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“Mm…” Naruto practically slumped into it.
Fuck. Okay. Good.
More than twenty years of this wasn’t bad at all.
.
Or, thanks to a seal created by Orochimaru, everybody believed Sasuke was a Beta. That was coming to an end, and Naruto seemed overly eager to help him through it.
Series
- Part 10 of SasuNaru Stories Collection <3
Bookmarked by ImNotRedRobin
04 Oct 2026
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Sasuke still thinks he might be teetering on the precipice of it all being a really good dream.
He deigns to be selfish and keep dreaming.
Series
- Part 2 of whatever you say (you got me)
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Summary
“Don’t move.” Jason whispers. “If we don’t move he won’t see us.”
Tim scrunches his nose. “That’s for a T-rex and it’s a lie. They could very well kill you even then.”
“You are shitting on my hopes and dreams, Replacement.”
“I’m not. I’m just saying —”
“Todd.” Damian calls, effectively shutting them both up, and when he gets no answer from Jason, he whimpers a sad and soft, “Drake.”
“I can't believe I'm saying this but he’s breaking my heart, dude.”
“No, don’t you dare to give in. It’s a trap,” Jason says. “It’s gotta be a trap —”
They lose both the battle and the war when Damian stops waiting for them and instead stumbles forward, almost drunkenly, and unceremoniously flops himself on Jason, full-on crying against his stomach.
“Jesus fuck, Babybat.” Jason exhales in one breath. “Alright, who do I have to kill?”
"Jason!"
(Or the one where Jason and Tim come to the Manor after a long night of patrol and they find weird new kind of life form out of this world that cries with snot and all inside the Manor's grounds. It takes them some time, because they are both dumbasses, to convince themselves that's actually their little brother crying his eyes out.)
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 9,366
- Chapters:
- 2/2
- Collections:
- 12
- Comments:
- 412
- Kudos:
- 15,212
- Bookmarks:
- 2,828
- Hits:
- 81,610
Bookmarked by ImNotRedRobin
03 Oct 2026
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“Oh no,” Tim deadpans, looking straight at the camera. “I’ve been kidnapped. Whatever shall I do.”
Tim wants to ditch the quarterly WE board meeting. Jason wants cash. There is a painfully obvious solution here.
Or; Jason kidnaps Tim for ransom whenever it's convenient. Bruce just wishes they’d both ask him for things normally, like regular people.
Series
- Part 11 of fueled by coffee, spite and kirby music
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 2,514
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 13
- Comments:
- 113
- Kudos:
- 7,268
- Bookmarks:
- 876
- Hits:
- 38,042
Bookmarked by ImNotRedRobin
03 Oct 2026
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Summary
Jason gets caught by the JLA.
Of course, he needs someone to bail him out, and Batman is the supreme authority on the Watchtower and his dad so it makes perfect sense to call him. Unfortunately, Batman is still mad about those warehouses he blew up a few weeks ago, and karma is an asshole.
Justice League, meet Brucie Wayne.
Series
- Part 8 of fueled by coffee, spite and kirby music
- Part 2 of Platinum Tier Fics (personal favourites)
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Summary
“So!” Dick says with great fanfare, throwing himself across Bruce’s designated chair with nary a care in the world.
The Justice League look on with a mix of befuddled awe, like they’ve never seen a child dressed up like a traffic light before. Which they haven't. Bruce mentally steels himself as Dick clears his throat. “Why am I here, you ask? Well, when two people love one another very, very much-”
“You’re adopted.” Bruce says.
Or; Bruce lets Dick attend a Justice League meeting on the Watchtower. Bruce has regrets.
Series
- Part 2 of fueled by coffee, spite and kirby music
- Part 1 of Platinum Tier Fics (personal favourites)
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 4,216
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 34
- Comments:
- 247
- Kudos:
- 14,911
- Bookmarks:
- 2,173
- Hits:
- 103,895
Bookmarked by ImNotRedRobin
03 Oct 2026
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Anonymous said:
Asked Batman whether he was dating Mr Wayne or if it was just a sugar baby/daddy thing. Only response I got was a stern ‘hn’ but im like 90% sure he was blushing under the cowl
[3/5 stars]Anonymous said:
I can’t put vigilantes as a reason on my insurance claims
[0/5 stars]Anonymous said:
Can confirm that Red Hood wears a second mask under his hood for some reason. He’s not bald, but he does have awful helmet hair if anyone was wondering why im only giving him four stars
[4/5 stars]A Gotham University student launches a forum website for rating the local vigilantes, mainly as a joke. As things tend to do in Gotham, it spirals out of control.
Series
- Part 3 of fueled by coffee, spite and kirby music
- Part 2 of In which there is Social Media
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 1,546
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 22
- Comments:
- 256
- Kudos:
- 10,373
- Bookmarks:
- 1,292
- Hits:
- 54,706
Bookmarked by ImNotRedRobin
03 Oct 2026
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Summary
Upon seeing the Joker trying to hold a four year old hostage in Gotham Mall, Bruce does the logical thing. Which is to beat the shit out of him.
In public, out of costume.
Gotham reacts.
Series
- Part 1 of In which there is Social Media
- Part 7 of fueled by coffee, spite and kirby music
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 3,982
- Chapters:
- 2/2
- Collections:
- 48
- Comments:
- 530
- Kudos:
- 18,026
- Bookmarks:
- 2,966
- Hits:
- 111,245
Bookmarked by ImNotRedRobin
03 Oct 2026
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101 Fancy Ways To Hide Your Secret Identity by lemonlimemadness
Fandoms: Batman - All Media Types
12 Apr 2025
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Summary
Tim is watching Brucie Wayne, himbo extraordinaire, make a fool of himself at a gala when he decides that he’d rather eat a Batmobile than do something similar.
Or; Much to Bruce’s disapproval, Tim’s method of removing suspicion of his dual identities had been by instigating a brutal, meme-worthy, long-standing social media feud with himself.
Series
- Part 13 of fueled by coffee, spite and kirby music
- Part 3 of In which there is Social Media
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Summary
During the Titans Tower debacle, Tim gets even. Jason finds out the hard way that he can use his fists all he likes, but no one can parry emotional damage.
Series
- Part 6 of fueled by coffee, spite and kirby music
- Part 3 of Platinum Tier Fics (personal favourites)
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 8,105
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 13
- Comments:
- 203
- Kudos:
- 4,693
- Bookmarks:
- 758
- Hits:
- 32,298
Bookmarked by ImNotRedRobin
03 Oct 2026
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Summary
It's always important to have your facts straight. If not, you might end up doing something pretty embarrassing.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 5,143
- Chapters:
- 2/2
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 153
- Kudos:
- 1,625
- Bookmarks:
- 252
- Hits:
- 19,184
Bookmarked by ImNotRedRobin
02 Oct 2026
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Summary
NaruSasu Body Swap Shenanigans :D
Bookmarked by ImNotRedRobin
02 Oct 2026
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Summary
Sasuke had been aware of Naruto’s obsession with him. It had bled into every aspect of his life, coming back around every time to buzz in his ear like a starved mosquito until it became so pervasive, it was impossible to ignore. But it was just now, with Naruto trembling in front of him, releasing soft, shaky breaths, his pupils blown out, that Sasuke finally understood.
Naruto wanted him. Desperately.
Bookmarked by ImNotRedRobin
01 Oct 2026
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Summary
Minato reunite with their child during the war. But not how he expect it.
Bookmarked by ImNotRedRobin
01 Oct 2026
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Summary
Naruto has always been unafraid to express his truest self, it was his greatest strength. But what will his teammates think of his latest self-discovery? Basically, Naruto's probably genderfluid but they're on a mission so he doesn't really care about that right now.
Team 7 is sent to retrieve a stolen treasure, and the mission is a success.. But Naruko and Sasuke's hands are still stuck together for the next two days.. Frustration (and contentment) ensues..
Bookmarked by ImNotRedRobin
01 Oct 2026
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Summary
Naruto Uzumaki doesn't really know how heats work. Thankfully, Sasuke is so nice that he'll show him :3
Bookmarked by ImNotRedRobin
30 Sep 2026
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Summary
It is why he’s here after all. He’s softened, after all these years. He’s never needed validation, he knows who he is, what he can do.
But Sasuke hates to admit that he is hurt, that he does need Naruto to need him, to make him understand.
“I don’t care what he said,” Naruto kisses his neck, drawing out more noises from Sasuke. “I’ll show you just how useful you are, Alpha. How worthy you are. How much you mean to me.”
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After a break up that makes him realize how much of an Alpha he's not, Sasuke comes to the one person who not only sees him as the strongest one around, but also holds every piece to his heart.
Bookmarked by ImNotRedRobin
30 Sep 2026
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Summary
Reactions from different Naruto characters.
or, in which:
society and their demands should shove it up the ass!
Series
- Part 2 of The unconventional omega
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Summary
Uzumaki Naruto really keeps up with being the most unpredictable ninja of all time
OR
I'm tired of the Bratty!Sasuke discourse when Naruto is canonically known to be sassier/bratty (who calls the sannin that could punt anyone through walls 'Baa-san???') and also, I miss feral, chalant, possessive and stronger omega naruto.
Series
- Part 1 of The unconventional omega
Bookmarked by ImNotRedRobin
30 Sep 2026
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Summary
Sasuke really was just looking out for Naruto when he came to the conclusion that he did. Honest. No selfish desires whatsoever.
Bookmarked by ImNotRedRobin
30 Sep 2026