Chapter Text
"You don't have to be alone, Max." The words were so genuine, almost scarily raw. Max had never heard Steve that way; she'd never seen him with so much emotion.
It had been 10 months since Max woke up from her coma, and she'd moved in with the Sinclair's. She'd been working tirelessly to regain full mobility, and she'd nearly mastered it. She wasn't back on the skateboard or anything crazy, but she was walking, and she was almost running again. Steve and Max had grown much closer than before. They were always close, but now? Now they were practically siblings. Steve took Max to every one of her physical therapy appointments, and she always offered that she could ask Sue or Nance to take her, but he didn't mind. He enjoyed the time they spent together on those drives, but he didn't want her to ever think he pitied her, or that those times were forced. He enjoyed her company, and he knew that she enjoyed his, even though she was definitely not going to boost his ego by admitting that. He tried to hang out with her as much as he could; he really saw himself in her.
Today, he'd come to the Sinclair's to visit. Max didn't go to her appointment today; he knew something was wrong. He'd gotten the call from Lucas around 10 am telling him that she didn't feel up to it today. It was rare that Max didn't go; she didn't like the physical therapy, but she also didn't like relying on anyone for anything. He used to call her 'red bird,' which slowly became a simple 'red.' She was a bird; she was never one to be held down. She was strong as hell, and she wasn't going to let anyone or anything stop her from her independence. Maybe that was why Lucas and her were so good for each other, they didn't depend on each other. They needed each other, but they both had an unspoken understanding that they would never hold each other down.
Steve and Max sat on the front porch of the house. Steve brought her a slushy from 7/11, her favorite flavor of course, blue raspberry. The employees there basically knew the two by name; they came in there after every appointment. Steve knew that a lot of the time, that one little gesture was one of the best parts of those days. He wasn't going to show up at her house empty-handed, especially when he was pretty sure she wasn't doing great.
"I'm fine, Steve. Really, you've got to quit worrying."
"I know you're not fine, Max. I'm not losing you again. You're not gonna leave me with the rest of these dumbasses again." His words were still raw, but he was trying to soften the intensity by making a joke out of it. That's what Steve was good at doing, what he'd always been good at doing. He knew how to hide the seriousness of his words by making them funny, or even dumb. Maybe that's why no one took him seriously, because he was just as afraid of reality as the next guy.
"I said I'm fine." Maybe if she said it enough, it would be real, and she would be fine. This sick life she'd been placed in was exhausting, but confessing her fears and emotions would only speak them into reality.
Max got up and went inside. She'd been living with the Sinclairs since she'd woken up from her trance; it was nice, eerily nice. It wasn't actually "creepy," but it was different; there were no slamming doors, no late-night fights, no holes in the walls from Billy punching them. It was quiet. Max never liked silence; she believed it only gave space for her thoughts to become overwhelming.
Steve sat on the front porch, now alone. He placed his face in the palms of his hands and sighed. He sat there in silence for a moment before getting up and walking to the car. He knew Max wasn't fine, but he wasn't going to push. She had Lucas, who knows her better than anyone; if she needs someone, she can talk to him. But that wasn't good enough for Steve.
He got out of the car and went up to the front door of the Sinclairs'. He knocked on the door and waited.
Lucas opened the door. "Steve, I really think she just wants to be alone."
"Just give me five minutes, I know she's not fine, and I'm not just gonna sit here and go along with her game of pretending everything is fine when it's not, none of this is fine." His words almost sounded angry, which he didn't mean. He wasn't mad at Lucas or Max; he was mad at the situation. These were kids; no one was there for him when they were his age. He's not going to sit back and have them go through the same things that he had to experience all on his own.
Lucas was taken aback, "Okay, okay... she's in our room."
"Shit, I'm sorry, man, I'm not angry- I just-" He messed with his hair; he was embarrassed.
"No, I get it. Don't worry." He patted Steve on the back and stepped aside for him to come inside.
Steve walked to Max's room and knocked on the door.
"I just need a minute, Lucas," Max said from inside the room. Her voice sounded softer than before.
Steve opened the door, "Mind if I come in?" He asked, she sat up and faced him, wiping tears from her cheeks.
"I told you, I'm fine." She quickly tried to pull herself together; she didn't want Steve to see her crying.
He walked inside, shutting the door behind him, and sat down on the edge of the bed.
"Look, I know you don't want to talk about it, you wanna pretend you're perfectly okay, and that's fine. But I'm not going to pretend. Max, this shit has been scary, these last few years have been weird, and honestly just insane. You know, I never had anybody to come home to; my parents were always off doing who knows what. I had to handle it all on my own. When those weird-ass Russians nearly killed me, I came back to an empty house. No worried mom, no pissed off dad. I know that wasn't how you grew up; you did have parents around, but that doesn't mean you didn't have to handle shit on your own. You don't have to let me in, you can push me away all you want, but that doesn't mean I'm going anywhere." His voice shook; he'd never told anyone how rough all this had been for him, and he never really planned to.
He looked to Max and noticed her crying; she didn't speak, she just looked at him. He didn't speak either; they sat there in the silence, and they both sat with the understanding that neither of them should be in this position.