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Draco Malfoy is not an owl, really he isn’t. He simply assumes the shape of one on occasion when he wants to find a bit of privacy—a goal entirely thwarted because Harry Potter doesn’t understand you can’t just grab any old bird from the Owlery and force it to send your missives and deliver your packages.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 66,820
- Chapters:
- 10/10
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 389
- Kudos:
- 6,408
- Bookmarks:
- 1,523
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Bookmarked by dragonli
28 Dec 2025
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The Courting by the Pureblood Who Only Has Five Milligrams of Romantic Intelligence and Thinks He’s Real Smooth by hiimcibee for Im_a_bird
Fandoms: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
26 Jul 2020
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Draco could grab Potter and shove him into a stall before proceeding to suck his soul out of his dick, but secretly, deep down, in the part of Draco that he will never admit to anyone, he is (everyone pauses to shudder) a romantic. Potter is not someone Draco wants a one-off with. Potter is — Draco’s beloved!
So Draco decides to boldly go where no one has gone before: to put himself through scrutiny; their friends’ teasing and pranks; unsound romantic advice from a house-elf; wearing pretty clothes; all to try and win Potter’s heart through courtship.
(An unnamed ginger bastard can be heard yelling from afar: “This is actually a detailed guide on how not to court someone!”)
But who cares about the opinions of redheads? Literally no one.
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The Four Ds of Apparition (or: Destination, Determination, Deliberation, and Dicks) by eidheann, firethesound_HP_archive
Fandoms: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
26 Jul 2015
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After transferring to the Apparition Department, Harry's life becomes one big dick joke. And all his friends are arseholes. So is Malfoy, but what else is new? AKA Harry Potter and the
eighteentwenty dicks.Series
- Part 1 of Dick Chicken
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Narcissa was a pureblood supremacist.
Narcissa had a Muggle friend.
These things were both true.Also:
It’s fifth year for Harry Potter, and Malfoy’s eleven-year-old cousin has just started at Hogwarts. When Harry begins to suspect that the girl is actually Muggleborn, he can’t rest until he finds out what Malfoy is really up to.
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Draco turns out to be a surprisingly good “big brother” and Harry can’t look away. This is a Hogwarts era slow burn with a spotlight on the complicated Malfoy family. Featuring joint detentions, tea parties, one detention tea party, and several very flawed Malfoys who still really love each other. The fic begins with childhood, but most of the story takes place at Hogwarts during Harry and Draco’s fifth and sixth years.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 81,407
- Chapters:
- 18/18
- Comments:
- 517
- Kudos:
- 1,949
- Bookmarks:
- 529
- Hits:
- 42,171
Bookmarked by dragonli
25 Dec 2025
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All Our Secrets Laid Bare by firethesound_HP_archive
Fandoms: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
23 Feb 2014
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Over the six years Draco Malfoy has been an Auror, four of his partners have turned up dead. Harry Potter is assigned as his newest partner to investigate just what is going on.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 149,549
- Chapters:
- 16/16
- Comments:
- 3,800
- Kudos:
- 52,300
- Bookmarks:
- 16,239
- Hits:
- 1,469,838
Bookmarked by dragonli
25 Dec 2025
