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Candidly, it was well worth it to endure a stomach full of searing hot sauce (just how did humans create such a devilish concoction?!) just to have seen the hunters make utter fools of themselves. The looks on their faces as the'd squeaked down the slides and flopped into the ball pit was picture perfect. The so-called Huntr/x would be wearing that embarrassment on their sleevs on every social media account right up until Gwi-Ma ate the city.
The Saja Boys laugh among themselves as they skip to the bathhouse, well aware the sore losers were soon to be scrambling after them. So far their debut had gone flawlessly; crowds of humans enamoured by their enchanting looks and voices, hailing Soda Pop all over social media. With nothing but hot sauce and feigned politeness, they had a whole audience laughing delightedly at their game antics and seeing just how flawed their precious Huntr/x was. The Honmoon already quivering weakly at the loss of adoration, shuddering from the emboldened efforts of other demons to peel through it.
All this success in just one day after centuries of monotonous failure. Jinu should pat himself on the back for such an ingenious scheme. It's taken a long time to finalise the plan, true, but patience had truly been a virtue. While Gwi-Ma impotently flailed and complained, Jinu had mastered understanding the fickle modern human's desires and put together the perfect crew to exploit it. Good singing, catchy lyrics, and pretty faces. It really was that easy, wasn't it?
Jini would be rubbing this in Gwi-Ma's face if he knew he wouldn't be put through a memory blender immediately after. As it stands, just keep cool and enjoy the moment.
"Did you see the way the little one was pouting? Think she almost swallowed that ball!"
"Hah, pinkie was fuming! We could have roasted a chicken egg on that big ol' forehead."
"These are the hunters that have killed like a thousand goons these past few years? These are what we're up against? They can't even bend that far, worst flexibility I've seen in centuries."
"Well what you do you expect, the last set had one of them putting out for that complete loser, Been Sock or whatever. Human women have to be easier than incubi for that to have worked."
Jinu's boys gleefully snickered and joked among themselves, revelling in their success. Jinu smirks as he leads them on, satisfied with the competence of his cohorts. He'd had a few minor concerns whether the group would pull off seeming human- Mystery still thought barks were a way of expressing polite appreciation- but the performances had been nothing short of spectacular. Choreography, on point. Lyrics, infectious. Hair, immaculate. Jinu had to say, the amount of conditioning and skincare cropped up over four hundred years was nothing short of magnificent. End result? Seoul was immediately smitten by the Saja Boys and begging for more.
Yeah, they've earned a little bit of fun. And what better fun than to keep humiliating their rivals? By the time Gwi-Ma rose to consume their souls, the hunters may just be begging for eternal end to spare themselves all the embarrassment. Thus, a run to the bathhouse. Here would be a nice and calm environment to continue watching Huntr/x slip and slide like idiots chasing after them. Jinu supposed he was being a bit petty, given that lead singer of theirs was flaunting her patterns and the other two didn't care a bit while he would always be hiding beneath a second skin, but then again, they had tried to jump them during a game show.
Poor class.
The bathhouse is lovely, all sweltering steam and various incense scents. It reminded the Saja Boys of the boiling mud pits down in the underworld, just better smelling and with less water demons trying to bite your toes off. Once they'd had their fun leading Huntr/x into goose chases, traps, whatever entertained them most, the Saja Boys would be sure to come back here. Romance is already drifting his fingers through a steaming bath, contemplating how good it would make his hair glisten. Abby thinks the steam is working wonders on emphasizing his abs, and Baby- why does he still have a hot sauce bottle?- says they better keep these things running smoothly once Gwi-Ma took over.
Fair sentiment. Some of the things humans have made since his time are frankly awesome. Jinu's sure once he hands the city to Gwi-Ma that he could convince him to keep a few humans around to keep making Godzilla movies.
Jinu can hear footsteps in the distance. Huntr/x, doubtlessly, clearly desperate for payback. Flexing, he beckons the boys gather to him as he folds his arms.
"Poses, boys. Best way to keep them thrown off is to keep playing them as girls, not hunters."
The rest of them pose by him- Jinu tries not to think too hard on why Abby always insists on touching him- and wait for Huntr/x. Presentation is half the battle when it came to pop stars, and the Saja Boys have practiced extensively for every scenario. Pose for an audience, pose to irritate rivals, pose just for the sake of it. Good thing about having centuries to work with, really.
As expected, Huntr/x is on the scene, bursting through the door with glowing weapons in hand. They look absolutely peeved, practically snarling, hackles raised. The lead singer's even got some amber in her eyes. Jinu had wondered whatever became of that one loser's fling with a hunter, and lo and behold, it resulted in a messy girl who made messy mistakes. Jinu idly wondered just what she's had to stoop to in order to get the other two to like her.
Jinu opens, playing the scenario up like dopey girls chasing boys instead of hunters pursuing demons.
"Did you really follow us in here?"
Abby follows up, mocking disdain as evident as the steam wafting over his abs.
"I knew they would. That one's always looking at me."
Pinkie and the short one complain they aren't. The leader just glares at the Saja Boys, more of the demon obvious in the irritated hiss she gives.
"You know, we could have just made this quick. But you guys had to go and make that game show make us look like idiots!"
Baby pops the hot sauce bottle out his mouth and drawls.
"You three don't need any help from us or a game show for that."
Short one honestly puts down her knives and gets her fists up.
"Okay, nah, that one I'm taking down myself-"
The leader quiets her with a twirl of her sword, before a sly smirk crosses her lips. Jinu narrows his eyes. That's looking a bit too smug for someone who'd just been seething for some violence. He wonders briefly if he should break out the reinforcements now, or just turn and run, try and catch them stumbling. Before Jinu might make a decision, the leader says with newfound smugness.
"But you know what? That just taught us a good lesson. Sometimes you just gotta play dirty."
And then, rather surprisingly, the three of them pull over some of the stools and sit down. Legs crossed, arms folded, all polite and lady-like, waiting for the show to start. The identical looks of gleeful anticipation they've put on is pretty unnerving. Jinu and his boys exchange befuddled glances. Not even a throw of those knives? No song? Romance dares to point out the discrepency here.
"Um, you know this is the part where you three are supposed to try and chase us? Slay us, hunt us, whatever floats your boat?"
Pinkie speaks up, voice practically dripping with amusement, pointedly making a turn motion with her index finger.
"Sure it is. But who said it was just us three?"
Blinking in confusion, the Saja Boys turn around.
Oh.
Unseen to the demons, another woman has entered the bathhouse from the rear door, presenting an image of stern authority with folded arms and a sharpness in her eyes. She's older than any of Huntr/x, a tasteful streak of grey in her long black hair, but as refined and stylish an idol as the three hunters. Dressed dapper in a silky smooth white suit, black tie and a glossy gold sun badge, the woman's style is as charming as her dark expression is unnerving. The Saja Boys weren't entirely familiar with the hunters who preceded Huntr/x, but they knew this woman was more than they seemed, a fact confirmed when she voiced exactly what they were.
"So, these are the demoniacal delinquents causing you trouble?"
She speaks coolly, calmly, the image of a woman heading a meeting. But there's something fiery beneath her tone, something ominous in her eyes. Taller than any of Huntr/x, the elegant image she presents belies a subtle shudder to her limbs, like muscles twitching in readiness to fire. With the steam billowing around her, the woman gives the impression of something terrifying waiting in darkness or mist, enough to coax the Saja Boys to take a collective step back.
Huntr/x all nod at once, holding each other's hands as they put on shark-like grins of anticipation. In unison, they chirp their adoring affirmation.
"Yes Celine!"
Celine nods slowly, a sense of understanding on her expression. It's not the comprehension of a target, but rather the cold caculcation on how to make said target suffer. The ominous glint to her eyes grows more intense. This is more than a hunter enraged by troublesome quarry. This is the simple and raw anger of a mother seeing her beloved children disrespected. The only question in her mind right now is which boy is getting destroyed first?
For a moment, the Saja Boys have just a flicker of unease before they steady and aim for unconcerned expressions. Unnerving as Celine's appearance may be, they have numbers and the confidence of humiliating Huntr/x on their side. Abby puts on the bluster first, snorting as he looms over Celine, eyes flashing amber and his grin sharp.
"What, we're supposed to be afraid that the hunters put an old lady on us? C'mon, check the math here, no way this hag is taking on all five of us."
Baby eyes Celine surprisingly appreciatively and offers.
"I mean, I can think of another way she can take on all five of us."
Romance and Mystery start chortling. Abby flexes. Celine's expression does not change, cool and stern, sizing up each of them with the methodical cunning of an ambush hunter waiting to strike. The lack of response unsettles the demons, who briefly glance to their leader as to what comes next.
Jinu dope smacks his boys in four quick motions and snorts, playing it safe first with basic intimidation.
"Look, I don't know exactly what game those hunters are playing, but take some advice, lady. You don't want to be here right now. Why don't you skip along back to your cosy retirement now before you end up like the interspecies freak?"
Alright, Jinu will admit sometimes he talks a bit too big. He had been fortunate, for example, Gwi-Ma was too worn down from hunger to immediately punish him for that song. At the jab on that hunter who'd done the nasty with a loser demon, even the other Saja Boys whistle low, and behind them pinkie and the short one put firm hands on their leader's shoulders to keep her from rushing in. And now, seeing the way Celine's eyes flicker and fixate on him like she were a tiger who'd just seen the easiest deer in the herd to crunch, he thinks he's talked too big this time. Jinu expects her to go right for him, but to his surprise, Celine coolly states.
"Girls. Put on Mi-yeong's favourite, won't you?"
Huntr/x is promptly alive with song, tapping their weapons to a beat as they sang a jaunty rhythm that coaxes shimmering rings of the Honmoon to encircle the room. As the Saja Boys look around in horror at the dazzling light surrounding them, concentrated to keep any of their back-up from arriving, Celine unfolds her arms and puts one hand in the other, cracking her knuckles with a resounding jolt that echoes through the bathhouse. With a low hum, somewhere between casual and predatory, she asks.
"Now, Rumi dear. Which one knocked you over?"
Rumi, grin broad as can be while she sings, tauntingly points at Jinu, who thinks he feels something drop down below that shouldn't drop. Brilliant, so that little tattle on top of his jab at the other hunter. Great. Jinu has just a second to curse his luck before Celine moves.
Understandably, he's dropped hard. Celine swung so fast even his reflexes couldn't catch it, fist smashing right into his nose. Good thing demon physiology wasn't entirely human, even for former humans, otherwise he'd be all bones and blood spurting everywhere.
As it stands, Jinu feels his brain ringing as he stares blankly at the ceiling, put on his back ten feet from where he'd been standing. The steam of the bathouse is parted in a humanoid outline, comically telling of how fast he'd been knocked back. Jinu vaguely makes out Huntr/x's outlines close above him, all three mockingly brushing their shoulders as they sang their song. The lyrics are ringing painfully in his head and Jinu groans dejectedly as he tries to pull himself back together. Pretty hard to do, really, when his pretty face might probably have caved in a bit.
The other Saja Boys don't fare much better. Celine may be one hunter as opposed to three, but she moved exactly as expected of a mother scorned on her girl's behalf. A gut shot has Abby bending over, wheezing hard, and a kick to the leg topples Romance with a yelp. Baby is fast enough to try and claw at her before she goes for him, but Celine ducks under the swipe, puts herself right against him, and flips the demon over his shoulder. Baby's back hits the floor with a resounding smack and his hot sauce bottle goes flying up.
Mystery swings in to cover for his comrades, but Celine's quicker on the draw, grabbing the bottle mid-air and shoving it right into his mouth. A single tear drips down Mystery's cheek as the spicy nightmare pours down his throat, and then it comes right back up when Celine's knee drives into his stomach. Not very pretty, and he's left staggering away, spitting up hot sauce and trying to wipe the tears away even as his belly feels concave.
Romance and Abby are back up, lunging, but Celine sidesteps the latter and seizes the former by his long hair. Romance yelps in pain as she pulls him by the pink, crying out about cheating, conditioners, what have you. Abby is back, swiping at her, and ends up accidentally slashing Romance's face when Celine holds him front of her as a meat shield. Romance wails in pain and Abby has the courtesy to look abashed.
"Oh wow, sorry bro-"
Celine swings Romance again and bodily crashes him into Abby, sending both demons toppling into a bath with a great splash of steaming water. She turns and sees Mystery coming for her, snarling in fury. Baby is back up and opts to teleport, trying to catch Celine from behind while she's distracted. Of course, all she need do is simply duck to the side as red mist puffs behind her and Mystery ends up crashing into Baby. The two demons flail apart with yelps of irritation, and the second Baby takes to snap angrily at Mystery is the second Celine is back. She takes both by the heads and rams their faces together with a satisfying thud.
Mystery staggers back, dazed, and Celine graciously topples him onto his back with a sweep. Baby, on the other hand, has the misfortune for the woman to hiss right in his face.
"Still think there's only one way I take all five of you?"
Celine gets her other arm around him, swings him upwards, and delivers Baby headfirst to the floor via a perfect spinning piledriver.
The demon flops over, dazed out of his mind, just as Romance and Abby manage to pull themselves out of the bath. With all the anger of soaked rats, they shake off the steam and bare their claws. Behind Celine, Mystery is getting back up, livid as can be, but all she does as the three demons circle her is flex her arms and sigh.
"Seems Gwi-Ma doesn't make them like he used to."
Huntr/x exchange excited looks, continuing to sing with the enthusiasm expected of girls seeing their mother clean house, the Honmoon rippling brightly for their enthusiasm.
Abby swings, but Celine ducks, hooking an arm around his midsection. She uses the momentum to twist around him, kicking Romance and Mystery back, before planting her feet and hauling the surprised demon upwards. Abby has a second to ponder his life choices before Celine executes a German suplex, ramming him headfirst into the floor. As he slumps aside, she's already back up, seeing Baby coming for her with claws bared and fangs glinting. One swipe parried, two swipes parried, and then Celine headbutts him, dazing the demon enough she can easily seize an arm and swing him around, knocking him into Romance and Mystery. All three go down in a heap, their humiliation finalised when Celine heaves Abby over her head and tosses him onto the trio.
That's that.
Jinu is finally back up, and he's flabbergasted to see how badly his boys did even with a four on one advantage. The infuriating tunes of Huntr/x ringing behind him, Jinu grits his teeth and braces himself for a fight. He's got to lock in right now and put this old woman in her place. Celine turns, fixing him with a disdainful expression, and beckons him with the cold confidence of someone who's already won and frankly is getting bored of the effort.
He lunges, swipes, and she sidesteps, punches. Jinu ducks out the way, kicks out, Celine hops over the strike and retaliates with her own sweep. Jinu leaps back to dodge, lunges again, and this time catches a few strands of hair off her head when Celine weaves away from the claws. He smirks at her, and Celine raises an eyebrow, bemused. He goes for her, aiming for the throat, and she's ready with a punch. Right before impact, Jinu teleports, and then he's behind her, aiming for her exposed back-
Celine turns on a dime, catching his wrists, and pulls him in. Jinu doesn't have time to react before she puts her knee right between his legs. There's the faintest cracking sound. Even Huntr/x flinch, their song finally ending.
Keeping him held close to her, her knee digging ever deeper, Celine leans in and whispers softly.
"Credit where it's due. It was a catchy tune. I'll keep that beat in mind next time I'm auditioning another side act."
Then she lets Jinu stumble back and flop down onto the other Saja Boys, all frankly down and out. He has an expression of the rawest pain on his face, unable to even voice it as he stares blankly into space. Brushing her hands, Celine sighs and eases out any tension in her legs, cooling down from beating all five demons into a mess. Striding over to loom over the pile of groaning losers, Celine folds her arms and speaks with a cold certainty.
"The only reason I don't reduce all of you to ash right now is simply respect for the game. Talent is talent, so maybe next time think of going straight and singing for the fans instead of that worthless king. Now, do yourselves a favour and crawl back down to Gwi-Ma. Tell him he'll have to do better than stepping onto our turf. Oh, and keep this in mind- any of you ever disrespect my girls again, next time, I'll feed all of you each other's manhoods piece by piece."
The demons, excluding the shellshocked Jinu, wheeze in response.
"Yes ma'am, sorry ma'am."
"Mommy, I can't feel my legs."
"I hate my life."
"I hate your life too, dude."
The Honmoon helpfully eases open a crack in its shimmering light and Celine disdainfully kicks the Saja Boys one by one through its opening. When the last one falls through, Huntr/x sing a short melody and the glowing barrier seals.
With all said and done, the girls hop to their feet and promptly race forward, giggling delightedly as they seize Celine in a group hug. She chuckles fondly, embracing her girls in turn, and teasingly hums.
"Now, girls, I'm flattered you call me to help out, but I hope next time you act more sensibly when dealing with unconventional tactics. Poor Bobby's already going to have a fun day explaining why you three seemed intent on crashing those boy's game show."
The three of them looked sheepish as they cuddle her tighter, each unwilling to admit their hastiness but soon succumbing to the fond look of motherly concern Celine gave them.
"Yes Celine, sorry Celine."
"Well, I'm sure you three have learned your lesson. When in doubt, don't make a scene, okay?"
"Okay Celine."
She squeezes them tigher, proud of her girls all the same, and then Zoey chirps.
"I mean, while we're all here, can we have a bathhouse break?"
"Wow Zoey, you can't just ask your girlfriend's mom to the bathhouse when your girlfriend is right there."
"Yeah, maybe a bit much, Zoey."
"Hey, I didn't mean it like that! We need to hang out with Celine more often, you probably get lonely over at the estate, right?"
"Zoey, don't double-down, I'm already embarrassed enough today-"
"Actually you know what I'm changing my mind, I'm down for bringing my girlfriend's mom to the bathhouse-"
"MIRA!"
Celine rolled her eyes, chuckling as her girls got to playfully arguing. How she did adore them so.
