BLUEBUM



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    "They always insist on going down on me and I have to pretend like they’re The One who’s finally good at it. But no one’s good at it. It’s just something that doesn’t feel good.”

    Wade’s eye twitches.

    Peter glares at him. “Say it.”

    “I’m afraid I’m going to have to insist that they’re all bad at it, baby boy.”

    Or: Peter has never had a good experience getting head. Wade swears he can change his mind.

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    30 Oct 2025

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  2. Public Bookmark *

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    Peter crashes at Wade's place waiting for him to get home, only he's having a wet dream when Wade returns.

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    30 Oct 2025

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    “Where am I?” he mutters. Adrenaline is flooding through his body. His heart is beating so terribly that he can feel it inside his chest. His entire body has broken out in a cold sweat. And somehow, despite it all, his spidey-sense is dead silent. What does it know that the rest of his body doesn’t?

    “Our apartment,” says the man. He’s standing now. Peter didn’t notice when he got to his feet. “Can you tell me who you are, sweetheart?”

    Peter laughs, incredulous. He’s not exactly sure what he’s laughing at. “Peter,” he says. “Of course, I know who I am.”

    “Okay,” the man says, sounding just as concerned and careful as before. “But you don't know who I am?”

    Or: Peter gets amnesia, wiping out the last 5 years of his life. But really, how much can change in five years?

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    30 Oct 2025

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    Peter finally has a day to himself, and he decides to relax, maybe take out a couple of toys. But then Deadpool comes by and finds this remote on the counter and oh God the vibrator's still inside of him.

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    30 Oct 2025

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    When Peter can't find a way out of his class field trip to Stark Tower quite in time, his classmates (and the rest of the world) receive quite the surprise about the real family of the weird nerd they grew up with.
     

    (This is a mess guys, I'm sorry)
    *DISCLAIMER!!!!!*
    In the comics Wade is between 28-35 years old, plus the fact that he was cursed by the mistress of death to never age as well as to never die.
    Peter is ***CANONICALLY*** 28 also in the comics.
    that means they are at least the same age and at most 8 years apart
    In this fic I have made Wade somewhere around 3 years older than Peter.
    Peter is 19
    This is adult, legal, and consenting
    Don't come at me, I will fight your ass

    Language:
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    30 Oct 2025