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Summary
Seven year old Caitlyn proves that Santa Claus is not real.
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Updated Summary, 1 August, 2025
This fic has expanded far beyond its original scope, to the point that the stranded part isn't going to actually happen until closer to Chapter 30, so here's my attempt at a more accurate summary:
This is a story of Caitlyn and Vi on an Era of Exploration expedition ship to recover a mysterious plant from a remote island. Caitlyn is a talented but overlooked botanist, socially isolated from her peers. Vi is the ship's first mate with a bit of a chip on her shoulder, and an uncanny ability to be friendly without ever letting anyone close enough to be an actual friend.
This is a slo(ooo)w burn love story that embraces all the in-between, boring parts of life where relationships grow, so they're going to spend several chapters each being enemies, then friends, then finally learning to be lovers. They'll spend time together, they'll get to know one another, and their relationship will grow (in a way that I hope feels as authentic to you as it does to me) before their bond is ultimately tested.
There is an MCD, but it's not Caitlyn or Vi.
There is smut in this fic, but this is not a smut fic.
Also, I don't overuse the nickname "Cupcake."
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Inspired by League of Legends lore's The Warden's Writeups.
At SHQ, every new inmate and guard is warned about Inmate 516: An inmate with a strange, incurable bloodlust. Her behavioral problems, her predilection for powder and her obsession with certain criminals don’t seem to wane over her years of hard time served. The occasional whisper flies that perhaps she’s not as cracked as she seems... That maybe—just maybe, she’s the only unbroken one in the joint.
A warden struck out on a mission to change her. She fought and she won. They put a number on her jumpsuit, so she wrote her name on her face. They took her youth from her, but they never took her good heart.
This is the story she lived to tell, beginning from Day 0.
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Caitlyn made a study of the Noxian’s face, retook the sum of her image unmasked. Crimson hair, storm-blue eyes, the bearing of a wildfire restrained. This, the monster who’d made a mess of an unreasonable number of trained Enforcers, before their commander could react.
A world away, in a struggle for Piltover's future, Caitlyn and Vi first meet on opposing sides.
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In the fallout of the workshop explosion, tensions in the undercity erupt into a months-long uprising, quelled at last with Noxian aid. Ambessa takes in a girl who has lost everything, and shapes her to return as Zaun's hero — and Piltover's conqueror.
When a Noxus-Zaun alliance takes the city, Vi has a clear destiny laid before her. But as machinations and rebellion unfold, she must sort through her identity and grief; her ties to Vander's legacy; her loyalty to the general who took her in and gave her new purpose; and a precarious bond she develops with the Piltovan commander she herself defeated.
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Ending spoilers and character death/survival specifics are available in Chapter 1 notes
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Caitlyn is an attorney who lives and works in London with her brother Jayce. Her bakes all have to be approved by him, although he isn't a very harsh critic. Most of her bakes are inspired by memories she has of baking with her dad, Tobias.
Hailing from Kent by way of the American state of New Jersey, Vi lives with her younger sister Powder where she manages to strike a balance between her work as a self-defense instructor and her love for baking.
Vi applied for Bake Off because Powder dared her to, and not because she thinks she has a shot at winning. Caitlyn applied hoping to find new inspiration, and maybe to prove to herself that she can carry on her dad's baking traditions.
With 10 weeks in a tent in Berkshire, they both might have bitten off a bit more than they can chew.

