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The first time it happened I passed it off as a weird encounter with a stranger who I would probably never see again in my life. This is my life we’re talking about though and I really should have known better.
I never minded the dentist, quite the opposite actually. The idea of coming back every six months for a checkup was always a time of celebration for me. I prided myself on having a good relationship with my dentist due to my consistency with my brushing and flossing. Dr. Latimer and I had an understanding and he never judged me for practically salivating over the thought of getting a cleaning. I really, really liked him up until about a month ago when I received a letter informing me of his retirement. It was a simple post card with a picture of my favorite dentist that I had been going to for seven years, since I was eighteen, waving at the camera with a speech bubble saying “Brace yourself for this- it’s finally goodbye.”
I had stared down at the stupid pun as my eyebrows scrunched together and I tried to convince myself that crying over your dentist’s retirement is really lame. Flipping the card to the back I discovered that Dr. Latimer had scrawled in a note letting me know I was his most valued patient and not to forget to brush twice a day. Under this was a recommendation for another dentist in the area who was promised to be just as good as he was.
Yes, but will they kink shame me when I start moaning about how beautiful my teeth look in the mirror right after they finish cleaning them?
I rolled my eyes at my own thoughts, bit the bullet, and called the new dentist- Dr. Trent. Her assistant seemed nice enough in answering all my questions and although I was sad about leaving the comfort Dr. Latimer gave me, I realized that I was probably over reacting. I immediately set my first appointment with the new doctor for about a month away.
***
As I walked into the new office, which was conveniently only about five minutes from my old one, the first thing I noticed was that it was crowded. Almost all of the seats were taken and no matter where I sat, I would be sitting next to a stranger. After checking in and verifying all of my information with the receptionist who told me to take a seat, I glimpsed around the waiting room. My options were limited but I noticed a spot where I would only have to sit next to one stranger as there were no seats to the left of the open chair.
Newly determined, I quickly made my way over and plunked myself ungracefully into the seat. The man to my right instantly turned to glance at me and I could see his leg bouncing up and down as I looked him over. Apparently he took my glance to mean I was friendly as he immediately began speaking.
“Hey there. This your first time here?” The man had a deeper voice than I expected and I was slightly taken aback. He looked to be mid to late twenties and had a black fringe similar to my own. This man wasn’t unattractive, I couldn’t help but notice.
“Uh, yeah,” I responded, not really one to converse with strangers in a dentist’s office.
It was like my response set off some kind of chemical reaction and suddenly the man was talking so fast and low that my eyes widened in surprise.
“Yeah, me too. I wasn’t expecting it to be so crowded, you know? It kind of sucks because we have to wait longer but I guess that just means that the dentist is really good, right? I’m also here pretty early, my appointment isn’t even until 3:30 and its only 2:45 now but I get kind of nervous about these appointments so I like to get here a little early.”
I found myself kind of rudely staring at this man silently, processing everything he said to me.
“Uhh… yeah,” I realized too late that I had just repeated what I had said earlier.
The man’s eyes shot around the waiting room as the next patient was called. A woman who was maybe in her late fifties stood up and headed towards the door leading into the next room.
“So, erm, what are you in for?” Once again, his eyes did a sweep of the office.
By this point, I looked around the room too to see if maybe there was anything odd or out of the ordinary around. This man was acting like we were in prison rather than a dentist’s office. Turning back to face the man I finally responded.
“Just a standard cleaning.” I started to wonder if maybe I should be wary of this strange person who wouldn’t stop talking to me and acted like he was guilty of a crime.
Before the man could respond to my short answer, the nurse had returned and called out “Dan Howell?” I quickly stood up before turning back to the stranger, hoping to close the conversation on a polite note.
“That you?” The man questioned before I could get anything out.
I nodded quickly and gave him a quick “alright then” before heading to where the nurse was waiting. After a thorough cleaning with the new dentist who seemed to have a great sense of humor and assured me that she wouldn’t have become a dentist if she didn’t love teeth just as much as I did, I was heading back home, happy with the experience. The man in the waiting room didn’t even cross my mind.
***
The second time it happened, I started to wonder about the man’s history. Maybe he really did have a history with prison. Maybe he was just trying to scare me. Maybe he was just weird.
I walked into the waiting room six months after my first appointment, ready to have my teeth scrubbed. I took notice of the waiting room which wasn’t as crowded as my first experience and took a seat where I happily had both seats on either side of me open. I busied myself with checking my twitter account on my phone when I felt a body occupy the seat to my right. Looking over, I didn’t immediately recognize the man to be anybody I knew and although I thought it was annoying that he chose to sit next to me directly when there were many other open seats, I ignored him in favor of my twitter feed.
However the man cleared his throat and the second he spoke, I realized I knew him.
“So, what are you in for this time?” I was immediately thrown back to my small interaction I had six months ago in this same office. This was the guy who acted like he was pleading guilty in a murder trial.
I shook my head at his choice of wording. It’s only the dentist, Jesus, man.
“Regular cleaning,” I answered, only then thinking that it was weird that this guy recognized me after six months. I didn’t even know his name. I decided to investigate further. “What about you?”
I shouldn’t have been surprised at his onslaught of words.
“Oh, yeah, just a cleaning for me too. Their system automatically schedules the next appointment for six months later so you can’t skip out on your appointment like a lot of people do. I guess it’s a good system but I kind of hate it. I’d rather skip the appointment if I’m honest.”
That explained how we both ended up here at the same time again. I was actually planning on responding and attempting to get some information out of this guy but before I could answer, I heard my name being called and looked at him apologetically.
“Good luck.” He called with wide eyes as I walked away.
I chuckled silently to myself as I walked through the door, wondering why this guy thought I needed it.
***
The third time, I at least recognized the guy when he sat down next to me. I made a bit of a point of looking around the waiting room at the many open spaces he could have chosen before turning back to him raising an eyebrow. So what if I was a bit of a dick, I wasn’t really in the mood for his criminal attitude right then. It had been a long week and I was looking forward to my cleaning as a kind of ‘pick me up.’ Some people went to bars, I went to the dentist. Does that make me so weird?
Yes. My thoughts helpfully supplied.
“Back again,” the man said as if he was judging me for being arrested twice within six months. But no, this was still just a dentist’s office.
“A cleaning.” I answered before he could ask.
“I figured. It kind of sucks that we have to come twice a year, doesn’t it?”
I made a non committal noise in response and pulled out my phone.
You’re an asshole. My thoughts returned. Fuck off, I don’t even know him.
I realized that having a conversation with myself made me just as weird as the man next to my left and gripped my phone tighter.
“I, uh, always hated that as a kid, too. My mom never let me skip it.” This guy was trying so hard.
“You shouldn’t skip it, anyways, it’s good for you,” I pressed my lips into a tight line and looked over at the man. He was staring at me and I finally noticed his eyes. They were blue, with some yellow and green. Objectively, they were nice. As I looked on, however, I noticed fear. Curiosity jumped at me and I was almost tempted to demand to know why he was scared. Breaking eye contact, I looked down to notice his leg shaking again. This guy really had a bit of a nervous tick, didn’t he?
“I don’t like the dentist.” He grumbled and I was hit with the need to protect this man from any harm. I don’t care why he hates the dentist; I’d eliminate them all if it meant I didn’t have to see that pout on his face again.
I found myself observing how attractive this stranger was once more as I responded, “and why’s that?”
“Dan Howell?” This had to be the first time my name was called that I regretted having our conversation end. The man gave me a small smile as I stood up to leave.
“Bye Dan. Good luck.” I gave him a slight wave as I was led back.
“You too,” I said genuinely. He seemed like he needed it.
***
The fourth time I encountered the man, I had two goals in mind: to find out why he hated the dentist and to find out his name. Maybe it was weird that I was thinking about a strange man I had conversed with a total of three times with six months spread out between each time but this guy had started to add to my happy dentist experience. My life wasn’t very exciting. I walked into the office with purpose, ready to be social for the first time in my life, only to realize he wasn’t there. That’s right; usually he comes in after me. I made sure to sit in a place where there were two open seats near me and then waited.
The second he walked in I immediately recognized him. He was wearing glasses today, however, and his hair was pushed back into more of a quiff. I had to admit he looked great. He checked in with the receptionist and then made his way over to me without even seeming to realize it. After he sat down, I turned to him and took in his tortured expression.
“Don’t look so happy,” I said cheerfully.
He shot me a look that wasn’t necessarily annoyed but floated somewhere along that line. “I feel like it gets worse each time.”
I didn’t mean to laugh but his wording just added to my theory that he has jail and the dentist’s mixed up. “So what happened that ruined all dentistry for you?” I said, as if there wasn’t a six month gap between this conversation each time.
“It’s just so scary. They jab at your teeth- which are technically exposed bones, by the way- with a long curved hook and then dig it straight into the middle of the most painful spot and then they start drilling away at your gums with what feels like a torture device from hell only to finish the whole thing off with ‘you’re bleeding because you don’t floss.’”
I absolutely couldn’t contain the smile that spread fully across my face. Did this man get more adorable or am I just in a great mood today?
“Okay, first of all, teeth and bones: very different things. I won’t get into it with you because you don’t seem like it concerns you much but just know that there’s a difference.” The eye roll I received in response was already worth it. “Second, I don’t think Dr. Trent is trying to hurt you, maybe if you have a cavity, that’s why it hurts. It’s never hurt me before.”
He opened his mouth as if to argue but I held up my hand and continued on. “And finally, if you flossed every day, twice a day along with when you brushed, you probably wouldn’t bleed as much.”
For the first time since meeting this guy, he gave me a bit of a sour look as if he maybe didn’t want to continue talking to me. I found messing with him to be brilliant. It was then that my name was conveniently called by the nurse. It felt too soon.
Standing, I turned back to the man with one final thing to leave him with. “You’re cute when you’re angry.”
I winked and started walking away, appreciating how he was battling a smile as if to still seem annoyed.
It was only once I returned home that I realized I didn’t get his name.
***
Maybe it’s pathetic and it just goes to show that I really should’ve been spending the next six months looking for a relationship or at least some more friends, but the fifth time I saw the pretty stranger in the dentist’s office, I was ready.
I had been thinking about my next appointment with anticipation not just for the cleaning, but also with the goal in mind to get cute dentist boy’s name and maybe number. I didn’t have to wait long before the door was opening and in walked a now familiar face. I smiled at him when he made eye contact with me and he quickly returned it.
As he was checking in I pumped myself up a bit, no more messing around, I’ve got a purpose today and it’s not to get my teeth cleaned.
Well, actually, it is, but its most certainly not my main priority. This guy has been in my life for two years now and I’ll be damned if I’m leaving without his name.
“Good to see you, Dan. You’ve become my anchor, you know?”
This tripped me up slightly and I took a moment to be confused.
“Huh?”
“I hate the dentist, as you can probably tell. And every time I talk to you, I feel less scared. It’s like when I walk in here and see how strangely excited you are for someone to brush your teeth, it can’t be all that bad. It never is that bad actually. I’m not sure whether that’s because of you or the doctor is just good but I’m gonna give you most of the credit here.”
I smiled at his small speech and then my mouth was moving against my will.
“Who are you??” I demanded. It came out a little harsher than I meant for it to but I was just excited about finally knowing his name.
His eyes widened slightly and he started to sputter in response.
“O-oh, I thought. Oh, god. I figured you would recognize me but of course it’s been six months. I’m sorry, this must be awkward, and you’re probably wondering how I even know your name. We usually talk whenever we have an appointment and I’ve just remembered it from when the nurse calls it out. Is that weird? It is weird, isn’t it?”
I stared in confusion before realizing that my question must’ve given him the impression that I didn’t recognize him at all. Once I realized my mistake I started talking very quickly.
“OH! No, I know who you are! I mean, I totally recognize you and I think it’s amazing and really sweet that I’m your ‘anchor’. I just meant that it’s been, like, two years since we first started talking and I don’t even know your name and that’s hardly fair because you’ve always known mine because I’m always called first and I just maybe wanted to be able to talk to you more than twice a year in a dentist’s office so maybe I could add you on facebook or something. Or. If that’s weird maybe we could exchange numbers? Maybe that’s weirder, uh-”
“Dan!” I was cut off by the man who was now smiling. “My name’s Phil.”
***
Six months later I found myself back at Dr. Trent’s small but efficient little dentist’s office, ready for my cleaning. I couldn’t keep the smile off my face as I walked in, for good reason. Heading straight to the receptionist, I pulled my boyfriend along with me by the hand.
“Dan Howell? I have an appointment at 3. Also, Phil Lester has his appointment at 3:30.” I couldn’t keep the grin off my face as I turned to look at Phil, who was gripping my hand slightly too tight. After checking in, I pulled Phil to a couple of empty seats and sat down.
“Well this is familiar,” Phil murmured, looking right at me. Phil’s eyes were something that I had grown to appreciate much more over time, the blues, greens, and yellows more than simply ‘objective’ beauty as I once thought while sitting in this office.
“Hmm,” I hummed, playing with his fingers as we waited for my name to be called. I was always first. Suddenly I was struck with a thought that made me laugh out loud.
“What?” Phil questioned, looking suspicious.
“Well. It’s just that. I remember thinking that you were so weird because of the way you acted those first few times I met you. You acted like this place was a jail house saying things like ‘what are you in for?’” I put on an over exaggerated northern accent pretending to mimic Phil from over two years ago.
Phil pouted and pulled his hand away from mine.
“I was scared,” he argued. I quickly interlaced our fingers again and brought the back of his hand up to mine to give it a quick kiss.
“I know, I’m just saying, it was slightly worrying. I thought you had a history.”
“Me? You thought I had a history of prison? Wow, thanks,” Phil rolled his eyes but I knew he was only nervous about his appointment.
“Don’t worry. You’ll be okay. And then you won’t have to come back for six more months,” I smiled gently at him.
“Dan Howell?” The nurse never failed. I stood up, reluctantly separating my hand from Phil’s.
“I’ll see you soon,” I said, walking away.
“Good luck,” Phil called to me.
I smiled and turned back briefly, “You too.”