Chapter Text
It has been a few days since the team - and Azula - arrived at the western air temple, they have only started to settle into their new shelter. The passing days have been rough on everyone- especially Aang. Everyone was adjusting to their new member, to Azula. Everything was in a strange tense, nothing light or heavy just, still.
Azula had joined them after she had confronted her father, the group of teens had been reluctant but weren’t willing to let her simply die out in a bunker. She hadn’t planned to escape with the avatar’s team of teens, she had wanted to break out Iroh along with her escape. Thinking back now, it was foolish in a way, uncle was a general- still was deep down- he could handle a prison break without her help flawlessly.
After all, her uncle wasn’t named ‘the Dragon of the West’ for nothing.
Though she still worries about the old man, she’s quite certain he had made an escape too when the solar eclipse was at its fullest. After all she was no blind fool like her brother, she knew what uncle was up to, she saw through the man's silence- even if it hurts. Who could blame him though? She had traded her uncle’s loyalty and love for cold honor she never truly lost- honor she had been too blinded to see.
And now here she was, gathered around a campfire with the rest of team avatar around her- whether this was the highest or lowest point of her desperation, she wasn’t certain herself.
“So..Azula, we’ve discussed some things, and one thing has become clear-” Azula stiffened slightly as Sokka continued “-We need a way to distract your brother, or at least a way to keep him busy.” The former princess blinked at the boy, Azula’s eyes squinted as she looked at all of them, uncertain if she had heard that properly “You’re asking for scraps here Sokka, not even I know if he knows what happiness is, much less distractions” The water tribe boy groans
“Come on! There has to be something.” Azula sighs as the water tribe girl patted her brother's shoulder “I’m afraid there isn’t any with this Zuko at least. After he started training, our father shredded any distractions he had, ‘distractions showed weakness’ he repeated it like a mantra. But there was a time…if you asked me back when I was 5 what could be a distraction for Zuko, I would’ve told you to hand him bread and point him to the nearest pond with turtleducks” Katara and Aang shared a look once she’s done speaking
“Turtleducks?” toph butts in “Never thought someone so violent used to feed turtleducks as a hobby” Aang nodded along with the others as another conversation started up around her, she wanted to add that Zuko hadn’t always been so violent, that his violence was taught, but even she couldn’t convince herself of that fact. Zuko was violent, there was nothing left of the brother she used to look up to, only a shell filled with violent urges and hatred so strong it’s infectious.
A part of her still admired him, a part of her that still wanted to believe that Zuko wasn’t violent or dangerous, but instead just hurt by the years he’s been abandoned.
Azula doesn’t believe it, but a part of her does, a part of her that refuses to give up her brother, or the gentle kindled flames he used to light when the nights got dark enough for her to fit herself beside him in his bed without notifying palace staff.
But a part of her also despised him, a part of her that knew she was supposed to be the prodigy, the loyal daughter. Her fire had been bright for years after her birth, yet one day it started to fade, to snuff, then she couldn’t firebend at all. So she fell behind, while Zuko’s flame grew stronger with passing days, the flames he wielded turning a shade of sapphire blue. It should have been hers.
Her brother’s fire thrived and flourished as if spring had come for its flowers.
And so she was left with a hollow ache of where a thriving flame should be.
She was discarded the same day her flame died, she had to relearn everything. Every technique, every stance, everything. She had lost her fire, and her honor. The scarred face she holds displays evidence of her incompetence as her father once reminded her. Azula touched her scarred cheek, the scar was healed but it was still painful, not in a physical way, but rather in a more spiritual way.
She had done it to herself in an attempt to prove her worth as his child, yet it ended in failure and her pained screams.
She paid a price for trying to please a man that’s impossible to please, and the one to blame for that incident- for her scar, was Ozai alone.
“-We should head to sleep now, it’s getting late and frankly? I’m not up to hearing cat owls tonight.” Azula looks up to the group, the end of their conversation clear with Sokka’s suggestion. Katara was the first to stand up and stretch her arms “Well, I think Sokka is right for once-” Hey! Katara shoots him a playful smile as she continued “-We should head to sleep so we can start Aang on his firebending training early in the morning” Aang groans, throwing his head back, Sokka snickers as he stands up beside Katara
Cracking his knuckles before he lets out a laugh “C’mon it won’t be too bad, how early does he even have to wake up?” asked the boy turning to the firebender, the girl stares him dead in the eyes “Dawn.” she deadpans as her gaze moves to Aang who holds an expression of horror “Dawn?! But then I wouldn’t get enough sleep!” Aang protested, Azula shrugs, “Well, better get sleeping then.” Aang’s jaw drops slightly further as he grumbles under his breath, his feet dragging against the ground
Sokka and Toph follows behind him not long after while Katara stayed behind, her expression one of amusement “You should also head to bed” Azula nods “I’ll stay out here a little longer” Katara eyes her with suspicion before she turns on her heels to follow the others
Azula sighs as her footsteps grow distant and quiet, she didn’t know what she was doing, especially not about teaching the avatar firebending. What was she thinking when she had agreed to it? Because it was her destiny a voice in her head whispered, Azula shifts on her feet
The night was cold and dark, so alike of the nights she would climb into big brother’s bed and have him comfort her through the darkness of the night. She grieved that boy, truly she did, because what became of him wasn’t that same gentle boy but instead a raging fire that couldn’t be controlled.
Sometimes she wonders if things could've been different, she doubts the possibility- maybe there was a world where Zuko would be sitting here, praying to Ag ni instead of her. If such a world existed, she prays to Ag ni such a world exists, even if it's one far away.
Let there be a world where her brother had enough good left in him.
__________
The blade held in his hand, his breathing ragged, sweat dripped as he heaved the air in his lungs. The blade pressed against his own throat, he presses the blade down as beads blood forms at the cut of his blade
The prince stares at his reflection, his eyes devoid of emotions and hollow of life. He pulls away the knife and sheathes it, his hand moves with precision as the blade was placed back in a drawer in his vanity. The boy wipes away the beads of blood, his finger stained red with his own
A smile spreads on the boy's face at the sight, his finger stained red and his throat beading with more blood. The beads pooled with the crimson liquid till in starts to run, the sight of it giving the prince hope
He can still feel
The prince relishing at the sight, at the feeling that bubbles, at the pain. He picks up a cloth he'd grabbed earlier, the cloth wet from the ice water he had soaked it in, the prince squeezed the cloth of excess water before dragging the wash cloth against the lines of blood and pressing it onto the cut he made, the water itched at the cut- he presses it down harder.
His breathing evened out as the cut stopped bleeding and the cloth grows warm in his hand, the young prince’s hair disheveled and his robe a tangled mess. The young prince runs his hand through his hair, the loose strands standing down as his hand trails past his shoulders before he lets go of his breath. Zuko traces his finger along the cut he had made , his eyes lingers on the image of himself in the mirror
Zuko chuckles, his left hand running down his face, the cloth discarded into its previous bowl. A scowl playing on the boy’s face, Ozai thought he won, but he miscalculated. His father hadn’t won anything, he simply thought he did.
Ozai was cold, he was ruthless, dangerous, manipulative and would go to any length for control and what he wanted.
But he was also blind. Ozai miscalculated, he was mistaken and that will truly cost his father his life- whether that be by his or the avatar’s hands, would be up to destiny.
Because he had come so close to breaking him, and yet he hadn’t broken him, not fully, never fully. He broke him enough for unquestioned obedience but never enough to fully break him, and that’s where his father miscalculated, he asked for obedience but never for his loyalty. He asked for unquestioned obedience of the prince, never of Zuko.
Not in the way everyone in his life once asked. Not in the way uncle and Lu Ten had greeted him with warmth and tea, or the way Azula would look at him with curiosity and would let him hold her when the nights grew dark, or in the way his mother would spend hours sitting with him near the pond feeding turtleducks, or in the way Ty Lee and Mai had always included him despite being Azula’s friends.
Ozai had taken many things from him, broken him only to build him up into ‘The Loyal fire Prince’ , taken everything he’d done and thrown it in his face any time he pleases. The fool wasn’t Zuko, it’s never been Zuko, but instead it's his foolish father who had thought he'd discarded all attachment to the people who once showed him what kindness was.
That had been where the Firelord misstepped, he miscalculated the scale and how impressionable young children are or how much a little kindness can go.
Every warning, “Never become your father Zuko, I’m so sorry” his mother once cried while she hugged him tight before the night she left. “My brother is a cruel man, nephew. He does not stand down without a fight, even if it’s against his own.” Uncle had told him before he glanced over to Azula’s new scar. “Zuzu..I don’t know what to do! My fire it’s dying..Father will surely punish me!” Azula had sobbed as he held her. Each warning, each trusting eyes, everything counted for something.
Sure he’s sometimes out of it enough to not realize what he’s even doing, but that doesn’t mean he isn’t still there sometimes- though not regularly in the recent years of Azula’s banishment, he’s there every month at least once, more if he’s given missions outside of the fire nation or the palace. Most recently was his clash with the Avatar, he was in and out of it then.
Now he stands before himself, cut throat and sore limbs.
He was back, and he has to deal with it. Because Ozai hadn’t broken him, and that will be his mistake.
__________
Azula tossed and turned, shifting around in an attempt to fall asleep, she let out a groan, sitting up in her bed. The world around her buzzing with chirps of owl cats and the noise of fire crickets, the girl sits up, moonshining down upon the sleeping world. She needed needed fresh air, Azula walks out her room as she stalks up the stair, the small flame in her hand flickering with passing winds and against the shadow of moonlight
She reaches the open area of their camp, the bonfire now ash and snuffed, she looks around at her surroundings. The dark enveloping everything around her, the dim light in her hand doing little to light her sight.
Her eyes moved over to Appa and the edge of the temple, then she paused, someone else was sitting at the edge.
Azula swallowed, her feet moving before her mind, the flame she held flickering -flinching- at the figure before it snuffs out. Azula turns to her hand, her face scrunching up as she attempts to summon another flame to no avail, Azula groans before another light engulfs her surroundings
The princess blinks, her head turns to the figure who held a flame in his hand, the boy’s hair short while his posture mirrored one she was taught years before. She stares, then she freezes.
The boy had shorter hair then she last saw him -had he cut his hair?- and an unfamiliar scar that looked aged and healed -When had he gotten that?- his eyes filled with life she hadn’t seen since before their Father had started to train him, Azula stared at Zuko, and Zuko stared back
Azula steps back, eyes widening at the sight of him “What are you doing here?!” she shouted, her hand hovered at the handle of her sword. The boy in front of her simply blinks before turning his attention to the ravine below them, Azula swallows back the growing panic as the darkness engulfed them again
Why is he here? And why did he- oh
This was a dream, or hallucination, she supposes? It isn’t often she gets one of these hallucinations anymore. It's been half a year since her last one, and she’s gotten pretty good at differentiating what was real and what wasn’t.
She’s not sure how she didn’t realize it instantly, after all Zuko looked the exact same as the last time she had a hallucination of him.
Azula lowers herself beside ‘him’ as the moonlight engulfs her, the stars bright and leaving the sky beautiful tonight. “It's been a while ‘brother’ “ Azula says, ‘zuko’ spares her a glance before nodding- Right, he never spoke in these.”It’s been rough lately, you know? With our relationship and the fire nation and our father” ‘zuko’ nods in response, azula shrugs
‘Zuko’ was different from Zuko, ‘Zuko’ listened when she spoke- perhaps that’s because he himself cannot, so instead he listens to her. “I miss you sometimes” She blurts out, ‘zuko’ raises his eyebrow at the statement “not you-” she says pointing at ‘him’ “-I meant Zuko, the real Zuko who I grew up with and looked up to” Azula stares at ‘him’ as her heart ached, at the memories , at the memories her zuko had probably burnt till’ he forgot.
“You know, sometimes I wonder what things would be like if it had been…different” Azula stares up, the star in the sky dancing as the moon shines bright as ever, the cold breeze of the night blankets her with comfort “I think if things were different, it wouldn’t be so different from what’s already happened” Azula nods, her eyes tracing the shape of the stars
“But what’s done is done, you can only look towards the future now there’s no room for regret” Azula glances at ‘Zuko’ , a small smile playing on his lips. He never spoke before this, what changed? “You’re talking” Azula points out, ‘zuko tilts his head to the side “You never talked before, what changed?”
‘Zuko’ shrugs, Azula lets out a sigh “And back to no talking, what are you uncle? Throwing proverbs then shutting up completely?” ‘Zuko’ snorted at that, Azula shakes her head
Maybe she was actually going crazy again, it didn’t seem so out of character for her
“I doubt it, uncle loves his proverbs as much as he likes his tea, even I can’t understand his proverbs” Azula blinks at her hallucination, was her hallucination mocking her? “Are you mocking me?” ‘Zuko’ scrunches his face “No?” Azula groans, her hand running through her hair “Sure seems like it” The boy sputters at the accusation “Wha- well I’m not!” Azula chuckles “Ag ni, even your temper is like him”
‘Zuko’ stares at her before he shrugs “And I’m not ‘him’?” Azula shakes her head “You’re my hallucination, of course you’re not him” Azula leans back, her arms supporting her “You’re nothing like him anyways, too calm, and weak as father would say. He’s never shown emotions other than “deranged” after his training with father” ‘Zuko’ paused, his eyes filled with something unfamiliar, before he scoffed
“What?” She asked, ‘Zuko’ shakes his head “Nothing” Azula continues to stare, because she doesn’t know what he’s thinking, she looks him over and leans forward towards ‘Zuko’ “What are you doing?” her hallucination asked “How are you doing that?” ‘Zuko’ leans back, moving slightly to the side “Doing what?” he hissed “That! How are you-?! You’re MY hallucination-” she points a finger at her hallucination "But you- you feel…real! You're not supposed to be real or even feel real!”
Her hallucination moved away from her, backing up she stalked towards him, Azula ‘tsk-ed’ her hand moving as her fingers poked him square in his chest, Azula recoils at the contact of fabric, that shouldn’t be possible.
She stares at her head as her attention slowly turns to the creature in front of her “What are you?” The creature stares at her, her stomach churns with nausea at the sight of the creature that’s stolen her brother’s face and twisted it. “What are you?!” she repeats, sword unsheathed in her hand, the blade reflecting the moon
The creature stares at her blankly for a moment before he opens his mouth and closes it again, the silence stretches between them as it turns awkward rather than tense “A..universal spirit displacement?” Azula raises an eyebrow before the creature sighed “It’s a long story..” Azula huffed “I got time” she spits, the creature blinks and nods hesitantly “So, it started with an Agni Kai for the throne…”
__________
The prince sits in the entrance of the court yard, the warm wind blowing against his hair and robe. The moon hung above him danced among the stars, free from the shackles of humanity as the moon spirit danced with their lover, and among the love and admiration of water bender and the stars.
Both hands laid in his lap and his eyes upwards to the moon, the prince sighs a heavy breath “ Zula, must I call the guards? After all, you shouldn’t be at the palace.” spoke the prince, his head low yet does not bother himself to spare his sister a glance.
The strained laugh of the girl was what made him glance over his shoulder, because that wasn’t how his sister laughed. “You’re so funny Zuzu, cuz last I checked it was you who shouldn’t be here.” the girl says through gritted teeth, the prince blinks before gesturing to the spot beside him for her to sit down. She does not sit, but instead lean against the wall of the entrance
The prince simply nods, “What are you doing here Azula?” The girl laughed, a grin spread on her face “Oh Zuzu, you know why I’m here. But why are you here? After all you’re a traitor to the nation now” The prince lifts his head to glance towards his guest “What nonsense are you speaking of? If anyone is a traitor to the nation it would be you.” His eyes running over his guest, her arms crossed and her face clean of that wretched scar.
“I speak of the truth, you decided to commit treason on your own accord and that’s a crime. If I were anyone else I would’ve already thrown you in prison” Treason? Zuko stares at the one that bares his sister’s face, their eyes met for a moment before her iris widens slightly before they return to normal “You're not Zuzu.” She stated “And you’re not Zula”
Their eyes never moving from each other as the air begins to grow tense, the warmth of their hands growing as the imposter leaps into the courtyard “There is only one punishment fit for someone impersonating a figure of the royal family. Former or not.” Zuko grinned as he slowly stands up with his arms at his side “I cannot agree more ‘sister’ “ he spits at the imposter
He blasts a fire at the girl, moving to dodge as he shoots another her way. The girl blocks the second one with her own fire, the same sapphire blue flame dancing with the imposter as they fought. The tree caught in a cross fire as the imposter hid behind it and spitting fire from one of the higher branches of the tree, Zuko gritted his teeth as one of her flames lightly grazed his robes
The impersonator fights with a grin wide on her face, he sends rapid fire balls at her, she dodges too late at the last one, knocking it off her feet as she stumbles and ruins the grass under her feet. She pants as their eyes met, their flames burning for a fight and refusing to lose
Zuko charges forward as the flame inside calls for him, the girl grins as she steps into a another fighting stance, her hand lighting up in flames as she surges forward at him
Their fire burns, and so will the imposter.
_____
The fire burns between them as stares at her ‘brother’, he speaks of another world where things were different, a world where she never lost her flame and bloomed into what her brother has become. The boy spoke of his banishment and how he arrived in her world. ‘Universal displacement’ he said, though she’s not sure what that truly meant
He spoke of how it felt to die, of the spirits that helped him -should have helped him- return to his world and how the spirits spoke of a second chance. Yet now he sat beside her with a flame lit in his hand while she didn't fully believe him, even when he knew details of her time in banishment he shouldn’t be aware of.
Because it shouldn’t be possible, even if different universes exist, someone from a different universe shouldn’t just show up out of thin air.
“...and then I woke up here” he finished, his hand fidgeting with the bandage around his hand “Right, and why would I believe You?” ‘Zuko’ shrugs at her question, as he stands up, the flame in his hand snuffed out as dawn peaked through the horizon "Believe what you want, cuz that’s not my problem” Her eyes squares in on him as he slowly creeps to the edge “What are- HEY!” She shouts as the boy jumped off the edge of the temple
Azula surges forward, her body on the floor as she stares down at the ravine below as a rope was thrown above her head, Azula watches as ‘Zuko’ climbs up the rope and over the edge. She stares mouth agape- unsure if anything that had just happened was real or a very real hallucination.
Azula sighs as she pulls herself up and groans,she turns around to head back to her room before she pauses. She stares at the brown haired boy “Azula! Uhm, hey- I didn’t I thought- uhm…I didn’t expect you awake” Azula nods as she stalks past him
Sokka stares as she walks away and shrugs as dawn rises for a new day.