Chapter Text
It was God.
"Wilbur," Techno nudged his shoulder, "Are you seeing what I'm seeing?"
On a podium in the centre of the crowd stood a lanky Terran dressed in lavish garments. Lights blared behind him, illuminating his figure in a hallowed light.
Thousands of eyes were drawn to the deity as he tipped his hat and bowed, "I am Tommy Innes, the greatest magician to grace this planet." He spoke in a loud voice that commanded attention, "Prepare to be amazed."
The Terran smirked, sending chills down Wilbur's spine. He turned to Techno, lost for words.
"Yeah... I see it."
________________
By nightfall, the two aliens had returned to the spacecraft and proceeded to panic.
"This changes everything!" Wilbur screeched, scraping his nails against the wall. "I didn't even know things like that existed. I thought shit like that was fiction! What even is a magician?!"
"I'd assume it's some kind of religious figure."
"What do we do then? How do we even tell the council that we met a God?!"
"I don't know, Wilbur, but please stop shouting. I'm getting a headache." Techno rubbed his temple and picked up a book and quill to document the day's events.
"how do we know if the 'magician' is a threat to the expedition? What do we do then?" Wilbur tried to dig his nails deeper into the panels.
"Then we'll have to monitor them and find out." He replied, dipping the quill in ink. "And stop scratching the walls."
"No, absolutely not. I'm not going anywhere near that thing."
"C'mon, our disguises are flawless. What's the worst that could happen?"
"Death." Wilbur deadpanned, taping his blunt nails on a panel.
"Eh, Technicalities..."
That night, Wilbur promised himself that if he ever dies at the hands of the 'magician', he will be dragging Techno down with him.
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That night, Tommy stumbled back to his crumbling apartment, exhausted.
He tore off the trenchcoat that was practically glued to him and flung himself onto his bed. Despite his fatigue and the rashes that ran up his arms, he felt giddy.
He felt exhilarated, remembering the feeling of all those eyes on him. All of those people cheering him on, the look of amazement, bewilderment. It was incredible.
Things were finally looking up for Tommy Innes. Any day now, he could become the person he always dreamed of being, to have the life he had always wanted.
The blonde closed his eyes and smiled.
The universe shifted beneath him.
________
"This is a bad fucking idea, Techno."
"Eh, I've had worse." The pinkette shrugged and walked ahead, casually ignoring his complaints.
Wilbur huffed and ran after him, clumsily dodging the Terrans that strolled by. "And I thought you were supposed to be the smart one." He mumbled under his breath.
"I heard that."
"Stupid, dumb Piglin hearing," Wilbur muttered quieter.
"I heard that as well."
Eventually, the two made it back to the podium just in time to see what the God spoke to be the 'final act'. The title was certainly... ominous, to say the least.
The deity pulled a sword from his trenchcoat and positioned it to point at his chest. "The final act; evading certain death." They laughed as they plunged the sword into their own heart.
The two closed their eyes as the blonde violently stabbed himself. As much as Techno would hate to say it, Wilbur might've been right.
Coming back here was a mistake.
The crowd gasped and cheered, causing the two aliens to shudder at the cruelty. The pinkette reluctantly opened his eyes, preparing to witness a gruesome scene. What he wasn't expecting to see was the blonde deity grinning wildly at him. Staring directly at him.
The sword had pierced straight through their body, yet the Deity stood tall, unaffected by the wound. The God barked out a laugh as the crowd roared with praise.
"I need you to open your eyes and tell me I'm not hallucinating." Techno shook Wilbur's shoulder. "Please, Wilbur."
"What do you- What the fuck." The brunette opened his eyes to a moment that he would never forget. There was so much blood.
"Wilbur, are you seeing what I'm seeing? They have immortality."
The alien only stood there in shock, on the verge of fainting. They're doomed.
"I'm passing out."
_______
Tommy's eyes scanned the cheering crowd as he wiped the fake blood off his clothes. His gaze locked onto two people whose jaws seemed to unhinge with how open their mouths were.
The boy gave them a warm smile once he recognized them as the same people from last night's performance. The pink-haired one violently shook in response.
Now, Tommy likes to refer to himself as a 'self-proclaimed empath'. Understanding how someone is feeling is a part of his many high-quality traits.
And he's pretty sure that he just made this pink bitch's day. He looks so happy!
He can practically see the joy pour off his face as he shakes his brother to watch with him. The sight nearly brought a tear of joy to his face.
Sometimes he amazes himself with his own skills. To bring such happiness to someone's life is what he does best. It's what he's a natural at doing. People wish they were as charismatic as himself. Tommy could already tell that those two would become lifelong fans.
"People of London!" Tommy shouted, projecting his voice across the city, "You all have been a delightful audience, but, unfortunately, all good things must come to an end."
Tommy bowed dramatically, quickly sneaking something out of his pocket, "Goodnight, London!" He exclaimed, throwing the object to the ground.
Within seconds, his body was enveloped in smoke. The people went wild as the fog slowly spread into the crowd.
Once the smoke had dispersed, he disappeared from sight, blending in with the audience. The only trace that was left of him was a small trail of 'blood'.
It might be the oldest trick in the book, but it was Tommy's favourite for a reason. What can he say? He's a sucker for dramatic exits.