elpsycongruent



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  1. Rec *

    The chips are set to fall by

    Fandoms: Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid  

    26 Apr 2026

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    Summary

    At the 2017 All Star Weekend, Ilya takes fate into his own hands to produce at least one out MLH player by the end of the season. Thus begins his part-time side hustle as community organizer, mastermind, and Commander-in-Chief of the Gay Hockey Army.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
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    Chapters:
    27/?
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    19 Mar 2026

    Bookmarker's Notes

    “No! God, no!” The rookie exclaims, “Not that there’s anything wrong with that. My roommate is gay… But god. No.”

    “You have roommates?” Ilya cocks his head. “Your contract is like… one zillion dollars.”

    “Yeah, just the one. He’s my best friend, we’ve lived together since high school.” Hmm.

    It’s ok. The kid would have been a backup for Buffalo, and they aren’t about to win any cups.

    A week later, Ilya receives a social media DM saying his conversation got the rookie thinking and, wouldn't you know, he just finished banging his live-in best friend. He quickly agrees to the cup deal when Ilya proposes it and becomes #25. The roommate also DMs Ilya to thank him.

    Ilya can’t be… creating gays, can he?

    ---

    Pike: Shane just walked me through all the ways you kept it private
    Pike: he also thinks you put all this together for him.

    Ilya: I did.

    Pike: man don’t make me like you
    Pike: I don’t want that.

     

    Council of (Mostly) Straight Elders group chat

    Marly: why isn’t Pike talking at all today

    Ilya: Hollander was at his house
    Ilya: and Pike is mad at me 🤣

    Hayes: thank god
    Hayes: can we say it now??

    Vaughan: oh fuck yeah

    Marly: I’m not going to be the first one to say it

    Pike: ???? All of you!?
    Pike: how????

    ---

    “So you're a mob wife.” Yuna says matter-of-factly. Before Shane can object, she turns to Ilya, “You need a... mob mom. Because I agree, you’ll burn out. You need to delegate.”

    That's what they were hoping she'd say.

    ---

    “You are actually proposing to me in a bathroom, with your lawyer and fucking... Kowalski here.” It’s not a question, and Shane sighs as he realizes his answer would never be ‘no,’ no matter how the question was posed. “Wait a second... how is this not the weirdest time we’ve had in a Las Vegas bathroom?” Cooper looks wildly uncomfortable, and Shane realizes what he’s said. “No! Sorry! It wasn’t like that!”

    “—was exactly like that.” Ilya helpfully amends. Shane wishes he could turn himself into liquid and be poured down the sink drain, even before Ilya lowers his voice to ask, “Are you asking me to get on one knee, on this filthy bathroom floor—”

    “—Ok!” Lee claps his hands, “We’ll just go. And maybe guard the door? I don’t know.” Kowalski sheepishly appears from the stall.

    “Kowalski, I will not make death threats in front of my lawyer.” Ilya says, pointedly looking at Shane and then back. Kowalski nods frantically and follows Lee out.

  2. Rec *

    Shall We Talk About Home? by

    Fandoms: Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid, Game Changers | Heated Rivalry - All Media Types  

    09 Apr 2026

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    Summary

    “My boyfriend thinks I’m an idiot,” Ilya says. "Well, not really but a bit, maybe.”

    “Your boyfriend?” Sandra, the queer studies professor sits down, hard.

    “Yes, he thinks it is not smart to say faggot in the locker room when you are locked in the closet and Russia has the keys.”

    Ilya had been talking about himself when he’d said it. Making a joke. Sailing a little close to the wind, sick of listening to the background hum of homophobic bullshit. But someone had been filming. The video went viral. The Raiders panicked under the terrible PR. Now he was here.

    Sent to Queer Studies 101 to appease twitter. Because he’d been cancelled. For being a homophobe. If was fucking ridiculous.

    He turns to the professor. “So, can you help me take on Putin and NHL at same time or I need more advanced class for this?”

    Plus Chapter 2 – Social media chapter. Once they've been outed, Ilya gets to demand an apology from twitter.

    Language:
    English
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    5,579
    Chapters:
    2/2
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    19 Apr 2026

  3. Rec *

    The Hottest Cold War by

    Fandoms: Heated Rivalry (TV)  

    01 Apr 2026

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    Once is a mistake, twice is terrible judgment, three times is enemy action. After four times, it might just be something worse.

    OR

    What if Scott hooked up with Ilya during the summer of 2010 entirely by accident, then kept doing it on purpose.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    116,915
    Chapters:
    10/10
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    17 Apr 2026

    Bookmarker's Notes

    NYTY: This is a very stupid argument. I'm going to go for a run.

    BH: Say hello to your smoothie man for me. Do not talk about murder!

    One Hour Later

    NYTY: Read that one too late. Talked about murder a lot. It worked out though. He basically told me he was into guys and he's coming to my game tonight. You don't think anyone will notice him using my seats, right? He's bringing a friend.

    BH: Should be fine. I give my seats away to random people all the time and no one cares.

    NYTY: You do?

    BH: Sometimes I do not have cash for tips.

    NYTY: Your mind is a strange place.

    ---

    "Okay," Scott said gently. "Did you have a good time?"

    The look Hollander gave him lived in the extra vowel between hunted and haunted.

    "Sure."

  4. Rec *

    #noticing by

    Fandoms: Heated Rivalry (TV)  

    29 Dec 2025

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    Summary

    “And this is Svetlana! You guys have a fun hockey connection. She’s BFFs with—ooh. What’s his name again, babe?”

    “Ilya Rozanov,” says Svetlana. Feeling virtuous about it, she offers her hand first. “Don’t tell him I said you have the best hands in the league.”

    Shane’s face is rigid. “Um. I won’t?”

    “Thank you,” she says gravely. “You have saved a life.” Rose laughs, stroking Shane’s arm, and he suddenly remembers Svetlana’s hand is hanging. He takes it limply and disposes of it quick. His eyes look a little wild.

    Language:
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    1/1
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    17 Apr 2026

    Bookmarker's Notes

    The bartender slides over the Plain Jane. Svetlana runs the stirrer around the glass.

    After the initial mingled wave of shock and pity subsides, her thoughts, in order, are:

    1. Only Ilya could reach this level of earth-shattering stupidity. She shouldn’t even be surprised.
    2. Shane Hollander is a jealous asshole. She likes him a lot.
    3. It doesn’t appear as though Shane utilized any of this to ask Ilya for tips on improving his backhand. Bit of a waste, if you ask her.

  5. Rec *

    Articles of Affection by

    Fandoms: Heated Rivalry (TV)  

    07 Jan 2026

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    Summary

    Shane has a system. It includes a forgotten sweater.

    Language:
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    17 Apr 2026