CrypticOath



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  1. Public Bookmark *

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    an anxious, artificial mess of a tv-headed gameshow host with deep-rooted attachment issues, an insatiable thirst for attention, and bpd meets a narcissist salesman with a sharp, brutal tongue, mysterious secrets, and a determination to grow bigger, bigger, bigger--what could possibly go wrong?

    a timeline of the messy, pre-canon spamtenna story that will only end in tragedy.

    work title and chapter titles all from the smiths songs/lyrics

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    72,473
    Chapters:
    23/23
    Comments:
    954
    Kudos:
    794
    Bookmarks:
    134
    Hits:
    18,063

    14 Aug 2025

  2. Public Bookmark 39

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    It’s only been a day since the business with Tenna in the green room. Try as he might to move on and forget about it, the incident lingers on Spamton’s mind. He knows the guy didn’t mean to hurt him. He’s not scared of Tenna. He can’t be.

    In his dreams, a cage begins to loom. There’s a chance to find a key, but is he going to take it?

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    12,071
    Chapters:
    2/2
    Comments:
    52
    Kudos:
    535
    Bookmarks:
    39
    Hits:
    4,877

    23 Jul 2025

  3. Public Bookmark *

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    Spamton accidentally falls out of the inventory after the events of Chapter 3. Alone and without anybody to help him in Castle Town, where mainly those who still know him aren't friendly to him, Spamton finds a recently-recruited television who doesn't recognize him whatsoever and chooses to use this to his advantage.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    190,243
    Chapters:
    20/21
    Comments:
    3,245
    Kudos:
    12,015
    Bookmarks:
    1,820
    Hits:
    376,334

    13 Jul 2025

  4. Public Bookmark 61

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    "Come on, [HOT STUFF!] It was a joke! You can't seriously be mad over an accident, right? It's [just a scratch]"

    Tenna looked at Spamton, feeling smaller than usual. Where he was sat, he could make direct eye contact without either of them having to break their necks like usual, yet Spamton was just looking at him half-exasperated, half something Tenna couldn't truly place down. He felt the deep gash in his screen, feeling the dead pixels forming by the minute, how his face lit up in multicolour.

    Spamton was right, though. It was meant to be a joke that just... didn't pan out the way it was meant to. He forced a wonky smile, and ignored the gnawing aching in his chest as he stood up, ready to start the show.

    -

    Or, Spamtenna toxic yaoi excerpts from how it went from bad, to worse, to the end.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    11,404
    Chapters:
    4/4
    Comments:
    78
    Kudos:
    582
    Bookmarks:
    61
    Hits:
    8,164

    01 Jul 2025

  5. Public Bookmark *

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    Hiccup is more dragon than human he likes to think. After killing the Red Death, he had spent almost all his time leading his nest and caring for dragons. The people of Berk were kinder to him, but Hiccup is wary. He keeps to himself and he works to help all the dragons that he can. He actively seeks out dragons hurt by traps.

    When he finds the dragon eye while looking for scrap he goes beyond the edges of Berk’s maps and finds the impacts of dragon hunters. And the dragon hunters begin to feel the impact of a clever Hiccup.

    Viggo becomes intrigued by the reports of a Night Fury. What happens when a more feral Hiccup comes into conflict with the Grimborns?

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    73,993
    Chapters:
    64/64
    Comments:
    1,190
    Kudos:
    1,880
    Bookmarks:
    344
    Hits:
    49,029

    24 Jun 2025