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A week and a half has passed since the kiss. If you could even call it that. He just brushed Light’s lips. He had hesitated.
Hesitation leads to death. At least in their line of work. Any extra moment a criminal runs free is another life ruined.
That’s why Light continues to fight alongside L.
L sits in his usual crouch on an armchair near their bed. Light is currently showering in the bathroom.
It’s late at night. The curtains have been drawn to hide them from the world, to protect them from those who could be peeking in.
Lately, L’s been sleeping more. He hasn’t been able to piece together why he’s fallen into this routine. He can only get proper rest when Light lays beside him.
The pattern then became that L would wait until Light finished getting ready for bed to try and get some sleep. It gets quite awkward after that point because neither know how to start the topic of sleeping in the same bed or who gets in first.
Mornings are better. L wakes with his head on Light’s chest or nestled into his shoulder. Light’s hands rest on his waist or in his hair.
He wants to spend every morning like that. Or at least, every morning his body lets him. But, Light won’t stay forever. Eventually, he’ll move on and find true domesticity. L will be left alone in this cottage mourning his first love.
Love?
It’s been forever since he has felt the feeling of love. He has distant memories of his parent’s love or the fondness that Watari always carries with him. Romantic love wasn’t something he was used to.
It sounds right. No. It feels right.
I’m in love with Light.
The six months that he was away from Light felt horrible. Now, Light’s by his side every single day. They barely have any time apart. But, for some odd reason, it works for them.
Light is like an open book. There’s part of him that wishes he could be a normal detective. The other part, the one that loves this strange, queer, domestic life they live, knows that leaving would ruin them both.
L gets up from his chair and climbs into bed. He curls against Light’s pillow. It smells like his shampoo. He can feel the sleep pulling him in.
Light’ll join me soon. I can rest.
Light steps into the running water of the shower. It’s warm. Like the rare hugs he gets from L. Or more recently, the nighttime cuddles disguised as sleep.
He starts his shower routine. L comments that it takes too long. Light shoos him away. This is the only alone time he can get to think.
L is waiting in their bedroom.
He can’t admit that he just needs to be held while he sleeps. Dork.
Light’s back touches the tiled wall of the shower as he looks at the shower curtain. He’s staring off into space.
Just a couple walls away is L.
He truly shouldn’t be free like this. Light Yagami was Kira. He should’ve been executed or if he was lucky, in prison for life. Instead he’s living as a housewife for a detective that never shows his face to the world.
L gave him grace. Much more than he deserved. And for what? He missed him? A mind that was just as smart as his, a person that made sure he wasn’t noticed, a soul just as lost as his. That’s what Light Yagami is.
Enemies, rivals, friends, two sides of the same coin, the perfect mirror image of the other. The list goes on. Any label could fit them. Even lovers.
Am I a teenager? I’m daydreaming about dating someone while showering.
His parents always said he’d get married to a lovely woman and have kids in the future. That he had a good life ahead of him. It was always a gross idea to him. That’s not what he wanted in life.
The day he finally accepted himself as gay, was terrifying. He lived in a country that hated everyone different. His sister may have accepted. His parents? No, never.
Living the rest of my life in this cottage with L. Huh.
Perhaps since day one of meeting this quirky detective, he’d been falling in love. Those moments of silence surrounded by the Task Force had tension. Easily labeled as rivals but the truth was a connection that nobody but them could understand.
I love L.
That night, Light was greeted with L already dozing off in bed. He rolled his eyes and climbed in. He doesn’t think as he pulls L into his arms or how L wraps himself like a spider monkey.
It’s what they are now. Nothing more, nothing less.
“I can never understand how you are this comfortable,” L’s sleep-ridden voice is quiet in their room but louder against his ear.
Light doesn’t respond. L isn’t one to open up. Did this even count?
“I don’t think I could live without you,” L talks again.
“I know I couldn’t,” Light’s hand drifts to find L’s. His thumb gently rubs the back of L’s hand.
Light takes a deep breath before continuing. “This cottage has felt more like home than Japan ever did. I could stay right here with you forever.”
“You’re changing me, Light Yagami. I’m sleeping more, eating better, and you make me feel emotions that were lost to me.” L is starting to nod off. The seconds between each word are becoming longer and longer. “I love you.”
“Mhmm. I love you.” Internally, Light knows it should’ve been a dramatic moment with them. Then again, it’s still perfect and unapologetically them. Making a big deal out of small things and vice versa.
Light opens his eyes to see L facing him. He takes the dive first this time.
His head goes silent as he presses his lips to L’s. The world is melting around them. It’s gentle. That’s all they have the energy for.
Light pulls away just enough to kiss the tip of L’s nose. He pulls L closer and lets the darkness and silence surround them.
The moon is their guard now. They can love each other safely.