dumpsterdiva
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Keith’s a good noodle™ who just wants to watch a movie in an empty theater. He doesn’t deserve some motormouth asshole interrupting his peace and quiet. Or that guy dumping popcorn on his head. Or all his idiotic jokes. Or his kinda cute smile. Or the free packets of Sour Patch Kids. And he definitely doesn’t deserve the fact that he’s starting to enjoy his company…
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What do you do when you pick your rival in Secret Santa?
Obviously, embark on a stealth mission to find out his interests and get him the best possible present and prove to him that you're better once and for all.
What could go wrong?
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Keith’s mouth hung open for a few seconds before he stammered, “D-do you really mean that?”
Lance looked a bit sheepish as he said, “I… It’s crazy, right? I mean, it’s way too soon. You know I was kidding.”
Keith straightened up. “Well, I’m not. Marry me.”
“What?!”
“You heard me, you coward. Marry me.”
“That’s the worst proposal ever!”
“Worse than you threatening me with marriage so I would stop talking about how amazing you are?”
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Tbh all I want for Christmas is a gay Christmas romcom but since Hollywood can't give me that I guess I'll have to give it to myself. Except I took out all the unnecessary hetero drama. Ya know, just two dudes being guys. Just two guys being dudes. And giving each other makeovers because it's Christmas. And saying cheesy things to each other cause it's Christmas. And giving each other lots of snuggles and kisses cause it's Christmas.
BOY I SURE DO LOVE ME A HEALTHY ESTABLISHED RELATIONSHIP.
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Everyone has something they’re not good at. For Lance, that’s mechanics. For Hunk, that’s flying. For Keith, that’s staying calm. With the pressures of an intergalactic war starting to eat away at them, they go to each other for help, hoping to improve themselves. But maybe the answers they’re looking for aren’t the answers they need.
For The Primary Big Bang (psst there's cool art inside!!!)
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Recipe for this fic:
1 peaceful morning jog in the park
1 auto-mechanic hothead keith
1 soccer player sinamonroll™ lance
2 cups mutual pining
A dash of angst
All the sugar in the world
Way too many bad pick-up lines
And a burn so slow you could slow roast a whole Kaltenecker
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In the aftermath of Spring Break, while Hawkins tries to piece itself back together and Eddie recovers from his near death stupidity, a federal agent turns up in Hawkins to solve a fifteen year old missing persons case and Steve learns about family.
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Bookmarked by dumpsterdiva
12 Sep 2025
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Eddie almost dies a virgin, which is mortifying. He’s rescued from certain death by Steve Harrington, which is infinitely worse. King Steve, who is not actually a douche, who is stalwart and brave and a whole lot hairier than he was last summer, carries Eddie’s ravaged body out of the Upside Down despite his own injuries. Eddie, clinging to consciousness by the edge of his fingernails, doesn’t even get to enjoy it.
It’s the summer of 1986. Eddie has some new scars, some new friends, and the same old embarrassing crush on Steve Harrington. When Steve gets curious about gay sex, who in all of Hawkins is better equipped to teach him?
Someone who's not a secret virgin, maybe. Hindsight's 20-20.
Bookmarked by dumpsterdiva
31 Aug 2025
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Summary
Steve wakes up one morning with something... missing, and something else in its place. Eddie's a virgin. They make an arrangement.
This is a funny, sweet, sexy story about an idiots to lovers situation, where I've gone out of my way to avoid angst at all costs. It's crack taken seriously, please enjoy ❤️
((May change the series name when I think up a better one. I hope it's clear how ironic this one is lmao))
- Words:
- 111,642
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- 3
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- 142
Bookmarked by dumpsterdiva
30 Aug 2025
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Because once a week, he had the house entirely to himself from nine am to eight at night while he had his usual day off at the library and Robin was in class all day (and Eddie was on tour). He didn’t need the run of it, of course, because Robin would actually kill him if she found out he was engaging in sex acts in the kitchen — but it was nice to know he could be, like, loud and shift if he needed to.
(That, actually, might have been the only other thing Robin judged him for, but, in his defense, he grew up alone in a big ass house — he never really had to learn to be quiet.)
So he took advantage of it, and put on some pretty clothes and imagined some guy railing him in them.
In which Steve has a fantasy. Couple of 'em, in fact.
Bookmarked by dumpsterdiva
20 Aug 2025
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Bookmarked by dumpsterdiva
12 Aug 2025