TheAbsoluteOne



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    DoF - crackfics by

    Fandoms: Percy Jackson and the Olympians - Rick Riordan, Percy Jackson and the Olympians & Related Fandoms - All Media Types  

    18 Oct 2025

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    Eurylochos let out something between a startled chuckle and a gasp, then gave a surprisingly elegant bow for a man built like a siege engine. “Of course, my lady. I wouldn’t expect anything less.”

    Luke followed him with a growing sense of unreality.

    From suspicious near-violence to thinking all three of them were helpless maidens—when Clarisse was clearly two seconds away from exploding—was a choice.

    Patriarchy really does rot the brain, Luke thought. But hey, makes it easier to stab him if this goes south.

    Crack oneshots or what ifs related to Delusion of Fate’s universe.

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    14 Dec 2025

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    Chronologically Cursed by

    Fandoms: Percy Jackson and the Olympians & Related Fandoms - All Media Types, EPIC - Jorge Rivera-Herrans (Albums), The Odyssey - Homer  

    24 Apr 2025

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    Luke Castellan was supposed to be plotting a revolution.

    Instead, he wakes up in Ithaca—the old one. (And seriously, these idiots don’t even wear pants?!) Nice. Just ancient Greece at its worst, a suitor massacre on the horizon, and a smug god calling him “Loukas” like it’s the greatest heist he’d ever done.

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    14 Dec 2025

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    A Friendship of Storm and Mischief by

    Fandoms: Percy Jackson and the Olympians & Related Fandoms - All Media Types  

    17 Feb 2024

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    Apollo smiles, friendly and alluring. “Hey, Percy! My fav-”

    “Is he here?” Percy asks, interrupting him. The demigod is wearing that terrifying expression Poseidon has right before he starts sending tsunamis and hurricanes to torment whichever poor soul or god made the fatal mistake of pissing him off. Behind Percy, the previously clear sky and calm waves are gray and rough. Apollo smells the moisture in the air, preparing to downpour.

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    14 Dec 2025

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    Post War Parenting Conversations by

    Fandoms: Percy Jackson and the Olympians & Related Fandoms - All Media Types  

    16 Jan 2024

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    Percy snorts, before shaking his head no. “Angela was worried that Diet Coke’s threat was real. And it’s not like Athena would care if her children were killed.”

    “Percy-” Hermes starts to argue, but Percy cuts him off. It’s not the first time that Percy has ranted about Athena; his dislike (to put it mildly) of her is infamous in his social circle, especially after his break-up with Annabeth.

    “Look, I know you care about your kids, and most of the other gods do, and you’re all working harder to be better parents. But while this is a good step for most of you, it’s nothing when you consider that Athena has been sending her children to die by their greatest phobia for millennia.” Percy snaps. “Gifts and visits and dancing don't even begin to fix any of that.”

    None of it was fair, and Percy hated Athena with an unquenchable vengeance for the way she treated Annabeth. Even now, two years after they had broken up, Percy’s anger at the war goddess was an unquenchable monster that lived within him. Annabeth, for all her flaws, was a worthy hero and had been a good friend and she deserved better than Athena’s neglect, abuse and cruelty.

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    14 Dec 2025

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    Blue Food by

    Fandoms: Percy Jackson and the Olympians & Related Fandoms - All Media Types  

    09 Jan 2024

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    Hermes studies the newspaper article in front of him, from Olympus Weekly. To no-one’s surprise it features the most popular demigod of current times: Percy Jackson. It’s quite short and wholesome for a piece on Percy Jackson. It talks about his love of blue food. However, the article neglects to disclose why Percy likes blue food so much.

    “But Hermes, this is our chance! We can just stop by for a quick minute to ask!” Martha says eagerly.

    Hermes glares at her. “No.”

    “Please?” Martha asks.

    “No.”

    “Please with a rat on top?” George asks.

    “No.”

    “Please with a blue rat on top?” Martha asks.

    “For the love of – fine.” Hermes caves in. The lengths he goes to for his snakes. They're lucky he loves them so much.

    “That’s the power of blue food.” Martha tells George gleefully under her breath. George nods in amazement. Hermes rolls his eyes. It’s a losing battle.

    Aka. Hermes crashes Percy's morning out with Mrs. O'Leary.

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    14 Dec 2025