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Sometimes, at night, he laid and thinks about what she'd look like now.
Time moved different on Erid. It was slower, only marked by the enthusiastic classes with his students. He was happy here.
But it wasn't the same. Nothing was.
He missed home. Just a bit. Just enough that it was a problem.
He missed the warm breeze that escorted spring in, how it disturbed the cool air of winter. He missed the sweet frappes of his local coffee shop, how the sugar made him jittery.
He missed the imperfections of life on Earth.
Everything here was steady. His environment never changed. His food. The oxygen level.
Consistent.
Sometimes, he hated consistency. There was nothing fun about it, about being...confined to his environment on Erid.
He felt bad for missing it. But he did.
But he missed being challenged.
Challenges.
Her.
She had been his biggest challenge. A puzzle to solve. Much like the astrophage that he had been tasked with solving. Look where that had gotten him.
Biology was predominantly predictable.
Prey. Predators. Photosynthesis. Phagocytosis. Phosphorylation.
Predictable.
Steady.
Consistent.
Like her.
He missed her. She had been the quiet, dominant hand that guided him, encouraged him...forced him.
He wasn't happy with her. Not at all.
But he couldn't help but sit and think about her. Their odd interactions. The What-Ifs. He was never able to read her well. But she was consistent.
He knew she probably hadn't changed her coffee order (Iced espresso. Faster to drink). She would still wake up at 5:15 AM. The only thing that would have changed would be her. He wondered where her greys would appear, collected at her temples or evenly distributed. He wondered if she would ever had laugh lines that would crinkle the corner of her eyes.
Did she deserve those laugh lines?
Debatable.
Time was a thief, he decided. It would take him 17 light years to get home from Erid.
Time had stolen his possibilities from him.
Like she had.