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tipsyGnostalgic [TG] began pestering timaeusTestified [TT]
TG: sooooooo
TG: did u do it
TG: blink blink blinkk
TG: wink wonk blink blonk
TT: Did I complete my final exams and projects?
TT: Yes. With ease. Though my art final took a bit of streamlining to ensure it was finished by the deadline.
TT: Thanks for asking.
TG: ohhgmy goahwd ur so annoying
TG: did u exxxecute THA PLAN
TT: I'm not sure what you're referencing here, Rox. Could you elaborate?
TG: ok so dats a big fat freakin no then
TG: SIIIGNNNNNNNN
TT: Rox.
TG: dipsapointed but naht surprised
TG: errybody give it up for dirk strider spepnding ANOTHER winter break ALONE
TT: Rox.
TG: airhornns airhorns airhonrs
TT: Roxy. Look.
TG: oh NOW he knows whay the fuck im talkign about
TG: here come thw patented strider excuses
TT: Just listen, okay?
TG: humph
TT: I reassessed the variables.
TG: dis guy reassessed the variables
TT: And it wasn't good. The optics were all off.
TT: I mean, confessing your feelings on the last day before break? Cliched. Inept. Redolent with desperation.
TT: He doesn't even spend his breaks in town. His family heads off on their extravagant world travels, and whatever.
TT: It just wasn't going to work.
TG: oh
TG: my gawd
TG: ur hopeless
TT: Evidently.
TG: and dat rite there
TG: ladiez and gentlenem
TG: is how one jake englush goes unromanced by one dirk strider for YET ANOTHER SEMESTER
TG: or really jus the freakin 'ter
TG: cause we kno ur ass is NAWHT putting the seme in semester
TG: thoug im sure u want a seme to put soemthgin in UR ass ...
TG: winkity WONK ;)
TT: Are you finished?
TG: NO!
TG: dirk joaks aside i jus want u to be happy
TG: and since askin out dat big green goofball is whatll evidentily do the trick
TG: i freakin WANT U 2 DO THAT!!!
TT: I appreciate that, Rox.
TT: I really do. You put up with a lot from me.
TG: yea cuase i love you dorkus
TG: wiat
TG: omgz
TG: imboutta make an awesoem freaking point are u LISTENING
TT: I'm all ears.
TG: okaysies
TG: litsen up
TG: remebmer when i asked u out in middle school?
TT: Uh.
TT: How many drinks have you had today, Rox?
TG: thatse NOT RELEVEANT RIGHT NOW!!!
TG: im not hitting on u idoit i got ovah that forevers ago
TG: jus get outta ur big head for one freakin second and play alaong
TG: u love playing along
TG: dirkdo u wanna play a game well thenb PLAY MY GAME
TT: Okay, okay.
TT: Consider me chained to a pipe in a grimy bathroom.
TT: Go ahead, Jigsawlonde.
TG: hehe ur so silly
TG: ok once again riddle me dis
TG: rememebr when i asked u out
TT: Yes.
TG: and whatd u do
TT: I rejected you.
TG: annnd then what hapepned?
TT: Uh.
TT: I felt bad about it?
TG: no u silly goopse im talkin in thw long termz
TG: we became BESTIES!!!!!1
TT: What’s the point you’re trying to make here?
TT: That if Jake rejects me, no worries, I can just languish in perpetuity as his closest friend?
TG: jus listen 2 me dirky my gawd
TG: i am SAYIGN that if he says no, its not the end of the whole freakin world!!
TG: just shoot ur shot!
TT: I think he’s the one who’s more adept at shooting, actually.
TG: oh my god
TG: DIRK
TT: Roxy.
TG: ask!!! him!!! out!!!
TG: whats the worst that could hapen!!!
TT: Hapen.
TG: shush
TG: dont ignore my quetsion!
TT: All the worst things could happen, Roxy. All of them.
TT: I’ve ran the numbers on virtually every scenario that could arise from my confession, and the vast majority end in nothing but a bruised ego and a broken heart.
TT: I can’t risk it, Rox.
TT: Until I am convinced that this hypothetical schema results in my desired outcome, hypothetical it will remain.
TT: And that’s that.
TG: jeeses freakin christ
TG: for such a self proclaimed "coolguy dudebro manly mans man" u rly are a drama queen
TG: ur like
TG: the PRINCE of drama
TG: heyy doesnt jake do drama? maeby u could join that!
TT: The gay guy with the unrequited crush joining the drama club?
TT: I'm not too keen on resorting to cliches and caricatures quite so soon.
TT: I have something called pride, you know.
TG: oh dirky
TG: trutst me
TG: i know
TT: Yeah, yeah.
TG: lolll ur such a dork
TG: heyawanna come hang
TG: rosie an her girl jus got a metric fucktun of new yarn and fabricks and stuff for tha winter months and i know ur freaky ass wuold go cray for all these textiles
TG: maybby make a cozy for ur smuppepts
TG: keep thos probusscucies nice an toasty
TT: Dude. Yes.
TT: Hell fuckin' yes.
TT: Though, for the record, I don't need any kind of incentive to spend time with you.
TT: You're my best friend.
TT: Not even rejection-turned-rapport with Jake would change that.
TG: AW
TG: aawwwww
TG: aw aw aww
TG: and who evr said u dont kno how 2 make em swoon
TG: theres hope for u yet, strider
TT: One must imagine.
TT: I'll see you soon.
TG: cyaaa luverboy
TG: <333
tipsyGnostalgic [TG] ceased pestering timaeusTestified [TT]