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Mike thought long and hard about how he wanted to do this— the delivery, the location, the reception. Christ.
He agonized over it, wore tracks in his floorboards over it, filled up an entire notebook over it. Mike had pictured every possible outcome. The one where Dustin and Lucas were happy for him and thanked him for being so brave. The one where their faces twisted into twin scowls of disgust and they kicked him out of their shared apartment and onto the street. Even the one where they laughed and told him they’d already known, dumbass, you’re embarrassingly obvious. He played it over and over in his head, until he felt confident he was ready, he was. Even if the worst of the worst happened, he was ready. He was prepared.
Because Mike has pictured every possible outcome— except this one.
“Sure, dude,” Lucas said, rolling his eyes like he always did when Mike said something stupid.
“Wha-,” Mike’s jaw dropped open. “I’m serious!”
“And I’m Barbara Streisand,” Dustin snorted. “You know April Fool’s day isn't for another seven months, right?”
“I don’t know,” Lucas pauses, looking thoughtful. Mike held his breath. This was it, this was when they’d realize he was serious. “You do kinda look like Barbara Streisand.”
Mike groaned. It’s official: his friends were idiots. “Guys, I’m telling you. I think I might actually be gay.”
“Right,” Dustin said slowly, like he was stupid. “All the gay guys I know definitely ditch their best friends for the new girl in school and spend their entire sophomore year sequestered away and making out.”
Mike flushed and bristled at the same time. That was years ago, and besides, he and El hadn’t made out nearly as much as his friends thought they did. Definitely not enough for how much they teased him about it. They didn’t really make out at all, and that was half the problem. Every time they kissed, he felt this feeling in his chest, like the room was getting smaller and smaller and he needed to run. First he assumed he just wasn’t ready to take things further. That wasn’t completely unheard of. Then, when the feeling didn’t go away for a year, he assumed El, as wonderful as she was, just wasn’t the right girl for him. They were more compatible as friends anyway.
When the feeling didn’t go away after girls number two, three, and four, he started to get an inkling that maybe something wasn’t right. Perhaps.
He considered that he was just picky, but when Amanda Hawthorne came onto him and all he felt was vague dread and the anxiety that came along with turning someone down, he knew that wasn’t it. None of his friends were as picky as he was, and they were all way more interested in the scenes in movies with scantily clad women than he was. It came to a head when he stole one of Steve’s unmarked tapes to record over, expecting it to be empty but instead finding a video of two men kissing. And then doing other things. He turned cherry red and turned it off immediately. Then he obsessed over it for thirty minutes and turned it back on, rewinding it to the beginning to watch the two men kissing an embarrassing number of times. When he realized he was more turned on than he’d ever been in his life, that’s when he really got the full picture.
If only his friends would believe him.
“Dude,” Lucas rolled his eyes again, shoving Dustin over to make room on the couch. “You don’t know any gay guys. Maybe they do date girls, it’s not like you’d know.”
Dustin grumpily acquiesced. “I think that’s like, antithesis to the point, but okay.”
“Guys!” Mike stared at them, still somewhat in shock that he did the scariest and bravest thing he’d ever done in his life, and his friends didn’t believe him. “I’m telling you I’m gay. Why is that so hard to believe?”
Lucas sat up a little straighter, finally paying full attention to him. “Um, maybe because you’ve never shown interest in guys your whole life? Look, I know you’ve been in a slump with your dating life, and it’s probably hard to see Dustin and me with our girlfriends because you’re worried you’re going to end up alone.” His gaze softened. “I’ve been there. It was hard back in Hawkins for me, I felt like nobody would ever want me. But you just haven’t hit your groove yet, I promise you. You’re smart and funny and not the ugliest guy on the block. You’ll meet someone, and she’ll make you feel like the only guy that matters in the whole world. And in the meantime, we don’t think you’re so bad.” He followed it up with a punch on Mike’s arm, and it was so thoughtful he didn’t even know how to argue anymore.
His friends were so…. so stupid. He loved them so much.
“Ditto,” Dustin said, but Mike knew what he meant. That they had his back, and they didn’t think he was unlovable because they loved him exactly the way he was. Which was really nice, it just wasn’t what he was trying to say. He didn’t think he was unlovable. He thought he was gay.
“Imagine if you were gay ,” Dustin said after a long, emotional pause. “You’d get laughed out of the gay bar so fast it’d leave scorch marks on your ass.”
And Mike was back to hating them.
“Laughed- what? Why would I get laughed out of the gay bar?”
Lucas and Dustin both raised their eyebrows at the same time.
“Mike,” Lucas said slowly. “I don’t know how to say this, but you aren’t exactly…”
“What Lucas is trying to say is that you have no idea how to flirt with people. The last time you tried to get a girl’s number, you threw up in the bar bathroom instead. At a gay bar, guys would actually hit on you. Real guys, who probably want to get into your nerdy little pants. You’d bolt in seconds.”
He said it so dismissively that Mike’s jaw clenched.
“Oh god,” Lucas said with an apprehensive expression. “I know that look. Mike, that is not a challenge. You leave those poor gay men alone, do you hear me? They do not deserve to have all of that,” he gestured at Mike’s entire being, “subjected onto them. Okay?”
But Mike’s mind was already made up. “Sure,” he said. Dustin and Lucas let out twin groans, but Mike didn’t care. He wasn’t scared of going to a gay bar. He wouldn’t fuck it up or freak out or have a panic attack in the bathroom. There would be no scorch marks on his ass, because he wouldn’t get laughed out of the bar. He would go to the gay bar, fit in perfectly because he was gay, and after a little lighthearted flirting, he’d leave.
Easy peasy.
…
This, Mike thought to himself as he stared at his appearance in the bathroom mirror, seemed a lot easier in his head. He thought he looked nice back at the apartment when he put on his best pair of jeans and his favorite t-shirt. He’d actually taken the time to let his hair air dry so it formed all the curls right and used the gel Nancy gave him for Christmas, which got rid of his usual frizz. He looked… Surprisingly nice.
Or so he thought before he entered the Loading Dock, the gay bar right outside of campus. Everyone here looked so put together, confident in a way Mike was not. They looked like they belonged here, laughing with their friends and flirting with the bartender, wearing jewelry or makeup or shirts that showed off their very muscular bodies. Mike knew he was gay- he was like, 95% sure- but he still felt like a fraud. What did he expect to do here? Did he really think he could flirt with a guy? Dustin and Lucas had been right, the second he got inside and saw how comfortable everyone was, he bolted to the bathrooms and locked himself in a stall, very pointedly not thinking about the two men kissing desperately against a wall, despite the swooping feeling it inspired in his stomach.
He was going to have to go back out there sometime, he knew that. And in some ways, it was nice to be here. This was a bar full of people like him, whether he felt like an outcast or not. He had something in common with all of those people, a shared experience that even his closest friends would never understand, not really. It reminded him of seeing Dustin reading a comic book at recess back in fourth grade, of catching a glimpse of Lucas’s Star Trek project the year before that. Even if it was scary, he finally found people like him.
It was scary to sit next to Lucas at lunch, scary to DM his first campaign. It was scary to pick El up for their first date, and even scarier to break up with her. It was really scary to reevaluate himself and his relationship with the world around him, to realize he wasn’t who he thought he was, to realize he didn’t even know himself.
It was scary to be different.
And fuck it, if he could come out to Dustin and Lucas, even if they didn’t believe him, he could sit down at this damn bar and order a drink. He could even flirt with somebody if he wanted to. Who cared if he crashed and burned? It’s not like his friends would laugh at him. They didn’t even know he was here.
With a resolute nod to himself in the mirror, he straightened his spine and marched back into the main area of the bar. It looked the same as it did a few minutes ago, all dim lights and vinyl seating and a steady hum of conversation. The more he looked at it, the more normal it seemed. Sure, some guys were wearing crop tops and mesh, but girls did that all the time and no one cared.
Mike decided he would order a drink and then sit in one of the booths for at least as long as it took to drink it. He could do some subtle people watching, maybe learn some tips on how to fit in by watching everyone else. Only once he finished the drink would he allow himself to go home.
It was a good plan. A great plan. A perfect plan.
It fell apart the second he stepped up to the bar.
“I like your shirt.”
Mike startled. The question had come from the guy sitting on the stool next to him, who was now looking at him expectantly. Mike had been so focused on repeating his drink order in his head again and again like a totally normal and not-at-all anxious person, and now his concentration was broken and he looked like an idiot. Awesome.
“Um. What?”
The guy laughed, and it lit his whole face up. He had this soft-looking brown hair that Mike kind of really wanted to touch, and he also had dimples. Dimples! He was the type of guy that Mike found himself staring at in class, approachable and sweet and beautiful. He’d struck up a few tentative friendships with similar guys in the past, usually through group projects or exchanging derisive comments about their latest test, but the friendship always fell away once Mike found out they had a girlfriend (because they always had a girlfriend). He used to assume they were too busy and didn’t have time to hang out with random guys from their lecture, but now he was wondering if he’d been the one to pull away after all, not wanting to stand so close to something he couldn’t ever have.
It was quite a revelation. Unfortunately, it didn’t help him in this situation.
“The Police?” The guy gestured at his Synchronicity shirt. “I like them too. Reggatta de Blanc is my favorite album.”
“Right, yeah, the Police. ” Mike repeated, like an idiot.
The guy cocked his head at him, clearly questioning his mental capacity or maybe his sobriety levels. “Is that like, a friend’s shirt or something? It’s okay if you don’t listen to them, I’m not a music snob, I promise.”
Then Mike’s instincts kicked in. “I listen to the Police, fuck you. You’re out of your mind if you think Reggatta de Blanc is better than Synchronicity.”
And there went any of his chances with the gorgeous guy in front of him who, for some reason liked Mike enough to compliment him. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. At least he didn’t get a drink poured on him… yet.
“Ah,” the guy nodded to himself, the corner of his mouth twitched up into a perfect small smile. “So you’re a music snob, got it.”
Mike was floundering. “I’m not- I wasn’t… jesus fucking christ.” He sat down on the stool next to the guy and set his head down on the bar. It was a good thing Lucas and Dustin didn’t believe he was gay, because this was a disaster. Maybe he wasn’t gay or straight. Maybe he was some secret third thing that should come with a warning sign: UNSUITABLE FOR HUMAN RELATIONSHIPS- AVOID AT ALL COSTS.
“If it makes you feel any better,” the guy said to Mike’s slumped form. “That’s not the worst thing someone’s said to me at this bar.”
Mike groaned. “So not helping.”
He laughed again, and it somehow made Mike’s complete failure to be a regular human being feel like a joke they were both in on.
“Come on, it’s not so bad, sit up.”
Mike sat up, guided by the hand on his shoulder, warm even through the fabric of his shirt.
“Why don’t we start with your name, then we can get to your very bold and passionate music opinions.”
Mike flushed red, but the teasing was worth it for the playful glint in the guy’s eye. “I’m Mike. Just so you know who to laugh at when you tell this story to your friends later.”
The guy laughed again, and it kind of made Mike feel invincible. “I’m Will. And I’m not going to laugh at you with my friends, oh my god. What kind of monster do you take me for? You’re doing alright for your first time here.”
Great. That made him feel better. “Is it that obvious?”
Will pursed his lips, expression unreadable. “Honestly? It’s really not. I’m just here a lot, and I’ve never seen you before. I would have remembered if I had.”
And then the horrible blush was back on Mike's face. Why did he feel like he was back in middle school, fumbling every single one of his social interactions? “Because I’m wearing a Police shirt?”
“Because you’re cute, Mike.” He said it easily, like he said things like this all the time, but Mike could still see an undercurrent of tension as he waited to see what Mike would say back.
Then he realized he'd lost complete control of his original plan. Order a drink, sit at a table, flirt with a cute boy. “Wait a minute, this isn’t how this is supposed to go. I’m supposed to be flirting with you, not the other way around.”
Will raised a perfectly shaped eyebrow and leaned his chin on his hand, elbow on the bar. “Is that so?”
“Yup, and you’re messing it up by being all…” Mike gestured at him.
“Flirtatious?”
“Perfect.” He hadn’t meant to say it, but he didn’t regret it. Not when it made Will’s cheeks flush like that as he took another sip of his drink, dropping his eyes for a moment to regain his composure.
“So,” Mike said, scrambling for something to keep the conversation going. “You said people are sometimes bigger douchebags to you than I was.”
At this, Will met his gaze again. “You aren’t so bad,” he knocked their shoulders together. “And yeah. A lot of people come here looking for a hookup, and some people aren’t always the nicest when I say no.”
A flash of anger swept through Mike, hot and intense. “That’s bullshit! Are any of them here tonight?” He started looking around, like he’d have any idea what to do if he saw one of those guys.
Will grabbed his shoulder again to stop him from looking around. “Oh my god, stop it, don’t be stupid. I’m fine.” But he was looking at Mike with this soft expression, like he was some sort of knight in shining armor. “I didn’t mean you should go hunt them down, jesus," he chuckled nervously, running a hand through his hair. “I just wanted you to know I wasn’t put off by your rambling earlier. Like I said,” he flushed deeper but didn’t hesitate, “you’re cute.”
Mike didn’t want to appear desperate, but he had to know. “Do you really think so?”
“Yeah, Mike. I do.”
“Cool.” Mike cleared his throat. “Cool, cool. So if you don’t come here to meet people, why do you come?”
Will shrugged, and it suddenly occurred to Mike that Will hadn’t moved his hand from his shoulder. It sent a possessive thrill through him. “Sometimes I come here with friends. Other times it’s just me. I like hanging out somewhere I feel normal, if that makes sense.”
Mike thought about his revelation in the bathroom and nodded. “Yeah. Yeah, that does make sense.”
“Besides,” Will added coyly, “I never said I didn’t come here to meet people.” He slid his hand down Mike’s arm slowly, intertwining their fingers when he reached his hand.
“Oh. Oh. You want- with me?”
“God, you’re adorable.” Will tugged him up until they were both standing. “Do you want to come back to my place? It’s a short walk. We could get to know each other better.” This was the one time in the conversation where Will seemed hesitant rather than confident, insecurity bleeding through his movements.
As if anyone in their right mind would say no.
“Yeah,” he said breathlessly. “Yes please.”
It didn’t occur to him until they’d already left that he never even ordered a drink.
…
Will’s place was meticulously organized, clean, and put-together. He had a color-coded bookshelf, three framed posters on the wall, and records arranged alphabetically. Even his couch and his armchair matched each other.
Will let Mike rifle through his things, smiling behind his hand at all his commentary and questions. Mike would have felt embarrassed if he didn’t feel so comfortable. Something about Will’s place put him at ease. He felt much more relaxed here than he did at the bar.
“You clearly have good taste,” Mike nodded after pawing through his entire bookshelf. He was surprised by the amount of fantasy and classic sci-fi novels he had. There was no way someone as attractive and approachable as Will was also a nerd, and if he was, then there was no way he was interested in Mike. There was just no way Mike was that lucky. Zero percent chance.
“Clearly,” Will said, with a quick flick of his eyes down Mike’s body, but Mike was too busy gawking at what he found on top of the bookshelf to notice.
“Is this a D20?”
Will’s jaw dropped open. “You play D&D?”
“Hell yeah, I’ve been DMing since like, fifth grade, though I haven’t run a campaign in a year because, like, college. What’s your favorite class?”
Will blinked again, then seemed to shake himself out of it. “Wizard. What about you?”
“Of course it is, I should have known. That’s exactly what’s been missing in our group! We have a bard and a ranger, but we’re really missing a magical element so our group is lopsided. I’m a paladin.”
“Mhm,” Will said, but his mind seemed to be elsewhere.
“Are you looking to join any new campaigns? Because we really could use you. I’d have to ask Dustin and Lucas of course, but I’m sure they’d agree. They’d love you, I already know it. Christ, they’ll probably like you more than me, but I can’t even be mad about it because like, look at you. What are the odds that I finally meet someone who plays D&D and they’re literally the perfect fit for–”
“Mike,” Will says with a determined look in his eyes, suddenly much closer. “Could you stop talking for a minute?”
“Oh.” Mike blinked, snapping out of his excited, semi-manic ramble. “Sure.”
“Cool,” he smiled that small smile that made Mike’s heart beat faster at the bar, then he grabbed Mike by the front of his Synchronicity t-shirt and kissed him.
Oh. Oh wow. Mike was definitely gay.
That was the last coherent thought he had before he lost himself to the feeling of Will’s mouth on his, soft and pliant, and his hands smoothing down the front of Mike’s shirt all the way down to the waistband of his jeans. He slid his fingers underneath the shirt to the warm skin beneath, and Mike’s breathing hitched. He could feel Will smile in response. Christ, he could feel Will’s smile.
Trembling slightly, he did what he wanted to do from the first time he saw Will and brushed his hands through Will’s hair. God, it was as soft as it looked. He was perfect, everything about him was perfect. He angled Will’s head just a little bit, and Will pressed his body closer with a groan until they were touching from thigh to chest.
“You’re so-” Will said between kisses. “So infuriating.”
“Infuriating?”
“You’re so hot and you don’t even know it,” he growled, kissing Mike’s jaw, then lower and lower. With an angry sound, he tugged at Mike’s shirt, which was apparently blocking the place he wanted to put his mouth. Mike was not complaining. He took off the shirt. “Acting all self-deprecating and shy, like no one would want you.” He shook his head, like the concept was too much to wrap his head around. “Who wouldn’t want you? You’re so—" but instead of finishing the sentence with words, he reattached himself to Mike’s mouth, licking skillfully inside just the right amount.
Mike made an embarrassing sound and pulled Will’s shirt over his head. His skin was so warm, and he had freckles on his shoulders and— Mike swallowed hard, catching sight of the trail of hair leading from his stomach into his pants.
“Come on,” Will grabbed his hand and stopped kissing him, which should have been a crime. He laughed and Mike's bereft expression and tugged them both towards an unopened door that turned out to be his bedroom. “Come on, come on.”
“Alright, I’m coming!”
Will pushed him down onto the bed when he got there, but he didn’t immediately climb on his lap and resume kissing him like Mike wanted. Instead, he just smiled down at him, like he couldn’t believe his luck.
“What do you want to do?”
The thing was, Mike didn’t know how to do anything. Yes, he knew the mechanics, but he’d never gone further than kissing before today, and suddenly it occurred to him that he might be about to embarrass himself in front of the hottest, sweetest, most perfect guy he’s ever met.
“Um,” he said, and Will must have read some apprehension in his face because he sat down on the bed beside him, still holding his hand. “I haven’t actually… done this a lot. Which you probably could tell.” He laughed a little awkwardly, but Will looked surprised.
“Really?” Will trailed his fingers over Mike’s palm, sending shivers up his arm.
“Really. So I guess I don’t really know what I want to do, except that I love kissing you.”
Will smiled, and once again Mike felt like the luckiest guy in the world. “We can do that,” he said, his voice low. “I love kissing you too.”
And even though it should come as no surprise since they just spent several heavenly minutes kissing in Will’s living room, the thought still made Mike’s head spin.
“Yeah?”
Will laughed into Mike’s collarbone, happy and disbelieving. “I cannot believe I found you first,” he murmured to himself. He crawled into Mike’s lap and placed his hands on either side of his face, just studying him. It took everything in Mike not to look away from such intense scrutiny. Will’s thumb swept over his cheek, and Mike’s eyes fluttered shut at the feeling. “Yes, Mike. I love kissing you. You’re kind of perfect, did you know that?”
Mike’s hands found Will’s hips on instinct. “Now you’re just stealing my lines.”
“What did I say earlier?” Will frowned at him with feigned disapproval.
“Stop talking?”
“That’s right,” he brushed Mike’s hair away from his eyes with far too much tenderness for such a heated moment. “You’re a fast learner.”
“I’ll show you what else I can learn.” Mike flipped them over on the bed so that he was hovering over Will, who let out a shrieking laugh, and then it was on.
…
“Lucas, Dustin, I want you to meet Will. He’s the guy I mentioned last week. He’ll be joining the new campaign as our resident wizard.” Mike kept his hand on Will’s lower back as they made their way into the apartment. Will mentioned feeling nervous on the drive over, though Mike knew he had no reason to be. If anything, Dustin and Lucas should be nervous to meet Will. He was better than both of them by far.
When Mike told him this in the parking garage before they headed inside, Will only smiled and pressed a kiss to his lips. "You're sweet.”
Mike leaned forward and Will kissed him again, just enough that Mike melted into it. Just enough that he considered ditching the entire evening in favor of kissing Will in his car for a couple of hours. He eyed the backseat.
“Mike, no.”
“Oh come on! We haven’t made out in the backseat yet. Isn’t that like, a right of passage?” He lowered his voice into the tone he knew Will found sexy and nipped at his ear. “Don’t you want to?”
“Jesus christ, Mike,” Will breathed. “You’re gonna be the death of me one of these days. And besides,” his eyes roamed down Mike’s body, slow and teasing, like he could see straight through his clothes and he liked what he saw, “if I get you in the backseat, we’ll be doing a lot more than making out.”
Then he pulled back and stepped out of the car, shooting Mike a shit-eating grin when he cursed and slammed his head against the steering wheel a couple of times. Was it possible to die of horniness? Mike supposed he would find out.
“We’re gonna be late, come on!”
Mike grumbled all the way to the door, but it was all for show and Will knew it. Will was just perfect like that, which was why he knew his friends would love him.
“Alright!” Dustin pumped his fist in the air. “We’ll finally have a balanced group. We’ve been looking for a wizard forever. Where did you even find him?”
“The Loading Dock,” Mike said matter-of-factly.
Lucas and Dustin stared at him. "The gay bar?"
Mike had a hard time holding in a laugh, and he could tell by the expression on Will’s face that he was struggling too.
“It’s true,” Will chimed in.
Dustin shook his head. “Only Mike would go to a gay bar and come back with another player for our campaign. You’ve got like, negative game, man. You know that, don’t you?”
Will’s bottom lip was turning white from how hard he was biting it to keep his grin at bay.
“Mike didn’t hit on you, did he?” Lucas added. “If he did, he’s very sorry and he’ll never do it again. Right, Mike?”
“No I’m not, and yes I will.” Mike said pleasantly, wrapping his arm fully around Will's waist. Will leaned into his touch, and Mike was in heaven. This was the perfect day, it really was.
“Dude,” Dustin exclaimed, giving him please stop embarrassing us eyes. “You’re gonna scare him off.”
“What do you think, babe?” Mike turned to Will. “Am I gonna scare you off?”
“Hmm,” Will pretended to think. “No, I don’t think so.”
“See? My boyfriend doesn’t mind.”
The room was completely silent for a moment, then… Mike waited for it…
“Boyfriend?!”
Will cackled, just as relaxed in Mike's apartment as he’d been in the Loading Dock, and Mike couldn’t hold back anymore. With a smug smirk to his friends, he pulled Will into a long, deep, very gay kiss, just to seal the deal.