Ghost_Of_An_Avocado



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    “Uh, hello,” Ilya says when the cat rises up on its legs and stretches, back bending and paws curling down. Its ears flick and it gives him a dour sort of mwor in return. Witches have familiars, Ilya knows that. And this is a perfect spot for a familiar to be, on the stoop of the witch's house. Logic follows that the cat must be the witch's familiar.

    So he says, very politely, “Shane is expecting us,” even though he has no idea if that’s true or not.

    The cat yawns, tiny sharp teeth flashing at Ilya. Its ears flick again and then it curls up into a ball of fur, right there on the brick wall despite the fact that they’re hurtling towards the end of November and it’s fucking freezing outside.

    “Is that good or bad, do you think,” Ilya asks Seryozha in Russian, gesturing at the cat when the familiar doesn’t move again except to curl its tail over the tip of its pink nose.

    Seryozha’s phone screen flashes white in the darkness. That is a cat, he types, and Ilya scowls. It’s a fucking magical cat.

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    01 May 2026

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    The first thing you should know about time loops is that they’re really fucking hard to break. The second thing is that you can never break one in such a way that it is incapable of returning.

    The third thing you should know is that everyone around you has probably been stuck in a time loop at one point or another, and they made it out alive. This is only comforting if you’re a numbers guy, or if you’re the kind of guy who talks to others about how it feels to live the same day over and over and over and over and over and over again.

    Shame if you’re not; the most important thing you should know about breaking a time loop is that it helps to tell someone you’re trapped in one in the first place.

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    13 Apr 2026

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    After a mix-up leaves Hayden with the wrong phone for three days, he ends up learning more about Ilya Rozanov and his secret girlfriend, Jane.

    Another Hayden-Finds-Out, because we can't have too many.

    *now with the extra continuing Hayden-Rozanov friendship text threads*

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    07 Apr 2026

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    lucarozanov

    if shane hollander gets mad at me reading about him getting blasted in the ass then he can check his bank account. i know ilya would be chill with it though

    Luca Haas tries very hard to not let anyone know about his dark (read: embarrassing) past. Unfortunately, the fans are ready to let people know for him.

    Or, Luca used to run a tumblr blog for Hollanov and the internet goes wild.

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    06 Apr 2026

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    “Wait, I could totally see that,” Connors says. “She wears reading glasses and he’s, like, obsessed with them. Sometimes on the road, he calls her from the bathroom and I hear him begging her to put them on.”

    “The glasses! I heard that too.” Shit, it must be a fetish, right? She doesn’t just happen to be old. Rozy likes that she’s old.

    Or: Cliff figures out why Ilya’s keeping his Montreal girl a secret. She’s not a girl at all...she's an elderly woman. Or maybe an elderly man?

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    27 Mar 2026

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