Chapter Text
Jagged scars litter his skin like messy doodles on the corner of a paper. They're old and faded and shouldn't even exist, but the universe is funny that way. Nothing and everything happened and all he has left are the scars on his body that will forever hold the memories of all of the fights he lost from Scrap-N-Tap.
His eye doesn't look beaten anymore, but his vision isn't how it used to be. He can't be bothered by wearing glasses because what kind of ninja wears glasses?
I do.
The lightning ninja huffs as he puts on the thick black rectangular glasses. Maybe his left eye was already bad from all of the close up lightning strikes and not at all from whatever bullshit he faced on Misfortunes Keep. Or maybe this is just another desperate attempt at hoping that at least one of his issues isn't from that horrid ship.
He has this bad habit of tracing everything back to that ship. Everything bad leads back to that teapot, but now that everything was stripped from history, what can he blame now?
Breakfast is loud and chaotic as usual. There's an odd comfort that relaxes Jay when everyone is loud and moving. Overstimulating environments never bothered him. He spent many quiet mornings in the junkyard growing up. He had no siblings and his parents were old so they never really did much except work.
It’s weird having money now. Growing up, he was dirt poor and he carried this weird feeling of shame with him. Sometimes it creeped up on him like a shadow when he wasn't expecting it. It felt like he was forced to feel guilt– he’s forced to feel burdened by the little wealth he had.
Knowing that he could’ve had everything he ever wanted but his parents gave him up left him conflicted. He thought about reaching out but if his real father didn't want him then, then why would he want him now.
He’s an adult now. In this timeline, Cliff Gordon never died and now Jay can’t even watch his favorite movies without being full of this envious rage that slowly turned into yearning and sadness. Cole and Kai couldn't comprehend the sudden change of Jay’s hatred for the Fritz Donnegan movies.
When Nya and Jay explained what really happened, it finally clicked… for the most part. Jay didn't dare tell them that his dad was the famous Cliff Gordon. That’s one secret he must keep for himself. Ed and Edna are his parents and that’s how he likes it.
Things are better now, Jay thinks. He doesn't have to hide the scars and pretend that nothing happened. Nya was the only one who really understands but they realized quickly that they couldn't keep running to each other when things got bad. Jay held back a lot because as he got older he realized how shitty Nya’s situation was. When Kai found out, they had to put out a fire– which was valid.
Time heals all wounds and Jay was starting to believe that was true.
Bedhead and crooked glasses were a staple to Jay’s fashion on mornings where there wasn't training. He wasn't a coffee drinker and the fridge was always stocked up with energy drinks due to the very concerning caffeine addiction that the ninja developed over the years. First, it was cases of Code Red Mountain Dew and Nya’s Dr Pepper addiction. Wu put an end to that immediately. Water and tea was the only thing they got unless it was a special occasion or an off day– which was rare. Sensei was a father figure in a way to Jay. Ed couldn't look after him and at least Wu showed care and interest in him.
Kai tossed him his usual flavor of Alani. His reflexes were sharp despite the lingering fatigue from the nonstop training. Today was the only day that he could sleep in but he couldn't even if he tried. He grabbed four pieces of bread to toast. Lloyd was pouring a large bowl of cereal while Kai was still digging in the fridge for the bacon. Cole swiftly squeezed past Jay so he could place his cold drink on Kai’s bare back.
“Go put on a shirt,” Cole half joked as Kai yelped. “Show some decency for FSM sake.”
Lloyd stifled a smile while Kai rolled his eyes. The fire ninja straightened up and took a deep breath. “Yeah yeah,” he grumbled as he placed the bacon down on the sizzling pan. Kai was never a morning person and Cole took advantage of that.
Once Jay’s bread popped out of the toaster, he buttered two of them and put strawberry jelly on the other two for Nya. She always wakes up later than the rest. He’s surprisingly quiet in the mornings as he works on making Nya’s breakfast. He always liked plain buttered toast but he knew Nya loved fruit with hers and some bacon (that he definitely was not going to steal from Kai). Jay grabbed the least burnt looking one and placed it on his plate while Kai was rummaging in the fridge again.
He hears footsteps coming from behind him and then a gentle peck on his cheek. He can always predict what comes next. Nya gives him a tired smile and takes her plate from him and goes to sit down, leaving an empty chair next to her for him. He sits down with his energy drink and slices of toast and soon everyone is now at the table, even Zane.
Nya looks at his bare plate and sighs. Not a single fruit or vegetable on his plate, but neither does anyone else but her and Cole. She was about to say something about scurvy but that might bring up some bad memories, so she bites her tongue. Plus, she knows better than to comment on someone's plate. She used to drink Dr Pepper from breakfast with a granola bar so she can't say much.
Jay takes his glasses off to rub his eyes and every worry feels small to Nya. It’s too early to be worried about the mundane things in life like making sure her boyfriend was getting enough nutrients. She doesn't need to worry all the time. Everyone she loves is safe and sound right now.
A lazy afternoon and late night move marathon was how the rest of their day went. The calm and peacefulness never truly feels like a day off when they know something bad is always lingering around the corner, but for now they all sit on the couch with a dozen blankets and popcorn watching a movie from their childhood.
It’s late and the end credits illuminate the living room. Everyone's asleep but Jay. The volume is turned down so there's just a whisper of background music. He had Cole’s arm on him and Lloyd’s foot digging into his side. He delicately shifts to not wake the sleeping boys so he can go to his room.
When he was younger, his mom used to sing to him to sleep. He’s not a child anymore, but he misses it on the night where he's plagued with insomnia and loud thoughts.
His life is so fast paced now, he struggles to slow down. Even his heart beat is abnormally fast. Nothing about him is ever calm but the others don't seem to mind that much– which is nice.
He breathes in and out at a pace that's too slow for him but he knows he has to do this just to calm his nervous system.
In
Out
In
Out
In
And Out
In
…
~
It’s cold and dark in his room when he wakes up. Torrential downpour shakes the monastery and everything feels bad. He rolls over to check the time. He immediately rolls over and tosses his phone back on his night stand. The lightning outside aggravates his bones and muscles. He hates this time of the year when the weather makes his body ache. He used to love watching storms when he was younger. He wasn't the type to be afraid of thunder but now it causes him to hide like a little kid. The only time it doesn't make his chest tight and his heart race is when there's someone with him. When did being alone scare him so much?
~
He doesn't remember closing his eyes and drifting off again until there's a sudden bang at his door. Light blinds him for a moment and he is met by Kai who is shouting at him to get dressed and hurry outside.
Jay kicks off the blanket like it's fighting him before he runs to his closet to put on his gi. His socks don't match and he doesn't have his glasses on. His untamed hair got in the way of his eyes and he quickly pushed everything back with a bandana. The windows in the kitchen were left open, causing the curtains to blow in every direction. Papers scatter the floor.
The door handle immediately flies out of his hands as the wind swings them open with a harsh slam. Dust and dirt flies at his face, which momentarily blinds him. The only thing he hears is the whistling of the wind, which sounds like a plane is taking off right next to him. His head erratically twists and turns trying to find the others.
He blindly walks into the storm with no sense of direction. The farther he traverses, the more lost he becomes. He was always taught to never leave shelter when there's a blizzard, but this isn't snow. He’s almost positive he's in the middle of a tornado or a very very intense dust storm.
He’s never done good under pressure. Every small inconvenience feels like the end of the world to him and any hope of finding his teams is diminishing by the second. Crescent moon imprints the palm of his hands as he spins around trying to find where the hell he is. The monastery training grounds were huge but there was at least a wall to follow, but Jay couldn't find a wall or a pole. It was like the wind destroyed it.
A piercing white noise suddenly wailed in his ear. Falling to his knees, he curses before crying out for his friends. The pain spreads throughout his body like rushing water. He becomes hyperaware of every spark, every prick, and every cut on his skin.
Where is everyone?
He takes forceful gasps of air but immediately chokes on the debris. His eyes begin to water from the panic of lack of oxygen. He desperately pulls down his bandana over his mouth and nose to block out the blowing dust. His brown hair immediately flies into his eyes but it's not like he could see clearly before.
The rumble below him was the clearest thing Jay could feel amidst the chaos of it all. He had nothing to hold onto. Nothing to scream out to. Nothing to ground him. Nothing to save him.
He couldn't comprehend his surroundings as he fell, but one thing he knew for sure was that he was alone. He figures he’d hear the others screaming if he wasn't entirely alone. Maybe they were but were being drowned out by his own yell.
Falling alone with the echoes of his own cries, he wishes he stayed inside. Maybe he would've been called a coward, but at least he wouldn't be meeting his maker just for stepping outside blindly into a storm.
He prays to FSM that his friends are okay. Selfishly, he hopes they're already trying to save him and pull him out of this situation– whatever this ‘situation’ is.