Chapter Text
Drunk words are sober thoughts- Maxine Baker (or someone else she doesn't know)
Well...where do I begin..
Lately MANG started to become more like ANG, I felt like I was being left out of alot of shit, like them egging and Tping Abby's dad's house and them all trauma dumping about their problems without me
I had my issues, I would've loved to rant about the too...
And my parents are too busy worrying about my brother to even notice that I had completely stopped eating normally
My family hates me, my 'friends' hate me, and I felt like nobody would care if I dropped dead one day...but that all changed when I met..her
Her name was Nadia and God was she beautiful, she was one of these like gothic girls with black lipstick and a white face and she had this energy about her that pulled me in like a fish on a line..but there was one problem, she wouldn't even notice me
Y'know, being in your head constantly you tend to overthink everything and slit your wrists when you get in your head
But i finally got the chance to just talk to her when we were assigned to work together in an assignment in Science
"hey Space girl..pass the beaker" She held her hand out for me to give her the beaker
"O-oh yeah sorry"
My life had been particularly shitty lately, my parents were all worried about my brother because he was constantly binge drinking and I snitched on him so he could get help
I kind of regret what I did, because now, nobody in my family likes me, Marcus refuses my visits, my parents are constantly visiting him and when they aren't visiting him, they're obsessing over Marcus's next therapy session over dinner, it's exhausting I really wished I would've just kept my big mouth shut
When do I ever not make it about me and my problems..?
It's always been about me..
Maybe my friends hate me because I make everything about me, maybe my family hates me because I'm too much and I don't try hard enough
Ugh I just don't want to feel like this anymore..
After Science, where i failed the lab quiz after, I decided to skip the rest of the day and smoke in the forest behind the school, maybe slit my wrists and bleed out
But then I bumped into Nadia and her friends, Amber and Jayus who were drinking and smoking
"Hey, Space girl, you want a swig?"
"I have a name y'know, it's Max"
"Alright max, you want a swig?"
I took the bottle from Ryah and nearly downed the whole bottle in one go
"Damn Mad max"
After I nearly got drunk laughing and chatting with Nadia and her super cool friends, I decided that I didn't think I needed my old friend group as much
I mean it didn't seem like they needed me for the long run anyway so why should she care about them?
Maybe Ginny was right about one thing
"maybe we just...grew apart.."