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Porchay dodged another group of tourists who had stopped in the middle of the walk way to take pictures of the lights reflecting off the water. It was easily the fifth group of people he’d had to move out of the way for at this point and he’d been here for barely an hour. As he got his bearings again he looked over the crowd trying to find his brother. He was pretty sure Porsche and Kinn had snuck off some where to make out even though they'd claimed to be getting food. They had all seen the way they'd been eyeing each other (gross), and while Porchay didn't actually want to catch them, he'd like to know if they were going to reappear with food any time soon or if he needed to deal with the lines in front of one of the food trucks himself.
As he scanned the crowd, Porchay had to admit it wasn't looking good for him since he couldn't catch sight of them. The smell of cooking meat was drawing him ever closer to the masses of people with no brother to be seen. He really didn’t want to stand in line. He should have eaten before they came out, but Tankhun had been so excited as he pushed everyone out of the doors and towards the cars. It may have been Korn's idea - forced family bonding between the younger generation - but Tankhun had run with it the moment it was suggested. He'd even been gracious about Vegas and Macau coming along because it meant he got to spend time with Pete.
Porchay was never going to understand any of them and he didn't want to.
The thousands of lights strung up along Chao Phraya River were a rainbow of colour reflecting off every surface around and the fair grounds were loud with upbeat music. He'd always wanted to come to the Christmas event. Porchay wasn't going to let the fact that his brother had disappeared into the crowd with his incredibly handsy boyfriend deter him from having fun. A lack of money was no longer the driving force of their lives, and Porchay wanted to experience everything about the event even if he was annoyed by the crowds of people. That meant waiting in lines.
The crowd surged forward again and as it pushed Porchay along with it he lost his footing. Even as he was mentally cursing and trying to stop himself from falling a hand wrapped itself firmly around his arm and yanked him back. He stumbled backwards, dazed and more than a little baffled, as a different arm looped around his torso, holding him still against a firm chest. He blinked down at the hand - chipped blue nail polish, multi coloured corded bracelets, a black leather jacket sleeve - in confusion as his brain refused to accept that it was Kim holding onto him.
Then the woodsy cologne that Kim liked to wear filled Porchay’s senses and made it impossible to deny that he was pressed against Kim. The scent had always been addictive. It usually left Porchay a little fuzzy headed and hot under the collar knowing he used to smell it when pressed close to Kim.
"Careful," Kim's voice said, hot and low and right in his ear. Porchay couldn’t stop himself from shivering as Kim’s arm tightened around him.
Porchay gave himself a second, then another one, pretending to catch his breath from nearly falling. When he thought he had the heart eyes under control - please let him have the heart eyes locked away - he looked behind himself and gave Kim a slight smile. He pushed himself away from Kim, broke free of the arms holding him back, and held himself straighter when he wanted to curl back into Kim.
It was so intoxicating to be wrapped up in him.
"Thank you," Porchay said carefully, controlled. He'd been ignoring Kim's presence rather well all evening so far. It had been harder to ignore the way his heartbeat picked up whenever he caught sight of the other man. It wasn’t fair that Kim had decided to follow along with Tankhun, Arm, and Pol the same way Porchay had.
He should have tagged along with Porsche and Kinn when they went for food even though he knew that would have been traumatizing. Or, hell, he should have convinced Macau to stick around and let them hit up the fair games together. Instead, he'd waved his friend off and wished him good luck when Macau spotted that couple a year ahead of them that he'd been relentlessly flirting with for the past few weeks. Porchay didn't want to know half of what he now knew about them.
He hadn't expected Kim to stick around. In reality, he should have. Tankhun had been the one to convince Kim to come along, glittery eyed and bubbling with excitement as he talked about it. Kim had agreed slowly with his eyes tracking Porchay. Porchay didn't want to admit to himself that he'd stayed in Kim's line of vision just to see how long Kim would watch him for. Longer than expected was the answer.
Kim said nothing back, though his eyes darted from Porchay to the crowd around them. He wondered, briefly, if Kim was remembering the same night Porchay was. Their fair date almost eight months ago where Kim had won him a stuffed cat that lived in a box on top of Porchay's closet because he couldn't bring himself to part with it. He'd been so impressed with Kim's dart throwing skills. He'd now seen a video of Kim throwing knives with terrifying precision that left Porchay stunned and hot.
He hoped, based on the little smile on Kim's face, that he was remembering the same night with fondness.
"Thank you," he said again. His eyes dropped down to Kim's arm, the one that had just recently been wrapped around him for the first time in months, and he had to take a steadying breath before he met Kim's eyes again.
"Didn't want to lose you in the crowd," Kim said. Porchay felt the warmth bloom in his chest again. It was always there, automatic and ready to make itself known whenever Kim's attention was on him. It had been almost half a year, and while Porchay had worked his way through the hurt, he'd yet to actually be able to get over Kim. And then Kim would look at him like he cared and Porchay would just stumble back down into the abyss of feelings.
"I want food," he said instead of everything else going through his head. Instead of please love me the way he'd wanted to say so many times in the past few months. He turned on his heal and look over the crowd for Tankhun's sparkly jacket. At some point in the last few minutes, the trio they'd been tagging along with disappeared into the crowd leaving just Kim and Porchay.
Great. That was… great.
It wasn't like Kim had been all that far away from Porchay all evening. He'd followed Porchay to every booth, a silent shadow in their crowd. He'd been mostly able to ignore it while they'd had the distraction of the others as it was happening.
Okay, he could handle this. He still wanted food, and if he was stuck with Kim, well, that was that. They'd find someone else eventually and be able to team up. He just needed something else to focus on. Anything else. Food. Food would be perfect. Without saying anything Porchay simply turned and headed towards the chicken satay food truck. He could feel Kim following behind him, could feel Kim's eyes on him as they waited in line. When they finally got their skewers - Kim had ordered, and beat Porchay into paying - he stepped aside from the line to hand half to Porchay.
"You want to watch the fireworks, right," Kim asked. He was still so close to Porchay and had been keeping step with him. Every time Porchay moved, Kim was right there moving with him. They'd made there way through a long strip of the market booths that way while eating their chicken.
"Yeah," Porchay said. "It's why I wanted to come here. They should be starting soon and -". Kim didn't want for Porchay to finish his sentence. His hand wrapped around Porchay's arm again, and Porchay's words cut off as he was led through the crowd towards the water. They were moving further and further away from where they'd last seen Tankhun and the others. He should maybe be looking for them, but, well, Kim's hand on him was warm, and Kim's eyes compelling. He had wanted Kim's attention for so long that it was hard to imagine willingly shaking if off now that he had it.
Kim paused for a moment, and Porchay watched him analyze the area around them. They were in the middle of the crowd closing in on the water. It would be hard to get much closer, though Porchay would love to see the fireworks reflecting off the river. Then, the hand that had been warm on his arm shifted and linked their fingers together. It was static in Porchay's mind as he looked down at their hands. They fit together the same way they always had. Kim's with chipped nail polish and Porchay's somehow larger than his.
"The lights, right?" Kim asked as his grip tightened. "Come on, let's find you a spot." Porchay watched, mouth open in confusion, in oncoming protest. Kim didn't give him the time to gather his thoughts. He just pushed through the crowd and pulled Porchay along with him.
Porchay pushed all of his questions away and watched Kim with confusion and curiosity.
The crowd milled around them, half shouted conversations overheard among the masses and the music. Porchay couldn't focus on any of that. The only thing he noticed was Kim's hand still in his own. Kim looking back to smile at him. Kim stopping near the fencing, somehow maneuvering in enough space for both of them if they pressed close together. Kim.
He could feel the rapid pattering of his heart as he pressed close and safe to Kim's side. It somehow felt like they were alone, just the two of them watching each other, even as they were surrounded by thousands of people waiting for the fireworks to start.
He wanted to ask why. Why now. Why here. What was going on?
He didn't ask any of that, just turned his attention to the fireworks when they started.
There was a loud crack of fireworks as Kim leaned over and said "I'm sorry," right into Porchay's ear. He glanced over - confused, surprised - and met Kim's eyes as another round of fireworks went off over head. "I'm sorry," Kim said again. "I lied when I said I didn't love you. I didn't know how to keep you safe, l still don't, but I want you and that matters more."
Porchay blinked away tears, the ones that had come immediately, and knew his smile was probably wobbly as he took in the earnest look on Kim's face. Then, still feeling shaky, he leaned down to kiss Kim. He didn't know when he'd become taller than the other man, but at some point in the last few months, their roles had reversed. No longer was he reaching up to embrace Kim, to kiss his cheek, to press his face into Kim's neck.
Kissing Kim always felt like an explosion, his whole body lighting up at once. The first brush of lips was soft, careful, an apology in touch, before Kim's fingers tighten around his. It doesn't stay soft for long before Kim's hand lifted to Porchay's face, curved around his chin and dragging him into another more heated kiss.
When they pull apart, still pressed together, they glanced up at the fireworks that were still lighting up the sky. Porchay had come here for a reason, after all, and while Kim hadn't been it, he was the best prize Porchay could have won.