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ret·ro·grade ˈre-trə-ˌgrād
- being in motion in a direction contrary to that of the general motion of similar bodies
- affecting memories of a period prior to a precipitating event (such as brain injury or disease)
- to go back
After an accident leaves Eddie with amnesia, Buck takes him home to recover, and in the absence of his memories, Eddie reveals parts of himself he’s kept hidden for years.
Bookmarked by rasberrybush
01 Jan 2026
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“You okay?” Buck asks gently, a curious concern clear on his face.
“Mhm,” Eddie replies around a mouthful of beer and then gulps it down loudly, unnaturally.
“You sure? You seem… tense,” Buck says, lifting a wet hand out of the water and gesturing his fingers up and down in Eddie’s direction.
“I’m fine, just tired and sore,” Eddie answers, but he knows it sounds weak to Buck, who knows him too well.
He knows what Eddie is like at his most tired after a shift, has known him through the exhaustion of recovering from a bullet wound and can easily recognize when he’s not telling him everything. The thing about Buck is that he is persistent and sometimes he does it loudly, passionately pestering until he can help. Other times he persists quietly, steps in and knows just what Eddie needs.
—
Or a gay, tired eddie gets massaged in a hot tub and lets himself have what he wants
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 4,715
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 11
- Kudos:
- 282
- Bookmarks:
- 39
- Hits:
- 1,909
Bookmarked by rasberrybush
25 Dec 2025
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"What, you think I'm making it up?"
"No, I'm just saying, like, I've seen you. We share a locker room."
"So?" Buck demands, hilariously outraged.
"Just saying." Eddie shrugs, grin tugging at his mouth, and goes in for the kill. "You know, nothing to be ashamed of, but I'm pretty sure I'm bigger."
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Or: Buck, and Eddie, and the (literal) dick measuring contest.
Bookmarked by rasberrybush
25 Nov 2025
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"I'm Buck."
"Buck," Eddie tests the name out. Buck. He likes that name. It sounds good, warm and safe and comfortingly familiar on his tongue. "You're my husband."
Buck's eyes widen, obviously surprised that Eddie remembered that. See, look? He's recovering remarkably quickly. He'll have his full memory back in no time.
"Your husband," Buck repeats and Chris, for some reason, starts giggling.
"My husband," Eddie agrees happily.
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Eddie suffers temporary amnesia after an injury at work and makes some assumptions about the nature of his and Buck's relationship.
Series
- Part 1 of (You Want To) Make a Memory
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 20,131
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Comments:
- 166
- Kudos:
- 5,447
- Bookmarks:
- 1,156
- Hits:
- 50,731
Bookmarked by rasberrybush
25 Nov 2025
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“You were drunk. I know it didn’t mean anything. Everything’s alright.”
Buck visibly winces. “That’s not — Eddie.”
There’s a suspended moment where Buck looks torn, standing on the edge of something, eyes fixed on the horizon to avoid looking at the drop, the precipitous canyon below. But then Buck, who can’t lie, who would tear his own chest open to a complete stranger on the street because the truth of him spills so loudly out of every jagged edge, sighs out:
“It meant something.”
There’s a ringing sound somewhere in the distance, getting closer. “What are you…” Eddie trails off.
“I wasn’t — well, I was drunk. But that wasn’t what. Wasn’t why. Not entirely, or — god.” Buck shudders in a breath, steeling himself. “I have feelings for you.” He closes his eyes. “I’m so sorry.”
~
Buck confesses his feelings. Eddie’s straight. If he spends all his time thinking about Buck and looking at Buck and wanting to be around Buck, well, that’s just being a good friend, isn’t it? He’s being so normal about this, actually.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 22,242
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Comments:
- 277
- Kudos:
- 2,474
- Bookmarks:
- 674
- Hits:
- 27,520
Bookmarked by rasberrybush
04 Oct 2025
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“Jesus, man, no. It’d jostle my shoulder too much. I’ll just wait it out till it hurts less.”
Buck stills, hand pausing mid-rummage.
A beat of silence.
“I could help,” he says softly.
What?
“Run that by me again?”
“I could—” Buck pulls the Fleshlight out of the bag and sets it on the countertop. Oh. Okay. That’s there now. A Fleshlight on his kitchen counter. Jesus Christ. “I could help. It wouldn’t be a big deal. I wouldn’t even be touching you, it’d just be … a—you know—helping hand.”
A helping hand. Eddie feels like he’s been cracked over the head by a heavy object, but sure, it’s just a helping hand. Nothing to worry about. Nothing to question.
Jesus.
Eddie should cut this conversation off. He should also stop staring at the Fleshlight like it’s a grenade about to go off.
Buck shrugs. “It’s practical. It’d—it’d solve your problem, right?”
OR
Kinktober day three: sex toys
Series
- Part 3 of Kryptonian Fictober 2025
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 4,178
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 46
- Kudos:
- 893
- Bookmarks:
- 73
- Hits:
- 5,831
Bookmarked by rasberrybush
03 Oct 2025
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“You cooked, like you always do, and it was amazing. Let me do this,”
“Yeah, yeah, chef's kiss, I get it, but-“
Buck is cut off because Eddie is kissing him. It takes his sluggish, wine-drunk brain a few seconds to catch up, and by then Eddie’s mouth is no longer on his own, and Buck would assume he'd hallucinated the whole thing if not for the vaguely manic look in Eddie’s big, wide eyes.
“Um. Chefs kiss?” Eddie says, punctuated with a hollow laugh.
Or, Eddie manages to enlist Buck into cooking for their date before Buck even knows that they're on one.
Bookmarked by rasberrybush
30 Sep 2025
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Has Eddie ever thought about this?
The question first hit him as he drove to clear his head, somewhere between his apartment and the freeway, and it hasn’t let up since. It’s needling at him like an itch he can’t reach, impossible to ignore, impossible to forget.
Has Eddie ever looked at another man and wondered? Has he ever felt that slow, curious burn that’s crawling its way up Buck’s throat right now? Has he ever, holy fuck… has he ever looked at Buck and wondered?
He needs to know.
No.
He needs to show him.
Or; What if after Tommy kisses Buck, his only thought is I want to do this with Eddie.
Bookmarked by rasberrybush
22 Sep 2025
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“You didn’t tell me your agent’s name was Dick,” Eddie says, halfway to a laugh.
Buck tries to force a smile onto his face, but it won’t come. “Yeah, he didn’t mention that before. Apparently, that was info he only wanted to share with you.”
“Oh, weird,” Eddie says, like it’s not worth thinking about. “Still funny, though.”
“Hilarious,” Buck says as he pulls into the street and Eddie types in the next address.
OR
The problem isn't that Buck's real estate agent is into Eddie or that Eddie seems to like it; it's a matter of professionalism.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 12,733
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Comments:
- 128
- Kudos:
- 2,195
- Bookmarks:
- 469
- Hits:
- 17,984
Bookmarked by rasberrybush
05 Sep 2025
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Eddie is fast. Buck doesn’t know when to give up. You can imagine what happens next.
***
“We should race, is all I’m saying.”
Eddie shoots him a look like he wants to ask why on Earth Buck, as a grown ass man, would want to race another grown ass man before he simply shrugs. “If you want. Just to my house?” He points forward, where Eddie’s mailbox is quickly coming into view.
“Not now,” Buck shakes his head but his chest tightens at the thought. Weird. “I’m already tired, I don’t want to be at a disadvantage. Not that I think you would have the advantage over me, but we should be at our best.”
Eddie laughs again, softer and less surprised. “At our best,” he repeats. “Right.” He leans closer, getting right up into Buck’s personal space until all Buck can smell is sweat and Eddie. “I think you just don’t want to lose,” Eddie taunts, and Buck is close enough to have front row access to the way a droplet of sweat drips from his hair and slides down his temple and cheek until it hooks down his jaw and underneath the collar of his tank top.
Bookmarked by rasberrybush
04 Sep 2025
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the most remarkable thing about coming home to you (is the feeling of being in motion again) by mentholpainting
Fandoms: 9-1-1 (TV)
14 Jul 2025
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Because here’s the thing about Buck. The thing about Buck is that he likes simple sentences. Easy to follow instructions. When, where, what, how. Buck is smart, of course, and he can understand and infer and deduct from context clues and body language. Technically. Technically, he can do these things. But he prefers not to. He doesn’t like to guess. He doesn’t like to guess, because guessing makes him nervous. And Buck hates being nervous. Doesn’t everyone?
But Buck hates it more than most. Buck likes reassurance, he likes knowing things for certain. Because if he doesn’t know for certain, he’ll stress and he’ll ruminate and he’ll twist himself inside out and backwards wondering and worrying and assuming the worst. And when Buck assumes the worst, he makes terrible decisions. So it’s just easier this way. It’s easier to cut the middle man and for Eddie to decide things for Buck.
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Buck moves out of Eddie's house in Los Angeles. A month later, Eddie and Christopher move back in.
Bookmarked by rasberrybush
03 Sep 2025
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Eddie’s been in Texas for about two and a half months when Buck answers an incoming video call with a grin on his face, one that quickly falls when he sees the look on Eddie’s.
His eyebrows are scrunched together, lips pursed as he chews on the inside of his cheek. He looks anxious – scared, almost, and Buck’s internal Eddie Alarms are screaming.
“Hey, Eds, everything okay?” He asks immediately, leaning forward in the kitchen seat where he’d sat to prop his tablet up.
“Huh? Yeah, yeah, no, everything’s fine, everybody’s alright, just-” He pauses, shrugging his shoulders, but it doesn’t ease any of the tension from his frame.
“Just?” Buck prompts when Eddie doesn’t continue.
“I think- there might-” He trails off again with a groan, rubbing his eyes roughly with his fingertips.
“Okay, you’re starting to scare me, Eddie.” Buck is already mentally calculating how to fit a plane ticket into his budget for this week, committed to cutting down on his takeout budget and maybe cancelling a few subscriptions, but Eddie shakes his head.
Or: A few months after Eddie moves to Texas, he and Buck share a revelatory phone call.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 6,548
- Chapters:
- 2/2
- Collections:
- 2
- Comments:
- 36
- Kudos:
- 619
- Bookmarks:
- 90
- Hits:
- 5,041
Bookmarked by rasberrybush
29 Aug 2025
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Buck and Eddie have a movie night.
Bookmarked by rasberrybush
25 Aug 2025
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"Was the rest of it right?” Buck dares to ask. “Because, Eddie, if he’s right, if - -”
Eddie grabs the paper towel from Buck’s grasp, pressing it to the cut. “If the magic fortune-telling conman correctly guessed that your unrequited gay crush isn’t so unrequited, then what, Buck? You think we’d fall in love? Happily ever after? I don’t know if you’ve noticed, but we don’t get those. I don’t get those. And I’m not - - I don’t - - I’m straight.”
Or, Buck and Eddie stumble upon a tarot reader. He's a little too on the nose for Eddie's comfort.
Bookmarked by rasberrybush
19 Aug 2025
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Buck’s hand slides up the length of Eddie’s arm, his palm catching along the edge of Eddie’s jaw. His other hand mirrors it, framing Eddie’s face with a careful reverence, eyes flitting across Eddie’s features, his lips the focal point.
“One kiss." Buck's words are so, so soft, laced with the slightest hint of determination.
“One kiss,” Eddie echoes, eyes fixated on the dark seam of Buck’s lips, the gentle arch of his cupid’s bow. “So I know.”
“So you know.”
Bookmarked by rasberrybush
15 Aug 2025
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“Your back hurts because you threw yourself into—” Buck does not seem to want to give Eddie an out. If Eddie were a little less tired, a little less emotionally disastrous and in a lot less pain, he’d understand. But right now, he just wants some peace and to lick his wounds.
“I did my job. Can we not talk about this while my dick is out?”
There’s a beat of silence.
Then suddenly, Buck’s face appears just past the shower curtain.
“No. Unless you wanna get out right now because we’re either gonna get pulled on a call or—”
Eddie’s cheeks flush with warmth. He quickly drops a hand to cover himself, turning slightly to preserve what’s left of his modesty.
“I’m not— Eddie, I’m looking at your face.”
“Okay, back it up, Buckley.” Eddie reaches out, pressing a damp finger to Buck’s forehead and firmly pushing him backward until his face vanishes and the curtain swings back into place.
OR
Set in S8A, Eddie does something mildly reckless and tries to hide from Buck in the showers. He does not let him. Horny hi-jinx ensue.
Bookmarked by rasberrybush
12 Aug 2025
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“I met a lady on the call the other day, the one I pulled out of the other unit… she said she was psychic and then started talking about granting wishes. It all sounded so ridiculous, but I-I think she did something to me. I know I sound crazy, but I think I have to do whatever people tell me to.”
Buck jerks back, stands to his full height, and Eddie sees the last twenty-four hours playing through his eyes in perfect clarity, without one second of doubt. Buck believes him, instantly, wholly, without question, and Eddie suffocates the sob in his throat.
“Oh, Eddie, you’re…” Buck says, “wait, is that why you were giving that guy your number?”
“That’s your question?” He gasps through a laugh, and it’s wet and dangerous.
“Yes,” Buck says, without an ounce of remorse.
OR
Eddie gets the Ella Enchanted treatment.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 17,985
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Comments:
- 127
- Kudos:
- 2,557
- Bookmarks:
- 535
- Hits:
- 18,515
Bookmarked by rasberrybush
10 Aug 2025
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The room spun for a beat before settling into dim shapes: the low gray light of early morning bleeding in through the blinds, the familiar slant of their bedroom ceiling—but none of that registered. What hit him first was the body against his.
His cheek was pressed against the top of a spine, rising and falling against his face with heaving breaths. His arm was wrapped around a torso that was moving with his own. His thigh was wedged up against hips that had just pushed back into him.
And that sound—that breath, that low, involuntary sound—it hadn’t come from him.
It had come from—
“Eddie,” Buck whispered. Voice raw, stuck halfway in his throat. He wasn’t even sure he’d meant to say it out loud.
“It’s okay,” Eddie spit, like it had come out instinctively—because Buck sounded scared, or maybe because Eddie was, too.
Eddie huffed, voice rough. “Keep going.”
Buck let out a shocked, stuttered, “Huh?”
Bookmarked by rasberrybush
06 Aug 2025
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“Buck—” Eddie choked out, a strangle of breath high in the back of his throat. “Can I…”
He trailed off. Let go of Buck’s wrist to drag his fingertips up over Buck’s stomach, over the ridge of his sternum, between his pecs, then laid his palm flat there—rubbing.
“Can you…?” Buck echoed, urging him to continue.
“Fuck you.” Eddie spit, flush high on his cheeks, embarrassed. “Here.”
Buck’s face flickered, not confusion but surprise, a split second and then a slow, washed-out smile. “You want to—” he gestured at his own body, “—right here, on my chest?” The note in his voice was soft, stunned, like the question itself was precious.
Eddie nodded, words stuck in his throat, but he didn’t look away. Not this time. He watched Buck’s eyes dilate; watched him draw a ragged breath.
“Fuck, Eddie, yes,” Buck said, almost a moan. He laid back on the bed, propping himself up on his elbows, chest arched out, a blush crawling high up his neck. “You want me to just—” He circled a big hand over his pec, rubbing at the skin, then looked up for confirmation.
Or; Eddie fucks Buck's tits.
Bookmarked by rasberrybush
05 Aug 2025
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“So, you said you loved him and then he—” Hen starts, but Buck sighs dramatically and finally, finally lifts his head to look at them.
Karen has a soft look on her face, and Hen is taking a break from watching Buck with worry to glance at Karen, her expression softening instantly as she does so.
“He said ‘Love you too, man’ and then asked if I–” Buck pauses, sniffling quietly. He’s not crying anymore, thankfully, but he’s likely to start again at any second if he talks about this too much. He grabs his drink, fingers curled around the stem and takes a long sip from it before continuing. “He asked if I wanted a beer. And just … left.”
OR
Buck confesses. Eddie does not pick up on what's happening. Buck spirals.
Bookmarked by rasberrybush
01 Aug 2025