TheWholeLemon
Recent works
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Soap Operetta by TheWholeLemon for martsonmars
Fandoms: Carry On | Simon Snow Series - Rainbow Rowell
26 Oct 2025
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Summary
Operetta is a form of theatre and a genre of light opera....It is lighter than opera in terms of its music, orchestral size, and length of the work. Apart from its shorter length, the operetta is usually of a light and amusing character. The subject matter may portray "lovers' spats, mistaken identities, sudden reversals of fortune, and glittering parties." It sometimes also includes satirical commentaries.
In other words, Simon goes to work at Now Next Industries.
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The Dialectic of Strength and Pleasure Throughout the Ages: Why You Should Have Sex With Me Without Your Cage On by TheWholeLemon for facewithoutheart
Fandoms: The Mars House - Natasha Pulley
08 Oct 2025
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Summary
The first time Gale suggested it, January was immediately opposed—his exact words were, “No way in hell.” But Gale’s nothing if not persistent.
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Six of One, Half a Dozen of the Other by TheWholeLemon
Fandoms: Carry On | Simon Snow Series - Rainbow Rowell
08 Sep 2025
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Summary
Or, Six Times Simon Said "Hey," and One Time He Didn't
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When That Light Hits the Sky by TheWholeLemon
Fandoms: Carry On | Simon Snow Series - Rainbow Rowell
13 Aug 2025
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Summary
Simon’s in his thirties and suddenly unemployed. His old job had its downsides, but he felt useful, full of purpose—and he didn’t have to worry about pesky things like making more than one friend, or minding his personal safety, or even picking out his own clothes (the uniform might have been the best part). Now he’s adrift, and he can’t even talk about it—revealing even an ex-Batman’s secret identity comes with some pretty hefty penalties, after all. But that shouldn’t be a problem—who’s he gonna tell, anyway?
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It's Tool Time! by facewithoutheart, P_pato_roldnart, TheWholeLemon for RaenyDay
Fandoms: Carry On | Simon Snow Series - Rainbow Rowell
05 Jun 2025
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Summary
Simon and Penny’s YouTube channel, Tool Time, centers around home improvements to make your flat feel more like home. They’re thrilled to land a sponsorship with Malcolm Grimm’s well-known brand, Watford Tool, but Penny’s having second thoughts when their (sexy?) brand rep is forced to inform her that yes, the uniform crop tops and short shorts with the Watford Tool logo on it are not a joke. How will they resolve this before the episode airs on June 5??
Recent series
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vroom vroom-verse by cutestkillastrations (cutekilla), facewithoutheart, TheWholeLemon
Fandom: Carry On Series - Rainbow Rowell, Carry On | Simon Snow Series - Rainbow Rowell, Simon Snow & Related Fandoms
08 Oct 2024
- Words:
- 9,080
- Works:
- 4
- Bookmarks:
- 10
Recent bookmarks
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Like a Punch to the Face by facewithoutheart
Fandoms: Carry On Series - Rainbow Rowell, Simon Snow & Related Fandoms
10 Sep 2022
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Summary
The one where Simon sees Baz dancing in a club and rethinks everything he's ever known about attraction. Also the one where Simon gets punched in the face on his birthday and it ends up being the best night of his life.
Bookmarked by TheWholeLemon
02 Nov 2025
Bookmarker's Notes
simon/pseudo-simon takes a punch for baz (they were ROOMMATES!)
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Straight to Video by cutekilla for TheWholeLemon
Fandoms: Carry On | Simon Snow Series - Rainbow Rowell
30 Oct 2025
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Summary
“Those things will kill you,” Baz growled after him, but the door had already closed. Not that it mattered, since what Baz really meant was “I’ll kill you” and Dev certainly knew that already given the particular video shop patron he’d just dumped in Baz’s lap. The one and only (unfairly attractive) customer Baz had demanded he never be made to serve at all.
Not because this customer was a heathen who never rewound, or a meathead who only rented terrible movies, though Baz was nearly certain after several weeks of careful monitoring that he was both of these things. The actual problem was the way this boy’s broad shoulders looked in the uniform (a slightly too small white dress shirt with a green bowtie) he wore to his job working at the Safeway down at the other end of the Watford Retail Park. Maybe his adorable freckles were part of it, too. And that little hollow right above his shirt collar where his jaw met his throat. And the way his arse looked in his cheap polyester work trousers. And—
Okay no, actually, the problem was that Baz was completely gay.
Bookmarked by TheWholeLemon
31 Oct 2025
Bookmarker's Notes
90s historical au featuring obsolete media, obscure references, inept flirting, and the sexiest, most adorable sad/angry boys. i could not possible rec this fic more.
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Summary
“I need an audience with Aubrey Gale,” Professor Shang said.
Senator Shang frowned. “You need an audience with Aubrey Gale?”
“Yes. A private one.”
The House Shang heir and senator, Professor Shang’s Apollo, pulled a face. “Why?”
“Does it matter? Come on, please? Do your strings-pulling politics thing. Tell them it’s urgent. Tell them I saw their halo results and I think they might be dying of some horrible brain problem thing.”
“I wish they were dying of some horrible brain problem thing,” the senator grumbled.
In summary: Professor Shang figures it out.
Series
- Part 1 of the mars house post-canon
Bookmarked by TheWholeLemon
25 Sep 2025
Bookmarker's Notes
post canon, blushing, nicknames, perfectly satisfying.
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Summary
There's a wormhole in Watford and the students find a very juvenile way to use it. Baz is a grumpy old man about it.
Baz withholds kisses from Simon and basically makes him insane with lust. *this takes place in a bubble, Pre Carry On if you will, in my head the boys are 18, but you do you ;) *Bookmarked by TheWholeLemon
23 Sep 2025
Bookmarker's Notes
“Baz withholds kisses from Simon and basically makes him insane with lust.” fuck or die/spin the bottle/all the kisses
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Summary
She’s probably looking for him right now. As I pick up the shattered pieces of my heart off the forest floor. She’ll approach him, acting shy and sweet. He’ll quirk a perfect eyebrow at her and she’ll swoon. How could she not? He probably practices it in the mirror. Twat.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 5,867
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 46
- Kudos:
- 521
- Bookmarks:
- 74
- Hits:
- 4,352
Bookmarked by TheWholeLemon
21 Sep 2025
Bookmarker's Notes
“Tell me, when you fuck her, are either of you thinking of anything other than me?”