Chapter Text
my name is joel smalls. i'm 13, and today is my birthday, and very possibly my last one. my mum placed the cake on the table. strawberry. let's go! gem poked me in the stomach. "hey joel, pass me that drink." pouring a cup of punch to for gem i muttered under my breath. "yeah sure, thanks princess." i passed the drink over to gem, and i could have sworn that in the clear purple liquid, i saw a thunderbolt. and that's when skizz came in. Mr handsome, nice, great hair, genuinely friendly, perfect, kind, rich, ripped, skizz. everyone loves skizz. i love skizz. but i just don't think he's that great. he's honestly kinda annoying sometimes. I'M NOT JEALOUS OF HIM. skizz waved at me and flashed those perfect, pearly, straight teeth. like seriously, how much does he brush?
skizz sat down next to me, and passed me a drink. he looked in the cup for just a second. "sorry. i just thought i saw something in there." i snorted. "a thunderbolt?" skizz shook his head. "no. a heart. like the cartoon type." gem laughed. "you boys are hallucinating." mum clapped her hands. "ok boys and gem! joel's got candles to blow out!" i leaned over, but gem tugged on my shirt. "joel. maybe you weren't hallucinating. because i swear i just saw one of those ancient greek instrument things in my cup." i felt my eye twitch. "it's called a lyre gem. A LYRE." gem rolled her eyes. "whatever." i love gem. she's my favourite cousin. but by god, her saying "whatever" about ancient greece made me want to punch her.
tap tap tap. i turned over to gem. "you heard that right? i mean i know it was kinda muffled by the world's thickest curtains-" skizz's dad turned around. "heard what kiddos?" skizz pointed to the window. "didn't you hear that tapping?" skizz's dad shook his head. "sorry skizzie boy, i didn't hear anything." skizz crossed his arms. "i can tell you're lying dad." skizz's dad awkwardly waved his hands. "no no no i'm not lying-" skizz rolled his eyes. "it was probably a tree branch. stop trying to scare me." skizz's dad was clearly relieved. "oh. yeah. probably." my mum came in with a knife, and began to cut the cake...which was when a monster broke through our window. "WHAT THE HECK!?!" the monster, which i could now see was some sort of birdwoman with the face of an emaciated woman with sunken eyes, and a long tongue. she dug her face into my birthday cake, candles and all, and swallowed it whole. then she turned her black eyes to me, gem and skizz. "prepare to die godlings." skizz's dad tried to distract her by throwing a chair at her, but she just ripped a deep gash into him causing him to bleed all over. "dad!"
skizz's eyes flashed with an anger that i almost never saw from him. he took out the old hairpin his late mother had given to him...which turned into a bow in his hands. "...what." the creature jumped, skizz let the arrow shoot, and he hit her in the leg, causing her to take to the sky. "oh crap oh crap MUM HELP!" my mum grabbed the car keys, threw a fork into the harpy's eye and threw my dad's old walking stick at me. "follow me! if she comes after you, use the stick!" me gem and skizz, carrying skizz's bleeding dad ran out to the car, when the injured harpy landed in front of us. gem startled and sent some sort of light blast directly into the eyes of the creature, leaving it blinded in one eye. "i can't see, i can't see!" the dark feathered creature leapt towards me, but before skizz could notch an arrow, or gem could try and blind it in the other eye, i instinctively rolled away and threw my dad's stick at it. but as it hurtled towards the monster, it turned into a thunderbolt and evaporated the harpy, turning it into golden dust. "joel! get down here! now." looking down at my mother, i nodded and ran out of our apartment. the 3 of us kids and two adults piled into mum's car. i'd always thought the worst part of moving to the usa would be idiot americans, not bird monsters! "mum, what's going on?!" my mum sighed. "joel. you, skizz and gem are demigods. like, greek myth demigods."
i wish i could say i said something as cool as i am. so very. but instead i said: "WAIT WHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT?!?" great job me. really cool. my mum nodded. "yes joel. your father is zeus."
my jaw dropped. "ZEUS?!?"