Chapter Text
The clock in the dorm was ticking rapidly in the dark night. A cloud of gloom loomed over Sirius’ head as he lay on the bed staring at nothing in particular. Today was their last night at Hogwarts, tomorrow they would be adults- free and young and carefree. But they were being forced into war. James was passionate about fighting in the war and of course Sirius had to follow his footsteps.
But, he thought, why did they have to do this? They were barely eighteen, could they really fight in the war. He thought of the worst things that could happen, Remus, James, Lily, Peter, Marlene, Mary and Dorcas’ death and shuddered at the thought. He did not want that to happen. He tossed and turned in his bedsheets, trying not to worry about such things.
“Sirius.”, Remus was standing by Sirius’ bed, curtains pulled apart, “Can’t sleep?”
Sirius nodded weakly, trying to ignore the horrible image of a dead Remus lying on the ground, his hand held firmly by a dead Sirius. If he ever died he would die with Remus, he thought.
Remus held his hand and guided him to the common room. This time they had the couch by the fireplace to themselves. Sirius curled up on top of Remus, his head on Remus’ chest and his hand held firmly by him. “Remember when we did this back in first year?”, Remus chuckled.
“Mmm. You couldn’t sleep at that time.”, Sirius smiled fondly at the memory of an eleven year old him kissing the forehead of an eleven year old Moony. What made him think he was straight at that time? Remus kissed him softly behind his ear which tickled him greatly.
“I’m worried about the war.”, Sirius buried his face into Remus’ neck. Remus was gently stroking his tummy with his lovely hands. “I just saw these… images… of us cold and dead.”, he shuddered, “I don’t want any of us to die in the war.” He could feel Remus’ sharp silence.
“We won’t die in the war, my darling.”, Remus comforted him, “We will die nice and old after living a long and beautiful life.” They both knew that this wasn’t true, the war would drag on forever and they would all probably die. But these empty words in those dark times somehow managed to comfort them.
“I wish we could just run away.”, Sirius smiled softly, “To Wales. And live in a tiny little cottage, with Prongs and Lily and Pete and Marls and Dorcas and Mary. Just us being young and carefree y’know.”
“When the war is over”, Remus said, “We can go to Wales, sweetheart.” Sirius kissed him fiercely and felt Remus laugh into the kiss. “I love you.”, he said to him, “Love you too, my darling.”