully gives her a little shove with his elbow, keeping a hand protectively on the back of Ever's head to prevent any jostling. "Some of us had to work, not just relaxing on maternity leave."

He carefully dodges the swat to his arm Maru had aimed at him. "I'm joking! I'm joking! How's Penny, by the way?" Sebastian asks, trying to change the subject from his lack of packing.

Maru smiles fondly. "Good! Exhausted but good. I wanted to give her a little time to relax today, and since I had to come see you before you left I figured I'd bring Ever."

"Makes sense. And I'd probably have kicked you out if you hadn't brought my little angel."

Maru scrunches her nose, making a face at him in response.

"How are things going with the baby?" Seb asks, sing-songing towards his niece who stares at him with wide eyes.

"We're good, I think. She's sleeping a little longer now, thank Yoba."

Sebastian snorted. "Well that's good. You really do need your beauty sleep."

"Shut up! I do not!" Maru successfully smacks his arm. "She's holding her head up more and for longer increments of time during tummy time. And her absolute best friend, besides you of course, is the ceiling fan in the living room. She'll smile and coo at that thing for hours if we let her."

Sebastian smiles as he lets out a small huff of laughter through his nose, the baby still making cooing noises and squeals at them while gripping Seb's shirt with impressive strength.

"So this is it, huh? You're really moving to Zuzu City?" Maru asks, eyes jumping around the room.

"Yeah, I guess." Seb shakes head disbelieving. "It seems crazy, right? I never thought I'd actually do it."

"I did." The corners of Maru's mouth tug upwards. "I just didn't think you'd do it alone."

Sebastian lets out a sigh. This again? "Maru…"

"You know you want to ask him. Both of you have been dancing around each other for years. One of you has to be brave," Maru says softly.

"Maru, we've talked about this. I can't risk it. I won't risk it. Sam is too important to me."

Maru levels a knowing smile at him. "That's what I said about Penny." Ever waves a hand towards Maru and Maru let's her grab her finger. "Yes, your mommy! That is how I felt about her " Maru coos.

Turning back to Sebastian, she continues, "and look what being brave got me. An amazing partner, an amazing home, and an amazing daughter."

Sebastian lets out a long sigh in response, gnawing on his bottom lip as his arms tightened slightly around his niece.

"You need to tell him, Seb. Today. Before you go." She says gently.

His stomach twists at the thought. "What if it ruins everything?" He whispers. He wasn't a superstitious person, but he sure as hell wasn't going to speak the words into the world any louder.

"Well, you'll only be a few hours away and can come cry on my couch."

Seb tilts his head slightly, shooting her with a glare. "Hilarious. That's really helpful."

"Thanks, I thought so." She sighs. "No but seriously, I really don't think it will ruin anything. I haven't talked to Sam much, not like Penny — and no, Sam has never admitted or said anything to her about you, not in that way — but… Seb, the answer will always be a no if you never ask the question."

Just as Sebastian opens his mouth to respond, the bell on the main door upstairs rings.

Maru looks up towards the ceiling then pulls him into a hug the best she can with her baby in his arms. "You got this. Be brave."

She pulls back as Sam comes jumping down the stairs.

"Alright the help has arrived!" Sam yells, jumping the last few steps and making Ever startle a little in Seb's arms and she lets out a small shriek. "Oh fuck— shi— I'm sorry, Ever," Sam murmurs. His attention swings to Maru. "Hey! I didn't know you were here too."

"Hey, Sam!" Maru says. "We're just here for a quick visit to get out of the house."

"Give Penny a break, huh?" Sam says as he walks over to Sebastian, arms out expectantly.

Sebastian tightens his hold on his niece, twisting a little to the side, away from Sam. "Nope, she's mine! Get your own!"

"Well, can't do that by myself and I don't think you'd be very helpful, so…" Sebastian very pointedly ignores Maru's amused expression and raised eyebrows at that sentence. "Can I please hold her? I haven't seen her in, like, a week when Penny came by Joja."

Seb let's out a deep sigh but gently passes Ever to Sam.

"Hi sweetie!" He says softly as Ever starts up her own babbling. "Yeah, I know! Uncle Seb is moving far away! And he clearly got a lot of packing done before today, huh?"

"Oh my Yoba!" Seb throws his hands up in the air, defeated. "You know I was worki—"

"I'm teasing!" Sam laughs. "I know, you were working on that contract. Did you get it done?"

"Yeah, I finished it last night." His eyes roam around the room, taking in what was left to be packed. Which was, basically, literally everything.

He pulled his phone out of his pocket to check the time. "Shit. And we only have a little less than three hours before the moving truck gets here."

Maru steps up to Sebastian, wrapping her arms around him in a hug. "Please talk to him." She whispers in his ear, giving him a pleading look as she pulls away. Louder, she says to Ever, "alright, I think that's our cue." Sam carefully passes Ever over to Maru so she can strap her back in to the chest carrier.

Sebastian presses a small peck to the top of Ever's head. "You're still coming down next week, right?"

"Of course we are! We want to see the condo once you're settled a little," Maru confirms. She walks towards the door, pausing briefly. "Call me later, Seb, once you get there. Bye Sam."

Sam gives a small wave. "Bye Maru, bye Ever!"

Turning back towards Sebastian, Sam claps his hands once. "Alright! We should probably get started. What's the plan? Are we just throwing things in boxes or did you want to go through things first? Have you already gone through things?"

"I've gone through some of it. Honestly, I think I'm just going to throw everything into the boxes then deal with it later, unless I find things I really don't want to keep or need to donate or something."

Sam leans over, picking up a box, and looks around the room. "Okay. Why don't I start… with the bookshelf?"

Sebastian nods. "That works for me. I'll do the desk area."

They break apart and get to work. Sebastian had already packed up all the cords for his computer and carefully wrapped bubble wrap around the tower and monitors. Gingerly, he packs them into a sturdy box, stuffing more bubble wrap into it to keep the equipment from moving.

As soon as he is satisfied that nothing will move in the box, a gasp from Sam pulls his attention.

"Holy fuck! Do you remember this?"

Sam turns around to face him, holding a polaroid picture in his hand. Sebastian walks over, taking the photo from him. He gazes at the photo, showing both of them in Sebastian's room. They looked so young.

"Fuck! Is this from the first time I dyed my hair? Where did you find this?"

"It was in between a couple of movies. They were really dusty, so it must have fallen between them a while ago." He looked down at the photo in Seb's hand. "This was just before we started high school, so fourteen?"

"Demetrius was so pissed about my hair." Sebastian snickers at the memory. "I mean, I knew he wouldn't be super happy about it but, man, he didn't talk to me for like a week."

A small part of him at the time had hoped Demetrius would surprise him and be at least indifferent with his new hair. But when he went completely quiet towards him for a week, Sebastian's feelings for him had soured more than they had already been. They, for the most part, had stopped speaking to each other. When they did, it almost always turned into an argument. It was years later that Demetrius had told him that it wasn't that he hated Seb's hair, he just hadn't expected the change and had handled it in a terrible way.

Sebastian is still grateful everyday that Demetrius had agreed to work on their issues when Seb had started therapy. He was floored when Demetrius even suggested going with Sebastian to a few of his therapy sessions so he could get guidance from the professional. Although, if Sebastian thought about it, he really shouldn't have been that surprised. Demetrius was very practical like that.

"Robin didn't really care, at least." Sam was saying when he tuned back in. "But then your mom never really cared about what you did with your hair or clothes, piercings, tattoos."

Sebastian looked back down at the photo in his hand, smiling affectionately. "The black looks so much better than the red, at least. Too bad he—" He taps his younger self. "Hasn't realized how often he's going to have to touch up his roots." Sebastian laughs.

Sam let's out a groan. "At least you've learned to live with a little bit of roots between touch ups. I'm still surprised all your hair didn't fall out redoing it every three weeks when you could see the smallest hint of red growing out."

Sebastian elbows him in response. He tosses the photo into the box Sam had been filling before walking back to his desk. He plops onto the chair, opening a drawer and shuffling through the contents. Anything to keep, he throws in a box and tosses anything he doesn't into the garbage that sits underneath.

"Speaking of Robin and Demetrius, what are they up to today?" Sam asks, moving back to placing items from the shelves into the box. "I'm a little surprised your mom isn't here to hover over her baby leaving the coop."

"Leaving the nest. Or flying the coop." Sebastian corrects him, chuckling. "And, funny enough, she's working on a chicken coop for the new farmer—"

"Matt. His name is Matt," Sam says in an exasperated tone, even though he's grinning. Seb never did get the hang of calling the farmer by his name. "He's been living in Pelican for, like, two years."

"Yeah, him," Seb says, unbothered by the interruption. "Mom's working on a chicken coop for Matt. Demetrius had to run to Grampleton for something for an experiment he's working on. I kinda think they just wanted to get out of the way."

"Don't blame them. They're planning on going to up to Zuzu tomorrow, still?"

Sebastian doesn't hear the question. He had worked his way down to the bottom drawer of his desk, ruffling through the items. A small smile pulls at his mouth as he takes something in his fingers, holding it up for Sam to see.

"Look what I found!"

Sam is across the room in seconds. "Holy fuck! You still have this?"

Sebastian releases the bracelet into Sam's outstretched palm. The colours of the string — black, purple, and green — faded slightly in some spots but, otherwise, it looks exactly the same.

"I can't believe you kept this. I made this, what? When we were teenagers?"

"I wore it for a long time, too. I don't remember why I took it off. I wonder if…"

Sebastian takes the bracelet from Sam's hand, carefully wrapping it around his wrist, then holding it out for Sam. "Wanna tie it, please?"

He watches Sam through his eyelashes as Sam gently ties the bracelet, noticing the bob of his throat as he swallows, the slightest hint of colour to his cheeks, the pink of his tongue as he sticks it out ever so slightly in concentration.

Their eyes lock as Seb fully lifts his gaze. A chill slides up his spine causing goosebumps to form on his skin as Sam's thumb brushes along the bracelet. The air around them feels electric and Seb can't stop his eyes from sliding down to Sam's lips and—

DING!

A shock jolts through him as the moment dissolves in front of his eyes. Sebastian swears under his breath before he shifts to look at his phone on his desk.

He clears his throat. "Speaking of mom…" he picks up his phone. "She wants to know how things are going."

Sam straightens and looks around the room. "Great. Really good. You'll totally be packed in two or whatever hours." He snorts.

Sebastian groans. Fuck, why hadn't he started packing weeks ago?

He raises his hands to playfully shove Sam towards the other side of the room. "Alright, get back to it!"

"You know, pizza might not be worth packing all this up, then unpacking it all at your condo."

Seb huffs. "Maybe not but you love me and you would have helped even without the pizza."

"You're fucking lucky I love you this much," Sam mumbles. "And I get a whole large pizza to myself!"

Sebastian only laughs in response, turning his attention back to the drawer he was working on.

They continue to work in mostly silence, the only noise coming from Sam as he hums along to the music playing from his phone. Once Sebastian had finished the desk, he moves onto to his Solarian Chronicles table his mom had built for him many years ago. He works on securing the drawers that held his campaign things so they wouldn't fall out in the move.

As Sam moves to start in Seb's large closet, Sebastian moves to clean out his bedside table. He drags over the box he had placed the items from his desk in and got to work pawing through the drawers.

Towards the back of the drawer, he takes out a light blue and white clam shell. His eyebrows furrow as he looks at it, having no memory of why it was in there.

"You still have that?" Sam cries incredulously just as Sebastian was going to toss the shell in the garbage he had also pulled over from his desk.

Seb looks up at him in confusion. "Why do I have a shell? And why do you remember the shell?"

"Dude!" Sam looks at him in shock, mouth open a little. "I gave this to you when we were kids. You were… umm… I don't really remember. I remember you were upset and had walked to the beach during a lightning storm. Then, when we were walking back to my house, I found this and gave it to you."

Sam's words shakes the memory from the back of his mind. "I was upset at my dad, I think?" He begins slowly. "You took me back to your house and… uhh… did we build a blanket fort? And watch movies?"

Sam nods slowly. "Yeah. Yeah, we did! And mom made you pumpkin soup and hot chocolate to make you feel better. You still caught a bad cold, though. And you kept the shell with you this whole time?"

Seb looks down at the shell, thumb moving along the ridges of it. "I can't believe I forgot about that," he says quietly.

As Sam moves back to the closet, he says over his shoulder, "we were really young then, like ten or eleven. And people have memory problems in their old age, like you," he teases, making his usual joke about Seb being almost seven months older. With his back turned, he doesn't react as Seb flips him off.

They work for another hour or so, filled boxes slowly pilling up in the corner of the room. They had taken a small break to collapse on the couch and snack on the maple bars that Jodi had packed with Sam.

When they get back to it, Sebastian moves to the dresser while Sam moves back to finish the closet, both of them singing or humming along to the music still playing. Once the dresser is done, Sebastian turns to survey the room. Most of his things have been packed: the objects in his desk, bedside table, bookshelf gone; posters and pictures taken off the walls. It felt barren.

A noise catches his attention from the closet and he pauses. He waits nearly a minute, starting to think he imagined it, when it happens again. A sniffle.

Concern washes over him as his feet move automatically to the other side of the room.

"Sam?" He asks gently. There's no response.

Sam's back is to the door of the walk-in closet and Seb keeps his footsteps heavy in the hopes of not startling him. He raises a hand to his shoulder, gently turning him. Sam keeps his head down, gaze on the floor but the light betrays the wetness on his cheeks that he tries to hide.

"Sam, what's wrong?" He asks, trying to keep the urgency from his tone. He's not quite sure he managed it.

"I'm—" Sam's voice cracks. "I'm just really going to miss you."

It was then that Sebastian notices the object in Sam's hands. A plastic green frog with brownish spots, a white belly, and a yellow throat. He remembers the day that Sam gave him that frog. It was the day they met and became best friends.

Sam sniffs again, tears pooling in the corners of his eyes. "I'm sorry, I know it's selfish. I know Zuzu isn't far but with work and everything… I'm not going to get to see you as often, maybe only once or twice a month if I'm lucky. And I'm… I'm just really going to miss you." His tears finally escape, tumbling down his cheeks.

Maru's voice from earlier whispers in his mind. One of you has to be brave.

Sebastian raises his hands to either side of Sam's face, thumbs brushing along his cheeks, wiping the tears. He stares at Sam for a couple seconds, then, in a quiet voice, says, "come with me."

"What?" Sam croaks.

Seb swallows thickly. He drops one hand onto Sam's shoulder, the other cradling against his jaw. "Come with me. The condo has two bedrooms, so you can have your own room. And you can probably transfer to another Joja if you want. Or I can support both of us while you find something else you want to do."

Sam's forehead creases as he stares at Sebastian like he just grew two heads.

Taking a tiny, final step forward to place himself with less than a foot of space between them, Sebastian takes a deep breath. "Please, I don't want to leave you, either. I'd miss you too much."

Sam let's out a wet huff of a laugh. "Seb, be serious."

You got this. Be brave.

"I am. I'm being completely serious." He says quietly.

Sam narrows his eyes, contemplating Sebastian's words.

Staying quiet, Seb nervously chews on his bottom lip as he waits for Sam to say something, anything. It's too late to take it back, not that he ever would. He just prays to any deity that might listen that he hasn't ruined anything. His anxiety bubbles in his chest, making his heart race, his breathing come in shallow, palms sweating.

Sam, for his part, doesn't help with his anxiety, standing quietly, looking like he's fighting something internally.

A few seconds pass without a word. Seb takes a step back, removing his hands off Sam. Sam makes the smallest noise when he does but otherwise stays quiet.

Reaching into the neck of his hoodie, Sebastian takes out the light blue frozen tear necklace Sam had given him a few years ago.

Sam let's out a small, almost inaudible gasp. "You still wear this?" His fingers move to press against the mineral.

Please talk to him.

"Everyday." Sebastian responds, giving him a small smile. "It reminds me of you, of what you mean to me."

Sam's eyes raise slowly from the pendant to look at Seb.

Taking a steading breath, Sebastian continues, "you almost kissed me the night you gave me this, do you remember?"

Sam's eyes grow wide, lips parting slightly. "Seb—"Sam starts before cutting himself off, looking to the side.

Seb smiles a little wider, looking down at the frozen tear. "Actually, I definitely wanted to kiss you that night, so, I think we were both going to kiss each other. But then your mom called and I lost my nerve, and I'm guessing you lost yours." He lets out a sigh. "Then we just pretended nothing had happened. But… I don't want to pretend anymore, Sam."

Sam sniffs, finally meeting his eyes. "You don't?"

Shaking his head, Sebastian takes half a step forward, taking one of Sam's hands in his. He ignores his heart jackhammering against his ribs. "No, Sam. I really don't."

He's not sure who leans in first. Honestly, he really doesn't care. The moment their lips touch, the entire world stops. Warmth spreads across his chest as electricity travels up his spine. He can't help the shudder that rolls through him as Sam wraps both of his arms around his shoulders, one hand carding into the hair at the back of his neck. His own hands coming up to Sam's waist, fingers twisting into his shirt, pulling him closer.

He feels Sam's warm, slightly chapped lips as they press against his. He tastes the berry chapstick Sam uses. He smells Sam's vanilla shampoo, his eucalyptus body wash.

It's not an earth shattering kiss, but it's perfect. It's a slow, soft kiss. Gentle, in the way that he had always pictured Sam kissing him. And he happily melts into it.

The kiss only lasts for a few seconds but it feels like an eternity. They're both breathless when they break apart; Sebastian gently pressing their foreheads together, his grip on Sam's shirt loosening ever so slightly.

"We're fucking idiots," Sam mutters after a moment, the wisps of his breath warm against Seb's mouth.

Seb can't help letting out a small chuckle. "Yeah, we are."

Sam pulls away, just enough to look at him. A small, shy smile pulls at his lips as his eyes dart between Seb's.

Sebastian presses another kiss to Sam's lips, quick but chaste. "And I'm completely serious, by the way. I mean, no pressure or anything, but… come to Zuzu with me."

Sam's arms move from around Sebastian's shoulders, hands sliding down his arms until they intertwine with his fingers. He bites his lip as a look of confliction settles on his face. He looks down, not meeting Seb's eyes.

Sebastian's eyebrows furrow as his concern grows. "You can say no, Sam," he starts, squeezing their clasped hands reassuringly. "I know I kinda just sprang this on you. I'm not pressuring you into this. If it's not something you want…"

"I really want to, it's— it's just…"

Realization hits him. "Your mom and brother?" Sebastian guesses and gives a soft smile when Sam nods his confirmation. "Yeah. Yeah, I get that. And it's ok. We don't have to figure this out now. You're staying at the condo tonight, right? We can talk about it more later."

"You won't be mad if I don't go? At least not right now?" Sam asks quietly, barely above a whisper.

"Of course not! Sam…" he takes another breath before rushing forward. "You're my person. It's always been you. I love you. I can wait."

Sam's eyes go wide as he stares at Sebastian with an expression Seb can't quite decipher. His voice is small when he asks, "you love me?"

Sebastian's eyes close for a second, worried that he said the wrong thing. Worried that he was being too aggressive, too pushy, too open with his feelings. Fuck, he had hidden them quite well, he thought, since high school, not wanting to lose the most important relationship in his life over a stupid fucking crush.

Maybe Sam wasn't there yet. Maybe Sam's feelings for him were still new or still small or he hadn't really figured them out yet. Maybe it was still just a crush and he didn't feel the same way Seb did. Maybe he was chasing Sam away. Maybe he was being too fast.

Honestly, who the fuck says "I love you" two seconds after they first confess their feelings?

"Sebby?" Sam's worried voice jolts him out of his thoughts.

"Fuck, I'm sorry. I'm just springing everything on you all at once today. I'm— I'm sorry, I know I'm coming on too strong and—"

He was already moving back, taking a step away from Sam and tugging on his hands to release them from their grasp.

"No!" Sam's voice interrupts his spiral. He takes his own step forward, chasing Seb's attempt at putting space between them, hands tightening around his.

"No, Seb! It's just— I've imagined you saying it over and over— I mean, I never imagined you kissing me and saying it in a closet— which, I can't think of it right now, but I know there's a good joke in there— but… umm… I usually imagined it being a little more romantic—" Sebastian watches, frozen, as Sam rambles. "But… I love you, too. You're my person, too. You have been for a long time."

Sebastian lets out the breath he has been holding as Sam uses their intertwined hands to pull him against him and they meet again for another kiss, deeper this time. Wrapping his arms around Sam's waist, Seb pulls him even closer so their bodies are flush together. He doesn't remember moving but Sam let's out a small oof as his back bumps into the wall.

His breath hitches in his chest when he feels Sam's tongue against his bottom lip. His heart definitely skips a few beats as Sam's tongue brushes against his. And his brain absolutely short circuits at the sound of the low moan that's pulled from the back of Sam's throat.

He wishes they could stay like this forever but he's running out of air. They're panting when they pull apart, foreheads pressed together. Their warm breath mixes in the thin space between them. Sebastian's cheeks ache with how wide his grin is.

After a moment, when his breathing calms, Sam says, "we can figure this all out as we go. Now that we have this—" he bumps his nose against Seb's. "I'm not letting this go."

Sam pauses, moving his head back a little, eyes locking with Seb's. "Umm… this is a thing right? I kinda feel like I'm jumping the gun now since we obviously haven't talked about this but we kinda made out a little but… I want this to be a thing. I want us to be a thing."

Sebastian breathes out a laugh. "Well, I don't have the habit of just kissing people randomly, so yeah… I want us to be a thing, too."

"Okay, yeah. So… are we— are you—" Sam pauses, licking his lips, cheeks flushed a deep pink and a shy expression on his face. He takes a steading breath, like he's trying to pluck up the courage to continue his thought. "Are you my boyfriend?" He asks hopefully.

Sebastian didn't mean to laugh, he really didn't. He just really couldn't help it. This whole thing — Sam's arms around him, his lips on Sam's, and Sam's own lips pressing back against his in the same eagerness — it was all so surreal. He had dreamt of this, had wanted this, for so long. If someone had told him this would be how the day would go a few hours ago, he would never have believed them.

When he looks back at Sam, any remaining laughter immediately gets caught in his throat. He takes in the wary, almost hurt, look in Sam's eyes, his brows drawn in confusion.

He brings his hands up to cup Sam's face and kisses the tip of his nose before pressing their foreheads together again.

"Fuck, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to. It's just—" Sebastian nods, unable to stop the dopey, lopsided smile forming on his face. "Yes, Sam. I'm you're boyfriend. And you're mine."

Their lips are pressed together again, the world dissolving around them.

And if it takes the movers calling Sebastian's phone twice after they both missed all of their knocking, neither of them is particularly sorry.

~~~***~~~

Sam collapses back onto the wood floor, hand on his stomach. "I think I ate too much."

Sebastian laughs from his spot on the living room floor beside him, back pressed against a wall. "I told you not to eat the whole pizza."

"I know but I was starving! Those movers were absolute shit! We basically moved half the truck ourselves," Sam whines.

"I was paying them to move the stuff in, you know." Sebastian counters.

"Yeah but they charged by the hour. They were purposely taking their time!" Sam tips his head backwards to look at Sebastian.

"Well, good thing I don't plan on moving again for a long time. Or ever." Sebastian looks around the living room of his condo, his sore body making him glare at the large pile of boxes that he will need to find homes for. Eventually. That was a future him problem.

Sam shifts from his place on the floor, turning until his head is in Seb's lap. Seb smiles down at him as he leans forward to press a kiss on Sam's nose.

"I can't believe this is real. This feels like a dream." Sam sighs contently, eyes fluttering shut.

Sebastian cards his fingers through Sam's hair, still damp from his shower. "I know what you mean. This is a weird day. Good, amazing, but weird."

He was already having trouble remembering to call this condo his, his home. Now, thinking of Sam — his best friend, his confidant, his partner in crime since they were children — as his boyfriend seemed surreal.

They rest in silence for a moment, Sebastian continuing to lightly scratch Sam's head while his eyes stare out the glass of his patio doors as the sun sets behind the building across the street, mind too tired to think from the whirlwind of a day. Sam laying with his eyes closed, letting out soft, contented sighs every so often.

Seb jumps a little when he's brought back to the present. Sam had taken Seb's free hand that was resting on Seb's thigh, lacing their fingers and bringing it to his mouth to press a kiss on it.

He smiles up at him, setting their clasped hands on his chest. "You're really okay with all of this? With me waiting a few months before moving here?"

"You know I am," Seb responds, gently but firmly. "It'll give your mom and Vinny time to get used to the idea of you moving. That way you're not just dropping all this on them and then leaving."

"And it'll give me time to see if Joja can transfer me to a store here." Sam says with a flat tone.

Seb squeezes his hand, his other hand in Sam's hair stilling. "I told you, you don't need to go back to Joja. You hate that job. There's so much here, you can find something you actually like."

"And I told you that if I was going to live here I would be compensating my share of everything. We're not starting this—" he flicks a finger between them. "with you fully supporting me. I mean, unless they won't approve a transfer, of course. Then I'll start looking for something right away, so I'll hopefully have something else lined up when I move in."

"Sam—" Sebastian starts but is cut off when Sam moves his free hand over his mouth.

"Nope. No. I'm shutting that down and that's final!"

Seb let's out of huff of breath through his nose but doesn't argue further. If the situation were reversed, he'd say and do the same thing.

"Fine," he breathes, when Sam releases him. "Besides, like I said, we don't have to have everything figured out right now."

Sam grins up at him, lifting his free hand up to twist into the frozen tear necklace around Seb's neck, gently tugging it down. Getting the hint, Seb leans forward, kissing him.

Sebastian's eyes flick to the toy plastic frog laying beside Sam on the floor as they break part and smiles fondly.

"You're my best friend, Sam. My boyfriend…" he says, the word still sounds weird to his ears but makes his heart fill with glee. "We have our whole lives ahead of us to figure stuff out. I love you, so much."