Chapter Text
Prologue
“The storyteller? He keeps telling stories… But… there’s a story he can never tell… or at least, not the real story…”
That phrase resonated in Mike’s head while looking at his D&D binder and holding a million tears that could make his heart explode at any given time.
He knew what was never going to be told. He knew what he meant at that exact moment while looking at him in the eyes… But he was never going to admit that… or at least that’s what he thought. Because how could it possibly be that even…? It had been 18 months since Eleven decided to sacrifice herself, and he thought he was going to be in so much pain because of that, but in reality, the pain that had been burdening him all this time wasn’t only because of that. That pain had started the day he heard that phrase:
“I had this crush on someone…even though I know they’re not like me…but it was never about him…it was about me.”
How could he have been so stupid? How was he able to retain all those feelings in a bottle for so long? Even so, how could he do this to El while she decided to leave everything behind? How could he not even tell her that he loved her too, even though he knew it was not love as she expected?
All those questions were left unanswered as soon as he closed the basement door.
At least Holly got to do something fun for the rest of her childhood…at least Vecna was finally gone, right? What could possibly be worse than having to deal with evil beings from other dimensions? Well, when he had to sit beside Will at the dinner table to eat lasagna, and he didn’t look at him, not even once, he knew.
That was worse.
Much worse than any evil wizard from another dimension.
Mike was going to lose him.
“Thank you, Mrs. Wheeler!” Lucas yelled while preparing to go outside.
Will watched him walk away as he picked up his sweater from the living room sofa.
“Thank you for the food! It was delicious!” Dustin smiled.
“Thank you!” Max stared at him while yelling. “I’ll wait for you, sorcerer.”
Will rolled his eyes and giggled.
Max had been like that for the past 18 months. Will didn’t know how, but she had figured that it had been Mike all along. I mean, it was pretty damn obvious, and Will was sure everyone knew that except Mr. Paladin. Nevertheless, that had been long ago, or so he liked to believe. He was certain he could get over all his feelings for Mike and leave everything behind, but that feeling was still lingering somewhere within the clouds and the moon. If Will really wanted to do it, to be free from everything he felt, he was going to need to do something more. He didn’t want to, but his plans were already done.
“Goodbye, Mrs. and Mr. Wheeler! Thank you for everything.” He smiled. His hands were trembling as his eyes wandered through that house one last time. He was about to leave for good without even glancing at him when…
“Will”
Will stopped dead in his tracks. Mike’s voice reached his ears like a soft touch, making him shiver. His heart was pounding like a drum, but he couldn't let him hear it. He turned around, not without grabbing his bike first, ready to cycle at full speed if he had to.
“Mike?” his voice sounded raspy. Damn it.
“Hey, um...” Mike swallowed hard, and his eyes couldn't even meet Will's after that moment in the basement just an hour ago.
Will knew Mike had been having a really hard time. There had been many long nights throughout the year and a half, when he would come to the cabin to stay in his room, tears streaming down his face, words barely coming out. Then, as time went by, the distance between them began to grow. Will watched every minute in slow motion, as Mike drifted away from him. He knew Mike needed his space, so he didn’t try harder, and now Will wanted to do the same, no matter what that meant.
“Hey, Will!” Max shouted, waiting for him a few feet away, already on her bike.
Will took a deep breath.
“Go ahead, I'm coming,” he began to get on his bike when Mike put his hand on one of the handlebars. “What's up...?” he let a deep sigh leave his mouth, almost sounding annoyed. He didn’t mean that.
“I- I know I've been really distant this year...” Mike seemed to choke on his own words. Will couldn’t help but feel saddened. “But I really wanted to tell you-”
“You don't have to say anything. I understand.” Will cut his words before he could say anything else. He didn’t want to hear it. He didn’t want to keep living on excuses, hoping for something to eventually change between them. He was sure that was never going to happen anyway. He didn’t want to linger on that feeling. Not anymore. “I miss her too.”
He couldn't even imagine the pain Mike was feeling since Jane had decided to leave everything, and everyone, behind. Sure, Will could still see her in his dreams, and his heart ached every time he thought about what could have been if he had realized her intentions. Jane was his sister. He loved her… But nothing came close to what Mike must be going through because, after all, Will knew she was his everything. Jane, El, Eleven… she was Mike’s everything.
Mike's eyes finally met his, and a sharp pain shot through Will's chest. How could he even think about hugging him? How could he still be in love despite everything? It was unfair to Mike. It was unfair to Jane. It was unfair to himself. He had to let him go.
“Hm...yeah…” Mike took a breath. Will was sure there was so much that he wanted to say, he could tell. Mike was a hard stone; he always had been, so he was willing to wait until he said it, but instead he just whispered, “See you tomorrow?”
Will hesitated.
For a very long time, they had both thought about a future where they could still be close to each other. They had thought about their lives post the Upside Down, and Will had made innumerable scenarios in his mind. Still, Will didn't think that could happen. Not anymore.
Will hadn't even told Mike his real plans for college. Mike was still thinking there was a possibility that they could be roommates if they both got to the university they applied to together, or that they would still meet on campus, but Will had been eyeing other options… for his own good. For Mike’s own good, too, he liked to believe. For the first time, Will wanted to hold onto that selfishness and think about protecting himself. His heart.
It was killing him inside, but it was better this way. Only by ripping off the band-aid quickly would Will finally be able to move on, even though leaving Mike behind hurt him more than anything else in the world.
“Um... I don't think so, Mike...”
Mike's eyebrows arched questioningly. Damn, why was he so adorable?
“Jonathan- he... wanted to take me to an exhibition or something.”
Lie.
Lie.
Mike felt as if a thousand swords had pierced him. He knew that wasn't true; he knew Jonathan had made plans with Nancy and the others because he had heard about it; that’s all Nancy had been talking about with their parents. He knew this was Will avoiding him. It started a few weeks ago, and it was killing him.
He knew it was his fault. He had somehow pushed him away while trying to sort his crap out. So he couldn’t blame him. But shit, it was drowning him.
“Oh. Sure, I understand...” He couldn't even look him in the eye anymore; he started pinching his wrist.
“But I'll see you another day, okay?”
Something in Will's tone gave him hope, but he couldn't help noticing his body language... Will wanted to get out of there right then and there. It was obvious that their relationship was no longer the same as before, and that scared him so much. He didn't want to leave Will. He didn’t want Will to leave him. Mike just needed time to figure out what the hell was in his heart, since he didn't understand it himself. However, he knew that, at some point, it was too unfair to force him to stay by his side while this was happening.
Mike nodded.
The tears welled up in his eyes, and the lump in his throat was enough to suffocate him.
He decided to take one last look at him, and God, he wished he hadn't. Seeing Will's small, beautiful smile at that moment was enough to make him regret everything he hadn't been able to say. Regret every moment he didn’t spend by his side.
“Bye, Mike.”
Those were the last words Will said to him. And Mike knew, he knew he had lost him. He knew he had ruined everything.