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Oliver Queen is a lot of things, but homophobic isn't one of them.
He was so happy when Connor came out he even buy him a flag, he sure as hell embarrassed Connor but he didn't care, he was happy for Roy when he (finally) came out as well but unfortunately Connor stopped him from being "embarrassing" because apparently a man can't be happy for his kids expressing themselves.
That being said, he didn't like Roy's boyfriend.
Now, it's not because of homophobia, and it's also not because he didn't particularly like Dick Grayson.
He has sure that when Roy needs someone Dick is always his first choice, and he seems to fit right with Roy, and Ollie wants Roy happy more than anything really.
But the idea.
The mere outrageous concept of being forever related to Bruce Wayne? No
Unacceptable, inconceivable, he'll eat his bow before accepting that as a concept.
So Ollie decided to take extreme measures.
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"I need your help"
Bruce was expecting a lot of things when Alfred told him he has someone over, he was expecting Dick, even Jason - maybe Lucius - hell he could have predicted Harley walking in rather than Ollie doing it.
Not that he wasn't happy to see one of his friends he just was confused as to, why.
A matter with Star City? Bruce doubted it, Ollie never asked for his help, and it couldn't be that a Gotham based rogue went there either, when Gotham's rogues breached containment and went to Start City, Ollie at best informed him but didn't want him involved, he had made it awfully clear before, and to be fair after the Jason - Mia incident he didn't blame him at all.
"Your son is dating mine" now that made Bruce pause.
He was aware of Dick's relationship with Roy, how could he not, Dick was awful at hiding his relationship, and when Dick had told him he got mad at Bruce's lack of reaction, in Bruce defense, he isn't sure what he was supposed to say.
He isn't homophobic, at least 2 of his kids were part of the community, Cass came out first less scared and less emotional, a simple 'Dad I like women' just as a warning for the next time Bruce saw her with Stephanie, the latter gave him no explanation, Bruce didn't pry in, he knew she and Tim broke up.
When Tim came out it wasn't much of a difference, Tim was a lot more nervous tho, about being bisexual and when Bruce look up what it meant he didn't even knew that was a thing, he didn't mind tho, Tim was just thankful Bruce was "taking it so well" Whatever that meant, Bruce wasn't homophobic.
And he knew Oliver Queen of all people wasn't either, so his first thought was, that this was a clone, he got replaced by a shape shifter - again - or Ollie got brainwashed - again - by waller, she looked homophobic, it didn't make sense for Ollie to be upset about that.
"Is that a problem?" Bruce felt ready to restrain Ollie and take him to the cave, not the first time he'll deal with a fake or a brainwashed Ollie, maybe this one was sent to kill him instead of Dinah, chances are low but never zero someone had it for Bruce Wayne so much they sent a childhood friend of his against him, or maybe he really was cursed and all his childhood friends turned evil, Tommy, Harvey, Lex and now Ollie.
"Not in theory," He was really struggling to follow ollie's train of thought "Look it's not homophobia, but think about it, they're taking it seriously and that means, we are gonna be related if they get married, do you really wanna share your family tree with mine for the rest of our existence?"
Oh so that was the issue, it wasn't about anything personal, even if he was he didn't mind Roy dating Dick, Roy was a lot of things, Dick clearly went to him when he had no one else to back him up, they fit right and everytime he called Dick he was happier since he and Roy moved in together.
But Ollie was right, they'll be related if their kids got married, and Dick was at the core a romantic he did want to get married, the whole deal, he had been at the altar or engaged a concerning amount of times and maybe Roy may be the official one.
"Can't say I'm delighted, but there's not much we can do Ollie, your kid has a kid of its own and Dick doesn't even live under my roof" as much anxiety as that gives him for not being able to keep his first kid from jumping into bullets out of his bleeding empathy or to cause him heart attacks after Blüdheaven blew up, doing wonders to his anxiety not knowing where he was just for him to be in New York.
"Well aren't you the world's greatest detective? Can't you figure something we can actually do?" Oliver asked making Bruce pause, getting his nose into dick's relationships assured him a screaming match at worst, and Dick going no contact with him for weeks at best.
"Like what? Cockblock them by chaperoning every date they have?"
"... Actually" Bruce should learn to shut up, or get a better tone when he's being sarcastic because apparently Ollie can't tell when he's kidding
"Ollie we aren't doing that"
"Yeah yeah they're adults I know, but I think I have an idea," Bruce suddenly feels better at his parenting decisions seeing ollie's behavior, not a high bar considering ollie's style, but he feels better "What if we make them take their siblings?"
Bruce paused for a solid minute at that, because, what?
"Look, you traumatized your kid into being mindful and planning his dates"
"I didn't traumatize-"
"Don't argue with me, you are the same it's hereditary," Oliver says making him scowl "So Dick has to plan their dates, you have 0 sense of privacy and Roy will never suspect if I start doing the same"
"I have a sense of privacy-"
"Don't even try you bug everyone you care about, I know you have one on my apartment" okay yeah well Bruce can't deny that, he doesn't check it often though, so , checkmate Ollie.
"Okay, assuming we do that, how do we convince our other kids?" Bruce asks, he isn't humoring this, at all, this is stupid, it won't work but if Ollie can stand (with different degrees of success) Bruce's OCD, he can stand Ollie going insane about this nonsense until his early dementia goes away, being a grandfather really fucked him up.
"Dunno about yours but I can just tell mine is a game" Ollie says, oh god he is doing this, couldn't Bruce just let him hanging? he either does that or snitches on Dick with this and then Dick will get mad at Bruce for humoring it....he's not winning is he?
"Alright, you can try, but all I'm saying is that all this would do is make them closer" Bruce says while Ollie just make a dismissive sign
"It won't, besides you're also going to help, you have more kids, how should we start." this is insanity, unheard levels of insanity if he accepts, and he cannot let Harvey laugh at him when he goes to Arkham later to update him.
"We are not, I'm not doing that Dick and I are in a good place right now I'm not gonna just pry into his relationship with Roy" You're taking therapy for this Bruce, be reasonable, reason with the mad man, you play chess with Harvey this is way easier.
"You're just scared because you don't have a good relationship with him" okay, now Bruce is gonna punt ollie on the face, how dates he.
"I'm not, I have a good relationship with my kids" well not all the time but human relationships aren't his strong suit.
"If you did then you would be just as concerned as I am about our kids dating, you're just standing back because you're scared to fuck up more" yep, he's kicking his friend.
"I am not, I'll show you, Roy is gonna he mad at you when he finds out but you know what, me and Dick will be fine" maybe Dinah and Babs are right and everytime he and Ollie talk is a metaphoric dick measuring contest, but he isn't gonna let Oliver queen of all people lecture him on parenting.
"We'll see" yup it was on once Ollie said that.
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Ollie lost it.
That's the only sane, logical and reasonable conclusion Mia can come up with, he lost it, his age finally caught up to him, and went into senile dementia earlier.
Because there's no way he just asked her and Cissie to chaperone Roy's next date with Dick, Mia simple refused to believe it, on top of it, the man made it seem like a game!
A game!
"Run that by me again?" She heard him wrong, that's theory number 3, below the dementia and the 'Ollie got replaced by an alien who poorly imitates father figures' he kinda wishes those were crazy insane impossible options, but it wasn't, unfortunately Ollie has been replaced or brainwashed - and they seriously need a break or therapy.
"I need either of you to make up a plan so you can go to your brother's date" no yeah, she heard him right, what the fuck?
"Yeah, no, I'm busy, Tim and the others are hanging out with the other young justice kids, no capes, and I am so not in the mood for cock blocking, ask Sienna" Cissie says, God bless her for not being related to Ollie, must be nice just being around, eating for free and hanging out, being retired and happy, meanwhile she needs to listen to Ollie for the rest of her life because she got adopted by the man.
"Mia? Kiddo? Please"
"...I'll do it if you give me your credit card to spend" this may be stupid but she isn't, if she needs to make it uncomfortable for everyone she sure as hell would take advantage
"Deal" The 0 hesitation on ollie's tone makes her almost squeak, okay, so, she needs to ask Tim for that whatever bat- item he has to check for mind control or cloning because Ollie is either going thru it or he really hates the idea of being related to Bruce Wayne that much to overcome his own morals.
That the last one was the least insane of her current options make her wanna sob dramatically because this is what her life lead up too.
Her life is lead to now hearing this conversation.
"You need to take Mia" said Ollie sealing Mia's fate, she is really doing this uh? She is going to be cock blocking Roy and Dick just because...Ollie lost it.
"What - Ollie is a date I can't take her" Yeah Roy, try to reason with the madman who decided hated your boyfriend's dad, she guesses is time to play her part because if Cissie,Connor and Sienna are next on line to do this she at least isn't loosing.
"I need to buy some products and Ollie was supposed to take me, I ran out and I really need 'em" Mia says making Roy turn to her , he seems to be considering his options and Mia really wants to tell him this is false, she in fact doesn't need those products, and if she did she can go with literally anyone to buy them any other day.
"Fine buckle up," Roy says sighting accepting the excuse and making a sign for her to follow him which she did turning back to see Ollie making her thumbs up, Lian seemed completely confused at what was Ollie on, and from the kitchen island she saw Cissie recording this insanity.
She got in the car and immediately regretted it because Dick was already there
"Oh- hey Mia, is everything okay?" Dick asks and Mia wishes the earth would swallow her, she is so never never ever listening to Ollie ever again
"Yup, I just need to buy some stuff and you guys are going to the mall anyway, Ollie said I could come" the lie sounds so easy, she is so winning whatever Ollie is giving at the end of this game, she's already in too deep and lying is kinda fun.
"Oh- alright then," Dick says while Roy got into the car and started to drive "Hope you don't mind the date"
"Just don't make out too much"
"You're making too many demands for someone I could just drop it the road" Roy jokes he doesn't really sound annoyed or mad.
"You'll drop your little sister off the road alone with men roaming the street?" Mia asked with fake hurt while Roy groaned
"No, but next time tell Connor to drive you" Roy says.
"He doesn't know how to drive"
"How did he get in the JLA before we did if he can't even drive?" Dick asks almost a mutter making Roy actually laugh.
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At the end the date wasn't completely horrible, sure Dick and Roy are disgustingly in Love and she felt quite lonely, but Cissie thankfully told the rest of the teen titans, and Tim and the others send support funny texts to keep her busy.
She bought at least 4 new bra's, some skin care she always eyed on the store but didn't wanna waster her allowance on, and she took some books that seemed interesting for her room in titans tower where she can actually read and chill, some dresses she thought will look neat and some candy for later.
Roy and Dick didn't mind her that much, Dick was offering her food and Roy even tell her to try a new ice cream flavor, she should listen to Roy more often because it was a 10 out of 10.
Once she got back Lian and Ollie were trying to make a pie, presumably for Dinah if the heart shaped disaster had a say, and it was clearly Lian's idea since Ollie looked about as lost as a kid without his mom in a mall.
Dick ended up staying over for dinner, chatting with everyone, so overall a solid day, she just hopes she wins whatever game Ollie is playing, maybe also win over Tim just to rub it in
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Her dad is petty to a fault.
Don't get Cass wrong she loves Bruce, but getting into this insanity just to prove Oliver queen something is, dumb.
What is he proving? That he isn't scared is Cass best guest, apparently they both did a plan to cock block dick's relationship with Roy, why? Because they don't wanna be related to each other, she knew Bruce didn't want to at first but apparently Oliver had said something wrong and now Bruce needed to be petty right back.
Now she and her family are roped into a contest, whoever sabotages more dates wins, Oliver apparently already had an advantage after sabotaging a date in the mall, now it was Bruce's turn while Lian stayed over at the manor while Dick took Roy on for a cinema date on an R- rated movie.
How does she know? Because she was asked to chaperone this date, she is now sitting next to them in the cinema watching a movie she can't care less about whole Dick and Roy are cuddling while Roy jumps every 6 minutes and Dick keeps complaining about the police in the movie being completely useless.
She should leave but to be completely fair being competitive runs in the family, because she is not loosing to any of Oliver queen's kids, she can rub it to Connor later, she won over him in being a younger sibling.
She discover really quickly she was gaining a lot of points, because the movie room was mostly empty and the moment she returned from the bathroom she found Dick and Roy mostly tangled in each other than paying attention to whatever the movie was doing, they didn't notice her at all until she sat down and Dick finally felt someone watching.
Will she get extra points due to Roy's terrified scream at her suddenly "reappearing"? She'll need to check the jury.
The jury being Ollie and Bruce having "secret" meetings in the early morning, because all of ollie's family hating being up early, and Bruce only had duke to worry about at that hour, and Duke almost fought her today to come to the date, why? Because he wanted to win over the others.
They ended up teaming up, Her and Duke will crush the others, Tim is by himself in cock blocking and he is too cocky, Stephanie immediately called dibs on Damian, Jason is by himself because he refused to team up with them, and Duke and her were the killer team, nobody would win over them.
If it wasn't because of a robbery down in 4th duke will be the one here but unfortunately the day shift is his and she needed to be alone until the end of the movie.
"I mean the movie was okay - I still think the worst we've seen was that night at the tower" Roy says still munching some popcorn
"The one where you screamed loud enough for Atlantis to hear you?" Dick asked earning himself a punch in the shoulder.
"Shut up that was made by an actual demon! We went to hell and everything" Roy says chuckling and sighting "Man Lian was like 5 back then time flies"
"Wally and Garth were still childless too" Dick says making Roy actually let out a whistle before kissing dick's cheek "We've been way too long together"
"Absolutely" Dick says turning to Roy smirking slightly to try and steal another kiss, Cass decided to use the power Bruce gave her, state intensely until they feel your presence, and it worked, Dick was trained to feel eyes on him so he turned to Cass immediately and stopped the PDA.
"Right, hey Cassie, why did you wanted to come here anyway?" Roy asks while Cass shrugs
"I wanted to be with my older brother, we barely spend time together since he started his new family with you" the best part of having Tim and Damian as siblings, learning emotional manipulation, but in an innocent way, the way that made Dick pause and look slightly guilty while Roy grimaced.
"I uh- I could stay over for dinner? We could watch a movie Cass that's less gory" and she got him, Dick immediately folded when it came to them
"Sure, just us?" Cass asks while Roy decides the floor is the most interesting part
"I'm uh- Roy can take Lian into a father daughter date right Roy?" Dick says while Roy immediately nods almost to avoid making Cass sad, she needed to thank Duke on teaching her how to make puppy eyes.
"Yeah! Totally no problem!" Roy added and Cass wished she could smile like she wanted too, but instead she just gave a sweet smile and took dick by the wrist dragging him back.
Duke joined them in their way back, mostly keeping dick's attention by constant chatter making Roy s side line, and dragging dick into s marathon, Cass made sure to count the hours, it lasted up until 12, they even got to skip patrol.
By next day Dick was already in his way back to New York after having not sleep or spend the night with Roy or the day alone with him, that's when she and duke went to the cave with Bruce to count how many points they got in comparison.
Mia had gotten 7 points, 3 for chaperoning, 4 for not letting them be in their little bubble and a little extra for not leaving them alone.
Cass and duke however? They got 10, 3 were given for chaperoning, 3 for the cinema room being alone and scaring the couple and also stopped them from kissing the whole time, and 4 to duke for forcing dick to stay for family dinner and movie night away from Roy.
Duke and her made their team up official so now she and Duke will share points while Steph and Damian shared theirs, Tim decided he could handle himself alone and Jason decided to not comment just observe the board and by the body language Cass could tell he was wondering if they all had gone insane.
And maybe a little , Cass and duke were way too excited about this and Steph and Damian looked like gremlins, but it was worthy.
She and Duke are so so winning this.
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Cassandra Cain Wayne is absolute NOT winning over Connor on this dumb competition their fathers made.
Connor is dead set on that, she's not winning, who cares if she gets 10 points first try? So what, he'll get 13 just to rub it in, he didn't wanna be involved in this at first, he is better than this, he knows better than this, he's immune to most provocations, but not all, and getting a "sucks to suck" from Cassandra Wayne, after she and duke Thomas rub in their 10 points first try is one he can't resist, so here he is, plotting.
He and Roy don't have that much of an age gap he can't be a cute little manipulator like Cass and her siblings can, and he also doesn't have that much in common with Roy to chatter for hours and take his attention like apparently Duke Thomas does, but he has his ways.
What ways are those? Guilt tripping.
See, the magic thing about not being raised by Ollie is that he feels guilty about it, it's not a secret, and it's something Roy knows, and Roy truly tried his best to be his sibling, but they were honestly not that far apart in age, and he was already green arrow by then so, kinda hard to be all warm and fuzzy while both of them being the older siblings.
Still, they have managed, Roy is his brother and he is Roy's, even if they're not far in age, and it's fun now that they understand each other more sometimes they have boy nights together and they're 100 times better since Roy settled down with Dick and doesn't got to dance clubs anymore, now they get to do actually fun stuff in Connor's opinion, and even try places that have food for both of them, or sometimes on Roy's cue, annoy Ollie, just a little, not like he minds, Connor can tell Ollie loves seeing them get along.
It stings sometimes that Connor didn't get this sooner, he would have loved to grew up with Roy when they were both kids, Ollie always took Roy places If the old pictures in the attic have anything to say about it, and that's where Connor's plan forms.
The rules for the competition were set after Cass and Mia had different degrees of success, Ollie and Bruce were not allowed to help them with their plans in an obvious way.
Meaning Bruce can't no longer order Dick to take Cass and Duke, and Ollie couldn't order Roy to take Mia, why? Because it'll be way too suspicious, Dick was a good detective and while twice is a coincidence, thrice is a pattern.
So they needed to get creative, luckily, Connor was creative, and this pictures were the perfect leverage, what better way to keep a couple apart than family vacation?.
"Say, dad, how come we've never go to the water park or just something chill? Not like the city doesn't have them" and so he begins the evil machinations of his plan, he dug some old photo albums with the excuse of cleaning the attic for a spring deep cleaning, and was now showing some pics in the table during breakfast, one of them, being the water park one he was holding while Roy looked mortified at pictures of his teenage self.
"What? No! We've been to the water park right?" Roy asks genuinely confused "wait no- Ollie and I have been, did he really never took you or Mia?"
"I have no memory of a water park, did he really take you?" Mia asks while Roy nods, he feels a bit bad by how guilty their dad looks mixing the breakfast like he just committed a crime or worse.
"Yeah when I was like 15 or something, it was fun, we should go" Roy says taking the pic gently from Connor and smiling at it.
"Yup! We should - in fact we are going" that's when Ollie cut in agreeing immediately and Connor internally chuckled at him being served first probably out of ollie's guilt.
"So like- who else is coming? Cissie and sienna are a duh but who else?" Mia asks
"Are we counting Hal as family?" Connor says while Roy makes a 50/50
"Most likely yeah but if Hal comes over so should Dick right?" Roy says and Connor can finally move the next piece
"Oh yeah but Hal is off planet, and we all know he'll whine if we invite Dick but not him" Connor says and Roy just hums agreeing
"I'm sure Roy can survive a week without his boyfriend around" Emiko says finally joining the conversation while serving herself juice
"Yeah sure, we are not glued together guys I can be without him for a family trip, I came all the way here just to help with spring cleaning" Roy says rolling his eyes at her "also can you pass me the juice?"
"Sure thing Roy, then it's settled" Connor says handing him a box they had in the table "a whole week of just us, should we leave our phones? That way we can make a more genuine connection"
"Amazing idea, that way none of you can ignore us in the car while we sing cheesy songs" Dinah says while Mia and Emiko actively groan, a necessary evil in Connor's plan but unfortunate none the less
"But that also means Connor will give us Buddhist sayings and get us to open up" Mia reminds
"God forbid Ollie actually opens up- hey!" Roy says before getting his hair messed up by Ollie
"We'll live thru it and if we survive 7 days with each other we'll be a better family" Ollie says finally sitting down to eat his breakfast
"Or we all end up hating each other" Lian comments bitting down her food while Roy snorts a little
But at the end it was settled, they were leaving and Roy wouldn't be able to talk to Dick for 7 days, by the end of the day he told Ollie about his plan actually making Ollie pause and hug him by the side in pride, he didn't even suspect it was a plan.
When they went down to count points he ended up with 16 because of the day length he managed to archive.
And he obviously did the mature thing.
Take a picture and send it to the group chat to rub it in, better luck next time Cass and Duke, Connor is winning and nobody is taking his position for at least an entire week.
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In no world he inhabits is Tim loosing to Connor Hawke of all people, If he thinks he can make a good plan, Tim will show him a good plan.
An entire week of Dick being in the manor lamenting about his boyfriend going to war (he wasn't) And about being a waiting wife (he so wasn't)
And the worst part if you ask Tim is that he can't even tell him to go somewhere else since blüdheaven fucking exploded and New York wasn't half as messy as Gotham ever was so even if dick stayed he's not sure he could entertain himself a lot, but whatever fine, once the week was over Dick was back with Roy and nobody got a hold of them in 18 hours, Tim doesn't even wanna ask why.
But Connor was way too smug about his plan in the group chat he made so nobody interrupt each other's plans.
And Tim ain't letting him win, the only problem being, it's just him on this plan, because both Cass and Steph decided to be traitors and choose Tim's other siblings, and there's no way Jason and him are teaming up, for starters Jason didn't wanna be here and for seconds, Tim has Helena and Jean-Paul Valley.
"Why are we doing this again?" helena asked him, they were in the clock tower, Barbara let him stay since she decided to not participate but offer him a base
"Bruce and Ollie got into a fight and rope us all in" Tim says
"That seems severely stupid" Jean says and yeah, it is extremely stupid, unfortunately both families were competitive at this point it's hard to remember the original point, Tim doesn't even care he looses against his siblings he just doesn't want the arrow kids win.
"Who won points over you? You never cared this much when Dick was dating - literally anyone" Helena says
"Connor, and I'm not letting him win, who does he think he is?" Tim says "So here's the plan, when on patrol later i'm gonna fake being hurt, Jean-Paul you're helping me fake bandages and then I'm gilt tripping Dick into taking care of poor ol' me"
"I don't wanna hurt you" Jean-Paul says while Tim just sights
"No, you're not gonna hurt me, you're just gonna patch me up pretending I'm hurt" Tim says and this time Jean Paul nods
"And what's my part on all this?" Helena asks confused
"You distract Dick until I give the signal" Tim says "how much points you think I'm getting Babs?"
"More than Dinah and the others that's for sure, they have no plan for the foreseeable future, once you give the signal I'll tell them you're executing yours" Babs says and high fives him, yeah this is exactly why he doesn't need Jason, he has Barbara and that already secures you a win, even if she's said "she's not participating"
"Babs I thought you weren't gonna get involved and that this was childish" Helena says
"And it is, but Dinah says her kids win and I bet on Cass and Tim, we'll see who's better and I can assure you, it's gonna me Cass and Tim" Babs says and Tim preens a little smirking, he can always count in babs to cheer him up.
"What's the final objective of all this competition? Do we win something" Jean Paul asks and Tim actually, doesn't know, he assumes is for Dick and Roy to break up? But their plans don't seem to be doing that, none of them want to hurt their respective sibling, Bruce doesn't even wanna be here and god knows that Ollie entered dementia with this according to Mia.
But even with that Tim isn't sure, guess just annoying Dick and Roy will do? Or at least in Mia's words, until Ollie accepts he and Bruce will be related and he can't stop that, but meh not his problem if Roy becomes his future Brother in law his only real concern is for Damian who is barely older than Lian and will now be her uncle modern family style.
"I think it's just annoying dick as much as possible" Tim says shrugging while jean Paul hums considering it
"You make a compelling argument" jean Paul says while helena full on cackles
"Alright shorty, let's get our plan started I'll go with Nightwing you and JP get in position" Helena says as she went to the window to leave the clocktower and Barbara started typing the message to the group chat.
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As always Tim's plan was flawless, or well mostly.
The signal was executed, he has his head being wrap up and fake blood running, or well he hopes is fake he just asked jean Paul to get him blood and prayed for the best.
The point is, it was all going well until dick arrived, worried and rushed towards him immediately almost pushing Azrael off the way to hold him himself.
"What happened to him?" Dick asks now bringing Tim close and checking his eyes
"He fell and hit his head, it wasn't high he should be concussed" Azrael says while Dick let's a shuddering breath, Tim looks to the side seeing Helena making a 'what the fuck' universal sign to Jean Paul who Is lucky his face is covered by a mask
Truth be told Tim didn't plan what injury he had really well, but our of all things, Jean Paul said "falling" as if that wasn't dick's trauma! As if that wasn't something that already happened once during a not so good moment of Tim's life.
He didn't mean to weaponize dick's trauma, just his own injury, but now it's too late, Dick's grip is desperate on his sleeves and immediately starts making calculations.
Tim faked passing out just so he wouldn't have to look at that any longer, probably wrong move since Dick squeaked and next thing he knew he was being carried, he always forgot how strong his brother was when worried, he kept his eyes closed and just heard Dick half yell at Bruce to drive the "stupid car faster" but everyone could tell he wasn't mad, he was scared.
Next time Tim opened his eyes he was in the med bay being kept company by Dick who explained to him he was concussed but no further brain damage, he said it with such relief Tim felt a little guilty about his plan.
But not really enough.
"You're staying with me right?" Tim asks catching dick's wrist, and this is maybe a little embarrassing, he's an adult now, not the teen who looked up at Dick like he hung up stars, but Dick was still his brother and he could still manipulate him
"...Yeah of course buddy, let me just make a call okay? I told Roy I'll be back he'll be worried if I don't" Dick says ruffling his hair and leaving the med bay to get his phone while Bruce walked in
"You have nothing" Bruce declared
"I do not"
"You lied to your brother"
"I did"
"How long are you planning on keeping him?"
"How long are you gonna bench me for a concussion?"
"A week"
"Then a whole week"
"I'll tell Ollie, next time say you got punched into the wall, not that you fell off" Bruce says and Tim nods, yeah agreed that was a better story and less traumatizing
"Got it, noted, anything else?" Tim says
"Don't go too much on him we don't want him to be hurt, and I don't want you doing this kind of plans again" Bruce says before leaving, in a couple minutes Dick was back and telling Tim he'll stay the whole week with him.
The next morning he for a text from the group chat and from Connor informing him of his score.
20 points said the main chat
And a text from Connor calling him sore looser.
Totally worth it.
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Emiko wasn't a looser, she wasn't gonna be a looser, no matter how many points the bat clan seemed to get, she'll get more time and less communication, so what if Tim Drake got a whole week of Dick Grayson being home all the time with them barely talking to Roy, she could so that too!! And better infact.
So she made a plan with Cissie and Sienna, they were gonna win the competition, or at least she was since sienna and Cissie were not related to the family and she'll be the one getting the points but they were a team so it wasn't just her!.
Her plan was actually currently in motion, deep into the forest where she insisted they'll have a good time, sienna and Cissie had enough supplies to survive a week in the wild each, now she just needed to get them lost.
"Are you sure we can still return to the path?" Roy asked, Connor and Mia were behind them, it was supposed to just be a scout in the forest that Emiko swore up and down she knew like her palm.
She infact did not new where they were, not the slightest clue, she didn't even told Ollie where they were going, let alone Dinah.
Lian was the only one of them who stayed with Ollie and Dinah to go shopping since she wanted to surprise her dad, she did feel a bit guilty for the 2 weeks of pain she was about to cause but if Tim Drake got 20 points for trauma, she was gonna at least 7 times more for this.
They kept walking until it turned dark and that's where Roy started to worry
"Emiko, if you don't know where we are nobody is gonna get mad but it's getting dark" Roy says going forward and shaking her a little
"...we are lost" she says simply while Connor squeaks and Mia curses while both Cissie and sienna look around trying to see the path, or someone else.
"Shit- anyone's phone got signal? And battery?" Roy says immediately trying to asses the situation
"No signal" Mia says while Cissie shakes her head too
"Mine died" Connor says and groans
"Alright, Mia, Cissie turn them off to save battery we need to get to high ground and stay close" Roy says and starts guiding them while Connor starts pulling the matches from his pocket.
"Find dry leaves everyone, or sticks" Connor says and she did looked down getting some dry leaves along with Cissie and Sienna, Mia on her end was tracing a path with Roy with their fingers trying to see a place they can climb too or sleep in.
This was gonna be fun time, she hoped.
_____________________________________________________
Those were not fun 12 days, Emiko counted them.
They were alive so it wasn't like they died or anything, Connor got to keep all the granola bars and the rest of them hunted birds, by day 4 they had managed to call Ollie for half a minute to tell him they were lost.
They just forgot to tell him, where.
So it took another 4 days before signal reached them and they frantically yelled "the forest! The forest!"
One will think Ollie would track then from there, but no apparently "the forest" was too wide of a term, so they needed to wait another 2 days to say the name of the stupid forest
Then it took a whole day of organizing the search and another to find them because Superman wasn't on the planet and neither was Hal or any of the lanterns.
It was actually Martian manhunter who found them, thanks to Connor who started meditating and got his thoughts followed by the Martian until they found them.
Ollie was basically sobbing while hugging Connor, Roy, Mia and her for a good 5 minutes before letting go.
Cissie and Mia were greeted by their young justice/ teen titans friends frantically asking them if they were alright, if they felt sick or cold.
Roy got greeted by the titans once Ollie let him go, but most importantly, Lian immediately hugging him while Roy cried and kissed her hair on relief and Dick immediately went to kiss him and ask how he felt and if he needed anything, just for Roy to get immediately swallowed by the other 3 titans In the search site, Donna, Garth and Wally.
Connor and her stayed in ollie's arms until wally hugged Connor saying he was glad he was alright and told him Kyle was calling sobbing.
It took her a whole other day to finally tell Ollie that was her plan along with Cissie and Sienna's.
"Emiko- what were you thinking? You had any idea how worried I was for all of you? Don't - don't do that! This is- too much"
"I want to win" she says
"Yeah okay alright you probably won forever, my god, just let me recover but we are having a discussion about the rules okay?"
"Alright"
"Jesus Christ" Ollie said leaning in the nearest counter while she smiled, at least she won and the days weren't awful so it's still a win in her books.
____________________________________________________________
Damian had been planning the perfect flawless plan to keep Grayson for a month home and win the challenge, Stephanie was as always his perfect partner in this type of plans, that's why she was his Batgirl.
She had hold them back thinking it was too cruel and mean to do this, but after Emiko Queen decided to lost herself and the other arrows in the forest, nothing was off the table anymore.
"You want me to what?" So maybe their plan involved Damian's father to some level, but that wasn't against the rules, they checked, they could still do that.
"Fake having a broken leg, or arm or neck" Stephanie lists, they're giving him options
"Yeah okay, I got that but how will they get dick to stay?" Bruce asked looking confused at them
"Jean Paul Valley is out of the country, Jason is in fucks know where and Tim is with the teen titans until next weekend" Steph explained
"Thomas is on finals, Cass is with the birds of prey, Steph and I can't be batman, if you get "hurt" for a month Richard will be forced to stay to be batman for that period of time, by the time the others come back he'll already be compromised for it and won't leave" Damian explains briefly and proudly, he thought this through really well along with Stephanie.
"How will that even stop his relationship he and Roy can just move in here while Dick is Batman" Typical of Damian's father to ask that, fortunately he thought this through
"Simply, we are extremely annoying, we won't let him have peace and we'll walk in everytime he tries to do anything but sleep if Roy ends up being here" Stephanie says while Damian nods
"He won't think much of it because it is likely we become this annoying at having him as our Batman again" Damian says proudly
"You just need to pretend to break a leg or maybe an arm - or have one of those neck collars, something that stops you from batman but also doesn't completely traumatize him" Steph explained and this is why Damian teamed up with her, he doesn't care who she is dating being drake or Cassandra, she is his big sister and she is brilliant.
"Ollie is already thinking of pulling off this whole thing so I'm not sure" Bruce says while Damian smirks, oh yeah, he thought about that too, not happening.
"Why must we oblige by queen's weakness? He started this competition and now he's "chickening out", I don't think that's acceptable, he just knows we'll crush him next time and doesn't wanna deal with it, we'll have the last laugh if we do this" Damian says, he knows his dad is competitive, he can't really help it, if Oliver Queen pulled out, that means they'll have the last point and the last laugh out of this insanity.
"... Alright" Father finally said making Stephanie immediately celebrate while Damian grinned, he is not loosing to emiko queen, and he and Stephanie are gonna be the best at this competition.
_________________________________________________________
The plan went well, they needed to pull Bruce off a simple case so he could pretend the injury and leave it to Dick, it was hard with Bruce's ocd but Damian and Steph are nothing but persistent.
After that Steph strapped a fake cervical collar on Bruce, put a plaster in one of his legs and lay him down on the med bay, then they called Dick.
"Heya big bird" Steph says she has Damian basically jumping up and down in excitement out of the frame of the bat computer camera "So uh- good news and bad news"
"Are you all alright?" Dick asks immediately shifting, he seems to be having dinner he was picking some pasta up before talking.
"Yeah, Dami and I are fine, Bruce ran into something tho, he's hurt, like not badly but he did broke his leg and needs a collar" Steph says, who said she's not a good actress, she's doing amazing at being fake concerned.
"Shit, you need help strapping him down?" Dick asks while Steph shakes her head
"No, he accepted to rest we dealt with that battle already, it's just he left the case open and me and Damian wanted to go end it" Steph says
"Let me guess, without him you're not?" Dick asks already sighting
"How'd you guess?," she asks before chuckling "Dami and I were wondering if we could get your help with it, also maybe cover for Bruce?"
"I can help the weekend but you know I don't wanna be Batman again, is Jean Paul not there?" Dick asks while Damian finally schooled himself to walk in
"Azrael is out of the country for an indefinite amount of time, he does however send us a picture of a pigeon" Damian says making Dick laugh being caught off guard before returning to focus.
"Alright, Cass then? She's an amazing Batman" Dick says leaning into his palm while his elbow is in the table, he's eating more lazily trying to act calm but he's not she can see the gears in his head.
"Cass is out too, birds of prey business" Steph says and fake tears, she does miss her girlfriend sue her.
"Can't believe I'm saying this," dick mutters and a chuckle is head behind him, presumably Roy's "Jason? Like I don't want him to be but he's getting less trigger happy"
"Todd is nowhere to be found, he's doing something nobody knows what" Damian says shrugging, yeah the least they know about Jason the better she fears.
"Tim? Like he needs some filling but he can manage" Dick says and at that point he sounds desperate, Tim and Bruce don't share a body build, given neither do Cass and Bruce but Cass has aura.
"Teen titans mission, he and the others are off planet" Damian says and Dick just leans back in the chair to mutter a curse
"Duke? I'll do his homework if he takes it" Dick asks and basically begs just a little.
"Finals week, he's not even aware enough we fear" Steph laments and it's not completely untrue, poor Duke last time she saw him he was pacing the kitchen reciting things.
"And you're not taking it and Damian's too small" Dick says and Damian does 'hey!' At being called small, Steph just nods while Dick looks conflicted before looking at the side, again probably seeing Roy or a sign he was making him.
"How long did Leslie gave Bruce?" Dick asks turning back tapping his fingers into the table over and over and over like an anxiety rhythm.
"Whole month" Steph says and Dick just covers his face with his palms and rubbed his eyes a bit
"Are you sure nobody else can? Kate?" Dick asks and looks about ready to give up and already tired before he even put the cowl on.
"Outsiders mission, she send us a sunset to know she was alive but that's all" Steph says while some freckled hands appeared on Dick's shoulder's while he was in the call before he looked up at Roy, the look of genuine love Dick shoot to Roy made Steph feel a little bit guilty about the plan, but she'll be dammed if she doesn't get herself and Damian points after reading Mia brag hers.
"Alright, Roy is gonna come with me and tell Bruce it's not negotiable, he's also gonna get me pestering him like he does when I'm injured" if you asked Steph that's probably a win to Bruce since he's not actually in any pain, this is just a vacation with his eldest being over all the time.
"How're you gonna manage Lian's school?" Damian asks and it's probably to get Roy to stay out of the manor, or because he and Lian are always in constant competition to be dick's favorite and so far, none of them are loosing.
"I can take online and I'll be in your room all the time you're out in your boring building of a school" Lian says from behind the camera almost yelling it before showing in camera to stick her tongue at Damian, getting Damian to do the same to her and Dick actually laugh, Steph sometimes forgets Damian is after all, just 12 and still enjoys childish things.
"We'll be there tomorrow" Dick says "Tell Bruce to lay down, seriously, love you guys bye" Dick says before hanging the call.
"...We are winning this" Steph says while Damian nods eagerly.
____________________________________________________________
Bruce has been chewing walls this past 2 weeks, not literally but he's close to It, so close to it.
He's bored, Lucius wasn't informed of the fake ness of his injury so now he has minimal work until his neck is better, even if his neck it's not hurt, at all.
Dick took over Batman so he can't even do that, he's allowed to read cases at least so he can solve some dead ends but he relies on Dick to execute them, and while he does, Bruce is still gonna start learning to climb walls out of pure stubbornness.
He's sure he called everyone in the JLA at this point to have fun, he invited Arthur to talk, he invited Barry so he could show him whatever movie he wanted, he invited Diana for brunch, he invited Clark to see whatever game the metropolis giants were having, he invited j'onn just to play Scrabble, he called Hal just to have someone to talk too, he called Dinah over just to see whatever series he'll promise he'll watch and forgot to do it, he's close to just invite Lois lane over to get whatever she's working on to have his mind on something, he called Zatanna in to see one of her shows from video call, the only person he hasn't invited is Oliver and it's just because he could sabotage the plan and he's not having it.
And he's happy to be able to talk to them, truly he is, he's just bored, he's also happy to spend time with his kids, but it's also getting him to start chewing concrete because it's a good distraction, if you ignore how bored he is otherwise.
He's sure he just watched 9 hours of crime documentaries with Tim to see which one of them can solve it faster, he watched every trilogy, prequel, sequel, duo-logy and more of everything Duke says he's missing out on, he's watched genuinely 18 hours of gameplay from Damian and Lian Harper playing videogames he knows nothing about, he's heard over half of the warrior cats saga by Cass's narration and Jason has already used him as testing subject of who knows how many baking stress situations he got in that Bruce wasn't allowed to ask about.
Even the non official family is getting time because Bruce has genuinely nothing else to do, Jim and him have been playing online Scrabble too during Jim's breaks, Barbara and him are way way too deep into a series about fish tanks for this past 2 weeks, Stephanie drags him into hours of skin care routines.
And also, Roy Harper who decided to bond with him, for some ungodly reason, so now he's also seen hours of horror movies.
all of this, Dick is acting like he's in his lasts moments, he brings him food, they talk, even if they go to uncomfortable conversations, dick tells him about missions he never told him about just because he can, he makes sure he drinks water, and he changed the bandage of the fake broken leg he supposedly has, all this with the most almost teary expression ever,.
Its mostly and probably due to Dick only being able to sleep with Roy, every other time he tries to talk to him, Stephanie and Damian materialize to stop it, other times it's just bad timing but Dick is a little too tired to care, while being Batman Dick is apparently only able to sleep well either with him or with Roy, Bruce doesn't complain about having Dick take naps on his bed for a couple hours tho.
Bruce is sure he's only seen Alfred a couple times this last 2 weeks because Dick basically absorbed Alfred's duties, and when Alfred does see him Bruce is mostly trying to get a conversation to not go insane.
He has 2 weeks left before he can take everything off while Dick is patrolling so he doesn't have to call Leslie in to expose his lie or an injury.
Bruce isn't sure he's not going to go insane in this 2 weeks left, he isn't sure Dick is not gonna go insane as well but right now he's stuck watching Duke and Damian compete in Mario kart while he watches, he does have a remote but he's sure he's not gonna win anyways but he still tried.
He just hopes he can do something else after this because its just Sunday and its barely 10 am, he can't sleep all the days he's sure he's never rested more in his life except for maybe when he was a baby.
___________________________________________________________
The month well surprisingly well if you asked Steph, If you asked Bruce? He's never been more happy to get into the bat suit and out of the manor, and Dick? He's off patrol, Damian needed to be sacrificed to take Lian out to the movies so Roy and Dick could stay in to cuddle since Dick needed it.
The rest of them? In the cave counting points over call with the other arrows.
"It shouldn't count as high points! They still interacted" Connor argued while Cass just rolled her eyes leaning in the desk.
"But they didn't get time to themselves, not even once everytime Steph and Damian got in" Duke argued getting Tim and Cass to back him up
"Alright fine, but still should be less than what a full month without talking could get" Emiko says getting immediately back up by Connor and Mia.
"How about long term? Dick is gonna need to take time off to just be, Roy and him are not going on dates until he's back to stable" Tim argues back moving his hand to empathize.
"Counter argument, they're cuddling so the plan just made them clingier sooo" Mia says while Tim just scoffed at ver
"Oh now we care about how they get? Then take points off Connor! He made them go M.I.A for hours so they could fuck" Duke says and Steph agreed, if they get less then so does everyone.
"You're just mad you can't keep Roy for a month and we could keep Dick" Steph says getting Mia to fake gasp and Connor turn to them like they grew 2 heads each
"Oh you wanna bet Blondie? I'll get us lost in a desert island if I need too" Connor says and oh it's on, Steph can get worse, she and Damian can make more plans hell she'll unionize with Tim if she needed too.
"That's against the rules genius, thank your aunt over there" Tim says and actually laughed while Emiko just flipped them off.
"It was against the rules to fake an injury you brilliant detective" Mia says to Tim pointing at him.
"Objection, we couldn't fake an injury the rules never said anything about Bruce and Ollie being injured it just say they couldn't be obvious helping" Stephanie says while Mia grumbled
"Oh and being fake bed ridden for a month isn't obvious helping??" Connor asked now arms crossed
"He didn't tell Dick to take the place that was me and Damian, we are at least deserving 25 points" Stephanie says arms on her hips
"I'll show you 25 points-" Mia says before they got cut in by Ollie walking behind them with Dinah, Ollie looks completely confused while Dinah is just vaguely amused by this.
"...God please tell me you guys aren't arguing about the points" Ollie says while Dinah walks behind him, laughing, audibly
"We are, they cheated" Mia says both arms extended towards them.
"It's not cheating, the rules are made to find loopholes" Cass says and Steph high fives her, that's why she loves her.
"Oh my god, where is Bruce?" Oliver asked into the screen looking between them like Bruce would materialize if he squinted hard enough.
"Out patrolling, he gave us 25 and we are discussing if it should be up and down" Stephanie says while Ollie groans throwing his head back.
"This was your idea" Emiko reminds while Ollie just side glances her shaking his head.
"Alright that's it, I'm gonna call Bruce and I'm gonna call this off, Dinah! Try and get me oracle!" Oliver says before leaving the room and the other 3 arrows inside.
"Wait if we are calling it off which family got more points?" Duke asks and immediately got Tim and Connor scrambling to get a board like speedsters.
Steph looked sideways to the cave entry to find Jason who looked genuinely fucking disturbed by them.
"You got any points we should know about?" Steph asks while Jason just turns to her, squints his eyes and turns back to the screen
"You're all fuckin' insane that's what you're all are," Jason says waving his arms in disbelief at the screen "this whole thing is fucking stupid"
"Like your face now shut up and let us count" Duke says without turning around while Jason turns to him actually offended
"Alrigh' you know what? Fuck your little game, I'm telling Dick" Jason says starring to walk like a man on a mission towards the exit of the cave.
"I wouldn't recommend going to their room right now if I was you" Cass warns and Jason actually stops, has a full body shiver, gags and flips them off
"I'm outta here" Jason says while he gets into his bike to leave
He wasn't actually gonna tell dick, was he?
____________________________________________________________
For the last 2 or 4 months, Jason has been subjected to the decline of his family's IQ, the stupid game they made and that they try to rope him in, it's ending today.
He know Ollie and Bruce called it off 2 weeks ago, but that's not enough, Dick and Roy are gonna find out even if he needs to go to New York himself to get them, and that's where he currently is, in the fire escape of dick's apartment building.
"You got everything?" Roy asked while Dick just nodded putting up his gears in his arms and legs
"Yup, all ready, I'm just gonna go patrol with Jason, I'll be fine" Dick says while Roy just nods and they have a small kiss goodbye, if you ask Jason? Disgusting, not even because they're gay, but because he hates mushy couples.
"Let's get out already Dick, I'm regretting saying I wanna spend time with ya' c'mon" Jason hurried while Dick just got to the fire escape with him before swinging up to the nearest roof, finally, they're moving.
He didn't know New York all that well, he's been there, he's patrol it, but it's not super fresh on his memory, so he's just following Dick and covering some corners he finds.
"So any particular reason you wanna spend time with me? Or did you and Bruce fight or sum?" Dick asks and Jason just wants to genuinely die again, how do you explain the game you've been seeing for the last couple months without seeing deranged yourself for not saying it sooner?
"So, there's actually something that like I think involves the whole family in a way" Jason says mostly using his hand to express himself circling it to his side
"Oh- Kay? Was it like something for Bruce he can't know about?" Dick asks and Jason shakes his head, no no, Bruce was well aware of it, he's one of the founders
"No it's uh," yeah now how does he describe it? It's been stupid after stupid "like a competition?"
"A competition between us?" Dick asks and Jason nods "For? Like what do we win or what?"
"We won nothing, it was like between us and the arrow kids" Jason says
"Pause, rewind, what?" Dick asks confused "So like, Roy's family and ours are now competing? Wait won? So it already happen? Why did nobody told me?"
They kinda didn't want you finding out" Jason says before he hears an alarm in the store below, Dick immediately swinging himself down for it while Jason followed behind landing next to him.
So, turns out New York fucking sucks, not as much as Gotham, but it still, sucks.
There's a cult robing a store, or Jason thinks it's a cult they're all wearing the same thing and pointing at them, so Jason points back while Dick raises his arms to try and dialogue with them.
But Jason isn't as naive, he knows he can't reason with the stupid, he just tried this last couple months and even Barbara joined the insanity and apparently won 200 dollars??, so Jason doesn't lower his weapon and he sees one of the cultist doesn't either, not really, he still has the weapon pointed it's just not up, it can be a worse shot but still an effective one.
And effective it is, when Dick is trying to talk then down to put down the things so they don't need to fight, the leader of the group shoots him, Jason does the obvious, and he shoots back, the other cultist scramble to their leader or run out the store in panic at the prospect of real gunshots, rookie criminals if Jason guesses right but he doesn't have a lot of time to dwell on it.
Jason doesn't have time for anything actually, he's more worried over Dick, in the floor groaning because of the gunshot wound and bleeding, a lot.
"Shit- Dickiebird you're all good?" Jason asks kneeling down, he's already hearing the police alarms and be knows they need to get our, ASAP.
"I'm still conscious, you got anything for the wound?" At least dick can talk, so Jason moves to his belt getting some bandages to press into the wound and stop the bleeding.
"Hospital" Dick croaks slightly while Jason nods cradling him like a potato sack and getting out of the store to take Dick anywhere but here, change him out of uniform and drag his ass to the hospital, while also praying Dick doesn't loose too much blood during the whole time he needs to cover their identity up.
He can't even have a normal conversation with his brother, can he?
_____________________________________________________________
Dick got shot, now normally Ollie wouldn't worry or get much news about it, this time however the kid needed surgery apparently, and Roy was worried, he called him worried at least.
So here was now Ollie with his family in the hospital, Cissie and sienna send a get well soon card but they didn't come, Mia and Connor were ahead of him when they got to the room Dick was in.
And it was crowded, Bruce was already there, since he was talking to one of the doctors along with Roy who was signing something while Bruce spoke to the doctor having the slightest of trembles on his hand, Roy on his end, full body tremors.
The rest of Bruce's kids were there, Damian was currently with Lian, both getting distracted by Duke who was playing into his phone with them, and Ollie appreciate it, Lian cared about Dick a lot, he wasn't only his dad's boyfriend he was also part of her family for years, she would be worried and anxious.
The rest of Bruce's kids were either sitting down or eating something sitting against the wall.
Connor went to Roy when the doctor left while Bruce just walked into the room no questions and yeah, Ollie wasn't blaming him, god knows how he runs when his kids are given a clear.
Mia went to sit down with Tim and Steph, they're talking while they tell Mia what happened, Emiko sits with Cass and gets offered a sandwich, she doesn't take it but it's still appreciated.
"I don't even know what happened Jason did try to tell me, but I don't think he was expecting surgery to happen" Roy said and Ollie actually looked around, and yeah, in the corner there was Jason Todd, looking like he's the one who shot Nightwing when he's pretty sure he wasn't.
"I'll go talk to him if you want, is Dick clear?" Connor suffers while Roy nods
"Yeah they just had some problems since he's an universal donor" Roy says and sights "they struggled to find someone he could receive blood from but he's fine" he says while Connor nods and leaves Ollie to it since he went to speak to Jason who just waved back stiff.
"Bruce beat you to it?" Ollie asks peeking a little into the room, Bruce was next to Dick who was barely awake trying to explain something with a smile while Bruce looked about ready to strangle him on desperation principle.
"Yeah," Roy says and chuckled "he was more worried than me when he arrived, Jason called them and they basically speed their way here"
"Did they help?" Ollie asks while Roy nods
"Yeah dick was hours in surgery, they made sure Lian slept and brought me food, the good stuff, not hospital, they went to a sandwich place nearby" Roy says and moves to crack his neck a little to release stress.
"Good, hospital food sucks nation wide" Ollie says while Roy chuckles
"You didn't haffta come ya'know?" Roy asks while Ollie shrugged
"Hey you sounded worried and we are family right?" Ollie says while Roy just gives it to him.
"Yeah all of us now, you're doomed to share family with Bruce" yeah don't remind me, he's spend the last couple months in denial about it.
"Could be worse I guess" acceptance finally, he looked around to see it.
Duke ,Tim and Mia are talking about a book, Dinah is talking to Barbara in a video call, Connor went to Emiko and Cass once he was done talking to Jason and while Bruce is busy being next to Dick he's leaving a chair out for Roy with a blanket while he takes the other side of Dick's bed, leaving it ready for Roy to spend the night next to Dick later.
Maybe it's not as bad.
__________________________________________________________
Jason stayed to the sides for the next day, he didn't shoot Dick but he felt responsible somehow, he does care for Dick he's not that much of an asshole.
He looks around to everyone talking and Bruce next to Dinah and Ollie eating something Jason doesn't care to identify before he walks into dick's room.
"Hey Jason" Dick says, he's in his laptop watching something with Roy before pausing it.
"Hey, I just wanted to say sorry for the other night" Jason says while Dick waves him off
"Nah, you didn't shoot me it's fine, the other guy is also fine you didn't kill him" Dick says with an easy smile "hey, what did you wanted to tell me before the whole thing?" Right shit.
Now Jason could tell him, but that'll ruin the calm, but also, it'll be funny, so he's stuck, he turns to see how everyone is to see how much he'll ruin it.
Bruce got dragged by Tim to play with him Connor, Duke, Stephanie, and Lian to Mario kart on the waiting room while Ollie played cards with Mia, Dinah, Damian, Emiko and Cass, it looked peaceful, Roy walked in just then to wave at him and sit back next to Dick to keep watching whatever they were watching.
"It's a dumb game on who catched more criminals, they just didn't tell you 'cuz you and Roy are together and could create drama" Jason lies, he'll tell Dick later, like a bombshell when he least expects it, it'll be more fun, and right now? Everyone is in peace despite dick being in the hospital.
"Little shits" Dick says while Roy laughs
"Thought you were gonna tell us about the whole thing about us not being able to have dates without them interrupting" Roy says while Dick laughs before hissing a little due to his wound, but Roy's words made Jason pause.
"You guys knew?" Jason asks weirded out, why didn't they stopped? Why wasn't anything in his family normal?
"Yeah, everyone forgets to hide things from Lian and she sent us photos" Dick says still trying to laugh "I didn't say anything cuz I wanted to see who would have the balls to tell me"
"I wanted to tell you, I just thought it'll ruin the mood!" Jason says while Roy laughs
"Nah don't worry, we've figured out a couple weeks ago, when Bruce was "hurt" we discovered it was fake" Roy says while Dick nods along.
"I was gonna go and yell at him but honestly we were getting along so meh not like you guys try to sabotage my relationship just my dates like jealous little brothers" Dick says making heart hands to be dramatic
"And i did want to yell at Ollie but Dinah intercepted my call so she could win 200 over Babs" Roy says while rolling his eyes a little
"And she lost tho" Dick says while Roy just shook his head.
"Truly tragic" Roy says before chuckling
"This family is insane" Jason says just leaving the room finding a spot to sit next to Tim just leaning into the seat and looking up.
He should get paid for this bullshit.
He is not.
His only hope is nobody gets any more stupid ideas like this, but knowing them, maybe Dick and Roy will take revenge on them.
He is doomed.
