Chapter Text
“Where is Dr Grace?”
It was a valid question, Olesya had to admit, he usually joined them for dinner before their evening lessons, making his absence notable. Even weirder that he’d cancelled their evening lesson entirely and not assigned them so much as a few papers to read, it was not like him at all. The man was a teacher through and through, so whatever he and Stratt were discussing in her office, it had to be incredibly important.
“Lovers spat.” She answered, trying hard not to laugh as the heads of her fellow astronauts snapped to her. They’d often taken to having meals together, it helped that most of them knew each other from past missions or at least past engagement events for them all. Hell, she’d been on the ISS with Emily Kim, her backup, a few years ago, and met Commander Rahul Kumar at least twice before. Only Shapiro and Dubois were new, and they’d hit it off well anyway.
She knew her phrasing could be considered a little unprofessional but she didn’t mind, there was nothing wrong with a little levity now and again, especially given at least three of the six of them sitting here would be dead in a few years and the world was ending. Neither Grace or Stratt was here to hear her, and nobody here would report it back. Besides, it wasn’t as if she was talking nonsense, there was clearly something between them, almost everyone could see it. She prided herself on being observant and understanding the people around her and though Grace and Stratt were both tough nuts to crack, almost everyone on the ship knew they had something going on. She’d say they were always one each others offices and standing side by side and checking on each other and such, except neither of them had enough time for the word ‘always’ to be relevant. Still, they were incredibly close and anyone could see it.
“What?”
“He and Director Stratt are in her office,” Yáo explained, "they were seen arguing before the door shut and they haven’t been seen since, both of their afternoons were cleared on the calendar.”
She had no idea how he knew that given he usually frowned on her love of gossip at least a little, but then he had arrived at the canteen at the same time as her, maybe he’d overheard part of her conversation with Georg.
“Aka, a lover’s spat.”
“They were arguing,” Rahul pulled a face, “uh oh.”
She could understand the concern, Grace and Stratt had their disagreements occasionally, but most of the time they were a united front, and especially in public. They did disagree from time to time, Grace was often the person who raised the complaints from other departments because he could get away with pushing back and arguing, but they usually kept it behind closed doors. He might question her in front of people but they almost never actually argued in the corridors or where people could hear. She’d felt the same way when Georg had caught her at the end of his shift as she was coming out of a systems lecture to tell her what he’d seen and heard as she walked to the canteen. The two of them had become fast friends for their shared enjoyment of gossip and his posting outside of Stratt’s office was ideal for it.
“Not bad argument,” she clarified, ”according to Georg, he was on shift outside her office when they went into it, I think it was over Grace doing press duties.”
“Ah.”
“So either it got worse and they‘re still yelling,” she posed to them, ”or it got heated and they’re taking a well earned moment alone.”
She wouldn’t fault them for a second if it was the latter. God only knew they both worked too hard and never took time for themselves and they were only human, they had to fall prey to human urges occasionally. She was certain once the launch had happened they’d finally take a break, hell she was willing to dedicate savings she no longer needed to buy them a few weeks of holiday somewhere warm and sunny and isolated. They had the literal weight of the world on their shoulders and if, once in a while, they needed to clear their afternoons and take some time to just be together or whatever, she couldn’t find any real problem with that.
“I refuse to believe either of them are that unprofessional.” Martin countered, “they take the project too seriously for that.”
Interesting phrasing given he and Annie had been hooking up and were not keeping it even a little bit secret.
“I can see it of Grace, maybe, but not Stratt.”
Emily choked on her drink at Rahul’s statement.
“You can see it of Grace?” She spluttered, “Really? Do we know the same Grace?”
“I mean he’d go along with just about anything Stratt asked of him. If she decided they could take that time without negative impacts, he might be more willing to do so.”
“But Stratt would never, so its a moot point.”
“That is true.”
“Also just wanted to point out that Grace seems to be one of the only people who can push back against Stratt, and often does.” Annie interrupted, “Including, according to Lesya, right before their calendars were cleared today.”
“So Dr Grace is about to never be seen again.”
“Oh come on Kumar, thats even more unlikely than them both clearing their calendars to ‘liaise’.”
“Liaise?”
“This is wholly unprofessional,” Yáo interrupted, before she could continue to mock Emily for using the word liaise, “we shouldn’t speculate about our superiors like this.”
Annie leant back in her chair.
“Nice to have the evening off though. I love Dr Grace and his lessons are great but you know standardised staining protocols was going to be a total bore.”
“From memory, it is a subject so dry not even Grace could make it engaging.” Dr Dubois agreed.
Yikes, that didn’t sound good. If even the biology nerds among them didn’t want to do it. Biology had never been her favourite subject, hence why she was an engineer not a biologist, but she’d always been ok at it and for the most part she’d been enjoying Grace’s lessons. The things about astrophage and the experiments they wanted the whole crew to know as a precaution, he managed to teach it exceptionally well. Some of the other biologists on the project seemed to forget that not all of them had that background, but Grace always managed to make sure the four of them without a background in biology could understand and keep up. Granted she knew Annie and Martin had their own, far more in depth, sessions with Grace too, but she still appreciated it.
“Wait, we’ve got the evening off entirely” Rahul looked stunned as he checked his calendar, ”he didn’t assign someone to cover it?”
“No.” Yáo answered, “Just cleared the calendar, including our lessons.”
“Oh.” The levity left Emily’s voice, “That’s not like Dr Grace.”
“I hadn’t really thought about it, but you’re right.” Olesya agreed, “That’s not like Dr Grace at all.”
“Do you think he’s ok?”
“I mean, I don’t think Stratt’s actually thrown him off the boat.”
“No but if anyone was going to have a stress induced heart attack on this damn ship it would be him.”
~.~
“Did you see,” Martin asked as he dropped his tray on the table next to them, “Dr Grace’s calendar has been cleared for the rest of the week?”
“What?”
Li-Jei hadn’t seen that yet. That was deeply concerning, one night at random was one thing, but a full week off was abnormal. Not just for the project itself but for Grace especially, the man worked hard he wouldn’t just step back like this unless there was something urgent.
“We have been given replacements for things this time,” Martin confirmed, “but he’s got the whole week off.”
“That is deeply concerning. I wonder what happened.”
“Lesya, you know anything?” Martin asked, “Since you seem to know everyone on the ship?”
“Since you asked, he stayed late in her office, like 2am late. Went back to his own room looking, in Frannie’s words, ‘wrecked, and not in a fun way’. And I mean depends on what you’re into but Frannie was pretty sure it wasn’t anything fun.”
He didn’t know why he was surprised she had an answer. Olesya really did know everyone and everything going on here on the ship.
“Shit.”
“Apparently Stratt told him ‘everything would be sorted out’ and something about his safety being paramount, but Frannie said she seemed really worried.”
“Stratt, worried?”
“Yeah. At least according to Frannie.”
“I don’t like the sound of any of that.”
“Yeah and Liza in legal…”
“Seriously how do you know everyone?” Martin interrupted.
“We hook up sometimes, anyway Liza in legal says they got a load of work down the line last night from Stratt that was pretty serious. She couldn’t tell me what but its has to be to do with this. And she said it was like, ‘a couple of people have fucked up badly enough to lose their jobs’ serious.”
“Hopefully not Dr Grace.” He couldn’t imagine the doctor would be one of them.
“Oh no, no, whoever’s in trouble, they’re not here on the Vat, it’s people from the ground teams. She was late because they were managing immediate loss of security clearance and recall notices and stuff, sounded like a real mess.”
“There’s no guarantee that has anything to do with Dr Grace though.” he didn’t want to jump to conclusions with half the information, “It could be unrelated.”
“Could be,” she agreed, “I don’t like it though.”
The whole thing made him very uncomfortable, and it wasn’t just that they were only working with some of the information. He did not think for a moment that Dr Grace had done anything to warrant losing his job, especially not if Stratt was as worried as Olesya claimed, but something had clearly occurred. Something that had kept Dr Grace in her office until the early hours then taken him off of work, vital work, for a week. For all that they were talking about legal it could just as easily be sickness, and he could only hope that if it was it wasn’t something severe. It would be a heavy blow to the project if Dr Grace could not continue with them.
He gathered everything together on his tray and stood.
“Where are you going?”
“To see if Dr Grace is well.”
“Commander?”
“If he has taken ill, or something so severe has happened that he needs to take time away from his work, I wish to check on him.”
He had come to consider Dr Grace a friend as well as a respected colleague, it only felt right to check and ensure he was well. His schedule was clear enough this morning that he could take the time to do so.
The rest of his crew did not join him. He had not necessarily expected them too, they had both barely started their breakfasts and had research sessions booked in for the morning. instead they only asked him to wish Dr Grace their best and inform them of how he was doing when they met up for their noon session on the current status of the development of the ship’s water systems. With that in mind, he stowed his empty tray and headed deeper into the ship.
Grace’s room was one of the few private rooms on the ship, privilege of rank, even if it wasn’t much bigger than a shoebox. It was, however, a fair way away from the main labs in the hanger, and the canteen. It would be easy to get lost on the way, if he wasn’t very used to aircraft carriers, new scientists being brought aboard still struggled with it, but he made his way there quickly enough. It was fairly close to Director Stratt’s room, though a fair distance from either of their offices. Probably why they both elected to sleep at their desks had the time instead. Not everyone could get to this part of the ship, even with the vetting everyone had been through, but he had clearance, and the guard stepped to the side as he passed.
“He’s not in his room, Sir.”
Li-Jei turned to the guard. He hadn’t even made it to Grace’s door before the guard had, clearly anticipating his intentions, spoken up.
“Hmm?”
“If you’re here to see Dr Grace, he isn’t here, sir.”
“No?”
Where would he be?
“No sir, he said he needed to go to the lab.”
“I thought he was not working today.”
“He’s not supposed to be.” The guard admitted, “But he insisted he needed to ‘do something’ and we had no orders to keep him in his room, so he went to the lab. Left five or so minutes ago.“
“Thank you.”
He turned on his heel and headed for the lab instead, yet another morning detour. Doctors Dubois and Shapiro had a lesson there this morning and would be able to inform him of Dr Grace’s status later, but he wanted to check himself. His own calendar was free until 09:30, when he had scheduled his own gym session and then study time, he still had time to check. If Dr Grace was well enough to head into the lab, even against orders, that was a good sign.
He could hear the argument before he even arrived.
“You’ve not even supposed to be in here.” Ah, Dr Faruk Beker looked as frustrated as he sounded as Li-Jei stepped into the lab. Dr Grace was standing at his station, the rest of the lab was only half full. Dr Beker stood across from Grace at his own desk with his arms crossed.
“I can work, I want to work. I’m fine.”
“Dr Grace…”
“I’m not here to teach or do anything major, just let me catch up on some experiments I’ve been meaning to run. My calendar is finally clear enough for me to do it.”
Li-Jei struggled to believe Grace could possibly have more work in mind than what he already did, more work than he was already doing. If he had been put on leave simply because he’d been overworking himself, the Director would not be pleased with this.
“Sure you’re not just here to monitor my class?” Dr Beker spat back, “Not sure you’d trust a ‘staggering waste of carbon’ to cover for you properly.”
He could have heard a pin drop. He had known there was a history between the two of them, one that had nearly ruined Grace’s career until Stratt had found him again, but nobody ever really spoke about it. Around it, yes, but not directly and not to his face. In truth the most he knew of it was in reference to how Olesya would have been far less magnanimous if she’d lost her job and then ended up being the boss of the person who’d tried to make sure they would never work again. Grace never seemed to gloat about it, at least not that he’d ever seen, he just got on with his work and expected everyone else to do the same.
“I shouldn’t have said that to you.”
“I’m sorry?”
“I shouldn’t have called you a waste of carbon, and I’m sorry. I… things in my personal life were messy and I should never have taken my anger out on you the way I did.”
“God he really is sick. Someone want to check him for a fever.”
“I’m serious Faruk, I never should have said that to you.”
“Doesn’t change that Stratt put you on leave.” Beker said, returning to the original argument, “you’re not supposed to be in here.”
“It’s just a few tests, running some numbers and double checking things, you’ll hardly know I’m here.”
It was a little odd to hear the doctor defend his position in his own lab. Everyone in this room worked for the man, but then his leadership style was very different from most. The head of research having to request time in his own lab was unnerving, but then, everyone answered to Director Stratt in the end.
“I mean I can’t stop you,” Beker sighed, “but on your head be it if the boss finds out.”
Everyone answered to Director Stratt in the end.
Still, that seemed to be the end of the argument and everyone was now more or less returning to their work. Dubois and Shapiro still hadn’t arrived for their lesson, which he could now presume Beker was covering, and he was now lingering in the doorway. That had not quite been his intention.
“Commander Yáo?” Grace asked, brows furrowing with concern,”Is something wrong?”
Wrong? With him? Grace was asking if he was ok. He supposed he wasn’t scheduled to be here, and an out of the blue visit could signify an issue.
“I was hoping to ask if you were well? On behalf of myself and the rest of the crew.”
Dr Grace nodded as he sank down into his chair, running a hand though his hair. He didn’t look especially well, he looked exhausted. Bags under his eyes, eyes that were still a little red rimmed, paler than normal and just generally worn. Even his voice sounded a little scratchy, and he could only wonder again what the hell had happened last night.
“I’m fine, really. Last night was… unexpected, but I’m fine.”
The bags under his eyes and pallor of his face didn’t really quite seem to line up with that, but Li-Jei didn’t want to push it. It wasn’t his place.
“That is good to hear.”
“I am sorry I had to cancel on you all. I will find a time to reschedule it that doesn’t clash with everything else and soon.”
Of course that was what Dr Grace was worried about. Well, they had all agreed that the cancellation was very out of character for him but it still felt like the less important thing here.
“I’ve been in the space programme and the military long enough to know that sometimes things come up at the last minute, I was more concerned about your wellbeing than the schedule.”
“I… thank you. But I am ok.”
“Then I will leave you to work, Doctor.”
He did not want to be in the way or overstay his welcome. Grace said he was well, and whether he believed it or not, he was leaning closer to not, he could inform the others of that soon.
“Ah, Commander, before you go, could I borrow you for a moment?”
He turned to see Dr Lokken just arriving, setting up her own desk station.
“Ma’am?”
“I was wondering if you could go over some information with me, I mentioned it at the last SLT meeting but we haven’t had time since.”
Yes, she’d wanted to clarify some of the information from their piloting simulations and how it would effect equipment up in space. She had a set of parameters for him to test, but they’d yet to have the chance to sit and go over it.
Well, now was as good as ever.
He took an offered chair at her desk and let her lay out some of the things they needed to check. Some of it they could probably pass up to the current ISS crew, but other things they’d need to throw into the simulator and see what happened.
“Dr Grace? Are you alright?”
He looked up, curious what Knepp had seen and finding it immediately. Grace’s hands were shaking, badly. He might not have noticed it if not for the pipette he couldn’t keep still. He’d never seen Dr Grace with anything less than a completely steady hand, and this could not be more different. Violently trembling, and he was almost certain Grace’s focus was not entirely on what he was doing, going through the motions but not as grounded as he’d want to be.
“Grace, seriously,” Beker sounded more worried than frustrated, “go get some rest.”
“I’m…”
“You’re not fine. You can’t hold the equipment steady and you are always the first person to remind everyone else that astrophage is not to be taken lightly. If these tests have to be run then write the parameters down so someone else can do it, but you shouldn’t be here right now.”
Grace lay the pipette down and pulled off his gloves with a deep sigh.
“I know, I just… don’t really want to sit alone in my room doing nothing when there’s so much to be done.”
He could relate to that. It was part of why he’d volunteered for the project, the idea of sitting around and doing nothing when there was something he could do was unthinkable.
“I think Dr Komorov’s team are running some tests of their own up on deck,” he offered, ”you could go and observe those.”
He hoped the suggestion came off as helpful, rather than in some way dismissive. Dr Grace and Dr Komorov were good friends and the fresh air might do the Dr some good, a work based distraction without him actively needing to do anything. If he did not wish to be alone in his room, and Li-Jei understood that well enough, then he hoped it would be a good alternative.
“I… yeah… that sounds like a better idea. I can come back to this, nobody touch it.”
Everyone more or less retuned to their work as Grace packed up, the room going a little too quiet as he swayed slightly when he stood then organised a few things in a way that made sense to him and walked out of the lab. Only once he was gone did the quiet chatter resume.
“Do you think he’s ok?” Knepp asked.
“No." Beker scoffed, “Absolutely not.”
“Do we tell Director Stratt about this?”
“I have no idea.”
~.~
Dimitri had not expected Grace to appear on the flight deck minutes before his test was due to run. For just a moment it turned his stomach, Grace might have been his friend but this was a professional environment and he hadn’t expected this test to be an observed one. In truth, he didn’t think the results were going to be fantastic, in fact he expected they would be poor, but such results were necessary for development sometimes. Necessary, but not something he really wanted being observed for progress when all it would be doing is crossing off things that weren’t going to work rather than finding something that would. He’d been planning on writing up the results and sending them to Grace and Stratt later. Well, just Stratt, Grace was supposed to be on sick leave.
Grace was supposed to be on sick leave.
His head snapped back to his friend, walking over with his yellow coat and a cup of something steaming in his hands, as though this were a completely normal morning. As though he wasn’t on sick leave, and Dimitri knew he was because it had been mentioned in an SLT memo excusing him from some of the meetings this week. Given he could count on one hand the number of meetings Grace had missed since the project started and still have four fingers left over, it had somewhat stood out that Grace was unwell enough not to be attending anything for a whole week. He’d been planning on checking on him after lunch, when he had a moment.
Why the hell was he here?
Well, Dimitri was nothing if not a big believer in the direct approach, and so he walked right over to Dr Grace with a smile and a welcoming one-armed hug.
“My friend, I wasn’t aware you were coming to observe today.”
“I’m not, at least not officially, I just needed something to do and Stratt’s decided I’m not working this week.”
“Ah.”
Interesting phrasing.
'Stratt’s decided'. He couldn’t imagine the director would do so without good reason, she more than most understood the importance of the project and Grace’s role in it. If she’d decided he was not working, and for a whole week, she probably wouldn’t be happy Grace was here. And yet, Grace had made it clear he wasn’t here officially, he’d probably tried his luck going to the lab and not been allowed and at least here he had the excuse that he was just looking for fresh air or something to that effect. It was a smart move, though he was not sure it was smarter than actually taking the rest he clearly needed. He had the feeling Grace wouldn’t appreciate it if he said that though.
“You wish to see what we are working on, well, that is a good choice. We’re testing some new parameters for the spin drives.”
“Output moderation, I remember you saying, I’m excited.”
Normally, he would believe so, Grace had a finger in every pie on this project, and he was genuinely interested in every part of it. Unfortunately, today he was not so certain that was true. It seemed almost as though there was a haze over Grace’s eyes, his fingers were twitching a little, and his shoulders were hunched. It almost seemed as if he was scared, as though something was going to leap from the shadows, but they were on the Vat and things were fine. Combined with the deep bags under his eyes and the rumours already spreading and he was starting to get very concerned for his friend.
Still, they had tests to run and talking it through to Grace as they did it might well help him work through the bugs in the plan, so to speak. He was sure grace wouldn’t mind being a sounding board for him.
As the tests went on it became painful clear that Grace was even less alright than he’d initially appeared. Almost no questions, follow ups or theories of his own, all things he’d have expected of Grace in a test like this on a normal day. He’d been right in his sounding board theory, they’d definitely found a few problems they could fix between running the tests and bounding the ideas off of Grace, but his friend’s head clearly wasn’t in it.
“You are distracted, my friend.”
“I… that obvious?”
“You are usually abuzz with questions and yet, today, silent. Are you well?”
“I… maybe. Didn’t sleep much, I’m not sick or anything, but I’m not at my best, I guess.”
“Well, if you ever need to talk, or just want to drink away the world’s problems for a night, I am always available.”
He would not pry further, not now, anyway. Not only were they focused on this work today, but he got the district feeling Grace had no desire to talk about it. If his friend wished to share his problems with him, then he would of course be available to talk, or listen, or whatever he needed, but only when Grace was ready.
“Thanks, I might take you up on that, at some point.”
“I would perhaps suggest that once this test is done you attempt to get some rest. My friend, you look terrible.”
Grace huffed a laugh.
“Thanks.”
~.~
Lokken did her best to work on normal timeframes. Her days of all nighters and weird hours were well over, or so she’d hoped, but then she hadn’t really expected to end up on a project like this. Oe day she’d been in a 9-5, the next she’d been here, on a boat, doing all of this. Coming into the lab in the middle of the night should have been a thing of the past, and yet it was exactly what she was doing now.
The last thing she’d expected was to see Grace at his desk, lit by only his laptop.
“Here I thought you’d been banned from the lab.”
He spun in his chair, raising both hands in surrender.
“I’m just reading. I had some ideas, wanted to see if past research lined up or refuted it.”
“At 2am?”
“I couldn’t sleep. You?”
“Checking on the some of the cell experiments, they need to be checked every six hours.”
“Ah. Couldn’t get an intern to do it?”
“I suppose I could have, but it has been nice to be back in the lab like this. I’m sure you can relate to that.”
Even after almost nine months on the project, she wasn’t tired of being back in a lab as opposed to primarily at a desk. She hadn’t realised how much she’d missed it. Grace said he loved being a teacher, and she imagined that was true, but she could tell from the way he worked, he had missed it too.
“Yeah. I can indeed.”
“Speaking of, I heard you apologised to Beker the other day? Can’t believe I missed it.”
“I did.”
“Damn. What inspired that?”
She didn’t mean for it to come off quite so bluntly, but this was a very well known rivalry and Beker had been working under Grace for a year now, begrudgingly. Why now had he apologised, and not before? What had brought it up? He and Beker hadn’t been at odds, exactly, but she knew Beker had not been best pleased to be working under the man who’s career he ended, and that things had been, awkward was probably the best word. Strained. Why now had he chosen to bridge that gap?
Grace clasped his fingers together and rubbed his thumb against his knuckle. It looked like a nervous, unconscious action, but now that she thought about it, it was one she’d seen before.
“I… should have done it sooner.”
“You mean before you left academia over your pride?”
“That wasn’t why I left academia.”
His tone was sharper than she’d expected.
“That’s something everyone knows about you, Grace, your reputation kind of precedes you on that one.”
“Its something everyone thinks they know about me.” He corrected, ”But it’s not why I left.”
“Oh.”
She didn’t really know what else to say to that. Grace’s reputation had far preceded him, he was, as she’d said the first time they met, infamous. He’d refused to back down over his theories, which in itself might have been fine, but had been so unwilling to back down that it had cost him his job before he’d vanished from academia entirely, in a move everyone had deemed cowardice and a refusal to face criticism or challenges to his work. She’d never met him before the day she’d been recruited, and that reputation hadn’t quite fit with the man she’d worked with for the past year, but she’d just assumed he’d mellowed with age or the severity of the situation. She’d never considered that there had been another cause entirely.
He fiddled his hands again before seemingly catching himself and dropping them to his side. There was something haunted and slightly distant in his gaze that unnerved her more than she’d be keen to admit.
“Things got… very messy, in my personal life. I was in a pretty bad place for a while, mentally and physically, that’s what pulled me out of research. I didn’t want to leave, I didn’t choose it.”
“You’ve never mentioned that before, not that I don’t believe you, I do, I just… why let the rumour continue if it wasn’t true? It’s been a brand on your name and reputation for years.”
“It’s not something I like to talk about, or think about. Frankly I’d rather people think I was a coward who ran away from criticism, or a madman who refused to back down from my standpoint, than talk about it. And I do stand by my research.”
“Of course you do.”
She was almost relieved at the slight laugh she got from him at that.
“So Beker?”
“Bad timing. I lashed out, my anger wasn’t for him and I shouldn’t have directed it at him. You know, I desperately wanted to be at the conference just so things could feel normal for once, royally messed that up.”
That didn’t sound good, but it sounded a lot more like the man she’d gotten to know over the last year.
“What changed, why apologise now?”
“Stratt and I had a talk, and some things came up. Figure if I'm actually facing it I should face it properly and at least fix that.”
A talk. The talk. The one they’d had a few days ago in Stratt’s office, leading to his time off. There was talk of it all over the ship, so many theories about Grace, and why he’d been put on sick leave right after. Concern over his wellbeing, an above normal level of theories on Grace and Stratt’s relationship, professional or otherwise, it was half of all anyone was talking about. It had to be that conversation. What they hell had they discussed that would lead to Grace apologising to Beker? What the hell had happened that he was sitting in the lab in the dark at 2am because he couldn’t sleep?
“Must have been a hard conversation… I’m not prying, you don’t have to tell me anything, I’m just… you’re ok?”
“Well, I’m not dying, so thats something.”
“Some of the bio and bioengineering teams have been worried you’re sick, something serious…?”
That had been her theory. A diagnosis like cancer or something equally serious that could end his life, or at least his time here, if he had to seek treatment back on land. A terminal diagnosis, a shorter timeframe than the rest of them to find solutions and contribute something to save the world, that had been her fear. She would have expected Grace to try and work through it, to keep working to the end, to show up in the lab and work instead of thinking about what was coming for him. She’d been very worried for him. He probably had no idea how reliving his joking ‘not dying’ was to hear.
“No, no, I… nothing like that. I’m not sick.”
“That’s good to hear.”
Extremely good to hear. She may have been a little put off by his reputation at first, and maybe a little bit how absolutely steadfast he was in defending his opinions and theories, but she’d grown to appreciate him as a professional and a colleague. She’d come to realise she couldn’t imagine working on this project without him.
“Need any help checking the cells?”
“I’m still under the impression you’re banned from this lab for a few more days.”
~.~
Li-Jei paused on the flight deck as they walked back in from training. Above them, one one of the open air platforms near the bridge, were Grace and Stratt.
“Damn,” Olesya said from his left, looking exactly where he was, “Grace looks really stressed.”
She was right. Even though they couldn’t hear a word, Grace did look incredibly stressed, or distressed, he wasn’t sure which. They didn’t seem to be arguing, but even from this distance he could tell their discussion was intense. Grace was gesturing a lot as he spoke, and after a few moments, Stratt rested a hand on his shoulder. It seemed to help, he all but deflated, leaning slightly into the touch.
“He looks exhausted,” Martin commented, “has all week.”
They didn’t linger and watch, it wasn’t their place, but the conversation didn’t stray as they walked down to the rec room. They had some time before their run on the simulator this afternoon and they all wanted to decompress before they spent four hours in a confined space. He had to agree that Grace was looking worse now than he had at the start of the week, more hunched and more stressed. The bags under his eyes were worse and he had it on fairly good authority he wasn’t sleeping well, being found a few times at night in the lab or on deck or somewhere else, working or reading. Apparently he’d refused outright to be prescribed something to help him sleep better despite his clear inability to get any.
The only people in the rec room when they arrived were a few of the scientists, one of Dr Grace’s biologists Dr Charlie Knepp and one of Dr Lamai’s doctors, Amirah Khalil. He wasn’t surprised, it was technically the middle of the day, their schedule just lined up differently from everyone else’s. He was a little surprised the two of them were in here at all, though if he remembered correctly they were working on something together, there was every chance they’d hit a wall and were taking a moment to eat something and reset before going at it again.
“I do wonder what they were talking about this time, it has to be the same as before, right. Grace seemed really upset and the only person he’s taking to is Stratt.”
How concerned was Olesya that there was no joke in there about their relationship?
“I’d guess it was about the divorce again,” Knepp spoke up, “I heard him and Stratt talking about it in the lab the other day before she dragged him out, well, bits and pieces.”
“Divorce?”
That was new information. He hadn’t even known the doctor was married. He couldn’t think of a single time he’d mentioned any sort of relationship, or family back on the mainland, beyond his students.
“Yeah, sounds like the relationship was a shitshow. From what I overheard, he actually filed a few years ago, but his ex has been giving him hell ever since, the paperwork still hasn’t gone through and Grace has been stalked and harassed, like, majorly harassed. Sounds like it was a complete nightmare, right up until he came here. Not sure what’s brought that up now though.” Knepp finished like she’d been talking about the weather, before taking another bite of her sandwich.
“Media duties.”
The words slipped out before the thought had finished forming in his brain.
“What?”
“Grace and Stratt were arguing,” he turned to Olesya, "you said it was over Grace doing media duties.”
She nodded, clearly catching his thought, “If I had a stalker I wouldn’t want to get on camera.”
It made sense. The conversations with Beker in the lab about his personal life being messy right before he left a job he’d enjoyed and was clearly skilled at, the way he’d been acting when he had made it clear he wasn’t sick, at least not physically. Stress would account for it, the shaking hands, the way he’d been jumpy and clearly not sleeping. Sneaking back into the lab time and again to distract himself and focus on something else, all because he’d been forcibly reminded of his stalker and the imminent fear that instilled. He supposed it was better than some form of terminal sickness or something of that nature, but it still wasn’t ideal.
“I can’t imagine someone doing something like that to Dr Grace. I mean I’m glad he’s not sick but for a divorce to have him so stressed, that can’t be good.”
“I’m amazed security didn’t pick it up soon…” he trailed off as another piece of the puzzle slotted into place.
The message from Director Stratt to legal, the oversight they were fixing after the meeting. They’d missed it originally, that had been the issue, they’d failed to discover a key security risk regarding one of the highest ranking members of the project that could have put him in danger and Stratt had only discovered it when she’d asked him to take on a public facing post. No wonder she was furious, stalkers could easily turn dangerous, especially if there really was a history between them, Dr Grace could have been in serious danger without them being prepared for it. If his ex had managed to get their hands on him, to hurt him or take him or worse, it would have been a catastrophe.
“Dr Grace is a married man.” Martin seemed genuinely taken aback, “I had no idea.”
He felt the same way. Never once had Dr Grace mentioned a spouse, though now that Li-Jei thought about it, he often fiddled with his finger when he was stressed or nervous, something he’d been doing far more in the last week. His ring finger, as though he were twisting a ring. He’d probably ditched the ring years ago, but not the habit.
“If he was already filling for divorce,” Olesya asked, with a half-smile forming, ”is what he has with Stratt cheating?”
Martin rolled his eyes with a sigh, dropping his head.
“You know he might not actually have anything like that with Stratt?”
“Oh come on, look at them.”