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High school was the scariest place on earth.
Not because of Sunghoon's crippling 3 am realization that none of this would matter in five years (though that was also true, but very much a Sunghoon problem here). No, it was scary because of the ecosystem. David Attenborough could've narrated this shit.
It worked like this: at the top, you had your apex predators. The Popular Kids who'd peaked hard at 17. The Smart Kids who were either going to run the world or have a complete psychological collapse by 27. And The Jocks, the physically and socially dominant leaders due to central roles in high school movies with much less intellectual pursuits.
Work your way down and you hit The Artsy Kids, who had pretty darn strong opinions about things. The Theater Kids who were somehow, always going through something. The Nerds, which was its own separate category from The Smart Kids and don't you dare conflate the two or you'd hear about it.
And then, at the very bottom: The Losers.
Sunghoon belonged somewhere between The Jock and The Loser.
The Real Jock category was specifically reserved for The Sports With Balls: basketball, football, baseball, even tennis if you were rich and hot enough to pull it off.
He'd been figure skating since he was only 4. Competed internationally and already had his university admission locked in through an athlete scholarship. The sport was not uncool, per se. But figure skating existed in a very specific social bracket that high school's unspoken hierarchy had collectively decided not to acknowledge more than the ball sports.
On paper, Sunghoon was miles ahead of most of the jocks. Achievements-wise and résumé-wise. But Sunghoon's sport did not have balls except the ones between his legs.
Jock by discipline, Loser by association. A man in no man's land. The Switzerland of the social food chain, except Switzerland is neutral and powerful and Sunghoon was just kind of... gay.
This wasn't some sweeping indictment of gay people and social standing. Sunghoon wanted that on the record.
Take Jungwon, for instance. Jungwon did Taekwondo, which also did not involve a ball, and he was Gay. Not in the ambiguous "we're all a little curious after that one camping trip" gay, he was the full thing. But he had also been properly socialized as a child and had grown up without incident. He was fine, he got The Popular Kid status.
Sunghoon's problem (by Sunghoon's own rigorous internal assessment) was simpler and more embarrassing than he'd like to admit: he was too much in his own head. Jungwon had learned that at some critical developmental window Sunghoon had clearly missed due to his figure skating schedules, how to be a person. Sunghoon learned how to be an "adult" and athlete first before he learned to be a functioning human being.
If you asked most of his classmates to describe him, you'd get a long pause and then, "...tall?" because no one had really seen him at school.
His attendance record was a decorative document at best. Between regional competitions, nationals, the occasional internationals—Sunghoon spent more time in ice rinks in various cities than he did in school. He was basically a ghost student who occasionally showed up to collect a grade.
His social life, such as it was, consisted of Jay only. And Jake, who came as a package deal. That was it.
People loved to say high school romance was the most beautiful time of your life. Sunghoon's romantic history could be summarized in a sentence: it didn't exist.
Did he have time for romance? No. Did he have the social infrastructure for romance? Also no. Did he have the emotional availability for romance, given that approximately 90% of his brain was occupied by figure skating and competition anxiety? Absolutely not.
Except.
On the rare occasions Sunghoon was physically present at school, his maiden heart—his tragically 18 year old untouched heart, locked onto one thing.
"Dude, stop staring, it's creepy," Jay said without looking up from his phone.
"How could anyone even tell I'm staring?" Sunghoon refused to look away from his right, he couldn't even afford to blink and missed a second of it. "There are like fifty people here."
"Everyone in the bleachers is watching the game. You're watching Kim Sunoo in the bleachers." Jay looked up and Sunghoon looked offended, he went back to his phone. "Right, my bad, you're gay."
They were at the outdoor court with tiered concrete bleachers on one side. Many seniors gathered here instead of in their classes because last week of school meant they could have free periods for a full week. The only genuinely good thing about high school was that it ended.
The Actual Real Jocks were doing their Actual Real Jock things. Basketball. One of The Most Ball of all the ball sports in high school. Arguably second to football.
On the court, Riki The Freshman was doing laps with his tall body and giving everyone ample time to appreciate the view. Sunghoon hated him on principle. Anyone would when they see someone younger exceed them in every physical metric. He was probably still growing.
"Yo, pass it—pass it—" Riki called out, hand up. He caught the ball mid-stride and sank it from the three-point line in one perfect motion.
"Why doesn't this school allow male cheerleaders?"
Sunghoon was not talking about Nishimura Riki, obviously. Or any latent fantasy involving a skimpy skirt and a position on the basketball's cheer squad. He was talking about Kim Sunoo who sat on the bottom bleachers with the cheerleaders, right in the sweet spot where basketball guys wandered over in between games.
Jay knew exactly where Sunghoon was looking. "Because Kim Sunoo is the only man in this school who looked like that."
Sunghoon nodded. Reached over. Took some of Jay's chips. "Fair."
"Do you have any idea how genuinely horrible it would be to imagine literally any other guy in this school in a cheerleading uniform." Jay pointed at himself. "Picture me. Go ahead."
Sunghoon gave him a once over and wished he didn't. "Yeah I'm not gonna go there."
"So we agree."
Sunghoon's crush on Sunoo had a very simple origin story: Sunghoon liked pretty things. And Sunoo was, without any competition, the prettiest thing in this entire school.
Sunoo was on the student council. He was friends with the popular kids and the losers simultaneously, even the troublemakers somehow wouldn't mess with him. Which should've been sociologically impossible given the tectonic tension between those plates, but somehow Sunoo existed at the intersection and held the whole thing together.
And Sunghoon had spent the better part of two years watching Kim Sunoo exist from a cowardly distance.
He had never once done anything about it. Not even low-stakes hey, I'm Sunghoon. Because how do you follow that up? I've accidentally made eye contact with you four times and I've thought about each one separately in the shower? Hard no.
Frankly, he was scared. Not of Sunoo. But of his rotating cast of 𝖊𝖛𝖎𝖑 𝖇𝖔𝖞𝖋𝖗𝖎𝖊𝖓𝖉𝖘.
Sunoo, quite the opposite to Sunghoon, was always dating someone. Which, fine, understandable. Statistically inevitable when you looked like that and were emotionally literate. He wasn't judging.
But every single person Sunoo had dated had turned out to be, in some capacity, an idiot. The recurring one was guys who obviously peaked in high school and would spend the next forty years telling anyone who'd listen about that one time they were actually cool in high school. Which said nothing about Sunoo and everything about the limited options available in a school where Sunghoon himself was considered a realistic candidate by absolutely no one.
And by conventional metrics, Sunoo's ex-boyfriends wouldn't be considered evil but any man that has Sunoo's heart was an enemy of him.
"Who are you asking to the dance?" Jay asked. "I'm thinking Jungwon."
Sunghoon turned to look at him. "There is no way."
"I've got nothing to lose. Last week of school. What's the worst he can do? Say no?"
"He will politely and earnestly say no with eye contact. It will haunt you."
"Oh right, that's the worst." Jay shrugged. "Meh. Character building."
Sunghoon looked at Sunoo and pondered. Not happening. Kim Sunoo would absolutely bring his hunk of a boyfriend to the dance. Sunghoon wasn't about to get jumped by some 185cm basketball guy with anger issues and a GPA of 2.1. It wasn't exactly in his high school bucket list.
"I'll go alone."
"Why don't you ask Kim Sunoo?"
"No way," Sunghoon declined, and with great dignity, "I'm playing the long game with Sunoo. Picture this—ten years in the future, high school reunion. He's just ended things with whatever idiot he's dating by then. I'm already retired at the ripe age of 28. Five Olympic gold medals. Super rich. Probably wearing a long coat. I'll be dark and mysterious and have my shit together." There was too much conviction in his tone because he'd thought about this many times in the shower. "He's vulnerable and heartbroken. I've processed my childhood. I have plants. Frontal lobe activated. He needs a soft place to land, and I'm just—" He opened one hand. "There."
Jay put on his standard what a fucking loser expression. "That's fucking pathetic, I don't know what to say."
"I'm at phase one of this plan."
"You know that's not gonna work like that, right? College is gonna be completely different. You get a new crush, date somebody, it's a disaster, you date somebody else, that's also a disaster, and then you spend the rest of your life lying awake wondering what would've happened if you'd just asked Kim Sunoo out once to see how he felt about it. So just get this over with." He paused. "Also, didn't he just break up with his boyfriend?"
Sunghoon's head snapped around so fast. "Did he?"
"That's what I heard."
"What did you hear."
"His boyfriend slept with Lee Heeseung's mom."
"Ew. Isn't that illegal?"
Sunghoon returned to stare at his beloved Kim Sunoo basked under the lovely sun, his dark brown hair shiny and his light brown eyes turned the prettiest shade of amber that twinkled.
By some grace of the universe, Kim Sunoo, for the first time in forever, was single.
One week.
He had one week of school left to ask Kim Sunoo out.
Having a crush was a humiliation ritual. One day you were normal, the next day you were rerouting your entire path just to walk past a specific classroom for a 3 second glimpse of someone.
Sunghoon was hovering Jay's locker doing exactly that—staring across the hallway at Kim Sunoo. Sunghoon's locker was all the way on the other side of this building but he was a man on a mission, the mission being to do absolutely nothing except stare because that'd be all he could manage to do within 5m radius to Sunoo.
Sunoo was chatting with Haewon and Jungwon in front of their lockers. Haewon was showing Sunoo something on her phone, holding it up to his face, and Sunoo was leaning in to squint at it before reeling back scandalously. Jungwon said a passing remark, and Haewon pointed at him like yes, exactly, thank you, and Sunoo looked between them with his mouth open like he'd just been ganged up on, which, judging by the way Haewon and Jungwon then looked at each other, he probably had.
Sunghoon wished he could lip-read because it looked like they were shit-talking Sunoo's ex boyfriend. Sunghoon also wanted in because he also had an unsolicited opinion or two. First being he needed to stop wearing Gucci monogram pants and fanny packs.
Jay closed his locker and saw the pathetic pining glances. "Ask him out."
"You go ask Jungwon out first."
"Your situation is a crisis. Mine is a slow burn."
"How is mine a crisis."
"Does Kim Sunoo know your name."
Sunghoon bleh'd.
Jay wagged his hand. "Jungwon and I are basically friends. That's different."
"Does Jungwon know that?"
Jake came skipping down the hall eating a lollipop, dropping both arms around their shoulders. "Hey. What are we staring at?"
Jay pointed with his lips.
"Oh." Jake squinted. "Kim Sunoo? You're finally doing it? You're asking him out?"
Sunghoon shrugged. Then he saw Riki had planted himself in front of Sunoo and was doing the arm-against-the-locker thing. He was propped up and leaned in at an angle while talking to Sunoo. That was so unnecessary.
Sunghoon concluded that between an overgrown jock baby and himself, he couldn't compete. "Nah," he said. "Bad idea."
Riki finally left and Jake took the moment to shove Sunghoon forward and sent him stumbling directly across the hallway and into the immediate orbit of Kim Sunoo.
At the same time, Haewon and Jungwon had just done their bye-bye-see-you-tomorrow thing, filing past Sunghoon—not without doing the up-down look at him with matching expressions of who is this and why is he here.
Sunoo waited. Sunghoon stood there. He was looking at Sunghoon with genuine, patient curiosity. He was basically giving him a real and fair chance to say literally something worthwhile. Which Sunghoon would, if Kim Sunoo hadn't been so darn cute up close.
If Sunghoon could explain how this situation felt, he'd say: AWOOGA AWOOGA, jaw dropped to the floor, eyes popped out of sockets, heart beating out of chest.
"Do you need something from me?"
Sunghoon's jaw did not technically fall off but it wanted to.
"I have somewhere to be, so." Sunoo tilted his head. Still inexplicably lovely about the whole thing. "If it's not urgent, meet me after school outside my classroom? You can find me there if you want."
Sunghoon widened his eyes like a fish, before realizing he probably thought it was a student council inquiry, his eyes returned to their normal size.
Sunoo smiled anyway and gave him a little wave. "Bye. See you."
After Sunoo left, he turned to his friends. "I hope you're fucking happy."
Jay and Jake keeled over against the lockers with silent laughter, physically holding each other up.
Jake laughed. "What are you so scared of? Just talk to him."
"I think Riki's asking him to the dance."
"So? Go up against him. Make a case. Tell him why he should pick you."
"You don't get it." Sunghoon pointed at him. "Riki is a jock."
"And you're an athlete?"
"I'm a figure skating athlete," Sunghoon groaned at the injustice of it, at the entire social ecosystem and its deeply unfair ball-based hierarchy. "People love sports with balls. I don't do balls. I suck at balls!"
"Hey, hey, hey." Jay held up a hand, glancing down the hallway. "Indoor voice when we're talking about balls. Remember?"
Sunghoon flipped him off.
The subway was packed, shoulder to shoulder. Sunghoon had one hand on the overhead bar and was doing absolutely fine with the overload sensory of people all around him until he spotted Sunoo three bodies away standing next to Riki, who had taken the crowd to his advantage.
Riki was caging Sunoo. He had one arm on the overhead bar but the other one was on the rail behind Sunoo's head. He was doing that head dipping thing again.
"He's doing the thing."
"What thing?"
"He's doing the thing, Jake!!"
The subway lurched. Everyone swayed. Sunghoon moved in expert opportunistic navigation. He slithered through the crowd and timed the next pull of the car perfectly, let the momentum carry him forward and landed directly between Riki and Sunoo with a seamless, "Oh sorryyyyy" before bracing both arms on the rail and bar on either side of Sunoo to replace Riki.
"Oh." Sunghoon gaped with his best faux-surprise. "You?"
Sunoo looked up and laughed. "Hey! You take this line too? How have I never seen you on here before?"
"I'm heading to Jake's place."
Behind Sunghoon, Jake had jumped on the other side of the car and was currently doing the exact same arm-cage maneuver on Riki. Except Riki had about a full head on him and was staring down at Jake in confusion, offense, and reluctant imprisonment.
"Hey, Riki," Jake said teasingly, wiggling his brows. "What's up?"
Riki tried to duck out. Jake pushed him back against the rail with a firm, cheerful smile.
Sunoo seemed a little curious. "Didn't you want to ask me something earlier? At school?"
"Oh, that." He waved a hand and lied, "I sorted it out with Jungwon."
"Oh, okay."
Sunoo gave him a cute tiny smile. Sunghoon grinned back.
Across the car, Riki made another attempt at freedom. Jake held firm.
"There's nowhere to go. The subway's packed. You're stuck with me~"
Riki stared down at him. Jake was significantly smaller than Riki but this did not appear to bother Jake in any capacity.
Jake winked. "You have to spend time with me now."
"I can literally step over you."
"Oof, I think I might like it."
Sunghoon had not planned on going to Jeju.
He had, in fact, actively not planned on it. The school trip was a three day of organized fun and activities chosen by the student council, which sounded like a joy if Sunghoon hated himself. He'd only looked at the flyer once at the beginning of the semester and never thought about it again.
Then Jay mentioned that it was seniors only. No freshmen meant no Nishimura Riki. No chance for Riki to talk to Sunoo for two days straight. Which was awesome. Hence, at the very last minute, Sunghoon decided to go.
They'd just gotten off the bus at the hotel, bags hitting the pavement, everyone stretching and groaning, when Haewon caught up in front of him with a clipboard.
"Hi, Sunghoon. Because you signed up last minute—" She tapped the clipboard. "You couldn't pick your roommate. Sorry."
"That's fine." Sunghoon shrugged. It wasn't like he had options to begin with. "Whoever it is, it's fine."
He spotted Sunoo at the hotel reception desk, talking to the front staff with his bag strap sliding off one shoulder, fixing it absently mid-sentence without breaking eye contact with the receptionist. Sunghoon exhaled fondly.
He was mentally drafting his itinerary for the next three days—breakfast, watch Sunoo eat breakfast from across the dining hall. Lunch, same thing. What a full and fulfilling trip. He'd have the time of his life staring at Sunoo from a distance.
He was mid-thought about tonight's dinner logistics since he read in the itinerary that they were supposed to have dinner at the beach, when he noticed Sunoo was closer than usual. Which was strange because Sunoo was usually across a hallway. But right now the details were very vivid.
Sunghoon could see his lashes from here, that was a first. They were long and pretty.
"Do you want to drop your stuff in the room first?"
Sunghoon was still thinking about Sunoo's eyelashes.
"Sunghoon?"
He blinked into focus. Sunoo had been standing right there in front of him. That's why the lashes were so high definition.
"You know my name?"
"Of course, Park Sunghoon right?"
Sunghoon refrained from fist-pumping. Park Jongseong could suck his dick. Kim Sunoo knew his name.
"Follow me." Sunoo smiled. "I'll show you the room."
"Right. Sick. Okay."
Sunoo used a keycard on room 214, pushed the door open, and said, "I hope you don't mind rooming with me—I was supposed to have this room alone, so it's the small room."
"Mmm. Doesn't matter—" Sunghoon said automatically, stepping inside.
Then he stopped. His slow brain finally caught up. He was rooming with Kim Sunoo?
He pressed his hand over his mouth and clamped it there.
Then he saw the bed.
"Also… I'm so sorry," Sunoo said immediately, wincing. "The other room types were fully booked by the time you signed up. I can ask for an extra mattress, I don't mind taking the floor—"
Sunghoon was looking at the TWIN BED. Not even a double bed, it was a fucking twin bed. Christmas came early for Park Sunghoon.
In all seriousness, it was a nice bed. He felt terrible about this situation that was so unfortunate for everyone involved. "That doesn't make any sense," Sunghoon said, gravely. "Fully booked." He walked over to the bed. Sat down on it. Pressed his hand into the mattress testing the softness. He bounced on it once. Not twice because that would be weird. "I mean." He looked up. "There's room. Probably. I think we'd both fit. But yeah, no, ask for the mattress." He nodded seriously. "Definitely ask."
Fuck staring from afar, Park Sunghoon would share a bed with Kim Sunoo tonight.
"I'll go out with my friends before the campfire tonight, here's the spare key." Sunoo put the key card on the nightstand. "Enjoy your free time, Sunghoon."
The campfire thing wasn't until tonight, which meant they had time to kill. Jake, Jay, and Sunghoon stopped at the convenience store first to get chips, ramyeon, samgak kimbap and were eating on the curb outside when Sunoo and Jungwon and Haewon walked by.
Sunghoon had shoved an entire triangle kimbap into his mouth at that exact moment that got the three student council members staring then froze.
Jake waved them over to join and made that disgusting sensual winky face at Jay and Sunghoon thinking he'd just played cupid.
Somehow they ended up inside the arcade next to the convenience store with a bet on an air hockey table. The details of how weren't important—something about a dare, something about Jay's mouth running faster than his brain, the usual. What was important was the winning part for Sunghoon.
It was Sunghoon against Sunoo in the semi-final round.
"Go win this," Sunghoon said to Sunoo before they started, because he was a good sport. But he was also going to destroy him because Park Sunghoon had come out of the womb competitive. It didn't matter that Kim Sunoo was pretty. A win was a win.
Sunghoon had fast hands and good eyes. Figure skating had done something useful to his reflexes. He scored the first three points before Sunoo had fully figured out his grip, and from that on he was scoring like a breeze.
"You really want to win, huh."
"Yeah!" Sunghoon agreed cheerfully. He tracked the puck back to center. "I thought that was kind of the point."
"I thought you might let me win."
Sunghoon considered this for a genuinely sincere half-second. "No," he concluded, and slammed the puck home for point 7.
Sunoo looked up at him briefly and pouted a little. Sunghoon didn't catch it.
"Let's go! WOOOOOO! I WON!"
Sunghoon hit the bodybuilder pose. Jake dabbed him. Jay got him in a headlock. The three of them launched into a sincere rendition of We Are The Champions, Sunghoon being the loudest because he had the most to celebrate.
He was in the middle of accepting this entirely deserved reception when Jay's elbow found his ribs.
"What—" Sunghoon elbowed him back.
Jay did it again. Pointed with his eyes.
"Why?" Sunghoon asked again. "What's your problem?"
"Look at Sunoo, are you stupid?"
Across the air hockey table, Sunoo was pouting and sulking. He didn't think Sunoo would care about winning.
Oh no.
Sunghoon crossed the arcade in four steps. "Sorry—" He grabbed Sunoo's head before he'd figured out what he was going to do with it.
His hands bracketed Sunoo's face, squishing his cheeks together. Sunoo's mouth puckered like a fish.
"What?"
Sunghoon's mouth opened with conviction. "My bad. The final. I'm going to win it for you. I'll dedicate it to you."
"I'm sorry?"
"Okay? Okay." He released Sunoo's face, pointed at him, then tapped his own chest twice. "This one is for you…"
Sunghoon went up against Jungwon for the final.
Jungwon was doing a thing with his body. He was crouched low, both arms raised and fingers spread. It was unclear what the thing was taxonomically. Some kind of pre-game movement that involved his whole body. It was either meant to be a threatening move to scare off predators or a mating call.
Sunghoon watched him from across the table for a long moment, then leaned slowly sideways toward Jay. "This is coming from a place of love and concern for you, what the fuck do you even see in this guy."
Sunghoon straightened up. He looked at Jungwon, who had escalated the body thing. He shook his head once, like clearing water from his ears, and picked up the mallet.
Sunghoon won. Of course. He spun around, found Sunoo instantly and pointed at him. He tapped his own chest, the same two taps as before. "For you..."
Jungwon was sprinting across the sand being actively hunted by three people in his version of chase tag. Jay had somehow gotten Jungwon on his back mid-chase and was now galloping after Jake, who shrieked with genuine fear for his life. It was one of those stupid gags Jay did in the specific hope that someone would laugh. It only worked on Jungwon though. Jungwon was laughing, clutching Jay's shoulders, screaming at him to go faster.
Sunghoon watched them from the wooden bench with the campfire going and absolutely no plans to move.
Sunoo dropped down next to him with a bag of chips and followed his eyeline out to the beach.
"Do you want to join?" Sunghoon asked.
"That genuinely looks horrifying." Sunoo opened the bag. "Jake is going to die."
"Jake is fine."
"Jake is screaming."
"He screams like that when he's happy."
Sunoo considered this. "That's a concerning thing to know about someone."
"You get used to it."
Sunghoon had found a stick somewhere and was now holding a marshmallow over the fire with ultra focus, tongue pressed slightly against his bottom lip. Sunoo watched him from the side. The marshmallow caught flame. Sunghoon blew it out. The marshmallow was burnt black on one side and completely raw on the other.
Sunghoon looked genuinely disappointed. "It looked easier in cartoons."
"You have to hold it further from the flame," Sunoo instructed. "And rotate it."
Sunghoon began slowly rotating his entire hand at the wrist.
Sunoo stared at him. "What are you doing."
"Rotating it."
"The stick, Sunghoon. Rotate the stick."
"I'm rotating the stick."
"You're rotating your hand."
"My hand is attached to the stick."
Sunoo deadpanned, "How are you even an athlete."
"I started young," Sunghoon said seriously. "Like 4." He tried rotating the stick like Sunoo told him to and it worked. "Wow, you're right."
Sunoo laughed and Sunghoon got lost in how pretty Sunoo looked.
The marshmallow caught fire again.
Sunghoon sighed and dropped the stick, reached directly into the marshmallow bag, and put one in his mouth. Then he sat there watching the fire, chewing, completely at peace with this outcome.
"You're just going to—" Sunoo stared at him. Sunghoon held the bag out. "Oh, I'm getting one too. Thank you."
Sunoo took one and put it in his mouth. Out on the beach, Jungwon had fallen off Jay's back entirely and was now just lying in the sand laughing.
Sunoo shuddered a little and wrapped his arms around himself. "I'm cold."
Sunoo was wearing a flannel shirt with no jacket or any layer underneath—just the flannel with the first two buttons unbuttoned.
"Yeah," Sunghoon said, watching the fire. "It's pretty cold tonight." A pause. "Why'd you only wear a shirt?"
Sunoo stopped rubbing his arms and if Sunghoon could guess, he was glaring at him.
"Usually," Sunoo said, rubbing his arms, "people offer their jacket when I say I'm cold."
Sunghoon obediently pulled up his hoodie.
"What are you—okay, stop, stop—why don't you have anything underneath?"
Sunghoon looked down at his own bare torso and chiseled abs. Correct, he did not. But Sunoo said he was cold, so.
"...Do you want it or not."
Sunoo covered his face with both hands. Then, after a moment, his fingers spread slightly to peek through. "Wow," he muttered to himself. "That's amazing."
"Cute hoodie," Jungwon said in passing as he ran to get more snacks. Sunoo smiled and looked down at the sleeves that went past his hands. Sunghoon even more, because Sunoo was wearing his hoodie.
Sunghoon hadn't sat shirtless at a public beach for the entire night. He had cornered Jay right after Sunoo took the hoodie and said, with great calm, give me your fucking shirt this is a very vulnerable moment for me. To which Jay responded, geez here put your tits away.
Somewhere on this beach Jay was shivering in his thin t-shirt but Sunghoon couldn't care less.
They gathered back around the campfire. Jay had grabbed his guitar and was playing something slow and meandering that wasn't quite any real song. Jungwon was humming along anyway. Jake told him they didn't fit. Jungwon told Jake he was tone deaf. Jake told Jungwon that was literally not what tone deaf meant.
"Jake shut up. Let Jungwon sing," Jay said, and started playing something everyone actually knew, and then Jungwon was singing it properly, and then Jake was singing too despite himself, and then somehow everyone was a little bit.
Sunghoon was not singing. Sunghoon was sitting with his elbows on his knees, watching the fire.
Sunoo yawned next to him. His eyes watered and he had to press the back of his hand to his mouth.
"Tired?" Sunghoon asked.
"No," Sunoo said, and yawned again immediately.
Sunghoon was talking to Jake about something—he couldn't even remember what after, something about tomorrow's flight back—when Sunoo's weight shifted against his arm. Then his head dropped onto Sunghoon's shoulder.
Sunghoon stopped mid-sentence.
Jake also. "Oh. Wow."
Jake bit back a squeal. He yanked out his phone and started taking pictures and Sunghoon pressed his lips together in excitement, he didn't believe this kind of miracle happened to him.
Sunghoon mouthed, I want those.
Jake gave an OK sign.
Sunghoon barely breathed. He went very still, like when a cat fell asleep on his lap and he didn't want it to wake up because he didn't want it to be over. Sunoo's hair was against his jaw and his hands were still buried in the hoodie sleeves, the cuffs curled into loose fists in his lap, and he was completely, deeply asleep.
Sunghoon carried Sunoo on his back across the hotel lobby, up the stairs, all the way to their room. Sunoo's chin was hooked over his shoulder. His eyes kept closing. He was still wearing Sunghoon's hoodie, the sleeves pooling past his hands where they were loosely clasped around Sunghoon's neck.
"Sorry," Sunoo mumbled, for the third time.
"You keep saying that."
"I'm heavy."
"I'm an athlete. I have a good core and leg strength."
Sunoo chuckled. His grip loosened, then tightened again as he startled himself awake. "Thank you." He yawned directly into Sunghoon's ear. "Sorry for that."
Sunghoon unlocked their room and pushed the door open with his foot.
He got Sunoo to the bed and rolled off his back and onto the mattress. Sunoo settled against the pillow with his eyes still mostly closed. The hoodie had ridden up on one side. He didn't fix it.
Sunghoon also lay down beside Sunoo, staring at the ceiling.
"The bet," Sunoo mumbled.
Sunghoon looked at him. "What bet?"
"Air hockey. We had a bet."
"Will you be mad at me if I say I don't remember what the prize was?"
Sunoo looked at him. Both eyes open now.
"I was focused on winning," Sunghoon reasoned. "Sorry, I really wanted to win. It was important to me."
"A dare. The prize was a dare. And since you gave the win to me—" Sunoo smiled and booped Sunghoon's nose. "—that means I get to pick the dare."
That did sound like something he'd agreed on. "What do you want?"
Sunoo did a quiet thinking for a moment. It felt like he'd already known and was just deciding whether to say it or not.
"You never talk to me at school."
"Well…" Sunghoon never had a reason to talk to Sunoo. Their lives didn't really intersect there. He hadn't thought about it before. He was thinking about it now. "Do you want me to talk to you at school?"
Sunoo hummed. "Can you?"
"I can do that."
Sunoo gave him a sleepy smile and curled onto his side, and somehow ended up putting his head on Sunghoon's arm. The hoodie swallowed him a little. Sunghoon tried to focus on not doing something clinically stupid like hugging him right here right now.
His eyes fluttered shut. "Goodnight, Sunghoon."
10 minutes later, Sunghoon's arm was trapped under Sunoo's head for good and it was getting numb but he refused to move it. If the arm died, it died. Heroes made sacrifices.
"Goodnight, Sunoo."
Sunoo never returned Sunghoon's hoodie.
Sunoo had not gotten it back after the trip and had simply continued wearing it like it was already his.
Sunghoon spotted it on his way to the dining hall when Sunoo came out of his classroom with his friends. Sunghoon turned and pressed his back against the wall. Then he slid down it slightly. Then he pushed off it and spun on his heel, Princess and the Pauper-ing his way at this excellent news from the universe.
He caught his own reflection in the classroom window. Pointed at it. "You lucky motherfucker." He could not stop cheesing. He put both hands on his hips, looked up at the ceiling, and exhaled through his nose with solemn gratitude. "I knew you would come through."
"Your family is atheist," Jay said, from directly behind him.
Sunghoon didn't hear him. "Love is in the air, Jay." He inhaled deeply. "I can smell it."
The dining hall was loud and full and Sunoo was at one of the center tables with his friends. The hoodie sleeves past his hands were still as adorable as the first time Sunghoon saw them.
Sunghoon sat down with Jay and Jake at a vacant table. Across the dining hall, Sunoo glanced up. Their eyes met. Sunoo's lips curved into a smile. Sunghoon felt something smug and warm bloom in his chest. He waved back, a little shy about it, which was insane because he was not a shy person, and yet he was mock-ducking his head completely smitten.
"Stop it," Jay said. "You look insane."
"I can't. Sunoo is waving at me."
Jay smacked him into looking at his back. "No, man. He's waving at him."
The dining hall doors were open because the person walking through had pushed them wide with both hands just to let himself through.
Gyuvin. Sunoo's ex-boyfriend.
Jay quietly reached over and pulled Sunghoon's still-raised hand down.
Gyuvin crossed the dining hall with his unsettlingly long legs and dropped into the seat beside Sunoo. They talked. Sunghoon watched. Gyuvin's eyes dropped to the hoodie. He reached out and grabbed the fabric. Inspected it. Sunoo said something. Gyuvin did not look happy about the answer.
Gyuvin's eyes found Sunghoon across the room and pointed at him with his index finger.
He beelined toward Sunghoon that frankly felt psychologically traumatizing when you see a 188cm man striding toward you with his index finger out like a missile.
Gyuvin stopped directly in front of Sunghoon's table, and looked down at him.
"You. Come out."
"Okay, what the fuck is this."
Before Sunghoon, Gyuvin stood at the center of the basketball court. And beside him were Yunho, Sungchan, Shinyu, and Eunho—each of them approximately 180-something cm wet dream, standing in a line with their arms crossed.
"If you want to ask Sunoo out," Gyuvin declared, "you need to face us first."
Sunghoon angled his ear forward. "Sorry, what?"
"You need to beat Sunoo's exes."
Sunghoon pointed at Eunho, the one with white hair and red eyes, who was not even real, "HE'S A FUCKING CARTOON!"
"I am an animated hologram," Eunho corrected. "And for the fucking record, I am a real person."
"How did you and Sunoo even—you know what? I don't want to know. Why do any of you even care?"
Yunho inhaled sharply, one hand to his chest. "That's strike one, man."
Sunghoon turned to Jay. "What is happening right now."
"I genuinely don't know," Jay said flatly, distracted by Eunho's animation. "This one's on you."
"THIS IS AWESOME!" Jake shrieked from his other side, both fists in the air.
A ripple went through the crowd circling the court. Jang Wonyoung pushed through the last row of spectators and slotted herself into the lineup beside the four exes. She was tall enough that she didn't even slightly ruin whatever visual they were going for right there.
Sunghoon stared. "Whose girlfriend are you and why are you here?"
Wonyoung flicked her hair. "Dude?"
He turned to find Sunoo standing between Sunghoon and his entire lineup of ex-boyfriends. "Can you explain to me what's happening?"
Sunoo's smile was awkward and a little guilty and not at all sorry. "So—"
"Basketball," Gyuvin interrupted.
"Basketball," Sunoo confirmed. "You have to beat my exes in basketball to ask me out."
He pointed at Wonyoung. "Her too?"
"It was a phase," Sunoo confessed. "My straight phase. A very dark moment in my life."
"Oh, okay."
Sunghoon figured calling them 𝖊𝖛𝖎𝖑 (ex) 𝖇𝖔𝖞𝖋𝖗𝖎𝖊𝖓𝖉𝖘 didn't cover it anymore and evil ex-partners didn't pack the same punch but omitting her from this felt sexist. So he decided to go with Sunoo's 𝖊𝖛𝖎𝖑 (ex) 𝖇𝖔𝖞𝖋𝖗𝖎𝖊𝖓𝖉𝖘 and 𝕵𝖆𝖓𝖌 𝖂𝖔𝖓𝖞𝖔𝖚𝖓𝖌.
"You know this is unfair, right," he said. "This is five against one. Six if you count that cartoon motherfucker but I am sure he can't bend physics and touch the basketball. Anyway, I only have three people."
"Three?" Jay panicked. "What? When did I agree to—I don't play sport, man, I don't—"
Gyuvin shrugged. "Then find two more."
A hand shot up from the crowd. Riki slid out from the second row. "I'm in."
Sunghoon counted him in. "Great. That's four."
"I also want to ask Sunoo out," Riki added pleasantly. "So if we win, I'm asking him out instead."
Sunghoon was offended. "No way, man. You gotta let him choose."
"May the best man win." Riki shrugged. "I'm still a better teammate than Jay."
"Excuse me—" Jay started.
"I'm in too," Heeseung said, stepping out from the other side of the crowd.
"You want to ask Sunoo out too?"
Heeseung pointed at Yunho with his whole arm extended. "That guy slept with my mom."
A beat of silence passed over the court.
"...Okay," Sunghoon said. "Welcome to the team."
Sunghoon had hoped it would be his movie moment where he learned he was secretly good at the sport he hated so much. He undoubtedly had a good foundation in sport that made him remotely hopeful of the outcome, but his hand-eye coordination checked out the moment there was a ball in the equation.
The first two minutes confirmed it.
Sunghoon dribbled directly into his own knee, lost the ball to Gyuvin without being touched, and at one point just stood in the wrong half of the court for an extended period because he was confused seeing too many people moving inside the court. Jay wasn't any better, he'd been playing dodgeball by himself.
Fortunately, the other three were doing fine.
He hadn't accounted for Wonyoung, however. She was scarily good at this. She drove past him so fast that he spun a full 180 and had to take a moment to collect himself.
"Stay on her!" Heeseung yelled, sprinting past him.
"NO. I don't think I can. This sport is SCARY."
The game started physical and got more physical. Sungchan fouled Jake by catching him mid-layup with a forearm to the chest that sent Jake horizontal through the air for a full second before he hit the ground and rolled. Heeseung and Yunho had a whole separate situation happening on the left side of the court shoving each other. Riki was scoring and looking cool for the crowd (that motherfucker).
Sunghoon contributed by existing on the court and occasionally being in the right place by accident, which at least forced the other team to account for him spatially.
The score pulled even with two minutes left. Then one minute. Then thirty seconds. Then it was tied, one point each from winning.
Before him, Riki called for the ball. Jake passed it. The ball ricocheted across the court and hit Sunghoon directly in the face.
He went down. The ball bounced off his face and dropped cleanly through the hoop.
Sunghoon was face-down on the court.
He heard the joyous scream and peeled himself off the asphalt. He looked at the ball, his team, then lastly Sunoo who was jumping and hugging Jungwon.
Riki had both arms in the air, Jake hugged Riki and buried his face in Riki's sweaty chest, Heeseung punched Yunho.
Sunghoon finally realized they won and shrieked, "WE WOOOOON."
"MAN!" Jay yelled "MAN, MAN—YOUR TOOTH—"
"Jay, my man. WE WOOOON!"
"Idiot, FOCUS." Jay was holding something up between two fingers. Sunghoon squinted at it.
It was a tooth.
Sunghoon looked down at his shirt. Then he understood why it felt wet. Blood was soaking through the front of it, oozing freely from his mouth. Sunghoon touched his mouth and grinned with one tooth lighter. "WE WOOOOON."
Eunho stood in silence beneath a small, self-contained animated cloud raining onto his head.
Sunoo appeared from the crowd holding a glass of milk.
"Your tooth is in here." Sunoo held it up. The tooth was visible at the bottom of the glass. "You can reattach it if we get to a dentist fast enough."
The hoodie was spotted with what was probably Sunghoon's blood from when he'd grabbed his face to check on him thirty seconds ago. Sunghoon didn't care about that, he had a much more pressing matter in hand.
"Did Riki ask you out yet?"
"Yes."
Sunghoon wanted to cry. "Did you say yes?"
Sunoo smiled for suspense, then shook his head. Sunghoon glanced to his right and found Riki watching them with arms crossed, rolling his eyes with his whole body. Sunghoon raised his middle finger at him. Then switched to a finger heart and a wink. Riki recoiled.
"So," Sunghoon said, turning back. "Do you—do you want to go to the dance with me?"
Sunoo stepped forward, looped both arms around his neck, and kissed him.
HOLY SHITTTTTTTTTTTTTT
Sunoo pulled back. "How's that for a yes?"
"Amazing…"
"I tasted blood."
"Yeah, that's the tooth thing, sorry."
"Sunghoon." Sunoo grabbed his hand, pulling him toward the exit, milk glass in the other hand. "We have a sixty minute window to reattach your tooth."
"Okay—"
"We've already wasted twenty."
"THEN WHY DID YOU KISS ME—"
"Because I wanted to." Sunoo smiled sweetly over his shoulder.
Sunghoon blushed. "Aw… Really?"
"Come on. Let's reattach that tooth."
Sunghoon let himself be pulled across the basketball court one tooth short, and smiling so wide it probably made the bleeding worse.
Jay turned to Jake. "He didn't even score once. The ball bounced off his face and Riki scored it."
Jake watched them go, hand over his heart. "Greatest player of all time. The real winner. So cool."
This was Sunghoon's first dance because he couldn't attend every other time before. Everything looked and sounded cool to him. It reminded him of seeing Lotte World for the first time.
"They have a fountain drink machine," he said, with genuine reverence.
"Yes, we do. I booked that."
The DJ was local and obscure. Which Jay insisted was cool and edgy. But Sunghoon knew it was just someone's cousin's friend with Spotify playlist who needed the gig for quick cash.
Sunoo pulled him to dance. Sunghoon for the life of him couldn't dance at all. He had the grace of a figure skater but none of the coolness of a teenage boy.
He did the bodybuilder pose. He did the shoulder shimmy. He pointed at Sunoo mid-move with joy. "IS THIS HOW YOU DO IT? WATCH THIS ONE—" He did triple axel on the solid ground. Which Sunoo found genuinely impressive.
Sunghoon was on his third plate of snacks and mid-sentence about the mini quiches when Sunoo grabbed his hand and pulled.
"Where are we—"
"Photobooth."
Sunoo pulled him into the photobooth in the corner and the curtain fell shut behind them. How did anyone even fit here? It was very small in there. Sunoo did something to the screen to set them up and it was counting down.
10... 9... 8... 7...
"Okay, we should—" Sunghoon started, reaching up to fix his hair.
"Let's kiss," Sunoo said.
6... 5... 4...
"Oh," Sunghoon said. "Yeah, that makes—yeah, okay, that's a good—"
Sunoo kissed him.
3... 2... 1...
The flash went off. Then the second flash. Then the third and fourth. A perfect sequence captured in frames: Sunoo kissing Sunghoon while his mouth was still rounded in a stunned little "o," mid sentence, Sunghoon kissing Sunoo back or at least trying to do his best because he didn't know what he was doing, Sunghoon with his eyes still closed after it ended, and then Sunghoon opening his eyes while Sunoo was laughing out of his mind.
Sunghoon walked backward across the school court, with one hand in his pocket and the photostrip in the other, tilted toward the streetlight. He looked at it for the fifth time since they'd left the booth.
"Have I told you that you're really pretty?"
"That's literally all you ever say."
"Because it keeps being true." Sunghoon lowered the strip and looked at him directly. "Hehe."
The cold hit properly as they moved away from the building. Sunoo pulled his arms in.
"Are you cold? I wear another jacket underneath this. Jacketception. I'm prepared," Sunghoon offered, pulling his jacket off one shoulder to show Sunoo proudly.
Sunoo took a second at the jacket and wheezed into his hand. "Sure thing."
Sunghoon put it around Sunoo's shoulders, very pleased with himself. He looked at the photostrip again and flashed a toothy grin. "Can I kiss you again?"
Sunoo's eyes already did a crescent and he bit his lip trying not to smile about it. He went up on his toes, eyes already closing, aiming for a peck. But Sunghoon found the small of his back and dipped him full in a back arching kiss. Sunoo yelped, one hand curling into the front of Sunghoon's shirt.
Sunghoon brought him back up slowly.
"Was that necessary?"
"I've always wanted to do that," Sunghoon said with complete sincerity. "It always looks so cool."
Sunoo tucked his face into Sunghoon's shoulder. "What am I gonna do with you?"
"How was it?" Sunghoon asked, chin resting on top of his head. "The kiss. For you, I mean. Was it good? I feel like it was good."
"It was nice."
"Nice…." he repeated. "Can I ask something? Out of curiosity."
"Okay."
"If someone else wanted to ask you out. Would you make them beat me in basketball too?"
Sunoo considered it thoughtfully, or pretended like it. "Who knows."
"Also, can you tell me about Eunho—how did that happen—"
"The possibility of technology is endless, Sunghoon."
