notfound23
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- 9-1-1 (TV) (4)
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“Maybe if we were closer in age… I don’t know. Maybe it’d all be different.”
Buck is frozen where he stands. One simple sentence brought every fear he had about their relationship to light. And he was right all along to be afraid. He knew. Eddie knew. They both knew all along.
Buck doesn’t respond.
“I’m sorry, but, I’m not sure there’s much left here for either of us.”
Series
- Part 4 of A Playlist of Love and Loss
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“You’re not from around here.” He says to him. The newcomer smiles.
“How’d you know?”
“Your accent. You’re from the north. Not quite New York, though.”
“Philly.” He takes a drag of his own, never breaking eye contact. “Neither are you. You’ve got a slight drawl to you. You’ve been around.”
“From Texas. Some may say I’m a vagabond.” Eddie smiles, and takes a sip of his own martini with the same hand that’s holding his cigarette.
Series
- Part 3 of A Playlist of Love and Loss
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“While I appreciate the offer, unfortunately I must decline.” Eddie laughs lightly, gesturing to the glass. Across from him this stranger only offers a small smile.
“Seemed down in the dumps. Thought you could use a pick me up.” He looks at Eddie and smiles. While Eddie is in a committed (dying) relationship, he still has eyes. He’s handsome. A square jaw and big muscles, maybe a little older than Eddie. And he smells good. Like earthy woods with a hint of honey.
“You’d be correct on that one, but it’s not really my idea of a pick me up.”
“Oh? Then tell me what is.” He leans in a little closer to Eddie.
Eddie takes a second. He’s playing a dangerous game here. But what does he have to lose when it feels like everything else is lost?
Series
- Part 2 of A Playlist of Love and Loss
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He’s looking down at the ground.
“I think I love you.”
It’s said just above a whisper.
The words leave him before he can stop himself. He realizes what he’s said and looks up at Eddie.
His face is dumb struck. He takes a step towards Buck, carefully. Like he’s faced with a wild beast that he’s trying to tame.
Buck wants to retreat. Hide away. Leave Eddie where he is out of embarrassment and with a confession that he wasn’t ready to admit to him, let alone to himself. Before he can actually back away, Eddie is pulling him into a tight hug. Hand against the back of his head, arm wrapped around him.
Series
- Part 1 of A Playlist of Love and Loss
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- Words:
- 15,666
- Works:
- 4
- Bookmarks:
- 8
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Summary
“I think it might be time for you to go.”
“What—why?” Buck asked.
“You’re a freshman, Buck,” Eddie accentuated the syllables of his name. “You shouldn’t really be here.”
“I have just as much a right to be here as you do.” Buck argued, adjusting himself so he was standing up perfectly straight. Making himself bigger. He was taller than Eddie, he noticed.
So why did he still feel so small standing next to him?
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Evan “Buck” Buckley, freshman star of the UCLA hockey team shows up to university ready for the best four years of his life. The only problem? Everywhere he turns, senior baseball star Eddie Diaz seems to be standing in his way.
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“They’ll be ready by September,” he tells Buck, a little thickly.
“September,” Buck nods. “Good month. Summer end. We can make soup.”
Eddie turns to him. “Not too long away?”
“Nah,” Buck says, hand coming up to cup Eddie’s face. Eddie freezes, but Buck’s just using the pad of his thumb to oh-so-gently brush away a smudge of dirt on Eddie’s cheek. He keeps holding Eddie’s face for a moment more before dropping his hand, shifting to examine Eddie’s neatly planted rows of squash seeds. “Besides. They’re, uh. Worth waiting for.”
or, eddie’s growing a garden. buck might be the most firmly planted thing in it.
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Missing Chris is less of an emotion these days and more of a physical entity. He’s sure everyone can see that he’s slowly hollowing himself out, that he can’t do much of anything else.
But when Jee laughs at him trying to get his tongue to touch his nose, and Mara loops one of her arms through his to keep him from tossing the rest of his cup in the garbage, Eddie feels solid again.
Maybe he likes yellow birthday cake ice cream after all.
(or, gerrard messes with the team's schedules and eddie 'i just drove my son to flee the state' diaz is the only option to watch mara and jee-yun after school on tuesdays, which, shouldn't be a problem at all, right?)
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Buck is fucking frozen. His mouth is dry, and his brain is blank except for oh no, oh fuck reverberating in his frontal lobe. He can’t answer. He feels the pressure against the metaphorical closet door, the hinges creaking against the weight of the boxes crashing down.
“Are those… hearing aids?” He registers Eddie's voice through the ringing in his ears.
It takes him a moment before he can finally whisper it out. He feels his head nod against his will.
“Yeah.”
The door gives out.
or: how a conversation about tardigrades results in buck grappling with a disability he's suppressed, getting hearing aids, and realizing that the family he craves has been there for him all along. in that order.
Series
- Part 1 of hard of hearing buck
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Summary
“What’s your last name, then?” Buck prompts. He doesn’t know what to say, how to keep this going, but he knows he’s not ready for the conversation to end.
“Diaz.”
Diaz. Diaz. Diaz. Buck rolls the name over in his mind. He likes the sound of it.
“Do people ever call you Diaz?”
“Not if they want me to respond.” He smiles at Buck then, a real smile that shows off his slightly crooked teeth. His eyes are a warm, dark brown that makes Buck’s head feel a little like soup.
Well, shit, Buck thinks.
.
.
.evan "buck" buckley is entering his first year of college at ucla, hopeful for new friends and a fresh start. on move-in day, he runs into eddie diaz, basketball star and minor campus celebrity.
they hit it off at first, but someone quickly causes buck to see eddie differently. from then on, buck can't stand the basketball star, but he keeps bumping into him all over campus... among other more surprising places.
maybe buck will find out they have far more in common than he ever expected, and eddie's not so bad after all.
and eddie? well, eddie's down bad from the moment he meets buck.