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“Minjun just broke up with me.”
Soleum doesn’t look up. “Minjun? Isn’t that the one from the aquarium?”
“No,” Saheon clicks his tongue. “That was Seojun. This is the one from the amusement park.”
“You’re still seeing him?” He grimaces.
“Not anymore.”
Saheon sighs, dramatic, and tosses his phone across the bed.
“Hey.”
“Don’t bother me. I’m mourning.” His voice is muffled from where he’s buried his face in his arms.
“Nobody died,” Soleum says blankly.
“I’m mourning a potential future. And all the money I could’ve gotten out of having a boyfriend.”
“Why don’t we date?”
Saheon’s head shoots up at the words. He leans up on his elbows, peering at Soleum with one, wide eye.
“...What?” When no reply comes, he dares laugh. “Aha, haha… funny, Soleum-ssi.”
“Let’s date,” he repeats, undeterred. “You’re not in it for love, so what’s the issue?”
Saheon—finally realizing Soleum is, in fact, serious—shudders. “That doesn’t mean I wanna throw away my dignity!”
“You’re already throwing away your dignity.” He rolls his eyes. “This is the fifth guy this month.”
“That’s different,” Saheon scoffs.
“It’s not.” Soleum replies, unbothered, but doesn’t push otherwise.
A beat of silence passes.
“...But, like, if I was your boyfriend… What would you give me?”
“Can you try to hide your hustling tendencies for five seconds?” Soleum comments, thoroughly unimpressed.
“No, I just mean—” his face flushes a delectable red. “If we were a thing, what would we do? How would that even work?”
“Um.” Soleum has never been in a relationship, so he’d be best off guessing. “We’d go out places.”
“Would you pay?”
Predictable. A bastard, yes, but predictable.
“Well, it’s only fair, right? Since I’m the one who asked you out,” he smiles anyway.
Saheon stares at him.
“I have a condition.”
He raises an eyebrow. “Oh? By all means.”
Saheon’s remaining eye narrows dangerously. “I wanna rub this in Go Yeongeun-ssi’s face later.”
Soleum is taken aback.
“...Okay, but Yeongeun-ssi is the nicest person ever?”
“That’s an overgeneralization.” Saheon crosses his arms, sitting up properly.
Soleum can definitely recall some of Yeongeun’s intimidating moments… but she’s still one of his closest friends. He’s just glad to be on her good side.
Saheon’s grudge doesn’t make sense to him though. But, Saheon doesn’t really get along with anyone.
“Oh, and we have to celebrate every week anniversary.”
“Every week?” Soleum frowns.
“Yes, every week.”
Go figures—Saheon is as opportunistic as ever.
Soleum sighs. “Then, will you be my boyfriend, Saheon-ssi?”
“Yeah, sure. Whatevs.” He waves his hand dismissively.
‘Romance is dead,’ Soleum realizes, belatedly.
“But I’m gonna be the most toxic boyfriend ever,” Saheon decides, a wicked smile crossing his soft features.
Well, anything to make their office lives more interesting, Soleum supposes.
“Eh, I could be more toxic than you.” He feigns indifference.
“Is that a challenge, Soleum-ssi?” Saheon asks, sickeningly sweet.
“Hm,” he hums. “‘Soleum’ is fine. We’re dating after all.”
They hold hands on their way to work the next day.
True to his word, the first thing Saheon does when they get there is smile widely at Yeongeun, proudly displaying he and Soleum’s interlocked hands.
Yeongeun gasps and covers her mouth with her hand, face paling considerably.
“Hah,” Saheon snickers.
“I think you have issues,” Soleum mutters.
“Shh, let me enjoy this,” he whispers back, stopping in place.
Soleum pauses, glancing back curiously.
Before he can blink, he feels Saheon’s arms wrapping around his neck.
Soleum freezes. Isn’t it too soon for a kiss?
But Saheon doesn’t kiss him. Instead, he presses his face against Soleum’s shoulder and giggles, one foot lifted off of the ground.
“Thank you for walking me today, Soleum-ah. ♡”
Hey, what the fuck? Did he get possessed?
Soleum hears choking behind him. Yeongeun-ssi!?
“Ah, of course,” he rests his palm on the small of Saheon’s back.. Resting his head against Saheon’s, he murmurs, “aren’t we supposed to be toxic?”
“Oh, you’re right.” Saheon perks up.
Unlinking his arms from around Soleum’s neck, Saheon pushes him back by the chest—albeit softly. “Don’t hug me back, whore!”
Soleum blinks rapidly. He almost laughs—but he manages not to break character.
“I’m the whore? Five guys, Saheon. In the past month.”
“Don’t slut-shame me—!”
Soleum covers Saheon’s mouth with his hand before he can get too loud. As funny as this is, he’d rather not get a workplace complaint.
“But you called me a whore first?” He sighs, long and drawn out. “Your mood swings are really volatile, you know.”
“They are not.”
“Anything you say.” Soleum smiles, pulling his hand back and patting Saheon on the shoulder. “I’ll see you after work, Saheon-ie.”
Soleum brushes past him feeling a bit more energized than before. Who knew acting with his roommate-turned-boyfriend would wake him up so easily?
…He’ll explain everything to Yeongeun-ssi later over coffee.
As soon as Soleum enters the breakroom for lunch, someone pins his arms to his back.
“I don’t have any money, I’m an underpaid corporate worker—” he goes into his pre-planned speech, in case he ever got mugged, on instinct.
A familiar sigh comes from behind him.
Wait a minute.
“Jin Nasol?” He asks, being steered out of the room.
“And Lee Seonghae!” A sing-song voice chimes in. When did she get here…?
“Resistance is futile.” Nasol says, finally pushing him into a storage closet.
“Excuse me,” Soleum braces himself against the wall, managing to stay upright. “This is kidnapping.”
Nasol and Seonghae join him inside, closing the door.
Someone’s phone lights up the space, illuminating their faces like they’re meant to be telling ghost stories in the dark. A cold sweat settles on the back of his neck.
“You and Baek Saheon. When.” Nasol glares.
He blanches. “Last night?”
Nasol and Seonghae make brief eye contact, before turning back to him.
“Is he threatening you, Soleum-ssi?” Seonghae tilts her head.
“No, I asked him out.”
“Why,” is all Nasol says.
“What do you see in him?” Even Seonghae sounds a little disturbed.
“Um,” fuck, what does he see in Baek Saheon? “He has soft hair.”
“Oh my God.”
“...Soleum-ssi, you’re a good person, riight? So I don’t think you and Baek Saheon-ssi are a good idea. You know, he’s a little…”
Nasol interjects, “off his rocker.”
“He’s not that bad.” He is absolutely that bad. “You used to be intimidating too, Manager Jin.”
“Used to?” Nasol lifts an eyebrow.
“Soleum-ssi, Baek Saheon-ssi blackmailed a supervisor and got him fired because he had to work overtime once.”
“Nobody likes overtime.” Soleum knows better than anyone how awful Saheon’s personality is. This isn’t about defending Saheon—it’s about defending his own decision making skills!
“You can’t be serious.”
“Look, not that we don’t trust you…” Seonghae smiles. “But I~~ just think good people should be with good people, you knoww?”
“Right…”
Nasol sighs, messing up Soleum’s hair roughly. He yelp as she ruffles it, unhappy with the realization he’ll have to fix it before leaving.
“You have terrible taste in men.”
“Can I put out a cigarette on your neck?” Saheon asks wth far too much confidence.
“You don’t smoke.” Soleum reminds him, dryly.
“Yeah, but I’m not letting you put one out on my neck.” He scoffs.
“What, why not? They’re my cigarettes.”
“Yeah, well, I told you to stop smoking when we moved in together,” Saheon huffs. “So it’s fair.”
Soleum did try—but he didn’t last long. Turns out that being an office worker, smoking is commonplace.
“You’re at least 20% of the reason I smoke. Take responsibility.”
Saheon bats his eyelashes. “You think of me that much? That’s kind of pathetic—”
“I burn myself and you lick the mark. Take it or leave it.”
“...What the fuck? I’m not putting my tongue on you.” Saheon’s face twists into an unsightly expression.
“Do you want to be toxic for each other or not?” Soleum says, unimpressed.
Saheon is silent for a few seconds, as if he’s weighing his options. Eventually, he sighs. “I’ll get your lighter.”
“It’s on the counter,” Soleum supplies. As Saheon scurries off in the direction of the kitchen, he calls, “hey, and no biting—you’re not a dog.”
“What??” Saheon looks back over his shoulder, betrayed. “That’s the best part though!?!?”
“Suffer.”
Soleum is cornered by Eun Haje and Park Minseong upon entering the office.
“Did he do something to you?” Haje asks, hands on Soleum’s shoulders.
Minseong speaks up, shifting from foot to foot behind her like an anxious puppy. “Sunbae, I don’t think we should jump him.”
“He’s our youngest,” she bites back, firm. “It’s our job.”
“...I’m sorry, what’s happening?” Soleum looks between his senior employees with a blank expression.
“Everyone’s saying you got in a fight with Baek Saheon yesterday,” Haje explains, tense. “That guy’s a total suck-up, but he’s ruthless. If something’s going on, you can talk to—”
“You mean my boyfriend?”
……
Haje, wide-eyed, slowly takes a step back.
“Boyfriend?” Minseong echoes with a disbelieving smile.
“Yes,” Soleum confirms. “My boyfriend, Baek Saheon.”
“Since when?” Haje sounds increasingly disturbed.
“Two days ago,” Soleum replies. It makes Haje’s expression twist even more painfully.
“I heard he called you a whore and shoved you in the main entrance.” She says carefully—slowly, as though she’s talking to someone unwell.
“That’s also true.”
“Maybe that’s just their dynamic…?” Minseong chimes in for damage control. “Soleum-ah might like that?”
“...Minseong.” Haje pinches the bridge of her nose.
“I mean, I’d be fine with it too,” he continues, evidently trying to be supportive. A very well-intentioned golden retriever. “So I understand, Soleum-ah. It’s okay.”
“Ah, Sunbae…” Soleum mutters, flatly.
“Buddy, we don’t need to hear about your kinks.” Haje turns and pets Minseong on the head, sympathetic.
He flushes down to his neck and retreats to the far side of the room.
“Kim Soleum-ssi,” a deep voice comes from behind.
“Sir,” he and Haje both straighten up at the same time.
Turning around, he meets Lee Jaheon’s handsome, red eyes.
“We respect your decisions,” Jaheon drones. “But I must ask if everything is okay.”
Soleum actually feels a little touched…
“Yes, sir,” he nods. “Saheon-ssi is nothing I can’t handle.”
“Very well.” Jaheon’s gaze sweeps up and down his form, checking if everything is in working order. Deeming Soleum healthy, he walks past to his desk.
Soleum hears Haje sigh, deep and unrestrained, beside him.
Wait, now that he thinks about it…
“Assistant manager,” he speaks up. “You mentioned ‘everyone said’ I got into a fight with Saheon-ssi?”
“Oh, yeah.” Haje rolls her shoulders, pointedly looking anywhere but him. “Minseong—would you make me a cup too?” She calls.
Minseong, lingering by the coffee machine, agrees. “Ah, yes, Sunbae!”
...Am I the topic of an office rumor?
“Hey, we’ve been dating for one week now,” Saheon informs him that Friday night, the minute the clock hits 12:00 and bleeds over into Saturday.
“And so we have.”
Saheon leans over his shoulder, wrapping his arms around his waist from behind.
“So, where are you taking me for our first anniversary?”
“...A restaurant?” He responds, uncertainly.
“I’m on a diet.”
Soleum scrunches up his nose. “What, why?”
“Me and Heowoon-ssi decided to go on one together.” Ah, one of the few people Saheon tolerates. He’s a good guy—Soleum also gets along with him.
“Okay,” he tries again, “we could go bowling.”
“Do I look like I’m into bowling?” Saheon deadpans. “Not that I couldn’t beat you. I would kick your ass at bowling.”
Soleum sincerely doubts that.
“A cooking class.”
Saheon narrows his eye. “That just sounds like you’re insulting me.”
“Maybe I am,” he hums, a slight smile tugging at his lips.
“Hey!” Saheon groans.
“Hmm.”
Taking his phone from his pocket, Soleum navigates to the search engine, scrolling to check something. Saheon tries to peek at the screen—nosy—but Soleum blocks him before he’s able, ignoring the offended look he gets in response.
“An escape room,” he says finally.
Saheon blinks.
“You wanna be detectives for our anniversary?”
“A murder mystery escape room.”
To be honest, Soleum would probably be terrified. But it’s something Saheon would like.
While Soleum is distracted, Saheon takes the chance to snatch his phone, tapping his nails against the side as he scrutinizes the listing.
“Will you buy me a gift too?” He asks, looking up.
Soleum sighs.
“Is my love not enough for you?”
“Absolutely not.” Saheon answers without a beat.”
“You’re right. That’s cringe.”
