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It was a day that Bruce Wayne was certain Jason would never forget.
He and a woman--a beautiful woman, by the name of Melina Snow, had been getting serious. Serious enough that he was considering telling her about Batman--she often hinted like she knew.
Well, she could also be terribly obtuse, but that had worked out well so far. She was a wonderful woman, having helped campaign for the local foster care support systems, backpacks for kids programs, and so on.
'An educated nation has the opportunity to do anything,' is what she'd said, smiling at him sweetly across her wine glass.
She was blonde. She had green eyes. She had pouty, pink-stained lips and the kind of cheekbones people went under the knife for, but also an air of authenticity. She was an archer, as more of a hobby, though she said she'd competed as younger woman.
He thought he knew her. Could see her passion for helping society, even as she had enough money to simply sit back and enjoy herself. The way she still did things like work out and play sports, active with kids and with her friends alike.
She was...seemingly healthy. Seemingly very good for him, bringing some authenticity to his life as Bruce Wayne--and he didn't mean that as a cover. He actually looked forward to being Bruce Wayne, to an extent, and the long conversations they'd have about actually important things, the way she could focus past the normal socialite, high society sort of talk.
Have in depth conversations about morality, ethics, philosophy...bring up all manner of related topics, understood the city's politics innately...and she was beautiful, and kind.
He had been thinking a lot about her.
And was thinking very soon, it would be time to introduce Jason to her.
He would have done it much sooner. Jason, however, had proved resistant, disappearing whenever the time came or watching from a cracked door.
It made sense. An upset to the balance, even if it wasn't a bad one, was going to throw Jason for a loop. Bruce had somewhat taken that into account in adopting him--and had really learned what it meant when the adoption was finalized.
Jason didn't deal well with abrupt change. He pretended he did, but he did not.
Even staying with Bruce, initially, despite his giddiness at being adopted, finally, having food, having a soft, warm bed, having a father, he'd had bouts of crying or hiding or so on. He'd pretend they didn't happen afterward, every time.
So, Melina. She was sitting in the living room, green eyes turned on Bruce, soft. She was wearing a sweater that was pink and fluffy, and she'd made the joke that 'I look like a strawberry marshmallow, don't I? Or rather, two parts of me...' And Bruce was sure that he'd heard Jason blanch from his hidden viewing place.
Well, at least that would give them some privacy.
"Melina, I had a thought..."
And Melina took that thought before he'd even spoken it. "I think it's too soon for anything big, but Bruce, you should know something about me before we get too far."
He was a little stunned by this, so he nodded.
Melina sighed. "I have been pregnant before. You probably heard about Stephen? My late husband. I like to say I owe my wisdom to him, he was..." she paused a moment, a sort of sad, and yet loving, smile on her face, "He was a good man. We learned and loved together, and that's hard to replace. Ever. But it's been five years, and I know he wanted me to be happy, to move on."
She didn't give him a chance to say a thing without doing something drastic or aggressive. "So, we did get pregnant. Before the chemo. It was hard--I'm not nearly as fertile as we'd hoped. IVF, all kinds of therapy to help us get pregnant..."
She pressed her lips together. "Only one embryo took. And that one had an abnormality and died."
Her green eyes flashed up to his, a sort of hope and determination in them. "But I know you and I can have an amazing life together--a family, a partnership, all of it."
He knew she knew about Jason. Hell, everyone did. He was a little startled by the frank discussion, but then, that was Melina. She didn't really beat around the bush. He nodded, a bit slowly, and said, "If we do go that direction...yes, we will have a family."
It felt like way too much commitment at once, and his heart was thrumming in his chest. His palms felt sweaty, and he shouldn't be this nervous, he was a top martial artist, he faced eldritch abominations, why wold this be making him so nervous?
But his heart felt fluttery, like it was scared. It was a feeling he hadn't had in a long, long time.
Melina smiled at him. It was a look of warmth, almost more than warmth, and she said, excitedly, "Yes. And I know they won't get my hair, considering the recessive trait, but at least they'll have light eyes, like ours."
Somehow, it wasn't creepy. Bruce had heard such talk from other women, but he wasn't romantically involved with those women. It was, however, a bit disturbing to him.
He wasn't certain why, quite yet. Not that Melina was creepy, just that something was a touch off, but well-intentioned.
"I...don't know how likely it is we'll have children," he said delicately. The truth was, he knew he wasn't extremely fertile himself. If Melina had such problems even with strong fertility measures, he wasn't certain they'd so much as conceive. But he wanted to reach out, to show that he wasn't an emotionally cold person. "But we can adopt. It's a process I've been through before--"
He'd intended to go into more glowing memories--the day Dick had 'slipped up' and called him Dad. The feeling when his elder son stopped missing his car when they came to pick him up from anything. Holding Jason for the first time--signing the papers and watching Jason scrawl his name, handwriitng even worse than usual because of his excitement.
But he didn't get to that. He was cut off.
"Oh, no, no, then they wouldn't be ours," Melina said, as if this was an important detail Bruce didn't understand. She didn't seem to say it in a callous way, so Bruce thought he must have misunderstood--or she misunderstood him.
"No, legally, it's exactly the same--" he started, knowing she was more familiar with foster kids, many of whom couldn't be adopted for various reasons.
"Yes, but I'd know in my heart," she sighed, giving him that look like he got it. Bruce was almost willing to believe she just didn't understand what he was saying, wanted to give her the benefit of the doubt even as he knew it wasn't the case.
She continued. "I mean, adoption is good and all, but--I'd rather have my kids. If we can have our own kids, we should--and we can afford to, so there's really no reason, not like before with those boys you adopted."
And Bruce could have held in the hurt, the rage starting to bubble in his chest, like his boys had ever been a second string pick, some leftovers for people who couldn't get their own, when he saw Jason's green eye through the crack in the door.
And he didn't know that he'd seen that much anguish in a long time.
So Bruce's jaw set. "I'm sorry, it's getting late. I need to get my son to bed."
"He's twelve, I'm sure he knows," Melina started, a confused frown starting on her face.
"He's my son. I take care of my children," Bruce said, a bit more gruffly than perhaps he meant to.
Melina seemed to maybe sense that she'd said something to upset him, but doggedly continued on--and suddenly the obtuseness wasn't endearing at all anymore. "Well, you could send him up with a snack and such--just let him know to go to bed and not stay up, I'm sure he knows by now--"
"I need you to leave," Bruce said flatly.
Melina finally got the hint, standing. "Well. Well, I see. I'll see you tomorrow, then--"
"I have plans."
"Besides ours...?"
"Yes. They just came up," Bruce said, and he didn't know how to cover the anger he felt much longer, because normally it wasn't hard, but normally it wasn't someone he'd started to trust, and normally he didn't see such pain in his son's eyes.
Melina huffed a bit, and tried to talk on about later dates and such, but Alfred showed her out.
Bruce found Jason wasn't in his spying spot, and instead discovered him in his normal place--an emptied out kitchen cupboard. He crouched down next to it, opening the door a bit. "Jason."
"Go away."
Bruce could hear the fact Jason had cried or was crying in that voice--it was undeniable. Whether they were rage tears or just pure pain and sorrow, he didn't know. "Jason, listen to me, it's okay--"
"Yeah, it's okay, cause you can marry that bitch and get kids you actually want! And they'll look like you, cause that's so goddamn special! And when you have your perfect family, with your two and half kids and your stupid tiny yapping dog--good for you, fuck you, you can have a great life w-w-without me--" and his voice broke down on the last one, and Bruce and could see him turn away, face hidden against the wall of the cupboard.
"I don't want that, Jason."
"Yeah, you do, cause she's got big breasts and shit," Jason snapped back. "Fuck you, I know I wasn't ever anyone's first choice."
Bruce was quiet a moment. Then, he said, softly, "Jason. When I saw you stealing my tires, do you remember me looking up and down the block for a different kid?"
"What?" Jason sounded confused.
"Do you remember me looking for someone else? Do you remember me coming back and settling for you?" Bruce's voice was earnest, but still soft.
He could hear Jason's hair rub against the wood of the cabinet. "No."
"No. Jason, the only reason Dick came first, was my son first, was because I met him first. Because conditions were right. Just like any parent who ends up with a baby. But do you know what?" And he'd never felt more nervous in his life, he thought, trying to word it right, praying he was saying the right thing.
"What?"
"I chose you. I wasn't looking for a son that night, but I found you and I chose you. I wasn't forced--there was no one strong-arming me. I wanted to take care of you. You may not be mine biologically, Jason, but you're mine. Period. You will always be my son."
There was a terrible silence, one where Bruce felt like his heart was beating a bit too fast, like he might start sweating all over again--had he ruined it further? Had he said the exact wrong words for Jason?
He was relieved when Jason came out of the cupboard, hesitantly for a moment, but then seeing Bruce's face and hugging him. Bruce hugged back tightly.
"I'm sorry you had to hear that. I didn't know she felt that way. I can assure you, we're not having kids together in any sense."
Jason hiccuped a laugh. The skin of his face was warm even through Bruce's shirt, a thin material. "Yeah, she can fuck herself." He snorted at his own wordplay.
"Jason, that's..." Bruce sighed, deciding to let it go this time. "Don't let Alfred hear you."
That made Jason laugh again, a settling back into feeling secure kind of sound.
They had ice cream after that. Father-son time, as Jason brightly called it, launching into stories about school and things.
And Melina Snow? Was informed that their differences were too great, after an actually private conversation after Bruce had cooled down and he had a chance to find out if she was stuck on that thought, which she was.
Bruce hoped that that day would not leave a mark on Jason.