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Your name is Peccant Scofflaw, and you are afraid that Pernicious Innovator has finally been pushed past his limit.
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A series of Mobsterswitch shorts that don't fit anywhere else. Some AU.
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When people say that Metropolis Central doesn’t sleep, it’s only a half truth. It’s true that there are no times at which this city is ever truly asleep, but there are times when it isn’t really awake, either. At the odd hours of night, when the sun is just ready to creep over the horizon but hasn’t made its way there yet, the city exists in a delirious and drowsy state. It’s then that you can get your dirtiest of businesses done.
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Bad Decision Time with Peccant Scofflaw by SelanPike
Fandoms: Problem Sleuth (Webcomic), MS Paint Adventures, MS Paint Fan Adventures
08 Jun 2018
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Life as an outlaw in Metropolis Central was hard. Well, no, that wasn’t entirely true. It was easy enough if you worked for Kingpin. Kingpin had everyone in his pocket, and anyone worth anything worked for him in one capacity or another. The only ones dumb enough to try to make it on their own were some assholes calling themselves the Twilight Scoundrels.
Scoff came up with the name. He could have done worse, Innovator supposed, but he could have done better, too. Scofflaw wasn’t known for his good decisions.
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Every once in a while I'll have a funny dream about characters. There's not a lot of context, but the interactions are fleeting and genuine, so I'd like to start cataloguing (and clarifying) them here. Usually pretty unapologetically author POV, but if you get a kick out of self-inserting, I'm happy! Sorry to everyone else :')
ToC
1) A late conversation with Droog
2) A brief run-in with Slick
3) Snowman, rain
4) Scofflaw's cryptic bullshit
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A string of missing informants and murders leads the newly formed Twilight Scoundrels to believe there may be one more Shadow Mage in the city than they thought. Now, what to do with them once found...
Angry Delinquent Origin Fic (Kind Of)
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A Legitimate Businessman returns in this thrilling sequel! Five years later, Jack "Spades Slick" Vantas has it all. An escape from the world of crime and conspiracy. A truly legitimate business. A future for his adopted son Karkat at a nice college. But when Karkat goes missing, Jack realizes he has only one chance to get his son back: summon (and incidentally hire) the problem sleuth known as Patrick Sloan.
Series
- Part 5 of A Legitimate Businessman
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Bookmark Notes:
The return of the Big Homie
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The Continuing Story of a Legitimate Businessman by Halberdier
Fandoms: Problem Sleuth (Webcomic), Homestuck
13 Apr 2020
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A LEGITIMATE BUSINESSMAN -- ACT IV
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What is there after the End of a Legitimate Businessman, when the Opening Act is over and the Best Laid Plans have gone awry? It turns out, there may yet be questions to answer and secrets to uncover. Join the intrepid problem sleuth Patrick Sloan and irascible mobster Jack Vantas as they put a period on the events that have transpired. But one curved line above a period can change that into a question mark.Series
- Part 4 of A Legitimate Businessman
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The Best Laid Plans of a Legitimate Businessman by Halberdier
Fandoms: Homestuck, Problem Sleuth - Fandom, Midnight Crew - Fandom
01 Jan 2015
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A LEGITIMATE BUSINESSMAN -- ACT II
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So the day's almost here, the moment of truth, the final event, the big group party takedown of The Felt. The Midnight Crew's here. Team Sleuth is here. Patrick Sloan, Peter Inesco and "Ace" Dick Dunn sit down around the table with Jack Noir, Paolo Diamante, Clint Duccio and Hank Bachman to lay out their plans, say their peace, then head out their separate ways before the big heist.Series
- Part 2 of A Legitimate Businessman
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Bookmark Notes:
oh god oh god oh god oh god oh god oh god oh god oh god oh god oh god oh god oh god oh god oh god oh god oh god oh god oh god oh god oh god oh god oh god oh god oh god
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Damara gets a nasty surprise for her birthday and loves every second of it by itsrose
Fandoms: Homestuck
18 Feb 2020
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Damara Megido Bukkake READ IT HERE
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When Will You Come Home? by Theatrical_Sorrow
Fandoms: Problem Sleuth (Webcomic), Homestuck
02 Aug 2022
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Sleuth has gone missing, and his partner's are worried sick.
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Broken Bones are Stronger by Path
Fandoms: MS Paint Adventures, Homestuck, Problem Sleuth (Webcomic)
24 Nov 2012
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Problem Sleuth is avoiding Spades Slick, but Pickle Inspector has really been given no choice but to bring them back together.
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Brushing off a lack of memory becomes really difficult when Problem Sleuth starts finding evidence that he committed the very crimes he's dedicated himself to stopping. But with the evidence piling up, Sleuth might not be able to get out of being thrown in the slammer this time.
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The Goddamn Miracle of Life by lucky_spike
Fandoms: Homestuck, MS Paint Adventures, Problem Sleuth (Webcomic)
27 Sep 2011
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Spades Slick genderbend in which Slick and Sleuth have sex, and a couple weeks later Slick's expertly-tailored clothes stop fitting right. Things go downhill from there.
An AU crackfic rom-com of sex, traitorous physiology and eventually babies.
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Pictures with Words by SelanPike
Fandoms: Problem Sleuth (Webcomic), MS Paint Adventures
14 Sep 2012
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Sometimes when I draw a fanart I'll write a really short story to go with it. I'm talking a paragraph or two.
Maybe I'll post those here?
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Slick's on his way back to the hideout when he runs into a little abandoned troll.
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A Conflict of Interests by prometheanTactician
Fandoms: Mobsterswitch - Fandom, Problem Sleuth (Webcomic)
27 Oct 2014
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Scout is really sick of having to choose between his job and his boyfriend.
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Shadows and Reflections by SelanPike
Fandoms: Problem Sleuth (Webcomic), MS Paint Adventures, MS Paint Fan Adventures
22 Mar 2014
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You walk through the town, not to assert your dominance or get any business done, but instead to listen to the word on the streets.
All you hear is the same things you’ve heard before, same things you can’t stop hearing ever since Scoff came around. Shit about how the Scoundrels ran circles around you and your Crew, got them all locked up. About how they took over the city in a matter of weeks. About how they killed the sleuths—even the Chosen Arbiter.
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Problem Sleuth examines a case of ennui, over an average work week.
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A gumshoe and a mobster walk into a bar, and everyone can play nice when there's a bottle of White Hoofbeast involved.
(Or, how Peccant Scofflaw and Snooping Scout first met.)
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Bookmark Notes:
aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
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