Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter 1

There’s a jagged black scar across the front door of the Wheeler’s house.

Mike, Will, Jonathan and Nancy pause on the front step, staring at it.

“That’s where Eleven went through, after Holly” Nancy says softly, like she’s re-living the moment. It’s the first time any of them have been back here since the attack on their parents, since Holly’s kidnapping.

It’s almost too surreal to think only two days have passed.

Mike reaches out, rubbing a finger on the black line – its slightly raised against the bright white of the wood, but solid. The gate is closed now. This stain is all that remains, a reminder of how fragile their reality really is. How easily Vecna can take and take and take from them, until nothing is left. His brow furrows.

Mike breaks the police tape and opens the door. The four of them enter the quiet house, shoes squishing into the soft carpet. Nancy glances toward the kitchen briefly, then bolts upstairs to her room. Jonathan gives Mike and Will a look and follows her up.

Leaving them alone.

Mike takes a few steps towards the kitchen as Will watches him, cautiously. Ever since he…said what he said, he’s felt the uncertainty bubbling back up inside him. He thought that saying it out loud, reducing it to “just a crush” would help, would snuff out the heat of how he really feels. He thought by saying it, he could make it real. But its somehow worse than ever before. Coming so close to revealing his secrets and then holding back has had the opposite effect – they feel harder to hide now.

He told one secret, but there are more.

He watches Mike take it in. The deep brown stain of dried blood smeared on the floor, the jagged sparkle of broken glass on the linoleum.

The warm overhead light is catching in Mike’s dark curls and Will reminds himself that he shouldn’t be admiring how beautiful he looks, he should be focused on how Mike is feeling right now. His Mom, Dad, Holly. He can’t imagine how Mike is coping with so much loss all at once. He hasn’t even cried. Mike the Brave.

He can only see the back of Mike’s head, can’t see his face or read his expression, but he can feel the tension in Mike’s body. He’s standing there, looking at the aftermath, holding himself rigid, like he’s holding something in. Mike has always been good at this. Compartmentalizing.

He turns and Will catches a fleeting, rare shine in Mike’s eyes.

“I’m gonna… take a shower,” Mike says, flatly. And he pushes up the stairs leaving Will alone in the entrance.

With a clear view of the kitchen, he sees the damage. The violence. It tears at him. He flashes back to what it felt like, what it feels like to be inside a demo. The cold instinctive drive of an animal mind, hunting because Vecna told it to. Thank God he didn’t have to witness this attack firsthand. To be the one hurting the Wheelers.

He backs away and heads to the basement, his “room” in the Wheeler’s house. He feels strangely lost, out of place here in the normalcy of Mike’s basement after everything that’s happened.

He can’t quite wrap his head around how much has changed so fast.

He’s got powers. He’s killed. He’s faced Vecna, alone. And yet…he’s somehow more afraid than ever. Afraid of what’s coming. He put on a brave face at the Squawk. He wants to be ready, to help fight. But the doubt is creeping back in slowly, like the Mind Flayer once did.

It was weird having everyone there, people he barely knows, even Murray of all people, but since no one had any idea what he was going to tell them, they took “everyone” literally and filled the room before he could protest.

It went… better than he expected? His brother, his mom, the boys, Eleven, Robin. Even Max. They all understood, hugged him.

But Mike. He joined in the group hug but Will felt the hesitation. He felt it. There was a change, however subtle, in how Mike looked at him, touched him. And that change opened up a gap in his armour, a place for the doubts, for Vecna to crawl back in.

Will looks around the room, walks to the corner where photos and D&D maps are tacked to a board on the wall, beside their binders. A photo of him and Mike, when they were younger, before the Upside Down, before the Mind Flayer, before… Eleven. The years feel like they’ve flown by.

How did we get here so fast?

Will focuses on a photo of him and Mike in their D&D character costumes. Will is in his “Will the Wise” purple and Mike is wearing a cardboard breastplate. The Paladin. The Heart. Mike the Brave. Will wishes he could have been braver.

He just…couldn’t say it in front of everyone. He couldn’t take Mike rejecting him on top of it all, so he chickened out. Held back. Said the other thing. Diminished it. And somehow made it feel like even bigger of a secret.

He knows what Vecna does with secrets.

He heads to the small bathroom here in the basement. Turns the water on and strips off his dirty clothes. There’s no shower down here but he can at least wipe the grime from his skin. He looks in the mirror – startled by his own reflection. He feels like he’s aged a year in just the past few days. There are bags under his eyes, with small, popped blood vessels around them, probably from when he infiltrated Vecna’s mi- No. Don’t think about that.

Vecna’s mind is a place of shadows. He sees the world through a lens of pain and torment. Will shudders remembering what it’s like to be inside a mind like that.

He swallows, remembering the vines wrapping around him, immobilizing him.

Even though the vines weren’t real, he can almost see the bruises on his neck. He wipes his neck with the warm washcloth and it’s just dirt, a trick of the light.

He splashes water on his face, through his hair, the water trickling down his forehead and cheeks. The water pressure changes suddenly and he realizes Mike must be having his shower upstairs.

Will closes his eyes and runs his hands under the tap for a moment, imagining he’s in the shower with – No. That’s stupid. It can never happen. That was the point of today’s confession. To let it go. To move forward.

He turns the tap off, slamming it a little too hard with his palm. And its suddenly as if he’s back there, standing in front of the sink at home, when he first coughed up a piece of the Upside Down. When the nightmare followed him home.

He’s going back in there tomorrow, for the first time since he was taken.

He jerks back and retreats from the bathroom quickly, finding clean clothes and making up his mattress on the floor. That’s the whole reason they’re here, to get a good night’s sleep. After all, they’re going to save the world tomorrow.

Or they might all die.

His stomach growls and he realizes he has no idea when he last ate. It’s too early to go to bed yet anyways.

He creeps back up the stairs, finds a broom and starts sweeping up the glass in the kitchen, making a safe path. Being useful.

“You don’t have to do that Will,” says Jonathan, gently, from the hall. Will looks up and Jonathan has changed clothes too, though there’s still a bit of gunk in his hair. He takes the broom from Will and finishes sweeping.

“I’m really proud of you-” “Thanks for being-“ They both blurt simultaneously, then laugh.

Jonathan, eldest, continues, “Y’now, I had kinda figured it out, but I know it means something to say it out loud yourself. And.. I’m just so proud of you.”

“Thanks,” Will blushes a bit, but he can tell the pride in Jonathan’s voice is genuine.

The best big brother anyone could ask for.

“Do you feel better?” Jonathan asks.

“Yeah. Yeah, I guess so.” Will admits, but there’s a hesitation. Jonathan picks up on it.

“I’m sorry it was so…there were so many people there. If I’d known what you were gonna tell us, I would’ve said someth-“

“It’s not your fault Jonathan. It’s fine. It happened the way it was supposed to happen, I guess.”

Will gets a far-off look in his eyes, like he’s re-living it, replaying what he said. Jonathan grips his shoulder, bringing him back to the present.

“Hey, if there’s anything else. It’s just us now and you know I’m here for you.”

“I know. I think I-” Will starts.

Somehow, even with the invitation to share more, Will can’t quite bring himself to open up. This is Jonathan and Will knows he wouldn’t judge him but saying it out loud still feels too scary.

Will’s eyes flick to the fridge, just for a split second, landing on a photo of the Mike tacked up there.

Jonathan doesn’t even need to turn his head. He knows. Will sees it in his eyes.

“It’ll be ok Will. Let’s just get through the end of the world first, ok?” Jonathan reassures him.

Will relaxes. He didn’t even say it out loud, but he feels better. Seen.

Nancy suddenly rounds the corner holding a cleaning bottle and a sponge. With the glass out of the way, in characteristic Nancy fashion, she focuses on the problem at hand. She attacks the bloodstain on the floor, trying to wipe the violence away, even if the memory still haunts them.

Jonathan finishes scooping up the glass and it becomes clear Nancy is crying softly as she scrubs the linoleum. Jonathan approaches her, takes the sponge from her hand and finishes it for her. She calms a little.

Will feels terrible. Awkward. He doesn’t want to intrude but feels like he should apologize. He flashes again to the memory of what it’s like being the demo.

“I-I’m so sorry Nancy,” he says weakly.

“Will no. You warned us. I might not have gotten here in time if it wasn’t for you. You can’t blame yourself,” Nancy gets up from the floor and hugs him. Will realizes it’s the first time he and Nancy have ever hugged but it feels nice, gentle, like what it might be like to have an older sister.

With the blood and glass gone, the kitchen almost feels normal again.

Jonathan opens the fridge and pulls out some leftovers. They spread them across the kitchen island and eat the food cold, in a contemplative silence.

Nancy and Jonathan look exhausted and Will realizes he has no idea what happened to them in the Upside Down. He sees them share a look, and suddenly feels like an intruder. He mumbles a hasty excuse and heads back to the basement.

A moment later, Mike enters the kitchen holding a navy blue pillow in his arms, looking a little lost. He notices the food on the counter, the clean floor.

“Will swept up the glass,” Nancy explains.

Mike’s lips press together in a line and he swallows.

“Can I have some?” He gestures to the food and Nancy passes him a container with some leftover roast beef in it.

“I’m going to shower next, try to get some of this gunk out of my hair,” Nancy announces, and she heads upstairs again, pressing a hand to Jonathan’s shoulder on her way out.

Jonathan smiles watching her go and he and Mike are left standing on opposite ends of the kitchen, awkwardly. Jonathan breaks the silence first.

“Your room looks like it was hit by a tornado,” he says.

An understatement.

“Yeah. I don’t think I can sleep in there. I was gonna take the Lay-Z-Boy.”

“Why don’t you take the couch downstairs?”

Mike grins a little, “So you and Nance can have some privacy?”

Jonathan smiles. “No, Nancy and I broke up.”

Mike almost spits out his mouthful of food, “What! When?”

“In the Upside Down.”

Mike sputters.

“It’s ok – we had a good talk, about all the things we’ve been keeping from each other. Almost dying makes it a lot easier to tell the truth, y’now?”

He and Mike make eye contact and Jonathan cuts right to it, “Have you talked to him yet?”

Mike swallows. Fidgets with his pillow.

Jonathan crosses the kitchen, puts a gentle hand on Mike’s shoulder.

“I think he’d appreciate it after.. today. Especially from his best friend. Especially before whatever happens tomorrow.”

Jonathan gives Mike a kind smile and a pat on the back before he leaves. Mike can hear the creak of leather as he sits in the Lay-Z-Boy and flips up the footrest, leaving him with the basement as his only option.

He sighs, packs the food back in the fridge, grabs his pillow and walks toward the basement door.

Chapter 2

Will should sleep but he can’t relax. He’s sitting on the couch, staring at the wall, trying to sort his feelings out. They haven’t talked since the Squawk. Should he – go up to Mike’s room and ask to talk to him? It feels far too bold. Mike is probably already asleep anyways.

Or you’re afraid he doesn’t want to talk to you.

He’s fighting it, trying not to remember what Vecna showed him. But the harder he tries not to think about it, the more the thoughts invade his mind. He shivers, suddenly cold, and remembers that music helps keep Vecna away if you focus on it.

He stands, walks to a cassette player and pops in the first cassette he finds. It’s one of Will’s mix tapes – he used to bring them here all the time, to try and get Mike into the music he liked. A Bowie song starts to play, softly, and Will sits back on the couch, bouncing his knee, restless.

I’m afraid to go to sleep. That’s what’s lurking under the restlessness.

Now that he knows Vecna can use him while he’s sleeping, to build, to grow his plans, Will doesn’t want to give him that weapon.

He calms a little now that he’s figured it out, what’s been bothering him. He likes feeling defiant against Vecna – like he can actually do something. Even if it’s just…not sleeping.

There’s a sudden CREAK on the stairs and Will looks up to see Mike standing there. He’s clutching a pillow to his chest, and his curls are still wet from the shower. He’s wearing sweatpants and a rumpled T-shirt and Will’s heart jumps against his chest. He’s never looked more beautiful.

“Hey,” he says.

“Hey”

“Uh, Jonathan said I could come sleep down here, if that’s ok with you?” He sounds unsure, withdrawn.

“You don’t want to sleep in your room?” Will asks, instantly regretting it. Of course he wants Mike to sleep here. Why even suggest an alternative?

“Uh, my room is kinda… destroyed. It looks like the demo crashed right through my wall, blew my whole closet apart. And there’s…blood on the carpet. It’s a mess up there.”

He sounds a bit shaken, like the violence being in his bedroom is more violating than the fact of his parent’s injuries. It’s unusual for Mike to be so fazed, but Will knows what that feels like, to feel like your own home isn’t safe anymore.

“Of course. I’m sorry Mike that sounds awful.”

Silence stretches between them as neither knows quite what to say.

“You might have to fight Jonathan for the couch,” Will jokes, keeping things light.

“I think – I think he and Nancy are gonna spend the night, y’now, together. Last night and all.” Mike lies, though Will doesn’t know that.

Will swallows. Of course. Kinda obvious now that Mike said it. And I get to spend my last night with Mike. His heart beats a little faster.

“Right. Duh. Lovebirds. End of the world.”

Mike looks like he’s about to say something else, then changes his mind.

“Good song,” he says, pointing to the cassette player still humming softly in the background.

“Yeah? I wasn’t sure if you liked anything on this tape,” Will says.

“I love it. You have good taste in music. Really good.”

I love it. Will flushes a little, but it’s dim enough that Mike seems not to notice.

The song ends and another starts playing, It’s “Just Like Heaven” by The Cure.

                Show me, show me, show me how you do that trick

They stand there awkwardly and Will suddenly realizes Mike is still gripping his pillow, waiting for him to move.

“Oh, sorry. All yours,” he says as he moves off the couch, making space for Mike to make his bed.

Without a word, Mike tosses his pillow down, grabs a folded blanket and spreads it across the couch. Will sits on his mattress and watches. He can still see the tension in Mike’s body, the way he’s holding himself together so tightly, like if he lets go, even for a second, he’ll break down completely.

              I promise that I'll run away with you

He swallows. This song is so intimate with just Mike and the pregnant silence in the room. He suddenly wants to turn it off.

“You wanna get some sleep? Should I turn it off?” Will moves to the cassette player before Mike can answer the question.

              Why won't you ever know that I'm in love with you? That I'm in love with-

Will presses STOP on the player, cutting it off mid-lyric. His heart is pounding. Why did he have to get up right at that line in the song. It feels like a confession. That I’m in love with you rings in his ears like a bell.

He sits back down. The light is still on, a lamp beside Mike, and Will isn’t brave enough to get closer to him to turn it off.

Mike is looking at the floor, like all of a sudden he can’t make eye contact with Will.

Will swallows a lump in his throat. This is what he was most afraid of. Mike’s reaction. He shouldn’t have said anything about a crush. Maybe he shouldn’t have said anything at all. They’re about to go into their biggest fight yet and… he feels like he’s already lost his best friend. He starts to worry this is exactly what Vecna wanted. To weaken him, them, before battle.

That thought emboldens him just a little and he asks the question he’s been afraid to ask before he can second-guess himself again.

“Are we…ok? “Will asks.

Mike looks up from the floor, sees Will looking at him.

“Of course. Of course. We’re cool.” Mike says quickly. He looks away, breaking Will’s gaze.

Stupid. I should have just left it alone.

“You’re right. Big day tomorrow. We should probably get some sleep. Ok if I turn this off?”

And he flicks off the light before Will can answer, the same as Will did with the music.

It’s the abruptness of it. The way Mike shut it down before they could even start. Will’s stomach drops and he mutters, “Goodnight Mike.”

A moment later, in the darkness, he hears a quiet, “Goodnight Will.”

Chapter 3

Will is back in the Upside Down – he’s running between the dead gray trees, dodging twisting black vines, coughing and choking on the spores in the air, searching frantically for Mike.

“Miiike! Mike where are you?”

He panics when he sees a shape on the ground ahead of him. The shape is familiar. He runs up to find Mike laying on the ground. Cold. His eyes are open, blank, just like that body in Stand By Me. An ugly red slash across his chest that is alarmingly dark and wet.

Will drops to his knees, hard, tries to shake Mike out of it, shake him awake. He has to be just sleeping, just last night they were sleeping in the basement… he can’t lose him today. Not like this. Not right after…

Will lets out a gulping, guttural sob as he holds Mike’s body.

“Mike no, Mike no. Mike please,” he chokes out between sobs.

“Will! Will, can you hear me?”

Its Mike’s voice. But when Will looks down he’s still looking at a corpse. Where is the sound coming from?

“Will, wake up. Come on!”

Will suddenly opens his eyes, screaming. He finds himself in the familiar basement and Mike is sitting next to him on the floor, hands on Will’s shoulders.

“Will! Are you ok? Did Vecna try to take you again? I’m here, ok?” Mike is talking too fast and Will, still foggy from sleep, can’t quite put the pieces together yet, what’s real and what’s not. It felt so real.

“Mike? Mike, are you ok? You’re not dead?” Will says frantically as he sits up, tears streaming down his face.

Mike’s eyes widen with shock and understanding as he grabs Will, wrapping his arms around him in a tight hug.

“I’m not dead Will, I’m right here, ok? I’ve got you. I’ve got you.”

Will realizes he had a nightmare, that he woke up screaming Mike’s name and that Mike is here, safe, alive.

He grips Mike back and they hold each other tightly as Will slowly calms down, the tears drying on his cheeks as he gets his breathing under control. Will loses himself in the sensation of a hug with no awkward feelings attached to it.

And as soon as he’s thought it, he stiffens, just a little. And Mike pulls back.

“What happened? You were shouting my name and I…”

“It had to be him. Trying to weaken me. It’s...what he showed me before,” Will admits.

“He showed you…me? Dead?” Mike asks.

He took you away, forever.

Will covers his face and nods as Mike sits back and takes this in.

He touches Will’s bare arm and it’s like a jolt of electricity.

“God, you’re freezing,” Mike says.

He likes it cold.

Will shivers with fear, tears brimming in his eyes again. Panic rising in his chest.

“Don’t let him take me again, please Mike. Don’t let him,” Will whispers through chattering teeth, “Please don’t let him take me Mike,” Will keeps repeating like a mantra.

Mike puts his arms around Will again, this time to grab Will’s blanket and wrap it around him. He rubs Will’s arms through the blanket, trying to warm him up.

“I’ve got you Will. Let’s just get you warm, ok?” Mike soothes. He watches Will with so much concern in his face. All the awkwardness from earlier gone. Will remembers the last time Mike was like this. When the Mind Flayer was creeping in. He stayed right by Will’s bed the whole night.

The tears spill over Will’s cheeks and he crashes into Mike again, gripping him tightly as he keeps repeating, “Please don’t let him take me again Mike, please Mike.”

Mike holds him tightly, the rock that Will needs as he slowly calms. He’s still shivering, even under the blanket and Mike’s added body heat.

As the tears dry on his cheeks, Mike pulls away, slowly, determination on his face.

“I won’t let him. I won’t. Ok? I think we should get under the blanket, like when someone has hypothermia? You need body heat to get warm, Will,” Mike explains. And Will can’t help the twisting, guilty feeling in his chest, how badly he wants to be close to Mike, but not for superficial, practical reasons like preventing hypothermia.

“Ok,” Will submits quietly.

They lay down together on Will’s tiny mattress and Mike pulls the blanket over them both, careful to tuck it around Will’s back.

He starts to pull Will’s shirt up and Will jumps.

“What are you doing?”

“Skin-to-skin contact is the most efficient way to warm you up Will,” Mike states, matter-of-fact.

God he’s so oblivious it pains Will.

Will allows him to pull the shirt up, exposing his back and stomach, but he doesn’t let Mike remove it altogether. He needs some small barrier to remain between them or he’ll go crazy.

We’ll go crazy together.

Mike then lifts his own shirt up and presses close to Will, wrapping him in his arms so their chests are pressed together.

“The core is the most important,” Mike states. It’s like he’s reading from a damn textbook and Will suddenly resents how easy it is for Mike to do this, to touch him without it meaning anything.

No secret crush weighing down every word, every action.

Will is still shivering and he starts to focus on the warmth radiating from Mike. His body is like a furnace – he has no idea what it’s like to run so hot. And it feels… incredible.

His resentment melts away and he’s suddenly grateful that Mike feels so comfortable like this, holding him close. Mike’s lack of baggage starts to relax Will. He lets go of the tension he’s holding, that’s keeping him trembling and finally relaxes into Mike’s arms.

He’s my best friend. I’m lucky to have a friend like Mike. This is… enough. Will tries to focus on these thoughts.

The shivering slows and he starts to be able to breathe normally.

“It’s ok Will, I’ve got you. I’ve got you.”

It’s something he’s said more times than Will can count in the years of their friendship and it always makes Will feel so safe. Mike the Brave. Mike the Protector. Will hates being babied by the others, but he secretly loves it when its Mike protecting him. Mike has always gotten a pass.

He wants to tell him that, tell him something about how much he means to Will, but he can’t find the words because the ones he really wishes he could say are too big in his throat. I love you Mike.

It’s impossible. He knows it. So he settles for this. Closeness with a lie buried inside it.

He’s afraid of what will happen if Vecna latches on to this lie.

“You were really brave today Will,” Mike suddenly whispers in the darkness.

His mouth is so close to Will’s ear he almost imagines he heard it. But Mike continues.

“It must have been so… scary. To admit that in front of everyone.”

Will can’t believe Mike is actually addressing it, finally, while their bodies are pressed so close, skin touching skin. He realizes he’s holding his breath and lets it out. He doesn’t know how to respond.

“Will the Brave.”

Will shudders hearing Mike say it that way. He’s grateful Mike doesn’t realize it’s not the cold that’s making him shiver, and instead he pulls Will closer, to share his body heat.

 “Anyway, I just.. wanted to tell you that I’m really… happy for you,” Mike whispers again.

They both stay silent after that, slowly warming up, holding each other tightly, the night before what might be the end of the world and… it’s enough for Will.

“Thanks Mike,” Will whispers back.

He finally relaxes into Mike’s arms and drifts back into sleep.

Chapter 4

Will wakes with a breath. The faintest early morning light is just starting to peek through the curtains. Will can feel it, but he doesn’t open his eyes yet. He starts to move, to stretch his limbs and becomes aware of a new sensation. His hand – someone is holding his hand. His eyes flash open and he remembers. Mike.

Mike slept beside him after the nightmare, to warm him up, to stay close in case Vecna tried to come for him again. And now, miraculously, Mike is… holding his hand.

Their hands aren’t just touching, their fingers are intertwined. It feels.. on purpose.

Their bodies are a few inches apart, their hands the only point of contact between them.

Will steals another glance at Mike’s face. He looks so beautiful when he’s asleep – the morning light is starting to glint in his dark curly hair. His lips parted just slightly, breathing softly. The curls have fallen into his eyes and Will fights the urge to brush them out of the way, to get a better look. He drinks in the details of Mike’s face at this proximity, trying to memorize it.

He’s holding my hand.

It’s all he can think about and Will is frozen in place. Zings of electricity are dancing up his arm through his fingers, where they make contact with Mike’s. And all he can think is at least I’ll have this. He never wants it to end.

THUMP.

A sound from above – Nancy or Jonathan must be awake, maybe making breakfast. Will doesn’t want to move, not until Mike does and he has to let go of this perfect, tiny moment of contact.

He drops his gaze from the ceiling back to Mike’s face and is startled to find Mike’s eyes are open, and he’s looking right at him.

He hasn’t moved his hand.

Even more surprising is Mike doesn’t flinch or look away when Will meets his gaze. It’s a startling shift from last night. The awkwardness is gone. They stare at each other and it’s like a breath is being held between them. A vibrating cord of tension that could break at any moment. But neither of them is making the move to break it.

It builds and builds and finally Mike shifts his hand in Wills.

He draws Will’s fingers closer.

Will’s heart does a somersault and he, tentatively, curls his fingers tighter too. Around Mike’s.

Mike’s mouth curls into a brief smile, just for a moment, but Will sees it.

He’s holding my hand and smiling.

Will can’t quite process it, even though nothing has really happened except a brush of fingers and eye contact. But it feels like a million things have happened in the seconds since he woke up.

“I knew it.”

Will doesn’t know what to make of these words coming out of Mike’s mouth. What? He knew.. what?

“Wh-what?” Will says, tentatively.

“That I was your crush.”

It’s so direct.

Will can’t help it. His eyes widen in disbelief. Not only is Mike holding his hand. He’s apparently aware of Will’s feelings for him AND doesn’t seem bothered? Where’s the awkwardness of yesterday?

Will tries to organize his thoughts into a coherent response but he’s still distracted by Mike’s fingers wrapped around his and only manages to sputter, “How-”  before Mike speaks again.

“I finally put the clues together,” he says.

Mike smiles again.

He smiles.

Will blushes and finally breaks Mike’s gaze, looking down at Mike’s lips briefly before realizing that isn’t a better place to stare and finally looks past Mike at the walls of the basement and the morning light slowly growing along them.

“It’s ok Will.”

“I-its, ok?”

“Yeah.”

Mike tightens his grip on Will’s hand, pulling Will’s eyes back to his.

They hold each other’s gaze again. Mike seems to be looking, really looking, at Will, taking in his features.

“I- I don’t know what to say,” Will finally admits.

“I get that,” Mike says gently.

“What…clues?” Will blushes.

“Besides this?” He squeezes Will’s hand again.

Will can only nod as he suppresses a tiny shudder.

He’s still holding my hand.

“I mean, you practically stared right at me as you said it yesterday at the Squawk. It was kinda obvious, Will.”

Mike smiles playfully and Will can’t help but smile back.

“But last night. Your…nightmare. That’s when it all…clicked,” Mike says gently, suddenly serious, like he doesn’t want to remind Will of the horrible things he saw.

“You told us. You told us that Ve- that he uses your fears, your secrets, against you. And when you told me he made you see me, dead. I knew there had to be a reason he would do that.“

“And after you fell asleep I realized…there's one more secret you haven’t told,” Mike finishes.

Will’s eyes widen. His mind races, about to stumble into a messy explanation.

“The painting,” Mike continues.

The painting?

Will retreats to old lies, “El-“

But Mike cuts him off.

“I know Will. She told me about it in one of her letters. Before I even got to Lenora,”

“She said you were painting it for someone you liked,” Mike continues, “and I just assumed it was someone in Lenora. Until… you gave it to me.”

It’s too much.

Mike knew, he knew the whole time that Will had lied about it. Will flushes with sudden embarrassment. At being found out so easily, for his lame story and believing Mike bought it.

Mike patiently watches him find the words.

“I- I’m sorry,” Will mumbles, “I didn’t mean to lie.”

“Friends don’t lie,” but Mike is still smiling. He doesn’t seem angry.

“But I understand why you did. You had this huge…secret. And I was so focused on finding El,”

He continues, “I know I should have said something. After we got back. Things just got so crazy with the rifts and then quarantine and then it felt like I left it too long and I didn’t know if you even wanted to talk about it. I thought… I thought maybe you’d tell me when you were ready. Or maybe it was a different painting and I was just imagining it.”

It tumbles out of him in a rush and Mike takes a deep breath. His thumb is caressing tiny nervous circles on Will’s hand and its distracting.

“And, I don’t know. The months went by and we got so focused on the mission, I feel like I lost you. Again. And I know that’s on me. I should have asked, I should have made you feel safe enough to tell me. Without an audience.”

Will can’t comprehend what is happening. Mike is comforting him about his feelings for Mike. This was a secret Will thought he could bury, hide away in the dark forever. And now Mike is telling him he knew, and its ok.

“We used to tell each other everything,” Mike says, and a note of sadness creeps into his voice.

Will looks at Mike, sees tears shining in his eyes suddenly.

“I have to… tell you something too,” Mike says as a tear tumbles out of his left eye and onto the pillow they’re sharing.

Will holds his breath. Afraid of what Mike is going to say, but also longing for it. Hoping it will be the words he’s always dreamed but never admitted, even to himself, that he wants to hear from Mike.

I like you too.

“I-“ Mike falters, “I don’t know how to say this.” Will has never seen Mike so flustered.

“I’m not going anywhere,” Will reassures him, “take your time.”

“Eleven.. “

And Will deflates.

Oh.

Eleven. Of course. He loves her. He loves HER. Not me.

“El and I broke up,” he says, all in one exhale.

Will’s heart leaps and he feels suddenly guilty for it.

Mike continues, “I think she knew too.”

Will feels terrible. He never wanted to come between them. He tried so hard to help them find each other again, even though it hurt him to do it. He should have realized that his lie about the painting would eventually come to light. That it would ruin everything.

“About…me.”

Me?

Will thoughts are a rollercoaster. He’s juggling Mike knowing how he feels, guilt that he might be the reason Mike and Eleven broke up, facing the lie he told Mike and coming out to him and now… What? What does Mike mean?

“What do you mean… you?” Will blurts out.

“She figured it out before I did.”

Now Mike is the one to pull his gaze from Will and flush with embarrassment.

“That I- how’d you put it?... don’t like girls,” Mike finishes, with a shaky breath.

Will’s mind is blown. Mike. Doesn’t. Like. Girls?

His mind races and he’s suddenly replaying every moment in his head again – the looks, the touches, the signals, as Robin put it.

He remembers Mike that day, in the rain. The way those words stung. It’s not my fault you don’t like girls! Mike’s tone had changed immediately after he said it, but the words were still out there and couldn’t be taken back. A chasm between them. And Will had been holding on to them for longer than he realized. It was maybe even why he said it the way he did yesterday.

He remembers Mike finally talking to him in Lenora after El was taken away, apologizing. There was always something about the way Mike spoke to him. Softly, gently. He didn’t talk to anyone else like that. Not even El.

He remembers Mike telling him he could be a sorcerer. His excited grin and the instant shame Will felt when he tried to flirt on purpose for the first time. His cheeks flush just thinking about it.

He remembers all of it, all the times he thought that maybe, just maybe, Mike was looking at him too, but convinced himself he was misreading it.

He can’t believe he had no clue Mike was struggling the same way he was.

“Are you going to say anything?” Mike asks, hesitantly.

Will realizes he’s been in his own head and Mike’s been waiting for a response.

They broke up.

His mind finally settles on this fact. It’s safer than asking about the rest of it. Yet.

“When did you and El…?”

“Pretty soon after we got back.”

This whole time?

“But, you two seem.. the same,” Will half-asks the question he really means Why have you been acting like you’re still together?

“We still love each other. I don’t think that will ever change, but it’s just different now. Maybe more honest. She’s important to me, just like you are. She always will be.”

It comes out in a rush, like Mike has been waiting to say it out loud to make it real for himself. To finally admit to himself that El will always be special to him. Will understands that.

Just like you are.

Will’s been avoiding eye contact and it’s becoming obvious now, with their faces still so close together, their fingers still intertwined. In the rush of so much information he almost forgot he’s still holding hands with Mike through this confession.

“So, what does this… mean?” Will asks, so softly that no one could hear it unless they were inches away from him, like Mike is right now.

He finally locks eyes with Mike again and the silence sits between them like an answer to Will’s question. There’s so much to say, but neither of them is ready to say it.

I love you Mike.

Will imagines what it would be like to finally say these words.

And in a sudden, painful flash he remembers what Vecna showed him if he did. Mike’s face wrinkling in disgust, pushing Will away like he was gross, dirty. Wrong. His fear flickers again, and he holds back. He’s still afraid this could all disappear in a moment. That this is a dream. That somehow Mike doesn’t really mean it. Or that he doesn’t feel that way about Will.

And almost like Mike could hear his thoughts, Mike pulls his hand from Will’s, gently.

Will feels it like an ache. His hand feels suddenly cold. He’d almost gotten used to it, it almost felt normal to be holding hands with Mike Wheeler. Just for a moment.

But to Will’s surprise Mike hasn’t fully let go, he’s just moved his hand somewhere else – he’s sliding it up Will’s bare arm and the electricity is humming along with it, along Will’s arm. Last night their bodies were pressed together and it was neutral, practical. The hand holding felt surreal but strangely calming. This is different.

It feels explosive, full of potential.

Mike’s hand is hot against Will’s skin as he reaches the edge of his t-shirt sleeve. He hesitates. This is all still under the blanket they’re sharing, it’s all still somewhat unreal because neither of them can see it, but if Mike continues, it’s going to crash into reality.

And it does.

Mike slides his hand all the way up to Will’s neck, cradling it, holding him exactly where he usually senses the hive mind. Except the hive mind always feels cold, it gives him goosebumps. Mike’s hand is warm, hot even, against the tender skin of Will’s neck.

They haven’t broken eye contact the entire time and Will can see a mixture of tenderness and heat rising in Mike’s eyes as he holds his neck, a look he never imagined he’d ever see on Mike’s face.

“So, uh, can I kiss you?” Mike asks, suddenly shy.

He grins and bites his lower lip a little. And Will is flabbergasted.

“M-Me?” he sputters, disbelievingly

Mike laughs, but not cruelly. Never cruelly. Rather, it’s like he’s delighted that he could surprise Will in this way. It’s so intimate it makes Will’s heart pound in his chest even harder.

Mike wants to kiss me?

“Yes, you, dummy!”

Will licks his lips self-consciously and.. nods. It’s so subtle that someone else might not have seen it. Except Mike did because he’s studying Will like a hawk.

Mike leans forward, pulling Will toward him at the same time. Its gentle but firm. Decisive.

Will allows himself to be pulled in and Mike’s lips brush against his. It pulls a gasp from Will’s throat before he can help himself and Mike smiles, wider now.

“I got you,” Mike whispers against Will’s mouth before he presses his lips to Wills.

Mike’s hot breath on his lips, those words, right before kissing him, sets off fireworks in Will’s mind and body. He feels a sudden rush of heat radiating through him, his senses on fire, attuned to Mike’s lips against his, Mike’s hand against his cheek, the light pressure on his neck, pulling him closer.

It’s a soft, lingering kiss. Gentle and confident at the same time. Will tentatively opens his mouth to press back into Mike’s lips and then they really start kissing, mouths moving together, exploring, savouring.

Will doesn’t know what to do with his hands. He’s caught between reeling at what’s happening and enjoying every second of it. He tries to hold onto one thing.

Mike is kissing me.

He grabs at the blanket and feels Mike’s warm body underneath it. He reaches up, pressing his hand against Mike’s chest, his heart, and feels it pounding, matching the rhythm in Will’s own ears. They’re both breathing faster now and the kiss is becoming something more, more insistent, as their mouths both open at the same time to kiss each other harder and the timing of it takes both their breaths away.

They lean back from the kiss, not going far, but both breathing heavier now.

Will is trying not to shake, his mind is spinning, his mouth is on fire with the taste of Mike’s lips. All he wants is to reach up and touch Mike’s neck, pull him back into another kiss. But despite the clear evidence in front of him, he hesitates. He doesn’t feel that bold.

“Wow,” Mike says first.

Will is in disbelief.

“Is this real?” he whispers.

Mike tilts his chin, catching Will’s gaze again, “Its real.”

And Will smiles. It’s like a dawn cresting over a horizon, the way it spreads across his face, filling him with a lightness he never knew he could have. Especially with Mike.

Mike’s eyes light up at the sight of it.

“What… happens now?” Will asks, hope creeping in.

Mike furrows his brows. This has always brought butterflies to Will’s stomach. How can Mike look so damn... adorable when he’s concentrating?

“I- don’t know.” Mike finally admits.

It takes the air out of the room a little. Will suddenly feels the weight of the moment. The total shift in reality that has just occurred.

Mike kissed me.

It changes everything between them. Where do they go from here?

“That’s ok,” Will rushes to say.

He wants it to be. He wants to be satisfied with this. With this kiss, with Mike opening up to him. But at the same time he wants more. They could die today and he suddenly, desperately needs to tell Mike how much he loves him. How long he’s loved him. He can’t go into battle with this secret. His mind is screaming at him to just say it. And yet…he still hesitates. Mike speaks first.

“I’m sorry I didn’t say all this last night. I was trying to think. Trying to find the right words. Maybe even trying to convince myself I was wrong or this wasn’t the right time.”

He falters for a moment.

“You were so brave,” Mike whispers.

“You were so brave but…I’m not ready.” It’s so soft, fragile, the way he says it. This is Mike the Brave, admitting defeat, and all Will wants to do is comfort him.

“You are brave Mike, the bravest person I know, and you just told me,” Will reassures him.

He sees the conflict written on Mike’s face. Its Mike now who has dropped eye contact. Tears, real tears, form in his eyes again and he turns his face into the pillow to wipe them away, rather than taking his hand off Will’s neck. This small detail emboldens Will.

“It can…be our secret,” Will offers. He takes a shaky breath and continues, “I don’t mind being your secret Mike. You’ve been mine for so long…I can hold that for you.”

Mike locks eyes with him again and there’s gratitude and a kind of wondrous look on his face.

Shyly, he asks, “How long?” and grins.

Will can’t help but grin back.

“You know-” He bites his tongue before can finish the sentence.

Mike looks at him, longingly, encouragingly. His thumb caresses Will’s cheek and it re-ignites that electric charge in his body.

“I know… what?” Mike prods.

I’m in love with you, right?

Will aches with the need to say it. It will change everything. Even more than it’s already been changed, if that’s possible. These feelings of his, that feel so massive in his chest, like he could burst with it, he almost can’t contain them anymore. Like a balloon filled to the brim with air, stretched to its limit.

“Will please…” Mike pleads, his eyes searching Will’s for confirmation.

The vulnerability of it suddenly pops the balloon. Will can see Mike’s need and answers it.

“You know…I’m in love with you, right?” It comes out with a shuddering breath.

It’s Mike turn to smile with relief, with joy. His face lights up with it, all that darkness and doubt wiped away by Will’s final act of confession.

“Good. ‘Cause I think I- I think I love you too,” Mike stammers, his cheeks flushing red beneath his freckles.

Will’s heart drops through his feet, does a backflip and lands squarely back in his chest.

He can hardly comprehend it. The whole time he’s been hiding his feelings, assuming he never had a chance with his best friend… he secretly felt the same way? It’s too surreal.

But after everything they’ve been through, he believes it. Mike has always been so shy, pent-up with his feelings. It took Will pushing him to tell El he loved her but this – it just leapt from Mike’s lips. Effortlessly. This, more than anything, convinces Will that its real. All of this is real.

He loves Mike and Mike loves him back. He could die happy now. And they might. Today.

This sobering thought rushes through his mind and all the doubt is suddenly gone. He knows what he wants, what he needs. And there’s not enough time to be subtle about it.

He smiles at Mike, letting some of the heat he feels show in his eyes. Mike makes a little noise in the back of his throat. It’s the final piece of encouragement Will needs and he’s doing it.

He moves his hand up to Mike’s face, mirroring Mike’s hand on his own cheek. He brushes the wetness of Mike’s tears away with his thumb and reaches back, to get a grip on Mike’s adorable curls at the back of his neck. Mike gasps as Will tugs on them, gently, with his fingertips.

“So, uh, can I kiss you?” Will asks, knowing the answer already.

He pulls Mike close as Mike whispers again, “Please, Will..”

It’s so soft, so aching…and Will gives in.

Will kisses Mike, deeply, holding nothing back this time. They both dive into it fully, lips moving almost frantically, like they have to drink one another up before it’s too late, before they run out of time.

Mike begins kissing Will’s cheeks, his neck. Mike flicks a wet tongue out on Will’s neck and Will shudders. They’re both making noises, unable to hold back their desire for each other now that it’s been unleashed. It’s like a torrent, a wave that’s built between them for years finally cresting, crashing onto the shore.

Mike laughs, suddenly breathless and they lock eyes again, smiling, before they continue, legs and limbs becoming intertwined under the blanket.

The sunrise is now flooding the room, filling it with golden light and they’re kissing and laughing and in love and no matter what happens today, they’ll always have this to hold onto.

And it’s just like heaven.