Work Text:
Sunshine bleeds through your blinds and scatters across your room. A familiar tune blares from your alarm and you reach your hand over to turn it off. The room falls silent as you make your way to stand up and start off a new day.
As you open the blinds, the sun’s rays compliment the varying TV Time merchandise scattered around. At this point, it has become something of a shrine. Products made in Tenna’s and Spamton’s likeness both official and handmade have found a home in your room.
You walk over to your mirror. Looking into it, you notice the bags under your eyes, likely from reading fan fiction way too late into the night. You fix your hair into something manageable, maybe a messy bun, maybe not. You look at a picture taped to your mirror. It was an unsigned autograph of Tenna and Spamton. One day, you’d hope that you would be able to get it signed. With one last dreamy glance, you make your way downstairs and ponder on what to eat.
You reach the end of the staircase and find your mom sitting at the table, knee bouncing and cigarette in hand.
“Good morning mom.” You say.
She glances up at you and nods.
You walk over to the kitchen and pour yourself a bowl of cereal and a cup of coffee. Once you sit down your mother looks at you and snuffs out her cigarette, “Eat your breakfast and pack some essentials, you’re going away for a while and be ready by 10.”
Your eyes nearly pop out of your head, “What?”
“Money’s getting tight, so I'm sending you away.”
You can’t believe what you’re hearing, “Can’t something else go?”
“No.” She answers coldly.
“What about your habits?!” “Are they more important than me?!” You yell.
All she does is scowl, giving you a ‘don’t be stupid’ look.
“Look.” She starts, “I’m not sending you off with some pervert or some shit, I saw this ad being a tailor for that TV Time show you like, it provides room and boarding, so you won’t be sleepin’ in a trash can.”
You couldn’t believe what you just heard. A tailor for the stars themselves, was this a blessing in disguise or had you really lost your mind?
“I figured it was the best option, considering the band One Direction hasn’t formed yet.”
You look at your mother with confusion, “Huh?”
She tsk, “Nothin’ eat your fuckin’ breakfast already.”
…………………………………………………………………………………………
You sat on your bed, mind racing with all the possibilities of what comes next. Your eyes graze over the picture of the two stars. You rush over to pluck it from your mirror and place it with your luggage, today was the day that photo would finally be signed.
Your eyes glaze over your room, if you’d known that this would have been your last day in it, you would have probably tidied it up a little. The thought made you a little sad. Yes, your home life wasn’t ideal, but still. Would she preserve your room? Have it become a happy little fangirling museum? Or would it be barren by tomorrow? Have it been sold online for objectively good money.
Your thoughts were cut short by a sudden yell, “Y/N, hurry up, your rides here!”
You grab your luggage and make your way downstairs all while hoping for the best. A green pippin stands at the door while talking with your mother. He looks like he hasn’t seen a bed in ages and didn’t come here under his own volition.
Your mother faked a cheery voice, “Now there you are!” “I was just talking about what a wonderful tailor you are and how proud I’d be to see your pieces on the screen!” She lied through her teeth, yes she had been proud of your skills, but rather never once watched an episode of TV Time after the pilot, claiming it to be tacky.
The green pippin looked over to you, “Well I hope you're all packed, because we got less than thirty minutes till the show starts.”
You nodded and offered to put your luggage up, leaving you and your mother alone for your last goodbyes.
You took in a breath, “Well, I guess this is goodbye.” “Hopefully this is all for the better and we’ll get to live richer lives because of such.”
Your mother looked you dead in the eyes, “Piece of advice Y/N.” You listened closely
“Y’dont have to sleep with the John, but leaving two to three buttons undone nerve hurts no one.”
A loud honk from outside alerted you to get a move on.
All you could muster was, “Ok, mom.”
You made your way out waving bye to your mother for the very last time.
…………………………………………………………………………………………
You stepped out from your front door, with your chariot awaiting you. What you’d thought would be a limousine or one of Spamton’s Cungadero, was actually an ICE-Es P”E”ZZA van.
The green pippin motioned you to sit up front with him, “Sorry if you wanted your personal space, but the back is currently full of a bunch of crappy prizes.”
“What kind of prizes?” You asked.
The green pippin scoffs, “Shit like TV dinners, TV slop, and whatever the hell a dog dollar is.” “Yknow a lot of prizes are some cash, maybe a new washer and dryer if you win big, but this stuffs all clutter, don’t even get me started on that damn golden statue of himself, I thought it’d be a little shelf decor, but no!” “Damn thing takes up a whole corner of a room.
He cools down from his rant and starts the car.
A few minutes go by before you ask the question that’s been burning on your tongue, “Sooooo, what’s it like working for the big shots themselves?”
The green pippin halted at a red light and then turned to face you, “You religious?”
“Uhh.”
“‘Cause I suggest you start praying.”
The light turns green and he starts driving again.
“Pray for what, exactly?”
He groans, “A decent lunch break, not getting your pay docked due to Tenna’s bad mood, for that smarmy short stack to disappear.” He mumbled out the last one.
You fidgeted with your hands, “Well, is there a silver lining, or some kind of benefit?”
He sighed, “Well in your case, you won’t have to live with that dead beat mom of yours no more.” “Sorry, it’s not my place to say, but you seemed relieved when we started driving.”
He was right, you were relieved, but all you could do to respond was nod.
He took it as a sign to shut up for a while.
Would working for Spamton and Tenna truly be that dreadful? You hoped that the Angel would give you grace.
…………………………………………………………………………………………
The van parks at the grand studio. The green pippin steps out and you follow suit. He leads you towards a double door in the back, guarded by a Zapper.
“Dis the new tailor the bosses were talkin’ about?” They ask.
Tenna and Spamton were talking about you? Well you supposed that any new hire would become a conversation, but still, they were thinking about you… Kind of.
“Yep, this is the newbie.” Answered the green pippin.
You smile at the guard, “Hi, I’m Y/N.”
The Zapper waved, “Well, it’s nice to meet’cha!”
The green pippin groaned, “Can you let us through, we’re on a time limit, Y’know?”
The guard obliged and opened the doors.
You walk inside a bright green room. Stars slowly descend down the wall and the floor looks nearly reflective.
The green pippin scurries off to grab a headset, “You stay here for a bit, I gotta let the big shots know that you’re here.” And just like that, he was off.
You glance around the place. There were two couches and two CRT TVs to accompany them. In the corners lie two cactuses, or is it cacti? You glance back and see two doors both plastered with a star, but only one had the letter S. Your eyes shifted to the side and noticed the bar. You decided that you had nothing better to do than check it out.
You wander over and take a seat on a barstool. You look around the area, little prizes and meals are scattered around along with a door in the very back. Suddenly, a fluffy purple plug boy emerges from below the counter.
“I don’t wish to rush ya, but you’d better head towards the stage, the show’s about to start any minute now.”
“Oh, I’m not a contestant.”
“Is that so?” “Well then, may I ask who you are?”
“Y/N, I’m the new tailor for TV Time.”
“It’s lovely to meet you Y/N, the name’s Ramb.”
He puts out a hand to shake and you take it.
You looked around the room once more.
“Any idea when my tour guide will be back?” You ask.
“‘Fraid not, he’s usually up to his neck in work, and Tenna might have given him a new assignment.”
You sigh and decide to wait around.
“Soooooooo, is it nice working here?” You ask.
Ramb gives you an uncomfortable look.
“Oh Angel, I’m fucked, aren’t I?” You lament.
“Now, now, I haven’t said anything yet.”
“Does your expression not say it all?”
“No, not quite.”
Ramb sighs, “How should I put this?”
You lean in closer.
“Their TV personas are truly charismatic and the same can be said about them when off stage… sometimes, at least.”
“Tenna is a charming man, but also bossy, moody, petulant, and possesses an ego far bigger than he.”
“But he has a big heart too, especially for his viewers… all he wants is to make them happy.”
“And Spamton?” You ask.
Ramb huffs, “Well I wouldn’t say he’s quite as charismatic as Tenna, in fact he’s prickly, paranoid, stubborn, and is probably just as egotistical as Tenna.”
You sigh.
Ramb continue, “That being said, he’s s truly inspiring.” “He completely built himself up from the bottom, and now he’s here working side by side with a ruler… he makes you want to become the best possible you.”
Your spirits lifted a little, “Really?” You said, hope lingering in your voice.
“Really.” He assures.
Ramb picks up a glass and starts to clean it, “They’re kind of a match made in heaven for each other.”
“Why’s that?”
“Oh you’ll know soon enough, luv.”
The doors to the stage suddenly swing open and the green pippin emerges behind them, noticeably more irritated than he was before.
“Oh good, you’re still here.” He states.
“C’mon now, you’ve got a spot backstage, so I can make sure you’re introduced to Mr Tenna and Spamton.
You hop off your seat and wave Ramb goodbye, “See ya around, Ramb.”
Ramb smiles, “Cheers.”
…………………………………………………………………………………………
The green pippin led you out of one room and into another. You stand by another set of double doors with a sign above, reading game, and two Tenna statues to accompany it.
He then turns to you, “And remember, quiet on set, unless you want to be fired on the first day.”
He then opens the doors.
He leads you through cherry red curtains. You look around and see some familiar faces. You spot Elnina and Lanino chatting and holding each other's hand, it made you smile knowing that they were just as lovely dovey off camera as they were on. You spot a rainbow smiley darkner, it must have been the eccentric Shuttah, a master at capturing one’s beauty.
He stops walking and then you spot the podiums. TV Time’s intro starts to play and your SOUL nearly leaps out of your chest when you see them. Mr (Ant) Tenna and Spamton G. Spamton stood before the crowd as the curtain lifted. You watch the two actors put on the show of their lives, really it was like every other episode, but being that close made you feel the magic that went into TV Time. It was always a dream of yours to see them live, but you’d never have thought it would be from a few meters away.
The show wrapped up and roses were collected from the stage. The green pippin rushed you over to Tenna and Spamton for your introduction.
“Mr Tenna, Spamton.” As he spoke, the two big shots turned and looked, they looked at him and then you. Oh my god they are looking at you, act natural, don’t be weird and obsessive, oh god you should’ve showered this morning, oh god, oh god, oh god, oh god.
“I presume you remember your advertisement for a new tailor, we here they are!” “Why don’t you introduce yourself, Y/N?” With that the green pippin wandered elsewhere, leaving you to embarrass yourself in front of the most popular people in TV World.
You take a deep breath, “Hi, I’m Y/N, I recently received the news that I’ll be working as your in-studio tailor and costume designer.” You breathe out and stick out your hand for a handshake.
Tenna is the first to take it, he shakes your hand a few times and introduces himself, “Well it’s lovely to meet you Y/N!” “You probably already know my name, but just in case you’ve forgotten…” He poses in a noble stance “I’m Mr Ant Tenna, the lord of the screens and this darkworld’s humble ruler, but you can just call me Tenna!”
Spamton took your hand next and gave it a single firm shake, “Spamton G. Spamton, it’s nice to meet you [Y/N].” He looks at you and makes a face, “[I] swear we had just put out that ad yesterday, how’d you get here so fast?”
“Oh, well…” You stuttered, “My mother told me about it and how I should apply for it, guess I just got lucky to be picked so quickly.”
“Huh, well she sounds like a nice lady.” Said Spamton.
You awkwardly nod and smile, not wanting to air out the ethics your mother practiced.
“Well Y/N, we’re happy to have you aboard!” Tenna stated.
You smiled, maybe this was truly for the better.
…1 month at TV Time…
Well, the green pippin and Ramb were certainly correct about Tenna and Spamton being a lot. You worked harder than you ever had in your life and deadlines were constant.
…2 months at TV Time…
TV Time is on a role, one of the best years it has ever had since its conception. You feel that you may be making a difference around here. You get to speak to Tenna and Spamton more too, like Ramb said, they are truly charming. You sometimes catch yourself daydreaming about them sometimes, little innocent fantasies of course… Most of the time, at least.
…3 months at TV Time…
You decided to reconnect with your mother, see how she's doing and what not. Spamton was nice enough to help you with finding her email account.
Dear mom,
It’s been awhile, how are you? I myself am doing well. Working for TV Time has opened a whole new world for me and I wanted to thank you for it… I mean really I shouldn’t because of the ethical concerns and what you did was pretty fucked. But still, it was for the better.
By the way, what money did you even make by abandoning me here? I haven’t heard about any payments, so what’s up with that?
Sincerely, Y/N
…4 months at TV Time…
You await your mothers response, you don’t know whether she didn’t get your email, if she is ignoring you, or if she overdosed. In the meantime, you’ve really warmed up to Spamton and Tenna, and they have warmed up to you too. You still hesitate to call them your friends, but everyday you feel a little closer. You even found out why Ramb called them a match made in heaven, albeit in a less pg way then you thought it would be… Never interrupt them during Tenna’s ‘maintenance’ as they called it.
…5 months at TV Time…
You had finally received a response from you mother, you sit in your chair in anticipation and the Email read,
Dear Y/N,
No child = more money for drugs, obviously.
Sincerely, your mom
You decided that you’d cut contact with her after that.
……..……..…….......…6 months at TV Time……..……..……..……..
December 31st, 1997. TV Time was covered in the most picturesque snow. Christmas decorations lingered around, Tenna was quite sentimental about them so they were only to be taken down by New Year’s Day. The studio is the most beautiful you’ve ever seen.
Music sang in the green room and could be heard throughout the hallways. It’s Ramb’s busiest night, he’s stuck pouring champagne for all the workers, so he's very little conversation. While it saddened you, you at least had more friends than before.
You looked over to the weather couple, they were a few drinks in and had been slow dancing with each other for the last twenty minutes. You decided that starting a conversation would be intrusive at best and awkward at worst. So you looked elsewhere, leaving the two of them in their own little world.
You walked and ended up bumping into Spamton.
“Oops, sorry about that, Spam.”
In the time you’ve known him, you both developed a friendship, and not the kind that it felt as if he was just putting on his salesman act, the kind where it felt like he truly enjoyed your company. True to Ramb’s words, he was inspiring. You bonded with the enjoyment of creation and arts. He also loved the way you styled him for photo shoots.
Were you anyone else, he would’ve given them a cold shoulder but he smiled warmly, “All’s forgiven, actually [I] was hoping to see you.”
“Oh yeah, what’s up?”
“Well [Tens] was thinking that once he wraps up the final segments and starts the one hour count down, he’d host a little celebration in his office… He thought you should come along too.”
Your heart flutters at the offer. Along with the friendship you’ve developed with them, other feelings have also emerged. You had already thought they were the most handsome people in all of TV world, but now after knowing them… Wait, is this even a good idea?
Spamton must have read your expression, “Ah shit, [I] just realized how sketchy that sounds” He says, “Listen, we’re inviting you ‘cause you’re our [friend].” “We were planning to go there so it wouldn’t be as crowded and so we can actually hear ourselves talk.”
You smile at him, “Sounds lovely, I’ll be sure to join y’all.”
Spamton’s face glows a little rosy at your answer. You tell yourself it’s just from the drinks, but part of you knew otherwise.
You and Spamton wait outside the stage. You glance at the doors, reminiscing on that fated day half a year ago. The doors that led you down a bright new path. Said doors suddenly swing open and Tenna walks out from them.
“Well isn’t it the two people i wanted to see most!” He has a tired yet triumphant sound to his voice. He gives Spamton a peck on the lips, that for some reason makes you feel a twinge of jealousy… For both of them.
Tenna turns to you with a smile that melts away the previous emotion, “Did Spammy fill you in about our little shindig?”
You nodded.
“Well great, let me lead the way!” Tenna predictably takes Spamton’s hand, and to your surprise, he takes yours too. You glance at Spamton’s hand, apparently interlocking fingers was still only for him though.
You all arrive at Tenna’s office. The walls are covered in posters and tacky decor. Tenna walks over to his desk and finds a basket with a note,
-To my favorite big shots, may every year be brighter than the last.
-Your friend, Mike
Tenna plucks out a bottle of wine and several boxes of chocolates.
“Well isn’t he the sweetest!” Tenna remarks.
Spamton glances at the production date on the bottle and makes a pleased noise.
You stand there awkwardly, not sure if you're interrupting what otherwise would be an intimate moment without your presence.
“Oh Y/N would you be a dear and grab all three of us some glasses, they’re in that cabinet over there!” Tenna says in such a cheery tone that reminds you that you were invited and that they wanted you here.
You grab the glasses, “Now don’t get too drunk, or else you won’t be able to countdown.” You tease.
Spamton laughs, “[Y/N], what do you take us for, a couple of lightweights?”
…Several glasses later…
“And that’s when [I] got to test out the old ejection seats on his sorry ass!” Spamton slurred.
You and Tenna doubled over laughing, “Oh Spammy!” Tenna giggles, “Please don’t tell me that they all have that feature!”
Spamton chuckles, “Ha no, that was apparently against the law and [I] had to remove all of them, well almost all of them.”
Tenna gasps, “Spamton, you didn’t?”
“[I] did.”
You gasp, “No way!”
“That’s right!” “Neither of you better piss [me] off when [I’m] drivin’ y’hear!”
The wine really did all three of you over. In a short amount of time you began telling stories and giggling like it was a sleepover.
“What about you Y/N?” “Any crazy stories we don’t know?” Tenna asks.
The liquor ultimately loosens your tongue, “Did I ever tell y’all how I ended up with this job?”
“Uh yeah, your mom recommended it to you, tell us something interesting.” Spamton complains.
“Well that’s only partly true.” You respond.
Spamton and Tenna both perk up at your answer, inviting you to continue.
“My mother was under the impression that she was selling me off to you both and for what, you may ask?” “Drug money!” “And it’s not like giving me away got her any, it was just less to spend on, and she probably sold some of my shit while she was at it!” You were laughing, but they weren’t. They were uncharacteristicly quiet.
“Oh Angel.” Tenna started, “I’m so sorry.”
“Jeez.” Spamton sighed.
The both scooched closer to you, trying their best to be of any comfort, but you just feel awkward now. You thought it would be funny! It’s not like it still bothered you… Mostly.
“[Y/N].” Spamton said.
“I’m sorry.” You whisper
“Hey, no, there’s nothing to be sorry about.” Tenna says.
Your eyes begin to water and they both decide to hold you close.
“I didn’t want to bring the mood down.” You confess.
“Hey, it’s ok, we’re not mad.” Spamton says.
“Goodness, you kept that all in for nearly half a year?” Tenna asks.
You nod and they both curl in closer.
After a moment of quiet, Tenna asks, “Do you miss her?” “Your old home?” “Your old life?”
You shake your head, “No, not at all.”
“Do you still talk to her?” Spamton asks.
“No, I cut contact some months ago.” You answer.
Spamton chuckles sadly, “[I] don’t know whether we should be happy that [I] put out that ad or not.”
“I’m happy you did.” Your answer took them by surprise. “You both are wonderful and dear friends to me.” “That day I met you both might have been the happiest moment of my life.” Your words melted their hearts.
You search for something in your pocket, “I know it’s stupid, but I have this poster I brought with me and just for closure or something, I was wondering if you could sign it?”
Tenna and Spamton look at each other and then at you. You look away, “I know it’s silly and maybe a little creep-“ you were cut off by the noise of a marker squeaking against the photo.
They looked at you and smiled, handing back the finally signed autograph.
You giggle, “Thanks, I really appreciate it.”
A time suddenly appeared on the corner of Tenna’s screen counting down the last thirty seconds of 1997. Spamton and Tenna glance at each other in a way that seems like a decision was made.
“Y/N?” Tenna coos.
Your face grows warm, “Yes, Tenna?
“We were wondering, well… You know how people are when the countdown hits zero-”
Spamton groans, “Oh for [Angel’s] sake, [Y/N], can we kiss you?”
Your SOUL nearly beats out of your chest, you are at a loss for words, but thankfully you had half the mind to eagerly nod.
All three of you are now flustered. The timer hits ten seconds and you can hear the others' countdown as you scooch closer.
Ten! Nine!
You can feel their breaths against your skin.
Eight! Seven!
All hearts are drumming at various and high paces.
Six! Five!
You feel their hands hold you closer.
Four! Three!
Tenna’s screen is so big and you worry if their noses will poke your eye.
Two! ONE!
Well, there’s no time like the present.
HAPPY NEW YEAR!
All three of you leaned into a three way kiss. Their lips tingled against yours, especially Tenna’s. You felt lost in the moment, like the whole world stopped just to appreciate the love between the three of you. Love, is that really what it was? You sure hoped so. The three of you kissed away the night, fearing the moment would end. Sure, you could blame it on the alcohol, even if at that point you three barely had a buzz on, but still, you all knew better than that.
…………………Several Years Later…………………
The three of you laid in a ginormous bed with a pipis swaddled in a blanket. You were telling her the story of how you all met and fell in love… You all decided to tell her about the divorce and the rekindling of love when she was a little older.
When you tucked her into her cradle and returned to your husbands, you found them snuggled up with a small gap in between for you. You smiled and made yourself comfortable in bed. Many things have happened over the years, good and painful. None of you are the exact same people from that night, but just like before, you all shared a kiss, just like your first.
