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“Let me see something.”
Ironic. Those steely eyes could do anything but.
Toph knew that and perhaps this was her attempt to rile up this calm night between two hopefuls. While it was quite a simple joke, and one that would have gotten her deadpan looks from her other friends, there were really was no response from her company as he maintained the same calm and aloof expression he always had.
A dopey and ignorant reaction.
She should have known that telling jokes to him would be like explaining the sea to a badgermole yet she didn’t hold it to him. All that Toph could do was shake her head and try, try again in prodding him into acting a little more like he actually cared about her being here tonight because by heaven she could use that affirmation.
Affirmations like touch and hearing.
That’s all she could receive. Steely eyes couldn’t see but this callous hands could feel the crimson silk shift between her fingertips and sensitive ears could hear the soft breathing that escaped his lips. They sounded kind of moist now that Toph thought about it. Soft and plump with a slight tremble because every time he exhaled it sputtered just a little.
Was he nervous?
Heaven’s no. That was stupid. All this was stupid. Romance was dumb and love was just something that made people feel uncomfortable. Yes, Toph could remember her childhood crushes and how stupid she acted making quite the fool out of herself while trying to keep her stomach from hurling out countless “butterflies”. So so childish and so so stupid that Toph couldn’t help but let out a laugh at the thought.
“What’s so funny?”
Zuko sounded genuinely confused in much the manner as he would have been with any other comedy as seen with his reaction to Toph’s joke moments prior. To his credit, he did try to maintain some positive feelings despite his clear inability to relate and even mimicked her laughter for just a split second before looking at her inquisitively.
“I’m just thinking about when we were kids.”
“I… I don’t think we were kids when we met, Toph.”
“Teens tweens whatever, firecracker. It’s all just stupid memories anyways.”
“Oh….”
Genuine hurt. Toph heard the man shift upon the stone bench they sat on and felt him move away. At once she repented of what she had said not for any discernible reason apart from the sheer fact she wanted him closer and closer. Whatever she had to do to get him to shuffle back so that she could lean upon his shoulder was something she would do with no hesitation, and that exactly what she did:
“Did I say something wrong? Shit...”
She pressed upon him. Zuko felt her form sink into his shoulder once again and saw that look of concern upon her face.
Those steely eyes.
They couldn’t see him but boy could he see them. Trembling. Glowing. Shining. Sparkling. Like polished silver or perhaps even… even the light of a faraway star like those that were above them as they rested upon this palace balcony. They weren’t even supposed to be here. They were supposed to be with all their friends at this fine get together that Zuko himself hosted as to reunite after much time separated yet here the very host of the event was away from all.
Why Toph followed along was beyond him but before long Zuko found himself talking.
And talking.
And talking.
And getting a little closer each time.
A little too close.
Not that he minded feeling that form upon his upper arm and that head on his shoulder but it was much too peculiar for him not to have second opinions on the matter.
“You didn’t say anything wrong, Toph. I was just… Remembering something too.”
“Why did you move away then?”
“I’m sorry, are you a little cold?”
Whatever spirit possessed the man was a good one as the face on Toph when Zuko wrapped his arm around her shoulder was one that he could never forget. It was one that, just like many years ago, he could find himself remembering over and over again in memories that weren’t at all stupid.
There was a stillness.
One from Toph nesting herself into Zuko’s armpit and the other Zuko trying to survive whatever onslaught his sentiments were causing to brew up inside of him.
“So. So! Anyways. What about this night huh? It’s… calm. Cool. It’s… Starry.”
Zuko sputtered. It was a losing battle.
“Yeah. Stars.”
From the heavens that were above him to the heaven that was beside him. The Fire Lord traded two twinkling balls of fire for two sparkling balls that lacked sight but made up for it by being upon a simple yet comely face.
“Your sight. I wish you had it right now so you could look up at all these stars.”
“Eh, I never really cared.”
“Right… Well It would be no loss if you never had sight to begin with I assume…”
Zuko sighed
“You could never really lose anything when we talk about seeing because you never had anything. It would be like pitying a fish for not being able to smell a nice roast because it never had the ability to breathe air at all.”
“O…….. k???”
Uh oh.
“What I’m trying to say, Toph, is that sometimes… well… people who have something can lose it.”
“Uh. Yeah. That’s how losing stuff works, Zuko.”
“And- Can you let me talk for a moment? I’m trying to tell you something.”
He couldn’t be mad at her. He even felt bad scolding her and all it took was for Toph to give him a toothy grin that made her look so coquette and playful.
“What I want to say is… I. I. I could lose something I saw. Like if I became blind right now I would clearly lose what I am seeing. I would never be able to tell what the stars are like anymore. Neither would I be able to tell how you look like anymore. I just have to go off of what I remember it all being but things change. Even the very stars above change. There are patterns up there that didn’t exist when lion turtles roamed the earth and perhaps what I’m seeing now wont be there a hundred years from now.
What I’m trying to say Toph…
Do you believe in love at first sight?”
Ah. That’s what that was about.
To say Toph didn’t expect it would be a lie, but she also didn’t expect it in this manner. Surely Zuko had never been the best with expressing himself, being either completely stunted or overly volatile, yet here he was nervous but overall doing his best to speak to her plainly.
“Can’t say I dooooooo, fireboy.”
“Well, neither do I.
But perhaps I believe in love at second sight.
Or third. Or fiftieth.
Or under the light of the many stars.”
Toph felt his finger prop up her chin.
“But even if it wasn’t at first sight I wouldn’t want to lose even the hundredth sight of you. I have something to lose. I have something that I don’t want to relegate to memories or to my ears or to my nose. I don’t think I could bear the life you were born into and that makes you greater than I even with this crown on my head.”
Another pause.
“Can I kiss you, Toph Beifong?”
“Zuko… I wouldn’t want to lose one moment being able to feel you.”