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They were just hanging out together, just like they always did after school. Catra was sitting propped up on her bed, scrolling through her phone as she ranted about Miss Weaver. Adora on the other hand had made herself comfortable on the beanbag next to the bed, trying to focus on her homework. Though a certain someone was making it quite difficult for her to do so.
"-and I don't get it, my grades are good and I focus during class. So why the fuck does she have it out for me?!" With a groan she let her phone fall on the bed, burying her face into her pillow.
Adora sighed, getting the feeling that she wouldn't be able to finish her work with her friend acting like this. "I mean, you are kind of disrespectful."
That earned her another groan. "Name one time." Catra challenged her.
"Okay," Adora said with a smirk, putting away her books for now. "How about that one time you fell asleep during class, and when she woke you up you said that 'if she didn't want you sleeping during class, she should find a way to make it actually interesting'?"
"Still true."
"Still disrespectful."
"Still a nerd."
"Still a brat."
Catra huffed, but cracked a small smile at her nonetheless. She picked her phone back up and continued scrolling on whatever app she was using before. For a brief moment Adora was able to focus again, having finished two questions before Catra distracted her again.
"Oh my fucking god, no way!" She stared at her phone as if she'd seen a ghost, before looking over to Adora with a wide grin. "You owe me 5 bucks."
She raised an eyebrow at her. "I do?"
The phone flipped around towards Adora, showing her a picture of Perfuma and Scorpia in a side hug with the caption 'First Pride as a couple'. "Ugh fuck, I really thought it was going to take them a little longer." Reluctantly she grabbed her wallet out of her bag and searched for a 5 dollar bill, handing it over with a small glare.
"Sucks to suck." The bill was snatched out of her hands, Catra's gaze still firmly planted on hers. Catra could be so frustrating from time to time. And that grin, that stupid fucking grin. She could feel her cheeks heat up with annoyance.
The beanbag was starting to get uncomfortable, resulting in her abandoning her books completely and joining Catra on the bed. For a moment they just sat there in silence, Adora pretending to watch something on her phone as her eyes kept flickering over to Catra.
For a moment she let herself wonder what it would feel like to rake her fingers through Catra's long curly hair, let herself wonder how many freckles Catra had and if she would ever let Adora count them, wonder how Catra's hands would feel on her skin-
"Do you ever wonder what it's like?" Catra asked suddenly, only then did Adora realize Catra had caught her staring.
Her mind was still in a bit of a daze as she answered. "What what's like?"
"Kissing a girl."
It made her brain short circuit and a blush rise in her cheeks. She desperately tried to regain composure, but it seemed to be to no avail. "Weren't you a lesbian?" Her voice shook slightly as she spoke, she just hoped that Catra wouldn't notice.
To her surprise Catra's cheeks also started to gain a pink tint. "I mean, yes! But I've never actually kissed a girl, I just think they're awesome and amazing and are the prettiest beings on the planet. Plus boys stink, while girls smell like flowers and-"
"Cat," She tried to catch her friend's attention as she rambled. "I haven't kissed anyone either, it's alright."
"But you like boys…" Catra whispered, and for a brief moment Adora could feel her breath on her lips.
Her eyes flickered over to Catra's hands in her own, giving them a gentle squeeze as she stroked them with her thumb. "I still wonder what it's like," The blush on her cheeks worsened in tenfold. "You know, kissing."
The tension between them was so thick you could cut it with a knife, both of them holding their breaths. "We… we could try?" Catra breathed out eventually.
Adora's breath on the other hand caught in her throat, as her gaze flickered to Catra's soft looking lips. She immediately wondered how they would feel against her own, if they were as soft as they looked or if they would be rougher. "Kissing? Each other?" Was all she managed to say as her brain overheated.
She didn't get a verbal answer, only a small nod indicating she had even heard Adora.
"Okay…" She whispered, before awkwardly shifting her position to face Catra better.
A clawed hand settled on her hip and another snaked around the back of her neck. She settled her arms around Catra's waist, as she stared into those beautiful blue and golden eyes. Then two lips pressed against her own, nothing else happened. Just both of them closing their eyes and pressing their lips together. Then they stopped and Catra looked at Adora thoughtfully. "I think we're doing it wrong."
Adora furrowed her brows, confused, but also getting what her friend meant. "Wrong how?"
"You know how they kiss in movies, right?" She nodded. "I think we need to try it that way."
They meet in the middle again, but this time it is different. Different in a way that makes Adora's lips tingle, her stomach churn, and her heart beat faster in her chest. Their lips slide together in a slow rhythm, teeth clash clumsily against each other, and hands grip tighter. It's messy and far from perfect, but it also is everything Adora could've imagined for a first kiss.
When they part their laboured breaths still brush against one another, their hands are still firmly planted on each other's bodies, and their cheeks are coloured in a deep red. She can still feel the ghost of Catra's lips on hers and the only word that comes to her mind is 'Wow'. She knows that that isn't the right thing to say though, so she just stayed quiet, staring dumbly at the girl in front of her that is supposed to be her best friend.
"Think we did it right?" Catra's voice is shaky and unsure, but she masks it with faux confidence.
"Yeah, I think we did…" She was still staring like an idiot at Catra by the time she'd climbed of off her and reached back out for her phone. Something in Adora's gut churned again and not in the same way it had moments ago. Why was she so casual when that had just happened?
Her eyebrows furrowed as she slowly made her way off the bed, standing up and getting her backpack. She was confused on more aspects than just one and staying here with Catra wouldn't help at all. "'Dor, what are you doing?"
"I forgot I had some… stuff I needed to do at home." Adora was a shitty liar and she knew it, Catra did as well judging from her expression. "You know, chores and stuff."
Her friend only rolled her eyes at her antics, before continuing to scroll on her phone. "Get home safe, dork." She saw the faint smile that played on Catra's lips, even if Catra would probably deny it if she ever brought it up. That small smile made her heart jump and her brain melt.
She needed to get out of here.
˗ˏˋ ♡ ˎˊ˗
The house was quiet and the driveway was empty, so her parents were probably both still at work. Quietly she entered the house, just in case someone else was home. She really didn't feel like dealing with anyone right now.
She stalked up the stairs and to her room, closing the door behind her and dropping her bag to the floor with a deep sigh.
It didn't have to mean anything. It didn't mean anything. Maybe kissing anyone would feel that good and it wasn't just the fact that it was Catra. She had kissed Catra.
She had kissed Catra.
Catra was a girl and she had liked kissing her, did that mean she liked girls? There was nothing wrong with that of course, liking girls is okay, great even. Catra liked girls and she was alright with that, but if Catra liked girls and she kissed Adora, did that mean Catra liked Adora?
She moved her spiralling over to her bed, fishing her computer out of her backpack and opening google. When Catra had come out to her she had told her about these quizzes she had taken, so maybe if Adora did those they would help her too?
Some of the questions freaked her out though, because why were they asking if she had ever had sex with a woman?! And yeah, she had kissed a girl, but only ten minutes ago! Did it even count when she and Catra had just wanted to know what it felt like. Going into those quizzes she didn't even know what she wanted the results to be, but she was only half surprised when the results said that she was probably a lesbian.
She was panicking and those messages at the bottom of the tests didn't help one bit. 'Just be yourself and love yourself.' 'Remember it's a beautiful journey and a long process.' 'Embrace your uniqueness.' Like that would actually help anyone calm down after discovering one of the most shocking things ever.
So, she was gay… Probably. Almost definitely. It wasn't like she had ever wanted to be with a boy, they were smelly, gross, and absolute assholes more often than not. So she was a lesbian. Big deal. Whatever.
As he sat in silence, panicking internally, even after her attempts at calming herself down, she heard someone walk around in the room next to her. Adam's room. Her brother had been home and she hadn't even noticed! She needed to delete her search history.
Wait, maybe this was a good thing. Maybe if Adam wasn't in one of his jerk moods, she'd be able to talk to him about all this. With shaking legs she got up from her bed and walked over to Adam's room. Before she opened the door she braced herself for the horrible sweaty smell that always lingered in his room, taking in one last deep breath and entering his room.
"Have you never heard of knocking?" His tone was annoyed, probably more from having his game being interrupted than her not knocking before entering.
She sat down on his bed, avoiding the dirty clothes that were thrown on it. "Can we talk about something?"
Adam groaned at that, but he left his game nonetheless. He turned in his chair and looked Adora up and down. "You look nervous." Even if he tried to hide it most of the time, he did care about Adora.
"I am."
"Okay then, what do you wanna talk about?" He moved over from his chair next to Adora, his gaze never leaving her once.
She did her best to calm her nerves, but just like before it was ineffective. Instead she just took a deep breath and spoke as fast as she could, trying to just get it out of the way. "I think I'm gay."
"I know."
Her mind had already been working on an explanation, only to short circuit and overheat again. "Huh?" Adam looked so casual and so unbothered, that it actually scared Adora. "What do you mean 'you know'?!"
Adam just shrugged, looking at Adora with a raised eyebrow and an amused smirk. "Adora, come on. You're, like, a walking rainbow. Plus, there's Catra."
"How do you know about Catra?!"
To her surprise Adam seemed actually surprised by that question. "Oh, so something finally happened." He mumbled to himself more than to Adora, then his eyes lit up with amusement and something else completely different. "You finally kissed, didn't you?"
Her shoulders sagged in defeat. "Yeah…" She stared at a particular spot on the floor, as Adam put an arm around her shoulder, pulling her into a sideways hug.
"You two are great for each other and you know I'll love you either way." Adora looked up, seeing Adam having the most disgusted expression ever on his face.
She let out a small breathy laugh, smiling at her twin brother. "That must've felt gross to say."
"Yes, yes it did. But it's true."
For a moment they just sat there, cuddling closer and laughing together. "Was it really that obvious?" She asked eventually, once their chuckles had calmed down and a tender silence had stretched over them.
"You never had a boyfriend, not even once talked about a boy you liked, and stress when a girl asks you the easiest of questions. That, plus you and Catra are inseparable."
"Most best friends are-" She tried to counter, only to be immediately shut up by Adam's laughter.
"Right, cause her wanting to sit on your lap is normal friend behaviour, right? 'Dor, there were hundreds of signs and I really don't feel like listing them all right now. I do want to know something, why are you here instead of with the girl you like so much?" Adam had that stupid grin on his face that indicated he knew he had a point.
"I panicked…"
Her face was turning more red by the second as Adam kept laughing, only adding to her embarrassment. "Then go back! You can be such an idiot sometimes. She likes you back, you dork. God knows I'll never get why, but she does."
She glared at him, hoping that it would kill at least some of his amusement. It didn't. "You don't know that for sure!" Even to her own ears it sounded like a weak excuse of an argument, she wasn't going to admit that to Adam though.
"With the way she looks at you, there is no doubt about it."
"What way?"
"Like you've created entire solar systems. She likes you, you have to trust me on this." He gave her shoulder a gentle squeeze, before getting up from the bed and walking back over to his desk to continue his game. "Go, 'Dor, and tell me how it went when you get back." His game started back up, urging Adora to leave his smelly and messy room.
When she stepped back into the hallway she took a deep breath of fresh air. She probably shouldn't do it, risk not only her own feelings, but also her friendship with Catra. Adora had always been bad at being selfish, and moments like these showed just how bad it could sometimes be for her. But then again, Catra and her had made a promise.
I'll always be your friend!
You promise?
I promise.
Maybe it had been a stupid promise between two naive six year olds, but it had stuck with them this long. Maybe they would be alright and maybe, just maybe, Catra would like her too.
Not long after she found herself hurrying down the stairs, shutting the door behind her and running through the streets of their neighbourhood like a madwoman. The late afternoon sun was burning in her back, but she couldn't care less. She just needed to get to Catra.
Not nearly soon enough she stood in front of Catra's house, her hand only hesitating for a small moment before knocking on the door. On the other side someone ran down the stairs, mumbling curses to themself before opening the door. "Hey Adora," Catra's cheeks were red again, though she tried to play it cool by leaning against the doorframe. "Back again?
"Can we talk?" Nerves were making her voice shaky, though she hoped it wasn't too noticeable.
Her friend stepped out of the doorframe, gesturing for Adora to come inside and follow behind her. They headed towards the backdoor that led to their porch. Catra sat down on the bench that looked out over the rest of their yard, patting the cushion next to her for Adora to join.
For a moment neither spoke, until Adora couldn't bear it anymore. "I'm so sorry for leaving so suddenly after we…" Her words trailed off, but Catra got her. She always got her.
"Kissed? Don't worry, I wasn't too bothered by it."
She raised an eyebrow at that. "Why? I messed up…"
Catra shrugged as she met Adora's gaze, the sun highlighting her freckles at this angle. "I knew you'd come back. You always come back." And just like that Adora's heart was on fire again. "It wasn't just… The kiss meant more, at least to me. I should've been clearer about that. I'm sorry too."
Adora's gaze was focused on the blue sky above them and the golden sun that was starting to dip lower and lower. Somehow, the view reminded her of the girl sitting next to her. "It meant more to me too, however I only realised it when I had already stormed outside."
Both girls chuckled at that, shoulders and muscles relaxing just a little more. "I don't like boys." Adora found herself saying eventually, not regretting her words for even a single second.
"I know, me neither." Catra said as both of them switched from staring out in front of them, to staring at each other.
Carefully Adora put her hand on Catra's, stroking her thumb over the back of her hand again, though this time the gesture meant so much more to the both of them. She raised her other hand to gently brush her finger tips through Catra's beautiful brown curls, careful not to tangle them. The sun caught her freckles perfectly, making them look like golden spots on her skin. Maybe one day she'd get to count them for real.
If everything would continue like this, her and Catra would be closer than ever before. "I think we did do it wrong last time…" Catra whispered, her eyes lost in Adora's.
"Then I guess we'll just have to try again." Adora whispered back, before closing her eyes and pressing her lips against Catra's again.
They were soft, she realised as she tried to enjoy every little detail, they also tasted faintly of sweet chapstick, though she couldn't recognize the flavour. It was sweet and very much like the first one, though knowing how they felt about each other somehow made it even better. She could stay like this forever, Catra beneath her fingertips, so close that their breaths would brush against each other, and sweet kisses stolen between the two of them.
She felt calm, like she hadn't in ages and she was sure it was all because of Catra. They did have to part eventually, to the dismay of both girls, because they were starting to run low on oxygen and were gasping for air. When both of them were able to breathe again, Adora put her arm around Catra's shoulder, tucking her friend's head underneath her chin.
"Think we did it right this time?" Adora asked as she brushed her fingers through the soft brown curls.
"Yeah, I think we did. Though, I suppose it wouldn't hurt to try again later."
"You're still a brat."
"And you're still a dork."
˗ˏˋ ♡ ˎˊ˗