Chapter Text
The first thing Maomao noticed when she came to was the incessant pulsing in her head.
She bit back a groan as she peeled open her eyes… or eye. For some reason her right one didn’t seem to be opening. Maomao squinted at the bright fuzzy light of the room as she reached a shaky hand up to touch the side of her face. A rough, unfamiliar texture met her finger tip, bandages. They wrapped over her eye and down her cheek, when had that happened?
”She’s awake!”
Maomao turned her head toward the voice, realizing that she wasn’t alone in the room for the first time.
Immediately she regretted it. The pounding in her head got harder as she was hit by a wave of dizziness, despite being laid down. Her eyes scanned the room, or tried to. Instead of one fluid motion they seemed to tick across her field of vision. Maomao fought through the fog in her head to make an assessment about her condition… concussion. That sounded right.
Her eyes fell on the source of the voice. A man, she thought by the sound of his voice. A beautiful man…who was looking at her with worry that looked wrong on his face. She didn’t get to study him for long though as an older woman stepped through the door behind him and began speaking.
“Xiaomao, how are you feeling? Are you thirsty?”
Maomao must’ve taken too long to answer as the man began speaking again.
“How did you know that would happen?” His voice was quiet and hoarse as he reached to squeeze her hand—with a bit too much force if you asked for Maomao’s humble opinion. The feeling of his calloused palm against hers was vaguely familiar.
Confusion hit Maomao like a wave, “Wh-” she cleared her throat, “What are you talking about?”
He made a face as his head quirked to the side, “In the temple… with the beam?”
”The temple? There aren’t any temples in the pleasure district as far as I’m aware of.”
”Apothecary,” how did he know who she was? “Where do you think you are right now?”
Maomao thought for a moment. She was on a bed that certainly felt much more lavish than her own, in a room that was elegant and ornate—it certainly wasn’t any room from the Verdigris House—with a man who she didn’t know but who seemed to know her. Maomao took the time to study him. He really was beautiful, almost in an inhuman way. Maomao knew that she wasn’t the best with names, but surely she’d remember a face like that? Her gaze dropped lower to his robes. They looked like fine silk. The only plausible explanation was that the granny had finally sold her off to someone and that this was the man in question.
Her brow furrowed, “We didn’t have sex, did we?”
Immediately flush flooded his cheeks, the act was an answer enough.
“N-no! Of course not! What made you think that?” The beautiful man stuttered, accusingly.
”Well, you purchased my contract, didn’t you?”
His face grew serious again, “Do you remember that?”
”No… it’s just the most logical explanation. I don’t remember you at all.”
Clearly that had been the wrong thing to say as dual looks of horror washed over the faces of the man and older woman.
Quickly he stood up, it was then that Maomao realized he had been kneeling the entire time. The man began whispering back and forth with the older woman. Maomao could only catch every third word.
“…hit by something…memory, perhaps?”
”…I’ll kill that guard…”
”…what about…physician?”
”here?…don’t think…”
”…her father…”
”Maybe…out there…far…concerned…ride…bumpy, you know?”
”What about…him here?”
”…can’t…not allowed…remember?”
The hurried voices made Maomao dizzy. It was then that another man entered the room, older this time.
“Master Jinshi, the emperor would like to hear a statement from her. Is she well enough to give it?”
The beautiful man—Jinshi—turned towards the new voice. Maomao couldn’t see the face he made but she guessed it wasn’t a good one based on the reaction from the older man. Dread began to pool in her stomach. She figured that there were things she wasn’t remembering based on the interrogation she’d been given. Just how important were they? How long had it been since she’d been bought out? Was her dad okay? The emperor wanted to speak with her, what? She felt sick.
She really did feel sick. Maomao’s breath came in short pants as she felt her body become slick with a cold sweat. She felt her mouth water, bile coating her throat as her stomach gave a threatening churn.
Sit up. Sit up…
Maomao shot up to lean over the side of the bed as the contents of her stomach emptied onto the floor. Her arms shook, weak under her own weight as she felt a wetness on her cheeks. Maomao’s stomach gave another cramp and she keeled back over to throw up again. Vaguely she registered a weight next to her on the bed and hands scooping her hair off of her neck.
Even after it was over, she stayed bent. Maomao let her mouth stay partially open allowing the drool to drip onto the floor, not wanting to taste the acid on her tongue.
The hand in her hair drifted down to her back, rubbing soothing circles into it.
“I’m sorry…” she whispered, still staring at the floor.
”There’s nothing to apologize for,” Jinshi said, moving his hand to rest on her shoulder.
—-
Maomao wasn’t quite sure how, but in a whirlwind of moving pieces, she found herself lying in a carriage with her head being held in Jinshi’s hands as it rested on his lap.
She figured that they were going to see a doctor, why there were none where they were was a mystery to her.
Maomao had carefully been scooped up by Jinshi and carried outside. He used one hand to shield her sensitive eyes from the light and he walked at a snail's pace so as not to jostle her too much.
Eventually they had reached an awaiting carriage which he climbed into and laid her down on one of the benches before drawing the curtains closed on the windows.
So here they sat, in complete darkness, in a position that was making her neck rather stiff.
“What is the purpose of this, Master Jinshi?”
He sighed, “So that your head doesn’t get bumped around, it’s already taken enough of a beating.”
Maomao sighed. It couldn’t be helped. Was this how he always was? Maomao was a little grateful to have forgotten the annoyance of it all. But… something about his embrace made her feel a bit warm inside, perhaps there was a touch of familiarity there after all. She shot him a glare, disregarding the fact that he technically owned her.
But… his reaction was odd. He seemed to glow under her scrutiny. What was he… some sort of masochist? It was starting to click to Maomao why he might’ve picked her over other possible courtesans…
”Master Jinshi, where exactly are we going?”
”Into the pleasure district… to see your father… “
”Luomen?”
”Yes, you remember him right?” He pushed.
”Yes…”
“Good…. Good. What else do you remember?”
”Hmmm…” Maomao hummed in thought, “I remember my sisters in the Verdigris House… and the old granny…” a shiver wracked her body at the thought of her.
“I also remember… that I’m an apothecary and I work with medicines… and poisons,” a grin split across her face, “…I do think I remember you a bit… not your face, but… you do feel kind of familiar I suppose.”
At that Jinshi gave her a weird look. A familiar one, though. It was something she recalled seeing on the faces of courtesans in the Verdigris house. When she’d asked her sisters about it they’d described it as “longing.” Maomao knew what the word meant in theory, but she never quite understood it. It was strange to have that look directed at her though…
“How much farther do we have to travel?” She asked, with a yawn.
“Not much longer, Maomao.”
There was silence for a minute before Maomao spoke again.
“You said that you bought me out, is that how we met?”
”No, no… we knew each other before that.”
”Oh… how did we meet?”
Jinshi hummed, “I’m not sure if I should tell you or let you remember on your own…”
”Well, what if I never remember?”
Jinshi was quiet for a beat, “…Is that possible?”
Maomao had to admit that the thought was less than pleasant, but it was possible.
“In some cases, yes. I believe I received blunt force trauma to the head resulting in concussion. There have been instances where patients report amnesia and have recovered their memory within a few days. For others… it never came back.”
”Well… let’s not speak it into existence.”
Maomao was never one for superstition, but she couldn’t find the energy to argue.
—-
It wasn’t long before the carriage had slowed down to a stop. Maomao was comforted by the fact that Jinshi hadn’t lied about the duration of the ride. At least he was trustworthy, though… she kind of already knew that.
This time, she insisted on walking in by herself. Maomao refused to be carried in front of her dad—much to Jinshi’s chagrin. They compromised and Maomao was able to walk in by herself with Jinshi’s support. Pain shot up her leg as she put weight on it, when had she injured that?
She mentally braced herself at the front door to the old apothecary’s shack. Maomao hoped he wouldn’t be too alarmed, she knew he had the pretensity to worry.
Finally, she took a deep breath and opened the door.
There he was, standing at the mortar and pestle, grinding up herbs just as she’d remembered he did. Her father turned at the noise, Luomen opened his mouth to greet her but stopped himself. He eyed Maomao up and down, then took in Jinshi’s figure as well.
“Oh, Maomao. You didn’t do this to yourself, did you?”
Maomao was a bit surprised. She knew that he was critical of her experimenting, but to think she’d do something of this level?
“No, of course not. I think I got into an accident.”
She noticed her father’s eyes sharpen a bit. Of course he was already piecing together her condition.
“Please, sit—the both of you. Tell me more of what happened.”
Luomen led the pair to a set of mats on the floor. Maomao glared at Jinshi as he supported her under her armpits, helping her with an easy descent. This time, he didn’t seem to bask in it, instead concentrating on his self-given task.
“So Maomao,” he looked at Jinshi for a moment, bowing his head in recognition, “What do you remember happening?”
Jinshi turned towards her, prompting her to explain. Like she needed support. Maomao rolled her eyes, again noticing how they refused to move smoothly.
“I remember you and my sisters and the Verdigris House. I remember medicine… and all the other fun aspects of it. The most recent thing I remember is waking up this morning with a headache surrounded by people who seem to know me that I have no recollection of.”
Luomen hummed, “So you remember nothing of the Rear Palace?”
”I remember its existence, yes.”
Her father turned to Jinshi and they exchanged a look.
Still looking at Jinshi, he asked, “Do you know what happened?”
”I don’t know everything, but I know part of it,” Jinshi sighed, “I was performing a cleansing ritual at one of the temples in the rear palace and I started to head this commotion coming from outside. I ignored it and focused on the ritual, but it was really distracting. Then, about halfway through, I hear footsteps coming up behind me—really urgent ones. And I- I was really confused because nobody else was supposed to be in there, but before I could turn around I was knocked to the side. And Maomao saved my life by doing that because I would’ve been crushed by a falling beam. I don’t know how she knew about it but she saved my life. And when I looked at her she looked… terrible. Her face was all swollen and the beam cut up her leg really bad, almost down to the bone. She was bleeding a lot too and lost consciousness soon after.”
Maomao couldn’t believe her ears. This didn’t sound like her at all. A hero? Her? He must be wrong… but he seemed so sure…
”Did the beam hit her head?”
”No sir, only her leg. I wasn’t there for it myself, but I think a guard hit her with a baton outside the temple. This is only hearsay though.”
Luomen nodded, thinking.
“It’s most likely a concussion. Sometimes that can cause minor memory loss. However, the amnesia could be caused by the blood loss as well. It’s not surprising that she’d be so affected by a combination of the two.”
“Sir, I have one question. Do you think she passed out from the concussion or the blood loss?”
Luomen shook his head, “It’s hard to say. It doesn’t truly matter, the treatment is the same. Rest. Make sure she doesn’t do anything cognitively draining. Small, easy, physical tasks may help if they are repetitive. Keeping a routine may help recover memory, especially if you were following one before. Try to allow her to recover her memory on her own. Remember, this type of amnesia may last for a few days or a few weeks. If Maomao isn’t fully better in twenty days, come back here.”
Jinshi nodded.
It wasn’t long after that they said their goodbyes and left. Maomao was happy to see her dad, especially because she apparently hadn’t seen him in months. They made small talk, but couldn’t do any catching up for obvious reasons. Maomao, who usually considered herself unemotional, couldn’t help but feel a little dejected. It felt like letting her father down.
She sighed as Jinshi helped her back into the carriage, not bothering to fight off his assistance.