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Everyone in the room, including those that were still hiding, snapped their heads over to where the sound had come from. The very distinct muffled thud of a body hitting a hardwood floor.
Hannah squeaked and jumped back slightly, not knowing what could have made that noise considering it was just her and Mike in the room-
-until groans and muttered curses sounded from under the bed and Emily’s sharp tone snapped, “For fuck’s sake, Ashley!”
The girl in question now lay face down on the floor, butt stuck in the air from behind the conveniently placed partition. She let out a muffled, drunken laugh and garbled something unintelligible into the ground, something that sounded along the lines of “Did we get her?”. The drink she’d insisted on bringing up with her – an electric blue concoction of some sort that Josh had made her before he and Chris passed out on the table downstairs – was glugging out onto the floor from her hand as she used it to attempt to push herself up off the ground, and fell spectacularly back onto her face.
Jess and Emily shuffled out from under the bed, both of them looking annoyed and started angrily brushing the dust off their clothes. Matt cracked the wardrobe door open, peaking the GoPro out as if it was his third eye and Mike spun on his heel, sighing with his hands on his hips, shaking his head and the downed redhead.
“Really, Ash? You couldn’t have held out for like, 5 fucking minutes?” Jessica snapped, but sounded more like a scolding mother than actually seething at the girl.
“I didn’t even get to see her boobs yet…” Mike whined, causing Jess to snap her head to him and growl out a “shut the fuck up, Mike”.
“Wh-What’s going on…? Mike?” Hannah stuttered, hands twitching close to her chest as she cautiously glanced at her other friends in the room. Mike spun again and sputtered uselessly, not knowing how to address the girl he’d pretended to seduce.
Matt, now fully out of the wardrobe, sheepishly rubbed the back of his neck, gesturing with the hand holding the GoPro, “We were, ah, we were gonna prank you, Han.”
“What?”
“Fucking Christ, Matt, you wouldn’t last 10 seconds in Guantanamo,” Mike shot back, furrowing his brows while Matt glared at him.
“What?” Hannah said again, voice quickly becoming more frustrated.
Emily tutted and quickly went to try and sit Ashley upright. She almost shrieked when she kneeled down directly into the puddle of cocktail that had just spilled all over the floor. She snatched the glass out of Ashley’s weakly grasping hand and sniffed the inside of it, immediately pulling a face.
“Holy shit, Ash, how much vodka did Josh put in this?” she muttered, mostly to herself as she firmly planted the glass next to her and pushed Ashley onto her side.
Jessica kneeled next to her and they both pulled their drunk friend up with minimal effort, slumping her against the wall. They both winced at the sight of the bloodied nose she now sported, most likely from accidently slamming her face against a wooden floor twice. Ashley blinked, as if trying to comprehend the sight of her friends before her and grinned lazily.
“Did we get ‘er, y’guys?”
From the hall, everyone in the room, sans Ashley and Hannah who was still trying to figure out what the hell was going on, turned to the sound of frantic footfalls getting closer before the guest bedroom door slammed open and a furious looking Sam stood on the other side of it. Her expression relaxed somewhat at the sight of Hannah and she immediately rushed to her side.
“Hannah! Honey, hey, are you okay? It’s just a prank.” Sam’s voice was calm even though her eyes scanned the others in the room with thinly veiled disappointment.
From her place on the floor Ashley giggled and called in a mockingly deep tone, “It’s just a prank, bro!” before cackling again.
“What prank? What’s going on?” Hannah fretted, sticking close to Sam as she let her eyes fall on each of the occupants of the room who were starting to look more and more embarrassed the more they were chastised.
There was a beat of silence before Emily jabbed Jessica in the ribs with her elbow. Jessica almost toppled from the crouched position next to the plastered redhead.
“Agh! What was that for!?”
“This was your idea, you tell her!” Emily shot back, feeling the heat of Sam’s glare burn into the side of her head and tried not to make direct eye contact. Jessica sighed and stood up, keeping her eyes on the ground and shuffled her feet, feeling like a scolded schoolgirl. The pigtails sure didn’t help.
“We… we were gonna trick Hannah into thinking Mike wanted to have sex with her.”
Hannah’s lip wobbled and Sam pursed her lips. Well at least she was upfront about it. You can always count on Jess to get straight to the point of things. Hannah’s eyebrows furrowed and she pouted, boldly stepping forward and slapping Mike in the chest, “What the hell, Mike?!”
Mike looked affronted and sputtered, “What!? Come the fuck on, those two forced me to do this!” He jabbed his finger at Jess and Emily, who was trying to keep Ashley upright but quickly gave up on that and spun her head, standing and immediately strutting to Jessica’s side who looked just as offended that Mike would try to pin all the blame on them. Ashley thudded to the ground and giggled, Matt quickly shooting to help her sit up again.
“Um? Excuse the fuck out of me, Michael, but I’m pretty sure you did this on your own accord,” Emily snapped, Jessica glaring and pursing her lips at him.
“Well, I mean,” Mike stumbled, trying not to lose his edge as his eyes shifted between the two girls and Sam and Hannah who were also glaring at him, “I wouldn’t have even had to be here if you two hadn’t come up with this prank in the first place.”
“Well, we wouldn’t have had to have this prank in the first fuckin’ place if somebody,” Jessica turned her gaze on Hannah who blanched, “would just stop trying to get with my best friend’s boyfriend.” It was said with a note of finality and Hannah immediately started staring at the ground, trying to hide herself behind Sam as her cheeks grew darker with embarrassment. Sam sighed through her nose and closed her eyes.
“Okay, fine. Hannah?” Sam said firmly but calmly, sounding like the mom friend they’d all come to know and love. Hannah glanced up at Sam and made a noise of acknowledgment, “I know you like Mike, but you really need to stop hitting on him when you know that he’s with Emily, okay?” Hannah kicked the ground and nodded once.
“As for the rest of you,” Sam continued, still in the same tone, “maybe instead of pranking someone to get your messages across, you could, I don’t know, talk it out?” Even though she said the rest of them, she only looked between Emily, Jessica, and Mike who all grumbled and nodded too.
“Okay. Good. We’ll talk about this tomorrow, when we’re all sober.” Sam said with a stern look, eyebrow raised.
“Uh, guys?” Matt called from the back of the room, “I think Ashley’s gonna throw up.”
“Oh, for fuck’s… again?” Emily whined, looking at Ashley as if she’d forgotten she was there. Ashley was leaning into Matt’s shoulder as he rubbed her back, she was mumbling and making attempt to stand up but Matt was firmly holding her steady so she didn’t jostle herself.
“Ashley gave you all away, did she?” Sam questioned, soundly slightly smug but still rushing to Ashley’s side dragging her up by her puffer vest and hoisting her onto her shoulder, “Come on, let’s get her downstairs and some water or something.” Matt quickly, gently, lifted Ashley onto his shoulder with Sam and winced when Ashley lurched forward and made a dry heaving noise.
“Ugh… M’be sick…”
“N-n-n-n-no, Ashley, honey, just hold it in, okay? We’re gonna get you some water,” Sam said quickly, motioning to Matt with a flick of her head that they needed to get her out of here and quickly. They both started towards the door Sam has just burst through and the rest of the room quickly followed, albeit a bit more awkwardly since they’d just had to feel the wrath of Sam’s disappointment.
“Was she drinking with Chris and Josh again?” Sam huffed, kicking another door she’d come through open.
Matt laughed dryly and nodded, “Yup. I think they smoked a bit, too.”
Sam groaned but tried not to jostle Ashley, fearing what would happen if she did, “Come on, Ash. I’ve told you before, alcohol or weed, pick one, you can’t do both at the same time.”
Ashley weakly laughed at that, head lolling back, “I can, and I did, Sammy.”
As they got closer to the kitchen, Sam heard another set of frantic footsteps getting closer and soon Beth barrelled around a corner with death in her eyes but stopped short as she saw the group coming towards her. Sam cocked an eyebrow at her girlfriend and gestured backwards to where Hannah trailed behind them.
“You saw the note I’m guessing?”
“Yeah,” Beth said, sounding a little out of breath, “Is she okay?”
“Han’s fine, it’s this one we should be worrying about,” Sam noted, glancing at Ashley who grinned drunkenly at Beth. Beth, for her part, grimaced at the blood seeping out of Ashley’s nose but quickly went to walk beside her sister, pulling her into a one-armed-hug.
Ashley stumbled along with Sam and Matt, trying to keep up with their athletic strides which was even more difficult considering they were also considerably taller than her. Though her mind was fuzzy with drugs and alcohol, she felt a slight disappointment that, from what she could tell, their prank on Hannah hadn’t come to fruition. She didn’t have anything against the girl, she was pretty close with her in fact, she just thought it would have been nice to have someone else be the butt of a joke for once. Oh, well. She had more pressing matters to attend to at the moment. Like keeping the bile trying to work its way up her throat in her stomach.
“Take her, Matt,” Sam rushed, pulling out from under Ashley’s arm and almost slamming the kitchen door open, “I’ll get her some water, make sure she doesn’t throw up.”
“Uh…” he stuttered, trying to gently pull Ashley through the threshold of the door and into the kitchen. He took note of Chris and Josh who were just fucking gone, passed out at the breakfast bar and surrounded by empty bottles and red solo cups, still half-filled with various drink concoctions they’d tried before passing out. Ashley saw them too and pointed, not too accurately, at them and laughed.
“HaHA! Bitch! Look who’s still standing!” she yelled triumphantly, pulling her arms above her head in a victory stance, unhooking herself from Matt’s steady shoulder and nearly collapsing before catching herself on the breakfast bar at the last second. Behind Matt, the other 5 of his friends entered the kitchen, taking stock of the scene before them.
Ashley stumbled along the bar, using it to steady herself as she came up to Josh’s sleeping form. She cackled and grabbed him by the shoulder, shaking them half-heartedly and whisper yelling “ayyyyy” at him. He merely groaned and curled up further on himself.
Matt didn’t really know what to do. He felt like he should probably go and steady Ashley to stop her from falling on her face… again. Emily strutted past him before he could make a move.
“Ashley,” she said, sharply, grabbing Ashley by the shoulders to face her. The sudden spinning didn’t look like it did Ashley any favours and her face immediately paled, taking on a look of concentration like she was trying really, really hard not to do something. Emily didn’t seem to notice, instead continuing to fret over the redhead. Jessica slowly edged up behind her, looking a little worried about the younger girl’s state than she did when she was chastising her for ruining her ill constructed prank.
“I’m taking you to the bathroom, okay? You look like you’re gonna-”
“HURK!”
Whatever concern Emily had for Ashley’s well-being when shooting out the window when the latter proceeded to expel whatever was left of her stomach onto Emily’s boots and leggings. There was a collective wince from everyone in the room and Jess let out a low “oooooh no” in disgust, quickly backing away from the inevitable shitstorm her best friend was about to rein down on Ashley who was slowly standing back up straight as best she could, wiping her mouth on her sleeve. Her eyes landed on what exactly she’d just puked on and looked like she was about to do it again from fear.
“O-Oh, gosh, Em… M’sorry, oh nooo…” her voice shook and so did her hands as she twitched them forward, as if she could take back what she just did.
Emily’s shoulders were still tense and no one could see the expression on her face except Ashley which, by the looks of it, was not a good one. Ashley continued to mutter apologies and Sam stood not a few feet away, glass of water in one hand, antacid already fizzing inside it. She looked just as lost as the rest of them.
A beat of silence.
“Ashley!” Emily screeched and Matt immediately sprang into action, leaping forward and dragging her away from Ashley who’d fell back into the breakfast bar again. Jessica, through her muffled laughter, came to his side and tried to calm Emily down without getting in the way of her flailing arms.
Apparently, the sudden noise was jarring enough for Josh to groggily lift his head and almost fall out of his seat with how fast he tried to turn around in it.
“Whassat?”
Chris, who was also jolted awake at the scream, wasn’t so lucky and fell into a heap on the floor after launching himself off the barstool he’d be sat on a little too quickly. He dragged himself back up, glasses crooked on his flushed face and stumbled around to where Ashley stood, still groggily trying to get away from the loud noises.
“What’s she done?” His words slurred together but sounded defensive as Chris clumsily patted Ashley on the arm, squinting at Emily who had shrugged off Matt was now cringing down at her shoes.
“She fucking threw up all over me!”
“She didn’t mean to!” Josh jumped in, also slurring his words, “She’s got a weak tummy.” As if to prove his point he jabbed Ashley in the stomach who lurched over and dry heaved again, weakly.
“Hey! Bro, not cool, man…” Chris frowned at Josh who at least looked sorry and rubbed Ashley’s back as an apology.
Meanwhile, off to the side, Sam considered chugging what was left of the cocktails Josh, Chris, and Ashley had made just so she wouldn’t have to be the responsible one in this situation, yet again. She placed the glass of antacid on the breakfast bar and sighed, dragging her hands down her face. She could hear Mike outwardly guffawing at the whole thing, seemingly forgetting the shitty prank he’d just been in on. She felt a hand on her shoulder and uncovered her eyes to find Beth giving her a look, Hannah standing close behind her; they’d made their way over to her through the commotion.
Emily made a rude hand gesture and Jess tapped her shoulder, giggling, “Come on, vomit legs, let’s get you cleaned up.”
“Fucking gross, I can feel it on my legs,” Emily sounded like she was about to cry and honestly, who could blame her.
Sam didn’t know when she came into the possession of this many children; this many gross, drunk, lovable children, but she had them now and they had her and honestly, they’d probably be dead by now if she didn’t watch over them. Probably.
Ashley had her arms swung over Josh and Chris’ shoulder, all three of them wheezing with laughter over something no one else had heard of a reference no one else would get.
Somewhere outside, a stranger with a flamethrower ran through the woods chasing his worst foe.
All was well.
