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There is a word that is never used among the Samurai families.
“You are close to Lord Alan, are you not?”
It’s the worst kept of all Samurai family secrets. It is the secret everyone knows, everyone sees, but no one speaks of.
“Ah yes, Ji. I hear that you are close to Lord Shiba.”
Close.
“Ji,” breathed into his skin like a prayer.
Such a simple word for such a complicated situation.
“So this is your best friend! It’s lovely to meet you, Ji.”
It isn’t as if this situation is unusual. For centuries, the Samurai families have been required to ensure the bloodlines continue regardless of the surrounding circumstances. It has happened before, and will likely happen again.
Sarah-Beth Williams is not a traditional Samurai lady, nor a member of the five families. She comes from the west, a tourist who came to visit the island and never left, and her upbringing shows in her method of dress and the casual way she addresses everyone, regardless of their status.
Alan rescues her from a Nighlok, and falls in love with her almost immediately.
“She’s different, Ji. I can’t explain it.”
Sarah-Beth helps Lady Hannah in the gardens, teaches Lord Devon her family recipes, debates books from the library with Lord Victor, and discusses music with Lady Kyoko. Her gently teasing nature brings a smile to Alan’s face he has not seen since the team was summoned. The Samurai Rangers adore her, and she gives them open affection in return. It’s clear how easily she charms everyone.
She is friendly toward Ji as well, just as she is with everyone. She is the one to notice when Ji spends his nights preparing meals, worrying over injuries, or watching over the Rangers. The Rangers appreciate what he does, but it is Sarah-Beth who sits with him in the infirmary, who reminds him to eat when he loses himself in ancient texts, who smiles fondly at him as he observes the team’s training sessions.
“You love him, don’t you?”
“I … “
It would be the simplest thing thing in the world to lie to her, but he falters. Her eyes meet his, knowing, and he swallows painfully. “My lady, I - “
“He loves you very much, you know. I certainly hope you feel the same way.” Her smile is warm, and it hurts to see.
“Yes,” he whispers finally.
Her hand reaches for his, resting gently on his wrist. There is a slight squeeze, and she leans against his shoulder. “I’m glad,” she murmurs.
It surprises no one when Alan proposes.
The only surprise is her hesitation. Ji supposes it’s fair; to become lady of the Shiba Family is a great responsibility. It’s understandable that she would want time to consider.
“Ji? Are you … “ She pauses, biting her lip. “I don’t want to hurt you.”
“You haven’t,” he says after a pause. “You have done nothing wrong.”
It isn’t as if he hadn’t understood what would happen one day. Alan had a duty to ensure the Shiba family continued. And Sarah-Beth has always been kind to him. He harbors no ill will toward either of them.
“I don’t want to get married, Ji.”
He stills in the process of adjusting Alan’s tie, keeping his eyes on the knot. “It’s a bit late to say so,” he remarks offhandedly.
A hand closes over his. “Ji. You know that I love - “
He forces himself to take a step back with a shake of his head. “This is not the time for such thoughts,” he murmurs, and makes himself head for the door.
He doesn’t hate them.
He can’t bring himself to feel negatively about the man who has leaned on him for so long, or the woman who had seen him and understood the things he would never say.
“Are you sure Ji’s okay?”
“Maybe someone should say something?”
“Don’t *say* anything, geez are you blind? Would you want someone to bring it up?”
The Samurai Rangers tip-toe around him during the honeymoon, and he appreciates it even as he lies in his room at night and tries not to think.
And then the new Lord and Lady Shiba return home, and he tells himself that nothing has changed even though everything has.
“Ji, can we talk?”
He looks up in the middle of reorganizing the infirmary and takes in the uncertainty in Alan’s expression. “Did you need something?” he asks. The urge to call him Lord Alan is strong, but this is a battle he has already lost.
Alan stares at him for a moment and lets out a long sigh. “Nevermind.”
He fulfills his duty as a scion of the Shiba Family. He supports the Samurai Rangers in their war, maintains their weapons, heals their injuries, and ensures they are taken care of. He gives them someone to speak to when times are hard, an ear or a shoulder as needed.
Of course, it is once again Lady Sarah-Beth who sees through him.
“You two are going to talk this out, or none of us are leaving until you do,” she informs them both sternly, folding her arms as she leans back against the door. “I’m sick of watching you both pine over each other.”
“Pine?” Alan echoes, sounding offended.
She silences him with a look. “When I agreed to marry you, you promised me that it wouldn’t change anything between you and Ji,” she says flatly, and he watches as Alan flinches. “I’m not a homewrecker.”
“Of course not,” Ji speaks up, and finds himself flinching back as the look turns to him.
She sighs irritably, reaching up to run a hand through her bangs. “I love you both, you know. And I can’t keep watching you torture yourselves.”
It’s difficult to explain what exactly her presence changes. Alan remains Lord Shiba, running his family’s business, governing the island, and protecting the world as the leader of the Samurai Rangers. Ji continues to handle matters of Shiba House and look after the Rangers.
And sometimes, Alan joins him for the night while his wife stays in her room down the hall.
“I love you,” a voice whispers in the darkness.
A hand distracts him before he can protest, and he tells himself it doesn’t matter anyway.
When the news comes that Lady Sarah-Beth is pregnant, Ji is the one to see to her needs to ensure that the next head of the Shiba Family will be born healthy.
“This is your Otou-san, Lauren,” Lady Sarah-Beth coos at her tiny daughter.
His shock is obvious, and she takes advantage of it to put the newborn princess in his arms. “Lady Sarah-Beth - “ he tries to protest.
The words die in his throat when she smiles at him, and he finds himself swallowing painfully. Alan does not deserve this wonderful, lovely woman.
Ji does not deserve her kindness and understanding.
“It suits you, Ji,” Alan remarks with a smile, which turns into a grin when he glares at him.
Lauren grows, and he finds himself assisting Lady Sarah-Beth in her care. Lauren watches him with wide eyes and learns to smile when he comes to retrieve her for her feedings. Alan sees nothing strange in it, and Lady Sarah-Beth always dismisses his protests with one of her smiles.
He hates it less as time goes on.
“Hey Ji?”
He makes a noise of acknowledgment, the hand in his hair bringing him closer to sleep.
“If you could have anything in the world Ji, what would it be?”
He opens his eyes in the darkness, very aware of where he is and what he has been doing. He thinks of their princess down the hall, of the way she makes Alan smile and the patience she teaches him as he trains with her. And he finds himself saying “I would give you a son.”
The Samurai Council has no objections to the news of a second heir to the family, and Alan remains firm that Lauren is his primary successor. The rest of the families are surprised, but supportive. Alan hums to himself as he prepares for the new baby, and tells Lauren grand tales of her future duties as a big sister.
“You did not have to do this,” Ji tries. “Whatever excuses Alan gives you.”
Lady Sarah-Beth looks up at him and smiles. “I think I felt him move, Ji. Come see.”
He finds himself moving closer, giving her his hand to place on her growing belly. He waits patiently, but feels nothing. “How do you know the child is a boy?” he asks eventually.
She looks at him fondly for a moment. “Because you asked for a son.”
He no longer protests holding the newborn when he’s placed in Ji’s arms, or the name he’s been appointed.
“’tou! ‘tou!” Lauren squeals as she toddles toward him with arms outstretched.
And when Lady Sarah-Beth is dying, poisoned by a Nighlok no one can seem to find, Ji tries his best to care for her as she grows weaker and weaker. Her children argue to stay by her side, and he finds his resolve fading the longer they wait for a cure.
“Don’t die,” Jayden is mumbling, clinging to his mother’s hand. “Don’t die, Mama.”
Lauren has stopped begging, watching her mother with tears that do not fall.
A hand closes on his wrist as he carefully wipes the sweat from her forehead, and he looks up to see Lady Sarah-Beth smile at him, her face tight with pain. “Take … care of … our family … Ji,” she whispers.
“I - “ He swallows back tears of his own, and smiles for her. “Of course, my lady.”
“I love you.” It’s barely more than a breath, and he can’t be sure who she says it to. Her eyes drift closed as her hand falls, and Jayden starts to wail.
Then Sarah-Beth is gone, and he is alone with the children who will never see their mother’s smile again.
But it’s Alan’s devastated face that hurts the most to see.
“Where were you?”
“Out.”
“Alan - “
“I’ll be in the training yard, Ji.”
He does what he can for the heartbroken team, for his distraught children. For Alan, despite how he pushes Ji away. And he does understand, he reminds himself. Lady Sarah-Beth was Alan’s wife, the mother of his children. The woman who had stood by him through the years as he fought back the Nighlok.
Ji’s own grief isn’t nearly so important.
“ … Ji?”
“Alan? What is it, what’s wrong?”
Alan’s face is wet with tears, and he ducks his head as Ji instinctively reaches for him. Ji pauses, studying him carefully. He takes note of the slouch to his shoulders, and the way Alan refuses to meet his eyes.
“I … I did … something terrible.”
Ultimately he forgives Alan, even as his own heart breaks. It isn’t the first time someone has sought comfort in the arms of a stranger during a time of grief. And when the news comes that the young lady is with child, Ji quietly offers the support of the house of Shiba to her.
“You have another son.”
Alan’s shoulders are tense as he stares at the horizon. “It doesn’t matter.”
“It does.” Ji’s voice is sharper than he intends to be, but it forces Alan to finally turn to look at him. “The child has done nothing wrong. He is still your son, Alan.”
There is guilt in Alan’s face, but Ji turns toward the door anyway.
Ji goes about life as always, caring for his children, watching over his Rangers and Shiba House. The war against the Nighlok continues, and the Rangers begin to struggle for victory. They are tired, for reasons he can’t identify and everyone else seems to already know.
“I’m sorry,” Lady Hannah wheezes during practice. She leans heavily on Lord Victor as he wraps an arm around her. “I’m sorry, everyone. I just … I can’t. I don’t - “
“It’s okay, Han,” Lord Devon interrupts, and his voice is unexpectedly gentle. “We get it.”
She drops her gaze, shoulders slumping even as she struggles to catch her breath. “I’m sorry,” she says again, sounding near tears.
Lord Victor kisses the top of her head, pulling her into his shoulder. The look on his face is one of grief. “You have nothing to be sorry for,” he says quietly.
Alan’s face is unreadable.
It is then that Alan hatches his most ridiculous plan of all.
“It makes sense, Ji,” he argues. “It’s impossible to focus on mastering the sealing symbol when you’re already dealing with sword training and Nighlok attacks every few weeks. If we take away the distractions, it means they’ll have a better chance of succeeding.”
“Yet you mastered the same symbol while dealing with the Nighlok, as have every head of the Shiba clan before you,” Ji points out. “Why do you assume Lauren won’t do the same?”
He watches, bewildered, as Alan’s jaw clenches. “It’s not enough.”
The decision is not one made overnight.
Ji is opposed instantly. It isn’t safe to send the children away from Shiba House, where there are ancient protections each generation of the Samurai Rangers have added as they step forward to take over the responsibility in their parents’ place. The Nighlok cannot reach them behind the wards, and that is why Alan had decided to raise his children here instead of in the larger manor of the Shiba line.
He watches Lauren determinedly correcting Jayden’s grip on his shinai with gentle hands, and reminds himself that there is no other reason behind his desire to keep them here.
“Can we have dorayaki for breakfast today, ’tou-san?”
“‘tou-san doesn’t like sweets for breakfast, remember?”
“But Daddy said dorayaki is a pancake sandwich. Pancakes are breakfast!”
But Alan remains stubborn.
“It’s a good plan, Ji.”
Ji is no better.
“How would you even decide such a thing?” he snaps when Alan pushes yet again. “Lauren is further in her Kendo studies than Jayden, and has a natural talent for symbol power. Jayden learns quickly and few outside of this house and the Council are even aware he exists.”
Alan hesitates, looking uncertain. “I - “
And then Lady Annabell’s soul is stolen, and the Rangers fail to defeat Splitface in time.
Something in Lord Devon breaks at the loss of his wife. He is harsher, colder. He no longer smiles the way he used to, spending most of his time in the training yard or the gardens when he used to be found in the kitchen.
Ji comforts Lauren and Jayden, and takes in the resolve in Alan’s face with dread.
“How long have we been at this, Ji?” he demands, gesturing wide. “Centuries of Shibas have dedicated their lives for a war we never win. We just … push it off for the next generation to deal with! Why can’t we just end it already?!”
“Alan -
“Am I supposed to let Lauren grow up to do the same thing I did, give up on her own hopes and dreams and watch her children follow after her? When is it going to be over, Ji?!”
He has nothing to say to that.
His silence seems to speak enough, and Alan wilts, looking defeated. “I just … I want this to be over, Ji,” he whispers. “I’m so tired of fighting.”
He stops his arguments, and quietly makes the preparations with a heavy heart.
This is the life of a member of the Shiba family, he reminds himself. There is no one else with the power to form the sealing symbol. This is Lauren’s destiny.
“I’m sorry,” Alan mumbles into his neck, holding tight in the darkness of the room.
He stares at the ceiling, hands tangled in Alan’s hair and pretends not to feel the wetness on his neck. Lauren and Jayden are Alan’s children, he reminds himself.
“I’m sorry, too.”
On April 3rd 1996, Master Xandred finally breaks through the seal and enters the world.
Ji sends one of his children away in the night.
Five Samurai Rangers leave, but only three return.
“One day the great responsibility of being Red Ranger will fall to you. Remember: Protect the world from evil, stand by your allies, never run from a battle.”
Ji does not forgive Alan for dying.