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In 2020, a month before I-LAND filming starts, Euijoo presents. Almost three years later, he's appointed the leader of &TEAM. The biggest obstacle in his path should, by all means, be the language barrier. It likely would have been, were he honest from the start.
Or: You can walk and talk like a duck all you want, but you'll still get people shouting goose in your ear. Even with your green-painted feathers, you'll have to give chase around the circle with everyone on the playground watching and waiting to see if you can catch up.
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Later, he’ll think of the easy way he intertwines his legs with Hanbin's. It will feel a bit like mockery that this comes so naturally to him, that he can perform something so human as sharing warmth despite the frigid, empty death he's comprised of. But he will know with a deep, visceral certainty that he will kill for Hanbin. He will reach into the gaping maw that is his chest and rip out the heart there—blackened and rotted and small—but still beating. He will be the monster that the sectors and his birth coven in Fujian always knew he was and he will be glad because him being a monster may be the only thing that can save them.
Zhang Hao is halfway, somewhat, almost a member of the best coven he's ever known.
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- Part 1 of with my hands out
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This is what it feels like to live, he thinks as the lights blind him and sweat stains his shirt, as thousands of voices echo in the arena around him and embrace him in support and something close to reverence. He wishes he could freeze time to stay in this very moment for the rest of forever, surrounded by Chan and Jeongin and Felix and Jisung and Hyunjin and Changbin and Minho—this family forged from steel.
Seungmin feels.
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Seungmin exhales, pressing his forehead to the cool window glass, trying to count the trees that pass by in a dizzying blur. Changbin is quiet to his left, sleeping softly, undisturbed. Seungmin watches the shadows trace the soft planes of his face and thinks he could look at Changbin forever.
Seungmin doesn't know what forever means.
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Jeongin sighs, folding in on himself. The wind whistles past his ears, whispers catching on the breeze and floating with the pine needles. “I know, I should’ve told you I was leaving. I’m sorry,” a small, bittersweet smile tugs at his lips. “I’m here now.”
He can almost feel their touch, strong from age-old memories. “Are you there?”
As always, they don’t respond.
Jisung and Minho have been gone for a long time. Jeongin—despite knowing they'd have to leave eventually—was not prepared to keep going without them.
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