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He can feel the infection flowing through his veins– cold and metallic, uncaring of anything other than making him a mindless metal zombie. He thought they'd won. He thought he and Silver had got rid of the virus for good. He thought this was over.
It's creeping into his heart and mind. His thoughts are foggy, and his body aches with a foreign pain he'd never wish on his worst enemies. But he can't stop running.
If he stops, it's over. He runs, and runs, and runs. Through metallicized villages and abandoned cities. Past the hobbling hordes of Zombots. Everything gleams unnaturally in the moonlight, blinding him as he runs. He doesn't know how much more of this he can take.
Everything he's worked so hard to protect is dying in front of his eyes, and he can't stay still long enough to help. He hears Tails– his sweet baby– talking to him through their comm, but he can't make out the words.
He doesn't know what day it is, or how long he's been running. Nothing makes sense anymore. He hears voices all around him, screaming his name.
He slows down. Not on purpose– it feels like his body is giving up on him. The metal is weighing him down. It pulls at his ankles and wrists, it drags through his quills, and no matter how much he tries to speed up, he can feel himself getting stuck. His feet stop responding to him. He trips on a tree root, slamming his jaw into the dirt below him painfully. He tries to push himself up, but his legs don't work.
Why aren't his legs working? Why can't he feel his legs-? He manages to get into a kneeling position, and when his legs are finally visible, he understands. They're completely metal. It's creeping past his knees, up his thighs and hips.
He doesn't understand; he did what he was supposed to! Running keeps the virus at bay– why didn't it work? He needs to keep running– he needs to keep moving! He sinks his claws into the ground, pulling himself desperately. He needs to move! He can't die here, people need him.
"Sonic," A voice calls his name. His head whips up, confused. He's in the middle of nowhere. Who's talking to him? From the trees, a pink figure emerges. For a moment, Sonic can't help but light up. It's Amy! But a closer look at his darling friend makes his heart drop like a stone. There's that same sickening metallic sheen across her body.
"No.." He whispers. How did this happen? Wasn't she at the Restoration? How is she here– how is she infected? He opens his mouth, but no sound comes out as he tries to speak. She stares at him, those red eyes uncaring as she repeats his name over and over again, voice hollow and robotic.
"Sonic. Sonic. Sonic."
He raises his dirt-stained hands to his ears, trying to block out the sound, but her voice pierces through like nothing.
"Sonic." Another voice. No. He knows that voice. It's Knuckles. But that's impossible, he's meant to be on Angel Island, far, far away from this mess. He shakes his head, trying to squeeze his eyes shut, but the cruel universe doesn't allow him to. All he can do is stare as the Zombots he once called his friends close in on him.
He can't move. He can still hear Tails' voice through the comm, speaking nonsense. He can't understand his baby brother's words– Gaia, he wishes he could. He wishes he could talk. Say goodbye to his brother before he's consumed.
His own virus is steadily climbing his body, paralysing him completely. He can't feel anything past his waist, and it continues to crawl up his torso and to his chest.
Knuckles' clawed, metal hands reach for him, and he can't do anything to stop it. The Zombot grabs at his quills harshly, in a way that Knuckles never would. Then, Amy kneels, hooking a teasing, sharp finger under his chin and forcing his head up. She makes him look into those eyes.
"You failed," Amy's voice whispers, taunting and gargled. Her nail draws blood, and it drips down Sonic's throat and soaks into his already filthy fur. He can't look away; she keeps him there. He feels her infection threatening to seep into him, but as it reaches out to latch onto him, Robot Amy is knocked away. The pressure on his quills is released, and for a moment, he breathes.
Until he sees what knocked them off of him.
Tails. His baby boy.
With metal crawling up his arms.
Tails doesn't get a chance. Amy and Knuckles are on top of him in seconds, holding him down and infecting him thoroughly and irreversibly. Finally, Sonic's voice comes back to him, and he screams.
He tries to get up, he uses all the strength he can muster, but he just falls over again, pitiful and useless as his brother gets forcefully turned into one of those metallic nightmares. He claws at the floor, tears streaming down his face.
"TAILS–" He rasps, he begs, "Tails! No– No! Tails-!" His words fall on deaf ears. He hears Tails screaming, his little voice going hoarse as he screams for his big brother. Sonic can't move. He can't reach him. Tails pleads with Amy as if she could hear him. She doesn't listen.
He watches as the tips of his child's tails harden over with that unmistakable glint.
His baby is gone. He watched it all happen, and it's all his fault.
He can't breathe. He can't breathe. The infection is in his lungs, crawling up his throat, down his arms. But he's still painfully aware. He can feel his Chaos energy fighting it back, and it's excruciating. Why won't the world just end his suffering?
"Because you failed, Sonic." A final voice speaks. One that sends chills through the parts of his body he can still feel. That voice.. he knows it as intimately as his own.
In one final act of cruelty, the universe forces him up into a kneeling position one last time, so he can see.
Shadow looks back on him, mirroring his pose. The dark hedgehog is on his knees in front of Sonic, metal spreading through him like all the others.
That isn't what hurts, though. It's the emotions on Shadow's face.
Fear. Betrayal. Anger. Acceptance. Grief.
"Why did you let him live, Sonic?" Shadow asks, voice quiet and dull. Tears roll down Sonic's cheeks, warm against the chill of the virus.
"Shadow-" He speaks, voice broken, "Shadow– I'm so sorry–"
"It's too late, Sonic. I'm dying," He states bluntly, "I'm dying, and everyone else is dead. You failed, all because you let the Doctor live."
"I'll– I'll get Silver! We can destroy it! We can–"
"Silver's gone. He's infected. Everyone is. This is the end of the line, Sonic."
Shadow pauses, then, tilting his head in that curious way that Sonic adores oh so much.
"Don't worry, though, you won't die. You're too strong for that. This is your existence now, Sonic. You've made your bed."
A sob falls from Sonic's lips, and his body shakes violently. He tries to reach a hand out to his lover, but once again, he's rooted. He can't even reach out to his partner in his last moments. Shadow stands, one of his eyes already taken over by that sick, uncaring look.
He turns away from Sonic, and he walks, leaving Sonic alone to his eternal demise.
"Shadow, please!" Sonic calls, desperate. Shadow said he isn't going to die. Is this it for him? Will he exist in this hell forever? Never fully infected and never fully cured? Alone?
Shadow doesn't turn around. He walks away with a finality that makes Sonic's heart break into cold, metallic shards.
He's about to call out again, selfish but so terrified, but before he can, Shadow stops. And then he drops.
Sonic shrieks, reaching out,
"Shadow-! Shadow- get up," He begs, trying to get closer. Unlike with Tails, it seems that he's allowed to move this time, and he drags his dead weight. He can't stop the sobs from escaping his lips when Shadow doesn't move, despite Sonic's screaming. This can't be the end, it can't.
By some Gaia-given miracle, he reaches his partner. It's hard to manoeuvre an entire body when his own body is working against him, but Sonic manages to flip Shadow over, cradling him in his metallic blue lap and arms.
Shadow's entire face is metal, but he doesn't wake up. He doesn't grow hostile like he's meant to. He just… lies there, unmoving.
"Shadow, Shadow please, I can't watch this again, please– please Shads," he keens, a grief-filled, horrified sound as his lover lies heavy in his lap. He tries to cradle Shadow's face, but his metal hands are too heavy and slippery, and they refuse the tender touch.
"Shadow, please," he hiccups. He cries. He weeps.
Nothing changes.
And then a feeling of pure agony engulfs his body. He screams, eyes rolling back as the infection and his Chaos energy battle inside of him. It's under his skin; he needs it OUT. He can't breathe, he can't move.
His body shakes.
He can't see, his vision whites out with pain– or maybe it's the panic?
His chest is tight. He's dying, he feels himself dying.
"—ic?"
His baby is gone. Tails, his Tails.
"–nic!"
He couldn't even do anything about it. He just watched as his child was killed in front of his eyes.
"Sonic?!"
His lover is dead in his arms, a metallic corpse.
He's dying. He'll never truly die, though. He'll suffer like this forever. It's what he deserves.
"SONIC!"
Sonic's eyes shoot open, and he flies up, panting and wheezing. He can't breathe. Where is he? What's going on? He clutches and claws desperately at his chest, limbs stiff and tense. Frantically, he looks around, trying to place his surroundings. His room. He's in his room. How is he in his room? He was just in a forest, pathetically splayed out on the grass. Is life truly cruel enough to give him one last glimpse of his past comfort before ripping it away forever?
Something touches his forearm, and he reels back, slamming his head into the wall behind him. It vibrates through his skull and blurs his already unfocused vision with a pounding pain.
"Don't–!" He rasps. Whatever– or whoever– is touching him will be infected. He can't let that happen again. He can't.
"Sonic, it's me– look at me," The voice instructs, solid and kind. Shadow.
No. No no no– he can't let Shadow get near him. He'll infect him– he'll kill him. As the figure of his partner draws closer, he scrambles, falling off the edge of his bed and onto the floor as he tries to create as much distance between himself and Shadow.
"Don't touch me– you'll get infected– the virus– please-!" He hyperventilates. He can't get enough air into his lungs. He's suffocating. He's dying. A broken sob falls from his lips as he presses into the corner of the room like a caged animal.
Shadow kneels in front of him, reaching out a patient hand.
"Sonic," he murmurs, voice smooth, "there is no virus. You destroyed it, remember?" he explains.
The words barely reach Sonic's panicked mind. He still flinches as the hand draws nearer, hovering just within the blue hedgehog's space.
"No- No– Shadow, I can feel it. It's back– it–"
"It's not, baby," Shadow soothes, "I need you to trust me. Do you trust me?"
Of course Sonic trusts him. Most days, Sonic trusts Shadow more than himself. But he can feel the metal under his flesh– cold and stifling.
"I– I can't-" he stutters, the words dying on his tongue. Shadow shushes him kindly and asks one more time,
"Sonic, do you trust me?"
Sonic nods. He trusts Shadow, even when he can't trust anything else in the world; he will always trust Shadow.
Shadow moves forward, and Sonic instinctively flinches away, closing his eyes as he braces.
A feather-light touch graces his cheek. Warm and real. It burns Sonic's skin. He waits for the feeling of the infection clawing up his body, desperate to travel into Shadow. Nothing happens. Just warmth from where Shadow's touching him.
"Open your eyes, Sonic," Shadow encourages, his thumb caressing the blue hedgehog's cheek in sweet, circular motions. The soft voice coaxes him just enough, and he hesitantly peels an eye open, waiting to see the metallic sheen of the virus blind him.
Instead, Shadow's soft fur greets him. His quills are somewhat messy, but they're real. So painfully real. Shadow's eyes are gentle and fond, despite the worry swimming in them.
"See? No metal. No virus." He mumbles lovingly, raising his other hand to cradle Sonic's face completely.
Sonic releases a heavy breath, the stress and adrenaline draining from his body as he scans his lover. No metal. No virus. Tears well up in his eyes, and Sonic doesn't know whether it's from fear, relief, or a combination of both. He leans heavily into Shadow's hands, bringing his own up to trail Shadow's arms and shoulders, checking for any cold, unnatural spots. Shadow tilts his head, but shifts closer, allowing Sonic to do as he pleases.
"Shadow–" Sonic eventually whispers, the one simple word catching in his throat as he chokes it out. Shadow hums, and finally, after confirming that there's not a drop of metal marring his lover's skin, Sonic throws himself into his arms. Shadow's arms wrap around him tightly, and he cradles him between his legs as Sonic curls up and weeps.
"Shadow it was— everyone was infected– I thought–" The words are jumbled and broken, making no sense, but Shadow nods along anyway.
"I know, it was just a nightmare, Sonic. We're all safe. You're safe," Shadow comfortingly murmurs as Sonic tries to catch his breath and explain himself. He breathes in the familiar scent of his partner– the lavender and coffee mixed with an underlying cologne that Sonic doesn't care to place, helps his heart rate slow down as he recenters himself in reality.
His death grip on Shadow's quills slowly loosens into a slack hold, and his body melds into the dark hedgehog's as he lets Shadow hold up his weight. He takes a deep, long breath, and tries to speak once again.
"I couldn't move," he whispers into Shadow's neck, "I was stuck. I could feel the infection inside me, and it completely rooted me. Everyone was metal– Amy and Knucks– and I could just…watch.." Another shiver runs through him, and Shadow gives him a reassuring squeeze. The ground isn't the most comfortable, and surely Shadow's limbs are in pain from holding both of their weights on the hard floor, but, gracious Shadow, he doesn't complain.
"It sounds terrifying," Shadow hums. Sonic nods; it was more than terrifying. Watching his friends turn into those metal monsters. Watching his baby brother…
"Hey, Sonic– what is it–?" Shadow asks hurriedly, and only then does Sonic realise he's stiffened up again at the thought of Tails.
"Tails– Tails got infected– he turned right in front of me and– and I couldn't–" He shakes his head, not able to finish it,
"And then you–! You," he gasps, recalling the words that dream Shadow said to him. Shadow pulls away slightly to look into Sonic's eyes, frowning,
"What happened to me?" He asks patiently, thumbing away a stray tear from Sonic's face. Sonic hesitates, but one look in Shadow's eyes reminds him that this is his Shadow, not some twisted dream replica.
"You were infected, and you told me I failed.. you– you asked me why I let t–the Doctor live– Shadow you–" he swallows, averting his eyes again, "you were dying, and you walked away– then you fell and you wouldn't respond and–" He's shaking again. Shadow grabs Sonic's hands and presses them to his face, pressing soft kisses into his tan palms,
"Hey, hey," Shadow shushes, "you didn't fail, faker."
The nickname that's usually used teasingly takes on a fond lilt in the intimate atmosphere of the room. It relaxes Sonic; it reminds him that this is real, this is real and there is no virus and he's SAFE.
"But– it was all my fault. If I'd just dealt with Eggman when he'd lost his memories, none of that would've happened!" Sonic has been living with this guilt for a long time. Mainly every time he sees Espio. The chameleon has long forgiven him (he thinks? With Espio, it's hard to tell), but every time Sonic sees him, he can't wipe the terrified face of his ninja friend from his memory. Watching as Vector sacrifices himself to keep the horde back, having to retrieve the Chaos Emerald by himself because Sonic's mistake took his team from him.
It reminds him that he fucked up. He didn't listen when Espio and Shadow told him to deal with 'Mr. Tinker', and he made the choice to let Metal Sonic back into the wild after taking him down. The result of those decisions was world-ending. He can't take that back.
"I should've just listened," he chokes out, "You were right– I just–" He shuts his eyes, trying to hold back the new wave of tears from flowing.
"Maybe you should have," Shadow agrees, making Sonic flinch backwards, but he holds Sonic's hands steady on his face, leaning into them fondly, "But then you wouldn't have been you." He finishes. Sonic scrunches his eyebrows, confused.
"Sonic. You believe in second chances. That's who you are, in here," he removes a hand from Sonic's and presses it against Sonic's chest, right on his heart, "Nothing we said or did could've changed your decision. And that's okay. Because it wasn't your fault." Those words hit Sonic like a bullet. He exhales like he's been punched. Shadow's hand trails up his chest, to his shoulder, and around his neck to cup his head delicately.
"Had it not been for Starline, you'd have given that man a new lease on life. That is nothing to be ashamed of, Sonic. You did what you thought was right; you always do. And yes, sometimes it will backfire, but that doesn't mean you should regret it." Shadow pulls him close, planting a kiss on his forehead.
Sonic's… never thought of it like that. Ever since the virus began, he's been drowning in self-hatred and regret. Even now, so long after those events, in a mostly healed world, he can't look at Espio or Whisper sometimes without that guilt eating his heart. The memories of what he put his loved ones through. But.. it was Starline's fault, wasn't it? Sonic's not fully innocent; his decisions did play a part in the virus's creation, but Starline was the mastermind behind it all.
"I guess..that's true," Sonic hesitantly agrees. He can't spend his entire life in regret. It'll kill him.
"You're one person, Sonic. You can't be held responsible for the state of the entire world all the time. Lift some of that weight from your shoulders," Shadow reminds, threading his hand through Sonic's quills. Sonic nods, a sudden wave of exhaustion crashing over him as his mind and heart finally settle down.
"'m tired," He mumbles, and his heart flutters as he hears Shadow's low chuckle.
"I'd assume so, you were thrashing around and screaming– really scared me," He informs, moving to stand. He reaches a hand out for Sonic, and the tired hedgehog takes it, stumbling up and straight onto his bed. The sheers are skewed, thrown all over and unruly.
"Screaming?" He asks, rubbing his eyes. Shadow nods, wincing,
"Screaming. You wouldn't wake up; you were trembling and fighting in your sleep." Shadow gets into the bed as well, haphazardly pulling the covers up around them and scooting close to his lover, opening his arms invitingly.
"'m sorry–" Sonic apologises, then yawns, "–That must've been freaky." He stretches, then tucks in close to Shadow. Shadow's arms wrap around his waist, pulling him close as the soft bed threatens to lull him to sleep instantly.
"Don't worry about it, I'm glad you're alright," Shadow murmurs, pressing another kiss onto the crown of Sonic's head. Sonic hums sleepily and tilts his head up instead, catching his partner's lips in a lazy kiss.
"Th'nk you f'r wakin' me," he mumbles against Shadow's lips. He feels Shadow smile more than he sees it.
"Always. Go to bed. I'll be here when you wake up. There's no virus, I promise," Shadow reassures one last time.
Sonic feels himself drifting off, but no thoughts of metal or Zombots plague his mind this time. Only Shadow– the real Shadow, warm and fluffy. Smelling of lavender and looking at Sonic with a bedhead and morning breath. He sleeps easily.