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  1. Tags
    Summary

    аромат свежих персиков, яркое солнце, морозный воздух, тонкие белые перья, мягкие волосы. золото, вкус мёда с привкусом горечи, жжёный сахар, сломанные прикосновения, чистая кожа, родинки и веснушки, взгляд глаза в глаза. нежность на кончиках пальцев, слёзы в уголках глаз. желание быть рядом и не отпускать. горестные улыбки, разговоры о чувствах, падение на глубину. соприкосновение душ. страх быть оставленным. «я впервые был тихим и бережным». боль вперемешку с жаром желания. «ты –совершенство». вкус сахара и соли. карамель. укусы в шею, пустой тёмный номер гостиницы, скрипящий пол и белые простыни. «it's a bad idea». ветер, красивые улицы, русская речь и акцент, шёпот, смешанные голоса. осторожность и бережность. раненые сердца. царапающее любопытство, эмоциональность и восхищение.
    «ты – мой покой», аквамариновые глаза, молнии и туман. ненависть к себе. любовь к себе. глупые молитвы. стихотворные строчки, старые мифы, звуки гитары, ускоренное сердцебиение. страх ранить друг друга.

    Language:
    Русский
    Words:
    46,327
    Chapters:
    12/?
    Kudos:
    7
    Bookmarks:
    1
    Hits:
    101
  2. Tags
    Summary

    — …вот как понять, что ты влюбился?

    Королёв чувствовал тяжесть на своём плече и осознал именно в тот момент, что он, судя по всему, втюрился. Просто отказывался себе в этом признаться.

    — Наверное… ты просто это осознаёшь? — пробормотал Королёв, — Как лампочка над головой. «Пуф», и всё.

    [русреал ау, где Кроули - Антон Королёв, который готов сделать всё, чтобы перевестись на факультет астрономии, а Азирафаэль — Серёжа Феллин, в которого Королёв так невовремя влюбился]

    Language:
    Русский
    Words:
    46,505
    Chapters:
    14/?
    Comments:
    3
    Kudos:
    12
    Hits:
    247
  3. Tags
    Summary

    В попытках найти свое место в живописи Николай переезжает в Петербург по совету Сигмы и сталкивается с «духом» этого своеобразного города.
    (In his attempts to find his place in painting, Nikolai moves to Saint Petersburg on Sigma’s advice and comes face to face with the “spirit” of this distinctive city).

    Language:
    Русский
    Words:
    96,270
    Chapters:
    28/?
    Comments:
    2
    Kudos:
    22
    Bookmarks:
    2
    Hits:
    409
  4. Tags
    Summary

    Ilya Rozanov loves Shane Hollander to the moon and stars, and his proposal makes Ilya the happiest man in the world. But he realizes that after the marriage he'll definitely never be able to visit his mother's grave again. Shane Hollander is being a very good partner, so he suggests they secretly fly to Moscow together, so Ilya could get closure with his part (and truly wants to understand Ilya better). And Ilya agrees,
    or the adventures of the almost-married Hollander-Rozanov family in Moscow.

    Only epilogue left! It will be published 26.04.2026. I will be happy to see your kudos!

    The work is written in both Russian and English, all the dialogues are written in the language in which it occurs. Yes, Ilya sometimes addresses Shane in Russian. And viceversa. And many of them sometimes jump back and forth. For me this is important because language is an important part of consciousness. But do not be scared, every phrase has a translation!

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    50,799
    Chapters:
    8/9
    Comments:
    6
    Kudos:
    50
    Bookmarks:
    27
    Hits:
    1,816
  5. Tags
    Summary

    Yana Merzlikina, just barely a graduate police officer of the Ministry of Internal Affairs, finds herself feeling a little overwhelmed with everything with her life. Moving to a place far from home and up in the cold, wintery city of Serebrograd, the shy and socially awkward woman finds it difficult to connect with her colleagues at work or anyone, really. Which doesn't help much, since Yana is madly in love with Yarina Valentinova, her pregnant coworker in the administrative division.

    But much to her luck, Yana finds herself personally invited by that same beautiful woman to spend some much-needed leisure time at their apartment over the weekend. It seems like Yana might actually have a chance to connect with her crush and savor her pleasant company, maybe even become friends with her. Only, that Yarina wants to be more than just friends with Yana. Fulfilling Yana's wish in the most unexpected way.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    13,150
    Chapters:
    1/3
    Comments:
    1
    Bookmarks:
    1
    Hits:
    40
  6. Tags
    Summary

    It is an unremarkable, dreary March morning in Ottawa when Ilya Rozanov’s life swiftly burns to ashes around him. Ilya had intended to spend the rare morning off of training sleeping off the lingering exhaustion from the seemingly endless stretch of away games as long as Anya would allow.

    Instead, it is barely past six in the morning when armed agents pound on his front door.

    (Or, a remix of the FanMail incident.)

    completed fic, updates every thursday

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    13,031
    Chapters:
    2/5
    Comments:
    30
    Kudos:
    204
    Bookmarks:
    68
    Hits:
    1,933
  7. Tags
    Summary

    After years of secrecy, longing, and learning how to exist without hiding, Shane and Ilya choose each other—this time in plain sight.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    877
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Kudos:
    52
    Bookmarks:
    1
    Hits:
    766
  8. Tags
    Summary

    О том, как живётся трансам на Руси. На самом деле просто веселая работа, повествующая о принятии себя и попытке найти свой уголок в этом жестоком мире, где кажется, будто безопасности не осталось совсем.

    Алиса — обычная школьница в небольшом городке современной России. Вокруг неё происходят глобальные перемены, но она не смотрит телевизор, не сидит в соцсетях. Живёт себе свою жизнь спокойно, день за днём, побаивается людей и, как-то так вышло, что ни с кем уже давно не общается близко. Однако череда (не)удачных решений и ситуаций затягивает её в круговорот событий :)

    Экстремизм — это,всё же, от слова Экстрим. И куда же судьба нас приведет...

    Language:
    Русский
    Words:
    1,225
    Chapters:
    2/?
    Kudos:
    2
    Hits:
    21
  9. Tags
    Summary

    Yuri Plisetsky. Known as the Russian punk skater with an attitude that can drive people away. His only family, his grandpa, Nikolai Plisetsky. Since he was a child he was raised by him. So how could he be calm when his grandpa is taken away from him and is put into this new family? Especially with Yuuri Katsuki!?

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    77,783
    Chapters:
    45/45
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    10
    Kudos:
    111
    Bookmarks:
    26
    Hits:
    4,867
  10. Tags
    Summary

    Newly married and thrust into life at the Romanian court, Nicholas of Romania and Princess Natalie Paley must learn to live not only with each other, but with the weight of unresolved grief, expectations, and a union born of necessity as much as affection. Court politics prove no less ruthless than those they left behind, and Nicholas soon discovers that love offers little protection against the ever-present shadow of his brother Carol, waiting abroad for the right moment to reclaim power, as well as Natalia's past.

    Meanwhile, Vladimir finds himself drawn to Romania more often than expected, under the pretext of family visits that quickly become something else. Old feelings resurface where they should not, and the line between restraint and inevitability grows thinner with every meeting.

    For Irina, marriage offers no refuge. When a devastating revelation shatters what little illusion remained, her union with Feodor becomes a façade, carefully maintained for appearances alone. Turning away from court life, she dedicates herself entirely to the creation of a new hospital, finding in purpose and service a form of fulfillment she never anticipated—and a freedom she had not known she was seeking.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    37,403
    Chapters:
    15/?
    Comments:
    34
    Kudos:
    22
    Bookmarks:
    1
    Hits:
    426
  11. Tags
    Summary

    A Rozanov like Grigori or Alexei commands attention. Inspires respect. Shows competency and strength in the face of adversity. Doesn’t shy away from agressivity or ambition or ruthlessness.
    On the ice, Ilya manages to attain that ideal. Off it, not so much.
    “Но тут я слышу о скандале в Америке,” (“But then, I hear about a scandal in America,”) continues Grigori in a measured tone. Deliberately casual. “О вас.” (“About you.”)
    Ilya juts his chin stubbornly, holding his head as high as his father’s. He can’t show shame. He can’t broadcast such weakness when it’s exactly what Grigori expects of him. But no matter how hard Ilya tries, the man smells it like a shark smells blood, and his teeth always find their mark.

    ***

    Ilya gets caught in a twisted relationship with one of the Boston Raiders' assistant coaches right after immigrating from Russia at 18 years old. This delays, complicates and somehow simplifies his future relationship with Shane Hollander.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    7,078
    Chapters:
    3/?
    Comments:
    49
    Kudos:
    113
    Bookmarks:
    35
    Hits:
    1,907
  12. Tags
    Summary

    Ilya touches him, thumbs against that same patch of freckles he’d admired a thousand times before.

    On a summer’s day in Moscow however, Ilya’s different. He’s careful, alert, and distant.

    “I’d gladly take the bullets a thousand times over, but you shouldn’t have to. Shane…” He lets out a soft sigh and shakes his head. “I don’t wanna live in a world where you’re out there taking a bullet for me.”

    Ilya makes one last trip to Moscow, Shane insists on coming along, and they're both hit with some hard lessons about home, love, and sacrifice.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    18,694
    Chapters:
    4/?
    Comments:
    11
    Kudos:
    111
    Bookmarks:
    31
    Hits:
    3,390
  13. Tags
    Summary

    Alena never thought she would take up writing. But when the work turns out to be more challenging than she expected, Tanya enters her life—free-spirited, lively, and caring. Could something more than just collaboration develop between them?

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    17,969
    Chapters:
    11/13
    Kudos:
    3
    Hits:
    44
  14. Tags
    Summary

    Алёна и не думала, что когда-либо займётся писательством. Когда работа оказывается сложнее, чем она ожидала, в её жизни появляется Таня — свободная, яркая и заботливая. Сможет ли между ними возникнуть нечто большее, чем просто сотрудничество?

    Language:
    Русский
    Words:
    15,303
    Chapters:
    11/13
    Hits:
    21
  15. Tags
    Summary

    таких будет тысячи, миллионы и тысячи миллионов.

    Language:
    Русский
    Words:
    757
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Hits:
    6
  16. Tags
    Summary

    Irina Volkova. Raised in the impoverished streets of Volgograd. Recruited by Makarov at seventeen.

    By twenty‑four, she’s a trained operative — his second‑in‑command, and his favourite dog to let loose.

    When 141 finds her on the brink of death in an abandoned stairwell, they already know exactly who she is. And exactly what they need from her.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    800
    Chapters:
    1/?
    Kudos:
    7
    Bookmarks:
    2
    Hits:
    60
  17. Tags
    Summary

    Twila goes looking for some new music. Ivanna might have something for her.

    ______________________

    She palms her paperback again, ready to sink into a story she knows almost better than her own. But a flash of color catches at the corner of her eye and she raises her head without thinking. It takes her longer than it should to process what she sees.

    The woman is all tousled blonde curls and wide green eyes with an even wider grin. She’s wearing an insane patchwork coat with fuzzy fur cuffs and a red t-shirt with…something written on it. Her high-waisted flare Levis cinch in at her waist just so. Ivanna has never seen someone so American in her life. 

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    11,478
    Chapters:
    8/15
    Comments:
    30
    Kudos:
    36
    Bookmarks:
    6
    Hits:
    435
  18. Tags
    Summary

    An untranslatable Russian word - Vladimir Nabokov describes it best: "No single word in English renders all the shades of toska. At its deepest and most painful, it is a sensation of great spiritual anguish, often without any specific cause. At less morbid levels it is a dull ache of the soul, a longing with nothing to long for, a sick pinning, a vague restlessness, mental throes, yearning. In particular cases it may be the desire for somebody or something specific, nostalgia, love-sickness. At the lowest level it grades into ennui boredom."

    ***

    Irina Rozanova missed Russia. The cold bit her skin with an addicting kind of pain, one that was dulled by cigarettes and sharpened again with hunger pains as her father, Andrei Rozanov, again lost his money to coke. Canada was fine, it was cold, but a different kind of cold, one that didn't bite as hard. Her Uncles Shane and Ilya were always kind and made sure there was food on the table for her after her dreaded Hockey practice with that bitch Ruby Pike. Irina was grateful, but she wished she was happier.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    31,213
    Chapters:
    11/20
    Comments:
    80
    Kudos:
    134
    Bookmarks:
    36
    Hits:
    3,499
  19. Tags
    Summary

    she was trained to kill before she learned to speak. Raised in the shadows of the Red Room, her name was never hers- only a weapon, a whisper, a warning. Now she's escaped but freedom doesn't mean peace. Not when your past weights as heavy as steel.

    or

    The plan was to kill the Black Widow, not to bringt her home on a random tuesday like a cat you found on the street. The Plan didn't work out.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    7,878
    Chapters:
    13/?
    Comments:
    45
    Kudos:
    88
    Bookmarks:
    17
    Hits:
    2,105
  20. Tags
    Summary

    Ilya once felt free only in Moscow’s underground queer clubs until he left it all behind for hockey, for an escape and something safer than an increasingly hostile Russia. Years later, the Olympics bring him back and now Shane is there.

    What if "Not Now Hollander" and "We are nothing" was one of the best things that happened to Hollanovs early relationship?
    What if they are both up against something far greater than the impossibility of their relationship?
    What does fear, real, state-sanctioned fear and violence do to love? What happens when repression isn’t abstract, but present in every movement, every glance, every risk taken?
    What if Joe the figureskater, Leah, and Max are going to change lives and an unexpected Russian queer in exile becomes Ilyas fairy godmother?

    Shane arrives in Sochi 2014 focused only on the game. He doesn’t see the danger. He doesn’t listen when Ilya says no, but is then forced to open his eyes through events he has no control over. When Shane stumbles into the reality of violence against queer people, his world shifts.
    And somewhere, far from Russia that is no longer a home, Ilya searches for a way back to trust and back to Shane.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    13,990
    Chapters:
    4/?
    Comments:
    26
    Kudos:
    35
    Bookmarks:
    16
    Hits:
    668

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